#+ one more for fuuta to even it out
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good-beans · 2 months ago
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I forgot to add my Yuno ones! And indulgent oc ones hehe
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No moar. assingmence.
Picrew.
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good-beanswrites · 4 months ago
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If you're still taking requests, could I ask for Futa finding our that Yuno was lying about getting beaten up in her first interrogation?
You sure can 👀👀👀👀 Omg, I'm a fake 02-03 fan, how have I never thought about that moment before? I assumed he'd know eventually, but for someone who's so honest (and likely already has issues with a disloyal friend group) an actual confession would be so painful... Thank you so much for the request, it reminded me how much I loved writing these two ;--;
“I can’t believe it!” Fuuta laid across Yuno’s bed, staring up at the ceiling. “I can’t fucking believe it!”
“Ooh~ is this about Shidou-san?” Yuno stepped out of a pair of shoes, grabbing another. She walked back and forth with accessories she’d requested or borrowed from the others. After scrutinizing them in the mirror, she’d try on something else. 
“Of course it is! Why aren’t you freaking out about this?”
It was a rhetorical question, she knew. This was one of those times Fuuta wasn’t really listening to anything except the rant in his own head. It could be annoying, but between him and Mahiru, Yuno actually enjoyed the chance to sit back and let someone else take over the conversation. 
“He comes out of his interrogation, casually laughing about the warden being young and kicking him, then expects us to be okay with it? That makes four out of five interrogations someone got hurt! It’s a good thing I showed them they can’t fuck with someone like me, eh? But a pushover like Shidou gets abused and laughs! Argh!” 
Fuuta sat up suddenly, trying to find somewhere to put his anger. He caught Yuno’s eye through the mirror. “There’s no way this is legal, locking us up with some violence-crazed warden! You know what I just keep thinking about, every day?”
Yuno gave a small “hm?” knowing he’d tell her anyway. She turned her eyes away, pretending to fix the ribbon in her hair. It was becoming less and less enjoyable to sit back and let him talk, this time. She was starting to see where this conversation would end. She knew what she needed to do.
“I just keep thinking, what are we going to do about Mahiru?”
“What do you mean?”
She was met with a dumbfounded look. 
“We can’t just let her go in there by herself! Haruka and Shidou have some size and strength on Es, so like a coward they only showed a bit of force. But they know you and Muu were much smaller and weaker, so they really took it out on you both. I mean, I could hear Muu crying during her interrogation, and she came out still sniffling. Whatever the hell happened, it can’t be good. Just think of what’ll happen to Mahiru if we leave her alone in there! I’ve started thinking about what we can do.”
She laughed, picking up a headband. “Fuuta, you can’t do anything. It’s not like you’d be able to break in during the interrogation. I’m sure Mahiru-san will be just fine.”
“You can’t be sure, in a place like this. I’ve been thinking about this! I was even talking to Kotoko, and we think it’s possible to sneak in beforehand.”
“And if you get caught? What if you get Mahiru-san in more trouble?”
It was all she could think to say. She knew the truth had to come out eventually, but if there was a chance she could calm Fuuta down and avoid a fight altogether, she’d take it. Yuno wasn’t afraid of him. However, just because he was all bark and no bite didn’t make his bite any easier to handle. If she was putting the pieces together correctly, it still did end up killing someone…
Instead of slowing down, his face lit up with even more intensity. He leapt to his feet, appearing behind Yuno in the mirror. “See, that’s where my backup plan comes in! We’ll get the others involved. An interrogation will be the perfect time to stage a riot because –”
“Oh, Fuuta.”
“– I mean it! How are they and that stupid rabbit going to stop all of us, huh? It’s high time we stood up to this injustice! Give that brat a taste of their own medicine –”
“Just, listen for a second.”
“– We won’t use any violence or anything! Unlike them, we’re above that. Just give them a good scare, and demand that they –”
“Fuuta.”
“What?” He sounded exasperated, but paused to let her speak. She hadn’t raised her voice; he was learning to tell when she was serious.
“There’s... something I need to tell you.” Her tone made it clear that this would be a pretty weighty confession. Annoyance flashed across his face, like is now really the time for this? 
Yuno turned to face him. She reached for his hands, knowing the wonders a bit of physical contact can do. Fuuta just rolled his eyes as he tore his hands away. She was constantly reminded that her usual tricks didn’t work on him. She also reminded herself, however, that it was a relief. She didn’t feel like holding hands now.
“I… I wasn’t honest about my interrogation. Es didn’t touch me. They were actually really calm, and we had a good conversation. They didn’t want the others to hear that and just walk all over them, so I promised to tell the story they came up with. I heard Muu talking, and she didn’t face any violence either. She was just scared.”
“You – she – what?” Fuuta sputtered on his words. His face turned a few shades redder than it already had been in his excitement.
“The lie wasn’t supposed to be a big deal, or drag out this long. Definitely not to the point of inspiring a prison riot, oh god. I felt bad that you even went after Es because of it–”
“Yeah!” His voice rose. “I stood up to them for you! I coulda gotten punished for that!”
“No, Es knew why you did it, so I’m sure they never would have –”
“You can’t be sure!” He turned to pace the cell, emotion leaking out in sudden pitches in his voice, or a hand jerking up in wild gestures. “So when were you planning on telling me? Or were you just going to lie to my face for another few months?”  She could see the gears turning in his head – all the arguments and comebacks and insults he was formulating. “And what else have you been lying to me about?” 
That’s when she noticed that the look in his eyes wasn’t one of rage. Nor was the blood in his cheeks. Though he was indeed angry, he was also dealing with the embarrassing truth of being lied to for months.
“I haven’t lied about anything else,” she assured him. She bowed her head. “And I won’t. I’m so sorry. It was supposed to be something quick that everyone forgot about. Once they had their interrogation and had their own impression of the warden, no one would think about it.”
“You expect me to believe a shitty excuse like that? Why would we all just forget?”
“Fuuta…” She smiled sadly. “Everyone did forget. You’re the only one who still talks about it. You’re the only one who’s done anything in response. I felt so guilty you’d put yourself out like that, for me, someone you barely met.” 
Yuno paused. She hadn’t meant to use any flattery to steer the conversation. She was supposed to just tell him the truth and leave it at that.
But this wasn’t flattery. She was still speaking the truth. “Everyone else did exactly what I expected, except you. You stood up for me. I don’t take that lightly, okay? I’m grateful.”
Fuuta’s eyes burned with more fury. He jabbed a pointing finger at her.
“You’re right!” 
“...eh?”
