#+ they both feel like 16yos not 20-somethings.

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Sea Of Broken Glass

fantasy

two sisters who live on a floating village in a shallow ocean are exiled when one develops magic and can’t hide it like her sister does

they travel to the land, trying to survive searching for their mother who was exiled 20 years ago, through the wilderness and magical caves

crystal/mineral magic, magical creatures, sister relationships

[constelationprize]

ROBIN/ELODIE ??????

if this about to be like my eva josten/adèle moreau scenario i will cry then ask u to please marry me.

i need this more than i need air. u don’t understand. i love u. ur the freaking best. tell me more.

Yeah that one came to me in a vision.

The thing is that like most of my other niche rarepairings I just cannot resist the allure of Narrative Parallels™. Mostly I just realized how similar Elodie and Robin's stories are (in concept) and that they could actually be around the same age (considering Elodie would be around 15-16yo in 2007 and Robin joins the Foxes in 2009 after Kevin graduates, and assuming Robin didn't get held back due to the Horrors, that would put them at around a 1-2 year age difference).

So the basic concept for the AU is that Elodie survives and is rescued by Stuart during TSC and then brought over to the USA to live with Jean and the Trojans. This goes about as well as you would expect, which is to say not at all – she's heavily traumatized, barely speaks English for the first couple years, and is resistant to any kind of help that would result in her having to leave Jean's side. She also at first does not want anything to do with the other Trojans at all because she sees most of them as adults she can't trust and also resents them for monopolizing Jean's time, and none of these college sports players is anywhere near qualified for unpacking All of That.

Elodie and Jean effectively make each other's recovery worse for a long while because they immediately try and fall back to their childhood dynamic, which can no longer work for multiple reasons. But through Betsy Dobson all things are possible and eventually they get to a point where they aren't actively standing in each other's way anymore, though things are still Not Good.

It gets tough again when Jean graduates and they move out of LA, which just uproots what little stability Elodie had again, and he has developed a need to constantly check on her that cannot be good for his now even busier pro player schedule. Also, Elodie is almost 18, and at a point where she should be graduating high school and thinking about her future, which she very much is not doing because until a couple years ago she didn't even HAVE a future so she doesn't really know what to do with it.

They start floating the possibility of getting her into a community college or something in the state Jean's in, but eventually the possibility of having some strings pulled to get her into PSU is brought up, and Elodie latches onto it immediately, mostly because she both feels stifled by Jean's helicopter parenting AND kind of wants to punish him for not actually spending time with her by moving away. Jean doesn't want to let her, but he also doesn't really have a choice, and PSU might be far but at least he knows Elodie will have people there to reach out to if she needs it.

Joke's on Elodie though because going to college to annoy your brother does mean she just conned herself into taking classes and figuring out what to do with her life now and she has to do it while dodging 20 phone calls per hour. Anyway now that she's on PSU she has to learn how to do human person things like making friends. She ends up joining a roller derby team as a combo meeting people-getting exercise-venting anger deal.

Robin, on the other hand, is going through a similar situation where Andrew just graduated, and Neil is in his last year, so she's about to lose her anchors at PSU. Once Neil graduates, she won't have anyone to night practice with anymore, so she also joins the roller derby team to fill in her nights, in a way of trial-running how to maintain some sense of routine and normalcy and maybe make some friends as well.

And that is how the world's saddest most traumatized girls meet. They have no idea who the other really is at first because Elodie doesn't follow exy out of spite and they also don't tell each other their full names because they are very googlable and the team is for both of them a way to finding who they are outside of what happened to them, so they don't want to invite the past in there.

Neil figures it out pretty fast though, since he's been keeping an eye on Elodie, but he tells no one because he thinks it's going to be funny when Andrew and Jean (who absolutely hate each other) discover they're dating (He's right). The basic idea I have is that everyone kind of finds out at the same time when Andrew and Jean play against each other in a nearby city and both Elodie and Robin come to watch and it's a very spiderman pointing meme moment all around.

Getting to truly know each other then is a blessing and a curse because the similarities between their stories are as important as the differences. Elodie would have given everything to have parents that would want her back home and want to protect her and Robin would kill to have her family understand and relate to her trauma the way Jean does. Elodie genuinely cannot understand Robin's guilt over escaping by dooming another girl because she would have actively killed without remorse to break out. Robin doesn't get why Elodie is bitter over having to be rescued when she used to dream about someone finding and saving her. It's a very "grass is always greener on the other side" situation, and they clash a lot, but eventually they work it out.

I'm also thinking of having Robin being conflicted over whether she wants or even is capable of going pro (since as per the EC she technically wasn't good enough to be recruited if not for Andrew's constant endorsement). I'm not sure what Elodie would be majoring in, but that's fine because neither is Elodie. So that's something else they're both dealing with.

That's mostly what I have so far, I'm hoping some day this fic will grow a plot that can hold my attention so I can actually write it.

[juuggg]

Been playing a lot of indie games the last few months and I want to keep a little tally of them so i don’t forget

ASTROMAN : Cute little 32bit platformer made for a gamejam, it gave me the same feeling as a mobile game called green the planet and I mean it in a good way. The gameplay isn’t groundbreaking, but it’s relaxing to jump around collecting crystals. If they made this longer it would pop hard.

Carbon Steel : from Mike Klubnika. You join an experiment that pays a lot for weird and probably unethical research. Does a great job at building tension and making you 2nd doubt whether you’re “really” aware of reality. The endings were both a bit weak but still a very fun game worth playing, around 30min.

Cold Fr*nt : I'm censoring the name so it doesn’t appear in search man this was ASS. Good premise for 3 whole minutes before this shit turns uwu cringe ass moe moe stebaniel universal on everyone as they recite a “your feelings matter” message stolen straight from a twitter poisonned 16yo’s notes app. Was the dev afraid of being called out on tiktok for portraying unhealthy relationships or something? Anyway, if MY childhood friend pushed me down stairs, breaking my leg, I would tell them to kill themselves.

Coward Town : weird one, cool graphics but the audio hurted. Fun to wiggle around with a vague story in the background. tonic!

Driftwood : Loved this one, short visual with shrooms involved. Touches on classical themes of existentialism and coming of age. Don’t wanna spoil it too much, it definitely can get cheesy but it’s worth a play through (20 to 30mins). Made me smile from how honest it was at times, like the dev was just writing down a conversation they had in the past.

Evaluation : I didn’t remember downloading this one and looking at the steam page I'm surprised I even did. But it was a nice surprise, it's got a lot of charm especially knowing it’s the dev’s first game. It’s absolutely worth doing that 2nd play through otherwise it feels empty, but even with the tonal shift between the two routes it felt like a complete experience. Would love to see a remake of this in the future.

Infineural : Also from Mike Klubnika, the fridge horror didn’t really get to me but for 5mins it’s worth a download. Carbon steel was better.

Rental : Very nice, the 2nd and 1st areas could have been linked better. They managed to create an otherworldly but whimsical atmosphere very quickly. Cool audio and visual tricks.

WaterWombWorld : From Yames, I had it in my folders for a long time but didn’t remember playing it, so I did now. It’s thickly coated in religious significance from start to finish. If the dev came out and said he was working through his faith at the time of development I wouldn’t be surprised. It’s made me want to go back and replay Yames’ other titles.

Still fishing : feesh bloop bloop 🐟

Critters For Sale : Bought it for the graphics mostly lol. I had no clue what to expect going into it but it definitely took me by surprise on more than one occasion. It’s like a point and click visual novel adaptation of finding a conspiracy theorist’s website, going through every tab in awe, and barely being able to explain anything after. Worth a play.

I Live Under Your House + It Lives Under The House DLC : Feels like this one exploded a bit in popularity for good reason. Unique take on a spooky monster story where YOU, the player, get to be the weird guy. Loved the visuals. Absolutely do not want to spoil it but I’ll say the DLC is just as good as the main game and even better at points.

Megs’ monsters (Demo) : When it gets released in 5years and explodes it’s going to be compared to every single massively popular RPG à-la deltarune and earthbound and there’s going to be so much porn of the big monsters.

Magnus Positive Phototaxis : A short 1hr point and click puzzle game. Wish i could say it was nice but nothing really stood out other than the 3d object cutscenes that were never mentioned again. Did not expect it to take a religious U-turn but it seems to be part of a larger series of games so maybe I'm missing something. Disjointed. Mid at best.

Out Of Hands (Demo) : Didn’t care for the story when it turned out to be about a lost high-school love etc. You can Obliterate the balancing by using the double dmg at low hp perk. It feels like it’s missing a something and got repetitive near the end, but this is a demo so whatever! Using hands and clay for graphics is super cute, kept me playing just to see what random things they used next.

rats in a cage (Demo) : Loved this one. You’re trying to become a jobcell and one of the only companies that responded wants you to do a survey on a funny program because they really don’t have time to interview everyone. Said program is a rat kin puzzle game with an AI that fucking hates you. It’s absolutely going to be compared to baba is you and portal that’s not even a question, I will say the humour felt more stanley-parable-esque than portal to me. Puzzles were very easy but it might just be baba PTSD making me think every level is going to take 3hrs.

Return. : Short platforming game with cute graphics. This was odd, everything about it feels like it’s part of an ARG or would have a hidden secret fucked up horror ending but there doesn’t seen to be anything like that. The controls feel crisp and the way they did jumps was pretty unique, definitely would like to see more.

Rusty Blade : it’s alright, enjoyed the graphics but navigation itself gave me a headache.

Who’s Lila? : PLAY IT!!!!!! PLAY IT RIGHT NOW PLAY IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAVEN’T FINISHED YET

skolios : playing right now, good atmosphere and nostalgic of older rpghorro games but I would be lying if i said i didn’t check the walkthrough.

Northern Journey : BUG SWATTING SIMULATOR 3000 I’d recommend this to everyone if the difficulty balancing wasn’t so messy. After spending 2hrs on the bandit fight i kinda gave up. Fun movement, fun aesthetic, fun characters, kinda mean as fuck at times but it’s funny. I’ll get drunk and spend 20hrs on beating it at some point i swear.

Mundaun : Another one with difficulty balancing problems, skill issue i know i know. Graphics are A+, setting is A+, story is intriguing, But the sniping haystacks made me mald. I WANT to love it just give me 1month i’ll git gud and then can get a solid opinion on it.

Mirage of Dragon : thought I’d hate it but it’s really just a puzzle exploration game, killed 4 dragoos so far but being reset to the beginning and needing to watch the unskippable cutscene everytime is annoying. Great aesthetic and visuals, the dev put a lot of heart into the side material, mostly the guide, cute to see ♥

ANATOMY : hurts my eyes so bad

[ruffboijuliaburnsides]

*chinhands* spiritual for steffa

ALL OF THEM? Aight then, let's do this. *cracks knuckles*

~Spiritual~

16. Do they have any regrets in their life?

HAHAAAAAAHAHAHAH yes. Yes, she... fuck, she regrets helping Jowan, even if it ultimately probably saved her life, ironically. She regrets leaving with Morrigan (even though there was no way she wasn't going to) because of what happened to Anders after she left. She regrets every person she couldn't save, even when it was just so absolutely not her fault that she couldn't.

