#// and while not actively they do consider themselves gods in a sense

[lunaa007]

Astrology observations #3

These are my personal observations and should be taken in the context of the whole chart, never isolated 😊

Some of this is 18+, no minors allowed

♦️Mars-Uranus aspects can indicate a liking for risky activities and extreme sports, like motorcycling or base jumping. They can even like to put themselves in danger as they need the adrenaline. Routine is super boring for them, they need to try new things very often. They should be careful to release this nervous energy with sports, work they're passionate about or things like that or it can backfire. This aspect can be tempered down with Saturn aspects or a lot of earth energy in the chart.

♦️Venus square mars aspect: can often be mean to the person they like, classic "if he pulled your hair it's because he likes you" stuff. Can be very passionate, might have difficulty to separate feelings from lust. They might have talent for artistic sports like dancing or ice skating. For women, they might like a more sporty fashion style.

♦️Sun-saturn aspects: especially for harsh ones, this can really change the expression of the sun sign. I know someone with sun and several planets in Leo, but they are all square to Saturn and you could never tell she's a Leo; she is very reserved, shy and restrained in life. But as with all Saturn aspects this can change with age, the personality coming through more and more while keeping an amazing sense of discipline, wisdom and grounding.

♦️Moon-uranus aspects: with harsh aspects (conjunction, square, opposition), the mother might have been emotionally cold during the childhood, and she might have been a bit erratic and unpredictable. This could have showed up as frequently moving places, or having a mother considered weird or crazy by society. With soft aspects like trine or sextile this could show up as an untraditional family, maybe having two fathers or two mothers, or parents very into technology, but this was not hard on the person and it helped them develop their individuality and independence.

♦️Taurus mercury: these people can learn much slower than other people (this does not mean they are not as intelligent, their rhythm is just different). At school they might have felt behind their schoolmates or felt like they didn't have enough time to finish their exams/homework. It is important that they don't feel bad about this and take the time they need to do their work. This might be less strong with Uranus influence on mercury. ♦️ Aquarius moon natals and their need to always read and watch self-development content without ever actually feeling their feelings 🙃

♦️ Venus conjunct moon: these people are so kind, they have such a big heart and do not wish harm on anyone, please stay mindful of who has access to you as many people might want to be in contact with this energy but sometimes also energy vampires.

♦️ Mercury conjunct/square pluto and their dark humor! I have this in my chart and one of my colleagues actually said to me three days after she started: "your jokes can be really dark sometimes" 😂 it gets worse when I'm tired as I don't filter my jokes so much before saying them. These aspects might also think a lot about death and dark themes, they can be the type to think "what happens if I die tomorrow", or "I could die if I do this" but not in a worried way, just thinking rationally about what is possible.

♦️ Leo mars women and their secret backup plan of becoming a stripper or an exotic dancer 💃 these women often have a talent for dancing, and performing can make them feel desired and confident.

♦️ Aries moon/mars placements and their road rage! Both my parents have these placements and my god the number of stressful rides to school I had when I was a child 😂 this can also apply to the other fire mars.

♦️ Lilith conjunct ascendant: these people often provoke reactions everywhere they go, they rarely go unnoticed whether it is positive reactions or negative. The women with this aspect might get sexualised a lot, and the men with this aspect might attract animosity from other men. ♦️ Sun-jupiter and moon-jupiter aspects: they might always see the bright side of things, "it will get better", "this is temporary", seeing the glass half-full. A lot of optimism, faith in a higher meaning, maybe too optimistic sometimes and too trusting that things will unfold in the right way.

♦️Mars square pluto women often attract creepy men on the street, interactions with aggressive men might be unfortunately common. It is important to not repress their anger and channel their power in something like martial arts.

♦️Gemini moon/IC: they might love to talk with their loved ones at home, a lot of communication and learning in their private life. If they live alone they might be a lot on the phone or always have music or tv or radio on.

♦️Mercury square saturn: they might doubt their intellectual abilities when young, their learning style might not fit the classic school system. It is important that they are encouraged by their family, and with time they will gain confidence and master the learning techniques that fit them best.

♦️Mars in virgo might care too much about pleasing their partner in bed and have a hard time receiving pleasure without giving anything. They might also feel self-conscious if they do not feel "clean" like not fresh out of the shower. It is important for them to practice letting go of their thoughts and doubts and be present in their body. They deserve pleasure as much as everybody else!

♦️ Jupiter in the 2nd house might have a very good self-esteem, if the moon and venus are not too afflicted. And if it is the case it helps the native deal with the harder aspects.

♦️ That's why it is so dangerous to interpret an  aspect in isolation of the rest of the chart, a challenging aspect might be very beneficial in a chart and less in another one. For instance moon conjunct saturn might be more challenging for a Capricorn moon which is already quite controled and closed off, but in the sign of Aries it might help the native tame their impulsivity and control better their emotions. 

♦️ Or moon square Uranus might be beneficial for a Capricorn moon or a Taurus moon as it might help them break out of their routine and become more adaptable and flexible to change.

Thank you for reading!

@lunaa007

[newkatzkafe2023]

To celebrate new monkeys, how would the Wukongs’ react to a mate who is basically like Discord? You know, teases them, has chaotic magic, probably some clingy behavior since they didn’t really have someone who cared about them. Just heaven’s nightmare meets self proclaimed god or goddess of chaos.

MY LITTLE PONY!!!!!!! DISCORD IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE MLP CHARACTERS!!!!!!!🤩🤩🤩🤩

(Lmk Wukong) You are his dream girl. The chaos, the anarchy, the pranks he wouldn't be able to come up with in a million years. He just had to have you, especially when learning how sweet and caring you actually are when you're not being a bad girl🤤. Wukong wasted know time wooing you over after another day of you never making sense, he cooed and flirted all while you flirted and teased him. It wasn't hours before you were making out as exploding peaches cobblers rained down on heaven and earth.

(MKR Wukong) Ohhhhhhhhhh, you two are a match, and he totally feels it's meant to be, just as much as you do😉. You are so beautiful, so powerful, so Chaotic he just wants to take you home so bad🤤🤤🤤. It's safe to say that he will adore you, and you're a chaotic magic, especially when it's really sticking it to heaven and its stupid forced organization. It all started when he wasn't invited to the celestial banquet and therefore he robbed them blind but surprise surprise you weren't invited either. So you both met up and came up with a plan to get back at everyone😈. Then, hours of watching your magic at work was when he knew he was in love with you. He took full advantage of your clingy nature as he would demand unpresided cuddles from you personally.

(HIB Wukong) Your chaos actually scares him😳. the way you torture the 3 realms, specifically heaven with your Chaos magic, especially when it's supposed to be out of control. You tease him on a daily basis and perform cutesy fun party tricks for Luier and Silly Girl. Not to mention your pranks on pigsy make him laugh sometimes, which he hates how he let's that happen. The one thing that touches him is how caring and concern you would be for him, which is honestly sweet of you. Wukong may find your magic to be chaotic and unpredictable, but knowing your personality as someone who actually considers him and his emotions, it really feels nice.😊

(NR Wukong) Oh my god, this, this can't happen. Everyone would forbid you from ever meeting him because the chaos would be talked about for the rest of everybody else's life🫢🫢🫢😧😧😧. Not to mention, he can be quite clingy himself, so cuddles and hugs are a must he even except hands holding from you. He fell madly in love with you and your chaos, and especially with how caring and sweet you are to him. You've been his other half ever since you made it rain alcohol🥰🥰🥰

(Netflix Wukong) People have literally cowarded upon seeing you both together. I mean we saw the chaos that he can reign especially in a fit of rage but once he meets you it's over😨. Wukong is very fun to tease and play little pranks on because his reactions and Whines are priceless and adorable. He himself is also the clingy type so the cuddles are very Frequent as they are intimate, when he finds out that nobody cares for you either he had made a Vow to always be there for you as you started to be there for him.

(BMW Wukong) Heaven will totally sh*t themselves so hard they would actively lose weight if you both ever were to meet. You both will always be on the drawing board when it comes to planning pranks and acts of chaos. Although he would be a target to pranks and teasing as long as he does it to you, which is always fair on your part. Not to mention, your clinginess would always be something for him to poke at jokingly, even though he secretly liked that to you as he's always touching you in some way. The point is you guys will be a match made in hell for heaven and everybody else that knows you personally!!!😈😈😈

(Destined one) Ahhh, clingyness is the one thing he will never mind from you. The Destined one definitely tends to get bamboozled by you and your magic, but he definitely never minds it. It comes to be quite useful in the journey, and he loves your creativity and enthusiasm for it. Not to mention, the way you would carefully look over him and make sure your prank didn't upset him is very heartwarming to him. But you should know he can have bouts of mischief as well😉😉😉

FEEL FREE TO REBLOG💥

[comicaurora]

These have been pent up for a while, so there's a whole list lol. Some are Aurora, some are not.

1) Can lacrimas carry out multiple purposes at once? Or will they blend them? I'm assuming that this is possible, considering that the automaton in the ruins was using a lacrima as a brain

2) Has anyone tried to make tools or weapons out of lacrimas? I'm talking like chisel that needs no hammer. Or maybe a Fire lacrima on a bow that sets your arrows on fire

3) Can you engrave runes on lacrimas to make them affect themselves?

4) Where can I read more about the Twins? If I'm not wrong they're the creator gods, aided by the Light dragon and the Void dragon to create life, but I might be getting a wrong read on that

5) Since we see Erin successfully become the first Void mage, does that now mean there's potential for him to make a Void lacrima? The dragon probably won't allow it, but still

6) What exactly does elemental corruption of each element do? Fire literally burns you up, as we saw in Arc 1. I can infer that Life likely makes you a chimera. Void corruption makes you a cave crawler. But what do the other one do? Does Earth make you a statue? Does Wind disintegrate you, Thanos style?

7) Now onto the non-Aurora questions, is your art vector or raster? I believe it's vector, but it's always better to confirm

8) What are your opinions on reading into the environment and the character design to infer things about the character themselves? In any type of media

9) Have you played Baldur's Gate 3?

10) Do you have any music that you'd recommend? I've listened to every song I liked so many times that I hate them now.

11) I'm new to Tumblr, anything that I should know? You don't have to answer this one if you don't wanna. I think I know some of the basics already. Reblog what you like, and avoid the terfs, right?

You might be able to tell that I like the idea of the lacrimas a little bit. Just a teensy bit. The artificer in me definitely isn't obsessed. I appreciate any answers you can give :3

Cheers!

Ooh, lots of stuff!

Yes, it's possible. A lacrima can be engraved with multiple spells, set in a casing engraved with commands, or some combination of the two. Typically, all spells engraved directly on a lacrima will activate at once when the lacrima is "switched on", but a spell can be quite complex, and conditional activations are possible - "if-then-else" statements, basically.

Yes, magic items exist.

Generally no. If the lacrima is disrupted or broken, the spell generally stops functioning, so a self-affecting lacrima will run only as long as it takes for the lacrima to distort or break.

There's an extra lore page about them!

He probably could if he wanted to (and the Dragon allowed it) but Void energy is very dangerous, so he likely doesn't want to.

Each form of elemental corruption agitates the presence of the element in the mage's body. Earth corruption can damage or alter bones, encourage unhealthy petrification of soft tissues, etc. Wind corruption can have physical effects but it often most obviously produces breakdowns in the person's ability to speak or understand language. Lightning damages, numbs or intensifies a person's physical senses.

