#& i discovered a while back that there's only so much she can say abt the more consistent issues i'm having (the loneliness etc)

[graysongraysoff]

hard to explain how therapy makes me feel these days

[julzrulz]

Midoriya learns urinal etiquette

˙˚ʚ(´◡`)ɞ˚˙

╔════════════╗

NSFW WARNING 18+

╚════════════╝

LMAOOOO IVE BEEN GONE FOR 3 YEARS missed yall<33

Shessss backkkkkkkkk -sexy red

Anyway how is everyone? How’s tumblr doing? we still give af abt mha smut?

I hope y’all do bc I’m coming back to all my drafts and I had some good stuff!! this one’s kinda funnn! Lmk how we feel abt it ofc apologies for any spelling and grammar errors she’s rusty as hell

Male bodied reader!! I asked for a dick for Christmas and didn’t get one sad face emoji

Anyway, following deku to the bathroom and giving him a “hand” at the urinal oops

Rating: R (Restricted, 18 and Up permitted, sexual content)

Pairings: Sub! Deku x Dom! Masc! Reader

CW: Smut, handjob (character recieveing), lowkey piss (?) sorry not sorry, publicish, kinda pushy reader but deku likes it, pet names, no aftercare, humiliation

Notes: Gender neutral pronouns, male bodied reader, characters aged up to 3rd years 18+

You and izuku have been hooking up for quite a while now and of course his only ask from you when you guys started this whole thing was to not tell anyone. Bummer. You would love nothing more than for the entire school to see just what you do to the popular, shy, but strong third year.

The way you can make him come so undone beneath you, how much of a whimpering mess he can be. It’s quite beautiful really. He’s not so shy when he’s with you, if he was you wouldn’t have discovered just how flexible this boy was— you’re thoughts are broken when Aizawa finally shuts off that stupid hero documentary that was playing for the last hour. It supposedly was very important but you’ve been staring at a particular greenette the entire time.

He must’ve been the biggest fan of the doc Aizawa played, in fact, he was probably the only one who paid attention. You couldn’t stop watching how his feet were bouncing underneath his desk— cute, was he doing that because he was excited from the documentary? Usually you’re the only one able to get him that excited. No… he’s also hunched over and alittle squirmy? You can see how he’s grabbing at the desk too… weird what’s he thinking right now?.

Izuku’s hand shoots straight up as soon as there’s a break in Aizawa’s recap about the film we just watched. Aizawa, in the most mono tone voice “Yes Midoryia?”

Izuku quickly asks if he can use the bathroom. Oh you get it now he must’ve been holding it the entire doc to be so desperate. It’s almost—hot.

Of course izuku is still the only person who raises his hand for this kind of thing. Aizawa has made it pretty clear as third years we can just leave to go relieve ourselves.

With a sigh and reminder that he doesn’t need to hear about it, Aizawa dismisses izuku.

You don’t normally follow izuku to the bathroom, infact you never have before. But maybe all the day dreaming you were doing during the documentary has made you quite excited. And maybe there’s a little less blood in ur head. And maybe now the room is too hot and your pants are too tight. Before you know it you’re out of ur chair and in the hallway walking to the direction of the nearest bathroom.

When you walk in you can see izuku standing at one of the urinal stalls with his back towards you. After a bit of shuffling from izuku you start to hear the sound of trickling liquid on porcelain. With a slight sigh he throws his head back— obviously quite pleased with his release. Those two movements are very familiar to you… but normally caused by a very different type of release.

One quick scan of the bathroom being dead empty and you’re walking up to izuku. The back of his head hits your chest and you instinctively grab his waist and pull it towards you.

“What the-mHUH?” Izuku tenses and looks all the way up to see your face peering down at him. His face is red and he shuffles slightly obviously to try and cover himself, however with his dick in his hands and the stream of piss still steady— it’s not working out for him.

“Hey” you say with a smirk, it’s funny really he’s such a strong and talented hero but he’s so small underneath you.

“I—I I’m kinda busy y/n” he says voice quiet and wavering. He sounds unsure, confused, and very very very flustered.

“Relax would you… nothing I haven’t seen before” you’re lying, kinda, you’ve very much seen every inch of him but definitely not pissing. You can feel the humiliation radiating off of him while he squirms in ur grasp. You bury you nose in his hair, intoxicating his sent. God you love that smell, your breaths become deeper and you pull his hips so his ass backs up into you.

You hear a quiet whine escape him and you let out quite the huff. He already knows you’re as stiff as a rock, for *some* reason you always are around him. But he’s definitely confused how him being at a urinal is helping this any.

You slowly grind against his ass, there are many of layers of fabric in between you too but that doesn’t seem to faze you much.

��R-really you couldn’t wait untill later… what’s coming over y-you?” He’s a stuttering babbling mess, still shuffling in place and swapping glances between you, his dick sitting heavy in his hands and the bathroom door. He’s nervous about being so public— this is definitely a strange view, he wouldn’t be able to explain it away at all. And embarrassed is an understatement, this shy green haired boy definitely never wanted to see the day he’s watched so intensely while pissing and to make it worse he can’t seem to stop. He had to go so so bad.

He couldn’t be more humiliated while ur eyes seemed to be locked on him relieving himself. Your dick is twitching in your pants seeing how humiliated the boy is, face red and eyes wet and beaty.

His whirthing and whining comes to a screeching hault and he lets out a sharp gasp when your hand slowly warps around his.

“Y/n whyyy— p-please not now” izuku whines under his breath, eyes darting to the bathroom door. His dick is hot and firm from the strength of his stream. This you can confidently say you’ve never done before.

There’s no one there, you know there will be no one there, it’s the middle of class and around this stressful time of year people who have any sense stay in their seat.

After what seems like an eternity his stream starts to trickle to a stop. Both of your breaths are heavy and you can tell izuku is trying very hard to distract himself from your hand wrapped around his. That and the grinding you’re doing from behind.

“Okay w-we can go now” He’s quick to try to let go but you react by griping him tighter.

“-ngh” it’s hard to keep his mind off anything now with the grip you have on him. You can feel his legs get weak. With a particular hard thrust from you he stumbles forward, using both his hands to grip to the sides of the urinal to stop him from falling anymore forward. With one of your hands still tight on the hip the other starts to make teasing touches at his growing erection.

You give him a little squeeze and a drop of urine leaks out from his slit. You’re quick to use that little moisture while you slowly start to fist his length. It’s not perfect but you know it won’t be long until he leaks enough pre to replace it.

“Ugh- f-ffuck y/n” the boy whimpers hands still glued at opposite ends of the urinal. His slightly bent over position isn’t helping him any if he wants to stop, your rock hard length still grinding against his clothed ass.

“Y/n I wanna go back to class please” his voice is wavering it’s so cute he’s trying so hard to be quiet. “W-what if someon-nnghh walks in”

“Shhh izuku relax baby” you plant open mouthed kisses all over the back of his neck, your grinding not stopping for a second and neither is your pumping. The pet name makes his face red. You speed up the pace and it pulls a loud gasp from izuku.

“Ff-fughh mmhf” your pace is ruthless and the poor boy is practically shaking underneath you. The hand on his hip reaches up and pulls hard on his hair throwing his head back. His mouth is hung open pouring out all sorts of desperate noises. Your mouth finally leaves his neck and you lick a stripe up to his ear.

“Yea, you like that don’t you?” your deep raspy voice whispers in his ear in between grunts.

“Hhgff” is all izuku makes out. You give him a squeeze and he squeaks in response.

“Use your words” your breath is hot on izukus neck and it’s almost dizzying to the boy beneath you.

“Y-yes yes I like it nghh” izuku is almost drooling, your pace is ruthless, hand wet and sticky from his precum. You’re boxing him into the little stall, so big around him that no one would even notice he was here if they did walk in.

“And you wanted to go back to class… pft— you’re so easy izuku” you taunt. Izuku’s eyes close head still thrown back looking up at you. Sweat starts to form on the boys forehead. You let go of his green locs and slip ur arm underneath his UA uniform shirt.

“I bet you would’ve just let anyone come up behind you huh?” Your fingers trace up his torso until you meet his small hard nipples, pinching and playing with them between your fingers. He whines at both your comment and action. You’re special to him, you know that. There’s no way no one is as close to this boy as you are even if no body but the two of you know it.

He’s practically mewling now, desperate moans, gasps, and whines progressively getting louder filling this empty bathroom. You’re so good to him. So rough at just the right times. You’ve mastered his body and know exactly how to play within his limits.

“Y/n— nghh I- you feel so good oh god” Izuku’s head falls forward leaning against the cold bathroom tiled wall. His grip never wavering from the sides of the urinal below him fearing his knees might give out.

“You gonna cum baby? Huh? Aren’t you supposed to be in class… Tsk tsk” you can help your teasing “Aizawa is probably so confused where such a good student has been for the last 10 minutes” izuku responds with a drawn out whine… he loves when you call him that.

“I- oh oh shit y/n— nghhhh mph I’m-” with a long and loud drawn out moan Izuku’s whole body shakes and convulses.

Izuku cums and cums hard splurting all over the porcelain urinal beneath him. You’re careful to angle his dick towards it to not leave any evidence on his clothing.

His dick twitches sporadically as you continue to pump his length, god he’s cumming so much. You ring a few careful circles around his nipple before releasing it and tracing your hand back down to his hip. Pumping the last of Izuku’s cum from his abused dick you let go of him.

Izuku lets out a sharp inhale when your hand leaves him, only for it to be silenced when you bring your hand towards his mouth. He knows what that means, you’ve trained him well and he’s so good for you.

He starts to slowly lick at your hand and fingers cleaning it as good as he can.

You look down at your own length straining against your pants against Izuku’s clothed behind. With a small grind of your hips you let out a strained grunt.

“Y-y/n?” You can hear the nervousness in his voice you know what he’s thinking, are you sure more?… No, not now, you both have already been here long enough.

“Just wait until tonight” you say with a huff and a sly tone to your voice. You’re gonna ruin him for riling you up. Removing your hands and taking a step back from the smaller boy. With a swift spank on his ass you turn and walk out of the bathroom. Izuku gasps with the force of your hand and whimpers at the loss of your warmth, still coming down from his high.

A quick fix of your stiff manhood makes your raging boner less obvious as you walk back to class. Leaving a sweaty and spent izuku huffing and puffing in the urinal stall, feeling so blissed out and used.

*flush <3*

𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐧𝐨𝐰! 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐲!

( ˘ ³˘)♥

[astra-galaxie]

I DID IT!! Here’s the whole thing copy pasted from Google docs!!

The Player’s general skills and implied personality + some stuff abt them! (as far as i can gather, at least, tell me if i missed smth!)