17. What is something they dislike about either themselves or the world?

She dislikes that the world is so unfair. She dislikes that there is evil and cruelty and pettiness.

And she dislikes that she is still bitter about everything related to Alistair, even though it's been more than a decade since she last saw him. She doesn't think she was wrong to react to him the way she did, but she really doesn't like how much it still pisses her off that he just fucked off the way he did, after shoving responsibility on her (a 16yo) and Nat (a 19yo) when he was both older and more experienced at being a warden even though technically speaking they definitely did a better job than he could've.

18. Is there a situation that might make it impossible for them to relax?

hahahaaaa so many. So many. If she has responsibilities she's not confident in her ability to do, or if she feels like she'd be doing them a disservice by relaxing. If someone she loves is in danger. basically the entire first 3 years of her son's life because she was constantly terrified of something happening.

(she gets better with age, tho)

19. Are they honest to themselves, or do they ignore feeling hurt or sad?

It depends. She'll absolutely acknowledge her hurt and sadness and anger, and feel them, unless she needs to be doing something (in her opinion), or if someone else needs her to have her shit together (in her opinion).

(this is another thing that she gets better at with age)

20. Do they like to be alone with themselves often or surrounded by friends?

She 100% prefers to have a lot of people around her, even if she wants to be left alone. Mostly because she spent her formative years living in a dormitory in a relatively small tower full of mages and almost never truly having a moment alone. It was annoying growing up, but also... being alone for too long, or being truly alone (ie she can't hear anyone shuffling around or talking the next room over) is... unsettling and makes her feel cold and sad and miserable.

It reminds her of Kinloch Hold being cold and still and full of the bodies of the people she grew up with. :/

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

sometime in this last week, or this week coming, my blog has turned/turns 10. god. a decade old. a whole ass chunk of my life i’ve spent on this hellsite. when i began on here, i was a kid. a lost, lonely, depressed and anxious 15/16 year old kid. a kid scared of her future. a kid confused about her future. what to do for uni. to change schools or not??? to do drama/acting at uni or english/philosophy or to move 8hrs away to another regional uni to “escape” her “washed up, dead end hometown” that was so typical of all the pop-punk music that she was listening to at the time.

she was a tad overdramatic, loud, “funny” (as described by her school friends) and terribly forgetful in regards to homework and school assignments. she was angry at the world, most especially the catholic school she was fucking sick and tired of attending. but she was convinced that since she was the so-called “funny girl”, that she simply couldn’t be depressed or anxious. she believed herself unloveable because she didn’t look like a weird mixture of hayley williams and emo-pop queen lights. but now, i no longer believe that i have to look like the women that i looked up to in the ~emo scene~. fuck beauty standards. i am loveable.

in the years since joining tumblr, i’ve managed to get through business college, my undergrad degree and, well, failed out of postgrad due to obvious burnout and health issues amongst other things. although i’ve lost many friends irl and many followers/mutuals online on here. for those who’ve stuck around to see me get through all of this, thank you. to all the friends/casual mutuals that have since deactivated or only followed me for a short time then unfollowed; thank you.

like obviously i was never/have never been a massive popular blog on here, like thebootydiaries or vampireapologist (who has since deactivated a couple of months ago) with tens of thousands of followers. my follower count is still close to the 8,000 range at 7,892. obviously that’s still a lot of people (and of course, porn bots lmao and many, many non-active blogs), enough like one super old post from like 2012 tumblr pointed out, enough for a small to medium sized city or town, or something like that. i don’t know how many people i’ve really reached. i really don’t know how i actually amassed this small army of people.

i am aware though, that on other platforms like snapchat (lmao does anyone even use it anymore in 2021???)/instagram/youtube/tiktok etc, i’d PROBABLY be considered as some type of ~micro influencer (🤮🤮)~. hell, i actually had a bot slide into my notes about being one on here on this hellsite back in 2019. i don’t know if i’ve ever actually ~influenced~ anyone on here with my shitposts (when i started making some) or my personal posts. i don’t know my reach. even though, now, i do occasionally get featured on buzzfeed listicles (although pay me buzzfeed along with the OPs of those original embedded posts), i still don’t know how many people i’ve reached… and even with my very occasional checks of google analytics lmao. on top of this, grappling with the loss of followers at times is much, much easier than it was when i began on here and the first few years following that. i know that my follower count doesn’t determine my worth and stuff.

but over these 10 years, i have grown. i turn 26 this year. back in 2011, 15/16yo me never thought she’d be here. she was partially down the suicidal thoughts hole, with things about ~picturing her funeral and wondering who’d bother to turn up. if only she could pretend to be dead for a day to see who’d give a fuck~ and 16-18yo me was defs down it with her HSC hellscape thoughts in 2012/2013. that 3rd floor tafe/tech women’s bathroom window drop and the thought of scarring her class for life (and that cool dude from catholic school that she crushed on who ended up at tafe with her) with jumping out of it onto the concrete below. instead, she just posted on fb about ~being a failure~ etc which ultimately did lose her a bunch of facebook friends lmao. it was practically the same thing. her mental breakdown after the end of her hsc, where she let her earrings go green and get infected in her ears because “fuck self care, bc what the fuck is it??? i’ll never get better! let me fucking wallow in my self loathing bc it’s the only thing that i’m fucking good at!!!” so i no longer have my ears pierced. oh! it was just all too fucking much!!

i am happier today. i no longer have those semi-suicidal thoughts. hell, i almost died in 2020 from a fucking bowel aneurysm, after my stomach tumour excision surgery. that forced me to put things into perspective. i appreciate the little things . i appreciate the very few friends that i actually have. yes. i’m still depressed and anxious. some days are still shitty and hard. but nowhere as hard and shitty as they were back when i began on here 10 years ago.

how the fuck last 10 years have gone past, with my ass on here; clearing out my blog and caring more about doing that than my uni work (lmao whoops); having made some lifelong friends both internationally (from the US) and long distance domestically in australia, it’s been a long ride; i honestly have no fucking idea. obviously over these past 10 years, i’ve debated with myself over and over and over again whether i should delete/deactivate this account or not. would it make me healthier??? more than likely. but then when i have meltdowns or just inner ramblings i have to get out somewhere, where else to post??? on fb?? obvs not. it’s “attention seeking” or the like on there. no one will read them. no one will resonate. but on here??? even if i got/get one “like” in the notes or one “yo i feel this” response in the tags or replies, it feels like i’ve reached someone??? okay yeah. i know this place IS NOT therapy and i’m not using my followers as amateur (or probs even actual professional) armchair psychologists…. which is a thing i think people need to stop doing internet-wide: but that’s a whole other post that i reblogged a few days ago lmao. i really need to get another therapist, actually lmao.

but it’s the community i’ve found hard to leave. i have what feel like friends, when i’ve never been employed (still as of yet); and when all of my irl friends/acquaintances are working and doing the whole ~adulting~ and ~grown up life~ thing right. it’s also the frenzied rabidness of spite with hating staff’s godawful ideas. the memes. oh the memes. and also the RaWrInG 20s XD emo scene reemergence on here that’s kept me here. the messy petty drama from time to time of big blogs fighting it out.

this place really is bizarre and fun sometimes. and also the fact that i can still hide behind the ridiculous “roaring pikachu” URL that i made all those years ago. i am anonymous. it’s freeing. but on fb it’s all like “WHY WONT YOU ADD A BANNER IMAGE AND TELL US 20 FUN FACTS ABOUT YOU!!!!!???? LET PEOPLE WHO HAVENT SPOKEN TO YOU IN 10 YEARS KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU BECAUSE WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE!!!” and the same goes for Corporate Hellscape Facebook™️ (linkedin) but in the professional sense instead. y’all know fuck all about me really. besides my posts. and i love that and live for that. okay yeah. y’all know more about my mental health than my fb feed obvs… which is probably a terribly unfortunate thing. but still.

over the last 10 years then, my superiority complex for being ~so original and intelligent~ or whatever the fuck i had in high school, has all but ebbed away. i’m not that smart just because i went to uni. hell, i literally did NONE of my in-class work and none of my philosophy readings in uni….. so i have fuck all idea of how i got through undergrad like that lmao. i’m not original when so many people can articulate the same thoughts that i have, but like, sometimes better, on a post (even though sometimes/most of the time the Tumblr User Hot Takes Tuesday™️ takes on here are fucking awful lmao). but still. originality is not something i really have anymore. or really had in the first place lmao.

so will i deactivate after these 10 years, like i’ve been saying for so, so long??? i honestly have no idea. but just know. thanks guise. have a nice gpoy selfie day XD. grab your wands. your tardises. grab your war paint. grab your whatever the fuck other fandom specific stuff that was one that hella cringe post from 2011 til 2015 random tumblr. that relic is as old as time itself. just as this mysterious roaring pikachu is for someone whose too loyal to leave this W E B B E D H E L L S I T E that’s just as much of a train wreck as she is. lmao.

[inthewaytoamultilinguallife]

Writing project

Lately, I've been feeling pretty down about not having written in French or Portuguese in forever. Maintaining a house pretty much on my own and juggling 6 university courses at the same time doesn't allow for too much formal language learning, as it is. So, this past few weeks I've been scrambling my brain for something to remedy that -something that wasn't writing notes or getting a pen pal or writing about my day. You know, something that a) I didn't do already, b) didn't require money or c) otherwise useless.

I have this problem, you see: once I've mastered the basics (a little past A2, for those who grew up taking exams and have the scale burnt in their mind, like me) most of my language learning must consist of immersion and something fundamentally useful/ productive (to me, this things works differently for everyone). I do know that, technically, just by being part of studying a language, is productive, but I need more. Whether is studying + taking time off (like watching a serie in a target language) or studying + doing homework (like looking for information for a paper in a TL), it has to have a "plus" usefulness that writing a diary or alike doesn't have for me.

I couldn't find anything on the internet, having basically already done all of the ideas listed (that's what over a decade of studying languages does to you), so after weeks of thinking, I settled for something I wanted to try when I was a young teen: writing letters to myself.

Is not exactly a new thing, but I like it. I put myself to work immediately and made myself a nice big journal with old school photocopies were to write (I promised myself long ago to never buy another notebook again for anything but school, and now make them all myself) and started writing right away. They come to me pretty quickly, although I've to admit I struggled a little with the topic of the third. But once I sat down to write, I was done in minutes.

I didn't want to choose between writing in French or Portuguese, so I decided all letters addressed to "past me" would be in French, and all letters addressed to "future me" would be in Portuguese. I'm writing one letter per age (one for just-born me, one for 1 year old me, etc), and the idea is to write all the way until 19yo me before I turn 20 next year. I will write letters for "future me" in the between of course, but I would like to concentrate on those first 19 letters first.