Raster, I draw with CSP's digital pens. I've only very briefly experimented with vector art - I don't like how it simplifies the lines.

I think it's a fun school of analysis but, like all literary analysis, it runs into trouble if it tries to lock down exactly what the writer was thinking or intending (which is an objective fact that one can be incorrect about) rather than trying to analyze the story on its own and what meaning might, intentionally or unintentionally, be factoring into it.

Nope

don't trust my taste in music it's 90% nu metal and sonic OSTs

Like what you like, reblog what you want, generally it's considered dubious form to add a comment to a reblog unless you have something profound to contribute (commenting in the tags is fine), steer clear of discourse and callout posts and generally the sectors of the site that are constantly on fire, blocking someone for any reason is 100% fine

[tallerthantale]

What Does Aziraphale Actually Believe Part 10: Returning to Heaven

If you are currently avoiding Good Omens content right now because of the allegations against Neil Gaimen, (which I personally find both credible and damning) consider jumping to the end note rather than skipping this post.

This is a series of my takes on what Aziraphale believes through the timeline of the show. It is all my personal interpretation, and I am happy to hear others. You don’t need to read them all in order, but know that I am coming from a perspective on Aziraphale’s machinations that can be difficult for people without a psychology background to follow without the first two as a primer. The quick version is that Aziraphale has a set of beliefs that exist in some form or another within his mind. However, at any given moment, only some of them exist ‘with awareness.’ The context of the moment will determine what lives on the surface and what stays buried outside of Aziraphale's experience of consciousness, whatever arrangement best prevents a threat to Aziraphale’s sense of self and makes whatever he is inclined to do feel right.

Season Two Begins

Aziraphale is still not really acting like someone who rebelled against heaven. He's imagining himself as having a polite dispute with his colleagues, they just don’t send him on missions anymore and don't want his reports. As far as he sees it, the library is still an embassy (independent), and he is still a representative of God (independent). He is trying to maintain a semblance of the habits and routines he had when he was avowed by heaven, the familiarity is comforting, but there are limits to how much of it he can recreate. Some of what he’s missing he gets from Crowley, giving him reports instead. 

The sword of Damocles dropped, and Aziraphale remains ethereal. In many ways both he and Crowley are free to give up their tendencies to live double lives, but old habits die hard. During the lockdown, Aziraphale doesn’t want Crowley moving in, it doesn’t feel right yet. Crowley still feels a theoretical obligation to perform acts of demonic influence, even though he doesn’t actually want to. They have over 6000 years of earthly lived experience pushing themselves to go through the motions, and 4 years of something like freedom. They spent almost three times the time raising the wrong antichrist to write rude words on a description of a dinosaur. 

Aziraphale has the tools he needs to create a belief that he and Crowley can carve out a life together, but he is still sorting out the details. We start to see it in ‘our car’ and the implied ‘our shop.’ The ‘our car’ was presumptuous, and Aziraphale does take Crowley’s willingness to cave for granted in ways that are concerning, but there are some points of context that add depth to it. 1) Crowley actively enjoys complaining about things he isn't really bothered by and they both know it. 2) Bentley is sentient, and clearly considers Aziraphale a co-parent. 3) Aziraphale claiming Bentley as a joint asset seems to have prevented demons from entering uninvited.

I do think The Ball was Aziraphale's version of a confession, hoping they would dance, and talk things through as they danced. It’s not the best plan, because there are a ton of built up conversations they need to have with each other that are going to be hard to do with a room full of people as a backdrop. Even so, it could have been starting point for those conversations. He really is trying to make something happen, and he’s going at the preparations full steam while Crowley is still in ‘it’s not like that’ mode. I read Crowley's confusion as him personally being veeery asexual, and assuming all along that Aziraphale was the same. IMO, he was completely oblivious to possibility that Aziraphale could be comparatively allo, though there are many open interpretations.

The big jumps forward with Aziraphale’s understanding of his relationship to Crowley, the universe, humanity, and the world do not erase his older beliefs. They add to his options. As we get to the end of Season 2, he’s got a lot of options. As I went into at the start of this rambling mess, in a way Aziraphale still believes everything he has ever believed, no matter how self contradictory that gets. Some things are just deeper in storage than others. That said, I think we can talk about what his recently active beliefs are through the modern events of Season 2. In my opinion, this is where things stand in the mind of Aziraphale:

Angels are aligned with good in the abstract, demons with evil in the abstract, and they imperatively should act in accordance with that, even if often they descriptively don’t. 

This follows metaphysical (ethereal / occult ) categories, not professional roles, and therefore still applies to both Aziraphale and Crowley.

Crowley would be better off free of the obligation to be up to no good, and no longer being professionally a demon hasn’t done the trick.

God felled Crowley as a deliberate injustice in service of a bigger picture plan.

God plays games, but in the service of a greater good, and heaven ought to be aligned with Her purpose. Heaven is currently failing in that obligation.

Aziraphale still thinks he can intuit God’s will and is mostly aligned with it. 

Heaven is being run by angels that are out of line with God’s will, but they retain their angelic nature because they are too ignorant to be responsible for their failings.

He was able to successfully convince Gabriel and Beelzebub to cancel the war.

The institution of heaven is powerful enough to crush them both if diplomacy fails.

The bookshop and car are mutually owned by him and Crowley. Their earthly existence is for them both to share, and they mutually committed to defending it.

Aziraphale and Crowley’s life on earth is unprotected under heaven’s current leadership.

Aziraphale and Crowley are the only celestials with actual knowledge of good and evil.

Having that knowledge incurs a heavy moral responsibility to choose good.

Crowley chooses good more reliably than Aziraphale does.

All of these play into the Final Fifteen.

Angelic Status

I believe for most of their time on earth, Aziraphale has stopped just short of pursuing a proper courtship with Crowley because of their professional and existential positions on ‘opposite sides.’ By the end of the botched executions, the professional role wasn’t an excuse anymore, but in the lockdown special he still wouldn’t let Crowley move in. The existential ‘sides’ still mattered. By the Start of modern Season 2, I think he finally let that go. He was finally ready to fully not care that Crowley was a demon. That doesn’t mean they were actually on the same page about it conceptually though.

Aziraphale has pretty consistently struggled to understand Crowley’s demonic status the way Crowley would see it. While to Crowley it is his assumed identity, and his former angel self is like a deadname, (or my favorite term for it, his ‘cis-sona’) Aziraphale understands Crowley to be suffering unjustly under the temporary state of being currently classified as a demon. Yes, there are many ways this is enormously dismissive of Crowley and insensitive to Crowley. But that isn’t all that it is. Aziraphale doesn’t think the fall was right, and he never did. Sure, that's like, a baseline expectation for having compassion for Crowley, but the implications for how Aziraphale sees things are huge. 

There are a few options for how Aziraphale can process this opinion that he can roll through. I think sometimes he blames himself. Sometimes he just avoids thinking about it. Sometimes he thinks Crowley will just spontaneously go back to being an angel again, like it was a clerical error. Most of the time though, I think it’s about God playing games putting together the Ineffable Plan. Aziraphale has been no stranger to God allowing injustices, he considers the greater good, the end game. 

If God is playing a game unfairly casting Crowley out, perhaps it’s to prove a point by bringing him back. Aziraphale thinks Crowley is the better of the two of them, and he knows he hasn’t fallen. Heaven sentenced him to death, and it didn’t stop him from being an angel. And yet Crowely, his better half, is a demon. Crowley has parallels to Jesus that are probably not lost on Aziraphale. Crowley coming back as an angel and being put in authority over nearly every other angel in existence the way Aziraphale imagines it would be a vindication of Crowley as the ultimate martyr, and a fuck you to all the angels who looked down on him. See end note.

The issue remains that it isn’t the framing Crowley would give himself, and it is alarming that Aziraphale fails to be aware of that. Aziraphale has spent 6000 years in a sort of solipsism, where his intuition is what he looks through for understanding everything in the world. Sometimes he understands that other people will see things differently, and sometimes that slips. Divining his sense of self through intuition has benefit as a tool to free him from heaven’s brainwashing, but it also carries a risk of arrogant superiority and blind spots. Aziraphale still isn’t fully at peace when it comes to accepting that Crowley’s demonic status is an avowed identity, not a transient trial. And as I said in post 3, when you try to run on intuition in an area where you aren’t at peace with yourself, that will fuck your shit up harder than a sideways pineapple. 

The Final Fifteen: Return of the Mindfuckery

Aziraphale enters the conversation with The Metatron believing he wants to stay on earth, and that the leadership of heaven is not aligned with God's ineffable will. When The Metatron offers Aziraphale the position of supreme archangel, his belief that God is good and heaven ought to be aligned with God's will gets pulled to the surface, along with his conviction that he can intuit God's will, and confidence in his ability to make a difference, already inflated from setting in motion Ineffable Bureaucracy. That on its own isn’t enough. Aziraphale doesn’t want to leave his life on earth with Crowley behind, he has just started to be at peace building a life in Shades of Grey.

When The Metatron offers angelic status, it gives Aziraphale the option to believe The Metatron is endorsing Crowley as a vindicated martyr. It lets Aziraphale believe that the Metatron is on team Ineffable, and Aziraphale really will be given enough actual power to genuinely reform heaven. But it isn’t the only option it gives Aziraphale. There is a fork, and not just in the road. 

When The Metatron offers to sanction his relationship with Crowley, he goes out of his way to bring attention to how unsanctioned it used to be, how long it was like that, and how serious it still is. By bringing up Crowley and Aziraphale’s full history, The Metatron is reminding him of all the thousands of years of fear of discovery and instability. They could have been executed for it, they nearly were, they could order executions again, and they might work this time. He didn’t need to point out how long running their collaboration was, and he didn’t need to refer to it as a de facto partnership either. Offering to let Aziraphale take Crowley with him could have just been about the fact that they are clearly working together now. The way The Metatron highlighted their history provoked Aziraphale’s fear. 

Aziraphale may refuse to believe The Metatron really speaks for God, but he is afraid enough of him to get mindfucked about it given an attractive enough looking alternative. It is particularly telling of the level of mindfuckery at play that The Metatron describes Aziraphale as someone who is honest, and doesn’t just tell people what they want to hear, and Aziraphale accepts that. It would have taken work for Aziraphale to keep that red flag out of his awareness.

Where Aziraphale has resisted the mindfuckery of danger from The Institution of Heaven before, the alternative has been horrifying. Lie to thwart the archangels, or allow the murder of children. Defy The Institution, or participate in the destruction of the universe. He had no way forward that preserved his sense of self, and he took the least horrible of the options he had. Going back to heaven may not look like an ideal option, he doesn’t really want to leave the bookshop, but as the Metatron initially presents it, it's not conflicting with Aziraphale’s sense of self. Framed as an opportunity to reform heaven into his own ideal, it would conflict with Aziraphale’s sense of self to turn the offer down. 

Aziraphale sees this as an opportunity to make the universe right. I don’t think he believes it will be simple, easy, or guaranteed to work, I think he feels obligated to do everything he can to try. If there is even a chance, no matter how small, he has to try. He remembers Crowley being happy as an angel, but not that it was God that took the smile away. He remembers Crowley looking for ways to avoid his evil missions and be kind under hell's nose, but not that God tasked hell's minions with doing evil in the first place. He remembers that Crowley often chooses to do good, but not that to Crowley, the choices he was making were choosing to oppose the system, not aligning with God. Aziraphale has been able to think of Crowley as aligned with God’s Ineffable will. He has been thinking it more and more into the modern era. He concluded long ago that God would forgive Crowley. 