“Those bastards didn’t do a single thing! They heard a young girl got abused and they just let it happen? They tried laughing it off? How dare they!” He whirled around. “Oh, I’m gonna give them a –”
Yuno grabbed the back of his uniform “You aren’t going to do anything. If you get everyone riled up now, it’ll be for nothing, remember? But you can’t tell. I still promised Es I’d keep their secret through the first trial.”
“Tch, you don’t owe them shit.”
“If you tell, you’ll get me in trouble. Please.” She let go of him. “Can I trust you with this?”
He kept his back to her. “You didn’t before.”
“You’re right.” She wasn’t the type to waffle around with excuses.
She started putting away her things. It was almost mealtime, and she didn’t have the heart to continue, anyway. Through the mirror, she watched Fuuta hang around the doorway. His expression shifted through emotions that Yuno couldn’t quite put her finger on. All his fire was fizzling out.
“Just… you swear it won’t happen again?” 
“I swear.”
Fuuta nodded. Then, a grin. “And you swear I can tell them off after this trial ends?”
She returned the smirk. “One promise at a time, ’kay?”
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lostxmelody · 4 months ago
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haha yikes wow i havent posted any art in a while. take these unfinished wips that i will not complete while i finish up moving
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hakaieve · 2 years ago
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i respect milgram's writer so much for making fuuta such a stubborn and awful asshole. genuinely how do i do that
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astrxealis · 2 years ago
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sorry for rambling so much about milgram btw my thoughts are often a mess and i think too much about it but i am good now i think <3
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#⋯ ꒰ა milgram ໒꒱ *·˚#i finally properly get fuuta's character i think teehee. after a lot of thinking and thinking and thinking#it hurts my head a bit ngl (figuratively) bcs ejghbghjag i try to look at it at all sides and whoops i end up getting confused w#what is the truth and what are my actual beliefs/feelings/thoughts a bit! </3 but my head is clearer now (hooray!)#anyway yeah fuuta innocent. guilty -> innocent -> innocent imo!! can't say totally for sure tho w the 3rd but i think he shld be forgiven#i feel a bit ehgbah for my thoughts being so messy before (also scared someone will misunderstand me) but i think yeah i was looking#at it already in the 2nd trial perspective. how to explain. but yeah blah blah blah yeah!#i think he's a good guy at heart fr but he. yeah. and i think there's smth to do with the 'pressure' and all with that#he needs to hold himself accountable for his actions even if it may be true that yk. he isn't the only one and it's rather sad he's the#only one who got all the blame so i get why he's acting that way even though ofc it isn't okay in the end. dude needs to admit and all#and he's getting uhh better! i want to talk more oops but it's almost 2 pm holy shit. i'll probably put my coherent thoughts in my notes#instead. but yeah. tbh i'm not sure if i can really say he always felt somewhat guilty/regret ever since the start#bcs it's he may just first feared the consequences but then again he never expected it to escalate to death (tho even if the#outcome turned out to not be that bad. cyberbullying is never okay!!! bullying is never okay!!!!!) but he's the character#who puts up a front of sorts and as someone who often likes characters like that. it's possible i'm misinterpretating him but#personally that's how i see it ^___^ but dude yeah guilty first trial fr so he can be more yk to really loosen up and admit it n all#or at least. take a step closer to doing so. yeah!!! okay i think i've properly cleared my head now#i just hope no one like. misunderstands me from my many rambles WABHBJHBG#oh i actually really relate and understand fuuta actually. yeah. NOTHING AS BAD AS HIM i mean that genuinely but yeah#he's starting to accept that his actions bring heavy consequences and he's showing a lot of guilt and regret. still a tough front tho#aghhhh i really hope he gets voted innocent this time around for real. he's a good guy at heart and i do think he always knew#he was guilty. and etc etc etc i stop rambling now zzz love fuuta fr tho his character means a lot to me actually#actually idk there's still a lot to his character i feel. it's either from his perception still or yk. does he actually feel guilt?#but yeah imo he does. and i'd like to believe that too also bcs i get his character but i ofc can't still tell for sure!#blame shifting may still be a problem. he feels regretful for sure i believe but for what reason is a question still#tbh judging fuuta here is (for me) like judging me from a bit into the past so sorry if i'm really fired up about this.#i get he's just a fictional character but i really want to do this 'right' (but what is right tbh?)#in any case even with all the complications i think he's improving. sort of. and guilty is concerning for him if he YEAH. so innocent.#oops too much tags but i get it now <3 !! also btw i've never bullied/cyberbullied anyone just to be clear :] just to be clear
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ludwigoat909 · 7 months ago
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Tbh a lot of what I said is exagerated in those tags. I tend to do a lot of exaggeration in general. Most of the thing I loath him for can make him technically interesting but in overall, I still don't find him intresting enough to care.
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marchleader · 11 months ago
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“She backs off a bit. She cannot have them, it would be very bad of her to do so”
Do you not like treats, kitty…? Why are you backing off… perhaps you’d prefer this…?
*The anon spawns in a can of tuna, and tries to give it to amanecat.*
Is tuna better…? Do you not like sweet stuff like treats, little kitty…?
She shakes her head, trying to distract herself from the utterly delicious smelling scent of the tuna. No, no, no-
Poof!
Amane turns back into a human and sighs in relief as the smell gets weaker. She picks the can up as she stands up.
(A part of her wishes she Did eat it, she was still hungry now and it seemed so good when she was a cat.)
(It still looks good now.)
She throws it into the trash.
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charismaofobedience · 8 months ago
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ranking the milgram characters by how they'd hold babies if their bouquets were actual babies
MAHIRU SHIINA — 10/10 MOTHER MATERIAL
Solid and overall perfect stance. If we ignore the slightly bunched back, she's perfectly holding both the lower part of the baby and the upper part by giving legs and back/head support, protecting them and having a solid hold on the kid in a way there's no chance the baby would fall unless she's really distracted. Congrats mappi
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YUNO KASHIKI — 9/10 UM GUYS UM
Thank god this young lady has no kids! Overall Yuno's hold is very solid. She isn't giving full protection on the upper part of the body but by her hold the baby would be fully resting upon her own body in a way they'd only fall if they make some parkour to roll out of her grasp and fall into his back. Contrary to mappi she's not shielding the baby so they'll probably see amazing things like jackalope and the walls of milgram and the other prisoners.
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SHIDOU KIRISAKI — 9/10 SOLID FIRST TIME DAD HOLD
This is the baby hold of a man who just saw their children being born and is now holding them for the first time. You can see he knows the basics like holding the legs and resting their body into your arms but there's way too little protection in their back when compared to yuno who can give the baby uppies so they don't fall. Shidous isn't as much of a "hold" as much as it is a "there's a baby resting in my arms" and that's okay!