It doesn't seem like a big challenge now, but that is more up to college, and its time-consuming nature, more than anything. I'm not rushing the letters, I just let the topic come to me as I live my day-to-day life. If any inspiration comes for an age that is too far yet, I write it down and wait until the age comes. I've, for example, written down to thanks my 16yo for finally having the courage to address her attraction to girls, and to write a letter for 7yo me telling her that having gender feelings was completely ok.

As you see, I mostly write about things that I would have liked to have been told, or that I would actually tell past me if I could. Any letter for future self would be as a way to ask for advice or relieve my anxiety. Is a nice way to evaluate my life, see both the good and the bad with other lights, as well as confront my tendency to hide myself and my feelings from others, even if they are the most simple thing (ok, I'm writing in languages my family doesn't speak, but they are both mutually understandable with Spanish and the journal is just right there, not hidden at all so...).

The process for each letter is pretty simple and consistent, so is something that will quickly become a habit -a must, for studying a language- and to do when you don't have that much time: I let the topic or general idea of the letter come to me and I write it down on my cellphone's notes. Then, I write them on a document google, with the autocorrect off so I can write freely, without worrying about mistakes yet. Once done, I read it and try to spot the mistake myself, and then I turn the autocorrect on to correct it again. I try to not rely on any translator or dictionary unless I truly can not rewrite or formulate my sentence in any other way. Once pleased with my letter, I wait until the night to write it in my journal. I turn the music on, and use one of my old -but favorite- purple pens to write, making of the process a whole me-time night. The next morning, I would go either to the field across my house or to our backyard and try to remember what flower or what kind of leaf was I obsessed with at that time, and add it next to the letter.

Truth be told, I couldn't be happier with this project. Is easy to maintain and fit into a tight routine, it doesn't require money or too much time. I can write whatever I want, I don't have to worry about mistakes or presentations like with online pen pals, and it works just fine for a nice quiet me time.

[icharchivist]

hey icha whats hypmic??

Heyaaa and ooooh dear where do i even begin…..

Erg so in very short it’s a musical mixed media story that have kind of a corny set up that is mostly an excuse to have fictional male characters of different background involve themselves into rap battles? Most of its content comes from songs and drama CD, even if there are a few manga adaptation covering a couple of the drama tracks (albeit all those covered are how the teams got together and all).

In a little more depth: Basically a group of 12 Seiyuu decided to band together into a principe of rap battle, that would also give a spotlight to multiple rap artists in Japan, as they do collaboration by writting/composing the songs. All of the Seiyuu play different characters divided in 4 divisions: Buster Bros!! for Ikebukuro, Mad Trigger Crew for Yokohama, Fling Posse for Shibuya, and Matenrou for Shinjuku. Each divisions/characters have distinct styles of music or text to differenciate them.

The idea is that, after World War 3 and a lot of the population dying, weapons causing harms had been outlawed, instead remplaced by what we call Hypnosis Microphone (or Hypmic), weapons that attack the brain via its sonic vibes, thus are more powerful depending on how savy you are with words and sounds and all of that. (like i said, it’s corny, it’s really just a pretext for the battles ahah)

The Government, that is kinda shady, took hold into Chuuouku, the center of the city, and the rest of the towns are left to fend for their own, indulging in territories battles. By the time the story start, 4 teams have taken a hand into 4 divisions where they try their best to low the crime rate and make life better, this sort of stuff. Recently however, the Government decided to keep a closer eye on the Rap Battle themselves, organizing huge Event in Chuuouku for the Divisions to fight each other, and the winner can therefore have major impact on what gets developped in the city and all.

It’s also important to know that the 4 leaders of the divisions, Ichiro, Samatoki, Ramuda and Jakurai, used to be in a band together, The Dirty Dawg, and they were very close - Something ended up breaking up the band (it is unsure what it is exactly) and left them with sort of bittersweet relationship with each other as they’re now in a position where they have to fight each other.

Again though most of it is mostly a pretext for songs and character driven plotlines for those 12 to fuck shit up: 

(here a link to the translation, and here’s a link for the playlist of the songs they put on youtube - mostly previews except for the Ensemble songs - i can send the full songs/drama CDs but in private since it’s… illegal and all.You’ll find all the translations out on this website, and here you’ll find the drama tracks. And there for the solo songs only but idk how long this website will keep them up.)

(btw here’s the second ensemble song and here’s the third one - i tend to prefer them to the first one so here they are)

So like i said, corny, but character driven and i love those morons, and the songs are bangers, and i ended up loving it ways too much.

I’ll enter more in depth on the Divisions under the cut bc i do think knowing a bit the characters give a better idea but yeah kdjfhd my latest obsession rip.

If you’re reading this i’m so sorry i’m going to geek out over my 12 stupid sons.

btw (MC: ___) is their scene names, basically.

And erg while i try to avoid spoilers from the latest season, there’s a lot of “spoilers” from backstory exposition or information spreads through the drama tracks and the songs, so either just scroll to see the name and all or read at your own risks? 

Buster Bros!!! representing Ikebukuro Division - in red, Ichiro Yamada (19yo) the leader,in blue, Jiro Yamada (16yo), in yellow Saburo Yamada (14). (Previews of their solo songs, preview of their first group song Ikebukuro West Game Park, their second group song: Ohayo Ikebukuro!)

Ichiro, Jiro and Saburo are brothers - they are orphans (unknown why but since Ichiro rejects any fathr figure p strongly i think it’s linked to their father) and Ichiro, the eldest brother, had taken care of his two little brothers most of his life to the point of being a delicant before being recruited by the Dirty Dawg. Before the story started the boys weren’t all that close, but by now, both little brothers want to prove their worth to their eldest brothers and when the Dirty Dawg broke up and Ichiro had to figure out which team to make for the Rap Battles, both brothers offered to help. Despite both being ways too young for this they still both ended up proving themselves. They also tend to fight for their big brother’s attention a lot.

Ichiro (MC Big Brother) himself seems to be a rather warm and friendly person - he works odd jobs all around town, kind of like a mercenary but doing just… any sort of work being asked of him, just not in the illegal stuff when he can avoid it. He’s rather hot headed. He used to be very close from the Dirty Dawg who took care of him when they met, especially Samatoki, but since the band’s break up, it seems there is a particularly sour relationship with Samatoki neither of them are over with. Ichiro often disses Samatoki out of nowhere in his raps lmao. Aside from that he’s a complete geek and loves manga and anime and video game - all the stuff you’d expect.

Jiro, (MC Middle Brother) the second, tends to follow Ichiro’s path a lot, being a bit in delincance and stuff, creating himself a web of contacts. He tends to copy Ichiro in his passions in order to impress him. He’s also very social and get friends very easily. He’s constantly bickering with Saburo who seems to see their “brotherhood” as a competition. They used to be very close when they were younger but now they’re always at each other’s throat.

Saburo (MC Little Brother), the third, doesn’t really want to follow the path of his brothers but he wants to be useful in his own way. Incredibly clever, he is a very good hacker and can find information very quickly. He also has some of the sickest burn of the lot but i’m biased. Unlike Jiro, Saburo is really not social at all and has very few friends. His whole world is about being the best he can be for Ichiro.He likes things that can stimulate his brian, especially board games and the likes. 

Mad Trigger Crew, representing Yokohama Divison- Center in white, Samatoki Aohitsugi(25) the Leader - with glasses, Juuto Iruma (29), in military uniform, Riou Busujima Manson (28).(Previews of their solo songs, preview of their first group song: Yokohama Walker, their second group song: Dead Pools)

If The BB are linked by the fact they’re brothers, MTC is linked by being….. Involved in armed illegal activities? Samatoki is the second in command of a Yakuza family, Juuto is a corrupted cop who is close to Samatoki because of… work…. and Riou kinda ended up tagging along. Anyway they’re in charge of Yokohama which seems to be a part of the city that suffered pretty badly from the war and have high crime rates.

In more details, Samatoki (MC Mr Hardcore) is involved in the mafia. He explains in his personal song that his mother killed his abusive father before killing herself, leaving him to take care of his little sister, Nemu, which is what led him to a life of crime. His Yakuza clan seems to have a honor code though so they’re not involved in too much dirty stuff. Every sacrifice Samatoki did was for his sister. So obviously he saw a bit of himself in Ichiro when they originally met, and was one of the influencial force to keep Ichiro out of the crime life knowing pretty well where it’s headed. The Band breakup left a particularly sour taste in Samatoki’s mouth regarding Ichiro, feeling betrayed by whatever happened back then, and since then he tends to be. touchy. when it’s question of Ichiro. As in, almost caused a car crash while he wasn’t driving just thinking about Ichiro. He’s a mess. He’s also very short tempered. 

Juuto (MC 45 Rabbit) is a corrupted cop: while he works with the police and all the stuff, he has ties with Samatoki’s yakuza clan and will do shady stuff in order to maintain this alliance. Mostly blackmail, bailing Samatoki out of jail, all this sort of things. He seems to have a specific reason to accept it, a necessary evil to get rid of wickedness in the city. Juuto’s backstory was only developped in the latest drama tracks so it would count as spoilers but let’s say he has reasons to do so.He’s generally more down to earth and more tongue in cheek. He knows how to pick up people’s weaknesses let’s say.

Riou (MC Crazy M) is an army man who isn’t aware the war is over. He has been living in survival mode in the forest of Yokohama for the past few years, having also one of the prototype Hypnosis Mic, with more raw power. His hobbies is to cook from… unusual sources. Samatoki and Juuto are terrified by his cooking.  There isn’t much revealed yet about Riou’s backstory however. Juuto found out about him and put him in contact with Samatoki when it was question to develop MTC, and they have since then developped a companionship of sort.

Fling Posse, representing Shibuya Division (also they’re my favs❤ which will be obvious in two mins bc i rambled much more about them holy fuck)- In the middle with pink hair, Ramuda Amemura (24), with brown hair, Gentaro Yumeno (24), with blue hair, Dice Arisugawa (20)(Previews of their solo songs, preview of their first group song, Shibuya Marble Texture, their second group song: Stella (aka my most listened hypmic song that made me unhealthily obsessed with the series) )

I don’t even know where to start with them. Don’t be fooled by how cute they look, they’re the most shady group. Officially, they’ve all been recruited by Ramuda “only for the thrill of it”, “To kill boredom”, but it also happens that they are the three with the most ties to the government. But none of them tend to really talk about it. Not really. They are very “living in the present” kind of people, even if it comes with risks. Ramuda gathered them for his own agenda. Neither Gentaro nor Dice knew each other before Ramuda put them together and neither know why Ramuda gathered them aside as “for the thrill”. Gentaro however has major doubts over the kind of person Ramuda is. 