He forgot to consider that it is Crowley who would need to forgive God.

The Final Fifteen: Schrodinger's Threat

The Metatron has appeared before Aziraphale wearing dark colors, offering an oatmilk late, talking about experiencing the earthly world. This sets him apart from the other angels, it is a signal that he has also eaten the metaphorical apple, he is not naive to good and evil the way the other celestials are. Aziraphale's only points of reference for worldly celestials are himself and Crowley. He associates the knowledge and mixed black and white with the pursuit of nuanced ethics. He has no frame of reference for an entity that fully understands the nuances of ethics but chooses to impose dogmatic authoritarianism anyway.

The part of Aziraphale’s mind that lives outside of conscious awareness gets to decide between two realities. 1) The Metatron cannot be trusted, he is threatening him, plotting to destroy Crowley, nowhere is safe, there are no good options, Crowley won’t play along, ect… or, 2) The Metatron is actually aligned with God’s ineffable will just like he and Crowley are, and he and Crowley can fix heaven together and live happily and safely ever after. If your priority is picking the reality that is most palatable, that isn’t a hard choice. 

Remember, it isn’t a conscious choice. Aziraphale is not arguing in an internal monologue with himself that he is better off deciding to believe the naive thing, the parts of Aziraphale's mind that are outside of his awareness are preventing his conscious mind from seeing anything other than the naive thing. Every reason he has to not trust The Metatron didn’t load into his conscious awareness and instead fucked off to the Bermuda Triangle. The evidence The Metatron cannot be trusted wasn’t rejected or discounted, it functionally does not exist. Every reason he had to know Crowley would never go along with the plan did the same thing. 

Even his own memories of his own time in heaven fucked off. When Aziraphale said it would be “like the old times, only even nicer,” a lot of us had an initial reaction along the lines of, maybe it was nice for you, but not for Crowley. The thing is, that's backwards. The Star Queen was having a blast making the universe while Aziraphale was skittish and terrified. The good old times weren’t ever real for Aziraphale, they were what he had to imagine into existence to cope with existence. Aziraphale wants to put himself in a miserable position of responsibility that he will hate, in order to remake heaven into a place Crowley can be happy again.

Much of the theorizing I have seen around Aziraphale's behavior in the Final Fifteen assumes a dichotomy. As most people see it, the story must be one of two things, either Aziraphale sincerely believes The Metatron's offer, and sincerely wants Crowley to come back to heaven with him and be angels together doing good, and sincerely thought Crowley would go for it and be happy about it, OR he was so scared shitless by The Metatron that everything he is doing and saying is put on for their safety.

The horrifying truth of how our minds work is that there is no dichotomy. 

Aziraphale sincerely believed in the plan, sincerely believed Crowley would happily go for it, and sincerely remembered being in heaven as nice, BECAUSE he was scared shitless by The Metatron and had to buy into it for their safety. He had to genuinely believe those things to feel safe, so he did. I don't think The Metatron made any explicit threats or coercions. He didn't need to. Aziraphale's existential terror did all the work on its own, and it did the work without leaving a trail for Aziraphale’s conscious mind to see.

The Final Fifteen: An Uninformed Decision

Aziraphale had not been told about the plans for Armageddon 2.0, or why Gabriel lost his memory, or that he was risking getting stashed in a heavenly closet after being mind wiped for refusing to go along with The Institution. I have been frustrated with Crowley for not bringing this up. While my frustration with both of their poor communication skills continues, I noticed that Crowley probably thinks that he did bring it up.

In the bandstand argument, Crowley twice tries to make sarcastic logical incisions to get through to Aziraphale. “You should kill him yourself then, holierly.” “ Unforgivable, that's what I am.” He is saying these things to deconstruct what Aziraphale said before, not as face value statements. Aziraphale ignores the argument inside them both, treating them as face value non sequiturs and offering his own. 

In the Final Fifteen Crowley makes another sarcastic logical incision by saying “when heaven ends all life on earth, it will be just as dead as if hell had ended it.” Aziraphale picked a hell of a day to stop taking Crowley’s sarcastic incisions at face value, because as much as this is a sarcastic logical incision still, it is actually also face value this time. Crowley is telling Aziraphale that heaven is planning on ending all life on earth. Like, NOW. And given the way Aziraphale has interpreted him in the recent past, Crowley would reasonably expect him to follow along with that. 

Aziraphale thinks if he is in charge, he can put in place the plan he expressed in S1E4, celestials keep the earth running so humans can keep having free will. Aziraphale is not happy about it when The Metatron mentions the second coming. But he still doesn’t know that he is queuing himself up for the same fate as Gabriel, since Crowley skipped that point in his understandable frantic distress. I really do think it would have made a big difference in how the scene went down if it had come up.

In this series I have described Aziraphale's choice as a mistake, but I want to clarify what I think the mistake was, because it wasn't deciding to go back, not really. The mistake was how he brought the situation to Crowley.

Had Aziraphale refused to go, both of them could have been rapidly removed from existence. There is a very compelling case to be made that returning to heaven and trying to dismantle the system from the inside while playing along on the surface is their best option. The end of the universe ends everywhere, they are attached to the earth, and even with the combo miracles Aziraphale wouldn't have it in him to wage full on war against heaven with a diplomatic offer on the table. It's possible Crowley could have been moved by that argument, or it could have prompted Crowley into sharing about the memory wipes.

Realistically the situation was probably moving too fast to put a real strategy in place, and I don't think Crowley would take the elevator up either way, but the most hurtful part of the conversation is how long Aziraphale goes still presenting a return to heaven as unambiguously positive news, seemingly oblivious to how Crowley would take it, and how Crowley does take it standing in front of him. As strong an argument as there is for them to suffer the hardship in order to strategically dismantle the system from inside as the least bad option of what's available, Aziraphale does not make that argument. Crowley can't strategize with the version of Aziraphale who thinks The Metatron is on his side. I still fault Crowley for leaving the conversation when he did, as much as I understand why he felt he needed to.

I’m not going to go through the whole argument line by line, but I’m going to do a brief review of my impressions of Aziraphale’s more ambiguous statements. 

“You can be my second in command” They’re authorising me to be in charge, I will raise you as high as I can on paper, no one will be controlling you. 

“Nothing lasts forever” I’m willing to let go of my attachment to this bookshop if it will secure us a safe future together.

“I don’t think you understand what I’m offering you” We can fully restructure the institution of heaven to be what we want it to be, for us and for the world we took responsibility for. You can have creative control over the reformation. We can be safe and together like we have wanted for 6000 years.

“Then there’s nothing more to say.” I respect your decision not to come with me. 

“I forgive you” for leaving me with the responsibility to fix heaven on my own. (But it was almost ‘I love you.’)

The Final Fifteen: The Aftermath

After Crowley leaves, what Aziraphale can load into his mind shifts again. He can see his fear, and that The Metatron is the source of it. All the reasons he has to not trust The Metatron come back, as do all the reasons why Crowley would obviously say no. The cascade of expressions Aziraphale runs through between Crowley leaving and the Metatron arriving are us witnessing the beliefs, opinions, judgements, and memories that are present in Aziraphale’s experience of consciousness being reformed into a different set. 

When the Metatron comes back, Aziraphale is functionally a different person, and this one doesn’t want to go. He tries very hard to soft no The Metatron. He really, really tries. It is the hardest part of the ending for me to watch by far. I don't think any instance of him was ever really ok with a version of events where he went back on his own. But I also think he fully expects to be smote on the spot if he actually says no, with Crowley smote soon after, and I don't think he is wrong.

For all the heartbreak of the ending, there are some optimistic points from across the span of my character study I want to highlight that I think are often overlooked. 

Aziraphale ideologically split himself off from The Institution of Heaven before Crowley got involved. 

He had a sense something wasn’t right even while the Star Queen was naive. 

He found his own way to form opinions for himself in the midst of an all powerful, rigid, oppressive system. 

He has played Crowley’s role performing political subterfuge temptation missions from hell who knows how many times. 

His perception that Crowley might want to be an angel again, while willfully ignorant and galling, didn’t come from nowhere. 

His tolerance and forgiveness of the other angels comes from infantilizing them, not respecting them. 

He was noticeably upset when The Metatron mentioned the Second Coming. 

Just as Aziraphale’s increasing stack of things he can believe doesn’t undo the imprint of his years of indoctrinated beliefs, The Metatron manipulating him into a disastrous mistake doesn’t undo the growth he has had, the tools he has developed, or the perspective he has gained. The last smile just as he steps into the lift is not sincere, and his stare inside at the end is a declaration of a kind of soft power war. We remember "but rescuing me makes him so happy," but the full line when Nina asks "Why don't you make your own plans?" starts with "Oh, I am."

Part 10/10

End note:

Due to a series of unfortunate events (or two), there was a considerable delay between the bulk of my "What does Aziraphale Actually Believe" series and the last instalment. While I initially felt very negatively about that, it also presented a particular opportunity, as I found myself reviewing the final draft details of The Metatron's manipulation tactics and how they messed with Aziraphale's mind at the same time as I was following the allegations against Neil Gaimen.

As things currently stand I find the allegations against Neil Gaimen very credible and very damning. Information is still coming out, but the odds of something being reviled that would change the gist of my opinion are very unlikely. I don't consider that to be cause to stop engaging with the fandom and analyzing the story. A lot of people who take that position frame it as separating the art from the artist. That is not the framing I use.

Typically I try to keep considerable distance between myself and anything that looks like psychoanalysing public figures. This because of a psychology ethics rule that I take on a broad interpretation of. The gist of it is to not form professional opinions about the psychology of specific people based on their public statements / works. Because what follows is skirting the edges of the spirit of those rules, I want to emphasise that it is my personal opinion, and I am coming at it more from literary analysis than any kind of Sherlockian attempt at deductive reasoning about the workings of a particular person's mind.

The narrative arc of Aziraphale's religious trauma, the way it plays out, the way his opinions bend and reform, the way he gaslights himself in the presence of The Metatron, the way The Metatron wields his power imbalance with a friendly disposition, the way the threats that are never framed as a threat mess with Aziraphale's mind, the way he convinces himself to be happy about what he is being forced into, the way his mind flips back and fourth based on the pressures of the people around him, the particular ways he is vulnerable to being subtly manipulated into appearing complicit in his own exploitation, the detail in how that plays out, these things were all written very well.

Or I should say, they were written very accurately.

The motivation I had to write the "What does Aziraphale Actually Believe" series was that a lot of the ways those features of exploitation were accurately depicted weren't picked up on by the general audience. Because they rang so true to life to me, but were not followed by so many, I sought to explain my understanding of Aziraphale's behaviour to people who weren't sure what to make of it. These mechanisms are often very counter intuitive, not understanding them is pretty normal, and the Final 15 stood out to me as having been written with a very unusually high level of understanding of how exploitative power dynamics operate in real life.

Which is to say…

If the author of Aziraphale's Season 2 narrative arc came to me, and told me that he just didn't realize how power disparities impact people, that he was trying his best and he just didn't understand, I would tell him to go fuck himself with a rake. I can get behind wanting more to be investigated, wanting more information to be corroborated, wanting to see the actual screenshots and emails. I have respect for people who still want more documentation. What I want to push back against is arguments from people who believe the conduct happened, but either think that it wasn't a big deal, that Gaimen could not have been expected to know better, or that he made an unfortunate mistake. Someone that oblivious would not have been able to write the story of Season 2. Someone getting called out for their abuse of power absolutely would claim they didn't know any better as an excuse, it's the most obvious excuse to make.

