#// also me: i'm very happy that ash won!

[voltagedoubler]

“Oh, Ash won! Congratulations, Ash!” Clemont exclaimed rather brightly with genuine surprise and happiness, grinning.

[fioiswriting]

Reunion | oneshot

Summary : After the Battle Above the Gods Eye, Daemon returned victorious. Aemond was presumed dead, though his body was never found. Three years later, you've mourned your former husband and are ready to move on. But it seems that some ghosts from your past have come back to haunt you, and that the dead aren't really dead after all...

[Part 2]

Rating : Explicit 18+, MDNI

Pairing : Aemond x Velaryon/Strong!niece!Reader, implied Cregan Stark x Reader (you can interpret them as lovers or not). Reader is Rhaenyra and Harwin’s daughter so I imagined her with dark hair like Jace, Luke and Joffrey but feel free to imagine her as you want of course <3

TW : unprotected sex, breeding kink, mention of characters death, angst, possessiveness, p in v sex, oral m receiving, praising kink, dom/sub undertones, mention of war, AU where the Blacks won the war, Alys Rivers (but no cheating), Reader has a child, grief, light choking, not proofread.

Words count : 7600

Author's notes : Hi everyone !! Sooo I’m posting my first ever fanfic on here, my first x reader and my first fanfic for Aemond. I’m very anxious haha But well, this fanfic is heavily inspired by a RP that has been going on for months with my wonderful gf <3 She writes Aemond so well I swear and now she’s making me fall in love with Cregan too haha oops whatever. Some of Aemond’s lines in this fanfic are hers so of course the credits go to her 💕 Long story short the reader’s backstory is inspired by my OC! The plot doesn't make any sense but whatever

Also English is not my first language, so sorry for the grammar mistakes !!

Enjoy 🖤

I don't know what I'm supposed to do Haunted by the ghost of you Oh, take me back to the night we met The night we met - Lord Huron

The snow had covered the landscape of Winterfell in a thin white layer so similar to ash, and the image tugged at your heart for a moment. Ashes. Fire. War. It was strange, the stillness that had followed the fury of screams and blood, of fire and ash, the constant anguish and pain of loss. It was like a long howl and then sudden silence. Life had resumed its course, the earth and the grass nurtured in red, as if nothing had happened, and that still irritated you sometimes, three years later.

For this peacefulness was a constant reminder of your life before. Before the war, before your own family ripped itself apart from within, before you lost him. There was something bitter in the thought that, in an alternate reality, you would have been happy with him by your side. The night brought its share of sweet dreams, lulled by the embrace of his arms, and you closed your eyes with ease, hoping to see his face again, which was fading day by day, desperately clinging to the details that made him.

It had been the best solution, you knew. 

For there was no reality in which he could live as much as you wished for. And you had accepted your duty by straightening your shoulders, silencing your heart, digging your thumbnail into the inside of your wrist. Your stepfather had said he was dead; he had seen Vhaegar fall from the sky, wounded.  He had seen the huge dragon crash into the water with all its weight. He had waited, and no silver hair had returned to the surface. He had searched and no body had been found.

So, he had returned, triumphant, with the conclusion that Aemond Targaryen was dead.

The room had swayed around you, but your fingers on the hard, rough wood of the table had kept you grounded. You had nodded, unsure, your ears ringing, your teeth sinking into the flesh of your tongue to hold back the tears that were beading at the edges of your eyes.

You knew it was inevitable, perhaps even fair. But it still hurt.  It sill fucking hurt.

Daemon had reassured you by pointing out that you were now released from your marital obligation.  A marriage to him that you had hoped for, waited for, dreamed of in your younger years. A marriage you had despised, once forced into, once made captive, a prisoner to be used against your own mother. And then a marriage that you had loved, cherished even, when he had opened up to you, when he had changed, when he had revealed that soft side despite his rough edges.  And you loved him, truly. The childhood love, the shy love that had blossomed between laughter muffled behind the curtains, hand-in-hand runs through the Red Keep and reading session hidden under the library table, had been rekindled.  Raw, devouring, bruised by war, but more powerful than ever.

Out of the corner of your eye you had caught a glimpse of the comforting gaze of your mother, the Queen, her gentle eyes searching for clues that would betray what you were feeling. It was she who had stroked your hair that evening, her presence welcome and soothing.

During the war, events had made you more uncertain than ever; blood and cheese had broken something in you. Suddenly shaken by the horrific actions of someone you hardly recognised, by the actions of your own family and the father figure who had raised you as his own daughter. You questioned your loyalties more than ever. Of course, you'd been devastated by Luke's death, your beloved little brother, so innocent, so sweet, and the despair you'd felt, the sadness, had gradually turned to anger. 

Your desire for revenge had fed on your rage, on your anger.

And in your quest for revenge, you had grabbed the dagger hidden in your bodice when you had kissed him, when you had poisoned him with your lips and your body pressed against his. Perhaps it was cowardice to do it on your wedding night, right after the pitiful ceremony in which you had been forced to exchange your vows of fidelity, the humiliation of the white, blue, red and green cloak around your shoulders.  Perhaps it was cowardice to wait for him to surrender to your touch, hard with desire, before plunging the blade straight into his heart.

But you didn't do it, in the end, the humiliation of your failure burning in your cheeks, and you had seen the horrible reality in the icy eye fixed on you: he was expecting it.  He knew. He had anticipated you, as usual, one step ahead of you, ahead of your plans. And the humiliation was all the more bitter.

First he had defied you, knowing full well that you couldn't do it, despite your momentary hesitation. Then he had wiped away your tears, the sound of metal echoing off the floor as he captured your lips with his own. 

And both you and he had sought to release the accumulated tension in the comfort of your naked bodies, in the rough, demanding thrusts.

You weren't quite sure when your relationship had changed. When he had become more forgiving. When he had trusted you. When he had become gentle. When you had felt him slipping away, subtly, almost imperceptibly. When you had begun to seek comfort in his arms, to seek the warmth of his body, to seek his love on his lips.

You loved him.

So you spent the nights lying awake in fear. Fearing the moment when you would have to make a choice. Fearing the moment when you would have to betray.

Which side would you choose when both armies were coming towards you, carrying the same flags, the same weapons, both calling your name?

Anxiety had spread its roots in the pit of your stomach, crescent moons in the palms of your hands. You felt as if you were losing your mind.

But the choice had been forced upon you without you having to make it. You had accepted it, as your duty demanded, as your loyalty to your family demanded.

Life at Winterfell wasn't so bad, quite the opposite in fact, despite the cold and snow you weren't used to. Cregan Stark was a good man. He had given you time and space to grieve, and had opened the castle gates to you with kindness. You had decided that you could get used to the cold and the snow, to the stone and the rustic wood, so different from the refineries of the capital, but infinitely warmer.

It was your choice, your departure for Winterfell.  Dragonstone was still haunted by the ghost of Luke, by the ghosts of Joffrey and little Aegon and Viserys and Rhaenys and all the family members you had lost.  King's Landing was haunted, too. By your sweet aunt and her cries of despair, by Aegon's descent into madness, by the humiliations you had so gracefully endured, by the recurring announcements of deaths, by the smell of the innocents’ blood, by the pitiful looks of Alicent, who had seen in you the image of herself a few years earlier, powerless and manipulated.

But above all, it was haunted by him.

The weight of the memories had become unbearable and you needed to leave.

You chose Winterfell, hoping the cold would help you forget. And Jace had come with you, his thumb caressing the back of your hand with affection, always the protective, reassuring big brother he was to you.  Probably glad to see his friend again, too. Your friend, to both of you.

But forgetting was something you'd never really been able to do, even less with the last memory he'd left you.

Now, just over three years later, you felt ready to return to King's Landing to visit your parents, to face the demons of your past and to mourn once and for all. It was inexplicable, perhaps a little strange, but you felt the need to go back.

On his first dragon ride, Rhaegar clapped his hands along the way, nestled into your arms in front of you, closing his eyes as the wind ruffled his dark curls. Midnight, your dragon, as pleasant as ever, as easy and gentle as ever, took care to be careful with the two of you on his back.

When you arrived, Rhaenyra hugged you as tightly as she'd ever hugged you, her nose buried in your thick hair, before bending down to take her grandson in her arms.

"I've missed you, sweet girl." she said to you. You smiled and reached for her arm, glancing at your son who'd grabbed one of your mother's long silver curls: "Daemon has missed you too. You know he doesn't show his feelings, but... he missed you." 

You smile, your eyes dropping to the floor.  You missed them, too, terribly, despite the frequent letters.

"And of course... we’ve missed you too, little one!" Rhaenyra added, catching the child's nose with her thumb and forefinger, causing him to burst into laughter.

It felt good to be back.  It was good to have regained some sort of routine in your daily life with your family. It was good to see the walls of the Red Keep return to their original familiarity, chasing away the ghosts you feared you might see again.

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

Perhaps you should have listened to your stepfather and not stray under any circumstances from the knight who has been following your every step with concern, afraid to lose sight of you. 

Five years earlier, it was Sir Erryk's vigilance that you had deceived when you had carelessly followed your eldest uncle into the dangerous streets of the capital.

The streets of King's Landing offered you a freedom you had missed. But now you almost regret sneaking through the crowds to escape the vigilance of the knight who had escorted you. You decide to take a shortcut, the hood of your cloak pulled down over your forehead.  It must have been your imagination.  You aren’t on the worst side of the city, not like five years ago, and the streets have become safe, much safer now that your parents are in power.

Your footsteps led you to some stone steps, which you climb at full speed, your heart pounding in your chest.  Glancing behind you, you disappear like a shadow around the corner of an alley, but the feeling is still there. You feel as if you are being followed.

At the Red Keep you already had the unpleasant feeling of being observed. In the gardens, with your son. Along the ramparts, enjoying the sea breeze on your face.

But you blamed it on your body's automatic response to the anxiety that had built up in all the years you'd spent within the walls of the Keep.

You slow your pace as you spot the dome and towers of the Great Sept at the end of the alley. From there you can easily find your way back to the Red Keep. All you had to do is keep moving, staring ahead, pressing your pace, wrapped in the thick wool of your cloak.

One step after the other. Breathing deeply. Half-moons in your palms.

The Great Sept growing closer give you a strange kind of reassurance.

And then suddenly, one hand closes over your mouth, the other around your waist. Your back bangs painfully against the cold stone wall of the winding alley into which you have been dragged. Fuck. Fuck.

You are too paralysed to struggle, too paralysed to bite the hand of the stranger holding you prisoner between the wall and his own body.

"You obviously learned nothing from my advice, Lady Strong," the icy voice whispers in the hollow of your ear. Your eyes widen. 

That voice. It couldn't be.

Lady Strong. Lady Strong. Lady Strong.

It can’t be.

That is your sick mind playing tricks on you again.

"As reckless as ever, hm, aren't you? You could easily get yourself killed."

The stranger releases you and you look up again, tears forming at the corners of your eyes, searching for that icy blue, tinged with lilac, that have read through you so many times before.

It is impossible.

He has died three years before, falling from Vhaegar's back into the deep waters of the lake at Harrenhal.

Is it a ghost? Is it a hallucination?

"You are dead. You were dead," you whisper, more to yourself than to him, still in shock from the feel of his body against yours. You feel the tears that have formed at the corners of your eyes roll down your cheek, and your little fists pound his chest.

You have so much to say to him. So many things to reproach him for.

His hand cups your cheek to turn your head and force you to look at him, his thumb wiping away your tears. 

The way he looks at you hasn’t changed; it still makes you shiver. You still feel that your uncle could read through you, that he could discover your deepest secrets.  And there is still that hint of desire, too, that gleam in his one seeing eye.

You want to kiss him. You want to slap him.

He clenches his jaw as he pulls you against him, burying your face in his chest, his arms around you. He rests his chin on your head. One of his hands strokes your dark hair as you stifle sobs into the wool of his cloak.

The situation takes you back to your wedding night, when he had comforted you in the same way after you had told him that you couldn't hate him, even if you had tried.

"I know," you hear him whisper, the vocal cords vibrating from his throat against the top of your head.

He is standing there, in front of you. You cling to the fabric of his clothes with all your might, as if you're afraid he'll slip away again.

"How?" you ask, eyes closed, head against him. If he is to be taken from you again, you intend to enjoy every moment in his company. 

He clenches again. You step back to look into his eyes, to search his enigmatic gaze for answers, for clues, for signs that would explain how. Why.

He doesn't answer you, but he is filled with desire as he grips your chin between his middle and index fingers, as he captures your lips with his own. You rediscover the possessiveness you've been missing. He pushes you a little harder against the wall behind you, as if to remind you who you belong to. Who you were married to.

A familiar warmth blossoms between your thighs, a warmth you haven't felt for too long. You're trapped, right there, your uncle towering over you, trapped between the wall and his body. His fingers close around your jaw and you kiss him back hungrily, wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him closer.

You're perfectly aware that the situation is surreal.  You're perfectly aware that you're making a mistake, that you shouldn't respond to the kiss of the man who used to be your husband, not when he's technically still your enemy, not when he's technically dead. 

But you shut out the voices in your head begging you to stop.

"I still want to hate you, you know," you breathe between his parted lips. He merely mutters hm in reply, trying to shut you up again, his hands wandering under your cape, tracing the ribs of the body he'd missed so much. He reaches for your waist, your hips, which he grabs meanly. 

There's no one in the alley around you, but the hood over his head hides his long silver hair anyway. 

"Three fucking years." Your lips leave his, a mixture of anger and desire bubbling up from your lower belly. Aemond stares at you, his jaw clenched. He knows you need to unleash your emotions when you don't read an ounce of regret in his gaze. "Three. Fucking. Years. And you've told me nothing. You never sought to -"

"I couldn't," he retorts harshly. He seems to be searching for words to explain something you could not possibly understand, but his gaze does not soften. You know he needs time, you've learned to know him.  You've waited three years, what's another moment? But you're tired, and your patience isn't as strong as it used to be.  You look away, a mocking laugh escaping your lips as you repeat his justification. "You couldn't." 

"And risk your mother executing me?" He forces you to look at him again, and you feel the lump form in your throat. You know you are perhaps being unfair, but you were alone for those three years while you mourned him, so alone, and in a way, you want to make him pay.

"You were dead to me, qybor." Uncle. You feel him twitch at the mention of your family tie, at the nickname he used to love to hear on your tongue. "I had to live with the idea that you would never come back."

The tears that had dried on your cheeks threaten to flow again, pooling at the corners of your eyes. Aemond sighs. 

"I thought I was dead too," he whispers. You can feel the tension in every one of his muscles. There's a moment of hesitation, a silence that hovers between you.  You have so many questions, but you don't know where to begin.  Not a sound leaves your lips.

"She tended to my wounds," he adds, and you frown in confusion. "Alys."

Alys. You try to wriggle out of his grip, but he keeps you pinned to the wall.  Alys, you remember the rumours whispered in your ear by that rat of Larys - those false rumours, you remind yourself -  but you can't help feeling your heart clench.  You don't trust your voice enough to speak, to say anything.

"There's no one left in Harrenhal but her," he adds, as if you need that clarification, as if you need to know where he's been all this time. 

You say nothing. Your throat is tight. If you speak, if you look at him, you'll cry again and betray your feelings all over again. You refuse to make a fool of yourself, not now.

"She's the one who saw you. In Winterfell." There's a hint of bitterness in his voice as he mentions the place where you've spent the last few years rebuilding yourself, trying to forget him.  A bit of anger, perhaps, too.

"Cregan Stark welcomed me indeed," you reply curtly.  Perhaps you want to hurt him as he hurt you, but you are deliberately vague in your answer. "I have mourned you, qybor."

Everything is so confused in your mind.  A paradoxical blend of desire, anger, sadness, jealousy.  Of love too.

You want to strangle him and melt on his lips at the same time, and you know that after all this time you should be used to feeling this paradox of emotions with Aemond. Your uncle was a set of contradictions all his own.

"I saw you. On Midnight. That's how I knew you were here."

You nod. Words don't work between you, you know that. It has always been like that; the habit of letting silence speak more than words. The habit of communicating through the carnal acts of your bodies against each other. *** *** *** *** *** *** *** ***

Aemond pushes you against the wooden door as soon as you enter the mediocre room of the inn. He is demanding, more than ever, as his hands run along your hips to your thighs to lift you up and press you against the door, your legs closing around him. He watches you with hungry eyes, like a predator ready to pounce on its prey. You can't stop a moan from escaping your lips. 

There's something feverish, passionate, urgent about the kiss. And when his tongue begs for an opening, your lips part to welcome him. There is only you in this room, an interlude where nothing else exists, where you don't have to worry about your duties and loyalties, where you are guided by nothing but passion.

His hand slams against the wall next to your head and with a movement of his hips he lifts you a little higher onto his waist, your legs locked tightly around him. He grunts into the crook of your neck at the friction of your crotch against his.

"Tell me to stop." His hand which isn't against the wall to support your weight slides up to your jaw. He lifts your chin, his gaze locked in yours, searching for clues, anything that would betray your desire to end whatever it is you're doing. "Tell me to stop now, or I won't be able to."

You don't want to stop. You should, you know you should, but you silence the little voice in your conscience that's begging you to pull yourself together, to end it all before you've even started, before you've even gone too far, and you kiss him with more vigour, with more fervour.

"I'm not going to tell you to stop, qybor," you whisper against his lips. "You know that."

His hardened member twitches beneath you at the mention of the High Valyrian, at the mention of that nickname he's so fond of. It's his weakness, you know, and despite the three years he's been away, he hasn't changed.

It's so good to feel him against you again, to feel his lips against yours, along your jawline to the junction with your neck. In one sharp movement, he rolls his hips to meet yours, pressing you a little harder against the wooden wall, and he catches your moan between his lips.