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MIKOTO KAYANO — 7/10 SILLY UNCLE
Not a parent hold as much as it is an uncle hold! They're not exactly holding the baby properly but they're probably keeping support to the kid by holding them by the legs and making them rest the upper body against his own which again quite dangerous but it's okay because this dude isn't the parent as much as he is those uncle's that would give insanely annoying toys as gifts for the children to annoy their parents
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KAZUI MUKUHARA — 4/10 KID GRASP
he's literally just grasping the kid by their back as if they're a sack of oranges this is great. Either that or the kid is just hanging to him by grasping his shirt and fighting for it's life as he holds their back against him. Bad hold but not horrible I wouldn't trust him with a child but it's okay. Almost passable grade.
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FUUTA KAJIYAMA — 2/10 POTATO SACK
This guy is holding this baby as if they're a potato sack. As if he'll just hit someone up with this baby. The baby is at least FULLY leaning into the shoulders as we can see so it means they won't immediately fall and someone can save them but the way he's grasping the baby's legs is worrisome. That's a potential trip to the hospital. Do not trust fuuta kajiyama with your babies he will turn them into gamers
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MUU KUSUNOKI — 1/10 PEEKABOO
Why are you hiding the poor baby from its parents. this kid is probably keeling over to the front and will soon fall into his head but for now they're safe because they're at least leaning upwards. This is probably some workout because holding a baby like this would be painful as shit the shoulders would be sore. Bee/10
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HARUKA SAKURAI — 0/10 HE HAD TO DO IT TO EM
We can excuse Haruka because if I was in his shoes I too would probably hold a kid by doing the i had to do it to em pose. Upside down. This kid will immediately fall into his head and get some good injuries the moment his hold on their legs slips and the baby falls. Haruka Sakurai can play with babies but both should be on the floor, do not let him pick them up.
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KOTOKO YUZURIHA — -1/10 LIFTING
Like harukas but with one hand. Somehow more dangerous because as we can see this baby is actively attempting to walk away and is therefore not only more likely to slip because of that, but because Kotoko is holding them with one hand only. this baby will fall directly into their mouth and start crying for hours on end because kotoko couldn't even give the kid both of her hands to hold them.
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AMANE MOMOSE — FLOOR/10
floor
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doctorbunny · 5 months ago
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MILGRAM Hallucination Booklet Translation pt.1 (Yamanaka and DECO*27 Interview)
Context: This interview was from a booklet handed out at the MILGRAM Hallucination live show on the 21st January 2024 (if you want a copy you can buy it here) This translation was made possible by the generosity of @maxpawb sharing images of his booklet with me This translation is mostly my own, but @maristelina helped me with some sections. Now without further ado:
Q.01 Introduce Yourself. I'm Takuya Yamanaka. I'm the creator/planner/screenwriter for MILGRAM. I'm DECO*27. I work as the music producer for MILGRAM. I like Hatsune Miku.
Q.02 What reactions from the guards have been the most surprising so far? Yamanaka: There are a lot of guards that were born overseas, aren't there? Even though it's created with rather Japanese sensibilities, overseas audiences didn't seem to mind at all. Though the countries and sensibilities are different than what I anticipated, votes have become more multifaceted, it's very interesting, isn't it? DECO: To forgive or not forgive the prisoners what do you do, whether it goes as you expected or the result turns out to be quite the opposite, its fascinating. Maybe your nationality affects the kind of criteria you use to make judgements? I've been thinking about something like that.
Q.03 Is there anything you didn't imagine would happen at the start of the trial? Yamanaka: I didn't write it with a large overseas audience in mind, because from the start I wasn't worrying about popularity at all, I simply didn't think I'd be watching over so many guards. Milgram was developed as a more underground project, but it's popularity is a good surprise, isn't it. DECO: There were more people who got into MILGRAM without already caring about my music than I imagined, it was surprising. I feel like MILGRAM has spread further beyond than what I thought it would. I'm very grateful!
Q.04 So far, what's made you the happiest? Yamanaka: Everything. As a creator it brings me great joy to see a work that existed in my mind, take shape and be enjoyed by so many people. Other than that, because I also love the characters I've birthed, seeing all the guards talking about them and sharing their thoughts, both positive and negative, has to be the best feeling. DECO: It makes me happy to see lots of people analysing the meanings I put in my songs! The theories get pretty close to the truth too, I think... the power of all the guards is really cool.
Q.05 So far, what has been the most challenging? Yamanaka: Because I have to change the script in accordance with the audience's decisions, I can't create the entire story in advance. Furthermore, as of the second trial, there aren't only individual character storylines, the prisoner's verdicts begin to emerge and they influence each other. That is to say, I can't start writing until after everyone's results are out. Willingly subjecting myself to doing something this unreasonable, is what I feel is difficult for me. But because DECO*27 is also going through the same hell, we're holding on to some semblance of sanity. DECO: The story changes in accordance to all the guards' choices, and the music has to be written to match. I think this is harder for Yamanaka-P, who writes the script, than it is for me... But though its tough, I feel its really worthwhile, It makes me really happy to be able to communicate with everyone through my songs!
Q.06 Do you have any regrets like "I wish I had done it differently back then!"? Yamanaka: I've thought it over quite carefully, but there's nothing in particular. I think everyone involved in the project is giving it their all and its a really passionate environment. DECO: Nope! I've been able to put all the things I've thought of into my songs.
Q.07 Which prisoners are the easiest to write dialogue/music for? Yamanaka: If I had to pick one, it'd be Fuuta. He's the type of person that's pretty easy to write because his brain never shuts up. Other than him, Yuno and Shidou are relatively academic kids in theory, so they're easy to write because they're very clear when it comes to what they want to convey. [TL note just because its funny, the idiom Yamanaka uses is lit. "There is barking in the inside [of Fuuta's] head] DECO: It went smoothly for all of them!
Q.08 Which prisoners are the most fun to write dialogue/music for? Yamanaka: Muu's lines were the very fun to write~. I'm fascinated by her approach to life and can't help but envy how fun it must be to behave like that. Yuno and Amane are my runners up. I enjoy writing the kinds of characters who plainly state their ideas and speak eloquently. DECO: Mahiru! From the start writing about the relationships between men and women has been what you might call my forte, its enjoyable to make. I feel like this is also why I find Yuno easy to write for.
Q.09 Which prisoners are the hardest to write dialogue/music for? Yamanaka: Overwhelmingly, Haruka's dialogue takes me the longest to write. I have to use the parts of my brain that I wouldn't normally use to figure out how to not just directly convey what he wants to say. DECO: None of them!