*Note that these skills do not include case specific stuff (like the time they discovered a new species in Pacific Bay)

-Exceptionally skilled at handling the forensic kit,in S1, Jones had challenged the player to uncrack a code while he recites the alphabet from A, and the player cracked the code just before he hit the letter F. It takes about a few seconds, so that says a lot.

-The player has freaky intuition skills in general. I mean, in quite literally every case, they figure out what evidence is needed, what could count as evidence, and searches through things most would gloss over. Their partners acknowledge this a lot, more in the first cases since they just met.

-Can keep a level head even in high stress or even dangerous situations even when their partners cant, whether its during or after the cases. Jones addressed this after court quite a few times in the first season. Also, the player’s able to calm down whoever thier with or

*Add on, in S4, while facing Cappechi & Finley for the first time, he managed to intimidate Isaac on both occasions, however, the player remained composed enough to be able to file evidence against them.

-Works out. In Good Girls dont die, a case in S1, while Grace tries to convince Martha to calm down, she states that the player has already kicked down the door. Like, kick. The player probably doesnt even have any special gear on them, so either the door is weak or, the more likely theory is that the player got dem legs frfr

-Has quite the memory. Easiest case to get this info from is during S4, in the case Eyes Wide Shut, player and Isaac identify a rice makeup composition on the item, Player can easily recall that 17 cases back, which give or take a few, is about a monthish? That Madam Xiang was wearing it. Mind you, at this stage in case Eyes Wide Shut, the duo had only spoken to Madam Xiang once, and she never mentioned the makeup.

-The Bureau themselves asked for the player to join them, that in itself is already a accomplishment, since the Bureau is like, the elite of the elite in the police world.

-Their temper seems to be much milder, or at least, more controlled. Its more evident with Frank and David (S1) since the chiefs often say the player is much calmer than them, hell, David got in trouble for being too brash and got so many complaints he had to file paperwork.

-They do indeed make mistakes, one of my friends irl kept saying the player was a Mary Sue esque kind, but in S3, they were also led on by the Warren guy after he framed the Guru, and they were kidnapped by Karen in S2. If they were so called ‘Mary Sues’, they’d probably figure out a way to not get captured and be the person whos left unscathed and babied by the team.

-Maybe a similar point, but they have sharp eyes and possibly very good eyesight. In a case with Jonah as a partner in S3 during one of the Additional Investigations, the player spots a tent from afar up a mountain. Not to mention its always them who finds everything lol

-The player is good at calming down their partners or whoever is working with them tbh. Like every time one of their case partners are loosing hope, breaking down, feeling impatient or angry, the player snaps them back to their senses.

-They arent quite up to date with some stuff, or simply put, most likely arent that geeky like Jones is, or probably that interested in acting and stuff, in S4 when Isaac asks them how they have no idea who Dolly Darnell (famous actress) and a famous chess master is. Personally would love to think they’d love to listen to their friends and team talk about certain personal interests of thiers.

-Most definitely has a good physique. In S2, Roxie comments that they fit perfectly into a diving suit, which is typically quite tight, so we can assume their physical health is in good or in its prime, in S7, Ben mentions the player has great reflexes for being able to dodge a chupabara attack.

-Can handle a gun better than the average policeman could, probably. In S4, they got into a gunfight with their team against Capecchi and his men, and the team won, so probably suggests that either the rest did most of the work, or the player is good enough to aim and shoot down a whole bunch of tough ahh men.

-Has better driving skills than Jones

-The chiefs often say the player is a rolemodel of what the rest of the team members should be, often, its Frank and Jones being reprimanded and being compared to the Player.

-Implied to be a pretty sarcastic and humorous person, whenever the person their working with for a case or a suspect makes a unfunny or less than tasteful joke, or just does smth weird in general, they always tell the player to ‘not look at them like that’

*Jones seems to be the one saying this the most, including Frank because he teases the player a lot as well.

-Patient. The cheifs say the player is patient, and im sure having Frank work with them would make their temper flare at leats three times in a single hour if the player wasnt a patient person.

-Knows how to handle and drag themselves + their team out of wallowing after a crisis. In S3, Ripley praises the player for being able to rise up after her ‘death’ so quickly, and solving her ‘death’ as well.

-Thier spice tolerence is off the charts, could bet money that they definitely could eat a few hot peppers and only complain of a bit of bite on their tongue. Even Rita admits their tolerance is higher and she’s tough as hell.

-Reliable adult, probably good or decent with children. They were the adult Matilda came running to (in Grimsborough S1) while her own parents were arguing. Jones said this as well when reprimanding the dad.

-My friend (yes the same one) keeps saying that the player would be homophobic?? What?? At least one of their core team members are gay as hell, cmon bruh

-Is most definately empathic and more adept at handling sensitive cases, whether by sensitive, its a matter of whether the press gets ahold and it could be bad, or its sensitive like family and personal matters get involved. When their partners make a distasteful comment or joke, no matter how mild, the player is implied to have told them off (ahem, Jones, Frank and Roxie)

-Good at undercover work, its shows in S4 during the last district, does the S4 part where they have to break Florence Samuels out with Rose count?

-They solve cases within the day or in a few hours, the latest they’ve ever finished a case was in the evening and then again, the player had only started on it in the afternoon.

-A kind person in general. I mean, for one, if i was a homicide investigator and every time i do an investigation, multiple people want my help?? I’d bail, nuh uh. AND not to mention, its time consuming bc theres always the need for analysis, and with sometimes, personal and professional problems get mixed up halfway.

-They most definitely have the money to live comfortably, they have the money to take James Savage for shopping for a new funeral suit and outfit, and they recieve so much spare cash from suspects during the AI.

-I feel like they probably have a good fashion sense, but on that point, can we talk about their closet size?? They get so many articles of clothing, they would definitely be the kind to overdress on every occasion and still look fabulous.

-I would not be surprised if its end up being revealed that they were a reformed thief or some wild shit like that, how does a rookie officer know how to crack a lock in seconds??

-Do you guys think their banned from being the seeker whenever the office decides to play hide and seek because their so good at finding stuff? Like, the last time they were the seeker they probably caught everyone in less than 30 minutes or some shit

-In addition to that helping people shit, the player’s either just energetic in general or their ass is running on coffee and pure willpower because i CANNOT do what their doing, their partners dont even stay consistent throughout the entire AI, and sometimes, in the official investigation itself

-Player’s a positive influence on the people around them, and this prob my nth time mentioning them, but JONES AND FRANK!! Grace says at the end of S1 that the Player’s influenced them positively a lot, and Karen says that as well abt Player’s influence on Frank.

-More on the energy thing, they work overtime so often im surprised they havent asked for a raise or something (then again, the chiefs probably automatically gave them one anyways, maybe even more)

-Not afraid of them high rankers!! S4 for example, no matter how many times Commisioner Baldwin threatened them, they are not afraid, gives 0 fucks, did not gaf even tho Andrea told them to leave Jazz Town before the hurricane kills them

-Player def got a strong stomach and do not care about getting ther hands dirty, they’ve seen so many dead bodies in the most gruesome settings possible, and they dig through trash every case, they have definitely seen…stuff. Oh yeah, they’ve seen so much raunchy and sexual stuff I don’t think they’d be too fazed anymore.

-Offically, including the S4, S6 and S7 cases, they’ve solved 370 cases in their entire career, including a cold case in S5, maybe indirectly, a few more in S5 due to the Rocket Cow killer being discovered, and a few more side murders due to how many serial killers they’ve arrested, so the victims get justice.

-They get offered or are the ones paying the first round for drinks quite a lot, so I’d assume that either they dont drink at all, or they can hold their alcohol well.

-Has gained fame as both as a detective world wide and citywide, AND in Pacific Bay as a co owner of a movie and had their cases featured in another movie! I’d assume their movies are out by S3 or by S5.

-Magic hands, anything damaged can get so well repaired its like it was never broken, or the partners and the suspects are just trying to make the player not feel bad lol

-They seem to not mind… leftovers, or anything that is edible but looks or taste unappealing… I mean, if we get a burger everytime a prisoner gives up their prison slop to the player, does that imply they ate it no problemo??

Sidenote: it feels like I’m putting the player on a pedestal at some parts… I assure you I’m not trying to 🥲🥲

Sorry, it took so long for me to answer this! I FINALLY found the time to sit down, read and react to it!

And to start this off: HOLY SHIT!😲 (I mean this in the best way possible!)

(Live footage of me giving this post as much love as possible. Yes, I am secretly an alien gremlin!😉)

I'm going to try to go through each section at a time, so prepare for a long post!

-Sometimes, I wonder if anyone else has training when it comes to the forensic kit... I remember Jack claiming to be a pro at the vacuum tool, but we NEVER see him use it! Or any of our partners, for that matter!🙄

-It wouldn't surprise me if the player was psychic! Or at least partly! I don't think I've seen anyone make a psychic player OC yet, but it would be an interesting concept!

-After everything the player has seen, even just in the first season alone, it's no surprise they know how to keep their cool!

(At least Isaac got more confident at dealing with Finley! Though we can't blame him for being scared of Mad Dog!)

-Kicking down a door is no easy task! (Not that I've ever tried it.) So the player must try to keep themself in shape! And clearly, they don't skip leg day!🦾🦿

-I wish I had the player's memory sometimes... My working memory is slowly going downhill! And yeah, remembering something as minor as someone wearing rice makeup from months ago is impressive! Esapiclly considering everything that's happened between the cases!

-I have the theory that if CC had continued, we would have been recruited into the GIA or another secret spy agency like we were for the Bureau! After all, their resume would be as impressive as it is long!

-Some characters could learn from the player and their ability to control their temper... (*cough* Frank *cough*)

-I can see where your friend got the "Mary Sue" idea from. The player is constantly being praised for their work, but they still make mistakes and learn from them, like you said!

-Forget 20/20 vision; the player has the best eyes in the world! They must be the champion in Eye Spy and Hidden Object games!

-If the player ever decided to change careers, they could be a therapist! Or an anger management coach!

-With how busy the player is, it's unsurprising they don't have time to be up-to-date with some things...

As for the S4 thing, I like the idea of the player being from away and not knowing about Concordian celebrities, unlike their partners!

-In conjunction with the strength one, the player must take care of themself by eating well (ignoring all the free hamburgers they get...) and staying active!

-I think it's stated that the team worked together to defeat Capecchi and his men, but the player obviously knows how to handle a gun in order to stand their ground against them!

-Well, Jones did crash at least once that we know of, unlike the player...😉

-With how good the player is implied to be, I bet they would win employee of the month every month! Move over, Sponge Bob! We've got a new champ in town!

-Sometimes, I wish we had dialogue options just to see the jokes and witty remarks the player could make!