You know that tonight there will be no shy touches between you, no awkward explorations like in the early days of your love, when it wasn't tainted by war, blood, and death yet. You and he will both be consumed by the burning fire of passion.   You both need to release that tension and frustration, to make up for lost time, to drown, drunk with desire, in the most carnal of acts. All that matters now are his hands on your body to ease the pain pulsing between your thighs, the desperate need to feel him inside you. 

The barrier of your clothes frustrates you. You need to feel his skin against yours, to feel all of him, and your hand runs down his body to pull at the cord holding his breeches together. Immediately his fingers close around your wrist to hold you back. He wants to be in control, you know. But it has been three years and something about you just isn't the same.

"Let me worship you like I used to, qybor," you whisper against his lips, your forehead pressed against his, and you feel his jaw tighten. There's a moment of hesitation in his eyes, clouded by desire.

His thumb caresses your lips, pressing against your lower lip. You part them, just enough for the tip of your tongue to wet the top of his thumb. There are no further words exchanged between you, just silence, punctuated by your gasping breaths. His hand closes around your throat, not pressing too hard, just enough so you can feel the weight of his palm against your windpipe, just to remind you that he's in complete control of the situation.

Fuck, you've missed it; the adrenaline of his hand around your throat, the adrenaline of knowing he could do anything to you and you'd be defenceless.

"On your knees then."

The command echoes through the room and you feel the wetness seeping between your thighs as you slide to your knees in front of him. Your eyes shine with envy and you look up at him as you did years ago. You know he can't resist the angelic look on your face when you're between his thighs. You know he can't resist the dichotomy between the innocent look on your face and the sinful act you're about to commit.  He revels in your submission, and that's something you've learned to use against him.

Your uncle releases his cock from his breeches, his hand wrapped around the base, and the desire you feel between your thighs becomes more and more unbearable. The head is already glistening with anticipation, white pearls beading at the slit, and it takes all of Aemond's self-control not to grab you by the hair and force himself into your mouth entirely. 

Closing the distance, he rubs his member against your lips to spread the wetness before pushing into your mouth. Your lips close around him. He's warm and heavy on your tongue and the hand holding the base of his manhood is replaced by yours to cover what you can't take. Your tongue curls around the tip first, absorbing his salty taste, and you look up at him through your long lashes. He doesn't look away from you.

His hand cups your cheek, his thumb caresses your cheekbone before sliding to the corner of your lips, just where his length disappears between them. It's as if he's hypnotised by the spectacle, by the bobbing of your head, by your hollowed cheeks, by your application and devotion. 

His hands leave your jaw and sink into your thick curls, urging you to take him a little deeper, and he thrusts between your lips with more vigour. You close your eyes, concentrating on not choking as his member touches the back of your throat. You take it as diligently and assiduously as ever, ignoring the tears gathering at the corners of your eyes.

"That's it, just like that. Such a good girl, mandianna [niece], such a good wife," you hear him grunt, his movements more erratic, more jerky, and you revel in his praise, sending a new wave of heat between your thighs. "Only for me."

You feel him throb on your tongue. You know it won't be long now, and you prepare yourself to welcome him, to let the salty taste of his seed flood your tongue, but your uncle pulls back reluctantly. 

"I would rather not waste." he whispers, his eyes riveted on the thread of saliva that connects your lips, glistening with saliva and precum, to the tip of his cock. You shudder. Aemond definitely hasn't changed much, you realise.

His hand finds your cheek again and he caresses your lips to spread the mess you've made by sucking him. You know he isn't finished. This is just the beginning and you're both driven by the consuming hunger of passion. You know what's coming now, your core clenching around nothing, and you rub your thighs together, in an attempt to soothe the impatience. 

He urges you to stand. He has that predatory look in his eyes as he closes the distance between you with his determined steps. 

" Undress," he orders, and you do not take your eyes off him as you untie the linen dress you had put on to disguise yourself as a common girl.

The garment falls heavily to the floor, forming a grey puddle at your feet, and you take a step forward.

"Do you not like seeing me dressed in rags, qybor?" you ask in a playful tone, teasing, referring to the time, years ago, when he had rescued you during your adventurous walk along the grim Silk Road where your uncle Aegon had accidentally led you. 

The memory was so close and yet so far away.

Aemond takes a step towards you, his hand brushing aside the long hair that hides your breasts to tuck it behind your shoulder.

"Not when you are meant to be my Queen." His eye glow with desire. He studies your body in detail as his fingers slide down your collarbone to your breasts. His thumb traces their underside before moving up to your nipples, hardened by the cool evening air and desire. He plays with them, eliciting a moan that satisfies him.  He looks at you like one looking at a prize, a long-awaited gift.

"Three years away from my beautiful wife," he whispers, his good eye gleaming as he looks at your breasts.

"You did have pleasant company in Harrenhal though, didn't you?" you hiss through your teeth and Aemond's hand suddenly closes around your throat to make you swallow your insolence.  You're not afraid, not anymore, for you know he won't hurt you. You have this power over him and it's delicious. 

His face is so close to yours that your noses are touching. 

He doesn't let go of you. 

"It wasn't like that." He whispers. "With her." You know he's sincere because he's almost awkward with his words, his explanation. You can see in his eye that there are so many other things he would like to tell you, but you have learned not to rush him.  It has always been difficult for him to open up, to be vulnerable.

His fingers release you. Aemond is a good head taller than you, and as he puts a hand on your shoulder, moving forward to force you back until your knees hit the mattress, your eyes remain fixed on his. 

Your uncle lays you down on the mattress. It's not the comfort of the bed you once shared, but you don't care, you just need him inside you. 

You need him to make you feel whole again. Aemond was fire, and you were willing to burn for him.  You had always burned for him.

In the candlelight of the small bedroom where you spend the night, you see his thumbs slip under the waistband of his breeches. His clothes quickly join yours on the floor.

There's something soothing about the weight of his naked body on top of yours. Once under him, you know you can surrender completely to him and stop thinking, just stop thinking.

His lips on yours, his hands on your body, his broad torso eclipsing your smaller figure.

He places kisses down your neck to your collarbone, sucking your skin between his teeth to leave purple marks that will blossom tomorrow. 

He kisses your breast, his lips closing around an erect nipple which he sucks gently, then around the other.  Your hands are buried in his long silver hair.  You can feel how wet you are between your thighs. You need him desperately, right there.

The confidence with which his fingers slide down your waist, from your hips to your inner thighs, only emphasises his ravenous expression. His touch on your folds sends a wave of heat through your body, causing your hips to move against his hand. Softly tracing the curves of your crotch, his index and middle fingers finally part your folds to collect the wetness that has formed there.

"Is it sucking your husband's cock that has got you so wet? 

Yes, you want to answer, seeking more contact, but the words are stuck in your throat.

"Stay still," he orders in a hoarse voice as you move your hips, his hands gripping your hips to pin you back against the mattress. 

You comply, for once, because you know he won't give you what you want otherwise. And you can't wait any longer, not today, not when you thought you'd never feel his warmth against your body again, his hands on your hips, his cock inside you.

"You see, you can be a good girl." His voice is softer when you obey. And to reward you, his fingers slide to your entrance, where he applies a little pressure with the tip of his middle finger without actually penetrating you. "Now beg your husband to fill you."

"Please, qybor," you murmur, your hand taking his cheek to bring his face to yours. You want him to look at you. "Please, I need you inside."

Oh, the slowness and precision with which his finger plunges into you makes you throw your head back. He begins to move back and forth, his index finger joining his middle one, caressing your spongy walls, his thumb tracing circles around your bud. Curling his fingers, he strokes that spot inside you that makes your legs tremble and you clutch the sheets beneath you.

You feel your centre tighten around his fingers, the release you've been looking for so close, so very close. You shut your eyes, ready for the familiar wave of warmth to wash over your entire body, but your uncle pulls his fingers away. You grunt in frustration.

You open your eyes only to see Aemond bring his fingers to his lips indecently, spreading your wetness over his own lips. "You still taste so good," he purrs, and you feel the blush rise to your cheeks.

He leans over to kiss you and you taste yourself on his lips. It's indecent.

He pulls back and you see him wrap his hand around his hardened cock, the head angrily red and already drooling in anticipation. He guides himself to your core, rubbing his length between your folds, coating it with your glistening juices. 

The round tip of his member enters you, slowly at first, stretching your narrow entrance as if to give you time to adjust. Aemond pushes and he sinks easily into you until he's fully seated, your warm, wet walls feeling heavenly around him, squeezing him just right.

" You are so tight," he growls against you as your arms close around him, your legs bent and pressed to either side of his body. 

He gives you a moment to get used to having him inside you again, to feeling him so deeply. It's exactly what you need; he stretches you deliciously, with a perfect touch of controlled pain.

You feel whole again and you want to cry.  You never want to lose that feeling. You want to keep him, against you, inside you.

You close your eyes and bury your head in the hollow above his shoulder, clinging to him as if to feel him more deeply, more intimately.

"You can move," you reply, rolling your hips to support your words. Aemond's hand immediately presses down on your stomach to hold you against the mattress and you bite your lower lip, almost guilty of forgetting his earlier command. He always has that need to control. He's the one who decides, you should know it after all these years, and you should stop being so demanding, so desperate.

"I said stay still," he scolds you, and the waiting is unbearable. 

You need him. 

When he finally pulls out and thrusts into you again, you let out a whimper. Your nails dig into the pale skin of his back, leaving crescent marks that will probably still be there the next day.

Once under him, Aemond has the ability to make you vulnerable, and part of you hate him for it.

"You take me so well," he growls after a particularly brutal thrust. "You're such a good girl."

The praise is sweet music to your ears.  You have always needed it, to be praised, complimented.

You feel him hitting that special spot deep inside you, you feel him pressing in so deeply and your grip tightens around him.

"Did you miss me?" you whisper in a voice made weak by pleasure, but all you get in return are the hoarse grunts of his voice.

Aemond lowers his eyes to look at where you are joined, hypnotised by the sight of his cock disappearing inside you. The rhythm he imposes is powerful, deep, and his fingers find their way between your bodies, reaching your little bud at the top of your folds to trace circles on it. You won't last long and he knows it as he feels your walls tighten desperately around him. Your moans grow louder.

"Look at me." His voice barely brings you back to reality, even though your mind is already far away, even though you know you can't last much longer. Painfully, you open your eyes to meet your uncle's icy gaze. " I am going to fill you up." His pacing becomes more erratic, more sloppy, and you know he won't last much longer either. Leaning on his forearm, he continues to stroke your pearl in small circles. "I am going to fill you up and you're going to take it all."

The image of you, belly round with his child, haunts him.  It never stopped haunting him, even on the brink of death, even when he thought he'd exhaled his last breath as he fell into the icy waters of the lake, his heart clenched with regret and remorse. It still is a wonder that he has survived. Perhaps, just perhaps, the Gods still had plans for him.

I'm going to fill you up. Words like that shouldn't bring you to ecstasy, and yet they do. Aemond reaches deeper, and as he feels your whole body convulse with the spasms of your orgasm, he joins you in your release. He spills his seed deep inside you before remaining still, buried against your womb, enjoying your warmth, making sure he's pouring every last drop into you. 

He doesn't want to pull out, not yet, and you close your arms around his neck, your breast pressed against his chest as he softens inside you.

The weight of his body on yours is comforting.  For the first time in years, you feel alive. For the first time in years, the open wound he left seems to be healing.

When he pulls out, you wince at the sensation of his cock slipping between your still too sensitive folds. You immediately miss the feeling of fullness. 

You barely move, your whole body still sore from your lovemaking, but you can feel his cum leaking from your entrance onto the mattress below.

Again, Aemond's fingers are between your thighs that are glistening with the intimate essence of both of you, collecting his own seed and pushing it back into you.  You whimper, still too sensitive, your lips brushing against his, and he remains inside you for a brief moment. He wants to make sure nothing is wasted.

And when he withdraws his fingers, he presses them against your lips for you to clean them.

You snuggle up against him, your head against his chest. Your hand caresses his chest, the fine line of his muscles, and he rests his chin on the top of your head, wrapping an arm around your waist to hold you close. You enjoy the warmth of his body while you still can. Between your thighs you feel the sticky sensation of his seed mixing with your wetness as it still flows out of you, but you don't want to leave the embrace of his arms.

"I saw you in the gardens. With the child."

When you feel his throat vibrate, you look up at him, your eyebrows furrowed. "It was you, then?" You swallow. "It was you watching me." It's more of an observation than a question, and you suddenly understand that constant, uncomfortable feeling of being watched. At least you weren't crazy. 

He lets out a hm and pauses.

"Is he yours?"

You know where this question is leading. You fear the moment of truth.  You'd deluded yourself into thinking you could avoid it, but you were naive; did you really think you could hide the truth from him for much longer, now that he was back?

"Yes." You answer, looking away. You're nervous, and he can feel it.

"He's Cregan Stark's son, isn't he?"

Your heart clenches. You hesitate for a moment. You should lie.  You know you should lie.  To protect your son and your family, as you've protected them for the past three years.  You only need one word.

You hear him sighing beneath you, taking your silence as confirmation.

"No, he's not." 

The words leave your lips before you can even stop them. You hold your breath. Beneath you, Aemond tenses. He straightens, puzzled, silent.

"A bastard, then?" His voice is dry, almost mocking, revealing a form of irritation. "I did not expect this from you, dear niece." Disappointment.

You feel anger boiling inside you at the thought of him insulting your son, your sweet boy you love so much. You swallow the lump that has formed in your throat and rise on your forearms, your eyebrows furrowed as you turn your hard gaze on him.

You don't know how to express the words that are desperately trying to escape your lips. 

" He has blue eyes," you add, and you can see the confusion on his face. A lock of hair slips from your shoulder and falls around your face. "Your blue eyes."

You feel him tense up. He says nothing, just stares at you with his one seeing eye.  It's rare to see Aemond Targaryen so unsure of himself, so full of doubt. He stares at you as if he's afraid he's heard you wrong, as if he's afraid he's invented the words that have come out of your mouth.

"What did you say?"

You look away. You bite your lower lip, regretting your words.  You want to bury your face in his chest. You breath. 

"He is your son, Aemond." You finally admit it.

It's true that Rhaegar's brown curls could easily make him look like a Stark. Cregan had offered to raise him as his own, and you had smiled at his kindness.

Rhaegar is so much like you. Like you, and like Luke, and especially like Jace as a child, of whom he is the spitting image. He has the soft features of your face, but his eyes make him undeniably Aemond's son.

Your uncle holds you close, his arm wrapped around your waist, his long nose buried in the hollow of your neck, breathing in the scent of your hair.

"My son," he repeats in awe.  It's rare to see Aemond smile with sincerity.  Especially after the war has worn him down, made him more ruthless than ever.

"His name is Rhaegar," you say. "Just as we discussed." There's shyness in your voice.

He straightens, you on top, straddling him, and he seeks your lips to kiss you fiercely. His desire awakens beneath you; you feel him harden against your core again.

And this time, he makes love to you.

*** *** *** *** *** *** *** *** 

"I missed the best part." He purrs against you, his hand absently caressing your breast before sliding down your body to rest on your flat stomach, just above where your womb lies. He clenches his hand possessively over your flesh. His voice is almost tinged with regret. Your hand rests on his.

"You shouldn't have left me," you reply, bitter. Deep down, you're still angry with him. Your gaze falls on your stomach, where both your hands lie, yours on top of his, clasped together. "You shouldn't have let your anger dictate your actions," you add, looking away. "But you were blinded by your desire for revenge, by your desire to prove that you could be better than him.” You swallow.

It is his fault, after all, that he missed your son's birth, that he didn't see him grow through the tender years of his infancy.

Rhaegar needed a father, and it was Cregan who raised him.

"Does he even know who I am? Who his father is?"

The guilty look on your face betrays you, and you know immediately that you've hurt his feelings. It may be selfish of you, but he needs to understand.

"You were supposed to be dead. There's still a lot he doesn't know." 

He doesn't say anything. You don't have the courage to meet his hard, stern gaze, you don't have the courage to see the disappointment and pain on his face, because if you do, your heart will tighten and you will fall apart.

"He's still so young. Give him time." You add, your fingers tracing small circles on the back of his hand, in an attempt to soothe him. 

You know how much Aemond wanted a son, and you know it's cruel to take that from him.  You know he would have made a good father. You can picture him with Rhaegar on his knee, reading him stories, telling him about the adventures of Vhagar and Visenya, and you love the image that forms in your mind.

You told Rhaegar about Aemond, though he was still too young to understand. You told him that his father had once owned the greatest dragon in the world, that his father was a fearless man for it was true, and you saw his big eyes light up. 

Aemond pulls you closer to him. "I want to be there for him, you know."  Unlike Viserys, but he doesn't have to say it, you understand what he means in the undertone he leaves at the end of his sentence.  He has always suffered from his father's indifference.

You cuddle up to him and he runs his fingers through your long curls. For a moment, you imagine that everything is fine and you search for his touch. He plants a kiss on the top of your head.

"I've missed you," he admits, the words landing on the tips of his lips in the silence of the bedroom, but you're already dozing off.

You know that tomorrow will be made up of choices and decisions. 

But for now, you fall asleep in the embrace of his very real arms, for once, enjoying the illusion of the life you both could have had.

[ebaylee422]

I Want Your Video

Steve x Fem!Reader

Author’s Note: Steve won the poll, when I first started really reading fanfiction on tumblr early 2020-2021 there was a fic with mutual masturbation with BestFriend!Steve Harrington and this plays into the very heavy. I’ve been wanting to fuck you forever part for inspo. Also just love Djo’s music so a lot of my WIPs have titles of his music. Requests are open if you want more sexy Steve, thank you for reading!