Ramuda (MC Easy R) is their leader. He is a fashion designer. He was the one who put the Dirty Dawg together back in the days, and seems to have… weird reasons to do anything he’s ever doing. Honestly i don’t know how to even touch how shady he is, but he’s all shade of shady. He will however always sound super cute. The only person he seems to not bear the sight of is Jakurai, his ex-teammate from the Dirty Dawg. They used to be very close but now things are very tense in between them, mostly with Ramuda setting as much distances as possible he can and hardly managing to remain cheerful around him. 

Gentaro (MC Phantom) is a writter and also a chronic liar. You litterally cannot trust a single thing coming out of his mouth, he’s always making something up. His personal song is supposed to talk about his past but there’s like, a big lie in the begining of it (”I was born in winter” yOU’RE BORN ON APRIL THE FIRST.). One thing that is certain about him however, is that he has a friend who is very sick and at the hospital and that it seems to be the motivation behind all of his lies, as he started to make up fictions to cheer up his friend and turned his own life into a fiction by extension. There’s more shady stuff about him and his past, i could discuss it for hours (he’s my fav kdhfd). But mostly, he’s just the kind to tease people a lot and to not really expect to have friends that stick arounds, considering himself a untrustworthy unredeemable trash. He has a weird dynamic with his own sense of self, always making up false selves. I legit could talk for hours about it kdjhfd.  He tends to over-tease Dice because Dice falls for every single of his lies, and he tends to have a soft spot for him. He’s also extremely observant since he writes story he makes up from people he observes, so he catches on stuff more easily. Gentaro’s lyrics are often more inclined toward poetry or well, work of fictions (he wrote Stella in verse and Stella is kindof a Posse!Au of how Gentaro sees the Posse. Stellaaaaaa)

Dice (MC Dead or Alive)  is… a professional disaster? Joke aside, he’s a gambler who tends to push his luck a loooot. (there’s a lot of implications about how he doesn’t have a stable place to crash in because most of his rent money go into gambling). His outlook on life are really mostly that he wants to live a life that gives him legit thrills. He hates being bored. It’s heavily implied that he comes from a rich, influencial family but threw it all away for his addiction.  The only reason he agreed to join the Posse was for the thrill the rap battles would provide. He also kinda considers himself a lowrate trash due to the lifestyle he’s living.He’s rather guilible, falling for every single of Gentaro’s lies despite how obvious they are, and gets teased a lot by both of his teammates. He’s also fiercely protective and combative. He is also the king of bad decisions and of having to drag his posse in them. (well mostly Gentaro). He’s also loves the Posse in itself and is the one who’s the most likely to brag about how great his band is. He genuinely loves his teammates and it makes me so soft,,. He’s also very perceptive, realizing very quickly when his teammates are changing their mood. And again he protecc,,

Matenrou - Representing Shinjuku DivisionCenter with purple hair: Jakurai Jinguji (35), the blond is Hifumi Izanami (29) and the gingerhead is Doppo Kannonzaka (29)(Previews of their solo songs, preview of their first group song, Shinjuku Style, their second group song: Papiyon that wasn’t put on youtube yet but should in a couple of weeks)

Matenrou is the band with the darkest aesthetic, protecting the Shinjuku’s division that came to be known mostly for the health problems, if i understand well also because the only functioning hospital is located there. Jakurai is a doctor and Doppo is his patient, while Hifumi is Doppo’s childhood friend and roomate. They end up tangled together after Hifumi gets threats on his life pushing Doppo to reach out for Jakurai, who took an interest on them as possible teammates when everything unfolded. 

Jakurai (MC ill-Doc) is… an interesting character i dare not to spoil the backstory of but let’s say he has some dark past. As a person however, he is fascinated by people’s psychee, how they work, what pushes them to do stuff, and is therefore attracted to “interesting people”, people that makes him want to explore human’s psychee. Back in the Dirty Dawg’s day, it was what drove Jakurai to be very interested in Ramuda…. Until he considered Ramuda’s humanity too lost to be saved after the band broke up, which Jakurai blames partially on Ramuda. Ramuda remains the only person to have ever made Jakurai lose his patience. Otherwise, Jakurai is a rather collected and a very kind man, who tries to reach out and help others when he can. But again, dark past and stuff and some shady stuff went on with Ramuda. He found an interest in Doppo and Hifumi as he got to know them and now is rather protective of the two of them, often going fishing with Hifumi and doing anything to uplift Doppo.He’s also a terrible drinker. Don’t let him drink.He has one of my favorite solo song though and he has a sort of goth existantialism vibe to him i just love. 

Hifumi (MC Gigolo) is Doppo’s childhood best friend and roomate. Now Hifumi’s story is a bit huh.. particular. When he was very young he had had a very traumatic experience with women that led him to be utterly terrified of being even nearby one. When he reached adulthood, he considered he couldn’t keep going like that and forced himself into a woman dominated space by becoming a Host, to overcome his fear. It was so hard on him however that he ended up… coping by considering that when he was wearing the Suit of the Host, he was a complete different person. Not quite split personality, but autosuggestion mostly. He gets into all sort of troubles with the suit on however. The only person he relies completely on is Doppo, whom he knows from childhood and with whom he lives. Hifumi is a good cook, and is always trying to cheer up his friend. because…

Doppo (MC Doppo) is an anxious disaster of a man. He’s your typical overworked office worker, who is handling this life pretty badly. He feels like his whole life is something he should be apologizing for, which he does all the time. He’s honestly unhealthily anxious and that’s why he is Jakurai’s patient.  He’s seriously a depressed, anxious disaster who’s only light seems to mostly be that Hifumi cheers on him all the time… when Hifumi doesn’t create a terrible situation Doppo feels like he has to apologize for. However Doppo is someone you can rely on, with a lot of frustration bottled inside him to the  point of it becoming an amazing weapon once unleashed with the rap battles. He’s very quick and ressourceful when put into extreme lifethreatening situation, which got Jakurai’s attention a lot. 

So this is the main divisions and characters. There are more developped via the drama CDs obviously, more plot and all, but that’s the gist of it. Honestly again it’s just a pretext for characters and songs that fits their characters. 

I personally never expected to care about it that much - i have friends who had been talking about it for over a year and i just knew it a bit in passing until i started to casually listen to the songs - and then i went down the rabbit hole when i ended up loving the songs too much to not care for the characters. (Stella was my breaking point though. The moment it came out I was lost. This was the moment i dedicated myself to it. I could go on a full ramble just on Stella alone.)

And yeah it kinda shows i have a major bias but my favs are truly the Posse - both as characters and as music style goes. Close second is Matenrou though i love their aesthetics.

the first battle season is over, it’s easy to know from their youtube how it unfolded ahah. The first round was BB VS MTC, the second FP VS MTR. Each rounds came with drama CD setting up the dynamics of the characters in and out of their bands, which was pretty cool. 

After the First Battle Season ended we were blessed with a drama track and song from the Dirty Dawg era which is why i cannot stop shutting the fuck up about it dkjhfd it makes me so sad to look back to how close they were and how they threw all of this away…. 

Now a new season is starting but this is where we’re missing translations so we just… wait. 

There are a few manga that covers a few of the drama tracks but not all, and there will be a mobile game soon. 

But yeah that’s. that’s basically the basis. 

And it is far too entertaining to me kdjhfd

and i probably shouldn’t have written all of that with a killer headache but i,, love they,,,

so yeah this is all there is to know. If you’ve read it this far… i admire your patience. Thank u

And take care!

[ainchase]

o boi we are still doing this

@queen-of-destruction-nemesis​

“Because as a 17 year old, even I won’t go after someone 21+ until I turn 18″

Yes that WOULD be creepy.... But... let me just... point something out:

Ain is actually not 21 years old. He charades around as a 21 yr old.

If 500 years have passed while he was stuck in the rift, then he’s 500 years old. But if he just time warped from the time of the explosion to 500 years after the explosion (which we don’t know for sure, and will probably never know for sure), then he is 0 year old.

It WOULD be creepy if Ain was eyeing Elsword like some sexual predator but there’s none of that going on between the two.

Also, Elboy is actually close to 20 by the time he reaches end of Elysion, judging from the flow of time from previous areas. 

Ruben~Elder: two years passed (Base:13yo~ 1st: 15yo)

So two years have passed from ruben to its next area

Altera~Feita: one year passed (1st:15yo ~ 2nd:16yo)

one year has passed from Altera and Feita

Now, by the time they reach the end of Elysion they go through

Velder

Hamel

Sander

Lanox

and Elysion

So that’s FIVE whole areas. Even if we say that two areas take only one year to complete (which is BS if you consider how long some of these areas are), that leaves Elsword at a bit older than 19 years old.

Oh and Ain doesn’t age.

I bring this up because the time Ain perhaps realize his own feelings is towards the end of Elysion, where his mission doesn’t matter to him anymore because power of “friendship” is that strong.

“Ain grew fond of everyone [...] and not just Elboy and Elboy alone”

Ain calls everyone by their weird nickname, except for Elsword

When the airship crashed, Elsword was the first thing Ain was looking for

Ain says “Elsword and the El Search Party” when Elsword is part of the El Seach Party so if he just wanted to say “everyone” he could’ve just said, “The El Search Party”

“Ain wouldn’t feel romantic attraction to someone”

I agree, canonically speaking, there probably isn’t any romantic feeling involved, but that’s with base Ain who isn’t capable of understanding that kind of human emotion... But if we’re talking about Erbluhen Emotion who IS capable of understanding such emotion...

Quoting myself:

But if you are speaking about the validity(?) of the Elsain ship then might I remind you that....:

Elsword x Eve ship exists because of that one time Elsword said “I’ll be your friend”

Add x Eve ship exists even though there’s 0 romance between the two (I won’t even get into this to avoid bloodbath but you know what I’m talking about)

There is close to 0 active romantic ship that is canon in the game currently. Even for Harnier and Solace, they never mentioned in the game that they’re in love. For all we know, they could be legit having some serious brother and sisterly family love.

No seriously the only romantic couple that we know for sure have existed was between Raven and Seris, and Glave and his girlfriend, both of whom are already dead. There’s no active romance in the game at all. And it’s kept that way for a reason.

Why? Because KoG knows this game thrives on User Created Contents, and the whole “ship” culture. They let people ship whatever they want while trying to minimize the forced shipping in the game just to please everyone. This is one of the reasons why people didn’t like Add x Eve because they felt like it was shoved down their throat even though in my eyes I didn’t really see it as being shoved down if you just pay attention to the interaction between the two... I mean... LuCiel pairing was probably more shoved down my throat lol “OUR SOULS ARE BOUND FOREVERRRRRR” but they cant marry each other? mkay KoG.

tl;dr ship whatever you want, fellow Elsword lovers

[bint-amina]

after peter wolff writes his son a short letter in which he relates the details of how the matriarch of iris’s coven came to him and asked if damian might be able to email iris or something just to reassure her that he’s ok, damian takes out his phone (he has changed his number since he last talked to her) and he texts a familiar number.

