saccharinehell - Tumblr blog

saccharinehell · 13 days ago

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Sometimes I have these phases, I don't know how to describe tbh. I am starting to think quicker and my thoughts are too much, after this I break, I go insane for an hour I laugh and I cry at the same time, I think I also scream. In this moment I try to get something to hurt myself and I need this so badly in this second and for a few minutes all I can think of is that I have to hurt myself so I can think straight. Can someone relate to this? I don't know what I should do, I just go crazy.

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #bpd episode #bpd emotions #vent post #selfharrrm #actually ptsd #tw depressing thoughts #trauma tw #tw sh related

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saccharinehell · 17 days ago

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I realised I was not ready to grow up so soon. All my life I was trapped in being a mature person even as a Kid. I think of my mom and I miss her. But I don't miss her as a Person. I miss a parent.

#childhood abuse #childhood #missingchildhood #ptsd tw #actually bpd #ptsd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #post traumatic stress disorder #post traumatic manifesto #actually ptsd #ptsd recovery

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saccharinehell · 20 days ago

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I started having problems with emotional accessibility to almost everything.

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #ptbs #post traumatic stress disorder #self protection #ptsd #actually ptsd #ptsd tw #there is absolutely nothing lonelier #loner #loneliest #lonelier version of you

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saccharinehell · 20 days ago

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I cried on the evening of the new year. My first thought was: "Why haven't I killed myself yet?" I even felt a lot lonelier than at any other day.

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #suic1de #su1c1dal

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saccharinehell · 22 days ago

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I hope we can find peace soon

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #bpd episode

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saccharinehell · 22 days ago

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Everything reminds me of you, Mother. But not the good things. It's the bad things that drive me crazy.

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #ptsd #ptbs #post traumatic stress disorder #post traumatic manifesto #trauma tw #tw abuse

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saccharinehell · 22 days ago

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The flashbacks are coming back again. Why does it not end.

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #ptbs #ptsd #post traumatic manifesto #post traumatic stress disorder

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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Why do I always end up being lonely?

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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I should have died at 15

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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You will find someone new, start a new love and a new life while I'm waiting here hoping you might come back.

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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New year is coming and I'm scared.

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #actually obsessive #sadnees #send help #please help #pls help #help

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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I die trying to be special for someone

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #actually obsessive #bpd #born to die

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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Obsessed 'cause I'm bored.

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #actually obsessive #born to die #bpd episode #bpd emotions #borderline fp #bpd fp #bpd favorite person #borderline favorite person #favorite person

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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I need a saviour please

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #borderline problems #borderline pd #born to die

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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We live with the guilt of writing tragedies.

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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Do you understand the special loneliness when Christmas time starts ? This "I have no Family" loneliness. For a kid it's so important to know what Family is. I never had this warm feeling my entire life. Normally I'm used to it but on some cold evenings when it should be cozy with someone else my room just feels so alone and cold.

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saccharinehell · 1 month ago

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You posted a new picture. I saw it. Sometimes I miss you and then I realise again you don't want me. It hurts.

#actually bpd #borderline culture is #borderline personality disorder #bpd #bpd problems #bpd thoughts #bpd vent #actually borderline #borderline blog #actually obsessive #heartbroken #borderline fp #bpd fp #favorite person #borderline favorite person

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