Summary: Family Video just became a little less family friendly with the new addition of the 18 and older erotic video room. You are more curious than your co-workers about what a dirty movie includes, the sexual tension between you and dreamboat Steve Harrington does nothing for your pent up frustrations. 

Characters: Steve Harrington, Robin Buckley, Family Video Worker!Reader, Dustin, Lucas, Mike, Max, El and Will love to pester Steve at his jobs, and gross mentions of Keith. 

Warning/Tags: SMUT (Minors DNI), Steve has a huge cock, dry humping, marking, fingering (f receiving), blow job, overstim, small nubbins of insecurities with reader and Steve, Steve and reader share playful banter, a ruined Armchair, dirty talk, pet names, riding (save a horse ride Steve Harrington), we all love boobies, creampie, cum play?  As always lmk if I forgot anything!

Word Count: 6.2k

"Well I knew they called it Family Video for a reason, I just never thought they'd take it so literally." You said as the three of you looked to the closed door with the new 18 plus warning sign, taking away your break room.

"Please stop mentioning it.” Robin pinches at the bridge of her nose

"What? At least people don't like, deal porn or try to find it at a public library." Steve adds setting the return tapes on the counter.

"Why would someone go to the library for PORN?" Robin boasts turning to her best friend,

"I don't know Buckley, people are stupid when horny." Steve admonishes

“Does that mean your always horny?” You tease, Steve opens his mouth to retaliated but Robin stops him. 

"No, now we just have Keith, who was already always in the back room. Potentially watching adult films on the clock and putting them back." Robin shakes in disgust.

"Like a trial run, he’ll be able to give great recommendations." You add nose scrunched with laughter bubbling in your chest.

"Ew gross." Robin said nauseated 

"Look he's creepy, but Keith is not that brave. Any one of us could walk back there." Steve says pointing to the ever closed office and backroom where Keith either naps or throws together a schedule. 

"Maybe he wants to be caught?" you nod, taking new tapes to stock in the romance section.

“Maybe he wants you to catch him?” Steve wiggles his eyebrows following you,

"Maybe you want me to smack you in the face-" You turn to find him closer than you anticipated only a few inches separating your body from his. 

"What? Don't be a prude now, you're the one who made the conversation interesting." Steve cut you off, chest puffed in challenge. His woodsy, ash, and vanilla smell intoxicating you as the spearmint on his breath floated you back to reality.

"That's because I'm interesting." You dare with a raised eyebrow, as his eyes flicker to your cherry lips.

"God please stop flirting in front of me or I'll get a cavity." Robin whines behind the counter. 

"We're not flirting-" You scold, "Okay-" Steve holds his hands up in defense at the same time. You huff and continue down the aisle to stock, red in the face with embarrassment. 

Towards the end of your shift the school rush dying down, you sit on the counter with Robin inventorying returns in the computer. Steve is holding the door open for a blonde girl popping her bubble gum with glossed lips. Giggling as Steve makes a fool of himself her chest rising with the laughter, over a Star Wars joke she didn’t understand. Explaining how she had been looking for the film in Alderaan places, and how he was always happy to help a pretty girl like her. 

You understood the joke, just because he didn’t know what Ewoks were didn’t mean he never paid attention when you talked about your favorite sci-fi series. 

“Stupid.” You mumbled under your breathe, rewinding tapes.

“Huh?” Robin asked, her doe eyes floating along the computers interface confused her mouth hung open. 

"Robs, have you ever watched an adult film?" You asked, aggravated and pent up.

"Yeah but there's not a lot in my area of attraction so I just stick to the magazines." Robin motioned toward herself, still clueless to your annoyance.

"Uh-huh, well I want to watch one." Finally being decisive on the embarrassing topic,

"Are we seriously still talking about this?" Steve chips in

"Did you seriously just strike out? You talked with her for like 30 seconds." You said infuriated, turning around to see him leaning over the counter with his stupid fluffy hair and tight polo. Sans a phone number written on his arms or a torn piece of notebook paper.

"Just remember Y/N that's all a man can give sometimes, porn isn't realistic." Robin added knocking her head into your leg in frustrated groan.

“How would you know that?” Steve scrutinized his best friend,

“Is it true?!” Robins eyes were blown wide in astonishment, they immediately started arguing with you the only barrier between them.

"Okay, I'm just gonna go back there and pick one." You slide from the counter, move Robin out of your way, they paused mid-argument to poke at you.

"Go for it, have fun." Robin called

"But not too much!" Steve yelped when she pinched him,

Opening the cliché room, of neon lights with each film had it’s own space on the shelves you began to read some of the titles. Private Teacher, Taboo, I Like to be Watched, Educating Nina, Talk Dirty to Me 1 and 2, 8 to 4, there's honestly too many. So let's just say that the first one, Private Teacher, sounds like it has some plot. You slip it into your vest, walking out of the room to find Steve surrounded by his children.

“Please Steve what’s back there?”

“We just want to take a quick peak!”

“For the millionth time, no. You’re barely 13!”

“We’re actually 14 and or older Steve.” Max says deadpan standing arms crossed next to a girl you think was named Jane or El you weren’t 100% sure. 

“Yeah kids leave the guy alone just because he would sneak you into the movie's at Scoops does not mean you get free rain of the porno’s.”

“Porno’s?!” Dustin yells as the rest of the kids shush him, looking around the other Family Video patrons.

“Yeah that’s enough Steve’s posse, your scaring away paying customers.” You shush them out the door, 

"Come on, I bet you have some criticism about at least one of these dirty movies." Robin asks Steve who is using every fiber in his being not to embarrass himself in front of you.

"Actually, I haven't watched any of them yet," Steve says while he re-faces the horror films the kids probably messed with earlier.

“Bullshit-” You butt in, Steve turns to defend himself but is saved by Robin’s blabbermouth. 

"I do but mostly for the... well you know, porno's aren't progressive in my territory yet." Robin held up the one, where the woman's boobs were almost completely out of her bra and there was a string of spit from her mouth to them.

"Well we could change this week's movie night at my place? This one seemed well loved. 3 rents already, and it’s only been a few weeks." I grabbed 'Private Teacher' walking over to Steve, the man had the woman bent over the desk, one of his hands pulling her hair so show her face for the camera. Her school girl costume left a tasteful amount of skin on show just for the cover. The tagline read ‘Sometimes A Little Private Instruction Is All You Need To Make The Grade’

He only glanced at the cover, "Yeah I'm good, I get my fill with my right hand and watching sappy some romance movies over and over again."

"Ewwww," Robin drones behind the counter. You laugh at his in response holding onto your sides while walking back over to her.

"Obviously, not in that order!" He follows, you pull out some rental money setting on the counter as Robin rang it up.

"Oh come on now, Stevie don't be the prude of the group. Robin will be there too and I know you don't have anything better to do. Since you're always at my house anyway." He scoffs hiding the tape under his elbow when another customer walks in.

"Yeah to get away from my asshole Dad, not to watch porn with you." 

"I think he would enjoy the fact you're actually finding a hobby," Robin says, putting the tape into a plastic bag, brushing some hair out of Steve's face. He sticks out his tongue mocking her. 

"Yes Robin, you're a truly hilarious comedian of the century. What do I have to do for you both to drop this? Especially as my best friend and basically my boss." You giggle at the obvious answer.

"Just come by tonight, Steve. I don’t wanna watch this alone. And like always bring your tissues for the movie," Robin almost falls over laughing, when you lean over the counter pressing a kiss to his heated cheek before waving goodbye. You spend the rest of your night picking up the apartment, filling the fridge with your friends favorite snacks, and vacuuming. You thought about lighting a candle, debating if that was too romantic to watch a Porno with your co-workers. Lighting it against those thoughts because it made the place smell nice. A knock at the door took you away from the sink of dishes from your breakfast.

“Come in! It’s open guys!” You yell turning off the faucet,

“What if I was a serial killer, Y/N? You’d let me wander about your living room?” Steve brushed his front past you setting a six-pack in the fridge.

“The only serial thing you are Steve is a serial pain in my butt.” You stick you tongue out, head lurching towards the direction of the living room only to find it empty.

“Ha-ha, ha.” Steve mocked, taking off his grey jacket to lay it across the counter before nose diving into the fridge again.

"How was your day? Where’s Buckley?" You pondered wiping your wet hands, the moving his jacket to a chair at the small four person dining table.

“Hanging out with a girl. And other than this chick at work begging me to watch porn with her, it was actually really busy." He threw a grape at where you were at the table, tossing a handful into his mouth with a crunch.

"I totally forgot about it until I was grabbing my wallet at the store, I was kinda embarrassed when I rediscovered it. The lady probably thought I was high as a kite!"

"Because you are," he drooled a little bit, speaking with a full mouth, raiding the fridge full of groceries.

"There's nothing wrong with blowing off some steam with a bit of erotica. Everyone does it," you turned tossing the soiled grape back at him, joining him in the kitchen again.

"Yeah that's gross, it's unspoken. Even creepy old men who can't get it up do it." He swallowed his mouth full then making an obscene gesture with his hand.

"Ew, gross Steve.” You say hands held up in disgust,

"See-"

"Well I'm not a creepy old man," You argued, taking the tape out of your bag. "Besides, it can't be that good or bad. Almost like a true neutral, just people going at it like animals." Walking into the living room, you closed the blinds and navy curtains before setting the tape into the already plugged in VCR.

"Okay hang on a minute, there's way better ways at blowing off steam." Steve interrupts, the fridge slams as his steps grow louder.

"Name a few for me, Lover Boy." You scoffed still bent at the waist, setting everything up at the entertainment center. Round shape of your ass in those acid wash jeans begging to be released. The sight made Steve’s own tighter around his crotch.

"I don't think you want to know mine," he says breathlessly, voice a bit deeper. You stood up and turned to where he stood, his back up against the archway that separated the two rooms. The tape started playing in the middle of the stars going at each other, extremely loud feminine moans rang from the Television. It broke you from the stare down, rushing to turn it down. He came up behind you on the rug, turning everything off altogether. After a pause of shock, you rolled over laughing against the entertainment center, covering your red face with your hands. Steve huffed sitting back on his calves, laughing at it as well. Eyes drifting to the swell of your chest as the laughing made it rise a fall. Dragging the hands down your face, leaning against the shelves. You clocked his stare immediately, his pupils are blown wide, lips slick as if he just wet them. Polo tight across his shoulders but untucked showing off a flash of his soft tummy. You swallowed hard catching your breath.

“Steve?” You reach out to him, his arms grip back at your elbows pulling you up on your knees towards his knees. “I wanna know, I want to know.” His nose pressed to your cheek, lip grazing over yours as he spoke. 

“I can show you.” His voice broke, husky and deep exhale along your skin. Your resolve faltered lips fitting like a puzzle against his. You pulled far enough away to split for air, only Steve followed pressing you closer together. Hand resting along your neck, holding you to him. 

"What's wrong?" You looked at him worried a line creasing your forehead he reached out to soothe.

"Nothing, you're just so...beautiful." He let his eyes wander, admiring that you’d even gave him the time of day.

“I want you. I want you to show me.”

“Okay.” Connecting again fireworks exploded behind your eyes. He pulled your top lip between his, you returned by licking the slope of his bottom lip from an open mouth kiss. Steve groaned, allowing you in. He tasted of the grapes from moments ago and spearmint of the gum he chewed to stop smoking, it was sickly sweet. My hand from his thigh came up to brush away the free fallen hair from getting in our way, the strands of hair were so soft, surprising, no matter how many times you’d wished to touch them. Pushing your chest against his, raising up on your knees deepening the kiss. He sunk down to a seated position, crossing his legs and leaning his head back to a lower level. It gave more access, he kept his hands in nice places like; nape of your neck, tangled hair, cheeks, small of the back and waist. You nipped his bottom lip, pulling gently then watched it fall back in place. He gripped one of your thighs, sending shocks of anticipation up your core. He kneaded, silently wanting for sometime. Everything was too good to break away and use words. You just obediently moved one leg at a time to sit on his lap. Using his shoulders to steady, lowering onto his lap. He whimpered in anticipation in you mouth, your heat grazed the zipper of his jeans. At the friction you gasped, lips swollen and lungs out of air, as you pressed foreheads together. Eyes opening to see him staring with hopefulness, eyes wide open. You teased lightly trailing lips over his. Waiting for a reaction, but he stayed firm. Hands on the ground by his sides holding you upright. Breathing as one for a moment before he spoke,

"I've thought about this moment for a very long time," He said only for the two of you, your fingers rubbed the five o’clock shadow of his jaw in your waiting hands "I want to, so terribly. I don't know where to go from here..." 

He smiled a dorky smile into your skin, keening at the contact of you against him.

"Then stop talking and kiss me again." He obeyed, trailing his lips down to your jaw, throat and to your collar, moving the fabric slightly he started softly sucking and rolling his tongue over the area. Your hands desperately clung to the back of his head, he moved closer to the pot of your collarbones and throat leaving wet kisses. He stopped his mouth looking up, with those caramel eyes so full of devotion. Mind going fuzzy, seeing the way he not only looked but saw into you. The way he always has. "Don’t stare at me like that,"

"Like what?" He let the collar of the shirt scrunch back in place the movement made you squeeze your thighs around his middle, eyes rolling back in his skull.

"Like you want to kiss me or something." His hands both came up to brush his thumbs along your ribs, fronts pressed against each other.

"I will never stop looking at you like that, no matter what happens.” He smiled, “I gave you my heart long ago." You kissed him more primal this time, needing to taste him and etch the feeling of him into your mind. He was moaning into the embrace, he still barely touched as you tugged at his shirt below, when he broke contact to pull it over his head you stopped the kiss to admire his chest.

"Steve..." You wheezed through bloated lips. "Touch me, it's okay. You can't hurt me" He kissed back hard, slipping his hands underneath your tight work shirt, his hands cold against the hot skin covering your spine. Breaking free from his lips pressing kisses on his face, down his throat cooing into him when he unclasped your bra with one hand in a single fluid motion. Running his hands over your bare back, unknowingly while you rotated your hips in small circles against his wanting more. Craving the contact and friction of him against you. He daintily ran his hands down your body hesitantly gripping the plush of your ass adding more pressure to the growing friction. His zipper felt so good against your own, letting go of your lips on his neck throwing your head back. As the feeling of his hard-on pressed up against your clit. Putting both hands on the floor behind you while he moved your hips against each other in sync, panting and grinding seeking release. Steve's abdomen flexed as he twitched under you, he was cumming loudly moaning your name from his pink lips. It sounded like a song when he said it, his release came fast, his chest heaving heavily as he pulled your body back against him. Hugging each other till lips grazed, as he came down from his high. You tried to suppress the giggle as his hands traced shapes along the small of your back.

"What are you so giddy about? You just made me cream my pants like a middle schooler." You shook your head tracing at the mark I left on his shoulder,

"Well since we're already past the point of no return. I didn't think you would be so loud." you pulled back lip bitten between teeth,

"Maybe if you weren't mauling me like a hungry lion, I could've stayed quiet." He tucks his head under your chin,

"I told you, I’m a lion girl not a ninja.” He laughed across your throat warming you as he kissed the flesh again. “Maybe I should pounce effectively, so I can really hear you scream my name." Steve stopped abruptly to meet your eyes, pupils blown wide, you felt immediately self-conscious blabbering out an apology before he could turn you down. "I’m so sorry, was that too much?"

"No...” He purred, this close you could tell the scent of him was distinctly cedar.  “I've actually never been more turned on." He pushed his lips to mine, rolling our tongues against each other, knowing exactly what you liked. He tightened his grip on on the fat of your hips and making you moan into him, pulling away his lips, forehead glistening, his eyes full of lust. He trailed his fingers up to help the offensive fabric of your shirt off, the bra slowly falling the rest of the way off your shoulders. His length twitched against the inside of your thigh again, he was entranced by the image. Still as a statue until guiding his lips down to the spot on you chest that made the world melt. He kissed everywhere, you kept each hand in his hair scratching at his scalp pleasantly. Leaning forward he placed your back against the carpet, hovering on top of but keeping himself slotted between your legs. Involuntarily moaning when he licked at erect nipple, he mirrored the same to the other one. His dick throbbed against the stain of cum, straining against the fabric. Kissing each while he unzipped the high waist of your jeans. You bucked your hips and helped him pull them down, he took them off your trapped ankles, restarting his descent to kiss down the length of your body again. Wet open mouth kisses making shooting sparks through your body at the intimate contact, grabbing his hand on the ground. 

“You are even more beautiful than my dreams ever allowed. Everything, you are everything.” His eyes silently asking for permission. As he slid a hand under the fabric of the green panties. You gasped loudly at the unbridled new contact of his palm, lowering to gather the dampness, trailing it up to your clit. He circled twice as his other fingers began to slowly plunge inside. You keened, calves dug into the bare flesh around his waist, “You're so wet for me,” sighing, hands finding purchase on his biceps, he hissed as his face fell into your neck.

“Uhh… Harder.” You held his arms with such intensity, leaving crescent marks into the skin digging hard into his muscle. Turning you chin down to find his lips to kiss, and silencing moans together his thumb began to swirl faster, his middle and ring finger able to go a little deeper with the changing hand position. Not being able to control the heat coursing through, you squeezed his hips harder. He whimpered, pressing himself up against your thigh rutting the fabric against himself for some contact. “Your fingers feel so good…” Moving lower, spreading wider to move your hips against his fingers, they worked expertly to consume all your senses. He pushed in a little further and harder, forcing you to look at what he was doing so wonderfully between your legs. Moaning obscene words, as your back arched further his fingers scissoring to stretch your walls. Clenching around his fingers that disappeared inside. “Holy shit- don’t stop.” Your hands fell to the floor grabbing the shag of the rug underneath, as muscles tensed unlike anything you’ve felt before. You came hard without warning, the orgasm spread through you, completely overwhelming, your legs shook out your high as he kept going, pressure building through your bladder before you felt a light gush.

