annabella | 24 | nyc | aquarius | gay nerd | cat lover
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biggest lesson learned this week is how much of a nightmare and an inevitability it must be to be defined by a horrific ending to your life
#and how often it happens?#personal#and the cruelty both to the person and the ones who love them#who watch it happen and have to fight those memories taking precedence over everything else#another big lesson is uhhhh#something something having your autonomy ripped from you and being forced to watch something horrific uhhhh#but then also technically having the power to make a different choice but being trapped in your own head like#you've always been so feeling like you dont have a choice but you actually do but also havent you always#but then also the choice you have is not the choice that affects the situation because you've never had that power#it's the one WITHIN that choice that dictates how it will affect you and harm the real decision maker who you also love#makes it uhhh different for you than the people who actively make THAT choice ?#who go through it with you but idk it's just different. like we act like we're all together but are we though#but also that holding onto resentment about it feels shitty because you understand their pov even if they didnt care about yours/believe yo#and life is so fleeting so what if you do something out of anger or injustice or pain you regret forever ?#like do you stay and support and receive comfort or run and protect yourself for the next time#which may not even come#yeah ok no lesson there yet but it feels like maybe there has to be. i'll keep working at it.
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they should invent a grief that doesn’t define you in new and strange ways for the rest of your life
#honestly dont know how to carry on without being drastically#and irrevocably changed#not sure if for the worse and how to make it#for the better#anyways had one of the most traumatic days of my life yesterday#and that's saying something lol#personal#i thought that adulthood would be easier and in a lot of ways it is but#it does seem like it will keep finding new ways to traumatize you#it's just so fucking brutal man#and i feel like i understand my parents more every day#which also scares me tbh
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Book of hours, Flemish, circa 1460
from The Philadelphia Museum of Art
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Uep, I wasn't posting for so long, but. Why not resurrect this page?
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out of curiosity, does everyone have a certain type of character they get attached to or are urs random
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Frankenstein
Drawlloween Day 2
Here's a tribute to Mary Shelley! This is a study of a portrait of her painted by Richard Rothwell's in 1840. Done in Procreate.
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bro. bro. i think i . like my job.
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this show makes me sick
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