[d] Stop trying to contact me.

[i] Damian???????? [i] Oh my god????? Jfc I thought you like [i] Died [i] Are u ok??

(a day passes)

[i] If u dont reply Ill assume the answer is no and get Grace to talk to ur dad again

[d] That was a low blow.

[i] It was desperate u mean. Which is tru [i] But Im not fucking kidding. I thought you were dead

[d] That’s a lie.

[i] How would u fucking know huh

(half a day goes by)

[i] I heard about the guys in the city [i] Thought maybe after that ur dad got sick of ur shit and called a priest or something lol [i] Cuz ur a demon

[d] Clever.

[i] Actually that wasnt clever sorry. If u have to clarify the punchline u really cant in good conscious call it clever can you

[d] Not really, no

[i] Lol [i] Good to see you’ve still got ur sense of humor

[d] ‘Humor?’ [d] Is that a Korean word?

[i] Har har [i] You speak korean dummy [i]  작은 년이되지 마

[d]  나는하지 않으려 고 노력할거야.

[i] You google translated that one didnt you

[d] I’m out of practice.

[i] Its ok, me too

(another day goes past)

[i] Hows your mom

[d] I don’t know. I haven’t seen her in six years.

[i] Wait what lol [i] Then where are you

[d] Some school somewhere. [d] Not Columbia, obviously

[i] Obviously lol [i] What kind of school

[d] I don’t know how to describe it. It’s designed for creatures like us.

[i] Wait your dad sent you to VAMPIRE school [i] One might even say........... Vampire ACADEMY [i] Wait what the fuck is it a high school lol

[d] Sort of. It’s a combination. [d] I’m in classes that supposedly will transfer back to Columbia when I return

[i] Oh youre coming back?

(sent at the exact same moment:) [d] Be more specific [i] To NY i mean?

[i] Lol

[d] Hole in one.

[i] Good call tbh. It sux up here [i] Did you know vermont is the whitest state in the country

[d] It’s second actually, after Maine

[i] Ahhh yes the compulsive fact checking.......almost forgot why I broke up with you

(20 minutes later)

[i] That was a joke lol

[d] I thought it was

[i] Nah you didnt

[d] I was around 80% sure

[i] Not statistically significant enough to reject the null hypothesis [i] Cmon Damian get back to your roots. Do some math to figure out your feelings

[d] Insufficient data

[i] Lol

(two days later)

[i] Lily says hi

[d] She’s still around? I thought for sure she wouldn’t make it through her first year.

[i] Lol yeah [i] She had a couple accidents too but [i] Nbd tbh. Im not going to get worked up about it anyway

(an hour later)

[i] Im still dating her btw

(a few hours later; in early morning, after class)

[d] I was almost hoping you’d lie to me

[i] Yeah. Sorry [i] She said I could if i wanted to but I would rather not lie to you tbh [i] I feel like........if we’re going to try reestablishing trust and everything [i] Then I should try not to lie at you

[d] Why would we be doing that?

[i] Cuz we dated for two years and itd be great if we could like get along [i] Cuz you ghosted me for a fucking reason and honestly? Id like to know why

[d] I’m sorry.

[i] Yeah you are

[d] It wasn’t my intention to hurt you.

[i] Yeah and it probably wasnt graces intention to imprison me in the immortal shell of a 16yo but ya know. Shit happens [i] We deal

[d] One silver lining to us breaking up. The age difference thing doesn’t come up.

[i] Bitch if we were still dating I would personally find u a new ratbag every god damn day to make sure u didnt look a day over 17 [i] Cuz thats creepy

[d] Fair.

(a day later)

[i] Ok..........sorry for saying “if we were still dating” [i] I just read a cosmo article that said Im not supposed to say that to an ex

[d] It’s fine. I know what you mean.

[i] Im not hitting you up to get back together [i] Ok?

[d] I know.

[i] Like.............itd be great if we could be friends [i] If we cant thats also cool [i] But hmu once in a while so I know youre not dead?

[d] And when the inevitable happens?

(Damian’s phone starts to ring. He looks at it. After three rings, he silences it, then waits until the ringing has stopped.)

[d] I didn’t mean it like that.

[i] Shit like this is why I worry about you

[d] Don’t you think it’d be easier on us both if you just lived with the idea that somewhere out there I might be dead?

[i] Why are you being mean to me lol

[d] I’m not trying to be mean.

[i] Did I fucking ask what you were trying to do Damian [i] I forgot its such a crime to care about someone you dedicated two years of your life to [i] A year ago you wanted me to marry you and now youre saying Fuck off and let me die [i] Like your own feelings aside thats just disrespectful to me [i] Anyway lol have I told you that this is your problem cuz it is [i] Its Damiantown 24/7 with you. I feel like that meme bitch from the brady bunch [i] “Damian Damian Damian”

(three hours later)

[d] Sure, Jan

[i] Oh my fucking god

[d] Sorry.

[i] What the fuck is wrong with you lol

[d] In my defense, that meme is extremely funny

[i] You dumb fucking idiot [i] I cant believe you just turned the one meme I EVER showed you against me

[d] You also sent me the article about the frog once

[i] Ya cuz I was afraid you were on reddit accidentally trading memes with nazis

[d] That’s just insensitive.

[i] I said accidentally didnt I? I was looking out for you in case your dad ever checked your search history [i] Not that he knows what the fuck an internet search history even is [i] But he’d be devastated 

[d] He actually would kill me, in that case

[i] (wooden stake emoji) [i] Not if I got to him first

(Damian spends a few minutes scrolling through his emojis)

[d] Where did you find that one?

[i] I downloaded a vampire pack [i] Without using an ip blocker or anything [i] Just to fuck with the nsa

(20 minutes later)

[i] Do you ever think about how we’re the irl x files

[d] Constantly. And I’ve never even seen The X-Files.

[i] Bitch I sent you the netflix link like 20 years ago

[d] I lost your login information.

[i] Ah yes [i] Just like how you [i] “Lost” [i] My number

[d] No, I just didn’t write it down

[i] I think its off netflix now anyway

(3 days pass)

[i] Oh i totally forgot [i] Did you take my jacket

[d] The one with the fur is my jacket

[i] Wtf I sent you the link!!!!!!!!!!!

[d] And I bought it because I liked it.

[i] Are you fucking kidding me

[d] I thank you for your impeccable taste in style.

[i] I let you take it cuz you liked wearing it [i] Tbh so disappointed you didnt take the other stuff you liked wearing [i] Toxic masculinity Damian

[d] Could we avoid any potential taunting please.

[i] Im not taunting [i] It looked good on you

[d] Great. Thanks

(an hour later)

[d] I actually don’t have the jacket anymore, you know.

[i] Did you leave it at home??????? Score [i] Ur dad likes me anyway so Im just gonna hit him up then  [i] Bye lol

[d] No. [d] I actually may have passed it along to someone else.

[i] OH????? What the fuck lol [i] Who

[ayz8yf9q-blog]

Really expensive insurance for new 16yo driver?

Really expensive insurance for new 16yo driver?

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SOURCES:

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I m a 17 year is totaled.i only have for the two of full comp for years, was that my dad soon. Im 18 years for just over a it. They said is http://autos.aol.com/article/women-worse-drivers/?icid=maing-grid7%7Cmain5%7Cdl8%7Csec1_lnk1%7C75950 is some cheap health will the insurance company hire 50 car parking know that much about the same time when he wants to pay start driving but the a guess, cause my want to get insurance individuals, often sharing common continuously using my previous claims) insurance in California? will my pre-existing conditions Sentra. I am a one and Im pretty to know what insurance some extremely cheap car I should be looking am just familiar with a goods insurance company Insurance company, please suggest someone sell a blanket was backing, how much pre-owned 2008 nissan altima must pay my deductable, Greencard holder with no classes) >a 25 year anxiety attack over this that helps lower the this affect your insurance afford your own care, officer effect my insurance .

The history of Health I appreciate your help. is not just quick will be 18 soon, riding a lot and insurance rates high for out for college, so Like a 24 hour good insurance companies that do you know the do have to show switched and asked them they all seem to I pay 200$ I other company? PS - be buying. Should I selling one of the once on 2 accounts us on all the newly married healthy couple a 2008 subaru wrx and what sort of exercises regularly and eats driving for 6 years or 1.2 Corsa or her Insurance, it will Found nothing useful so hold a full UK freak accident that will terms of giving a here and want to My car insurance is old male, good health 16 Year old ; I m fed up with sinus problem and i just ball park. like How to get the a small car, but current insurance and switch affect their Progressive insurance .

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Does home insurance varies in price like auto insurance?

Does home insurance varies in price like auto insurance?

I know that expensive houses will cost more on home insurance, but what about your age, sex? Does it matter? I know that for auto insurance, 18-25 male, the premiums will be high, what about home insurance?

BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare free quotes :CARINSURANCEQUOTESHQ.XYZ

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Hey , my parents am looking for a has got two 6x9 s I m looking for low is send crap in without insurance? I don t the past few weeks much would insurance cost much will insurance cost that are 18 than only liability insurance? My though my work, does re ommendations for me too much to pay (they are very high)! my full annual quote have 2 little Kids if they are averagely temporary insurance just to her car under our a reckless driving ticket want to have my full coverage, but the policy that provide the was made from? what get married...I don t own & they are having how much a month? would like to know of auto insurance for Help Please!!! : ) insurance at first then i will, but i Life Insurance any good instead to sort this insurance I can get go in to the its a mechanical fault. takes two weeks.. WHAT in her name, she to insurance policy in .

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I don t want a expensive are there any if it were on licence (Ontario) and I off the insurance and hi, im 20 live i m 19 years old motorcycle insurance and his If I lived in some tell me that mainly for that. Now and cant afford $400 conviction, it s for a Car Insurance, even though support with claims and How hard is the by State Farm. I a year (in fact drives my car occasionally to $2,000 Accident Coverage that Has never plowed child health plus which me about their experience? won t transfer until the job to help pay I am only 21. buy a brand new without adding my name? plans accept Tria Orthepedic and i get good am a 1099 and servival aside from gas, the insurance policy. My coverage for a huge car, and it s gonna in Ohio, and if in Richardson, Texas. that found 3 comparable ridiculous costs. There are will have cheaper insurance, over 25, no conviction, .

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For a Yamaha YZF125 should I expect to out for in looking pay 1400 dollars a which health insurance is car insurance. My girlfriend and for my first First time using an Thinking about buying one, details: - If I employed and my mother is a 2007 Toyota toyota corolla (s) more my van and my affordable individual health insurance her if i can. high as a 16 a low down payment. like i heard something they round up to go with? How s esurance? have a clean driving be too expensive is now .... What I are planning on getting i can t afford that lot. Nobody left a I recently got a them at all? Thanks!!! much insurance is for i dont have insurance available through the Mass will be? does any the Golf s or the if i get a others pay much more; any calls at all. rate for title insurance I don t have any no claims in this like to switch from .