Q.10 What's your favourite combination of characters? Yamanaka: Amane and Shidou. They're on completely different wavelengths about everything, and the best part is that there's no getting around it. My second pick might go to Yuno and Muu. They don't get along at all so their fights are never just superficial squabbling. DECO: I always like the interactions between Es and the prisoners. I'm liking how over the course of the voice drama interrogations, Es seems to be gradually coming to understand the prisoner's humanity. Especially Es + Mahiru!
Q.11 Do you want to be friends with any of the prisoners? Yamanaka: Shidou and Kazui. I like the idea of being friends with professional people. I think that people who choose to go into something specialized, its clear they have a kind of resolve and that's charming, isn't it? DECO: Yuno! I feel like she'd be easy to talk to. She seems like she's used to friends who maintain a good distance from each other. [note: while 'good' here can mean a fair amount of distance, in Japanese relationships the concept of boundaries is also built into the idea of distance, so in English you might talk about someone who is a close friend but still has good boundaries, but in Japanese this is someone who has the 'right amount'/ちょうどいい of distance from you, so this could mean Yuno doesn't have any close friends or that Yuno is just a good friend because she isn't going to turn up to your house unexpectedly and eat all the food in your fridge]
Q.12 Do you want to date any of the prisoners? Yamanaka: I love all of my characters a lot, but, well... how should I say it... I don't think I would date any of them. [TL note: I had to shift the wording to be more natural in English but the Japanese Q is more like 'which prisoner would you want to be your boy/girlfriend?' curse english for not having an exact equivalent to koibito, so Yamanaka's answer is more like 'I think would break up with all of them' its a nominal difference but my friend said to mention it bc its funny] DECO: I'm sorry.
Q.13 What's your favourite line/phrase? Yamanaka:
[Scene from Muu's first voice drama Crying B, TL taken from MILGRAMMER]
Es: Judging from your facial features, are you what they call “half-Japanese”? [lit. haafu/Half] Muu: Yeah… I’m biracial. [lit. daburu/Double]
It would have to be that wouldn't it? I got goosebumps when I wrote it it. DECO:
"It's not my fault"
I think that single phrase was able to represent Muu's character really well, if I do say so myself.
Q.14 Are there any prisoners that you think its good they're in MILGRAM? Yamanaka: All of them. Without these 10 people, this Milgram would be a complete failure. DECO: Without these 10 people, MILGRAM wouldn't exist!
Q.15 Is there anything the guards aren't aware of yet? Yamanaka: Of course, there may be some minor details, but I don't think there are any major points missing. The mysteries have already disseminated, I feel the full picture will be clearly revealed if the theories and wild speculations, which have been shared around the world, come together. As expected. DECO: There are! I hope you look forward to the gimmicks I wanted to put in my songs that will come out in the third trial!
Q.16 Is there anything you haven't been able to do up to now, but you want to try doing after this? Yamanaka: I want to do a stageplay. Every performance would be a different story set in Milgram. If anyone reading this is involved with stage productions, please contact me. [I can't find it now but I swear a while ago Yamanaka tweeted something similar like "I'm interested in doing stage adaptations of Caligula Effect or MILGRAM, if anyone is involved with stage production please contact me" I hope he does it, a MILGRAM stage play would be awesome] DECO: Fortunately, I'm already doing everything I want to do! Writing the trial 3 songs couldn't be more fun.
Q.17 Represent "MILGRAM" in one word. Yamanaka: 『人』 "People" DECO: 『噓』 "Lies" [This one is both simple and interesting so as a preview I'll share how akka and DMYM answered] akka: 『幻』 "Illusions" DMYM: 『信』 "Faith"
Q.18 Give a brief comment about the future of "MILGRAM". Yamanaka: There have already been plot developments that I personally wish I didn't have to write. The guards have all chosen a very intense path. It's frightening. I've also been ready to obey these choices since the start of MILGRAM, so I think we all should enjoy this story that can only be told once together. DECO: I've already started writing the prisoner's songs. It's hell. Please prepare yourselves. Q.19 A message for the guards. Yamanaka: Thank you for always looking after the prisoners. Milgram is a work that involves the participation of everyone, including yourself. The thoughts you had, the actions you took, the joy, and resentment you felt towards this prison, all this became a part of Milgram too. I would like you all to please live healthily in your realities alongside Milgram. DECO: Thank you for your hard work as guards. Although MILGRAM is full of troublemakers, we would be grateful if you could continue to watch over us for a long time to come. We will do our best to meet your expectations.
[A link to part 2 will be posted here when its ready]
(Japanese transcript under the cut)
Q.01 自己紹介を。 山中拓也です。 ミルグラムでは企画・原作・脚本をしています。 DECO*27です。 MILGRAMのサウンドプロデューサーを務めています。 初音ミクが好きです。
Q.02 これまでの看守たちからの反応で驚いたことは? Yamanaka: 海外にもたくさんの看守が生まれるていったことですね。とっても日本的な感性で創っているので、海外ウケとかきにしていませんでした。やはり国が違うと感性も違うものだと思うので、より多面的な投票がされて、とても面白いですね。 DECO: 囚人が赦すor 赦さないのどっちになるか、と自分で予想していたりもしたのですが、結構それが逆の結果になっていることがあって興味深ったです。もしかして国民性で判断基準が違ってくるのかな?とか考えたりしました。
Q.03 審判開始時点では思い描いていなかったことはあるか? Yamanaka: 海外ウケ気にしたことないと書きましたが、そもそもウケ自体あまり気にしていなかったので、シンプルにこんなにたくさんの看守の方に見守っていただけるコンテンツになるとは思っていませんでした。もっと、アンダーグラウンドで展開��るつもりだったんですが、嬉しい悲鳴ですね。 DECO: 想像以上にDECO*27を知らない方にもMILGRAMを観てもらえたことに驚きました。自分の思っていた以上にMILGRAMが広がったなと感じています。ありがとうございます!
Q.04 これまでで一番嬉しかったことは? Yamanaka: 全部です。自分の脳内にしかなかった作品が、形になり、たくさんの人に楽しんでもらえること自体がクリエイターとしては大きな喜ぶです。あとはやはり僕は自分が産んだ登場人物のことが大好きなので、プラスでもマイナスでも看守の皆様が彼らについて語って、想いをぶつけてくれいることが最高に嬉しいです。 DECO: たくさんの方に自分が音楽に込めた意味考察してもらえた嬉しいです!かなり正解に近い考察もあって、看守の皆さんのパワーすごいな…と思っています。
Q.05 これまでで一番大変だったことは? Yamanaka: ユーザーの選択によって、シナリオを変更をするので、あらかじめ制作することができないということです。しかも二審からは個人のストーリーラインだけでなく、他の囚人の結果による影響も出てくる。ということは全員の結果出てからじゃないと制作できないということです。そんな無茶を勝手に自分でやりはじめて、勝手に自分で大変な思いをしています。同じ地獄をDECO27も味わっているので、なんとか正気を保っています。 DECO: 看守の皆さんの選択に応じてストーリー変化し、それに合うように音楽を書くことです。これは僕よりもシナリオを書く山中Pのほうが大変だろうな…と思いますが…大変ではありますがとてもやりがいをかんじていますし、曲を通じて皆さんとコミュニケーションが取れていることが嬉しいです!