People who abuse power knowingly are often still able to create a pocket fantasy universe, conjuring sections of time during which they can believe their own lies. They can sit better with themselves and their own actions that way. That isn't the same as not knowing better, it is the most willful of all willful ignorance, and it can flip on and off like a switch. I haven't read Sandman, but the people who have may be able to say if it seems like the work was written by a person who understands that people can create their own pocket realities to live in, and jump into and out of.

One of the common things expressed by those coming forward is that they want people to know that they are absolutely confident Gaimen understood what he was doing. There was a moment in the "Am I Broken" podcast where the survivor made that point, and the host either didn't process what they were being told or dismissed it at the speed of light, pivoting to hoping this would be a learning opportunity for other clumsy people in power who are probably making the same mistakes. It was a very frustrating moment.

I understand it is confusing that the people who engage in serial predatory behavior can rationalize themselves into their fantasy narrative of events while simultaneously engaging in an intentional strategy. But it is what people do. Getting to believe they aren't doing the very thing they planed to do is part of the strategy, and part of how they are able to gaslight people so effectively. The answer to "do serial predators believe they are innocent or do they do it as a honed deliberate tactic?" is yes. Knowing that is key to spotting these patterns in real life.

[dailyadventureprompts]

Hello Mr. Dapper! Love this blog and your many reimaginings of classic dnd deities and creatures. I was curious about something: Considering your dislike of purely evil gods and DnDs future focusing on the guy, what are your thoughts on Vecna?

Deity: Vecna, the Whispered One

My task of overhauling d&d’s villanous pantheon was started by a simple critique:  that if god was evil, there still needed to be a reason for people to worship it. To go with one example,  So many of the death gods in d&d want to kill everything that lives, yet they’re still presented as having legions of followers who are happy to die for them in opposition to the party.   You can say “Oh they’re just brainwashed, crazy cultists” but that’s just bad writing and thematically empty, neither of which I want for the sort of games I run. 

Vecna is actually an interesting case study in that he’s an outwardly wicked deity that has a theme which people would actively want to follow:   As a god of secrets, Vecna is the patron of any who will sacrifice anything to learn the answer to their problems, or conversely, the ones desperate to ensure their own secrets will never be known.  The story of Vecna as a mortal mage who attained first lichdom, then godhood is an aspirational one for all those power mad occultists out there, a common enough demographic in the d&d world both as villains and as player characters. 

Cults of Vecna worshippers likewise make sense as the whole point behind the historical practice of mystery cults was that those at the upper levels maintained their power through control of information and access to secret learnings.  You want to learn how to do magic? To speak to the dead? To protect your secrets from being known? Put on this ominous robe, learn the secret handshake, and don’t forget to drop your tithe intto the altar’s collection skull. Think of it like a forbidden knowledge based MLM. 

 Here’s some adventure hooks: 

While many of the whispered one’s acolytes dedicate themselves to discovering to the delving of arcane mysteries, others focus their attention on more worldly secrets. A powerful noblewoman is being blackmailed by a worshipper of Vecna not only for personal enrichment but also as an act of devotion, after he uncovered proof of indiscretions that would ruin her reputation.  While she’s too afraid to go for help herself and risk exposure, a devoted servant has seen her hidden suffering and has contacted the party for aid. 

Barely disguising its fiendish nature, a devil in service to Vecna approaches the party with an offer to reveal the secret intents or weaknesses of their enemies, if only they will deign to meet its terrible price.  While this information could do great good, or even save lives, just how low are the heroes willing to stoop? 

Seeking out the aid of a powerful mage, the party discover the old man on the brink of nervous collapse, having looked to deeply into the void and filled his mind with visions best left unmentioned.  Haunted by nightmares both real and imagined, he needs their help in quieting his mind through the gathering of rare ingredients and the distillation of a potent elixir. The process is not without risk however, are the party willing to help if it means erasing the information they need from his head, to say nothing of potentially lobotomizing the poor wizard? 

Art

[deconstructingchabad]

Tzivos Hashem

One of the best ways cults and other high-control groups exert their control is through their control of the children in their group, and Chabad is no different.

Tzivos Hashem, Hebrew for "Army of God", is an organization within Chabad aimed at children's programming and education. It was founded in 1980, under the orders of Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson. True to its name, it had a military aesthetic from the very beginning, with meetings referred to as "rallies" and children issued military style uniforms.

Children's pamphlets were distributed with the goal of educating Jewish children around the world, and children were encouraged to memorize the "Twelve Pasukim"- twelve passages selected by Rabbi Schneerson that he considered important in Jewish education. Often, these pamphlets employed military aesthetics, such as the iconic illustration above by Norman Nodel, which depicts a boy and a girl dressed in military uniforms carring banners reading "We want Moshiach now!"

As a child, I was most involved with Tzivos Hashem in the 2000s, after the death of Rabbi Schneerson. My elementary school enrolled each student in the Chayolei Tzivos Hashem program, and as part of the program, we were given weekly "missions" to complete in order to earn medals and rise up in the ranks. Students with higher ranks were given special privileges, and while no student was explicitly punished for not completing their missions, there was a distinct social hierchy that emerged and a fierce competition among us students. Unfortunately, the Chayolei Tzivos Hashem website is only accessable to account holders, but here is their description in their own words:

Drawing on years of experience reaching out to less affiliated Jewish Children, Tzivos Hashem turned its attention to providing inspiring programing and activities for children within the religious community. Chayolei Tzivos Hashem has been designed to give children a sense of pride and belonging, an appreciation for what they do and inspire them to want to do more. Since its inception, CTH has captured hearts and minds of children worldwide. Children feel empowered and special to be entrusted with the Rebbe’s mission to bring Moshiach. As a uniquely tailored program, each child is able to climb the levels and ladders of the Army of Hashem according to their capabilities, giving them confidence and encouragement as they grow at their own pace. At monthly international webcast rallies, recognition and honor is given to students who have gone up in rank. Participating schools also have custom made mission sheets that help students advance in Hashem’s Army. As children complete missions, they earn medals to be placed in their rank books and work themselves up towards a promotion, for all missions, global, local in full or in part, students can earn “mileage points”. They can scan mileage into their personal CTH account using specially designed and programmed kiosks. CTH hosts monthly HQ global raffles where children who have completed missions can have a chance to earn prizes. There is also an online prize store where children can use their points. Piloted in 50 Lubavitch schools, Chayolei Tzivos Hashem’s goal is to continue to develop the program in Hebrew Schools and camps for children of all backgrounds across the world. The program is sponsored in part by Rabbi Moshe Kotlarsky of Merkos L’Inyonei Chinuch and Rabbi Shaya Smetana of Anash.com

When I was in school, most of this wasn't digital, as I was part of CTH in the 2000s, in its infancy.

But, Chayolei Tzivos Hashem is just a branch of Tzivos Hashem. It's intended specifically for children already deeply immersed within Chabad, and it's a tool used to ensure compliance within Chabad's community norms. Some of the "missions" were simple tasks associated with Jewish observance, such as praying every morning, saying the Shema prayer before bed, etc, while others involved Chabad specific tasks, such as memorizing certain portions of Tanya (one of the theological texts of Rabbi Schneur Zalman of Liadi, the first Rebbe of the Chabad-Leubavitch movement) and reaching out to a set quota of strangers as part of Mivzoim.

Some vocabulary: Mivzoim (not to be confused with "Mitzvot") refers to the outreach missions enacted by the Chabad Rebbe. If you get stopped by a Chabad person in the street asking you if you are Jewish and would like to put on Tefillin or do some other Mitzvah, then you've interacted with a Chabad person completing Mivzoim.

While Chayolei Tzivos Hashem leans the most heavily on the military aesthetic, Tzivos Hashem as a whole embraces it full-heartedly, and predates CTH, which was only founded in the 2000s.

If you go onto the Tzivos Hashem website and try to register a child, you will be greeted with this message, for example:

While it's not, of course, an army of violence, the use of military terminology is something used time and time again within Tzivos Hashem.

One popular song that is sung at Tzivos Hashem rallies and in schools goes as follows:

From 770* we're marching out On to victory, without a doubt To corners four, we're marching happily Nation after nation we are conquering! Shluchei Adoneinu**, we'll bring Moshiach Tzidkeinu*** Tomorrow will be Galus**** no more And we'll win this Galus war!

Notes: *770 refers to 770 Eastern Parkway, the International Headquarters of Chabad Leubavitch. **Translates to "emissaries of our master". ***Translates to "Messiah our righteous one". ****translates to "exile".

I'm not even going to touch so much on the near deification of Rabbi Schneerson in this post, I only want to focus on Tzivos Hashem here, and how it primes children into obediance. Even families that aren't necessarily as "crazy" about Chabad as others are still encouraged through social pressure to enroll their children in Tzivos Hashem.

Why the military aesthetic?

Well. It is my firm belief that it because it is grooming children into being good, obedient followers of Chabad. For Shluchim especially (not all Chabadnikim are Shluchim) there is a high expectation of obedience. Shluchim, which are emissary families of Chabad (they're the ones who run Chabad houses and the like), are expected to follow whatever order the governing body of Chabad-Leubavitch International gives them. Every year, there is an international conference of Shluchim, one for the men, one for the women, and, up until around the Covid-19 pandemic, one for families. Shluchim, much like actual soldiers, are expected to pack up and move to wherever they are ordered to move to and establish a Chabad house or go and support and existing one. Except, it would be like if American soldiers were being told that their orders were coming from George Washington himself, since Rabbi Schneerson has been deceased since the 1990s.

So, back to the kids.

You may say to yourself, after seeing perhaps videos of Tzivos Hashem children, or maybe even encountering them yourselves, that they seem to be enjoying it. After all, kids do love playing dress-up and being given little tasks to do with rewards. And that's true- as a kid, I felt special whenever I earned a medal, and I liked getting to refer to myself as "Sergeant". It felt awfully grown up and important.

But there's a difference between a child having a chore chart in their own home or a class having a jar of beans leading up to a pizza party at the end of the year- and between children being pit against hundreds of children around the world. HaChoyel, the weekly Tzivos Hashem magazine, publishes all the names of children who recently ranked into officer positions.

Additionally, this kind of social stratefication at such a young age has the potential to let kids who don't meet the right standards to fall through the cracks, and a culture that already demands obedience of childrens leaves them wide open to abuse. I should know- it happened to me. While Chabad as a whole cannot be blamed for the actions of one disturbed adult in a position of power- I doubt that I would have been so vulnerable to his manipulations had I not felt so inadequate due to my inability to live up to the expectations placed upon me by Tzivos Hashem.

Not to mention, the fetishization of the military aesthetic within Tzivos Hashem only furthers the normalization of militarism and war. For all Chabad talks about wanting to bring about Mashiach and ultimate peace, the movement itself is so deeply entrenched in military emulation. It's no surprise, then, that Chabad as a whole has embraced firearms and community-based militia more so in relation to other Orthodox groups (but that's an entirely different deep dive). And while Chabad hasn't engaged in outright organized (unorganized violence such as riots, on the other hand, is something Chabad isn't a stranger to) violence yet, a high-control organization having such a military lean, certainly within their children's education, sets a dangerous precident, and if it doesn't lead to harm of outsiders yet, it certainly harms its members.