-The player must have the patience of a saint to put up with some of the people and things they have to deal with!

-For the amount of shit they find themself in, the player knows a thing or two about how to get out of it and drag others out with them!

-Given that Rita looked like she was on fire while eating the salsa, the player either has a steal tongue or no feeling in it to handle eating all that spice!

-I like to think the player is good with children too. After all, almost every time we meet a child in the game, they seem to love the player!

-I can't see how your friend came to the homophobic conclusion either! The player works with several LGBTQ+ teammates and interacts with even more LGBTQ+ characters outside the teams! Are we sure they played the same CC game?

-The player is one of the game's most empathetic people. Even after so much death and pain, they still are. And they know how to stay professional when working on a sensitive case.

-I'd count it as evidence of them being good at undercover work! They're also constantly undercover in S6 and manage to fool nearly everyone they meet!

-I've always wondered about the timeline for solving a case... I swear they finish every case within a shift! I think the only one I canonly recall taking more than a day was Anatomy of Murder when Jones talks about reading his book before bed during chapters 2&1 (I think...).

-The player has a heart of gold, and it's a miracle they still do by the end of the series!✨

-They must be LOADED! But if people keep giving them free money on top of their job income, it's no surprise they probably don't have to worry about money!

-With all the clothes and accessories they get throughout the series, they could have a whole floor in their house dedicated to their closet! Hopefully, they donate anything they no longer want.

-A common theme among OC players is that they always have a secret past! I'm sure someone must have made one with a past as a thief or something to help explain how they're so good at picking locks!

-Agreed. They are only allowed to participate in hide-and-go-seek by being the timekeeper.

-The player must live off of coffee, energy drinks, or SOMETHING to be so energetic! I know I wouldn't be so excited to do extra work by helping people after solving a murder! I hope they get extended vacations to make it even!

-Player, spreading positivity wherever they go!✨

-They better get paid WELL for everything they do for their job, teammates, cities and citizens!

-They've got nerves of steel and the bravery of a god to stand up against so much higher authority! They've even talked back to royalty before, too!

-For how often they search through the trash, they either have no sense of smell or the strongest stomach in the world!

-The player's case record is unbeatable! And they solved all those cases in under a decade, according to the undefined timeline!

-I think the drink thing stopped after S2 (or at least I don't remember it happening as much after that season), but they are still often invited for drinks one way or another!

-I'll never know how they weren't recognized in S7, given how famous they are! For changing to such a secret job when they joined the supernatural hunters, it's a surprise they weren't recognized! Especially considering we run into past characters!🤔

-The player is probably the first person people go to after breaking something! We'll never know how they manage to fix things so perfectly! Unless they really ARE magic!🤔

-The player never does say no to free food... Even when they really should! How they never got food poisoning (Jones flashback intensify) will remain a mystery!

-Don't worry; other characters put the player on a pedestal for us!😉

Phew! That was a workout! Hopefully, we didn't lose you guys!😅

I can tell you put a lot of work into this, so let me be the first to say good job!🥳✨

NOW TAKE A BREAK! You deserve it after creating this doc!

You captured a lot of the player's traits and successes! And I look forward to seeing what others think about your analysis! And if there's anything they think should be added! After all, it is always helpful to have some extra input!😊

[jinbeisluffy]

Me and my friend hung out for a few hours yesterday and yapped about op way too much so now i wanna contribute more sexuality hcs but for side characters instead of any specific group. you can have ur own hcs these r just mine

ace - TRANS TRANS TRANS TRANS TRANS you will believe in transmasc ace agenda. he is so trans, what are you doing walking around shirtless CONSTANTLY if not to flex your top surgery scars. he’d beat up anyone as a kid who called him a girl hes known this for a WHILE. sexuality wise hes gay, hes gay and theres not a hint of asexuality in him because hes a freak and unapologetically loves men openly. gay icon in the op world

law - i havent seen law being shipped with a woman once and i find that really funny and telling of what people think of him. and theyre correct, hes a gay man. difference between him and ace is that he’d rather die than admit he even likes people so yk. cis but he did ace’s top surgery

sabo - i have never before seen a character so very much be aromantic without being an implied aromantic character. hes not repulsed by romance its just that hes preoccupied with overthrowing the government and supporting his brothers at all times, he has other things to worry abt. gender, could be anything and could honestly fluctuate depending on the day. at the very least, he fist fights transphobes on the daily and in a modern au would hangout at iva’s drag bar and fight anyone who acts weird

yamato - if you dont think yamato is a transman i want you to get away from my blog okay thanks. that isnt a hc, thats a fact and ppl who disagree are weird in my eyes. sexuality wise, he could honestly like ANYONE, but he just finds himself drawn to men more often than not (ace) so if you were to ask him he’d just say “oh men are cool, women are pretty but you know i cant find myself drawn to them” and he thinks hes normal get a load of this guy

kaku - most proudly bisexual guy to exist. i think he started to think more to himself about things during his time at water 7. he could also be okay with it and live his life that way without any shame because he wasnt an assassin working for the government there, he was kaku so yk, he could actually openly be with whoever he wanted. gender, cis man but if you talk about him using they/them only he’d just laugh and not correct you

lucci - hah gay. him and kaku probably got married in water 7. cp9 questioned kaku for marrying lucci, meanwhile pauile just questioned to himself how things would work cause of the pigeon. lucci is such a gay man, he fucking trans too dont ask me how i know i just know. Ai can sniff out my fellow transguys from a mile away alright

kalifa - oh i love it when women hate on men but the second a woman shows up she acts all flirty and confident. totally heterosexual of you kalifa. no but shes such a man hating lesbian, she always has been and could probably be due to men’s treatment of her during childhood which made her really not like most of them. i need to write out a backstory for her damn. oh and shes trans trust me on that one

koby - sometimes a lot of op characters will be inlove with luffy and never get their feelings returned, and one of those people is koby. yeah hes gay, and asexual he just kept discovering stuff like that when training under garp cause garp is so okay with everything, and then we incorporate more moments between him and helmeppo like in the live action where they sit and talk about stuff. koby realises hes gay and sighs. “that explains a lot…”

buggy - gaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy he doesnt like women he cant bring himself to he had his first tragic yaoi relationship as a teen and never looked back. gender is whatever you want it to be baby. freaky as all hell my GOD every time im reminded of the cross guild and what they do to buggy i just know. theyre so freaky

shanks - bisexual icon but hes been hung up on the same ex (buggy) for so many years that other romances are less prioritised cause “omg what if buggy comes back:}” get over it man he aint coming back for u. trans man, look at him and his pussy yeah thats a trans dude hell yeah

Said friend i yapped with is —> @brooks-heart-sunglasses pookie 🤞

[damagedcoda6669]

how did youknow youbhad bpd? what were the main "symptoms" ?? soryif it comes off as personal or uncomfy you dont hsveto answer

(im rlly rlly rlly autistic abt bpd PREPARE 4 AN ENTIRE BIBLE ABT HOW I DISCOVERED I HAD IT)

ive exhibited symptoms of bpd my entire life (it usually starts 2 present in childhood or early adulthood, it comes from childhood abuse/neglect) i only started 2 notice something was wrong in my tweens/early teens, when malachi became my favorite person and every1 was calling me mentally ill and weird and obsessive. ive known my entire life i was neurodivergent (first started therapy at 6 or 7, diagnosed with bipolar + autism + adhd + depression + anxiety RLLY early on) but there was something else that felt wrong 2 me. at that age i didnt rlly know what 2 search 4 or who 2 talk 2, so i just went on google and searched "love disorders" and obsessive love disorder came up (which isnt even in the DSM iirc) and i posted on google plus saying i likely had that and was shot down IMMEDIATELY 4 "self diagnosing" so i didnt revisit it again until a few years later.

after my breakup in 2021 i felt like it hurt WAY MORE than was normal. i stumbled across a video abt bpd during that time period and it resonated with me way 2 much. im impulsive, i have angry outbursts, im constantly suicidal, i self harm, i have extreme mood swings, i dont know who i am and ive always just mirrored other ppl, i dissociate, i have black and white thinking, i view ppl as all good or all bad and i split, i have consistently unstable relationships, i get attached 2 ppl more than i should be, and i have a paralyzing, nauseating fear of abandonment. i have every symptom in the diagnostic criteria.

i brought up the possibility of me having bpd with my mom i think (i had no one else 2 go 2 becuz all of my friends abandoned me and my parents took away my internet access) and i was shot down again, with my mom saying the CLASSIC "(insert family member) has bpd and shes crazy. ur normal. stop pretending theres something wrong with u. if u had bpd u'd be vindictive and petty and evil. do u think ur those things?"

once i figured out how 2 get my internet access back, maryland dude forced the bpd label on2 me becuz he wanted 2 explain my "abusive" behaviors (he was abusing me but tried 2 gaslight me in2 thinking i had a victim complex and that it was the other way around) and i became uncomfortable with the label becuz he made it seem like if i had bpd then i was a bad person. i continued researching the disorder becuz it still resonated with me even though i was now insecure abt it.

i became comfortable with the label again after he abandoned me, and i brought it up with my therapist. my therapist would HEAVILY DENY that i had bpd, telling me that "if u had bpd u would be attempting suicide 4 attention" "u fit the diagnostic criteria but ur autistic so all of ur symptoms can just be attributed 2 autism srry" "ive had clients with bpd and if u were like them u wouldve had an outburst in my office and be yelling at me by now" and she would even smile at me whenever i brought up my bpd becuz she thought it was funny that i thought i had it, i think. the first time i brought it up with her she told me "its rlly irresponsible 2 self diagnose after reading liek two articles online abt some extreme disorder becuz u think ur broken. ur not broken. dont self diagnose with bpd" and i had to EXPLAIN 2 HER that i wasnt self diagnosing and that id researched it in depth 4 years actually and that she was making assumptions. horribly ableist towards ppl with cluster b disorders, this is a MASSIVE RED FLAG but i didnt switch therapists becuz i was still living with my parents at this point and i felt out of control in every aspect of my life 4 this reason, i didnt even see switching therapists as an option.

then in 2023, while i was homeless, i got evaulated by a psychiatrist. i discussed my bpd with him and finally got diagnosed. i told my therapist i was diagnosed with bpd and she said something like "well im not always gonna be able 2 catch everything" BUT I WAS TELLING U ABT MY BPD 4 MONTHS!!!!! so glad i dont have that therapist anymore but now i dont have one at all, so liek.. hrmmm >:c

im gonna end this by saying.. self diagnosis is valid!!! its so hard 2 get a bpd diagnosis becuz its so demonized and stigmatized, that even those in the mental health system r ableist towards the disorder and those who have it. diagnosis is not always an option with disorders like bpd, and thats so frustrating. its so hard 2 find help becuz every1 thinks ur crazy. but ur not crazy!!! i love all my fellow bpders, i know how agonizing and it is 2 live this tormented life. if u suspect u have bpd, the bpd community welcomes u and supports u!!! and i do 2 :3

[astro-nomaly]

I am very glad to be included in the list of people insane abt your aus. Anyways, tell me something about your graveyard shift au. It seems vast and I’ve been a little nervous to go figure out what the deal is, but everything you’ve been saying makes me very curious. How did Lloyd meet(?) ghosts. Does Red ever get mad at QuietOne over shapeshifting? How are the three of them friends AND enemies (delicious, but. how)? What’s Harumi’s whole… deal?