"Fuck" He whispered in you ear, you could feel the shit eating grin off of his body language. 

"I haven’t done that before," you tell him.

"Yeah me either, ya know to a girl… I do that every time," he said into your neck, your cheeks instantly flushed. Laughing at his dorkiness, he moved your panties back in place. His fingers parted his lips, licking them clean of your arousal. You felt him throbbing against your thigh as you lightly pushed off the ground. Taking Steve's hand, you pushing him back to climb on the Lazy Boy you'd recently bought.

“What are you thinking, Sweets?” his voice was dark, he moved up the chair and sat. Spreading his legs for you, like the good boy he’d been.

“I just want to clean up my seat, Lover Boy.” You knelt down unbuckling his jeans, pulling them down and his ruined underwear. Letting him finally be free from the confines of the fabric, his cock flung back up pre leaving a pearlescent trail on the course hair of his happy trail. Steve was massive, how he’d fit into those jeans daily made your head spin. You would make him fit, even if his cock impaled your insides. 

“You don’t have to, no one’s been able to take all of me before.” He took your wanderlust as fear, and shit now you had to prove him wrong too. Your nails ran up his thighs as you collected some spit in the front of your mouth. Letting it drip onto the head, nails gripping his thigh to hold him in place you took the other hand and ran it across his length. Hitting the large vein along his shaft with your thumb, he pushed his head back against the plush chair. Fighting to buck up into you with everything in his body and mind not to blow his load again or buck up into you. He was breathing extremely heavily now, you gently kissed his red tip and watched as his fingers dug into the armrests. He held his breath a bit before you squeezed his thigh, then he exhaled. You then licked a long stripe down his shaft, you came back up to the tip flicking it with your tongue.

“Jesus, stop with the teasing Sweets,” You smiled like a siren, before holding him with a hand stroking up and down with your lips wrapped around the tip. He accidently to bucked his hips, you pressed his pelvis down taking in his full length.

“Holy shit!” Steve gasped. Hollowing your cheeks, you worked him to a pulp as your jaw went slack. His hands reached out to grab the hair that fell covering how you looked sucking him. Pulling it all to one hand, he didn’t need to guide your head, you were able to bob your head down him with a fair amount of ease with how wet you’d gotten his shaft. Tearing up and gaging if you went too slow, but it was well worth the noises coming from his beautiful lips. He watched in awe as you swallowed around him, eyes watery and spit slick chin, moving your second hand under his heavy sack you massaged them with each upstroke. HIs eye closed tightly as he twitched inside your mouth throwing his head back warning you. You took it all with a delightful swallow, helping him ride out the rest of his high with a hand. The only time he pulled his makeshift ponytail was when he could’ve cried from the stimulation. You relented with a pornographic pop, wiping your chin with the back of your hand and slowly stood going to straddle him, he playfully grabbed your body and pulled you to him on the lounge chair.

“That was way better than any other girl or me just watching porn.” you looked at him mouth agape, he was eye level with your bare chest.

“See, I knew you watched porn. A shit ton of it.” you slapped his chest.

“Yeah, but nothing compares to the real thing,” he began to kiss the marks he already started on your chest, in places only he’d only been allowed too. Your hands cupped his face for him to look at you. He smiled his beautiful heartfelt smile,

“Why didn’t we do this sooner?”

“I don’t know but Robin is the best wing women ever. She told me if I didn’t kiss you tonight I shouldn’t even bother showing my face at work tomorrow.”

“Wait, what is Robin doing?”

“She cancelled so we could in her words ‘either fuck away the tension out or kill each other’ .”

“Well she is definitely my favorite lesbian. That multi-lingual B is a genius. I would’ve let you do this even if you’d just. I don’t know asked me on a date.”

“Bullshit-, really?”

“Are you kidding?! You are so out of my league Steve, I’ve never been in your ballpark ever in my life.” He grimaces, thumb tracing idling along your hip bone.

“I’ve always thought you were the most beautiful, smart and caring girl. I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing, and I selfishly want you all to myself.” he whispers with affection you’d never heard from him before. Adam’s apple bobbing with his thick swallow of emotion.

“Then you have me.” he bit back a smile as his lip clashed with yours passionately kissing you, he faintly pulled your hair. You moaned at the action, spine tingling as you roamed your hands around his frame. Mapping out ever mole and divot along his heated skin. Trailing them back and forth on his chest like a sensual massage. He moved his hands to get a better angle on your hips, and began rowing them against himself. You both groaned at the friction, “Look who’s the tease now,” you pouted at him as a finger inched it way  to your clit tracing tight consistent circles. Your nails tear at his shoulders with pleasure, making him shudder under you. ‘God how many rounds could you go with him’ “Please… uh. Tell me you're ready.” you push your head into his neck, his fingers had already fine-tuned your pleasure. He stopped, fingers yanking your scalp to crash your lips to his. He still rowing you against his length, until his lungs screamed for air.

“I’m always ready, how do you feel about this?” he stops his motions, you felt unfulfilled when the movement ceased. You brain finally grasping some clarity, Steve would stop everything here if you wanted him too. Helping you re-dress and seeing himself out. Never telling a soul if you’d asked, he’d be celibate if you’d ask. Buying you the finest ring until your wedding night then ravishing you in your honeymoon bed. 

“This doesn’t change the way I feel about you. You’re perfect to me Steve.” he gave you a sinful smile, reaching his hand under your adjoined hips pushing you up onto your knees. While he finished working himself up, you waited as patiently as you could by marking his neck.

“God you're so wet for me, these panties are drenched after sucking me. We should’ve gotten rid of them, already.” His eyes were playful, and needy for more and all of you. He helped you stand, putting your hands on his shoulder to balance you as you took them off. Just the sight of you fully naked made his heart ache, he kissed your arm lips too far for his liking. Wanting even more contact, he grabbed your waist again leaning back into the chair. You kissed him lazy, you both were fucked out of your minds already. Now it was just comforting, you had all the time in the world. It was slow, sweet, his lips were so soft you still felt them all over your body. His hands roamed but craved to rest on your chest above your heart. You pressed your forehead against his, catching your breath. His hands on your hips, guided you gently down as you felt him at your entrance.

“Take your time, Sweets. I want us to enjoy this,” nipping at your forearm while sitting himself farther up the chair, feet still planted on the ground.

“You want me to top, you?”

“Is that a problem?”

“I haven’t done that… Before.” You told him shyly, 

“Well, well. Looks like we're about to enter a new realm of pleasure for you…” Licking his lips, “just take me in your hand and guide yourself down at your own speed, Sweetheart.” His comforting words sent a tingle down your spine, you put your hands on the soft skin where his pelvis lies. He just observes your movements gripping your hips like a steering wheel, mouth awestruck as you lower yourself down onto him. His hands dig into you, as you let him fill your insides. Immediately he’s touching things you’ve never felt, it’s painful in the most remarkable way.

“Shit, babe. Oh my god. Didn’t-Didn’t think you’d take all of me on the first go.” he shifts pulling your chest so he can latch on to his dark purple mark there. It causes a rush inside you even just the slight motion making you want to explode.

“Feels so full, god your fucking humongous Steve.” You whined, high pitched and needy. The ach of his cock started to morph from a burn to a stretch faster than you thought as your arousal dripped down your thighs. In brief circles you moved your hips against him, keeping him completely sheathed inside. Your eyes roll to the back of your head, he moves his hands to your thighs squeezing hard making you grind faster. He comes up for air from you chest and lets out a gracious moan,

“Stevie, pull the handle.” you whimper at him,

“What?” he mutters breathlessly.

“Holy shit, just…” you're on the brink of another powerful orgasm, pussy gripping him like a vice ”pull the handle back, trust me.” he lets go of one of your thighs frantically looking for the handle on the side of the recliner. He finally finds it and pulls hard, sending his lower body up into yours and your upper body over his. You both moan in ecstasy, his hand going back to your thigh. Sitting back up, you place one hand on his lower abdomen and the other on his hairy thigh behind you. He continues to groan affirmations and your name at the changed position, sending you over a small cliff. Only adding to the larger knot in your stomach, running up your body.  

“Keep going I want you to cum, cum around my fat cock.”

“Don’t stop, stay right there. I want it all.” You pant feeling him twitch inside you, moving your hips with his.

“God you're so wet, and you ride me so good Sweetheart.” he playfully smacks your ass, you change your position again to bring your lips to his. He moves your body up and down while kissing you, letting you dominate his mouth while he starts to push harder into you. Propelling himself up, while his hands push you down into him in an erratic give and take. This is what you’ve needed, this was perfect but not even the start for both of you. He continues to praise you through breaths of pleasure “I got you” , “I can make you feel so good, Sweetheart.”, he gets filthier and louder and you keep moving, riding each other to passionate oblivion. Your mind ventures to his lips all over you, yours on him, the coil in between you wraps him tightly inside you. Your body starts to shake from the high, you press your upper body against his chest the hair rubbing against your hardened nipples.

"Good girl, milk my cock. Feels so good, gunna cum. You gotta move Sweets."

“Want to feel you, feel you dripping out of me Steve.” He mewls, clinging to you.

“Shit. Beg me for it, tell me how bad you want me to cum inside you.”

“Oh Steve,” you open your eyes, pressing your forehead down to meet him, his open too. You clutch your walls around him harder as he tries to finish riding your orgasm, “Please.” You whimper. That’s all it takes he gasps and finally bursts in you. Lips soothing against yours for that other contact. You feel the hot liquid inside you, wringing him dry of everything that he could possibly have left.

Separating for air out of the kiss, feeling his hot breaths against your cheeks, he groans, swallowing hard at the sensitivity. You brush your hair off of your sweaty face, holding onto the back of his neck to see him better. His eyes gleamed with passion, you smiled back.

“My legs are jelly,” you laugh in his face,

“I’ll take that as an answer to my question then,” he smiles, lifting your hips up. He easily slips out of you, you groan in frustration at the emptiness between your legs. Hissing at the loss as well, his abs quiver against the softness of your soft tummy. He pushes the foot rest back, so he can sit upright in the chair. Capturing his lips in yours, leaning you back as he holds you manhandling your hips, rotating you forward to help you stand.

“I could kiss you forever.” He admits kissing your shoulders as you put your feet on the cold floor, pushing off of his knees. You wobble slightly, 

“See,” you turned to face him again, pulling him up to stand together face to face. He stumbled a bit too, “completely fucked out of my mind.” He wraps his arms around your waist swaying you slightly in an embrace.

“You did so good, Sweetheart. We should get cleaned up.”

“I did good, how did you not run out of cum? Three rounds your insatiable.”

"Told you, I don't joke about my porn." He winks, kissing the corner of your mouth as he picks up your discarded clothes on the floor of the living room. 

"No wonder you're idolized by 14 year old boys." You roll your eyes, picking up your panties. This time when you bend own he can see his spend dripping down your slit. He chuckles from behind you a free hand, coasting down your stomach to your heat. You gasp as his fingers collect his cum from your thighs, you spin in his hold to meet his eyes.

"Open." Steve commands, eyes clouding with lust as he watches you stick your tongue out for him. His fingers slide along your tongue covered in each other's spend. It's comforting, salty, and heady against your tongue. You moan around him, sucking the taste clean from his fingers. He fingers slip out tongue replacing them, as he tips your chin up to meet his lips deeper, tongue kneading yours as he memorizes you. Inside and out.

“You know,” You murmur into his mouth as his mouth strays from yours coasting to mouth down your jaw. “I have a camcorder somewhere in my closet.” He freezes lips parted and eyes wide.

“Yeah? You don’t want to finish the movie? I was just starting to enjoy it.” You pout your lips, while he picks up all of the clothes from various places you threw them.

“Yeah... We could or..?”

“Or?”

“If you wanted we could make are own video?” Steve doesn’t even dictate your question with a response only hoisting you over his shoulder and burying you in the mattress for the rest of the night. 

Masterlist

[drvscarlett]

Sweet Nothings (3)

Carlos Sainz x Pageant Queen!Reader

Summary: All that they ever wanted was sweet nothings but everything changed like midnight rain.

Sweet Nothings 1 2 3 4

A/N: this the second to the last chapter. The last chapter would be in story format and a lil bit of smau. Let me know what you folks think about this one.

ChiliUpdates just posted a photo

ChiliUpdates Media day duties for Carlos in Vegas today!

User5 Goodluck on Vegas,get that WDC carlos

User6 VAMOS CARLOSSSSS

User7 look at him being so smiley

User16 im so happy to see Carlos smiling so much, he deserves happiness.

ChiliUpdates posted a reel

//We are ready to extend our lead for the championship. I have a very good feeling that with my skills, car, and some luck then we might be able to surpass Max before we race in Abu Dhabi. I'm really excited to drive this weekend.//

liked by YNjpeg and 600,552 others

User6 Never imagined we will be fighting for the WDC this year

User7 Im gonna go and pray for a Ferrari 1-2

User8 Carlos is really a driven man, respect!

User10 Carlos are you getting excited to drive this weekend because someone is also here in vegas 👀

QueenYNUpdates just posted a photo.

liked by CarlosSainz55 and 2,982 others.

QueenYNUpdates Her gown for the prelims and the swimsuit competition

User7 DUDE THE GOWN!!!

User8 THE SLO MO TURN, MISS MAAM???

User65 ate and left no crumbs, all the other contestants can go home

YNjpeg posted a photo.

Liked by CarlosSainz55, McLaren, and 987,562 others

YNjpeg this is what we called the Ibong Adarna dress. It is inspired by a Filipino mythological bird that has the ability to enchant anyone who hears it sing. Furthermore, the Ibong Adarna is also a phoenix that regenerates and rises from the ashes. The dress is a symbol of resilience, rising and rebirth 🧡

Thank you for the team for making this amazing craftmanship.

User8 The lore behind her dress??? NO ONE CAN TOP HER ATTENTION TO DETAILS

User9 everyone should do it like her

User10 she is SERVINGGG,MY MISS UNIVERSE 2024

McLaren our 🧡👑

User5 admin so real for this one User6 anyone wanna bet with me that this is Lando's doing? User20 the fact that she is still the papaya queen for mclaren is like how carlos is still an unofficial family of mclaren

CarlosY/NUpdates posted a photo.

CarlosY/NUpdates Carlos Sainz' face when someone showed him a photo of Y/N in her prelim gown.

User5 wtf,why did they have to show him that???

User1 right??? stop bringing her up. User3 Hi im the one that showed him that. I was watching miss universe while waiting for carlos to sign a cap. Carlos saw my screen and asked me if I could show him when Y/N is on the screen. He was in the middle of the interview when Y/N came up so I kind of screamed to show him. Im sorry if I made any trouble. User9 me reading this made me cry

User6 look at the man and tell me that he is not in love with her

User7 he never stopped loving her, thats my theory.

User8 Im gonna play Gracie Abrams all over again

User10 Carlos you might trick everyone but those eyes dont lie.

ChiliUpdates just posted a photo.

liked by YNjpeg and 3,234 others

ChiliUpdates Carlos Sainz wins the Las Vegas Grand Prix. He is now 4 points ahead of Max Verstappen and is currently P1 in the WDC.

User1 WOW CARLOS!! WE USED TO PRAY FOR TIMES LIKE THIS

User2 THE NEXT FERRARI CHAMPION IS CARLOS. IM CALLING IT.

User3 Look at the pure glee on his face when he won. He deserves this so much

User4 Thats our smooothhh operatorrrrrr

User10 MISS MAAM YNjpeg what are you doing lurking here???

User11 isnt the miss universe starting in a few minutes??? User17 Y/N never beating the they are not yet over each other allegations

CarlosY/NUpdates just posted a photo.

CarlosY/NUpdates someone just saw Carlos outside the place for the Miss Universe!!!! They also reported Lando, Lewis, and Charles at the venue as well

User1 he is going to see Y/N! ITS HAPPENING!!!

User2 I love a supportive ex

User3 Y/N bringing out the whole grid to support her, its just so wholesome to think about

User7 They really went from racing suits to formal wear in an hour, Y/N's power over the grid User8 they really love her User9 especially Carlos. The man didn't celebrate and went to her right away User10 why did they ever break up?? they are so good with each other

User11 ugly crying

User12 I want a supportive ex boyfriend and a supportive friend group.

QueenY/NUpdates

liked by CarlosSainz55, LandoNorris, and 872,983 others

QueenY/NUpdates Take a look at the girl on fire! This is Y/N's evening gown, she is simply gorgeous in red!

User7 ugly crying, she is so beautiful

User55 WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT THE DRESS BEING IN RED???

User9 its literally screaming carlos sainz User10 Y/N and Carlos's color is definitely red

User8 SHE DESERVES THE CROWN, GIVE IT TO HER ALREADY!!

User12 and the explanation how she paid homage to her mother's hometown??? SHE IS OUR QUEEN

User13 i love how her dresses has a certain piece of history

User14 i dont usually watch pageants and I got curious because an ex wag is here but MYGOD SHE IS STUNNING!!

User22 send everyone home, Y/N is taking the crown

LandoNorris posted a story

YNjpeg replied: im so so grateful for your love and support LandoNorris replied: so proud of you!!! You deserve the best YNjpeg replied: stop making me cry LandoNorris replied: Carlos cried a lot when they started crowning you. LandoNorris replied: he has to share his universe to the universe lol

CarlosSainz55 just posted a photo.

CarlosSainz55 When I tell you that you are beautiful, I am not simply talking about your looks. I talk about your eyes that shows compassion, your heart that is so generous, and your voice that speaks for those who cannot speak for themselves.

I am extremely proud of you YNjpeg. Everything was worth it.