[thebindingofpillo]

Heaven, Hell and everything in between!! As usual I did not proofread any of this, so if you find any mistakes you have full permission to execute me uwu and if you ever need some claryfications I am always ready to answer some asks!!

Anyway, this is the RAU universe. The RAUniverse, if you will. We have Earth, Heaven, Hell and the Void (which is not a really-real dimension but we’ll worry about that later). Every dimension exists as separated from the others. There are ways for angels, demons and human souls to travel from dimension to dimension, but these are few and far between (and I’ll explain better later, in the Bridge section). Every single dimension was created by God, even Hell.

Earth (a.k.a. our dimension)

Humans live here. The physical plane basically. Created by God, as well as everything else. Not really much to say about this! It’s the world as we know it, with all its good and bad. Note: the name Earth does not mean that only the Earth is part of the physical realm! Space and places outside planet Earth also count. You will not reach Heaven by going really high up into the sky, sorry :(

Heaven

Very nice place. It has three tiers, one reserved for humans, one for angels and one for God. At the center of Heaven there is the Garden of Eden, uprooted by God and then placed into a different dimension after Eden (the angel) deserted their post on Earth. To this day, Eden has no idea that the Garden has been transplanted into Heaven (they could know of they wanted to, because they’re omniscient, but they’re actively refusing to think about the Garden at the moment), but that’s not really important here.

Human tier When a human dies, their soul crosses the Bridge (more on that later) and if they’re considered worthy they end up in Heaven. The human parto of heaven is pretty neat, even if I’m still a bit short on the imagination side. I liked the idea from Supernatural where people constantly relive the best day of their lives but idk seems a bit too boring. The basic idea is that Heaven is a place where humans feel their best all the time. If they were plagued by illness, now they’re hale. Everyone is living again in the best possible version of themselves (with like, some caveats, like if your ideal version of self is a furry then tough luck sorry). But yeah, Heaven is the bestest place in the universe where you can bask in God’s light and grace until the end of days. Humans cannot travel through the tiers -- this was put in place by God once he uprooted the Garden, He made it impossible for humans to access it and even put a whole tier of angels between it and humanity for good measure — but that’s not really a problem since heaven is pretty nifty. It is possible, however, to visit other people in the human sphere! So you can always hang out with your pals. The only human who can travel to the Garden is Enoch/Metatron, and that’s just because he was turned into an angel when he ascended.

Angel tier Angels live here. It’s kinda like a city (the Silver city??) but angels don’t really spend a lot of time here, they’re always moving in and out of the various spheres to do God’s bidding, fight demons, and other cool stuff. While humans are confined to the outer sphere, angels can freely travel through all the different layers of heaven, and access the garden, and converse with God directly. While angels do not need rest in a physical sense, it’s always nice to have a little place for themselves where they can wind down after a long century of work. I am still not sure about the design of the city itself (I kinda thought of it like a giant hive suspended in the clouds). Each angel has their own little cell but they can visit eachother.

The Garden of Eden (God is here) The innermost tier of Heaven. Before the Garden, only God lived here, sitting on a throne and surrounded by His angels. The Garden was on Earth before (hidden in a long lost valley, surrounded by very high mountains I think), but after Eden dipped to go live with humanity, God didn’t want anyone stumbling onto the Garden by mistake, and instead of sending another angel to pick up Eden’s slack, He decided to just pack everything and take it home, where He could watch over it Himself. His throne is still somewhere in the Garden, but God is much less inclined to sit on it lately, deeply preferring spending time tending to the plants, keeping them nice for the eventual return of humanity. When’s that exactly supposed to happen? Nobody knows, not even his closest advisors. Not even Apollyon. If asked, the Great Creative will just say that He’s waiting for humanity to “prove itself worthy again” but nobody really knows what that means. Anyway the Garden is b i g. It’s more like a beautiful lush forest rather than a garden, where the trees always give fruit and the animals never attack humans. Everyone lives in peace and harmony, it truly is the bestest place in the universe. The human layer of Heaven is already the best place in the universe but in the Garden humanity will reach a higher state of existence (the details are still fuzzy tho, I need to figure out stuff).

Hell

Hell actually started as an empty place to house human souls who were not worthy of Heaven. It was basically a dark, cold desert, stretching on into infinity. Literally nothing in it but darkness and cold, it was the furthest place away from God’s grace. It began to change only when Lucifer fell. With him, came the rest of the fallen angels and the thing rapidly devolved into a shitshow. Soon the fallens started torturing humans, discovered the power of the human soul, eventually the place became the fiery pit of suffering we know today. Important to keep in mind: Lucifer and his minions are NOT punishing humans. In God’s mind, being far from Heaven is enough punishment for humanity. Demons however, either hate humans (the most perfect of God’s creations), need human souls for power, or straight up do not care about them at all. Most demons either use humans are sustenance or guinea pigs to torture. Slightly more than animals.

Human tier This tier is the closest to what Hell looked like before the demons came. It’s a rocky, endless land, devoid of light, shelter and anything that’s even remotely good. The only difference between this and the “old” Hell is the temperature: now the desolate desert inhabited by humans is scorching hot, warmed by billions of fires lit by demons and fallen angels. There is no repose for humans here, every waking moment is spent trying to escape demons or being tortured by them. Time is also pretty fucky in Hell, especially for humans! A single day on Earth can last a lifetime in Hell. Demons and fallen angels aren’t really affected by this (especially the most powerful ones) but humans can easily lose themselves in this. Humans in Hell could theoretically travel between the different layers, but nobody really wants to because Hell is shit and there’s demons everywhere. The demons that concentrate in the outer layer are the less sapient ones, little more than beasts roaming the lands and slaying human souls whenever they find them.

Demon tier A great sprawling city, absolutely chaotic, growing ever bigger with no rhyme or reason, as its inhabitants try to constantly expand their influence beyond its borders. Demons (and fallens) usually stay here but they’re capable of travelling between the various layers of hell, and they do so quite frequently to bother humans. Not so much to bother Lucifer though, he lives pretty isolated in the middle of Hell. Not that he minds. Anyway, the middle tier is where most of the action happens. Intrigues, backstabbings, alliances, they all happen here. Demons generally don’t like one another, so they’re always trying to kill eachother and gather more power. I guess humans-turned-demons also stay in this city, but I don’t really know if they even exist at this point. I’ll need to think about it.

Lake of ice (Lucifer is here) Innermost layer of Hell. It is said that after being cast out of heaven, Lucifer’s fall was so terribile that he got stuck into the ground, and that’s why he cannot move from the center of Hell. Despite the rest of his kingdom being a fiery inferno, the devil sits there embedded in a completely frozen lake, the ice reaching up to his chest. He cannot move or leave the place, but his Aspects (Satan, the Fallen etc. are kinda like his avatars) can move freely to get shit done for him. IMPORTANT: Satan, Lucifer and Fallen are essentially the same person. They’re kinda like a hive mind, with Lucifer controlling their bodies, but that’s not super important here. As said before, the center of hell is completely frozen over. Not even the fires from the demon city can reach there, in fact, demons actively refuse to come near their boss. Not that he minds, Lucifer doesn’t really feel the need for company, and through his Aspects he can perceive/feel whatever he needs. The city actually seems to move further and further away from him, with the oldest buildings constantly being abandoned in favour of newer ones further out. There’s not really much to say about here! It sucks. The only thing that could be considered “living” is Lucifer’s body, and that’s not really doing much anyway. I will say tho. When Judas went to hell (because he did) he ended up here. I’ll let you ruminate on that one.

The Bridge

There are multiple passages to traverse the Void but The Bridge is by far the safest one. That’s why it’s reserved to human souls! Constantly patrolled by angels, no demon could ever hope to get close to this place. When a human dies, their soul (made by god) gains access to the godly dimension thanks to their guardian angel reporting back to Azrael (archangel of Death) so that they can pass on. This process is almost immediate. Once dead, the souls finds itself at The Bridge. Which is exactly what it is, it’s a bridge baby! Souls need to cross it to get to heaven BUT the Bridge itself is a little finicky. The Bridge is a reflection of the human that will cross it, and it can drastically change in length and form. Eg: A virtuous soul’s bridge will be on the shorter side, look and feel like a normal bridge. A bad person’s bridge can stretch on into infinity, feel more unstable and maybe even be painful to cross. The Bridge can be made of fire, or blades, it can be a single rope dangling over the abyss, very easy to fall from. If a human soul falls from the bridge (it happens! Especially with very evil people, or the ones who think they don’t deserve heaven) they will end up in Hell. Someone might even choose to not cross the bridge at all and jump directly into Hell. So far, only Judas did. His guilt was so big that the Bridge didn’t even manifest. Time is also fucky in here too! A Bridge can be crossed in mere minutes or take years (even centuries!). Now, The Bridge is not the only way to travel through the Void! There are multiple passages on Earth, in Hell and Heaven, but they’re not as safe or guarded as the Bridge, and sometimes they might close or end up nowhere at all. The position of these passages is kept strictly secret, especially the ones that end in Hell, so that angels can use them to spy on demons. Using these passages takes a lot of energy too, so usually only the most powerful angels/demons can travel through the Void without problem. Travelling through the Void outside of the Bridge can be extremely fast or incredibly slow. It depends on how powerful the angel/demon is - Michael can blink through the Void in less than a second, while a less powerful angel could take more time. Very powerful angels/ demons can even create passages themselves! Another way the humans can travel through the Void is by falling off the Bridge, when they end up in hell. This passage is also guarded by angels and ends up at the Bridge anyway, so demons don’t really try to use it.

The Void

Okay the Void it’s pretty difficult to explain. It’s basically a big nothing into which all the dimensions float (kinda) and there’s absolutely nothing in it. While the other dimensions are, the Void is not. Like all the other dimensions, it is infinite, and occupies every space between Earth, Heaven and Hell, however big or small it may be. It’s not like the Abyss (that’s inside Apollyon) where all the residues of previous Creations are crammed inside a writhing to be let out, the Void is still. There’s absolutely nothing here to writhe, it’s a completely inert space. Or rather, there should be nothing. Something is stirring in the depths of nothingness, but nobody (just God Himself and Semjaza) really knows about it. That something is Delirium, although in the AU it doesn’t really have a name.

Delirium This might change in the future because it’s still a bit fuzzy around the edges, but basically Delirium is like a huge blob of unimaginable proportions that lurks inside the Void. It’s not sentient, or at least doesn’t have any real thoughts aside from existing in the Void and consuming to survive. Everything it touches gets destroyed and made into more Delirium, but in the Void there’s really nothing to touch so it just folds onto itself forever, not really doing anything. How did Delirium come to be? This part at least is decided: God’s Power of Creation is so strong that it reverberates through all dimensions, even the Void, bringing life where life shouldn’t exist (this is also why Lazarus keeps coming back: he was brought back to life by God, and His power is so big Lazarus’ soul can never stay dead). Delirium is basically the result of eons and eons of God making and remaking the universe: all that residual energy is still present, kinda like the Big Bang radiations. Important to note: Creation is a cycle! Gods makes the universe and then with the Apocalypse He resets everything and makes a new universe from scratch. The remains of the previous universe are locked in the Abyss (which is different from the Void!) inside Apollyon. Delirium is not any of these remains, it’s a completely new life form that was born out of the energy God uses to make and remake the universe over the millennia.

[mindovermuses]

Something has been tickling the back of my brain ever since we were given a glimpse of the gods in Downfall that I think is starting to come together into some sort of coherent thought process. But I'll we'll see how coherent it is once I've brain dumped it here onto the page I guess...