Q.06 「今思えばやっておけばよかった!」のような後悔はあるか? Yamanaka: よくよく考えてみたんですが、特に無いです。制作に関わる全員がベストを尽くしてくれているとてもアツい現場だと思います。 DECO: ないです!思いついたことはすべて楽曲で出力できています。
Q.07 シナリオや音楽の制作がスムーズな囚人は? Yamanaka: 一人あげるとすればフータでしょうか。頭の中でわんわん言ってるので、かなり書きやすいタイプです。あとはユノや、シドウあたりの比較的理論的で偏差値高めな子たちは何が伝えたいかが明確なので書きやすいです。 DECO: みんなすんなりでした!
Q.08 シナリオや音楽の制作が一番楽しい囚人は? Yamanaka: セリフを書いていて一番楽しいのはムウですかねぇ~。こんなふうにふるまえたち人生楽しいだろうという憧れすあります。次点でユノやアマネでしょうか。思想がはっきりしてて、弁の立つタイプは書くのが楽しいです。 DECO: マヒルです!自分が元々男女間の関係性を描くのが得意ということもあって、楽しく制作しています。そういった意味ではユノも書きやすいなと感じます。
Q.09 シナリオや音楽の制作に苦労する囚人は? Yamanaka: 圧倒的にセリフを書くのに時間がかかるのはハルカです。彼が伝えたいことを、伝わらないようにする調整に普段は使わない脳を使います。 DECO: いないです!
Q.10 お気に入りの組み合わせはあるか? Yamanaka: アマネとシドウ。すべての要素が噛み合わなさすぎて、どうしようもないところが良いです。次点でユノとムウかもです。表面的なケンカにならないだけでかなり気が合わないので。 DECO: エス対囚人の絡みは須く好きです。ボイスドラマの尋問によって段々とエスが囚人の人間性を掴んでいく様が気に入っています。特にエス+マヒル!
Q.11 囚人を友達にするなら誰か? Yamanaka: シドウとカズイ。友達にいてほしい職業の人たちです。なにかのスペシャリストを選択する人たちというのは、何かしらの覚悟が決まっている人だと思うのでそれだけで魅力的ですね。 DECO: ユノです!話していて気楽そうだなと感じます。お互い良い距離感を保てる友達になれそう。
Q.12 囚人を恋人にするなら誰か? Yamanaka: 僕は登場人物のことを全員最高に愛してますが、まぁ、なんというか、全員やめとこうと思います。 DECO: ごめんなさい。
Q.13 お気に入りのセルフやフレーズは? Yamanaka: 「その顔立ち、ハーフというやつか?」「うん...…ダブル」ですね。書いてて鳥肌でした。 DECO: 「悪くないもん」 1フレーズでムウのキャラクターを上手に表現できたなと我ながら思っています。
Q.14 ミルグラムにいてくれてよかった、と思う囚人は? Yamanaka: 全員です。この10人でなければ、このミルグラムになっていないので。 DECO: MILGRAMはこの10人がいなければ成立しません!
Q.15 看守たちにまだ感づかれていないことはあるか? Yamanaka: もちろん、些末な部分はあるかと思いますが、大きいところだとないんじゃないですかねぇ。既に問題はバラまいたし、世界中に発信された考察や妄想を組み合わせたらきっちり全貌が明らかになる気がします。さすがです。 DECO: あります!第三審で僕が楽曲を通じてやりたかったギミックが出てくるので楽しみにしていてください!
Q.16 今できていないが、今後やってみたいことはあるか? Yamanaka: 舞台がやりたいです。毎公演、コンセプトの異なるミルグラムで行われる舞台。舞台制作に関わる方が、読んでおられましたら是非山中まで。 DECO: 有り難いことに、やりたいことは全部やれています!第三審の曲を書くのが楽しくてしょうがないです。
Q.17 「ミルグラム」を一文字で表せ。 Yamanaka: 『人』 DECO: 『噓』
Q.18 今後の「ミルグラム」について一言。 Yamanaka: 既に僕が個人的には書かないでいたかった展開が確定しています。看守の皆さんなかなか強烈な道筋を選びました。恐ろしい。自分もその選択に従う覚悟をしてミルグラムをスタートしているので、一度きりの物語を皆さんと一緒に楽しもうと思います。 DECO: 既に楽曲を書き始めている囚人もいます。地獄です。覚悟しててください。
Q.19 看守たちへメッセージを。 Yamanaka: いつも囚人たちのことを世話してくださってありがとうございます。ミルグラムとは、参加する皆さん自身を含めてミルグラムという作品です。この監獄に対して感じた思い、起こした行動、喜び、 憤り 、それらすべてが作品の一部になります。是非ミルグラムと共にある皆さんの現実を健やかに生きてくださいませ。 DECO: いつも看守としてのお勤めご苦労さまです。曲者ばかりのMILGRAMですが、これからも末永く見守っていただけると幸いです。期待に応えられるよう、尽力してまいります。
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ryuseiired · 10 months ago
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deep cover thoughts, or: who is kotoko's victim, really?
ok. so now that we've seen the deep cover mv, it's late but before i go to bed i want to post my biggest thought/theory on it. that being?
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this girl is the victim that kotoko is in milgram for, and the murder we see in the warehouse is a red herring.
now. one thing about the prisoners that are grouped together is that each duo appears, largely, to have a direct murder and an indirect murder in it.
haruka is seen directly killing in his mvs; yuno's murder is an abortion, something so indirect many people don't even consider it to be such. muu is clearly seen directly stabbing rei in her mvs; fuuta's victim dies indirectly due to him starting online backlash against her. whatever shidou is doing to his patients appears to be pretty direct, while mahiru's boyfriend seems to have died indirectly due to having killed himself. kazui is in the same indirect boat as mahiru with hinako's apparent suicide; meanwhile amane is shown in purge march to have directly attacked and killed her mother.
with one duo, up until now, having been an apparent exception.
we can see these groupings clearly in the first anniversary art with all the prisoners together:
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all the direct murderers are on one side of the table, and their indirect counterpart on the other. all the patterns outlined above, we can see here.
mikoto is on the direct murderers' side of the table, and this makes clear sense with what we see in MeMe's opening shots: as vague as mikoto's mvs can be sometimes, we definitely see him hit that guy with the baseball bat pretty explicitly.
and kotoko? kotoko, as his counterpart, is on the indirect side of the table. this seemed weird, because from what we knew of her murder in harrow... we see her track a guy down into a warehouse and kill him pretty directly. it seems like these two are an exception. but now, we have deep cover, and... are they really both in milgram for a direct murder?