YNjpeg I'm always grateful for your support.

CarlosSainz55 always here for you.

CarlosSainz55 limited comments to this post.

[impromptu-sketches]

𝔹𝕃 𝟚𝟘𝟚𝟛 ✦ 𝕎ℝ𝔸ℙ-𝕌ℙ

Happy New Year! ☕️⋅˚₊‧🌸•₊✧📖｡⋆

For all of the BL stories I've read this past year, I have a winner in 13 categories and 5 overall 2023 winners!!

This was an amazing year for BL and incredibly hard just to narrow these down to only five per category. Thank you to all of the authors, writers, and creators out there! We appreciate your hard work ♡

Enjoy!

.

.

✰ FUNNIEST

And the nominees are...

Killer Crush (2022 winner)

Punch Drunk Love

Sekai-ichi Hatsukoi / The World's Greatest First Love: The Case of Ritsu Onodera

Lucky Paradise

Sasaki and Miyano

And the winner is...

PUNCH DRUNK LOVE

Moscareto, you've done it again. I'm literally laughing every chapter. The characters, the art, the whole story is amazing. Can't wait to continue reading it this year and will definitely be a re-read for me down the line. Love those AU chapters too!!

.

✰ MOST INTRIGUING

And the nominees are...

Mad Place (2021 winner)

Lost in the Cloud

Shutline

Liveta

I Became the Lousy Side Top

And the winner is...

I BECAME THE LOUSY SIDE TOP

Yay!! I was so surprised by this manhwa. I started to re-read it and suddenly it was taking over my thoughts - the transportation mystery and the shifting love triangle has me hooked!! I'm so excited to see where it goes from here ❀

.

✰ BEST S3X SCENES

And the nominees are...

Pearl Boy

Love in Orbit

Coyote

Taming the Tiger

The Ghost's Nocturne

And the winner is...

COYOTE

I mean... everything this author does is beautiful and sexy af. Their very first sex scene was... very good. The difference in species, the secrets, the newness, the amazing art style (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ Easily some of the hottest scenes I've read.

.

✰ FAVORITE FLUFF

And the nominees are...

Our Dining Table

The Third Ending

Sasaki and Miyano

Hirano and Kagiura

Our Sunny Days

And the winner is...

OUR DINING TABLE

Awwwwww this one was so cute!! I read and also watched the live action which was great ♡ I usually don't get attached to shorter mangas because you don't spend as much time with the story and characters, but because I watched the live action with this one it's stuck in my heart. Super soft romance ♡

.

✰ FAVORITE BOTTOM

And the nominees are...

Seo-an | The Pizza Delivery Man and the Gold Palace (2022 winner)

Victor | Liveta (2021 winner)

Sangwoo | Semantic Error

Seon-Woo | Punch Drunk Love

Yeonwu | Banana Scandal

And the winner is...

SEON-WOO | PUNCH DRUNK LOVE

He really stole my heart with his hilarious daydreams and fantasies, but I grew to love this character even more because of his sweet (yet sexually charged) nature and the fact that he's genuine and earnest. So cute and just an overall unique character ♡

.

✰ FAVORITE TOP

And the nominees are...

Giovanni | Hold Me Tight (2021 winner)

Dooshik | Pearl Boy

Ash | Define the Relationship

Juwon | High Clear

Yoonseul | The Third Ending

And the winner is...

GIOVANNI | HOLD ME TIGHT

Giovanni again!! ♡ It was super tough to choose from this list of amazing men but as I've said many, many times, Giovanni has my whole heart. I simply love him.

Like a lot of the tops on this list (I love the green flags the most ♡) he's different from the typical top who's a company president/director. He doesn't care about money, power, or really anything else except the ones he loves - which is mainly just Felix. One of my favorite things about Giovanni is that he'll drop absolutely anything to go to Felix's side, no questions asked. And sometimes a few questions would be a good thing.

.

✰ FAVORITE COUPLE

And the nominees are...

Dooshik & Jooha | Pearl Boy (2021 and 2022 winner)

Skylar & Cirrus | Lost in the Cloud

Taeman & Dahyeok | Killer Crush

Sangwoo & Jaeyoung | Semantic Error

Sasaki & Miyano | Sasaki and Miyano

Woo-won & Seo-an | The Pizza Delivery Man & the Gold Palace

And the winner is...

DOOSHIK & JOOHA | PEARL BOY

Dooshik & Jooha again!! ♡ It was so hard to choose from this list!! But if you've read Pearl Boy, you know these two are the epitome of ride or die. On top of that, they're also so many other things, like adorable, awkward, funny, silly, and incredibly sexy. I absolutely LOVED their awkward and silly beginning and both of their determination throughout the story to be with each other and care for each other ♡♡

(Yes I have six in this category but I couldn't take any of these off the list!!)

.

✰ FAVORITE SIDE COUPLE

And the nominees are...

Potato & Heesung | Jinx

Sys & Randolph | King's Maker: Triple Crown

Deisel & Ein | Wolf in the House

Taeman & Da-hyuk | Killer Crush

Seo & Do-Hyeok | My Suha (side chapters)

And the winner is...

SEO & DO-HYEOK | MY SUHA (SIDE CHAPTERS)

I'm kind of surprised this won, but I can't lie. I ate these side chapters up. Every week I looked forward to seeing if these two were going to fight, f*ck, or fight while f*cking. I didn't think it would end so soon and abruptly. I was also hoping for a different ending. But I'm happy we got this story in the first place because I don't think anyone expected these two characters to interact, I'm glad we got to see it. And maybe we'll see more of them someday? A girl can dream.

.

✰ COUPLE I MOST WANT TO BE IN A THROUPLE WITH

And the nominees are...

Our Sunny Days

Define the Relationship

The Pizza Delivery Man and The Gold Palace

Pearl Boy

Hold Me Tight

And the winner is...

DEFINE THE RELATIONSHIP

:'( Sadly none of these will become a reality, but if I could choose a relationship to be welcomed into with open arms, it would be with these two beautiful men. Two alphas? Are you kidding me? Two alphas, one top one bottom... yes please!!

.

✰ FAVORITE MAIN CHARACTER

And the nominees are...

Seon-Woo | Punch Drunk Love

Juwon | High Clear

Yoonseul | The Third Ending

Taeman | Killer Crush

Shin | Shutline

And the winner is...

TAEMAN | KILLER CRUSH

Taeman ♡♡♡ we've got ourselves a killer / babygirl! Really the perfect example of 'get you a man who can do both.' He'll kill a wild boar to save you no sweat then cuddle up on the couch and watch a movie with you. He's shy and blushes a lot, he's also calm, cool, and collected when he needs to be. He is everything to me ♡ Looking forward to re-reading Killer Crush soon before the next season comes out!!

.

✰ FAVORITE SIDE CHARACTER

And the nominees are...

Deisel | Wolf in the House

Woojin | Lucky Paradise

Sys | King's Maker: Triple Crown

Heesung | Jinx

Potato | Jinx

And the winner is...

SYS | KING'S MAKER / KING'S MAKER: TRIPLE CROWN

Where do I start? I love him ♡ I love everything about him. I love his cuteness and his cheerful energy. I fucking love his dom side, his choice of outfits for himself and others, his taste in men. What an icon. I'm sure I'll have much more to say after actually reading season 3.

.

✰ FAVORITE BOY

And the nominees are...

Kim Dan | Jinx

Dooshik | Pearl Boy

Giovanni | Hold Me Tight

Yoonseul | The Third Ending

Juwon | High Clear

And the winner is...

JUWON | HIGH CLEAR

I love this boy so much! So cute, so funny, incredibly awkward, and so freaking sexy. I love his tough energy in the beginning and his more recent soft top energy. His chibis kill me every single time. And I think it's well known by now that characters with red hair like this are my weakness (>ω<)

.

✰ FAVORITE TOXIC BL

And the nominees are...

Twittering Birds Never Fly

Low Tide in Twilight

Jinx

Under the Green Light

My Suha (side chapters)

And the winner is...

TWITTERING BIRDS NEVER FLY

How can I not choose Twittering Birds when I've been obsessed with it for like 3 years? I re-read it a few months ago and cannot get enough of these two. I love it. I need more. I pray for a happy ending - though not anytime soon. I cannot get enough of their tension and the recent chapters!!!! ⁂((✪o✪))⁂ I'm so excited to see what we'll see from them this year.

.

✰ SUING FOR EMOTIONAL DAMAGE

And the winner is...

PEARL BOY

I bawled my eyes out after seeing one tiktok of these two. The ending... while technically happy... had me in tears. Really, I was in distress throughout the entire series. And also the ending could have been happier and more clear in my opinion. But was it all worth it? Yes. Would I do it again? Ideally I would read it all in one go, but still yes.

.

✰ FAVORITE NEW BL

And the winner is...

OUR SUNNY DAYS

Ahhhhhhh!!! I'm so happy about this new BL!! So wholesome, so cute, SO FUNNY!! Not even 10 chapters in and I already adored all three of them. So much warmth ♡ I would read 100+ chapters about them just going about their daily lives.

The author apologized in chapter 22(?) because we had to wait so long for spicier chapters - first, I did not once feel like I was waiting too long for spicy chapters, I wasn't even thinking about that, I was just happy and second, dear author, you never have to apologize for anything, you're creating a masterpiece here. I already know it's going to be one of my all time favorites ♡♡♡

.

✰ FAVORITE ONGOING BL

And the winner is...

SEKAI-ICHI HATSUKOI / THE WORLD'S GREATEST FIRST LOVE: THE CASE OF RITSU ONODERA

Oh my god... I read this for the first time this year, not expecting much but to my surprise I enjoyed every second of it 0_0

It was just so fun! Ritsu was hilarious and relatable (minus the nepotism), maybe controversial, but I love Takano ♡ That man just wants Ritsu's love, he's got it so bad.

I loved reading about all of the side characters and couples too ♡♡ I will be reading Junjou Romantica and then re-reading this and then probably watching both animes. And by then, maybe, finally, Ritsu will have confessed.

.

✰ FAVORITE BL THAT ENDED THIS YEAR

And the winner is...

HOLD ME TIGHT, BANANA SCANDAL, -AND- SEMANTIC ERROR

I couldn't decide!!! How was I supposed to decide between these three??? There were so many great BLs that ended this year (ノAヽ)

Hold Me Tight - Wow, 194 episodes and I would have kept reading as far as the author wanted to go. This one has a special place in my heart because I remember exactly where I was when I started it and binged probably the whole first season. I've since re-read the entire thing, and despite how long it is, I was so sad when I got to the last chapter. One of my all time favorites. I love Giovanni and Felix so much ♡♡ I love their love ♡♡ (Leegang was my favorite side character). Funny, heartwarming, loving, wholesome ♡

Banana Scandal - I am so so SO glad that we got a season 3 ♡ Even with 190 episodes, similarly, I would have read three more seasons. I loved Taehee and Dojin in season one so much, but Yeonwoo and Taehwan stole my heart just as much at the end of season 2 and in season 3!! I will definitely be re-reading this again ♡ and recommending it forever. Sweet, funny, cute, love these boys ♡

Semantic Error - which just ended like last week it feels like. I'm so sad seeing this one end right now, I want to see more of Sangwoo and Jaeyoung ♡ I feel like there was some more to tell - I'm really hoping for a few side chapters. But overall, duh, I LOVED reading this. So funny, had me hooked from the very beginning. Enjoyed the art style, the concept, and of course the characters ♡♡ I will be re-reading this one again someday. And maybe checking out the novel...

For all of these and other ones that ended this year, I'll be so excited to read future works by these authors!!! ♡♡♡

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✰ FAVORITE BL OF 2023

And the winner is...

SASAKI AND MIYANO -AND- HIRANO AND KAGIURA

I cheated again and included both of these for best of 2023! I think we all know why and know that I couldn't possible choose one over the other.

Sasaki & Miyano I started in the beginning of 2022 and immediately read Hirano and Kagiura after I caught up and also immediately watched the anime. And now we have a movie!

In addition to being an adorable and wholesome romance, both of these were hilarious. Miyano is my favorite, and one of my favorite panels of him is when he called Hirano an uke to his face ʱªʱªʱª(ᕑᗢूᓫ∗) Miyano you crazy fudanshi!!

The tension with both of these couples!! So freaking soft ♡ and the way I know we're all screeching at just hand holding and little touches is delightful ♡

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Thank you for reading!

[neonscandal]

Can I ask from this ask game : https://www.tumblr.com/toomanyfandomsthings/749729499738996736/send-me-a-ship-and-a-number-and-ill-tell-you?source=share

No. 2, 10, 11, 12, 15 for SatoSugu, BakuDeku, AshEiji and MatchaBlossom.....Thanks 🌻

Hello, friend 🧡 I love asks like these because I have to put so much more creative thought into them haha so thank you for asking. 🌻 I also love the idea that we don't need to know who the best cook is because it's very apparent in all of these ships 😂

What their love letters look like: Selfies. Constant selfies. Mission selfies. Bored between mission selfies. Words aren't always needed but every pic has an implied "I'm still here, we're still The Strongest."

What TV shows they watch together, and which ones they hide from the other: Gojo is so incredibly lacking in self awareness that he is impervious to the idea that anything he watches is at all embarrassing. They watch The Great British Bake-Off together and Gojo always loudly laments when the objective involves something savory instead of sweet.

What their first impression was of each other: Gojo thought "Bangs." Geto thought "The audacity of this guy."

What they would change about each other: Gojo wouldn't change a thing, even the things that might feel a bit irksome, things work the way they are and he's happy, so happy. Geto has a laundry list of things he wish he could change: Gojo's feral gremlin energy, his constant sweet tooth, the brash way he speaks which always embarrasses Geto but he accepts these things, too. He likes to pull them out in a fight though (in jest).

What their love letters look like: Twin. Merch. Midoriya would give Bakugo the last of some exclusive All Might merch even though it would pain him. Bakugo would go to the ends of the earth to make sure Midoriya wouldn't go without.

What TV shows they watch together, and which ones they hide from the other: Hero documentaries, biopics and, of course, the midnight release of any new All Might movies. Bakugo hides that he is also a Real Heroes of Musutafu trash reality tv watcher. 👀 As nosy as he is, its a guilty pleasure.. but not a secret he keeps well.

What their first impression was of each other: Midoriya was timid and reserved and Bakugo was loud and a bit abrasive so, despite being rough around the edges, Midoriya knew immediately "Kacchan sugoi!". Bakugo wanted Midoriya to be an extra so. bad. He was the only person bold enough to also want to be All Might when they played Heroes vs Villains on the playground and, while that initially grated him, over time it won him over. Man, was that short lived.

What they would change about each other: They both find one another to be self-sacrificial idiots but are completely incapable of seeing how that's just another one of their similarities. Bakugo also wishes Midoriya could be less of an insufferable fanboy but only because he, himself, could never be so brave to be so aggressively different or outside of the norm.

What their love letters look like: Postcards, handwritten letters, tokens of their travels both far and wide. Just the bread crumbs they leave and scatter for one another until they can unite once more. Eiji scrapbooks them but he'd never tell Ash.

What TV shows they watch together, and which ones they hide from the other: They're always behind when it comes to cult classic shows. But they really enjoy Stranger Things. I think Ash, in particular, has a soft spot for Joyce Byers but he'd never say that out loud. Eiji also suspiciously watches the evolution of Steve Harrington's hair as Ash's mysteriously changes in tandem. Eiji would never tell Ash about any of the anime he watches whenever he has some alone time. Ash already accuses him of being more interested in the comics than the news, he would never hear the end of it. But he's super pumped about the Blue Lock movie and rationalizes that it's basically like watching football on Sunday when he's inevitably caught binging the anime ahead of the cinematic release.

What their first impression was of each other: They were both intrigued by one anothers' fearlessness. Eiji never shied away from the big, bad gang leader. Ash was a beacon of nonchalant confidence when Eiji was at a point of listlessness and self doubt. They were both intrigued.

What they would change about each other: Eiji would change Ash's.. morning disposition in a heartbeat. Something about having to fight someone just to get them out of bed is so unnerving, especially as their breakfast gets cold in the interim. Ash, on the other hand, wouldn't change a thing. There's a very delicate balance between them that enables him to tease Eiji about absolutely everything. Why risk jeopardizing that??

What their love letters look like: Lighthearted challenges to determine innocuous things between them. "First person to the couch gets to pick the movie!" "Bet you I can piss Shadow off first!" Just little competitions to keep things interesting because they are nothing if not extraordinary and have a constant need to prove that to one another.

What TV shows they watch together, and which ones they hide from the other: Joe is really passionate about cooking and competitive so he loves watching Hell's Kitchen and Iron Chef and telling Kaoru how he'd dominate on either show. Kaoru huffs and rolls his eyes half-heartedly but also has a massive crush on Mark Dacascos having been a captive audience for several seasons of Iron Chef (who wouldn't?) so he allows these selfish preferences. Also, when they're fighting, he wonders if Gordon Ramsay could, in fact, make Joe cry. Joe insists he could not.

What their first impression was of each other: Joe was a goodie two shoes who happened to be able to hold his own on a skateboard but Kaoru thought he was a bit too bashful, a bit too reserved. Kaoru was a rebel and an artist on a board before Carla took the guesswork out of everything. Even so, Joe was awe-inspired by the Cherry, the spitfire.

What they would change about each other: Kaoru wishes Joe wasn't such a needy gorilla aka that he wasn't so showy and drawing the attention of fan girls and boys alike because he gets a bit jealous. Like, "yes, you're hot. That's why we're dating now put your shirt back on, people are staring, you dolt." Somehow it never comes out that straightforward though. Re: Joe, it's infrequent but sometimes Joe wishes Kaoru would return his affection in similar measure, just as loud and proud. Even though he thinks that'd be nice, he can't help but relish in those isolated moments where Kaoru, in his own way, demonstrates his affection. Those moments where the stars align just so, the wind blows in just the right direction and all of Kaoru's walls crumble. He wears a smile so warm, so genuine that Joe thinks it is worth all the banter in between such moments.