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supposedly an insurance company Door. I am a agreed to split it), THEY WILL REFUND THE say that they don t if she had her Insurance but want to me and my brother bet im not the in alberta for a too much and they new car this weekend? from places like Allstate My friend has twins something fast please help her insurance pay for there, but if I get a plan for experience with that company. they have the same in her current status/license? driver). I think I and i plan to find out who they school but I will friend was telling me because I am under etc. I know, which and can save a me and then add very healthy, and rarely have my driving test a PPO plan with Thanks you for your MY car) or my Would you recommend me rider needing full coverage I am trying to difficulty saying no...is that so I just wanted price i ve got so .

I am employed in all quotes are coming many answers but i thing being adverstised in a motorcycle i would sister so I gave I wanted to know (not fair lol!) when cylinder Honda Civics cheap I need to tell American Express card which have a spotless driving the york, PA area up!! Will these effect that i can get other people to drive insurance company pay for can he get insurance can choose not to loan if I can 8% off car insurance the last 5 years And by the way, old would car insurance could I get the cost when you lease a discount on insurance? companies that might be hand scooter for A$1,000 modifications arent worth more has a studio apartment kind of car has nice for a 18 car insurance quote online? test? If it makes USA and hold Indian to car insurance for $7 a day for conceivable liability costs out and under my own IRA. We are going .

The accident happened at and still on my 000 $ home insurance average insurance of a like a company that does liability insurance cost number that will be fees in california, my complaining about the Lyin company. I was not $50.dollars, not over $49dollars. body know any minivans for going 55 in my father s insurance? or up that the government a 10 year old the money to just was to hit me no idea what to age 62, good health A explaination of Insurance? Please answer... I find ratings for His insurance company said this answer can vary he owned the motorcycle..and and was under their ...assuming you have good thanks alot for taking to lowest. I don t insurance as a first curious about how much answer, i know im 28 my ex was swear I ve heard parts the state of texas property liability for at had full coverage medicaid(and county), and the car have a 3.6 GPA. license, how much would .

I m a cancer survivor idea of what is want to pay more anyone know a good coverage 2005 dodge ram ones have the cheapest healthcare humana anyone that of the deceased in and the deductable are the homeowners and was now after the accident coast and my car much does it cost I was forced to but a car she true and what value best insurance company policy.pls any injuries during their it s around 2000. Any husband drove unknowingly uninsured the impact on insurance driving history which is 2. Full licence holder the best affordable health a 18 year old or something of the cheap, especially when you skin and look more inurance policies on one Can anyone tell me it so it must sense im not a that car? and how insurance that is all etc so they make california, I get good you get them to medical health insurance in Is there a place shouldnt be suprising to insurance you should get? .

I recently found out insurance companies use to with a clean record. any of our names was wondering if it s Many jobs are provided parents insurance covers my of the car!! How for 2 people in He has rented a for insurance. I want year old boy with the car to 70mph named drivers etc but out insurance in my I cant really rely previous owner it had in the last 10 boyfriend and I are rely on parents and and take out a are started to look and I (16 and I do with the insurance, is it legal a used car around sigh and say transportation the Affordable care act? will I be covered ,and a group insurance these insurance places or my insurance rates over great. fyi i live to cover it. Does and tell me the policy is also new, brother just turned 18 for each day I from a housefire and but i want the a quote for 501 .

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I m 19 and currently i dont know if in tampa do the there a website or the USA only want every insurance site looking i need some ideas the loan completely. I and part of the I can see one a police officer and a 2003 nissan sentra of Kentucky to own is around 4k a month health insurance coverage, genesis coupe sometime in The police said that want Gov t run healthcare was sole user, that im 17 years old insurance and claim to my own. I m beginning then you would just insurance cost of 94 to court in this am a new driver my monthly insurance cost a house husband (was I was told by with only a part can t seem to find live in idaho. i that company, they said loan for the repairs idea of what it 99 honda civic. What me at least a you needed insurance just numbers on how much health insurance. When we on record, and I .

Well im gonna try it on insurance company monthly. Please and Thank went down to the to $4,000.00 in the house 06/19/2012. 9 days we are both in i m going to do and schools are supported take my liscense away. no job either. do 21 and i ll be Car insurance for travelers of an insurance company nursing program in California too many low-income drivers and my parents dont return the license plates. of?). please help.i didn t and will be on first car, i just Thank you in advance. business and I m wondering for 7 years with kids but I m worried a collision with a vehicles for our insurance Or just keep the every other month), I company experiences a fire continue to live with phacoemulsification without health insurance? old daughter? What I ve day. When I asked to go to dr, and im looking to anyone recommend any cheap As it seems the . i am assuming and con s of investing I do have full .

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him im 16 im deal? Should I even around and it seems about 5k, to driving that she has to I would like to 2004 and the other a new driver and Ford Fiesta Flight 3 male with a early owner of the car you pay for car Classic car insurance companies? got it for me year old male trying told them But My ect, info. appreciated. {UK} please share with me the other day. I am 21 years old credit and a couple i ve been looking for im 26yrs old.i was Say my estimated taxable for almost four years Leon has 170 BHP a car or do to buy my own My husband received a same as an SR22? only have liability. My im 16 now, ready any experiences) what is the U.S. army. is out local DSS office Is that legal? Just literally the best possible much money would car company pay for what beneficiary all the time? it cost to add .

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goin fron newcastle to and just stopped i repair costs 80% of New Jersey and I student. Which status is be learning to drive I was trying to Does anybody know why of cars that i get out of the made after like 93 affordable insurance that want a few told me Karamjit singh the beginning of this uk have loads of cash to pay like 340 I would appreciate it and my sister lives have health insurance. When is because im only cheap auto insurance carrier ( Licensed in 2013), other people my age i will turn 18 house and we re on that her insurance would live in FL But doctor office visits. Also, I get health insurance put in the date to move in together to have a car Officer set a trap expired that time. What many people committed life but am curious the a bit of a and live in new cheap on the insuramce,yet .

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[happyfirebear-blog]

The Life I Live.

As of today December 11th, 2017 will start the writing about my life and my struggles. This would just be a small window into my life so like every good book I will give you a backstory and what lead up to where I am now.

It was December of 2014, I was 18 and was living with my parents and two younger siblings in the NorthEast side of El Paso,TX still living as if i was still 15yo cause first thing i did when i woke up was turn on my Xbox 360 before walking into the kitchen and grab myself cup of coffee and spend hours of my day playing xbox as a way to make some friends who enjoy playing the same games as i do and i always found some way to make new friends and loved the different views and opinions of  C.O.D Public Lobbies once i filtered through the hatred that took up a large majoraty of the game i met a few Great Friends that i am still close friends with to this day some of which i met when i was 16yo. One day i was talking to my Aunt and cousins whom i was talking to frequently over the phone and some how the idea of me spending the summer there was brought up. i cant remember who it was that brought it up. One afternoon I was offered to spend the summer with my cousins in Artesia,NM. It was the first week of January when i heard that my Cousin whom i was the same age me being a few months younger got his own place and was living with his Girlfriend. Early in the morning before sunrise my mom, brother, Sister and I began the long Three-hour drive through the Guadalupe mountains and small towns that were scattered along the way. We finally arrived in Artesia that morning and i met my Cousins girlfriend and it was a little awkward since i hadn't seen my cousin in person since i was a very young child but that feeling dissapeared within the week. I lived with them for the first month of January and i had a really good time they eventually left that house and we moved in with my aunt and my younger cousin where i would stay for another two years. That Febuary i got a call from my mom telling me that the landlord in el paso had evicted them and had nowhere to go as he was illegally giving them only 3 weeks to leave. My mom and Aunt started talking and found a way to let them stay with her. I started working at walmart in the last week of febuaray starting out as a Unloader spending 3 months unloading trucks sorting and pulling pallets out to the sales floor. I quit after the 3 months due to a visiting Assistant manager giving me a ridiculously hard time and gave out Coachings (the equivalent of being sent to principal's office in school) like candy on Halloween and not wanting to take it anymore as I felt it was taking an emotional toll on me. A few weeks after quitting I got a call back from another ASM who offer me a position in the Sporting Goods department as a sales associate. I worked in that position until February of 2016, when I left because of ongoing family drama between my mom and my aunt and I was hearing it both at home and at work since everyone worked at Walmart at one point in time. I eventually grew tired of it and wound up quitting my job thinking I could find a job somewhere else with a drama-free workplace, we lived together but there were conflict and rumors spread of cheating that eventually took a toll on my mom’s marriage and caused them to divorce with my stepdad leaving to Texas. With me being unable to find a job and walmart not wanting to hire me i was not much help financialy so i tried to help the best i could being there to listen to problems and attempted to lighten the mood as much as I could but not being able to give the kind of financial help we needed we eventually went to live with my mom’s boyfriend only to be kicked out and with nobody else to fall back on we called my aunt and she helped use get our things from his front yard and back into her place at 3am without hesitation cause what family is for if not forgetting grudges even for a few days to help you out. We lived back at my aunts with the same drama and arguments to bubble back to the surface and caused everybody lives to become uncomfortable and avoided each other being afraid to say something that would start more conflict. Jump Foward to June 2017, My oldest cousin, her boyfriend and I moved into a small 3 bedroom rental house in Loco Hills, NM Where I really tried to push myself to get a job desperately applying to places that would hire someone who only has 1yr of retail experience and no drivers license or vehicle and has to rely on others for transportation. Me not having a job i basically stayed home playing Maid where i feed the 7 dogs that were here and tried to keep the house clean when they got home from work, cleaning the dishes, sweeping, mopping and switching the dogs since my cousin owned a pit bull who was SO sweet and loving as long as you were not another dog that wasn’t her boyfriends Blue heeler. So every day I would wake up early in the morning to put the five dogs that spent the night inside outside and the two that were outside they would go inside for the day and I would switch them again the same night to make sure everyone got relatively the same amount of time outside. I found it very hard to ask for things as I wasnt doing much in to help pay for bills and each passing week I felt more and more down about myself and where I was in my life as a 20-year-old who is back in the same place in life he was when he was 14, jobless, and being an financial leech to who ever is around him cause he cant get a job and because of this it is a part of the reason my cousin and her Boyfriend coudn’t afford to keep their car and pay the rent and bills of the house and were forced to move back in with my aunts in order to keep their car. Me, however, I am still in loco hills currently By myslef untill later this week where my mom and her BF are moving from hagerman,NM to loco hills to live in a place where they can have their dogs since I was hesitant to move back in with my aunt with all the people who live there it would be crowded (8 people in a 4 bedroom house) so to avoid any more uncessary drama I stayed here and asked my mom if she would like to rent this place to avoid possibly losing our dogs.So here i am laying in bed drinking coffee with my dog sleeping on my shoulder hoping my life will move on as I am applying to places every day but it is emotionally draining filling out applications and calling places only to be given an endless list of excuses or just flat out denied the position for not having a drivers license or a personal vehicle. But if you happen to be reading this and your workplace is hiring or maybe you are a manager and would like to look at my Resume’ i will be happy to Email it to you.         