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it seems like something bad is happening in this shot, judging by the girl's expression. what do we see right after? kotoko leaving this girl behind, walking past her. she's looking for her next target, and she doesn't have time to play around right now. only... i think it goes wrong. i think kotoko leaving this girl when she does is a mistake, and that her disregard for the girl leads to her getting hurt and dying somehow. after all... the images on the prisoner cards appear to correspond to the murder location. and kotoko's...
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kotoko's looks an awful lot more like this than it does like that warehouse.
it seems like this girl idealizes kotoko an awful lot for having saved her. maybe she tries to follow kotoko, but something happens. maybe she gets caught by whoever it is that kotoko is trying to hunt down... and maybe this time, she doesn't make it out okay.
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good-beans · 1 year ago
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So eepy...
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good-beanswrites · 1 year ago
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If it's okay with you, could you write a drabble about the hypothetical aftermath of Amane getting attacked by Kotoko?
Welp thank you pal for making me absolutely insane with this request 👍 I ran through a few hypotheticals and realized I had to shift some things around since there were so many absolutely tragic outcomes. I worked something out but damn if it didn’t make me emotional to think about how uniquely rough Amane has it. Even making sure she's in a good place at the end, this got pretty serious, so warnings for child abuse and cult references. 
(So in canon, Kotoko goes in order and attacks Fuuta, but Kazui steps in. Then she attacks Mahiru while he’s distracted with his injuries. She’s about to attack Amane, but Mikoto gets in the way (my hc that he did it on purpose survives!). By the time they reach a draw, Kazui is back, and the two of them can prevent Kotoko from any further action against Amane. Sticking to this apparent system of three attacks and one rescue, I’m just shuffling around the injuries for this story. Fuuta’s attack went unnoticed, and he’s in the same state as canon Mahiru. Mikoto steps in before Kotoko can fight Mahiru, so Mappi’s the one who get out physically unscathed. While Mikoto checks on Mahiru, recovers himself, or discovers Fuuta, Kotoko is able to attack Amane next. Kazui comes to help, but not before she leaves Amane looking like canon Fuuta.)
Mahiru could practically feel her heart shatter into a million pieces when Amane finally cried in front of her. She hadn’t shed a single tear yesterday – it was the shock, Shidou said. Mahiru was skeptical. After all, she had been shocked, too, and cried plenty.
Amane woke as she came in with breakfast. She took a moment to survey herself, bandages peeking out from beneath her pajamas and an eyepatch securely over her right eye. As calmly as one might say “good morning,” she started to cry. Mahiru might have missed it, if Amane hadn’t wiped at her good eye with her sleeve.
“Oh, sweetheart…!” Mahiru rushed over to her. “It’s okay, I’m here.” She wanted nothing more than to wrap the girl in a secure embrace, but she remembered the mass of bandages that were around her chest. Shidou had mentioned broken ribs and bruises. It took everything in her not to cry along with Amane, at the thought.
“I can get you another ice pack, if you need. Or more medicine.” Her mind spun with ways to help with pain. Many of the first aid supplies had been used to keep Fuuta from the brink of death, but surely there were extras to spare for Amane. 
The girl just shook her head. 
She muttered, “I can’t… I…I’m going to be punished, I’m going to be punished…”
“No! You’re safe now.” Mahiru placed her hands gently on Amane’s arms. “Kotoko’s not coming back. We’re all watching over you. You’re safe. She’s not going to hurt you anymore.” 
“That’s not…” Amane pulled away. Her voice stayed level, despite hiccups interrupting her. A hand reached up to her eyepatch. “It’s this. It’s all of this. It’s sinful. I took it off last night, but he must have…” She started unwrapping it. “They’re going to punish me...” 
With a careful motion, Mahiru held it in place and took Amane’s hands into her own. She’d been picking up on the signs ever since they arrived here together, and a final wave of understanding washed over her. 
“I can’t let you do that.”
Amane’s expression twisted, though words came out far more frantic than fiery. “Let me go.” 
Mahiru didn’t. “I’m sorry. Amane, you need this treatment.”
“That is not your decision to make. That is not any human’s decision to make.”
Mahiru pressed her lips together. “I know. But I can’t watch as you… I can’t sit by again while someone…” She was careful not to apply any pressure, but she could no longer fight the urge to gather Amane up in her arms. “You don’t need to be afraid of those people, anymore.”
“I’m not afraid.” Amane hiccuped. “They love me, and I love them. I need to be good for them.”
“I love you, and I don’t want to see you in pain.”
“You just pity me because I’m young.”
“Why does your age matter? You are a lovely young woman – you are my friend – and I can’t bear to see you in pain.”
The two sat in silence for a moment. Mahiru doubted she would take that as an answer; Amane had refused to call any of the others her friend. At least she didn’t argue. In fact, it seemed she was leaning into the embrace a bit more. She sighed a shaky breath into Mahiru’s uniform.
“Listen, Amane. Can you do me a favor? I’m trying to be a good girl, too. To make up for something awful, I need to make sure you’re alright. Can you help me? Can we be good together?”
A long pause followed. Amane’s voice spoke up, ever so gently.
“I suppose I can consider it.” She added quickly, “for the sake of your redemption. Of course.”
“Of course.”
#milgram#amane momose#mahiru shiina#thank you so much! i dont want to be bubbly on such a serious drabble but i want to give an enthusiastic thanks because this one really got#the gears turning!!#i started making plans as soon as i saw the ask and it took so long finding something that wouldnt result in straight up tragedy :(#if i kept to the initial timeline and said kazui didnt step in until amanes attack then both fuuta and mahiru would be close to death#and given there seems to limited supplies i think one of them would have died if shidou needed to treat three critical patients#so i moved people around to make sure everyone survived#which brought me to the main problem of amane self sabotaging her medical care#even minor injuries could have resulted in death if she got her way and removed bandages/refused treatment#but the mental strain of keeping the treatment would be just as bad as the physical pain -- shed be paranoid 24/7 of#divine punishment and repeating the mistakes that led her here.... it would hurt more to be forced like that#so i needed someone to be able to get through to her gently#but the only one who shes been able to trust just got the shit beat out of him and is in no position to talk!!!!#everyone else would just make her more upset or not know how to convince her the right way :(#still - i think mahiru could do it the best! with her own trauma from allowing loved ones to die in front of her i think shed be motivated#so. yeah.#i know amane is supposed to be talking in the plural pronoun now but i couldnt get it to work - lets just say that kicks in soon after this#tw cults#tw child abuse#drabbles
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milk-ly · 2 months ago
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Do you ever think about how Kotoko was pretty much Fuuta’s ideal self.