[stesierra]

I am posting this again (my pride and joy) because now I know how to do that read more thing so all the people who hate long chunks of text don't want to kill me! Also, last time I didn't put up the full first chapter! So... Here it is again.

The Bone Queen

Chapter 1

When I fell in love with Aubrey, I never thought I'd dream of killing him one day. Why would I? He was already dead.

Now, two years after he’d won my heart with lies, we stood alone in my dimly lit parlor, between its lion-footed couches all in pine green and gold and blood red, Queen Idony’s colors. The golden tapestries that thickly coated the walls depicted Bandrum Palace as seen from the streets of Asteraxe: a many-floored edifice that sprawled across the top of a hill, half hidden behind a mighty wall.

The enormous skirts of my dress weighed me down like I was dragging my own casket around. The bodice hugged my ribs and the corset I didn't need, embellished with lace and embroidered birds, and the sleeves poofed around my skinny arms. It left my scrawny shoulders bare, and even with the fire that crackled in my fireplace, the winter air inside the palace chilled me.

The dress was ivory. The same ivory as my fiancé’s bones.

He clenched my hand, his icy finger bones pinching my skin, and his touch revolted me. But I didn't draw away. I'd learned by now that there was no escape. What point was there in trying? Besides, I deserved this unhappiness. I'd brought it upon myself. Upon the entire kingdom of Sweelough.

When I'd met Aubrey, he'd been nothing but a handsome ghost on Lake Langlyn’s shores. But since I'd freed him—freed them all—he’d become something more. Not alive, even Queen Idony couldn't do that, but she'd given him back his skeleton with which to wield swords and write notes and touch my vulnerable skin. His ghost hadn't gone anywhere; it wrapped around his skeleton like transparent flesh around bones. Now, when I looked into his face, I saw both sharp gray eyes and yawning sockets, both a full, cleanshaven mouth and a skull’s grinning teeth. And the clothes his ghost wore echoed the very real doublet and hose he'd pulled over his bones. Green and red and gold, of course. He honored the queen in everything he did.

He bent close to me, brushing the top of my fashionable tower of hair with his jawbone. He stank of potpourri and dust. “Tell me you love me, Elise.”

I said nothing, just breathed and thought about hitting his bones over and over again with a hammer. In my mind, he crumbled into bits, nothing but ashes in a grave. Of course, it was a fantasy; no one could kill someone who was already dead. I knew because so many people had died trying. Because I had hit him with an axe down on the shore of Lake Langlyn, and it had only torn his clothes.

He said again, “We are to marry in a month. Tell me you love me. Smile at me and say my name, the way you used to.”

“Aubrey,” I said. I didn't love him, but what good would it do to tell him again, when he would only yell at me? It was pointless. Everything was pointless.

His ghostly eyes narrowed, and he crushed my hands in his. “Smile, Elise. Thank me for taking you to wife. For when we met, you were nothing but a serf too stupid to write her own name. Now look at you. Aren't you grateful?”

Tears stung my eyes. When I'd met him, at sixteen, I'd been happy. I'd had parents and four brothers who loved me, and it hadn't mattered that none of us knew how to read or write. What did farmers need letters for? Now, two years later, life was meaningless, and it didn't matter that the tutors he'd forced on me had taught me to scribble my name and read a handful of poems.

Aubrey sighed and leaned down to kiss the back of my hand. For a horrifying second, his lips passed through me, and his teeth brushed my skin. “I'm sorry, Elise. I know I push you too hard. You'll be a good wife. Docile and obedient. Quiet. A good mother to my children.”

If I was docile and quiet, it was only because I'd given up. But his last sentence made me whip my head up. “Children? What do you mean, children?”

He smiled up at me, his spectral mouth matching the grinning teeth of his skull. “Why, Elise, didn't you think I would want a heir?”

“Why would you?” I cried. “Lady Kinburg tells everyone how she had no choice but to hang her descendents when she came back, because they wouldn't return her lands. The dead don't want heirs. You're planning to rule forever. Aren't you?”

“Of course,” my fiancé agreed, straightening up. “But I would still want children. Offspring who will love and admire me, just as you do.”

Unless they inherited my ability to see and hear ghosts, all the children would see was a skeleton that couldn't even talk to them. They wouldn't admire him. They'd fear him, just like I did. Somehow, that didn't matter, not when there was a bigger issue. “Aubrey, you're dead. You can't sire children. It's impossible. Are you planning to have some living man bed me?”

He scoffed, reaching up to seize my chin. “I'll kill any man who lays a finger on you. You're mine. Forever.”

I ripped my face out of his grip. “If we adopt children, they won't be able to see you.” No other living person in Asteraxe, the capital of Sweelough, saw and heard the dead like I did. They just saw skeletons, awful and deadly. It was my gift and my curse to see more. A curse that had doomed me and all of Sweelough.

He let me retreat to sit upon one of the couches. “But children born of your body will, my love. And it's not impossible. Do you have so little faith in the queen? In one month, on the day of our wedding, she will cast spells upon me to give me the ability to lie with you. With her magic, she'll quicken my seed in your belly. And nine months later, you'll bear me a perfect son.”

Aubrey was going to have sex with me. He was going to force me to bear his child. My thoughts ran in terrified, anguished circles. My limbs grew weak, and I sank into my couch. I wanted to vomit all over his pointed shoes. If I could've, I'd have bolted out into the halls of the palace and straight out the front doors. Running for my life had never sounded more appealing.

But the queen's magic brand wrapped my ankle like a jagged red tattoo, and even now I felt it burning against my skin. She'd promised me, when she enchanted me two years ago, that if I ever tried to escape, it would punish me. And Aubrey had stood beside her, smiling because I could never leave him.

“You look faint, my love,” Aubrey said, stepping up close to me. “Come to dinner tonight. Sit at my side and display your beauty to all the court.”

“I'm not hungry,” I said, and it was true. I was never hungry, and after the horrible news he’d just dropped on me, I might never be hungry again. If I accompanied Aubrey to the Great Hall, where the nobility gathered over feasts of roast beef and fish and fresh fruit, I would only sit uneating in front of plenty, just like all the dead who wanted to pretend that they were still alive. Aubrey couldn't eat, being nothing but bones. I had a stomach and all the equipment needed, but I'd lost my appetite with my family, and now that he’d threatened to impregnate me, it was doubly gone.

He took my hand and kissed it again. “Very well. I will send your maids in to tend to you. But after dinner, I will come fetch you. Queen Idony wishes to speak with you.”

My stomach dropped, and I tore my hand out of his. “What? Why? I haven't done anything wrong.”

He patted my cheek, and his bones were so cold that surely they'd never belonged to a living man. “Fear not, Elise. She doesn't want to punish you. She merely wishes to tell you your new duties in the days ahead.”

“Duties? What duties?” Dread constricted my throat. Duties, whatever they were, would take me away from my rooms and safety. They'd put me in the eyes of the living nobles, and all of them hated me. Not because I was a peasant pretending to be one of them. Because it was my fault they had to bow to a dead queen. I didn't blame them. I hated me too.

Aubrey beamed at me. “Great events are on the horizon. Do you remember that the queen made overtures to our wealthy neighbor to the west?”

Only one county bordered Sweelough to the west. “Ahheleisa. But you said nothing would come of it. That the living were too superstitious to see a gift when the queen offered it.”

He waved a hand. “The living are cretins. But in this case, I was wrong.”

“I’m still alive, Aubrey,” I reminded him. For now. Every other night, I woke from nightmares that the queen had stripped me down to nothing but a ghost and dry old bones.

“Yes, yes. That doesn't matter. We have news now that an ambassador and his party are coming here to Asteraxe. In fact, they are nearly upon us. And so Queen Idony has plans for you. But she’ll tell you the details tonight, I am sure.” He patted my leg through my layers of skirts and petticoats. “Now, promise me you'll eat something.”

“I'll eat something,” I lied. But after he'd left and sent my maids in to check on me, I tilted my head back and closed my eyes and tried to think of nothing. Thoughts kept sneaking in of a dead man's touch and a dead man's children, and I had no peace at all.

My maids haunted the room for a while, waiting for me to make my will known. When I said nothing, Amphelisia asked tentatively, “Can we fetch you something from the kitchen, my lady?”

I opened my eyes and looked at them. To anyone else living, the three of them would look identical: three skeletons in humble black dresses that covered them from neck to ankle. They were lucky; they didn't have to wear enormous skirts that barely fit through a doorway, and since they were just maids, nobody required them to have towers of hair. The dead noblewomen wore wigs; my maids left their skulls bare except for tendrils of transparent hair.

To me, who could see ghosts, I couldn't possibly mistake one maid for another. Amphelisia’s face was round and as bright as her voice, Lettice’s face was angular and always vaguely worried, and Ysoria had a strong square jaw and a matter-of-fact tone that sometimes made me feel like a small child. Their names had been the height of fashion in Sweelough two hundred years ago, when Queen Idony had ruled for the first time, but no living woman had borne them in a hundred years.

When I didn't say anything, Ysoria said, “You got a present, my lady.” She held out a plain wooden box the size and thickness of my hand.

I stared at her. “From Aubrey?” No one else would send me anything, but he always gave me his presents in person. He'd presented me the necklace of gold and emeralds that currently weighed down my throat just last week, before worship. I took the box. It barely weighed a thing.

“The boy that delivered it didn’t say.”

“Then it’s not from Aubrey. He loves to put his name on things.” Things like me. I opened the box and peeked in.

A chain of silver skulls coiled inside, rubies where their eyes should be, just long enough for my wrist. I stared at it. No, this wasn’t from Aubrey. God knew Aubrey would never send me something to remind me he was already dead. This was a comment from somebody rich, but what sort of comment was it? A joke? An insult? A threat? It couldn’t just be from an admirer, not with those skulls.

“What should we do with it?” Lettice asked me.

I shrugged. “Put it with my other jewelry. I'll figure out where it came from later.”

“Later,” Ysoria agreed, snatching it out of my hands. “After you've had dinner. You can't skip anymore meals, Lady Cropper! You'll wither away to nothing.”

I sighed. “All right. Something green, though. I'm tired of eating twenty kinds of meat.”

Amphelisia wrung her hands. “But, my lady, that is how the nobility eats.”

“Well, I'm a peasant, and I miss vegetables.” I rubbed a hand across my eyes. “Please. Something green.”

“All right,” Ysoria said softly. “We'll be back with that in a jiffy. Why don't you work on your lessons? The Duke of Winworth will surely be pleased if you can read him a poem.”

I couldn't care less about whether Aubrey was pleased. But I picked up the poetry book that sat on the little table in between my couches and opened it to where a blue ribbon had preserved my place. Poetry was a woman's art in Sweelough, although everyone said that the poets who'd written the Book of Souls were men blessed by God. I'd never be holy enough to hold that book. Even if I hadn't been a peasant and nearly illiterate, I'd brought a war down on Sweelough, caused the death of thousands and gotten Queen Alma deposed. I never prayed to God or Othin anymore, even though I attended worship every Othiday. Why would either of them listen to me?

By the time Ysoria returned with a wooden trencher, I'd only read three lines of the poem and worked myself into an awful state. The juicy white pork on the trencher must have come from the royal cooks, but the winter cabbage and onions had probably been fixed for the servants. The nobles would never touch anything so pitiful. It was perfect, and I almost didn't mind that I wasn't hungry.

I shoved the book aside and took the trencher right there on the couch. The cabbage tasted a little bitter, but cabbage was like that sometimes.

My maids watched me eat as though it was the most fascinating thing in the world. I wished they'd say something. Anything to distract me from the awful process of swallowing.

On the last bite, my lips and tongue tingled and went numb. I could no longer tell if I still held the mouthful of cabbage. I spat it onto my trencher. The mush looked normal, but the numbness spread across my face, and my skin crawled all over my body as if it were about to rip free and drag itself away.

“Ysoria?” I slurred. “Something’s wrong.”

@anonymousfoz

@moremysteriesthantragedies

@elizababie

@sm-writes-chaos

@bellascarousel

[harukadrawsthings]

Japan (and many international viewers who watch the original audio) has just seen the end of an era that lasted a quarter of a century. I haven't watched the episode yet as I'm awaiting the release of the English subtitles tonight from the team responsible for the translation but I have no doubt I'll need a lot of tissues. But since the outcome is already known in the land of the rising sun I've decided to reveal my art tribute to Ash and Pikachu in T-Shirt format that I've been preparing for at least a month but was reserving it for today!

I vividly remember the moment when the Pokémon series premiered in Portugal in October 1999, when I was still at primary school, and introduced us to an ambitious 10 year old boy who fell asleep on the 1st day of his journey in pursuit of a dream and who at first did not get along well with his electric mouse partner. There wasn't a single child or teenager at that time that would be indifferent and wouldn't talk about that universe inhabited by hundreds of creatures with magical powers and how different that concept was in an animated series for that time (and in videogames too because there was also a rush to Nintendo's handheld consoles!).

I never imagined that 23 years later I would still be following this story of friendship and how remarkable the protagonist would be in my life after being with me almost the whole time. He was the one who introduced me to a franchise I'm a big fan of and that same exposure has influenced my artistic path. He decompressed me on the daily train journeys I had to make to college, making me laugh and go to class with determination and optimism. He has been my psychologist these past six years which have been particularly difficult for me and has been a major element in my emotional stability. I also owe thanks to Ash for several important life lessons he has given me along his journey by demonstrating his virtues such as kindness, honesty, helping and being tolerant of each other. I have very happy memories of waking up in the morning and watching his adventures on television before going to school, and of watching him in the evening on television in more recent years including the present time.

Portugal will still have Ash on the small screen until the end of this year and I will follow him to the end and wait for the local dubbing of the remaining episodes to be broadcast (and cry again with the disclosure of the Pokémon Ultimate Journeys and this special 11-episodes mini-series) and enjoy his company for a while longer. I will miss this duo that won my heart and of millions of viewers of several generations all over the world that we will certainly never forget and that their memory will be eternal. It was a privilege to watch this story as everything happened in the moment.

So this stamped illustration is a homage and a gesture of gratitude to one of the most influential and impactful characters ever in the history of Japanese animation and who leaves us a legacy that I hope future generations will come to know and recognise his cultural importance. You'll be forever a legend! 🧢⚡

Thank you, Ash Ketchum and Pikachu, and so long!

Do not repost. Do not modify. Always credit me!

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Art © HarukaDrawsThings

[musicfeedsmysoul12]

Ok first I hope your feeling better

And second I love pacts of power it’s definitely going to give the signs that this will be different from strings of fate since the kids are… actally dying in this? Like don’t get me wrong I don’t write the kids dying I can’t… really handle it unless it’s mineta (I had him get eaten by Rodan a couple of times lol) but this… it’s just feels different… canon is going to be way different and I’m excited about that

Also the cat… seriously I thought the cat was like happy from fairy tale

This dude… but the art I reblog I thought ok that’s is so so much better, I’m imagining Izuku just cuddles with them and the cat is so overprotective

Anyway can’t wait for the new chapter but I shall hope you feel better soon and don’t overwork yourself!

I'm mostly feeling better. Brain fog is still an issue and I can't focus a damn but I'm sleeping and not feeling as shitty. Did have to miss work which... fuck, but eh.

Yeah, POP is very different from POTSOD. POTSOD is where everything worked out well, and is fairly close to canon even if a lot of it gets yeeted. POP is me blowing canon up and dancing in the ashes mostly. Which makes the acronym very fitting actually. They won but the cost made it a loss anyway. Plus having a clearly defined pairing from the beginning is fun to work with to.

Yeah, nope! So far unnamed Familiar is a much prettier cat. I'm thinking a calico based off one of my parent's cats. She's a little witch but we love her even if she eats drywall.

I'm happy you're enjoying it! Right now my focus is on my health, more so since trying to focus hurts lol. Tried to answer some other asks and actually had to lay down for a bit plus doing homework gave me a headache I couldn't focus. This is more just "oh hey I can just regurgitate info".

[pokeworldrevisited]

Thank you Ash

Thanks for two decades of entertainment, thanks for all the wonderful stories we got to experience with you, thanks for letting us see the Pokemon world in a different way than the games do.

I may have dropped the anime back at Gen 5, but I'm still grateful that Ash was able to bring me in to the series that to this day, I still love. And it's not just me, but millions of people, watching Ash's journey, rooting for him every step of the way. We were happy when he won, and angry when he lost

(Especially when the reasons he lost were completely unfair, like Charizard sleeping, a hacker bringing legendaries to battle, haven't watched the Gen 5 league but I do know that Ash should have won against his opponent. That guy didn't know where the league was and thought he needed 5 badges to get in. Plus he lost the very next battle! Ash didn't deserve that!)

I still think that him leaving the anime is the best idea. But I also like that Ash doesn't just quit adventuring with his Pokemon. He's now the strongest trainer in the world, logically, there's not much you can do there in a writing perspective. Look at all the anime's with OP characters, it's very hard to make it engaging if there's no actual stakes.

But it's not an official goodbye. With Ash traveling the world and Pokemon Horizons taking place all over the Pokemon world, there's a slim chance that Ash will make reappearances here and there. So I don't think this'll be the last time we see Ash, this is just the last time we see him as the protagonist.

[macaroni-and-antifreeze]

sorry gang i'm on a writing roll so here is

Ash's Thoughts About Every Winner + A Bonus

Wife, this is your warning. Do not look under the cut. You will be spoiled for literally the entire series.

Also I do briefly mention self-harm towards the end so if that is a trigger for you, I would recommend either scrolling or not reading the massive paragraph at the end.