Also— would you like me to make some sort of sign off so you know it’s the flirty anon even when I’m not being particularly flirtatious?

Oh wow yeah so TGS is VERY complicated but I will answer to the absolute best of my ability. Yap session incoming:

How did Lloyd meet(?) ghosts? < so, this is pretty early. Lloyd is something called the Conduit (original I know) which means he's a liminal person with unfettered access to the Veil's energy - basically, he's the death avatar. he doesn't know this, though, because Misako's been keeping it secret by having him wear a vengestone/deepstone ring (i haven't decided which kind of stone to use yet) that suppresses this stuff. he also lives in a very not-liminal area. however, after getting moved to Jamanakai, he's surrounded by liminal energy. Harumi, who rlly wants him using his powers, gets him to take a job at the local graveyard. a few weeks in, he's shot while going home late at night. when he wakes up, he discovers he can suddenly see ghosts. He meets the Ninja ghosts bc he decides to go back to the graveyard to 'confront' his trauma after being shot, only to find five different ghosts Very Excited to bother him haha

Does Red ever get mad at Quiet One over shapeshifting? < hmm idrk? I haven't thought ab this one too much haha. she definitely hates Harumi post-reveal, and hates Quiet One on principle, but I don't think she has much beef with the actual shapeshifting so much as the steps taken to get there (aka murder and cannibalism sorry Harumi babe). Honestly, she's more pissed off about being lied to and manipulated than anything post-reveal, and pre-reveal she just doesn't want the fucking world to end. Also, Q is annoying. that's. that's the whole thing of their relationship pre-reveal, Q play-flirts with Red and Red finds her annoying lmao

How are the three of them friends AND enemies (delicious, but. how)? < fantastic question! so, this au was completely upended from being just Lloyd and Harumi centric with a side of Akita to full on Lloyd, Akita, and Harumi because of the anime SpyxFamily I'm not even joking. So, basically: in 'civilian' form, they all attend the same school. Lloyd meets both of them his first day, and gets super attached immediately bc they're actually Nice to him (he doesn't have friends what a loser /j). He doesn't know either's true identity. Akita gets attached to Lloyd as well bc she's been isolated for a while, and for a hot minute she and Harumi are Friend-In-Laws. Harumi is purposefully manipulating Lloyd, but eventually her love for both of them becomes real. Once ghosts start Doing Shit around town, Lloyd starts Vigilante-ing to protect Harumia and Akita, following a school-wide possession. The Quiet One is trying to kidnap him for his powers, and is the one summoning said ghosts. Red is trying to kill them both - Harumi, bc she's actively trying to end the world, and Lloyd simply bc he has the potential to (an 'eliminate the threat' situation) - to protect Harumi and Lloyd. So: Harumi knows Conduit is Lloyd, doesn't know Red is Akita. Akita doesn't know either identity. Lloyd also doesn't know either identity. It's like Miraculous but with murder and body horror

What’s Harumi’s whole… deal? < hoooo boy. so... hm. okay. Gonna do this rlly fast and simplistically so if you want some deeper info send me more asks. So: at 6, she contracts Veil Sickness (Veil-based disease that affects liminal ppl) and dies. Her parents find the Preeminent's cult and give up their own lives to resurrect her - this has not been replicated. This is the story she is told when she wakes up in a pool of blood. In reality, her and her parents were targeted as part of the cult's experiments with resurrection. She is told she is evil bc to bring her back, her parents' souls have been broken beyond repair, and cannot move on to the afterlife. They're trapped in eternal agony, tied to their decaying bodies. fun. Eventually, it comes to light that Harumi has developed the ability to shapeshift into anything she kills and eats the corpse of. She is manipulated into using her unique powerset to aid the Preeminent's escape from the Veil. She's manipulating Lloyd bc the Conduit is the only one who can power the Realm Crystal, which is the only thing that can bring the Preeminent through. She thinks the Preeminent will fix her parents if she does this. Obviously she won't, but. y'know. In the AU proper, Harumi is: Harumi the best friend, Quiet One, Jade the stray cat, Brad the eventual boyfriend (oof), and mysterious shooter. She's very very fun to me personally I love her so much and istg she gets a redemption arc. the entire fic is her redemption arc even if it doesn't look it I SWEAR

I love your asks sm anon and I would love a little sign off. Ty for having such beautiful deep asks for me <3

[thedvilsinthedetails]

Rosekiller band au microfic!!!

hey guys, I wrote the first microfic in the lil series I’m doing, you can find the original idea for it here

ik I’d said I’d wait but I’m impatient hahaha

(some of the ppl that asked to be tagged if i ever wrote it: @always-reading @blu3stars @chaoticgaywitch @1284646imjusthere @depressedtheatrekiddo @idk-what-to-put-here-123)

anyway just wrote this pretty quickly so it might have some mistakes n stuff sorry abt that I don’t do grammar or punctuation anyway here you go, enjoy:

(EDIT: link to part 2)

••• Pink lipstick stains, cigarette butts

I lie in bed, I hate my guts

A day in the dark 

A muddled afternoon, yeah

Barty pressed his cheek close to Evan as they sang into the same microphone. He could feel the buzz of the music through the vibration of the stage below him. 

Oh baby darling how I long 

To become your suicide blonde

He ran a hand through Evan’s platinum curls as he sung the line. Evan leaned into it, eyes meeting Barty’s, grinning as he sung. 

To lie beside my Romeo

Oh what a wicked way to go

Evan’s fingers moved deftly on the guitar, he lifted a hand, twirled the pick in his hand before resuming immediately, he didn’t take his eyes off Barty the entire song. 

•••

“Ah fucking hell look at the comments Bee.”

Evan was sat at the base of the sofa, scrolling through the comments on a video of their performance last night. He held the phone up to Barty on the sofa, who squinted before taking it and reading it out to the room.

“Skittlefiend57 says ‘omg Blarty and Evan! I’m so gone 4 them u guys’”

“Blarty?”

Regulus raised an eyebrow.

“We’ve been getting my name wrong all these years guys. Wow that’s a crazy thing to discover at 23.”

“Bad spelling aside, there’s way more. And it’s not all good stuff.”

Evan said and Barty looked back down at the comments. 

“Barty and Evan are queerbaiting, they act so gay but they’re not dating. It’s all clearly faked to get attention. Fucking pathetic. Why thank you peenisonapizza. Glad to see you know us personally and can therefore speak on our behalf.”

“Don’t know why they’re obsessed with accusing a band with two trans guys of queer baiting.”

Evan pinched his furrowed brow and shook his head in disbelief.

“They don’t even care about the fucking music, just us and whether we’re dating or not.”

Barty laid down on the sofa, dropping one arm around Evan and resting his chin on Evan’s shoulder.

“Hey cheer up Rosie. They care about the music. There’s a few assholes but that’s a given. If they weren’t talking about us acting gay they’d be talking about whether my tattoos are real or fake.”

“Or some conspiracy theory that Reggie’s not actually lactose intolerant.” 

Pandora chipped in.

“I’m not lactose intolerant!”

Regulus replied indignantly.

“Is that you talking or your obsession with chocolate?”

Dorcas rolled her eyes as she spoke. Regulus avoided her gaze as he mumbled out a half hearted response.

“Remus got me hooked on Tony’s chocolonely.”

While the rest of the group squabbled Evan leaned his head back against Barty’s shoulder, he pulled out his phone.

***

Evan.Rosier✔️

Hey everyone, I’ve noticed there’s a lot of speculation about me and @Barty.Grouch.JR and I wanted to say that it’s none of your business, you can think what you like but please don’t ask us or spam comment sections with theories. As always thank u so much for listening to our music, the skittles luv u x

***

Evan breathed in and passed the phone to Barty.

“You think this is good?”

Barty read it over and nodded.

“You’ve been really nice about it too.”

Evan huffed out a laugh.

“I was normal about, not my fault you would have said something like-“

“Roses are red, violets are blue, you are a cunt and I hate you @peenisonapizza.”

Barty took a small bow, flourishing his hand dramatically. Evan turned around and flicked him in the leg, which only succeeded in making him laugh. 

 “Ok I’ve posted it.”

Evan clicked post and watched as the ‘likes’ number quickly began to climb.

“Now I’m just not gonna read the comments on that post.”

Evan huffed out a laugh and Barty patted his shoulder.

“Good on you Rosie. Now who wants to watch a movie?”

Evan clambered onto the sofa next to Barty who leaned against him immediately, head resting on his shoulder.

“Rosie.”

Barty whispered.

“Yeah Bee?”

“Give me your phone. Look we both know it will bother you all evening not reading those comments if you have your phone on you. Just- out of sight out of mind, I’ll give it back to you once the movie is over but you deserve to have an evening off.”

Barty’s eyes were wide, expression genuine as he spoke. Evan hesitated then reached in his pocket for his phone.

“Don’t spam it with photos alright?”

A smirk spread on Barty’s face quickly, eyes sparkling.

“I make no promises Ev.”

Evan rolled his eyes but handed the phone over. 

The movie was something Pandora had picked, something from the late 80s, a strange mix of fantasy, reality and meta theatre that Evan actually didn’t hate.

Still he drifted to sleep at some point watching it, the stress of the day had clearly gotten to him and something about the way the top of Barty’s head made for a great pillow probably didn’t help.

Either way he woke up to the feeling of Barty shaking him.

“Come on sleeping beauty, let’s get you to a real bed. Here’s your phone back.”

Evan rubbed his eyes and got up, stumbling to his room as thanked Barty in a half asleep murmur.

He got to his room and turned on his phone, wincing at the glaring brightness, turning it down quickly. He opened his photos app, just as he’d suspected his camera roll was filled with new photos.

He began to scroll through them. There was one of his friends, all waving at the camera. A zoomed in shot of Inigo Montoya‘s face on the TV screen from a funny angle. Himself, looking dumb, sleeping with his mouth slightly open. He scrolled to the next picture and stopped. Barty with that cheeky grin of his, curled up against Evan, flipping off the camera. Eyes twinkling in that way that always made Evan feel a little warmer, a little brighter. He fell asleep again dreaming of a body pressed against his in a hug, the hum of a movie no longer playing, soft hair tickling his face and mischief painted in big brown eyes. 