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They both wanted to be the same thing, a long-awaited hero, but Kotoko actually “succeeded” while Fuuta “failed.” And that’s also how we judged them in t1. The fanbase thought of Kotoko as the strong, cool vigilante who took down a bad guy, but Fuuta was viewed as a brutish coward who hid behind a screen and killed an innocent teenager.
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You could partially link that to the fact that in the end, their convictions were very different. Kotoko has supposed strong convictions but Fuuta seems to parrot things he probably heard on twitter to reinforce himself that he DOES have "strong convictions" like a hero/vigilante (like kotoko) does. Yet, his actual goal was never really Justice at all. Rather, it was all just to gain acceptance and connection. You can especially see that with how Fuuta stands firm in his ideals like he does with others but then immediately jumps to try and connect with Kotoko and impress her by parroting her words and opinions because he craves acceptance from someone whom he respects in some way.
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Fuuta: "Ahh, yeah, Norway! The famous thing they have there!" This man clearly had absolutely never heard of it before until Kotoko brought it up. And he immediately pretended like he knew what she was talking about.
Another aspect is Fuuta's insecurities about how he doesn’t measure up to his ideals of being a strong, independent and responsible man. Like his want to protect others despite his cowardice. Or like how his ideal self in bring it on is seemingly taller and more confident.
Yet, Kotoko has constant traits and connections to masculinity (here's a great post about it by purgemarchlockdown) such as being tall, possessing fighting ability, not wearing more traditionally feminine clothes, and possessing traditionally masculine traits like strength and stoicism. Even stories about werewolves were traditionally more about men. While witch hunts, which Fuuta is connected to, mainly convicted women.
There's also the fact that Fuuta craves ally ship and Kotoko seems to be more well-liked than Fuuta even though they’re both rather standoffish. In fact, you actually see Fuuta going out of his way to interact with others (in his own way) more than Kotoko is throughout t1. (I believe he's the first character to give someone else a physical gift, even if it's just a tomato. And insists on giving Shidou his spinach in return when Shidou wants to give him his natto)
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Here, Fuuta is the one who actually approached Mikoto to check on him. Fuuta cares and makes SOME effort to have a good relationship with others he's just uh. He's trying, okay.
Yet, in t1 at least, a good portion of the others generally disliked him or looked down on him in some way. Kotoko on the other hand was in pretty good terms with everyone until t2. (Aside from Mikoto, but that's because Kotoko doesn't like him, not the other way around) And considering the fact that Fuuta wants that acceptance so bad, Kotoko has that ideal.
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And side note, do you ever think about how their murders frame both Kotoko and Fuuta’s ideal self as fallen heroes tainted by blood?
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Or how these two saw each other as pretty similar at first before their true differences hit them both in the face?
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And also how Fuuta starts t1 by seeing Es (and you) as the enemy but then draws a direct parallel between him and Es (and you) in t2? But Kotoko does the exact opposite, starting out in T1 and T2 trying to team up because of your similarities, and then ends up seeing you as weak by the end?
Ohhh 03 + 10 character foils…
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a-star-that-burns-brightly · 4 months ago
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So uh. Maybe I'm just really stupid, but despite being in this fandom for a year now I for some reason was convinced that Killcheroy killing herself was like, canon, because of how widely accepted that theory is in the fandom and spoken of as if it's fact. But after looking through all of Fuuta's stuff again (voice dramas, music videos, the like,) I've come to realize that not only is Killcheroy's actual cause of death never actually confirmed, but I've also realized something else: Y'all I really do not think this girl killed herself lmao. In fact, I am very confident that she didn't kill herself, mainly due to the fact that, as we know, Milgram has a very specific motif when it comes to characters who have committed suicide or have themes of suicide in their character
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Mahiru and Kazui's victims both have a shoe off, because both of them died via suicide
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Muu is often presented with only one shoe, because she is implied to be suicidal
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Fuuta's victim also has a shoe off, because as we know she died of-- ...Huh? Oh shit. Both shoes are intact. Now I've seen people, though often briefly, point that out before What I don't see pointed out however is that Backdraft has three perfect opportunities to follow up on the shoes motif, and just doesn't.
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These are the first two I wanna talk about. Killcheroy's shoes are perfectly in view, yet both of them are still in tact. Since this whole scene is basically a creative reenactment of Killcheroy's death, wouldn't it make sense for one shoe to be off if suicide was what took her out? But at the same time, these scenes are still depicting her when she is 'alive,' so maybe it wouldn't make that much sense for a shoe to be off in this particular scene. But what about after she burns up? That's where the third scene comes in
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Even after she dies, her shoes are not there. Milgram is a series that loves including small, blink-and-you'll-miss-it details. If Killcheroy really killed herself, there's no way her shoes wouldn't be visible in these shots as Fuuta's running away, right? And this shoe motif, coupled with the fact that when looking at what we have, there's no actual evidence that Killcheroy killed herself (to my knowledge) makes me doubt this theory a lot more than I had when I originally assumed it was canon. So what do I think took Killcheroy out? Well, though we have no evidence that she killed herself, we do have evidence that Fuuta doxxed her.
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(x) Storm Pazuzu Should we destroy her?^^Just because you’re a middle school girl doesn’t mean you can act like this lmaooooo don’t go easy on her just because she’s cute  QRT Miss Magic I got permission from the store owner, it’s allowed as long as I’m only replicating it for personal use. Storm Pazuzu Yeah, yeah, thanks for the late excuses QRT Storm Pazuzu I think I’ve got all her details now. Based on her previous tweets I’ve worked out her school. The fact she lives so close is hilarious lol Judgement☨Onizuka You’re the worst offender of all
And the fact that this scene transitions
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to this one, where Fuuta is reacting to the news of Killcheroy's death, leads me to believe that this doxxing was the final bridge that caused Killcheroy's death. Now, a lot of life-threatening events can result from doxxing, for a while I was even pondering the possibility that Killcheroy was swatted and killed that way. But I think someone in Fuuta's group killed her, because the text in the MV makes it a note to specify that Killcheroy "lives close" to Fuuta and presumably the rest of his friend group since they all go to the same university and live in the same area. I can see people arguing that that would remove a bit of Fuuta's agency and responsibility from his murder, but I don't think I would agree with that. Regardless of what truly happened to Killcheroy after the doxxing, whether she was killed by someone in the group, or swatted (which I think is less likely, but is still a possibility), this presumed culprit was only able to do the things they did because Fuuta gave them the tools to. He gave them a target, Killcheroy, who he demonized and dehumanized into the role of Petulant Witch, and enough details of her location for anyone in the area to find her and enact punishment in the most direct way they can. Fuuta's story, to me anyway, isn't just about the consequences of cyberbullying and cancel culture, but also the cult-mentality of it and how others are influenced into it.