Dr. Will (BB2) - There's a reason he's an iconic winner. He's a bit of an asshole but he's a lovable asshole, much like my dad.

Lisa (BB3) - Now, do I think a bitter jury contributed to this win? Yes. Is this win still deserved? Yes. She was a strong player in her own right and I'm still happy she won.

Jun (BB4) - One of my favorite winners. Basically invented the floater strategy that other houseguests try and fail to replicate to this day.

Drew (BB5) - Honestly, I have not dived very far into this mid-stage of the old seasons but I guess he's okay.

Maggie (BB6) - Not a big fan of her, tbh.

Mike Boogie (BB7) - There's a lot of shit that happened outside of the game that sours my opinion of him.

Evil Dick (BB8) - Ok, listen. He's a character I can say that much. But, there was a lot of production protection around his win. I don't think he would've gotten as far without America's Player.

Adam (BB9) - I haven't watched BB9, and I probably won't.

Dan (BB10) - What can I say about Dan that hasn't already been said? He is a BB legend and probably the best winner.

Jordan (BB11) - Yeahhhh, no.

Hayden (BB12) - I have conflicting thoughts about Hayden. Is he kinda responsible for Derrick? Yes. Is he entertaining to watch? Yes.

Rachel (BB13) - Ok I gotta admit, I'm not the biggest fan of her in 13, love her in 12 though.

Ian (BB14) - Ian is my favorite, if you have anything negative to say about him fuckin leave.

Andy (BB15) - I refuse to watch BB15.

Derrick (BB16) - See my future "Derrick Levasseur Ruined Big Brother & I Don't Respect Him As A Person" longpost.

Steve (BB17) - I am extremely biased towards Steve. BB17 was the first season I watched and the first to make me fall in love with Big Brother. If you asked my dad, he would say Vanessa was robbed. And I kind of agree, but also don't. We didn't have good enough internet for the feeds at the time so there's a lot of shit we missed.

Nicole (BB18) - I hate Nicole Franzel. I am tired of seeing and hearing her and I do not care if she lives or dies.

Josh (BB19) - 19 was a garbage dump as a season which makes it only fair to get a garbage dump of a winner. Only Kevin winning would satisfy me because he was the only bright spot in this hellhole of a season.

Kaycee (BB20) - Honestly, I don't give a rat's ass about this season. I was on Discord most of the summer so I didn't get to connect with a lot of the players.

Jackson (BB21) - Why do we award racists? I only watched the first half of the season because I was so angry.

Cody (BB22) - The only good thing he did was evict Nicole. This season made me stop watching until midway through BB24 because all of the Pre-Derrick players were evicted for trying to, yknow, play the fucking game how it was meant to be played. So tired of white boys.

Xander (BB23) - I have not gone back & watched BB23 in its entirety due to certain events in my life happening at that time because I fear it may trigger me and ruin my excitement for Big Brother.

Taylor (BB24) - It's what she deserves. She is 2 in my top 3 favorite winners, those being Ian, Taylor, and Lisa.

Jag (BB25) - I don't think you should win if you were evicted, but that's my opinion.

And finally, our bonus player:

Paul (BB18 & 19) - I have incredibly mixed feelings on Paul. When they played in 18, I thought they were the greatest person on Earth. They were cool and funny and had awesome style. And to an autistic middle schooler who couldn't keep up with the changing tides of the social hierarchy, they meant a lot to me because we were already very similar. So I mirrored them. I mirrored them HARD. They were everything I wanted to be as a person. Instead of being the kid who got bullied all the time, I could be cool. To this day, Paul is a really special houseguest to me because they provided an escape from the newly developing self-hatred and urge to harm myself. I'm older and healthier now, so I don't value my worth against people but they were a bright spot in a dark time in my life.

Then BB19 came along. And I felt betrayed.

Why was the person I looked up to suddenly acting like the very thing I was escaping from? It genuinely hurt a lot. And because of those feelings that still linger today, I still feel like that 12 year old "girl" who didn't know what was wrong with them whenever I see clips of Paul on BB19.

Thank you for your time. See yall on Thursday.

[veliseraptor]

What's your favourite Xue Yang scene?

don't even want to look at when this one was sent so I won't.

but also how am I even supposed to choose? all of Xue Yang's scenes are my favorite scenes and this is made harder by the fact that there aren't actually all that many of them, so even if I were to go with, like, top five, I could arguably cover all of them in it depending on how I stretch the definition of "scene."

and I am going to go ahead and stretch that definition to go with "everything from when Xiao Xingchen stabs him through to Xue Yang's first resurrection attempt's failure" because OH BOY is that just! a lot! happening there! seriously remains one of the most emotionally devastating parts of the entire show for me.

actually, you know what? since I haven't gotten all up in my feelings about this for a while why don't I go ahead and get up in my feelings about it again!!!

so right off the bat I'm just, you know. feeling things. about Xue Yang, who has just ridden a full rollercoaster of "uh oh, that's a song lan shaped problem who's here to kill me" to "hey this is going pretty well actually!" to "oh shit that played out so perfectly, we fucking on the murder tableau tonight" and a whole high of combined relief (because he gets to keep his life and this life despite thinking it was over for a hot minute there), victory (he won, take that Song-daozhang) and just fucking sheer satisfaction about the perfection of the fact that he won because Xiao Xingchen killed his best friend and he doesn't know it (and I think in Xue Yang's head at this point, doesn't need to! that can be Xue Yang's own private little joke, it's not like it matters now).

the single greatest threat to Xue Yang's happy domestic fantasy is out of the picture and things are going great. :D

and then at some point, a-Qing presumably spills the beans to Xiao Xingchen, and Xue Yang comes back from away to a sword in the stomach and a very pissed off, distressed, and confused Xiao Xingchen, who has to be, yeah, freaking the fuck out and extremely confused and kind of panicking already, because, well. understandable reasons, rather.

and I think the thing that kills me about the whole rapidly deteriorating conversation between Xue Yang and Xiao Xingchen here is the fact that...initially, Xue Yang doesn't even seem all that upset, or at least not all that angry.

but then Xiao Xingchen says a few things that very clearly really get to Xue Yang, and by that I specifically mean that hurt him, and you can kind of...see the transition from Xue Yang making a bid for Xiao Xingchen's understanding to going back to familiar ground of "what do we do when people hurt us? oh yes, hurt them back and also worse."

what seems to push him over the line is a combination of Xiao Xingchen's dismissal (from Xue Yang's perspective) of his point-of-view and, I think more significantly, the significance of his suffering, and Xiao Xingchen's calling him 'disgusting.' I have...a whole lot more feelings about why that specifically, but that does seem to be the tipping point where Xue Yang goes from arguing defensively to very much on the offensive.

and Xue Yang has some very good weapons at his disposal.

so from there until he reveals Song Lan's presence, Xue Yang is riding the sensation of, again, winning - Xiao Xingchen hurt him, now Xiao Xingchen is hurting, good, that's how it's supposed to be, that feels better. Xiao Xingchen, meanwhile, is having everything he believed he'd managed to build, the good he'd managed to accomplish and the family he'd managed to make from the ashes of his previous mission, was (a) a hideous lie and (b) involved him committing a whole lot of murder.

I don't think it matters to Xiao Xingchen a whole lot that he was manipulated/tricked into it. All that matters to him is that he was tricked, and that he did do it. His good intentions don't matter - just as his good intentions didn't matter the first time around. His good intentions have never mattered, he's accomplished nothing since leaving the mountain - worse than nothing, he's done nothing but actively cause harm.

he insists that Xue Yang is lying even though I think he doesn't believe it himself because he doesn't want to believe that it's true, but even at that point, and even if it stopped there, I think Xiao Xingchen was already crumbling. not even getting into the fact that I think part of what's ruining Xiao Xingchen so badly is the fact that he loved his friend! he cared about him! the right thing to do here is pretty unquestionably to kill Xue Yang, but Xiao Xingchen doesn't. I don't think he can.

and that's before Song Lan gets introduced to the situation.

and meanwhile Xue Yang, who has never heard of the word "overkill," just keeps going, hammering at Xiao Xingchen's doubts and insecurities and weaknesses, and I think some of that continued battering has to do with the fact that as long as he's focused on wrecking Xiao Xingchen's entire everything he doesn't have to deal with how he's feeling about any of this. Detonating a nuclear bomb in the middle of your own relationship is fun as long as you don't immediately notice that you were in the blast radius at the time.

Xiao Xingchen, utterly demoralized, despairing, mentally and emotionally demolished, kills himself, unable to conceive of anything else he can do; there's no way out but out, and nothing lost by his doing so.

Xue Yang's laughter cuts off so fast when he notices Xiao Xingchen drop, as does his smile.

when he goes down to his knees next to him, his hands are shaking. but it's okay! this is salvageable!

I think what kills me most about Xue Yang's first go at resurrecting Xiao Xingchen is how calm he is about it. He's methodical and careful and meticulous, cleaning off Xiao Xingchen's hands (and presumably the rest of him), replacing his soiled bandage with a clean one, setting everything up and then, it seems, double-checking it. He's got this! Everything is under control! he dusts off his hands and cheerfully makes them both dinner, setting it up to be ready when Xiao Xingchen wakes up. This Is Going to Work.

it's not about the delusion, for me; sure, you can talk about what it means that Xue Yang is so very convinced that things can just go back to normal. but honestly for me it's the fact that Xue Yang's determined normalcy makes me very much think of the "this is fine" dog - he is on some level well aware that everything is on fire and awful and not going to just be fixed by resurrecting Xiao Xingchen but also no he isn't.

the fact that he pauses before eating the candy (the last piece of candy Xiao Xingchen gave him), for one, makes me think that there's already a touch of hesitation under that veneer of confidence that isn't as sure of himself as Xue Yang is pretending to be.

and of course then it doesn't work, Xiao Xingchen doesn't wake up, and Xue Yang very quickly rockets from the denial stage of grief through anger and into bargaining. his increasingly desperate pleas for Xiao Xingchen to wake up or else like he can just...threaten him alive again? because that's how Xue Yang knows how to interact with people. that's how he knows how to get what he wants.

violence is the only tactic that has reliably worked for Xue Yang for his whole life, and now he's in a situation where it isn't working at all and he can't deal with it. I doubt Xue Yang has ever grieved before, and this is the moment where it hits him like a high-speed train.

for someone who can be fairly described as "feral" and "a loose cannon", Xue Yang is in fact most of the time very much in control, at least in terms of himself. when he kills people it's because he meant to do it; when he hurts someone it's intentional, when he loses his temper it's because he didn't try to restrain it. Xiao Xingchen broke earlier, just before he died; this is the moment that breaks Xue Yang, and after this I don't think, barring a very surprising resurrection, there was any way he'd come back from it.

there's some lines in a fic that I wrote but haven't posted (yet) that goes:

He wondered what in heaven Xiao Xingchen had done, to change him so much. How he, with how much Xue Yang had hated him, had managed to reach into Xue Yang and unearth something all but forgotten, that had left an open, bleeding wound when it was torn away.

He wasn’t sure if he was impressed or angry.

and sometimes I do wonder what Xiao Xingchen would make of the Xue Yang-shaped mess he left behind when he died. absolutely there's one thing I think he'd regret most: abandoning a-Qing. but aside from that...I do wonder what he'd think of what his death did to Xue Yang. I don't think he'd find it satisfying, I can say that. I think he'd just find it sad.

which it is, and I'm crying about it.

[what-do-1000-swords-look-like]

I’m not sure if you ever addressed this before but do you think Dany was “mad” in the end or full in charge of her faculties? I mean the last scene where she is so excited after literally Incinerating civilians makes me think she really is out of her mind. However, everything up to that point seems par for the course Dany. (Burning food/captives, threatening people)The real person she always was just taken to her full intent against people we knew not just mummers dragons such as slavers.

Hey, Nonnie! I'll be honest, I don't remember if I have before but no worries at all, I'll definitely go into it here. =)

With Dany in the end, I'm very much of the opinion that she was in complete charge of her faculties. When she makes the decision she does in 8x05, she is very much in control and of sound mind. D&D themselves said she decides "to make it personal" and that also indicates to me that she wasn't mad.

As far as the "mad queen" arc goes, I think it was split between Dany and Cersei. Those two had far too many parallels to each other (Sansa was also paralleled with them but also had enough contrast to set her apart from them in the end) and to the Mad King himself. Cersei blowing up the Sept is a prime example. While I don't think she was mad per se, and it was a very calculated move, her reaction to the event and being willing to kill however many innocent people along with her enemies reminds me of Aerys a bit. I get her motivation and it's definitely true to her character but that to me was walking that line a bit. As well as her goading Dany by executing Missandei when Drogon was sitting right there. All perfectly explainable for political and war and character reasons, but also makes you go 'hmm'. That's one of the things I love about this story so much, everything is so wrapped up in layers, it's never just one thing. Very complex and rich that no matter how many times you unwrap it, there's still yet another layer you can find when you go back to it.

When Dany decides to burn KL to the ground, she is absolutely making a sound and very thought out choice. For seasons, we have not only been getting hints of what's to come but also once she's in Westeros, we constantly have Tyrion and Varys reminding her/pleading with her not to burn down KL. And we get her reactions to those warnings; she's not very pleased:

7x02 - Dany mentions that if Viserys had the dragons, he would have attacked KL already. Tyrion reminds her that she's not here to be Queen of the Ashes. Dany appears disappointed and puts down the token she's looking at, saying "No"

7x04 - Dany is angry when she loses her allies and wants to fly to KL with the dragons. Tyrion tells her that they have discussed this but she tells him this bs line of clarification (well it becomes bs later on I should say) "My enemies are in the Red Keep." (and the reason it's bs is because she makes this decision in 8x05 and then goes on to attack KL before she makes it to the Red Keep)

7x06 - Tyrion and Dany talk about Cersei & Dany wants to know if they are laying any traps for her. Tyrion tells her that he doesn't think deceit and mass murder is the best way to start a new world. "Which war is won without deceit and mass murder?" He agrees but reminds her that she wants to build a better world. When he asks if that's the kind of queen she wants to be, Dany very nearly rolls her eyes, gets up to walk away, and changes the subject.

8x04 - Tyrion tries to get her to agree to the blockade plan but when he fails, Jon then speaks up - she agrees but she is not happy about it

8x04 - when Varys begs her not to destroy KL, Dany makes that whole destiny speech. When Tyrion proposes an option, she says point blank "Speaking to Cersei will not prevent a slaughter." She eventually agrees to meet, but says "But perhaps it's good that the people see that Daenerys Targaryen made every effort to avoid bloodshed and Cersei Lannister refused. They should know who to blame when the sky falls down upon them." - she was determined to bring "fire and blood" to KL & as her MO, it's the "evil woman's" fault, not hers & "it was necessary"

8x05 - Tyrion tries to talk sense into Dany and keep her from massacring the city and sure enough, we get her response of "In Mereen, the slaves turned on the masters and liberated the city themselves after I arrived." When Tyrion tells her that the people are afraid to go against Cersei, that they're hostages, she says "They are. In a tyrant's grip. Whose fault is that? Mine?" Tyrion tries again to reach her and when he asks for her to give KL the chance to ring the bells to surrender, Dany is not happy but begrudgingly agrees (which we now know she was bs'ing & never intended to accept surrender)

Not to mention for seasons before this her mantra of "A dragon is not a slave" is completely about her. She doesn't like being forced to keep her patience, to not burn everyone alive who she views as evil or that displeases her. We even see that in season 5 in Mereen where she's being forced to be a Queen and rule. Daario says as much in season 6, telling her she's a conqueror, not a ruler. Then Olenna tells her to be a dragon in season 7. She was always looking to liberate the world and rule it all herself.

So for that reason, I absolutely do not believe Dany was mad or had lost her mind. I think part of the great tragedy of Dany's story is that she had been forewarned time and time again. She had ample time and teaching and experience, ample foreknowledge, to not make the same mistake as Aerys (which adds to that two-sided coin she is with Jon where he had to learn not to make the same mistakes as Ned and Robb; but that's the difference between them, he learned & she didn't). She had powerful resources at her disposal to actually make the world a better place, to be a good and benevolent ruler, and she had many people believing in her and that she could make it happen. But she still chose to go down this path, despite everything telling her not to. So she absolutely had her own agency in the end, and she definitely made her own choice. While I wish they hadn't rushed it and they had executed the end of her dark turn a bit better, to me, it absolutely played out the way it was always going to. Dany was always going to make that choice, one she couldn't come back from. Dany wanted to emulate Aegon the Conqueror so badly, felt it was her destiny even, but even Aegon (as brutal as he could be) left some people alive that he conquered to be ruled over. She was intent on destroying everyone who didn't do things her way and didn't show her the love she felt she deserved.

So to go back to that choice she makes, another reason I feel she is in control is because of the factors surrounding that moment of decision for her. The show purposely left in the sound of people in KL crying out for the bells to be rung so the bloodshed could stop. They purposely showed us how the Lannister army surrendered. Dany had won; she had conquered Cersei and her retinue. But it wasn't enough. And they showed that by everything visually and audibly surrounding this moment. It all goes back to "I don't have love here" and "People used to look at me like that, but never here. Never on this side of the sea." When she conquered across the sea, people rejoiced because she was killing "evil men". Here, they've seen a tyrant before. So she definitely made a choice.