For info about the position they’re sat in (it’s clear in my mind but I’m not sure how clear it is in the description), the song that they are playing and the movie they watch, look below the read more:

Position they are in before Evan gets on the sofa, red is Evan, green is Barty - yes Barty is uncomfortable, yes he would sit like that anyway bc Barty will do fucking contortion to be able to hug Evan argue with a wall

Don’t question the drawing skills, I can’t draw and did it in a moving vehicle

the song is EVOL by MARINA

the movie is the princess bride suggested by the lovely @lulublack90 who u shld defo check out bc she’s rlly amazing at writing

(Oh also Evan and Reggie are both trans in this)

[tigirl-and-co]

i wanna hear abt Break, Desire, and/or Midnight for whoever u want to talk about :3

Ohhhh MAN. I've been DYING to yap more about Orebreaker and Halite, thank you for this opportunity! I have like a full character arc planned out for them lmao

For both of them it would be losing the other, but Orebreaker would take it particularly hard. Halite would probably shut down for a while, but eventually pick himself back up.

If Halite died, Orebreaker would go ballistic in the moment but probably eventually move on (although not without becoming gruffer and more closed off)- she's no stranger to death. If he betrayed her? She'd fucking lose it. Not a goddamn thing would stand in her way. No amount of him talking her down would help. Her inner circle is small, so losing the lynchpin would basically destroy her.

Orebreaker pretty much has what she wants- her life consists of ripping mechs apart with her bare servos and then going back to base and chilling with her favourite people. She mentions how much she loves her life pretty often- about half her teammates agree with her, the other half are lowkey disgusted with how much she seems to be enjoying the fact that her people are locked in eternal war.

Halit would like to be happy for once in his goddamn life desires freedom, but at the moment he doesn't really know what he means by that. He doesn't say it out loud, because he doesn't want it getting back to Megatron that he's not content with his lot. He does sometimes bring it up with Orebreaker when they're alone. Right now, he'd settle for freedom meaning 'a day off from all this goddamn paperwork' but he's sure there's more to it- he just isn't ready to figure out what.

Orebreaker, again, is pretty happy. Her worries are few and far between. But... she does sometimes worry about Halite. Sure, he puts up a cold front and all, but she knows him. The real him. She worries that he's not happy. She worries that something could tempt him to switch sides, or that if his doubts are discovered she might be tasked with putting him down. Most mechs have never seen her anxious, but she's a pacer and a fidgeter. Once in a blue moon you can hear her walking around in her berthroom when she ought to be recharging.

Halite pretends he's not worried. But he worries often and it only worsens his mood. He worries that the war will never end- or that if it DOES, that Orebreaker won't be able to adjust to a life of peace after so much violence. He worries that his fuCKING PAPERWORK WILL BE FILED INCORRECTLY and Soundwave will have him offlined for it. He's a silent worrier. He lies there in his berth, optics staring at the blank metal ceiling, knowing that it's stupid to get worked up and yet unable to let himself recharge. And that lack of sleep just makes him crankier.

Thank you again for the ask, this was so much fun!!!!!

[mehoymalloy]

also, 26 + 28 for Silga & Untalla (could be each for both or just one abt the other, whichever you feel like)

I'm desperate for more beloved blorbo thoughts. you cursed me and now I suffer, so I must turn the blade back on you.... that sounded far more theatrical than just 'I miss them', sorry.

26. What they would do if stuck in an elevator with [insert character of your choice from the same fandom]

Congrats lucky winner! You get two headcanons for the price of one! As you know, I headcanon that Untalla is scared of deep water, but that also extends to cramped and enclosed spaces in a general sense. Add onto that that her stress response is basically 'stab the stressor til it stops being scary' and she will be climbing the walls trying to find a way out. Like they're going to have a reverse climbing the cliffside moment of Silga using her superior upper body strength to pull Untalla into a bear hug and just refusing to let go until Untalla manages to calm herself down (which she will manage to do relatively quickly, and then be so fucking embarrassed about it afterwards. Not to mention confused because if tight spaces bother her then why the hell doesn't being held tightly and restrained also?? Because it's a fucking hug, stupid, and you are platonically down bad specifically for Silga, it should not surprise you at this point that she's the exception for a lot of your rules.)

Silga, meanwhile, is like 'well shit' and goes into Get Shit Done mode, methodically tackling the problem until it's fixed if possible, periodically pausing to not-so-subtly check in on Untalla and giving her menial tasks to help keep her occupied and distracted.

28. How they feel about [insert character of your choice from the same fandom]

THEY ARE SOME FORM OF SOULMATES, YOUR HONOR.

Silga looks up to Untalla so much; she sees her as so strong and and put-together after everything she's been through, but with that said, she loves seeing Untalla's quieter, more whimsical moments of joy when discovering or trying something new, rather that be Old World knowledge or cultural exposure to other clans.

Untalla would kill without hesitation and with a straight face for Silga. Dramatic, I know, but she takes the good old "your enemy is mine" saying that the Tenakth have so seriously it's a little scary. And even knowing Silga is a grown woman who can protect herself, after everything they went through, Untalla will always have an especially alert but not stifling protective streak for Silga. She also just plain adores the girl. She's smart and capable and a little annoying and the bestest friend she's ever had (Granted she will never say any of this, and any outward sign of these feelings is so fucking subtle, she's too stoic for any emotion that isn't anger lol).

-

And because you made me think about them, I went back digging through my Google Docs to find an old WIP. You can see how old this is based on the fact that 1) I've been using Obsidian as my primary writing program for a year now (I should really transfer all this stuff over, huh...) and 2) I used "</>" as my editing brackets, which ended up being inconvenient because TTS reads them aloud.

ANYWAY, have some hurt/comfort because I MISS THEMB NOW TOO, FUCK.

~

Untalla lied in silence, hesitantly running through half-memorized movements, looking for a specific holo she had seen. Not the stylized colors and depictions of the Ten, but real people. Silga had skimmed past it earlier while looking for something else to show her, and Untalla hadn't wanted to ask her to pause. It wasn't that important. But she wanted to see.

So once Silga had fallen asleep, Untalla had carefully picked up her Focus. Untalla had her own, so the holo was likely on there somewhere, but Silga was very meticulous about organization, and Untalla had memorized the shapes that went with familiar sounds, groupings based on category.

FARO PLAGUE

OPERATION ENDURING VICTORY

PROJECT ZERO DAWN

TEN (<insert war name>)

These were only the ones Untalla knew intimately, consumed in a heavy and silent session with Silga, both sitting up late into the night, learning to understand. Sleeping fitfully only to wake up and do it all again. 

But there was a holo in the wrong place, which Silga had played in confusion only to immediately pause and move to somewhere else, 'MISC.'

When Untalla found it, she hesitated. Then she lifted her hand that extra inch upward, watching the light move as if she physically pushed a button though she felt nothing at her fingertips. And the holo played.

<WHAT WILL THE HOLO BE?>

<WHAT WILL THE MEMORY BE?>

Untalla watched until her vision grew blurry, blinked rapidly when it disturbed her, only for something warm to trickle down her temple. It was only once Untalla realized she was crying that her breathing abruptly hitched. Her chest spasmed. Fingers shook as she abruptly reached for the Focus on her ear, her first instinct to stop it from the source rather than press one of the lights projected over her head.

But she pressed the wrong thing. As her fingers fumbled for the relic, the sound suddenly changed. What was initially a tinny little voice in her ear, suddenly became loud, filling the tiny space of their shared home. Untalla couldn't even curse herself before Silga had bolted upright, whipping her head around wildly before landing on her, startled fear immediately melting into confused concern.

"I'm sorry," Untalla gritted out as she sat up as well, still fumbling with the relic at her ear. "I wanted to shut it off but I somehow made it louder and–"

Right as Untalla resolved to rip it away and shove it into Silga's hands, Silga reached out, fingers just skimming Untalla's temple before touching something on the Focus, then the sound was back to the quiet din in her ear, and she reached out with a pathetically shaky hand to pause the holo correctly.

The silence felt stifling in a way it hadn't since Aloy first gave them these relics, since they learned everything. Untalla stared at a <something about the house or wherever (like peeling strip of wood)> as she said, "There was a holo I wanted to see. I'm sorry I used your Focus, I wasn't sure how to find it on my own." When she handed Silga the Focus, she couldn't meet her eyes.

Silga took it gently, placed it back on her bedside table before turning to Untalla again. Untalla could see her facing her in her periphery, though she kept her gaze trained away.

"You're crying," Silga whispered, and damn if the softness in her voice didn't make Untalla cry more. Untalla swiped below her eyes, scrubbing her face roughly before taking a deep breath, face still hidden in her hands. When she dropped her hands and turned her gaze on Silga—on a loose thread in her shirt. Her muttered "I'm fine" wouldn't fool <phrase.>

Untalla took another deep breath, tried to say it again, more assured, but her voice broke. "Damnit," she hissed.

Silga reached out and placed a hand on her knee. "Untalla, talk to me, please."

"It's this holo… it just…reminded me of my parents. I shouldn't have watched it."

Silga was silent for a long moment, before she asked "Do you mind if I watch it?"

"Of course not, it's your Focus."

Silga turned and abruptly lied back down. Untalla watched as her hands flew through the movements, much faster than her own. Then, she hesitated. When Untalla skirted her gaze up to Silga's she found her watching her. "Do you wanna watch it with me?"

"No." Untalla winced when her voice was too loud in the stillness—too harsh.

Then, contradicting herself, she lay back down beside Silga, scooting closer until their shoulders were almost but not quite brushing. Silga tapped something that projected all the lights again, and she apparently adjusted the sound, because when <what/whoever it is> began speaking, it was a soft drone in the night, something Untalla could almost fall asleep to. 

[little-cereal-draws]

Ivan and Genya as siblings hc

The story starts when Ivan is abt ten and Genya is a baby. They lived in a village on the Ravka/Fjerda boarder in an ordinary family. Their dad and older brothers were killed defending their home in one of the skirmishes. This makes Ivan want to join the army and kill the Fjerdans who killed his family.

Ivan tries to join in on a battle in the woods one day. It’s absolute chaos and he ends up on the wrong end of a druskelle’s gun. He throws his hands out in an attempt to protect himself and the man unnaturally freezes. Ivan is able to scamper away and hide under a log but that’s how he finds out he’s a heartrender.

The news spreads through the village and people start to turn on them. Those nasty grisha are part of the reason that they keep being attacked. If they can get rid of the grisha, maybe they can live somewhat peacefully. Their mom tells Ivan to take Genya and run while she buys them time.