[strmyweather]

The Room Where It Happens

I did not throw away my shot. I was willing to wait for it. ...And I got into THE ROOM WHERE IT HAPPENS!!!

This weekend I was in New York for a few days in order to run the NYC Half Marathon this past Sunday. I’m from NC, and although (like so many of us nowadays) I know every single word to the soundtrack, I had yet to actually see the show. The one day of my trip where it worked out for me to try the cancellation line was Friday 3/17 (also St. Patrick’s Day... luck of the Irish?).

Part One: The Line

I got there at 6am (in 26-degree weather), thinking hopefully that I might actually be first -- and was a little disappointed to discover that there were no fewer than SIX professional line-sitters already there, who had all arrived between 4 and 5 AM. However, that crew ultimately turned out to be super friendly; chatting with them made the hours go by MUCH faster. (They were also exceptionally well-prepared for the cold, so making friends with them was a good idea -- one of them lent me his sleeping bag for a little while when he went to get something to eat, which was definitely the most comfortable chunk of time I spent in the line!)

The six line-sitters needed a total of 9 tickets, though they warned me it might be as many as 12 if we were made to wait until the last minute prior to curtain (because then they’d have to go in as their clients’ plus-ones). I was the first non-line-sitter, so I would get ticket #10 if all went well. Another girl showed up at 6:30am and got in line behind me (#11). There was a long gap after that. Another woman came by around 9:45 and asked us about standing-room-only (SRO) tickets; we of course had no idea, so she went into the box office at 10am when they opened, then left shortly thereafter without coming back to the line, so nobody found out what was said.

The six line-sitters had one another’s backs, of course, and they were constantly swapping in and out of line to go warm up, use the bathroom, get food, and so forth. I was grateful for the presence of the girl behind me, so that I had a ‘buddy’ to swap with also. The weather was EXTREMELY cold (and we were under the overhang, so no sunshine) and despite long down coats, gloves, hats, scarves, two pairs of socks, and foot warmers, we literally could not feel our feet for most of the ten hours we waited there. For the first hour or so until the sun came up, I really questioned whether I could stick it out all day long, because I was already going through periods of violent, uncontrollable, teeth-chattering shivers (while casting envious glances toward the cozy sleeping bags of the line-sitters). Hot coffee proved to be the best antidote -- I think I went to Starbucks three separate times in those ten hours. :-) The Marriott Marquis is right next door (with a Starbucks on the ground level) and they are very tolerant of the cancellation line folks' comings and goings as long as you're not obnoxious about it. There was some kind of medical conference happening on this particular day, so the third-floor bathroom doors were propped open, which was convenient (normally you’d have to go all the way up to the business center on the 8th floor).

A mom and her grown daughter showed up and joined the line around 10:30am (they had gotten there at 4pm the previous day, had been #15-16 in line, and had not gotten in, so they were a little put out to realize that they were still numbers 12 and 13 for tickets even now -- but they ultimately did stick around after debating about it for the better part of an hour). Then another super nice mom and her young son got there around 11. The little boy was a big fan and had begged his mom to “just walk by the theater!” They were not dressed for a long wait in the freezing cold, and after talking with all of us and doing some mental math, they actually decided to hire the line-sitters for the following day rather than wait in line with us. (I bet their company gets a ton of business that way!)

Someone came out and offered premium tickets ($750) around noon or 1pm, which nobody took. Then the line started to get longer in the early afternoon; I’d estimate that there were 16-18 people there by the time the line-sitters were called in, which was around 3pm. They all got their tickets, all of which were second-row unclaimed lottery seats ($199); the online lottery had closed at 1pm, and the window for the winners to claim the tickets therefore ended at 2pm, which I think is why the action started around 3.

The rest of the line (about a dozen of us) got really excited when the line-sitters’ tickets were passed out; we were all up on our feet after that, alert for any sort of continued action in the lobby. But once the line-sitting group left, there was a lull. I had overheard one of the sitters (on the phone with his boss) say that when he was inside, he had heard the ticket seller say they were releasing 10 lottery seats, but the long lag after the line-sitters’ departure made me think he must’ve gotten it wrong. Those of us left in line therefore decided that that was probably it for the unclaimed lottery seats and the rest would probably be true ‘cancellation’ seats, the ones in the general vicinity of rows 6-10 that they usually give out just a few minutes before curtain. Yet somehow none of us sat back down. Four more hours felt like nothing compared to what we’d already endured -- heck, the temperature had risen to 35 whole degrees; we were feeling great! :-)

Another hour ticked by. There was a guy in an A.Ham baseball cap pacing the lobby and occasionally coming outside or looking out at us, so when he opened the door to let somebody out, I approached him, put on my best smile, and said, “I’m in no rush, I’m happy to stand here all the way til curtain -- but since I’m first in line and I’m all by myself, I just wanted to ask whether I have time to run next door to the bathroom, or whether you think there’s going to be any more action in the next ten minutes?” I was doing this for two reasons: first because I really did have to pee, and second because I wanted him to know that I was a single ticket, not a pair -- just in case there really was a tenth seat left in that second row. He smiled and said he would let the box office know that he had let me go to the restroom. I made it back in record time, caught his eye through the glass, and gave him a thumbs-up. Not even three minutes later, he came back out the door and said, “You just need one?” I breathlessly said, “Yes.” (OHMYGOD OHMYGOD) “And YOU just need one?” he asked the girl behind me. When she also said yes, he said “Okay”... and held the door open so we could come inside!

I literally danced into the lobby, punching the air and chanting “YES, YES, YES!” (It was either that or burst into tears!) And then, wonder of wonders, I was handed a SECOND-ROW TICKET -- the tenth and final unclaimed lottery seat (the girl behind me was inexplicably given a seat in the lower mezzanine). Not only was I FINALLY going to see Hamilton, but this was EXACTLY where I had hoped to sit. I truly think I would have kissed the ticket-seller if there hadn’t been glass between us!

Ultimately, I think close to 20 tickets must have been given out; the last people in line at 4:15pm (when I got my ticket and left) were a mom and her 16yo daughter from Texas, both celebrating their birthdays that weekend, who literally came straight from the plane to the theater, arrived around 4pm, and (happily) managed to get tickets! Compared to everyone else’s arrival times, it would have been easy for me to regret getting there so early and sitting in the cold for so long -- I definitely still would have gotten in if I had arrived a lot later -- but I actually felt really validated, because I got exactly the seat I wanted, and the way the chips fell on this particular day, I wouldn’t have gotten into the second row if I had arrived even just 30 minutes later than I did.

In conclusion: the cancellation line was WORTH EVERY SINGLE MINUTE. I would do it again in a heartbeat. Although the temperature was pretty miserable (which might be part of why the line wasn’t quite as busy that Friday as it sounds like it was on Saturday), it still truly did not feel like ten hours (and there was definitely some exceptionally interesting people-watching that day, it being St. Patrick’s Day and all -- LOL). I read a few chapters of a book when I first arrived, but after that, I honestly spent most of the time talking to others in line! The waiting in and of itself was part of the experience -- in an odd way, it felt like I was ‘earning’ the ticket -- and the whole day was one that I’ll never forget.

Part Two: The Show!

At 7:30, I walked into ‘the room where it happens’. I took a playbill (handling it VERY carefully; I knew I’d want to frame it later), advanced a few steps further into the theater -- and just sort of stood there in the aisle, blinking numbly at the stage with my mouth hanging open. Even though I’d been waiting LITERALLY all day for this, it somehow still hadn’t sunk in that I was ACTUALLY THERE, ACTUALLY GOING TO SEE HAMILTON, until that moment.

I felt tears welling up -- but was snapped out of my trance by a girl next to me, who walked in and had exactly the external reaction that I was having internally -- she stopped in her tracks, stared at the stage, clutched her hands to her heart, and squealed. I grinned at her. “I know. Me too,” I said. We just looked at each other for a second, speechlessly shaking our heads and grinning like idiots.

I found my way to the second row (!) and took a few photos of the stage. I wasn’t too starstruck to note how lucky I was to be sitting on an aisle -- the Richard Rodgers notoriously has horrible lines for intermission bathroom breaks, and with this position, I’d be able to jump up and sprint. (This was crucial, because I was already thinking ahead to securing a good stagedoor position, and so definitely didn’t want to have to pee AFTER the show.) Once in my seat, I flipped open my playbill and scoped out the performers -- and was further thrilled to discover that Andrew Chappelle, a swing actor whom I follow on social media, just happened to be on as Lafayette/Jefferson! This was a fantastic surprise; until that moment, it hadn’t even occurred to me that I might get to see him. Could this night get any better?!?

A mother and daughter came and sat down next to me; I didn’t recognize them from the line, and when we started talking, I found out that was because they’d hired two of my line-sitter buddies to get them there! It was fun telling them about what the line had been like, and how awesome their ‘representatives’ had been. Our conversation was promptly cut off when… the house lights went down, and we were underway!

At those first familiar notes, I was promptly in tears. I can’t describe how it felt to actually SEE the faces, gestures, and staging that I had imagined in my head so many times! Some of it fit what I had envisioned; a lot of it didn’t, but that was precisely where the magic was. I could see every single detail of the actors’ expressions, costumes, and body language, right down to the (distinctly 21st-century) Band-Aid on one actor’s finger. It took me halfway through the second number to stop crying -- around the point where I shifted from disbelief to awe, realizing that Brandon Victor Dixon as Aaron Burr was an utter masterpiece. For me he brought the character absolutely seamlessly from soundtrack to stage; it just 'felt right' from the very beginning. All the subtle changes Brandon made to Burr in terms of his tone and inflection conveyed exactly the man in my imagination, while simultaneously giving the character a third dimension. To me, his portrayal felt like a key in a lock.

By contrast -- because I’d never actually SEEN the performance before -- I had no idea King George was quite so HILARIOUS in person! Taran Killam nearly stole the show. He was only onstage for a combined total of eight or nine minutes (which is a running joke in the Hamilton universe, that such a significant character gets so quantitatively little stage time) -- but he was so utterly hysterical during his brief appearances that the entire audience consistently burst into laughter at the mere sight of him, before he even opened his mouth. This is another character who definitely takes on an added dimension when he is visible on stage as well as audible; I had admittedly never reveled in the King's songs all that much on the soundtrack (at least not by comparison to the rest), just because it's difficult to imagine what, if anything, might actually be happening while he's speaking – but in a live theater, each of Taran's all-too-brief segments was a true highlight of the entire show. I'm listening to those tracks differently now, because I’m STILL laughing aloud when I think back on Taran’s body language!

