scooteriaferrari

[scooteriaferrari]

I think one of the reasons I love The Phantom of the Opera so much (let’s specifically point this at Leroux and ALW), is that it fulfills the Gothic ideal of “pure innocent young woman meets and is influenced by dark, mysterious stranger,” but SHE IS NOT RUINED BY HIM. it’s so incredibly important to me, because Christine emerges intact. Christine is the strength and compassion and heart of the whole thing, dressed up like the fragile ingenue. the fear and manipulation she endures does not warp her heart or undermine her resolution. most of the time, those arcs consume the heroine in some way, but not Christine. she may shed some of her innocence, but she serves as the salvation of the story through her forgiveness and her sympathetic heart, and it’s so valuable that she exists.

[scooteriaferrari]

I’m sure there’s an official version of Fiyero’s last letter somewhere in all the merch content that Universal has spat out over the years, but the version in my head is so much funnier to me than whatever it could possibly be:

Fae -

The Good News: I survived being tortured to death thanks to your spell! Thank you!! ilysm!!

The Bad News: The Grimmerie turned me into that scarecrow you tried to firebomb last week. Whoops.

Anyways, I think it’s time we finally blow this popsicle stand. Here’s the plan:

[overly long and convoluted plan that Elphaba ignores half of]

Step 57: and after the Monkeys finish their full performance of Wizomania for Dorothy & Co, you’ll be able to slip away with Feldspar! Genius right??

Glinda must take the throne, but I will let you decide on whether we tell her of our full plans. All my love to you both.

Yours forever,

Prince Fiyero Tigelaar of the Vinkus, Captain of the Royal Guard of Oz, the Witch’s Consort, High-Honored Friend of Dorothy Gale, and - apparently - a talking scarecrow

P.S. What the hell was with the fire and screaming babe?? Are you doing okay?? You keep threatening to murder a 12 year old, and it’s kinda freaking me out.

P.P.S. Tell Captain Zek I say hi!! Love the face paint btw - great disguise. (Unless you accidentally did turn my whole house guard green, in which case we probably need to talk)

P.P.P.S. did you really threaten to “stuff a mattress” with me?? I’ve been thinking about that for a week…

[scooteriaferrari]

I brought you an illustration that I did for Skyrim Zine! Here is my favorite Skyrim guild - The Companions. The poster depicts the moment of the attack on Jorrvaskr: the guys are standing in fighting stances, blood is flowing down the steps, and the main building rises in the background. The number of stars matches the number of Companions themselves, and the full moon refers to their wolfish nature.

[scooteriaferrari]

You are a person who covers your counter space in clutter and inadvertently makes a shrine to a long forgotten god who shows up to thank you.

[scooteriaferrari]

Game idea: you've got a series of spells you can use, which you cast by typing them.

But enemy bosses can attack your keyboard. Your "E" key is disabled. FIREBALL is out. ICE9? Also out. Guess they're getting hit with SUMMON FROG.

The bosses can also drop traps on your keys. So if N is trapped, you can cast SUMMON FROG, but the N-trap will go off and you'll take damage.

An advanced late game spell is THESAURUS, which lets you reanalyze a spell. Can't do SUMMON NIGHT WOLF because your N key is broken? THESAURUS it and now it's CREATE DARK DOG.

Another enemy attack would be putting a counter on your keys. So if they put a 1 on your R, you can cast "FIREBALL" but "CIRCLE OF TERROR" is right out.

The two can be combined: a trapped counter only goes off if you type more than the counter. So a trapped 2 on your S means "HEAL SELF" is fine but "TRANSFORM SELF TO SERPENT" will activate the trap and you'll take damage.

One late game boss attacks you by cutting your keyboard in half, and which half works alternates between turns. You gotta figure out which spells you can use that turn.

You could do some fun gimmick-fights. Like a boss sweeps your keyboard off the table and makes you play scrabble instead: you have to spell spells to cast them.

Or wheel of fortune, where you have to get enough money to be able to buy vowels before you can cast spells with vowels in them. The puzzle on the board is a spell the boss is going to cast against you, so it's also a fight against time. If you correctly guess too many letters, they'll solve and you'll get hit with the spell.

I think the way it works is that you fight some mooks and then a boss, and each boss has a new spell they can cast against you.

But you can cast any spell you've seen used against you, so like you start with merely FIREBALL but the first boss hits you with HIGH JUMP, and now you can use that ability out of battle, cause it's a metroidvania of course, and now new areas are accessible.

But bosses can use "forbidden" spells against you, and they do it by typing words you can't.

Like the viking boss hits you with a OÄNDLIG FJÄRIL and you don't have that letter.

(later you can upgrade your keyboard to get access to some forbidden letters, but at great cost: you must sacrifice a letter to gain it, and you don't get to pick which letter the keyboard surgeon will take)

[scooteriaferrari]

My method for staying in at least somewhat-decent shape is to just think of myself as a temporarily embarrassed fit person. If some activity requires strength, athleticism, or endurance, I don't pause to contemplate whether I can do it, the answer is always "of course I can", what an odd question to ask.

And if it turns out that I cannot do that after all, and instead I eat shit, get hurt, and look stupid the whole time I'm dying, I'm not thinking "wow, I can't do shit like this anymore", but "wow, I gotta do this more often, I'm really out of practice". And then get determined to get that level of strength and endurance back, even if I never had it in the first place.

[scooteriaferrari]

"If you turn the scorpion round, that will mean to me, when I return, that you have said yes. The grasshopper will mean no.'... And he again laughed like a drunken demon and left me. Oh, his last words were, "The grasshopper! Be careful of the grasshopper! A grasshopper does not only turn: it hops! It hops! And it hops jolly high!'"

How not to propose to the woman you want to marry.

[scooteriaferrari]

YOU can write whatever you want whenever however forevrr. i have to write something perfect and earth shattering and i have to do it perfectly the first time or else

[scooteriaferrari]

the way ivan aivazovsky looks at the sea…i think…i think that’s what love looks like.

[scooteriaferrari]

gav: let's play swords grampa

dalinar: not right now love

10 days later

gav: IT IS NOW TIME TO PLAY SWORDS GRANDFATHER

[scooteriaferrari]

Literal definition of spyware:

Also From Microsoft’s own FAQ: "Note that Recall does not perform content moderation. It will not hide information such as passwords or financial account numbers. 🤡

[scooteriaferrari]

Wicked + text posts

[scooteriaferrari]

life is fraught-less

~~

shop prints here

[scooteriaferrari]

burning text gif maker

heart locket gif maker

minecraft advancement maker

minecraft logo font text generator w/assorted textures and pride flags

windows error message maker (win1.0-win11)

FromSoftware image macro generator (elden ring Noun Verbed text)

image to 3d effect gif

vaporwave image generator

microsoft wordart maker (REALLY annoying to use on mobile)

you're welcome

[scooteriaferrari]

This is the type of recitals we would like to see

[scooteriaferrari]

💚🧹elphaba | glinda 🫧🩷

[scooteriaferrari]

*slams door open, covered in blood* I finished wind and truth