Most of the gods we've met are children.

Barely filtered ramblings ahead. You've been warned.

Go back and re-watch the opening of Downfall with them on Tengar. See how they run around and play like young children, naive to the world around them. How an elder of their race thought it such a fun thing to take Aru and any of their friends out to the orchard to witness a new tree coming into being. Is that an activity one would do with an adult or a curious child?

How, when Edun disappeared and the world started to disappear as well, other NPCs appeared at their sides, taking charge and telling them not to worry, they'll bring Edun back... before vanishing themselves. The gods/children had no understanding of anything that was happening but other, more mature-sounding characters seemed less lost in the moment.

The former god of death, Nahal, had probably just reached adulthood and that's why they could feel the dread the other adults seemed to sense and why they weren't running and playing. It's probably also part of why the Matron of Ravens was able to ascend to their godly position. Reaching full adulthood and understanding, maybe he chose to seek out oblivion and leave her as his chosen heir.

Given their timeless natures and how they were made into real, immortal beings... who knows how long it would take for them to emotionally mature, especially with no healthy adults of their kind there to guide them.

Can't you just look at some of their decisions and actions in the past and see the subtle nods to a toddler or young child playing make believe or not getting what they want and throwing a tantrum? It wouldn't be a one-for-one match to a child as we know them, but similar none-the-less.

Forsaking their godly abilities and living as humans for a while probably helped them to "grow up" more than anything else as well as finally accepting the Matron of Ravens as more of an equal. They learned first-hand how their actions and in-actions have consequences and that they had been speaking for and making decisions for life on Exandria without considering that they should have a say in things as well. Their puppet playthings are just as real as they are and are driven by the same emotions that they, as the gods, are.

I don't think the gods have fully reached adulthood for their kind just yet- some may be closer than others though. They're still, for the most part, those same scared little children in the orchard of possibilities watching everything they've ever known and loved be taken from them. Watching the only place they've ever known as home be swallowed up by something they didn't understand.

What happened may have been a completely normal thing for Tengar but not something they would have told young children about because they didn't believe they would understand yet. In a panic, the oldest of the children did their best to collect their siblings and escape what they saw as certain doom... but what if it wasn't? What if it was? No one can know for certain (except Matthew Mercer, that is...).

Maybe Predathos was the result of the adults of their world's hubris coming back to destroy them and THEY were the airship of children from Avalir or young Hallis from Aeor who were able to escape and survive the calamity their peoples brought down upon themselves. (Wonder if young Hallis grew up and studied necromancy while building himself a happy little spherical domain? Nah...)

Then again, maybe Predathos doesn't kill the gods it absorbs. Maybe it was a security system to protect Tengar and it sends them to be with the rest of their people and their lost home. Of course, if this is the case, there's always the possibility that perhaps, by choosing to become real to escape along with other later actions, they can no longer travel in those dimensions.

I mean... it's kind of like if fifth dimensional beings took form and became fourth dimensional beings. Gods amongst the peoples they presided over. For a short time, they constrained their potential further and became three-dimensional mortals, but their mortal forms couldn't hold their greater power indefinitely and they re-emerged as their fourth-dimensional selves. But, once you've shaved off enough of yourself to become mortal... how can you possibly ascend back to your former fifth dimensional forms to go home again?

TL;DR: The gods are literally children and potentially unreliable narrators of their own histories because of it.

[dykesynthezoid]

Do you notice the way men who think they’ve been “left behind” by feminism and the left deny their own agency while simultaneously denying the agency of others. Idk, maybe it’s real easy to make yourself out to be the victim when you’re actively keeping yourself in that cage. Nothing’s their fault, right, and by establishing themselves as someone who things happen to, who is somehow a purely receptive vessel for the rest of world’s suppose hatred, they also reject the idea of having any personal power over their own situation.

These are men complaining about feeling rejected and disempowered, while actively denying themselves the right to act like human beings whose actions have direct consequences on the world around them.

I think the major blind spot we’re looking at is a willingness to take responsibility.

Taking responsibility for one’s actions is, in reality, ego affirming. It reminds us that we have a fundamental power to affect the world and people around us. And thank god. No one wants to imagine what it would be like to leave no impression whatsoever— to be unable to alter our environment in any definable way. That is what a complete lack of agency would look like.

But in taking responsibility for the effects our actions can have on others, we tell ourselves a story where we do have agency. Where we do have power. And we can use it.

But men aren’t telling themselves that story. They actively deny themselves that agency. Which I guess isn’t a surprise considering so many men are used to denying themselves the right to act humanly. They constantly berate themselves, denying themselves the right to feel, the right to experience, the right to exist without self-judgement. And then they hold other men to that same standard.

We know these men don’t like themselves. If someone truly likes and trusts themselves, they will have no issue taking responsibility. This is because they know that they deserve the opportunity to grow and learn. They see the potential consequences of their actions and trust in their own resilience and sense of self enough to face them head-on. What does it say about your opinion of yourself if you cannot envision yourself weathering such consequences? How low must you see yourself to think that you could never rise to the occasion?

Men think the world hates them? Maybe that has more to do with how they treat themselves than they realize.

Of course these men only know how to blame others for their own supposed dejection. They’re literally the ones keeping themselves in a state of feeling disempowered. They are actively denying their own humanity. And if you’re denying your own humanity I’m sure it’s way too easy to deny everyone else’s too. The only reason to want to control everyone else, to want to take everyone else’s agency away, is if you can truly believe in your own disempowerment.

And also— when these men deny themselves agency, they’re denying themselves the right to connect authentically with the world around them. To be an active participant. I think deradicalizing these men isn’t just about them learning to care about something other than themselves; I think the care, specifically, denotes a feeling of connection, right. Shrimp guy liked taking care of his shrimp. He liked the active role it provided him to care for something. It made him someone who could act and respond in exchange with the world around him. Give and take. And from a grounded, stable sense of identity. “I am someone who takes care of this thing.”

Men can stop forcing themselves into a place of perceived powerlessness any time they want. They can leave the self-hatred victim cage at any time. There are even endless demonstrable benefits to them for doing so. So why are they still in there? Because it’s starting to seem like they just hate themselves enough to damn everyone else with them. They hate themselves and yet they get to decide that nobody else matters, either.

[contentloadingandstuff]

Hu Tao x Doctor!Reader

CW: Swearing, Male!Reader. I wonder who will catch all 4 references? Tips: One book, one comic book, one animation, one real life case. If someone does, they'll get a gold star from me! :D

I'M SORRY I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF-

What a pairing. The bright and sunny funeral director, Hu Tao, and the cynical but still good doctor Y/N. 

One benefits from ended lives, the other from saving them… This poses a fair amount of questions, doesn't it? 

No wonder, then, that you're not as popular as doctor Baizhu, especially with kids. Though honesty is usually considered a virtue, well… Let's say that it's not the case here. 

Though some call you a quack, Baizhu and Changsheng see the truth. You have good intentions, you have the necessary skill and knowledge, but all the years of not-so-casual field work desensitized you quite a bit. 

Y/N: Let me tie this, and we can begin.  Milelith soldier: Gods it hurts… Just… Just hurry, doctor. Please… I don't know if I can take it…  Y/N: Don't worry, my friend. You will manage, worst case you pass out. A leg is still better than your life, right?  Milelith soldier: I suppose…  Y/N: I learned from the best. My professor in Fontaine could make an amputation in just about 153 seconds, can you believe that? Truly impressive.  Milelith soldier: Oh… I see… How so?  Y/N: Impressive in the sense that it allowed the only case of 300% mortality rate to occur.  Milelith soldier: W-what does that mean?  Y/N: It's a funny story, let me tell you! A bystander died of a heart attack while witnessing the procedure, the patient later died of gangrene, and the saw cut off the fingers of the doctor's assistant, who later died of gangrene as well. That's skill, isn't it? Three for the price of one!  Milelith soldier: ...  Y/N: Well, not that funny. But don't fret, he saved more lives than he ended. Anyway, we'll take our time. Can't have any of you dying, can I?  Soldiers: *nervous laugh* Y/N: Here, bite down on this. And you two - hold him, just in case. 

Due to your skill in general medicine and surgery, especially the emergency variety, Ningguang deemed you to be a most valuable asset to Liyue. Putting up with your unsettling remarks and dark jokes is nothing when compared to all the lives you save regularly, especially among the Milelith and miners. 

Just… Why do you seem to actively try to undermine your fairly good public image? It's Hu Tao's influence, no doubt about that. 

Hu Tao: Buy a coffin, and the second will cost you nothing!  Y/N: But wait! Before you pass, take those pills to help with gas! 

The two of you are probably the most well-known couple in Liyue. Some find your complementary quirkiness adorable, while others keep a safe distance. Your demeanor may be unusual, to say the least, but the statistics speak for themselves - the essentially non-existent mortality rate of your procedures earns you respect amongst those you've helped. 

Some think of your sense of humor as harmful, but you'll hear the opposite if you ask your patients. A joke, even if it's gallows humor, can help immensely.

Hu Tao likes your sense of humor, though she can't help but worry a little. The stories are told in a funny way, but the topics are rarely such. 

Y/N: I have your test results, sir.  Old man: Please make haste, doctor. I don't have all day.  Y/N: Aw shucks, who told you? 

She understands how exhausting your profession is, how mentally challenging it may be. There are people you can't save, no matter how hard you try. There are those that can be, but they disobey your orders. If you make mistakes, you're always the one to blame. They rarely recognise your effort. More - some treat you as a fraud, a killer in disguise. 

Y/N: Have you heard of the surgeon's regularity, Hu?  Hu Tao: Aiya, do tell!  Y/N: If the patient dies, it's your fault. If they live, it's a miracle. 

Hu Tao loves listening to the many stories you've gathered over the years! 

The skill you hold in the field of medicine earned you the respect of many throughout the nations - commoners, aristocrats, generals, and even the Raiden Shogun herself. Due to your priceless service in the Shogunate's army, your Hydro Vision was never taken away, and you, even as an outlander, got the full freedom of movement and social rights in Inazuma. 

With your actions, you showed the Inazumans that a doctor isn't a coward. You attended the battles sometimes, standing alongside the other soldiers. They say it's bravery, but… Truly, the battlefield is the biggest test compound there is! 

Kujou Sara: Doctor! Are you sure this will work?  Y/N, firing up a Hydro beam: Hahaha, I have no idea! 

You finished med school in Fontaine, your homeland. You earned your license and started your career there, but you weren't very popular amongst the public and the officials. The reason? Well… 

Y/N: Ladies and gentlemen, have you wondered how you can serve science? Serve medicine? Serve mankind? Well, do I have an offer for you! In fact, we doctors are not sure how some things inside us humans work, and what we use can, at times, look like black magic, but rest assured - it's just ignorance. How can you assist us in making progress then, you ask? Sign this waver today! With a flick of your wrist you can donate your body to science and be the stepping stone for ground breaking progress! We'll crack you open after you kick the bucket, see what makes you tick, stitch you back up nice and tidy and give you back. Your family will get a compensation of 100 000 Mora. More - sign it now, ladies and gentlemen, and get a free wine voucher! Tell me, isn't that the offer of a lifetime? 

Anyway, that's how you lost your medical license. You were 'unprofessional', they said. 

After that you went to Inazuma, spending a year there before moving on to the land of wisdom. The researchers of Sumeru quickly recognised your experience, and looked into granting you an official license in an alternative procedure. Amurta professors were impressed by your ability to do your job with even the most bare-bones of tools, in harsh conditions, and succeed at treatment at the same time. 