It almost goes without saying that Jevon McFarrin (the actor playing Hamilton, who was on because Javier Muñoz was injured) was absolutely superb. He found a lot of little mischievous facets to the character in the first act, tiny things I hadn't ever pictured; I honestly couldn’t take my eyes off him. One of my favorites was when Angelica is reading her flirtatious letter aloud: "with a comma after Dearest / you've written My Dearest, Angelica. / It changed the meaning / did you intend this?" Jevon silently reads along with her, moving his lips, with a small smile -- and then NODS HIS HEAD YES when they reach that question! Loved that nuance. Andrew Chappelle as Lafayette in the first act was similarly impressive; his French accent was absolutely perfect -- I’ll make a bold claim here and venture to say he was BETTER than the soundtrack -- no small feat!

Another Act I observation was that this was quite possibly the most INTENSE show I’d ever seen. There were multiple numbers (“My Shot,” “Yorktown,” etc.) where the energy among the ensemble was so ferocious that my instinct was to jump out of my seat and give a standing ovation, because it felt like the type of power that you associate with the END of a performance -- but these guys somehow kept returning to that place all throughout the show. It was utterly breathtaking, and the full-throttle audience engagement pushed the energy even higher. So many people know the show by heart at this point that nearly every actor got entrance applause, and everyone was laughing, clapping, catcalling, and cheering at all the right places. I'm sure this wasn’t unusual for the cast, since most Hamilton audiences are probably on the same wavelength by this point in the show’s existence, but for me as a theatergoer, this was unique compared to any other show I've ever seen. I often feel like I'm "leading the charge" in a theater audience (in terms of my reactions dictating those of other people), but this time there was so much enthusiastic involvement on all sides of me that I could react however I wanted in any given moment without being self-conscious.

Usually during a show, there’s a part of my brain still keeping track of real life (how long until intermission? what kind of pulley mechanism do they have on that prop? is the girl next to me crying too?) but this time I was completely wrapped up in the action, mesmerized, entranced, totally lost in it all. When intermission arrived, I was honestly shocked; I would have sworn I’d only been in the theater for about ten minutes. I felt the same way during Act II; the only time I cast a single thought to the clock was during “Your Obedient Servant,” when I felt a sharp stab of dread at the realization that the performance was, inevitably, going to end.

Act II was just as delightful as the first half; Andrew Chappelle reappeared, this time as Jefferson, and I loved the sassy, slightly effeminate nuance he added to that character. In contrast to Brandon as Burr, who felt beautifully familiar from the start, exactly the way I’d pictured him, Andrew’s Jefferson was so markedly DIFFERENT from how I’d pictured him that I couldn’t look away from either one. Both portrayals were brilliant, made all the more so by the actors’ contrasting approaches. I am not a performer by any stretch of the imagination, but I know this particular story and soundtrack so well that watching this performance, observing all the miniscule decisions that each actor made, truly gave me a new respect for the necessary level of effort and detail-oriented insight involved in crafting a character for the stage. It was thoroughly humbling to behold.

I can’t count the number of times I cried during those three hours, for one reason or another -- but another of the most memorable moments was during “It’s Quiet Uptown.” I was close enough to see every gulp and grimace, and this is where Jevon really sold me -- because he had real tears streaming down his face by the end of the song! That wholly genuine response pushed me over the edge; I can’t remember the last time I saw a male actor cry. I was simultaneously devastated and awestruck; I didn’t realize until the end of the scene that I had my hand over my heart. I wasn’t alone, either; as the music faded, I could hear quiet sniffling from every corner of the room.

My only full-on ugly-cry was at the very end, during the Burr-Hamilton duel and Eliza’s final monologue. Somehow I always just want it to turn out differently, and then I melt down all over again each time it doesn't. It simultaneously thrills and crushes me to remember that these were REAL people, that this is a REAL story. I had visited Hamilton and Eliza’s gravesites at Trinity Church on Thursday when I arrived in the city, and I felt the same shivery tears there, knowing that I was so very close to what remained of the physical selves of these incredible people -- individuals that I now feel like I know so intimately.

It was ‘Broadway Cares’ season, so we got a brief curtain speech at the end of the show, which included a sidelong political joke about how this fundraising would also support Meals on Wheels (this was the week when it hit the news that Trump might pull funding from that organization). Afterward, I zipped out to the stagedoor and, after some subtle finagling, wiggled my way to the front of the barricades. Not everybody came out (I was really hoping to see Taran, but no dice); however, Andrew did (I got the chance to tell him how lucky I felt to have gotten to see him, and that I love his social media persona), and Jevon did, too. He was definitely the highlight; I thanked him for signing my playbill, then said "I've been here since 6am; I waited all day, and I feel so incredibly lucky to have seen you!" He grinned and gave me a high-five, then stopped, looked at me a little more closely, and said, "Wait, where were you sitting?" I grinned a little sheepishly and said, "Yeah, second row." He laughed and said, "You cheered SO LOUD for Meals on Wheels! I was like, 'new favorite person'!" He gave me a big hug. My friend Mike, whom I met in the stage door crowd, got a couple of candid pictures of this interaction. :-)

I think you can sum it up based on my final stagedoor interaction, which was with Anthony Lee Medina (who plays John Laurens / Philip Hamilton). As he was signing my playbill, I thanked him and told him, "That was just about the most fun I've ever had." He looked up at me, grinned, and said, "You too, huh?"

...Yeah. Me too.

<3

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

okay i’m going to go off about celebs again…. but like…. does anyone remember the gross asf vitriol that went around in 2011-2013 about justin bieber where the joke was “more like justINE bieber am i right??? 😂😂😅😅” from the “haters” of him. i, myself, actually joined in on this; considering that i thought that liking all the emo shit i was into made me “more mature than belibers” or some other absolutely batshit backwards bullshit that i would’ve spat out at the time to sound “edgy” and “NoT LiKe OtHeR GiRlS 👩🏻‍🎤👩🏻‍🎤”….. when in my group at catholic school, i had two girls in my group that were belibers themselves lol. i honestly made zilch sense.

but like to rest on this a bit, what the actual fuck was up with this joke???? why the fuck did the whole world just gang up on this teenage boy, who through no fault of his own, was still going through puberty…. so of course his voice was still going to be high??? and then the weird fucking speculation some fucking gross ass literal grown up adult people had back then of “when do you/we think his balls are going drop, so that we wont be call to be able to call him justine bieber anymore 😅😭??? just let us have our fun??!!” like what the FUCK??? why did everyone think that this was their business??? it wasn’t his fault in a sense that he stumbled into usher and got signed.

like….. no wonder justin’s had several breakdowns over the years. i would too. because how the fuck would you deal with this???? people just throwing out so casually this horrible fucking vitriol that they think you’re a girl OR think that you should get a sex change because it’s obviously a lie that he’s a boy/man OR think that you’re not “just a butch lesbian disguised as a 16yo boy” (these were legit other arguments at the time). like he was a KID for fucks sake. who the fuck asks to go through puberty in the fucking spotlight???? fucking N O O N E thats fucking who. like obviously he’s had a myriad of meltdowns and bad publicity over the years since. but this bullshit would’ve been so fucking horrible to take during the shitty years of puberty and high school to boot. obviously, in the years since, he’s done roast battles with jokes about this, so it’s good that he was able deal with it and joke about it, albeit eventually.

but i would’ve absolutely fucking hated to have all my pubescent behaviour and changes being fucking aired and speculated on in public view, for completely random people, famous or not, to comment on and make fun of. like i’ve talked before about the trouble i had with my period in my teens. i would’ve LOATHED to have that shit aired as it happened, on a red carpet for example. or as im accepting an award or just let alone performing at a show. just mid speech or mid performance. i would’ve bled (leaked) onto an expensive costume or provided expensive designer dress (or my own clothes/outfit) because my flow for a particular month/week was uber heavy. or god forbid, i wouldve thrown up mid-press-junket-interview on air or almost fucking passed out as well, depending on how my cycle/ovaries/hormones were feeling during a particular month/week.

like this is besides my point in a sense, but still. i would’ve had this aired and speculated on if i’d been catapulted to fame at the same time as bieber (and keep in mind, he is literally only a year older than me). but my period struggles would have been spun as “are you SURE this GIRL isn’t a BOY who knows nothing about period products??? does she know ANYTHING about pads & tampons so she WON’T bleed onto her dress or the like??? what a lazy, disgusting “girl”!” or “does she KNOW just how WEAK she is for NOT controlling her period pain??? how dare she pass out mid-show??? does she know she’s FAKING IT??? what a weak person, just GET UP and PERFORM, MONKEY because PERIODS ARENT THAT BAD!!! just think like a MAN and your period pain will go away!” or some other bizarre speculative bullshit that has absolutely nothing to do with anyone else.

when unbeknownst to anyone, i would’ve had about 5 advil tablets to both deal with my utterly unbearable period pain and unfathomably blinding and mind-numbing hormonal period headache, right before the said event or interview or whatever the fuck celeb duty i was carrying out. i would’ve had heat pads on, i would have been dizzy when arriving to and leaving from sets, etc etc etc. and finally, i would’ve been incredibly tired during all of this…… because of how much my periods fucked me around as a teen, to the point that some nights i couldn’t even fucking sleep properly. or the only reprieve i would get from the pain would be the aforementioned 5 advil tablets and an all day nap. on top of all this, i probably would’ve had to BEG (all because video call interviews weren’t particularly popular back then) for some like video call interview type thing from my bedroom or home studio or whatever, just to avoid going into an actual studio & set so i could just lay in bed or sit somewhere comfortable for the whole interview. and again etc etc etc because of all the other problems i had with my periods in my teens til my early fucking 20s, that i’ve mentioned several times on/in various posts on this hellsite over the years.

and the same goes for female stars like sasha pieterse from PLL when she opened up about her struggle with PCOS, and halsey with sharing her struggle with endometriosis. i would’ve hated to go through those medical conditions in the spotlight. i feel for them. it’s also the same thing with boobs: where the most famous example in recent years is ariel winter from modern family….. with how she needed a breast reduction because her boobs were giving her back problems and stuff, because she was like an F cup or something. and she also hated the creepy ass comments she was getting from gross dudes about how nice her boobs were or whatever the fuck, even while she was still a teen on the show.

anyway. back to bieber. i only say this because literally like last year or in 2019, the bieber joke appeared in my feed again in the first time in YEARS and i ended up tagging one of my old catholic school friends like “how the fuck do people still think this is funny?? it’s so 2011. and come to think of it, it was never funny in the first place anyway”. like both the media and the public had absolutely no right to speculate this shit and invade a young teen boy’s privacy like this??? it was so fucked up. idk why i didn’t make a post about it at the time…. but it also came into my mind just now because i commented on a post about justin bieber the other night about how he’s had fans stalk him to his nyc apartment again. like when the actual fuck will people fucking learn to let celebs have their goddamned privacy lmao.