Ivan runs through the snowy woods until he can’t anymore. Then he walks. And walks. And walks. The night is freezing and he tucks Genya on the inside of his coat but she still cries. He knows he needs to keep moving but he doesn’t know where he’s trying to get to and it’s dark and he’s lost and he’s freezing. He slumps against a tree and curls up. He knows the stories of people freezing to death in their sleep so he keeps himself awake by trying to keep Genya’s blood moving.

In the morning, there’s a man on a horse. A grand imposing gentleman on a horse. The Black General was leading his troops through the area in response to Fjerdan attacks and grisha hunts. One of his scouts found Ivan huddled in the snow. Ivan’s heard whispers about the Black General but he’s too frozen to fight back when he’s swept up onto a horse and taken back to the Little Palace. They don’t find Genya until a healer finally convinced Ivan to take his coat off so he could get in a warm bath. It’s thanks to Ivan’s heartrending that not only did they survive but they also had minimal frostbite.

After a few days, the Black General calls Ivan to his office. He asks him about why he was in the woods in the first place. Commemorates him on his skill. Is surprised that he’s never had any formal training. Assured him that he’s safe now inside the Palace walls; no commoners could hurt him now. Ivan comes away completely enamored. This man saved his life, gave him a new safe home, and was actively fighting to make the world better for people like him. Ivan would follow this man to the ends of the earth.

Ivan starts training and quickly excels despite him also mourning his past life and trying to parent Genya (potty training, etc). Genya gets tested and is discovered as a heartrender as well. Ivan is fifteen when he starts working for the General. Trivial things like delivering messages and booking meetings but he still takes immense pride in his work. The General says that he’s going to have Genya go work for the king. Ivan’s hesitant but the General insists the two of them are meant for great things. And what’s greater than him working for the greatest grisha and her working for the greatest man? Ivan let’s her go.

Time goes on. Genya knows Ivan’s her brother but she doesn’t remember him caring for her. She starts out being indifferent to him; he’s just another face in the crowd. Then she starts to resent him for sending her to the king. If he hasn’t changed his mind, her life would be so much different. She wouldn’t be alone and hungry and hurt and scared.

By the time Alina’s story starts, Genya has managed to compress her feelings into professional contempt. She likes Fedyor well enough but can’t stand to be with Ivan for more than what is necessary to complete their respective jobs.

What happens next is dependent on if you want to follow the story of the book or the show. They have to work together and start to slowly fix their relationship. But both versions of the story end tragically. Ivan dies and Genya lives.

Also Genya is constantly cold and has terrible circulation bc of their night in the forest. Ivan would use his powers to warm her up.

[c0rpsedemon]

ok so w the death of g5 i've been having a Lot of thoughts irt how to not fuck up g6 while balancing being for the new generation of kids who haven't been immersed in g4 lore and still being able to rake in those sweet sweet brony $$, as hasbro's inability to decide between the two is one of the main contributors to g5's fuckening. and so here's my outline for my hypothetical mlp g6. honestly this is the abridged version and i might finally cave and make a youtube channel just so i can release a multi hour long video breaking this down in depth.

ok first of all we're getting rid of the recent gens' pony sexual dimorphism . which is stupid . bc they are horses . and will benefit hasbro . bc they can reuse molds . and giving them less catlike and more horselike proportions.

our setting is in equestria in the same time frame as g4 but the version we see isn't actually g4, events similar to g4 are happening but it's like how the comics and the show have diff continuities. the g6 continuity will be borrowing heavily from both. our protagonists live in canterlot, not ponyville, and thus won't be there for a lot of the shit that goes down over there in g4, but it'll still be alluded to when worlds do collide, and unlike the g4 mane 6 who are all late 20s, our g6 leads will be more relatable to kids by being in their earl to mid teens. as for our Main main character. well. she'll be a unicorn (bc that'll sell well to little girls) and for now let's call her sunrise. really her name would be like 'radiant sunrise' or 'sunrise hope' or smthing (see what i did there). now, sunrise is important bc she's the niece of sunset shimmer, a name which has acquired infamy due to her being the most accomplished student princess celestia has ever taken in, even being crowned as an alicorn princess (we'll get to it), until she was last seen having a blowout screaming match w princess celestia during one year's summer sun celebration that no one could make out the contents of, after which she ran off with a few scattered accounts of her performing strange transformation spells throughout equestria in subsequent months and then ultimately disappearing. now, ofc the ponies of equestria are going to view sunset as extremely ungrateful for throwing away what's seen as the ultimate aspiration, and while not being proven to be dangerous, it's only natural to assume they'd view someone w extreme magical strength who was last seen standing in opposition to their almighty god-queen as a threat. so our girl sunrise is a bit socially ostracized as a result. her father isn't in the picture since he discovered a fun little detail abt his wife's family tree only after sunrise was born, and her mother holds so much contempt for the damage sunset's reputation has done to her that she's very emotionally unavailable, so she's basically on her own. that said in the first couple of episodes she miraculously makes a new set of friends.

now, i don't have most of our mane group figured out yet but the rest will all be pulled from earlier gens. toola roola will be there bc mlp is shockingly low on the Artist CharacterTM and as someone who was the Art Kid most of my early life i would've ate that shit up. but more importantly, the first friend sunrise makes is ploomette, a g4 merch-exclusive whose card in the blind bags says she dreams of becoming a princess. now, i don't know where ploomette has been all this time, maybe sunrise was off at boarding school but family finances have brought her back home to public school, maybe ploomette is just new in town, maybe they've had a long history of near-misses, or maybe a million other things have happened. now, ploomette is absolutely obsessed w princesses and everyone and everything they've had contact w, and she makes no exception to this rule for allegedly evil ponies. in fact, she thinks the fact that she now knows a relative of the infamous and mystery-shrouded sunset shimmer is the coolest thing to ever happen to her and they just Have to be the bestest friends and also she has so many questions and also do you happen to have anything she's ever touched or even just sneezed on still lying around. luckily for ploomette sunset's room has remained untouched over the years and so the girls can cautiously open it back up to find out what really happened all those years ago. and as for their other friends, sunrise finally being able to come out of her shell to someone after all these years just naturally attracts other likeminded ponies who don't care abt her family history to be her friends too, and that's how our group is formed (that said i am leaning towards toola roola having been ploomette's friend for a while beforehand but the rest to join their group will be brand new).

now, let's talk abt the mystery elements real quick. children love mysteries. this is a fact. gravity falls is currently having a rennaissance and while it's mainly among now-older fans, i feel like we might get a wave of similar children's programming by companies trying to replicate its success. also, mlp is no stranger to being theorized abt (see: g4) and given the number of young fans desperate to uncover (nonexistent) hidden lore secrets while it was airing its safe to say that we could replicate that but on purpose this time w a new gen.

as for the alicorns, well, hasbro wants to sell alicorn toys and i want to make myself go insane abt the lore implications, so this is a win win. alicorns do not age and are immortal. this is kinda horrifying when you realize the princess of love has a husband who's a mortal unicorn and the princess of friendship's friends are all mortal unicorns, pegasi, and earth ponies. now, i fully plan on giving the rest of the g4 mane 6 + shining armour their horns/wings to negate this, but shh. anyways, we're changing a few things around and making amore an alicorn (since her not being one and still being a princess made no damn sense) and cadance having been born an alicorn, we're also going to move timelines around so amore's death/the crystal empire's fall came after the nightmare moon shit. anyways, lullabye for a princess has done more to characterize celestia than official media ever has and logical assumptions will naturally have to be made that being an alicorn is a deeply lonely existence, especially when your closest companion went evil, betrayed you and had to be sealed away. which is why celestia takes in promising students who she thinks have the mental fortitude to become an alicorn to try and fill that void. they usually don't display the ability to handle the responsibility or have a million other failings that are too much of a dealbreaker so there's a high turnover rate. she got so, so close with radiant hope, a pony who was so full of goodness and selflessness and clearly qualified to be princess and she could even perfectly envision what she'd actually be crowned princess of and she'd even begun to get her secondary marks*, but then amore died and hope disappeared into the night and celestia was more alone than ever, having lost both the only other of her kind and what she thought was going to be her perfect peer in one fell swoop.

*(when i was a kid i thought the g3 cutie cascade toys w the cutie marks that covered their whole legs were cool as fuck. i think more ponies should have random ass themed markings on other body parts + more variants = more toys sold. thus in this gen after a pony has their cutie mark if they encounter other defining moments which would otherwise earn a cutie mark instead their mark begins to show secondary traits and branch out. in order to be crowned a princess you have to have a certain degree of these secondary traits bc it shows prowess and experience beyond those of your average pony whose cutie mark will never morph)

now, fast forward a few centuries of the most overwhelming isolation celestia has ever known, and to her next most promising pupil, sunset shimmer. she specializes in transformation magic (make note of that) and while she doesn't have secondary marks we live in much more peaceful times now and it can just be blamed on lack of opportunity. and yes, celestia can't think of what sunset would be princess of but she's so promising it'd be a shame if her talent went to waste and surely she'd think of something eventually, and so sunset shimmer is crowned princess and it's so so so wonderful at first. but sunset is a smart pony. and as time goes on she starts to notice the way the world changes while she stays the same. and just as she's celestia's only companion, celestia is her only companion, but it's hard or even impossible for her not to want for more for someone anyone else, and when she asks celestia to teach her how to make more alicorns she refuses and when she asks celestia to do it for her she refuses as well and as sunset realizes that celestia knew this profound isolation would be her fate and condemned her to it anyways, she runs. she's always been good at transformation magic. she doesn't need celestia for this. she'll do it by herself before celestia can find out and stop her. but in all her travels across equestria, never once is she able to make an alicorn, as it is a power held only by the two sisters. we'll come back to her in a min.

back to sunrise, ploomette and co, midway through season 1 they uncover Something sunset shimmer was working on that they can't quite understand, but they know damn well that extra context is needed and celestia can provide it. hijinks surrounding trying to contact princess celestia herself ensue, and the summer sun celebration rolls around and they're all like 'wow it sure sucks we don't have that here anymore and now it's held at diff locations around equestria instead of being in canterlot every year bc of sunset' but don't think much of it. then nightmare moon's endless night comes and they're a bit confused but end up having a lighthearted sleepover episode abt it. then they see what happened in the papers and ploomette nearly has a heart attack finding out THEE princess luna is back, sunrise gets hopeful abt if ppl can forgive THEE princess luna aka nightmare moon then maybe all hope isn't lost, and the group notices a certain name in the paper, a student of princess celestia, just like sunset was, and the perfect person the lend them the information they need to understand their biggest hint irt the mystery of sunset shimmer, a unicorn named twilight sparkle.