Y/N, cooking up a rudimentary antidote: Don't stress, Y/N. It's just a tiny scorpion sting. Just a little life-and-death scenario. No reason to panic.  Eremite, choking: Doc… tor, that's n-not my name…  Y/N: Yeah, I know. 

While the paperwork was in progress, you visited Natlan for some time. It was the true unofficial test of your skills. Tropical diseases, the immense heat, the endless flood of combat wounds… But you just rolled up your sleeves and got to work, just like in Inazuma. 

Y/N: ... and I tell her: sorry, I can't treat you - I'm a family doctor, and you're an orphan!  Both: *laughter* Y/N: Whew… Anyway, that's why they kicked me out of the Teyvatian Association for Children's Medicine. Gladiator: Some folk can't take a joke huh… Um, doctor? Should I be awake for this?  Y/N: Haha, well… No. But since you already are, can you help me open up your chest cavity? I can't… seem… to…  Gladiator: *scream* Y/N: Oh, don't be such a Treasure Hoarder. Ribs grow back!  Gladiator: I don't think so… You sure, doctor?  Y/N: Yeah, if trimmed. You don't need it to survive. But that'll be another 75k.  Gladiator: Eh, do it doc. My insurance will cover it.  Y/N: I hope so! Else… *cracks knuckles*

The Akademiya offered you the place of the leader of an exchange project with The Fatui of Snezhnaya, due to your extensive experience in the field. You agreed, of course. In the land of Cryo you learned about gunshot wounds, frostbite and radiation poisoning (stemming from equipement factories), adding their treatment to your already long list of capabilities. The competition was possibly the biggest in Teyvat, since Fatui doctors and medics are the best money can buy. 

Electrohammer Vanguard: Job twoju mat’... Fuck… It hurts like a bitch… Y/N: Yeah, yeah, I know. A little quieter, please? A mistake now would be fatal. Electrohammer Vanguard: S-sorry… ugh… That’s my first gunshot, d-doctor… Y/N: Oh, don’t worry. Mine as well :) Electrohammer Vanguard: … Y/N: Now, can I get my hydrogen peroxide back? I hope you left some for the wound…

Mondstadt was pretty dull and boring. There weren’t nearly as many traumatic injuries as in the other nations, and the diseases weren’t even half as lethal as malaria, cholera and typhus you faced in Sumeru and Natlan. That moment of peace allowed you to reflect on your life and experiences, as well as finally enjoy your hard earned fortune. 

Y/N: Take two of those throughout the week. If the symptoms don’t let up, come back and I’ll give you stronger ones. Kaeya: Thank you, doctor. May I ask something? Y/N: Sure. Kaeya: How did you become a doctor in the first place? Was it the salary, or perhaps a moral reason? Y/N: Hm. Duty, I think. I do what needs to be done. I didn’t have much time to reflect on it before. There’s always something to do. But even if I complete what is necessary, I still think back to what I did. Long days of waiting usually follow. It will come out if the treatment works, or if the surgery was a success. And just then, when the tension and joy leave my body - just then I realize what are the odds. 1: 400 000. It’s laughable. But for everyone their life is everything they have, so perhaps trying makes sense. 

And so you ended up in Liyue, the last nation on your list. It wouldn’t be your final destination if not for her. In Hu Tao you found a soulmate, someone who shared your sense of humor, someone who understood you. 

Painfully aware of how limited your time among the living is, you and her make the most out of it. 

Thanks for reading!

[tamelee]

[link]

I’m pretty sure this is the appropriate amount of rage that occurs after visiting most Naruto-related subreddits (or otherwise) which is why I avoid them. Usually I’d read through it for you but I’m not in the right headspace now so I’ll just address what you’ve sent if that’s okay?

I’ve always found the notion of “if one of them was a girl…” pretty interesting and well, pointless. I mean… the Naruto-fandom in its entirety suffers from people arguing with- and for double standards. No amount of logic, critical thinking or analyses of the narrative makes sense to someone that is reluctant to accept anything other than what they believe is the norm. Not even the story itself. Especially because it isn’t marketed as something that actively represents something other than the readers would expect. That’s why I don’t think having Naruto and Sasuke intentionally kiss in the story would do much to change these deep-rooted core-beliefs. All it will do is force these people to reason with themselves in a way they can rationalize it (one of those: “Men calling women porn addicted has GOT to be the funniest thing I've seen all day.”) and I’m pretty sure romance still wouldn’t be considered— “unless one of them was a girl”. 

And well, I have many thoughts on that which I’ll spare you, but regardless… stereotypes, heteronormativity, media representation, implicit biases, culture and societal norms also play a role in people’s thinking which makes it all the more complicated, doesn’t it? Sasuke would’ve easily been accepted as the love-interest otherwise— as quickly as in Chapter 3. 

I’ve read a lot of contemporary YA lately because I have a very unserious personal vendetta against the book-whoever girlies that confidently try to explain literature while praising the most god-awful books in existence, but if one thing is certain… it’s that a lot of those romantic stories apply the very same tropes as the ones you can find between Naruto and Sasuke. Many of them are used to support a romantic relationship (as does everything else), yet… the possibility for romance is already an assumption anyway. 

“It got me so pissed I swear I hate dudebros and straight female fans 😡” 

Eh. I would be a bit more specific here. I don’t agree with this generalization. I get what you mean and I understand your frustration because many are homophobic for sure and aren’t afraid to get loud about it unfortunately. I mean… I make SNS art and am not too quiet about it either… so I receive a lot of this bullshit through asks, DM’s, tags or comments… though despite not being a fan or willing to accept the bond as romantic, there are many, MANY who appreciate the bond between Naruto and Sasuke regardless and I personally think that deserves some credit for what it’s worth regardless of who they are. (Yes, even dudebro's because I know some personally who are like that.) But anyway, nothing serious, just wanted to quickly note that. 

… what do Geto and Gojo got to do with it? Don’t tell me it’s the whole dialogue thing ><

[misc-obeyme]

I like to think that lilith's Angel DNA was still active or strong enough to last generations after generations. So if her Angel DNA got more thinner and thinner after generations, it would make sense for Mc to gain power AFTER forming some sort of pacts with the brothers.

This makes me wonder if Mc is the "special one" in her lineage to awaken this sort of power within themselves. If Mc had siblings, wouldn't that mean that Mc's siblings could also gain/awaken their power, too? Since they all share lilith's bloodline. Which could make some things very interesting.

I completely agree with you that Michael (or god) have their eyes on Mc considering how powerful they are (regardless of whether they're human or Nephilim). Maybe that's why Raphael was sent to the Devildom to keep one eye on Mc. Both realms are currently not at war, but i'm sure neither of them want that powerful being, aka Mc to become the others side weapon if something were to escalate. Maybe this is why Solomon once asked Mc to side with humanity instead. (I can't remember what lessons it was in NB).

Either that or they would try to get "ride of" Mc if they become too powerful and dangerous. and once more, according to biblical lore states that ridding the Earth of these Nephilim was one of God's purposes for flooding the Earth in Noah's time. So they have done it before.

Also, off topic but; You used to watch Supernatural?! Omfg, this brings back memories 😭

-Angsty Anon.

Oh dearest angsty anon. I did indeed watch Supernatural. I started watching while season 5 was airing. For many years, I was obsessed. Though it got to the point that I just watched out of habit because by the time I had invested in twelve or so seasons, I was like I'm gonna see this thing to the end.

Which is funny because I still haven't watched the end. One day, I will watch the last half of season 15. Who knows when it will be, but one day I'll do it. I also rewatched the first 8 seasons, but it's been a while.

Anyway, I think you can go with any of the options regarding the angel DNA. The game's canon on this topic is sparse so I really think you can just come up with whatever you want.

I hadn't previously considered the implications of MC's siblings. I suppose that's why I considered most of MC's power to come from their pacts and so on. My own MC has an older sister and I can't believe I never realized that she would also have some of Lilith's DNA. My MC's mom might, too!! Oh man I kinda feel like that has to be the case because it'd be really funny.

Sorry got a little off topic there. Raphael's cover story is that he's there to be the new exchange student, but I think his ulterior motives are to watch both Simeon and MC. And you know likely to report back to Michael about the goings on in the Devildom in a more general sense, too.

Does the Celestial Realm know about MC's heritage? I can't remember. Lucifer was keeping Lilith's resurrection a secret from his brothers, but I'm assuming nobody else knows? Does Simeon?? These details are eluding me.

I'm just wondering if that would matter to the CR, you know? Just another reason to keep track of MC is their angel DNA, right?

I wonder if they'd even be able to "get rid of" MC, even if they tried. It's hard to say since we don't know how powerful Michael or God/Father is. On the one hand, I would think MC's power would be off the charts at this point, but on the other hand well... that's God we're talking about, right? LOL.

Anyway, here's hoping no floods happen just to take out MC. We get enough of that from Lotan being summoned.

[dnangelic]

like it's just the way that outside of the BATB/POTO 'love what's ugly and ostracized' narrative itself cocteau was gay and everybody hated his gall about it, howard ashman was gay and had to conceal it and died of aids after finishing his work for disney's batb.... rather than have dark be homophobic and spitting in the face of his inspirational roots (the sole canon detail i can't stand) it's much much much more interesting for me to both read and write not someone who's meant to be a pervert (in humor) and an agape lover (in serious contextualization) only to turn and say 'no homo' to the crowd every single time but rather, instead of all that, someone who, simultaneously taking daisuke into account, is both extremely firm yet simultaneously insecure in the struggle to establish their identity not only in regards to themselves but also around others.

that applies to a lot, but i've been considering it especially in regards to dark's gender and daisuke's attractions. dark in my portrayal (while overall 500% nonbinary) is closer to someone bi-gender rather than agender; the feminine aspect to him isn't just theatrics, it's actively also part of his entirety to him, (compared to daisuke's passivity; the ten thousand canonical princess allusions,) and even if nobody ever recognizes it in a cognizant way, it is always, always there, the same way that erik blurs and obscures gender in leroux's novel (my second enormous inspiration, sugisaki's outright admitted primary) and sakurai occasionally discusses his relationship as both a performer and a person as well (my third enormous inspiration and sugisaki's secondary,) (see 1, 2.) simply put, the tragedy of (my!) dark does not ever derive from his being able to choose and sit comfortably and confidently with this sort of identity (in fact, it's one of the few things he can stubbornly, viciously decide for himself [alongside daisuke] as essentially a non-human, autonomous 'angel',) it's instead the way that his personality is so strong and 'anti-feminine' in the eyes of convention that said aspect of himself often gets disregarded for strictly masculine (and regardless, further self-contradictory and therefore isolating,) expectations.

dark himself alone does not care if others do not understand him; this is meant to be one of his far more admirable and impressive traits. he's staunchly independent: he knows who he is, what he's supposed to be, and he knows that if he actively presented himself more femininely (crossdressing to 'pass' essentially,) then people's behaviors WOULD be very likely to change around him, but he doesn't even do that because it goes against his overwhelming sense of pride. he never contorts, he never twists himself, what matters to him is that he and he alone understands himself and knows what he is, what he isn't. but he is, without proper support or acceptance, still alone. even bearing a strong character, the stifling loneliness and inherent, underlying self-sense of broken/wrongness of the 'other,' (god's luciferean problem child, the black sheep, the black-leather wearing punk,) is still inflicted on him. dark exists solely for himself, he exists solely for daisuke, which is simultaneously wherein the inversion and insecurities lie: if dark is canonically the live metaphor for all the aspects of daisuke's self that he attempts to and yet cannot possibly, conceivably repress, from his loves to his faults to his shames and his criminal sins as a thief, then the likes of daisuke's own personal confusions in regards to himself and his attempts at intimacy/socialization with others is the other, hidden side of dark's absolute self-confidence; it's every fear of perpetual isolation, misunderstanding, and abandonment for things outside of daisuke's own control.

queerness in relation to the self (transgender allegory) queerness in relation to others (non-hetero-romanticism) mental illness (depression, anxiety,) etc, etc, dark's thematic basis may at its most general simply be "a secret that feels wrong and that you feel you can't really tell anyone or else you'll get in trouble/won't be as liked as much" but it feels much better to give due respect to each of these primary roots.