(x) Storm Pazuzu The people in charge here are shit. I could do a much better job
Fuuta did not come out of the womb cancelling people, but due to the injustice he saw around him and his desire to Do Something About It, he was influenced into this cesspool of online toxicity and cancel culture.
Now, it's his turn to influence justice. And boy, did he.
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snakes-and-fluff · 4 months ago
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Milgram drought be hitting hard... Anyway I was thinking what an anime of each prisoner's personal story might look like (assuming all isolated from each other and Milgram as a facility does not exist) ((also assume each 12 episodes long)) also assuming they're psychological dramas because. Milgram
Haruka: The main appeal is the artstyle, drawn like animated child's drawings for most of the time but a few scenes an episode is instead depicted in starkly realistic illustrations (not animated). It's told from the perspective of Haruka who keeps insisting he has a good life even as all the facts point otherwise, finally culminating in the murder late in the show, at which point the artstyle changes to be a strange mix of the previous two
Yuno: What first presents itself as a peppy slice-of-slice soon devolves into a painfully raw story of a teen girl. The winner of many awards but not that popular with most people who claim to find it too dry and boring
Fuuta: The murder happens towards the end of episode two but it isn't revealed to the audience exactly what happens until much later. Fuuta's behaviour clearly changes after that point and he keeps getting harassed by people who were previously friendly with him, but the actual flashback reveal is only in ep 8. The show leans very heavily into the "is he a bad person?" question and the fandom is known for starting debates about it in the comments of completely unrelated posts
Muu: It was a dark setup from the start but not many people expected a murder in episode 7. The anime switches POV between Muu and Rei until Rei dies, then it switches between Muu and a student counsellor (who doesn't know about the murder and is just trying to solve the bullying but the tension comes from the fact that the audience and Muu keep being worried about her potentially learning about the murder)
Shidou: The most niche of the bunch, some people weren't a fan of how medically accurate it was while others rejoiced in that fact. The whole thing is a flashback as it's established that Shidou has left the medical industry in the first episode but it is slowly revealed why and the circumstances behind his family's deaths as it goes on
Mahiru: Yuno's might have been a bit misleading at first but everyone who saw the promo material knew what was going down. Mahiru's managed to keep the dark twists under wraps, genuinely being sold as a cute love story though there were hints from the start. It's unclear when exactly the death happened because as it goes on it starts timeskipping and flashbacking without warning and it's clear that Mahiru isn't quite sure herself of what is actually happening
Kazui: Hinako is dead before the series even starts and it is actually told from the perspective of someone who works with Kazui slowly uncovering what happened out of morbid curiousity. Kazui is the very definition of unreliable narrator and nobody knows what to make of whatever information comes directly from him. Some fans don't like the way the show never seemed to decide on a single answer as to what happened while others praise it for it
Amane: The fandom is small but loud (though it is always recommended as "this one will tear your heart out"); the tale of a child embroiled in an awful home life, using a unique visual style of poppy colours and thick outlines to sharply contrast the horrible things being portrayed. The murder happens at the end of the last episode, giving the closest thing to a "happy ending" they could achieve for Amane, though it is left ambiguous what would happen to her next
Mikoto: Told in a non-chronological style, the reveal of the murder is towards the end (around episode 10) leaving the rest of the time as wrapup as Mikoto finally comes to accept the truth of the situation. There are still arguments in the fandom years after it ended if the murder was metaphorical or not
Kotoko: She's presented as a really cool vigilante at first but then it slowly unravels as she reveals more of her violent side and that her kill count is a LOT higher than previously thought. Her personality is divisive among fans but everyone can agree that the opening is a banger
DISCLAIMER: I just realised that some of these can be read as me throwing shade on the fans of a particular character; I promise 100% that isn't the case this was just a fun thought experiment!
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thetempestechoes · 7 months ago
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Actually, Es is their own person.
I see a lot of people treat Es like an audience self-insert, a complete blank slate for the audience to project their thoughts onto. But I think there's more to Es and their character than that, and I think that if you treat them as characterless, you're doing their character a massive disservice. Here's a (relatively) short post about why.
From the very beginning, Jackalope encourages Es to accept Milgram as their identity, wholly, and encourages the audience to look at Es like a blank slate. Jackalope even says in one of the Milgram timelines that the only way the audience can affect events in Milgram is through Es (how this interacts with the voices heard by the prisoners is for a different post). From the very beginning, Es is presented to the audience as a vessel for them to look at Milgram through.
But Es isn't a blank slate. Es did accept Milgram as their whole identity very early on, but it's important to remember that they are a teenager who remembers almost no personal information except for their age, who wakes up in a completely unfamiliar environment with no frame of reference for the sort of situation they've ended up in. That makes it much easier for Milgram to become Es's identity, because they have almost nothing else to latch onto. Any questioning of this causes them to be mentally barred from thinking about it further, even progressing to breakdowns when pushed (such as in Muu's first VD).
Es and Amane are remarkably similar in their perspectives in that sense. Amane justifies her actions by using the rules of the cult she's grown up in; Es is doing their utmost best to follow the rules laid out to them by Milgram. Even when Fuuta points out just how similar Es's situation is to the rest of the prisoners, Es rejects this - simply because they are the warden, and by Milgram's rules, that means they're in charge. Es and Amane's agencies are both downplayed or even outright denied by people within Milgram or the audience, mostly because of their ages, and they both resent this.
Es physically isn't allowed to doubt Milgram, and not only that, but doubting Milgram means doubting themself, because it's become their entire identity. They are the warden, that is what they do, that is their job, this is irrefutable and doubting this means doubting their very being. Even if doubting Milgram didn't push them into breakdown territory, I think it's understandable that doubting the thing that has become the core of their identity would give them an existential crisis. Whoever Es used to be is suppressed as much as possible. Milgram wants Es to be that blank slate, that audience vessel, but Es is also a person. And no-one is a complete blank slate.
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