so our mcs journey to ponyville and are miraculously able to pique twilight's interest, as a student of celestia it was hard not for her to spend hours upon hours wondering about what she was like and staring wistfully at her portrait. she was so beautiful and so wonderful how could a pony not wonder what happened. so she agrees to look into what she could and keep them posted. and so over the next couple seasons the two groups, ponyville and canterlot, will occasionally reconvene over a trace of sunset or a false flag while it seems increasingly like the number of villains who don't seem to be originally from this world is increasing.

and then she'll be there.

now, going back to what i said abt gravity falls, sunset shimmer is literally stanford pines. kind of. when she realized she couldn't create an alicorn, luck smiled upon her and she found something else. a way to jump between worlds. and so she figured, surely there's a world populated only by those w a lifespan like mine, and she knew she was good enough at transforming to fit in w the dominant species of wherever she went (this is our eqg sneak, any non-pony market hasbro could ever want to break into now just needs a coat of 'sunset turned into this once. and isn't it a cool what-if to think abt if everyone else did too?' paint and you're good to go for a spinoff line or two or twenty).

sunset is panicked to return to her original world, as she wasn't successful in her quest and is terrified of the possibility that what she's looking for doesn't exist and she's cycled through everything that does. attempts to talk to her fail as she immediately returns to dimension hopping, but now the mane 6 know to invite the canterlot group along whenever they have a villain displaced in reality, and they learn that the magic sunset uses to jump worlds got a lil bit damaged w the summer sun celebration debacle which is why randos keep slipping through, but only one is able to properly control jumps between worlds.

eventually, sunset returns After twilight becomes an alicorn, and twilight gets to speak to her. times have changed, there are more alicorns than ever before, and sunset is absolutely right abt the isolation of being an alicorn, which is why twilight needs sunset, just as badly as sunset needs her, and twilight will gladly offer the eternal companionship she needs bc she fell madly in love w her from the sight of her portrait alone. (we live in a post steven universe world lesbians in kid's cartoons are to be expected at this point). and so, sunset is finally convinced to return to equestria, and splits her time between rehabilitating her image, finding out what she's actually the princess of, kicking the asses of enemies she made in other worlds (and occasionally shapeshifting to do so to sell sunset shimmer fashion doll for practicality), getting to know this niece of hers, and being gfs w twilight.

as for princess celestia? cadence's whole existence as a naturally occurring alicorn has been jarring for her, as was luna's return to sanity. also i kinda sorta plan for the crystal empire thing to play out comics-style but w a more nuanced portrayal of the umbrums so it's not the Intrinsically Evil Race W One Good One and during the shitshow cadence would be attempting to save hope from one of the many, many severe blows she receives in that storyline and inadvertently turn her into an alicorn (or maybe it'd happen to try and incentivize sombra staying good and not self destructing bc he has a much longer lifespan and doesn't want to ever be parted from her? idk) so like. princess celestia gagged hearing twilight explain what happened there. also maybe depending on when this is one of the other members of the mane 6 got turned into an alicorn too. either way, celestia's mind is clearer than ever, and she's been reconsidering a few things, specifically a few things sunset had grievance with. or more specifically, she's high off the rush of companionship and has loosened the rules surrounding alicorns Significantly.

for the rest of the series, the gang has the various loose ends of sunset's time travel to tie up + whatever other plots get added in, and ofc, a large portion of the cast striving to be the best that they can be so that they can maybe possibly become alicorns too.

overall, the message it'd give kids would probably be the value of reaching out to others, the importance of taking time to understand others' perspectives, a feeling of being seen for all the rlly lonely kids out there, and a reassurance that you are not alone and there's someone, plenty of people, actually, there for you out there who you just haven't had the chance to meet yet

and the message it'd give bronies is sunset shimmer isn't going to fuck you she BELONGS with twilight sparkle

[abiiors]

okay so while we’re on the topic… i’m a newer fan of the boys, i actually got tickets to one of their concerts back in october when they were touring in america from my aunt even though i had never really been a fan of them (her heart was in the right place 😭😭 bc i do listen to a lot of music that’s like in their sphere ig?? and i’ve been to festivals that they’ve performed at so i can see why she would’ve thought to get me those tickets, i just never really listened to their music before) but i went to the show regardless bc hello free concert tickets?? would have been a sin to let them go to waste tbh and oh my god am i so glad i did, it was actually one of the best shows i’ve ever been too!! especially considering i only really knew their popular songs?? like robbers, somebody else, aaaand it’s not living if it’s not with you

ANYWAYS that being said, since i had never really followed them before i always pretty much ignored anything i saw about them on twitter and stuff, mainly the negative things said abt matty bc not my faves, not my business?? but i gotta ask someone who’s been a fan of them for a lot longer than i have, what iiiis the deal with all the “matty healy racist” “matty healy homophobic” “matty healy [insert smth hateful here]” rhetoric??? bc from what i’ve seen of him after getting to know more abt the band he doesn’t appear that way at all?? like were there things he said that were taken out of context??? what’s up with the nazi accusations??? also homophobic??? is twt not aware of what he did in malaysia?? also straight men that are homophobic would never have the kind of close male friendships that the band have with one another… it seems like he’s twitter’s scapegoat tbh but idk i’m simply so confused and anything i find online trying to explain it all seems very biased based off the language they use so if you can/would like to… pls help 😭

okay first of all, welcome to the fandom!! i'm so glad you're here and i'm so glad you got to see them live!! they genuinely are so so incredible <33

now onto the questions!

i won't say matty's a saint. he's definitely done things in the past that are disappointing (to me at least, as well as to many others on here). last year he went on a podcast called the adam friedland show where many tasteless jokes were made about japanese people, the porn website ghetto gaggers, ice spice as well as countless other tastelss things were said.

now i really really want to clarify that matty never made those jokes but he did laugh along to them which is also a shitty fucking thing to do. he's since said that he was advised not to go on the podcast by people close to him and he still did it. however, he's also publicly apologised to ice spice and she's also said that the 1975 are one of her fav artists.

in may of 2023 he started allegedly dating taylor swift (i still don't believe it, i still think they either just made music or they just fucked or both) which exposed him to a whole new level of fame that was unprecedented. and the swifties are... rabid, to say the least. they made fun of his appearance, his past addiction issues, hoped he would have a relapse and die, all sorts of horrendous stuff. they discovered the podcast which was pretty fresh at the time and the whole thing spiralled into him being labelled a racist, homophobe, transphobe, pedophile, nazi, you name it, he was being called it.

however literally NONE of it was backed by evidence (but i don't expect people whose sole source of information is twt to realise that)

they have clearly never learned what a nazi is. i'm not even going to try to debunk that here because i feel like it would be insulting to your intelligence

he's not homophobic or transphobic, he's literally an ally to the point of being a fruity lil shit. he's been banned from 2 countries (dubai and malaysia) for openly supporting queer rights. they were also briefly jailed in malaysia for the stunt they pulled and had a lawsuit filed against them. he's even won ally of the year at the diva awards in 2019

literally every single fan who's ever met him has had nothing but amazing things to say about him. he's been incredibly kind and sweet to people

the band has always been openly political and vocal about their beliefs

you're absolutely right about him being the twitter scapegoat because unfortunately that's exactly what it is </3

i hope that clears things up tho, i'm sorry this is so long!!

[7thwish]

can't be ASSED to do banners atm but uh. i wanna talk abt kairi's relationship with riku, or really, the lack thereof.

because through my Many playthroughs of kh games, kairi and riku always have the strongest relationship with sora, and virtually no bond with each other, save for kh1, but i cant speak much for kairi's thoughts about riku for the most part, but kairi is the one to suggest that she and sora take the raft, just them, and prior to that, she tells sora that she thinks riku's changed, as though she doesn't like that.

and i honestly think it boils down to the fact that kairi has more of an emotional attachment to sora, but she couldn't have sora in her life without riku. she accepted that the two of them were a package deal, and while she makes no real effort to drive any wedge between them, it's very clear that riku is not her friend, he is sora's. riku and kairi are only connected by virtue of their connection to sora. at least, that's how it starts.

because really, i think it boils down to kairi having struggled with her self-determination for her entire life. kairi has never had the chance to be kairi, whoever that may be. she's always the object of someone's affections, the carrot dangled on the stick, the princess, the ideal, the daughter, the light. and none of those are who kairi really is, but even she doesn't know by this point.

the only people who didn't expect anything of her were sora and riku, but kairi didn't know what to be. the version of herself she presented to sora changed as they grew, and by virtue of that, so did how she perceived riku. from the start, we don't see kairi show a lot of care or concern for riku the way she does sora, but again, she doesn't have a lot of screentime in which to do so in kh1, she's a prop for sora and riku's opposition. she is the thing they are fighting for and over, until she is no longer relevant. in kh1, kairi was presented as the damsel in distress, needing sora to come rescue her, and then she's the girl back home, who sora promises to return to. even riku tells sora to take care of her, but that speaks more to riku's feelings about kairi than it does to kairi's feelings about riku.

even in kh2, when her memories of sora are gone, kairi doesn't seem to spare much concern for riku, and while i don't think she holds any disdain for him concerning the events of kh1, it once again reinforces that riku is not kairi's friend, not from her point of view. in kh2 she seems to understand even further that she cannot have sora without sora having riku. and from what little we see of riku and kairi interacting, riku seems to care a great deal more for kairi than she does for him. & i'm not saying kairi hates riku, she doesn't. but the problem with her relationship with riku is that it's entirely reliant on her ability to define herself as a person and by what she wants, which she's mostly unable to do before the end of kh2.

by 2.8/fragmentary passage, we can see that kairi has truly grown to care about riku as a person, as by this time, she hasn't been able to spend much time with sora, and she's likely seen more of riku than she has of sora lately, which i think opens up the chance for them to actually be friends. it's only by kh3 that i believe kairi could truly, honestly say that both sora and riku are her friends, because it's only by kh3 that kairi has started to discover who kairi actually is, and even then, the narrative ( and the subpar writing ) are determined to reduce her to the princess and the love interest.

by the end of kh3, i think it's safe to say that kairi's bond with riku is just as strong as her bond with sora, even if they're different. riku is to kairi, at this point, a close friend, someone she would easily trust with her life. she cares for him deeply, and as we see, riku is deeply saddened when xehanort shatters her heart, though again, it's not and never will be quite like her bond with sora.

but the overall reason that kairi and riku are not friends from the start entirely lies with kairi. she's insecure with herself, struggling to know who she really is and weighing everyone's expectations of her with who she actually is as a person and i think, to some degree, riku and kairi can understand that aspect of themselves and see it reflected in the other. i think kairi and riku have the potential to understand each other in a way sora can't.

post melody of memory, i think kairi feels more secure in who she is and her relationship with riku is more familial, he's someone very dear to her, someone she cannot imagine her life without, just as sora is. she's more comfortable around him, she feels closer and more connected to him, and they lean on each other more, i think.

there's a parallel to be drawn about kairi's feelings towards riku and the evolution of their relationship to kairi's feelings about herself and how they change overtime. she was never sure where she stood with riku early on because kairi was unsure of where she stood with herself, who or what she was supposed to be. and although she and riku may not have always been friends, kairi intends to make sure they stay friends.