[delusinalandpassionate]

My attempt to analyze Wishing Cairn EGO

Wish me luck

So Abnormality from which we get these EGOs called Pagoda Veneration or Tapdori, which is Korean tradition of walking and dancing around Pagoda, which is used to mark burial place of Buddha in circles. It was for veneration of Buddha in the beginning, but with time became a fun tradition for festivals(as I understood usually performed on April 1st)

However, instead of traditional pagoda, we see stone towers, which are like a more symbolic version of it, that people built by themselves wishing for good luck.

The figure that stacks these towers reminds us(and then is blatantly called in Yi Sang's EGO passive) Dol Hareubang, Stone grandpa, which is a type of rock statue found on Jeju Island. The exact reason for creating these statues is now kinda forgotten, but it's believed that they are gods offering protection from Demons. However, I could not find any connections between them and pagodas or wish towers, so if you know more, please inform me.

So, in Mirror Dungeon event, we see how this creature stacks stones, and we need to decide how to perceive them - as wish towers or cairn tomb.

But seems it's both

If we decide that it's wish tower, we can try to place a stone over making our wish(Sloth/Gloom check) and get Stone Tomb. Kinda interesting how we decided to consider it's an innocent wish tower, but in the end, it is still called "Tomb."

If we decide that it's a burial, we can try to bring down the cairn(Wrath/Envy check) and surprisingly don't find anything disturbing, only some money.

And I guess second choice is easier to analyze, in rightful Wrath we trying to save someone from being buried alive, sin makes sense.

But why is making a wish requires Sloth and Gloom? Well, my guess is that it symbolises passivity. Like, instead of doing something we just make wishes?

However, it's interesting that Yi Sang in his EGO that requires 4 Sloth and 1 Gloom to charge up, doesn't even make a wish. He seems more as a keeper of them, and in corroded condition asks to give him your wish " Speak unto me your wish...Vocalize your eagerness"

Don's EGO requires only 2 Sloth and 1 Wrath and 1 Pride, and in contrast with Yi Sang she's very vocal and active with her wish, announcing it and immediately following with action.

Wrath could be needed for sheer violence of her desires.

So Don is the one who makes wish, while Yi Sang is a person listening to it.

It's also interesting that his passive named after god-guardian, while Don's is "Fallen stone pagoda" which happens if we make a wish caressly or destroy on purpose. In her situation, I think it is the first option.

It also could explain why using EGO they gain weakness to gluttony. If they wish caressly and greedily, the tower will fall without fulfilling anything.

Gloom weakness could be about the danger of losing belief in power of wish fulfillment? Like if they start to doubt power of cairns, they won't work?

Like this fragilities forces them to balance between not losing trust in wishes and not overdepending on them. I feel like it makes sense.

So my conclusion is that Yi Sang resonated with this EGO because of his lack of active wishes. He's extremely passive in the beginning of the story, not really thinking about his own desires. So through this EGO, he tries to get some wishes

For Don it's opposition. She resonated with EGO because of large amount of her desires(remember our Don's core sin is glutton). So, with the help of this EGO, she tries to fulfill her own desires

[darlingpwease]

Yandere omega Hualian who keep get rejected by they alpha but still made they nest just for them to comfortable

fanciful

it depends enough on how dark the world of omegaverse is, especially at that time, but we will go for now with the most innocent without forced rituals and the like

♡ unhealthy behaviour, animalistic behaviour, dommale elements, mention of forced relationship if you squint

when you reject them, XIE LIAN and HUA CHENG are not very... happy. of course, alphas have the right to decide for themselves who they want and all that, but isn't it obvious that they will be the best options? one of them is the Supreme rank ghost, the other is one of the most powerful (if not the most powerful) God — even if it's a little difficult for them to have a baby, it doesn't mean they can't, and your instincts know it. when you have two strong and healthy omegas who are equally obsessive interested in you and are willing to put up with each other's existence as long as you don't forget about them, paying attention to everyone and not behaving with irrational favoritism towards only one.

HUA CHENG has a strong instinct to nest. maybe this is due to an anxious childhood, where the nest was the only place where he felt safe, but for him to nest regularly and create large nests is natural for all three, — especially considering that XIE LIAN has not shown such an active interest in building a nest since childhood, although after he was banned from Heaven the first time, he began actively making them in an attempt to recreate the same feeling as in his parents' nest.

moreover, your smells are mutually attractive, XIE LIAN has a pronounced parental instinct, HUA CHENG knows that even if you consider him unattractive, from a biological point of view, he can easily change his appearance and some shades of smell for greater attractiveness, they have many nests and beautiful things for you, while your personalities are compatible and your temperaments are in harmony — you have no reason to refuse them, but you do it anyway, behaving senselessly and mercilessly.

you deny them but they make a nest for you

... when they build a nests for you, it's more like an olive branch that they hold out to you, the denial of which has ambiguous but definitely very unpleasant consequences for you and for them (as if they care if they can't be your omegas) — a soft, large, fluffy, warm nest with a predominantly neutral smell but with inclusions their fragrances so that you know for sure that it was built by them. you know that they are watching your interaction and research, memorizing your reactions and behavior so that if you deny this nest, they will build a new and more suitable one.

if you deny the nest, making it clear that you did not like it, then next time you will get a more perfect and suitable one for you — and so it will be until you have nothing to complain about, looking at the perfect nest, and, in the end, giving up and settling in it. this will lead to the fact that they will create more such nests, using more and more of their clothes with a smell so that you have suitable associations, until, eventually, you begin to agree to make out with them in the nest.

if you continue to deny all the nests out of stubborn principle, or, even more so, try to break them, then, well, you knew what you were doing, doing this in front of the omegas who adored you, who could spend hours just to do it for you, — and the fact that they are both potentially stronger than you and definitely the two of them are stronger than one of you makes the situation even worse just for you...

you deny them but make a nest for them

XIE LIAN looks on, thinking before nodding. of course, it is — why would you build a nest for them if you don't make it clear that you think they are good enough, but just want more time to get used to them? this is logical and makes sense.

they sit in the nest, surrounded by your scent, and look at you with incomprehensible interest if you stay outside the nest instead of leaving them for a while, doing your business without their participation. your mixed signals are very confusing — do you refuse them, but at the same time build a nest? what's the point of that? — but then they get it while they're curled up.

... they're just courting, aren't they? — HUA CHENG is the first to raise this thought, and XIE LIAN looks at him with interest, finally finding the reason for your behavior. — they're just shy, but they're not really against us, since they build a nest for us and let us be in it. they just need time.

and they don't mind giving you that time — behaving even more gently and affectionately, trying to look like respectful and good omegas as your husbands. they become even more persistent, but in a gentle way, actively taking care of the house and about you, showing that choosing them would not be a bad step and that they are ready to do anything to be your omegas, since they adore you and you are the only one for them.

do you need time? they are ready to give as much as they want! after all, you are in any case already their alpha, who can only be with them and has already chosen them, so nothing else matters; they have been waiting for you for a long time, a couple more days or months do not matter as long as they can be near you...

[wickerfox]

HELLO YES ITS ME IM COPY PASTING THE THING HERE:

YOU JUST MADE THE CHILD IN ME BLOOM. THE QUESTION LIST (THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IM SEEING THIS AU BUT GOD FORBID):

× Who's Hoodie

× Is it in the same time setting as MH

× Who PLAYS AS ALEX

× Did it start the same way as a dumb school film project?

× From what I understood Scar takes the role of Tim, is bro a chainsmoker too LMFAO.

× Is Grian canonically gay too

× Would it be a wild correct guess that Amy is Lizzie and Alex is Joel since yk based from obvious plot points?

(before I start, placing this disclaimer here at the top since I have friends who don't frequent mcyt and might get confused, but when I talk abt this au I'm specifically talking abt the characters, not the content creators themselves. Anyway)

SO IM GONNA GO AHEAD AND SHARE WHOSE WHO FIRST

Jay- Grian, it made the most sense in my head, but I actually flip flopped on this so many times bc he also works so well as Tim or Alex, but at some point I went "wait it's an au, we can see how the story changes with Grian as the protag" so Grian's the protag now

Tim/Masky- Scar, I'm a transparent desert duo enjoyer and had a similar flip flop with him as I did Grian bc he'd also work as Jay but I was halfway through that drawing and had a similar thought process to the one i had abt Grian

Brian/Hoodie- Jimmy, I wanted to keep the cast focused to life series and evo members and he made the most sense to me lore wise, especially with the idea that in this au he was one of the ones with the earliest exposure to The Watcher (bc I love Canary Curse symbolism)

Alex- This one was the toughest choice bc no matter what a fav is going to loose it. Good thing this based on the Life Series! As much as I Love the idea of Joel and Lizzie as Alex and Amy, I actually went with Martyn. Again, the character is pretty involved with the Watcher Lore so it made the most sense as the character that is arguably most effected by it. (Although for a brief moment I considered Mumbo Jumbo bc,,, how fucking funny would that be)

Jessica- Jessica's gotta be Pearl right? It makes the most sense for it to be Pearl, I don't even need reasoning for this it makes sense

Amy- So who's Amy then? Scott actually! He's not Martyn's boyfriend in this, he's just a really good friend of his who was super involved in the production. Also like in mh, he's Pearl's roommate.

Sarah- Ren. Can't have a life series au featuring desert duo and not have some renchanting. Who else would be one of the leading actors in Martyn's short film?

Seth- Big B, again Evo connection made sense to me, and depending on your own personal theory on who the third person running the totheark account is, both Big B and Ren have interesting implications, even if both their rolls are p minor in this au

With the cast out of the way other questions !!!

It's set in a kind of nebulous time frame that's probably a little closer to present day, but it does still start with a student film project. When asked Why Martyn chose to use tapes he says something about wanting a more authentic feel to the film but in reality he just thought using tapes was a cool idea and doesn't want to admit that it's kind of impractical now.

In this au Scar doesn't smoke, but instead I like the headcannon that he just has boxes of candy/bubblegum cigarettes on him at all times. He'll pull one out, pause, and offer one to someone and when they say no he's just like "Okay, your loss" and watch as they get all confused when he starts unwrapping it asdfghkgkdjhfjsh

Is Grian gay in this au? Whose to say. (Real answer tho, I'm a notorious Jam shipper and while I'm not an active shipper when it comes to hermitcraft or the life series, I don't really mind it so the relationship is left kind of ambiguous)

But yes THANK YOU DO MUCH FOR GIVING ME A CHANCE TO TALK ABT THIS IVE BEEN RAMBLING TO MY FRIEND WHO DOESNT UNDERSTAND ANYTHING IVE BEEN SAYING FOR DAYS