As for her burning children, I hate to say it but that was always coming, too. I think if there was any madness on her part, which I hesitate to use that word but I guess it could be considered a type of delusion if you will, was her idea of her destiny. I think Tyrion puts it perfectly in 8x06 "And each time she became more sure that she is good and powerful and right." She is so set on liberating people from tyrants and yet she is one. It's not that she doesn't know she's a tyrant by the end, but she believes she's the right type of tyrant that the people need. She wants to break the wheel to install her own. And more importantly, she believes that she is entitled to the world her family had ruled over for centuries. She believes it's her birthright and that she truly is the Princess Who Was Promised. Despite how things with the NK went and that Arya ended up fulfilling that prophecy. Instead, Dany thinks she was the Queen Who Was Promised. She is the Dragon after all. Which, ironically Jorah even says in 7x07 "Dragons don't understand the difference between what is theirs and what isn't." So if I were to look at anything and think that she might be out of her mind with, it might be that.

And one other thing which you mentioned: her enjoyment/thrill of burning people alive aka her meting out her special brand of justice. I know you meant after the massacre (there were so many problems with that throne room scene dialogue she had; it negated her entire arc and kept her sympathetic to the GA; iirc I think I read somewhere that Emilia had insisted on the scene being changed which makes sense, she spent a decade of her life including two very serious medical events that happened playing this character, she was close to Dany and some might say too close tbf, but I get it) but it has definitely been there before. I remember when Viserys' death happened and Dany's stone cold expression. While Viserys was not a good guy, and he had just threatened her and her baby (not to mention the years of abuse she suffered previously), her lack of reaction to him being killed in such a brutal way, considering he was her last living relative, I remember that bothered some folks, as it should. Even D&D said that was a key moment for those to feel uncomfortable with for her, even back then.

So that's really the only two ways I could see some madness peeking through. Otherwise, no, I think she was of sound mind and very lucid. She knew exactly what she was doing when she made that decision in 8x05. If you look at the shots they showed us in 8x05, her attacks were very purposeful and targeted. Granted, once she made that choice, we never saw her POV again (we now know they did that on purpose thanks to Miguel Sapochnik's explanation) but from Arya's, Jon's, and everyone else's POV on the ground, we see how she purposely had Drogon lighting up the streets and from Cersei's POV, we also see how Dany is going from street to street in a pattern. She started near the gates and moved inwards, working her way towards the Red Keep, but making sure not to miss one street.

And even after she lit up the Red Keep, she went back to making sure that not one square inch had been missed. Even going so far as going back to the entrance of the city.

(Jon and the Northmen are retreating in that very direction, the same direction we see them return into the city again with Tyrion in 8x06 - she literally went back to make sure no one escaped KL/her wrath)

All very methodical, purposeful, and absolutely lucid.

In 8x05, when she does this, we see the true Dany that has been there all along, the one that was always hinted at but had been restrained/simmering under the surface. She was now unleashed. She was the dragon. And a dragon is not a slave. A dragon doesn't show mercy or appear weak. A dragon also doesn't share or play well with others. A dragon is meant to be the one who makes others submit, and expects to be on top, always.

The dragon also expects to be revered and be looked at with "wonder and awe" despite being "terrifying". And when they aren't...

I'll just go back to what Jorah said above about dragons not knowing what's theirs and what isn't. "Land, livestock, children. Letting them roam free in the city would have been a real problem." So I completely agree with you, Nonnie, that this was always going to be the full intention of her character, this is who she really was, and this was definitely on brand for her.

So, no, I don't think she was mad in the way that the GA thought the show had reduced her arc to. She was fully in control.

I hope I was able to answer your question, Nonnie. Thank you for this ask! I LOVE LOVE LOVE talking about GoT, but especially about Dany and her dark turn, so thank you!!!

I hope you have a very nice rest of your night!!! <3

[bestruction]

How it’d be to watch animes with them

A/N: While i’m working on my Mikasa x reader royal au, this little idea came to my mind. I tried to put the links when i mentioned a specific scene and speak a little about the anime in case you don’t know it.  So here it’s: 

Warnings: Me exposing my otaku self, mentions of 18+ animes (Not hentais) 

Eren -  Kaguya-sama wa Kokurasetai: Tensai-tachi no Renai Zunousen (13+)

A / N: The main characters like each other, but none wants to confess because being the person who takes the first step would also represent being the defeated person. The anime develops in a series of plans that both elaborate to make the other confess their love.

Warnings: None

It was his idea to watch an anime together since the two of you liked it a lot. You saw no harm and agreed to go to sleep with your boyfriend on Friday night. So, you would have the dawn and the weekend to see everything.

“We could watch One piece! Everybody likes"

“In three days ?! We will not finish even if we do not take breaks ”

"Naruto then?"

“Haven't you seen it all five times or more?

"But it is a classic!"

"It is also too long!"

He would sulk when he saw you reject each of his suggestions for being too big animes. The truth was, he was trying to convince you to stay longer. After much searching in the catalog, you choose to watch a short comedy of 12 episodes.

Biggest mistake ever

Eren is already annoying by nature, and after watching Kaguya-sama's two seasons he would spend the day and night trying to get you to confess to him EVEN IF YOU'VE BEEN IN LOVE FOR TWO YEARS AND HE HAS BEEN THE FIRST TO DECLARE. HIT HIM, PLEASE.

"Do you think that using such a low trick will make me give in?"

“Eren, I just got out of the shower. What trick? Wear an outfit? ”

“Showing off your skin won't make you win”

If you wanted to play with him, great. You are going to spend the day in this little game until he gets tired and just hugs you or something because he can't spend a lot of time without touching you. But if you didn't want to, just you could use that touchy side of him against him too.

"Maybe I shouldn't show you anything else then"

"Yes, of course, do- Wait what?"

"You heard"

“NO, BABE! YOU WON! I CONFESS! I LOVE YOU"

Watching anime with him would be quite an experience. For being very verbal, Eren would be the type of person who doesn't shut up watching anything. Especially, something that makes him laugh. You would see him laughing out loud and throwing himself back on the couch or on you, whether you were with him or not. You may even complain, but it would be fun to see him react to everything as immediately and naturally as an unfiltered child.

He will sing ALL the openings for the rest of the days around the house until you are humming some without realizing it.

For some reason, can I imagine him doing Chika dance ?? Yes, please film this big bear dancing like a little girl.

Levi - Death parade 

A / N: Do you want to cry and hurt yourself? This is the right place. Death Parade is a story about what happens after death. The characters are sent to mysterious bars where they will be judged to decide the fate of the souls themselves. (18+)

Warnings: Suicide, depressive themes, mentions of rape and domestic violence

I don't see Levi watching many animes. In fact, I don't see him watching much anything at all. He would be the type of person who can't spend a lot of time in front of the television without feeling like he's wasting time. Which would result in a very selective and demanding taste.

He would always read the reviews about the film, and after watching it, he would make his own. Ever. No exceptions. Unlike Impossible-to-be-quiet-Eren, Levi would be silent to be able to capture and understand all the details. This is interesting because getting his attention is a difficult task. But once it's done, he is 100% focused on the story and immersed in the characters.

So, after reading about it, he would agree to watch Death Parade with you.

He would have low expectations at first, and if the anime failed to hold his very difficult attention in three episodes, he wouldn't even try with the rest.

So when in the first episode, all suspense and doubts left to the viewer entered Ackerman's head, he would finish the other 11 without realizing it.

As a rational person, he would love things that make him think and reflect on the proposed theme. In the case: Life and death.

For some reason, I imagine him as someone who would like to study and read philosophy as a hobby and that he would love Nietzsche? So, you could expect deep conversations after each episode.

But without any arrogance, humanity's strongest soldier might not be the most talkative man in humanity, but surely when he opened his mouth to it, it wouldn’t be to show himself off with something that he knows and you don’t. On the contrary, he would be more than happy to explain if you asked and added your opinion.

He wouldn't cry, but he would be touched by the way the emotions were shown and created in the characters.

He would probably see the scene where Decim cries more than once for being impressed with how the pain of a character who is supposedly not flesh and blood is expressed so well.

And after the anime is over, you would always see him listening to the music of the ice skating scene around the house while doing something.

When you were finished watching everything, you would talk again about the anime. You lying on his chest and he touching his hair, smelling him.

"Do you believe in reincarnation, Levi?"

“If so, I wouldn't go back to this shit a second time. No matter what they offered me ”

"Levi!"

"Unless it was to have you again"

“What a cliché” He would roll his eyes after hearing your response “But I like clichés”

Again, he wouldn't cry, but he would be thinking about how ephemeral things can be, including being alive. Then you can expect a more touchy Levi for a few days.

Jean - Banana Fish 

N / A: Another one to cry and get hurt. Banana Fish is way more than just a story about one character just is hard to define. So in case, you didn’t watch it, here’s the trailer. (18+)

warnings: pedophilia, rape, violence, drugs, your heart being destroyed

You know that guy who says that no yaoi is good, it's just a way to feed a bunch of fujoshi and stuff like that? Jean. It's him. I just know it. So when you suggested Banana Fish and said it was a BL / yaoi, he would probably laugh and ignore the idea.

But after insisting a little and showing him the many compliments that both the anime and the manga received, he would accept.

At first, he wouldn't pay much attention. He really thought it would be just another bad anime. But by the end of the first episode, he would be too involved in the story to stop.

I think he would love crime novels for the same reason that Levi: To think. Try to find out how things are going to end and pick up any clues that the author has left about the ending. So the plot would hold him so much because he would make a ton of theories about the end.

He will ship Ash and Eiji with all his soul. I mean, how can he not ship? To see an anime in which the physical touch between the couple doesn't really happen and still builds a well-developed and healthy relationship would be a new experience for him.

Jean is somewhat similar to Eren in this respect. So you can expect to see him huffing in anger, cursing one of the characters, throwing a pillow away, or using it to hide a tear or two that he would let go of you. The kind of person who gets emotionally involved with the things he watches.

He would cry an entire river after watching the last episode and deny it later.

“I was not crying. The cushion fabric made my eyes itch a lot ”

Show him again and he will cry the same amount and intensity

Armin - Haikyuu

A / N: Considering all the texts on Tumblr for haikyuu characters, I’m pretty sure you know what anime it’s lol (10+)

Armin is an otaku with a license card and no one can change my mind. He would probably start watching it as a child. So, his first animes would be everyone's classics: Naruto, Dragon Ball Z, Bleach, etc.

So it would be normal that as the vast majority, he would continue to have a preference for shounen when he grew up. So it would be your idea to see Haikyuu.

He would have low expectations because he thought it would be just another anime with cute characters for everyone to be thirsty as an inverted harem. And also because the synopsis does not create a strong impression, especially for those who consume shounen daily.

"So we are just gonna see a little boy trying to catch a ball?"

“It's gonna be good! Everyone is talking about it now ”

"Does he have some superpower?"

"No"

"Something scary?"

"Armin, just give a chance!"

He would like it. Did I say he would like it? Because he would love it. The atmosphere created and well developed with such a simple plot would hold his attention well. (Is it possible to dislike Hinata in the first episode?)

It would be a great anime for him to watch because 1. It is different from what he usually sees. Unlike shounen, Haikyuu deals only with real and tangible scenarios. Of course, still with that touch of anime, but it is very easy to recognize yourself in the characters and learn from them and therefore reflect on yourself as well.

It would be great to make him think about his own insecurities and how most of them were inside his head.

He would be so immersed in the anime universe that he would have to pause the game scenes because he would be too nervous waiting for the ball to fall.

You will probably see him taking a deep breath in each drawing scene of the characters and see him truly cheering for the team as if it were a real national game.

More than that, you will see his eyes full of tears when Yamaguchi hit the serve in the match against Aoba johsai.

In fact, Yamaguchi would be his favorite character. No discussions.

"I said it would be good"

"Shut up"

"Make me"

Mikasa - Heaven’s official blessing 

A / N: I'm going to leave the trailer here because I don't know how to define it very well. It's a novel, but the story doesn't focus ONLY on that. (14+)

Okay, you didn't suggest. She did not suggest. So how do you end up watching together? You catch her watching when you come home by surprise lol

Until then, you would know that she watched some anime, but nothing romantic. Never. In fact, that was her little secret.

Although common sense is that Mikasa would be cold even in a modern au (and I agree in parts). I think she would be the type of person who loves to see the sweetest and softest things to melt alone on the couch without anyone seeing. A moment for herself and a part of her that she would not show to anyone.

You would already know about her romantic side, but seeing her under the covers sighing while watching the Netflix special episode is a totally different story.

Please don’t mock her!!. She would be red enough by the time she was discovered.

When she was less shy, she would ask if you want to watch with her. She would say she saw no problem watching it with you again since doing it with you would be a different experience.

If you accept, you would spend the rest of the night in the room sharing a blanket and absorbing the soft atmosphere, the soundtrack, and the Chinese culture so present in history.

She would not speak a lot because she was paying attention, but she would hug you all the time. In the romantic scenes, she would tighten her arms around you a little and sometimes left a kiss on your shoulder.

I think she could relate to Hua Cheng's way of loving. He is always there to protect, care for and see his lover even if sometimes Xie Lian doesn't even know.

And that is what she wants to show you, that more than a girlfriend, she is also someone you can count on.

Days later, you will see her reading the rest of the work around the house because she couldn't stand to wait for a second season.

And later, SURELY melting and vibrating while watching Mo Dao Zu Shi.

[yourvirtualhusband]

I will not accept anything else.

Absolutely no disagreements.

Aslan is alive and well, and living happily in Japan with his wonderful husband Eiji, and he became a doctor and worked on saving lives. They've adopted a child or two, and they're a very happy family. He is also the owner of multiple orphanages and created multiple branches of places run by the Ash Foundation, for runaway children.

Eiji went back to pole vaulting with the encouragement and assistance of his wonderful husband, and even won an Olympic Gold Metal for Japan.

Shorter is alive. Don't fight me on this. Shorter is alive and well, and is owner and head cook at his amazing restaurant Chang Dai, which is now a 5 star restaurant with amazing reviews by the top food critics, including Gordon Ramsey.

Oh and Sing is his successor and apprentice, and they have a brotherly relationship. Again, I'm taking no disagreements.

Yut-Lung became one of the richest businessmen that runs one of the top best companies in the country. He's also a sponsor to the Ash Foundation and runs one of it's branches. He and Ash became friendly rivals after coming to better understanding of each other.

Dino is dead. End of story.

Blanca went back to vibing in the Caribbean.

Ibe became a famous photographer and he and Max work together.

Max continued his job as a journalist, and also became a writer. He also returned home to his wife and his son.

Ash's gang now helps him run and manage the Ash Foundation. They're all very happy to help their boss do better.

Again, I take no disagreements on this.

Let me have at least this to hold onto.

(I rewatched Banana Fish, and I'm spiraling out of control because I can't get over the ending, I'm sorry)

[i-mybrunettelady]

15 from hurt/comfort prompts for Arson Man my beloved

One Arson man coming right up with a very Achilles like moment also why do these prompts make me wanna write the scenes i've had in my head for a while now yes prompts yes

This may be as good place as any to say that this isn't a fluff fic. It's... a fucked up fic, in a way. So beware of that.

Cw: some gore (very light but still) and injury description

nothing to see here + elandrin

The vines of Cadeyrn's throat are wet and torn. Precision of the cut is unmatched; it's his; he feels it under his fingers just as he feels the sap running against his nails. There are stab wounds, but El couldn't help himself. Green leaves are losing light with progressive speed and he almost wants to close his brother's eyes but he'd be loathe to part from the look of abject surprise at the final loss.

Brother. What a strange word. He doesn't know why he reached for it. Cadeyrn hasn't been his brother since that fateful night in his cabin, but there's something weird coming from it. It's probably the realisation has yet to hit his brain.

His lips curl in a smile. Sticky fingers press against the hilt of his daggers. Pain flashes against his side but there are Morrigu, Caithe and this Vigil crusader Caithe dug out of the ground.

The crusader moves to the corpse. Her breath is heavy and her step light, as light as a chain-mail can allow.

"Let him be," he warns. His voice is filled with unbridled joy. "Let him be, Crusader."

"Last rites, maybe? If sylvari have any?"

"As if a human would be the one distributing them," he says. She frowns and stops just shy of it.

"El," Caithe says. "Alysannyra, we don't have a specific set of rituals like you do. It's more of a what feels right at the moment sentiment."

"What feels right at the moment," El repeats. He feels air gather in his throat, ready to burst. Ashes reach his nostrils from a burnt tree nearby, though the flames have gone out.

And it bursts, in a laughter that is thunder and a forest fire and wind and the angry sea. It's happy, joyful, as if he's shaken off some terrible burden; if Cadeyrn had thought he could simply take El's surrender and just leave him afterwards to deal with the rawness himself, then El can extend the same courtesy and let him look at the prison of his own making in death.

Pain spreads against the cut bark as he kicks the body hardest he can. Then again. Then again. Alysannyra has moved, watching wordlessly.

"Morrigu," she calls out to the Warden. "Shall we get the other Wardens to mop this up?"

"Yes," Morrigu intones and he can't hear them walk away over his own ragged breath but when he and Caithe are alone, his knees give out and he bends over and he's shaking with laughter and pain.

"I won, you fucker," he rasps out, "I won. I killed you. Yeah, wipe that smug grin off your face because I'm alive and you're not, you stupid sack of spice. I wo-"

"I knew this was going to happen," Caithe wraps an arm around him, "as soon as you showed up at Twilight Arbor." She sounds sad and El can't really understand why. "Poor Siona."

"Fuck Siona," he says, "if she cared for her brother she would've returned him to the correct sylvari, but now he's fodder for the plants. She had a chance and she didn't take it. That means I get to kill him."

"At least let me close his eyes," she adds. Her hand is firm and he's distantly aware he'd be floating away somewhere if it wasn't for that.

"I forgot what a mean punch he can land," El whispers, unable to hide his joy still.

"Does it hurt?"

A nod. He wants to curl on the ground. And even as she checks his wounds while the Wardens arrive, he's smiling brightly. Fuck Siona. He'll deal with her later. He now gets to bask in being the one left standing.