[safety-writes-noms]

New OCs! Interesting OCs! Mayhaps do you have anything to say about them to feed us lore goblins?

I do have some things to say abt them!!

Earth and the solar system that Jane comes from (humans, what we live on, etc) is labeled as illegal to interfere with by other species since it’s such a young system. Other planets, systems, etc stay clear since they don’t want the space feds on them for potentially screwing up this baby solar system.

Especially earth, since that’s the only planet that has life. To them it’s not called earth, it’s Planet-1448DRX. Unfortunately, humans have been discovered to be highly intelligent, curious, and poachers have managed to worm through the restrictions and steal a few. And since there are so few ever seen as well as how tightly earth is guarded, they’re highly sought after by the rich and the black markets.

They’re worth a whole lot more than a pretty penny, basically. Orion is one of these poachers, having little to his name and absolutely desperate to get his hands on money. He hates having to do this as a job, but since he lives on a planet torn by war and conflict, he doesn’t have much of a choice.

He’s given Jane at an extraction point, but his empathy wins over his need and he decides not to hand her over since he finds out she’s actually sentient, and also not just some animal like previously thought. Plus the scans say she’s not fully grown and he’s definitely not about to traffic a child. He may be a poacher but despite it all he’s not entirely heartless.

but it’s not like he can communicate that he’s trying to help Jane since there are no translators that accurately parse human phonemes. There are few but they’re terribly faulty and sold at stupidly high prices. He doesn’t even know her name for the better part of their first months together and it takes him a while to figure it out. Since he’s defected from the poachers and also stolen severely important merchandise, he’s being hunted down and has to find a way back to earth without dying from the space feds or poachers.

[maedaeme]

OUGH ALRIGHT magni backstory ramble time under the cut. was putting this off just in case i wanted to make changes but now i'm committed.

and later im not going to be able to stop myself from rambling abt his companion connections at length so i'm dropping this here as the starting point to keep me CONSISTENT.

refers to mild act 2 spoilers because I need to be a little bit unhinged about things. currently in act 3, but i'm saving that for later because there is so much happening. anyway

bullet point backstory bc it's 11 pm. what up.

used to be a priest(ess) of lolth. raised among devout lolth-sworn, which of course gives him baggage he doesn't even realize exists until like halfway through the game.

'i had a normal childhood' - guy who very much did not have a normal childhood. am i projecting my religious trauma here. who can say

very committed. basically used serving lolth as an elaborate excuse to get away with whatever selfish whims popped into his head

worked alongside two other, equally terrible priestesses under the mutual understanding that they were only 'allies' until they could stab each other in the back

last one standing is loth's fav. you know how it is

did in fact get stabbed in the back when one of them uncovered a secret of his and used it to oust him

fully accepted he was going to get sacrificed to lolth. was pretty chill with it, actually. as far as he was concerned it only made sense.

the priestess who ousted him decided it would be meaner to banish him to the surface instead

she was correct.

became SO INCENSED at being told he was not a worthy sacrifice that it became ALL he cared about

like. he refused to wrap his brain around it, so he just went 'fine, i will claw my way up from the dirt and eat bugs or whatever and i WILL become so fucking impressive that when i come back DOWN here you will HAVE to sacrifice me. that's how good i'll be.

'also maybe i'll trans my gender while i'm at it bc at this point I Have Nothing To Lose'

lost ability to use magic in the middle of this and just refused to think about the 'god abandoned me' implications

knew nothing about the surface. broke into places, stole, and murdered to survive. discovered life was easier if you got good at lying, just in case you got caught stealing. and he was already Very good at lying.

once he got it all figured out, he fell into organized crime VERY easily, while still secretly holding onto his General Disdain for everyone around him. this was not hard to do. people are shitty to you when you're a drow.

spent a couple decades fighting, stealing, and occasionally murdering if you paid him or annoyed him enough. mentally tucks away all of the crimes he does as 'for lolth' even though he's lowkey aware that's not how that works. there's a bunch of complicated stuff going on in his brain up there and he is avoiding all of it.

basically he starts the game an expert manipulator who FULLY expects to just eventually murder these people he keeps picking up because it Has to be that way, except thru act 1 he. doesn't. and then he starts to get used to them. enough that at camp he starts to drop his Eternal Performance, which everyone initially writes off as 'magni being weirdly dismissive and blunt for some reason' until late act 1 when they realize 'oh wait. that's what he's REALLY LIKE. he was LYING.'

his feelings towards the companions and himself and his goals get incredibly complicated. sometimes he sucks. sometimes he doesn't. gale makes him ask himself questions he does not want to know the answer to, but he can't just let it GO now that he's asking them. the people around him are trusting him with their deepest secrets and desires and it is FREAKING HIM OUT because he doesn't know how to do anything with secrets except destroy. so he drops the act further thru act 2. except they're still doing it. because they know what he's like by now. and they know that sometimes! he refrains from doing the mean selfish thing! because they wouldn't like it! and he hates that he feels that way and is occasionally halfheartedly mean and petty later like it's going to make the uncomfortable taste in his mouth go away but he is forming attachments to these people and there is NOTHING he can do about that

anyway. i'm going to shake my laptop later re: gale being asked to Explode by his god and how it forces magni to look literally his Only Driving Goal For Decades (getting eaten by spiders) in the face and ask himself if that's really what he wanted, but i'm in full hyperfixation mode. also he just rly loves astarion. he can't say that word though. feels wrong in his mouth

it's also put him in the weird act 3 spot of being the person who has already ASKED himself the hard questions that everyone else is now asking. he is, for the first time ever, somewhat the reasonable one. which means he's gotta accept he thinks differently about things than he used to. which he doesn't like. but he's embraced the softness, he just doesn't want you to mention it.

and sometimes he just goes and stands in a cold lake at 1 am so he doesn't have to think about anything. you know how it goes

[schizosupport]

Hi!! I dont know where else to go but im suspecting i may be on the schizo spectrum? Or at least just wondering way too hard. And i have no where to look into more trustworthy specifics besides brief nformation about the common disorders (that i dont really think i fit into at all btw but then again im undiagnosed with everything so im forced to rawdog it and come to conclusions on my own) and no where to find information about specific symptoms that can be overlooked as "normal behavior"

I have psychosis and its been like this since 2018, slowly growing, getting more intense i guess especially during a traumatic event that happened a few years ago *really* increased my delusions. Thats the only primary thing i experience i believe, but now looking back i am unsure if i experience some level of hallucinations as well like thinking im seeing flies n such fly around me trying to bother me or bugs crawling near me in the corner of my eye. Though it may be because im sleepy or something as i like to stay up a lot! And maybe because ive dealt with annoying flies one too many times that im just paranoid abt dealing w them now.

this thought has been on my mind for a while (mainly speaking in terms of hallucinations) but recently i saw a post on twitter about someone asking if other people "have intense fear of monsters or the dark" before going into deph about how her brain is constantly afraid of her life will turn into a horror movie. Like "what if a zombie breaks into my house" and her brain imagining scary scenarios that genuinely terrify her when she does anything. And reading that sounds very familar to something ive experienced even to this day, esp if im alone at night or alone n looking into another room thats dimly lit.

I really do understand her fear of closing her eyes n seeing scary scenarios. Ive noticed ive weirdly been seeing stuff too, mainly faces and eyes that i would see when watching analog horror and it *really* terrifies me and makes me think that ive somehow spawned it in real life (esp if i think about it too much)

Sorry if this is too long. I normally do this when im rly stumped abt whatever brain thing i got n no google search can help me. I guess im just lookimg for some insight. Thanks! <3

"Also forgot to clarify that the person is recently discovering/coming to terms with that shes schizospec too so thats why upon reading that im pretty much going "....huh!" Bec this implies this may not be normal (i mean of course not but. Never really bothered to say or think anything about it until now)"

Hi there anon! I'm glad you're reaching out, and I hope I can help you a little on your way!

What you're describing, intense fear of hypothetical scenarios and "closed eye hallucinations" are both things that I can definitely relate to as constants in my life. I don't have enough information from just this ask to say whether your experiences are full blown delusional/psychotic, but regardless, it sounds like it's taking a toll on you, and have been getting worse. It's common for this type of experience to worsen with stress, so it's no wonder it worsened when you were going through something traumatic.

When I first talked to a psychiatrist about some of my beliefs, they wrote something that I later found kind of interesting, that some of my beliefs were like those of a scared child. As if I had never quite learned how to regulate that type of fear and my imagination would get the better of me. I don't know if your experience is anything like that, but from the way you described it, I thought that might be relatable to you.

The line between fear, anxiety and psychosis can be hard to define. One thing I've learned is that most people with "pure anxiety" are not having anxiety about bizarre or paranoid things, but about more mundane matters that have been blown out of proportion. But obviously there's variability. But I remember when I met my partner of now... 9 years ...? I wasn't diagnosed with anything yet, and we were both like "yeah I have anxiety" and thought we knew what the other meant by that. And then they were confused when I was like "yeah I'm anxious that the spirit of the lamp will steal my soul, and that people are putting poisoned coins in public spaces". But like the anxiety was similar, it's just that the things I was anxious about were odd, I guess.

Anyways, I'm rambling, sorry!

About the images you get when you close your eyes, that is most often described as a type of intrusive thought, and I've also heard people call them "closed eye hallucinations". I get icky and scary images like this sometimes, and it can be really distressing.

I hope your symptoms don't get worse, and I hope you can feel at ease knowing that no matter the exact cause or name, you are definitely not alone with having these experiences, and they are common experiences for people on the schizospec and people with some other related difficulties.

And if you find that you relate to the schizospec experience, there's space enough for everyone, and you are welcome here. Even if you don't fit any specific disorders or you conclude that your symptoms are "sub-clinical" or more related to something else, I believe in an open door policy and I think anyone with this type of experience can benefit from spending time in/with the community, and can bring unique insights to the table themselves.

I don't know if I'm making any sense, I'm super tired today, but yeah that's my two cents I guess ^^

Edit: It might give you some insight to look into other symptoms associated with the schizo-spec, like negative symptoms, cognitive symptoms and ipseity disturbances :) I think that will give you a stronger idea of whether you are likely to relate to most of us 🌼