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Time loop au where Fives is stuck reliving the day he died but all his attempted conversations with Fox become increasingly more deranged until he learns that Fox is absolutely insane and running on zero sleep and enough caffeine to kill a whale. Turns out all he had to do was say “I have proof that palpatine-” and Fox would kill the bitch instantly. He don’t care if it’s tax evasion, genocide, or a parking ticket. Fox just want to sleep.

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Y'all depression is depressioning

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Something about the way Jedi are very dignified but also ready to go apeshit and leap tall buildings in a single bound is so fun. Star Wars asks the very important question of “what if wizards were also jocks?”

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Anakin: I have three gifts for you Ahsoka. First, your very own army that loves you so much they made hats with your face on them

Ahsoka: Wow, thank you. That’s very sweet of them.

Anakin: Second! Your lightsabers. I made them match me and Obi-wans :)

Ahsoka: Aww

Anakin: And last but not least! The brain cell that we share

Ahsoka: *gasp* Master... you shouldn’t have

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So I did some math.

Kanan in Rebels says that, before Order 66, there were ten thousand Jedi protecting the galaxy.

Let's be extremely generous here, and assume he means ten thousand Jedi Knights. And let's take it a step farther and assume that this is at the end of the Clone Wars when the Jedi were streched thin, and that normally the number of Jedi Knights and Masters is higher. Counting the Corps, Padawans and the increased number of Knights, the number of able, field-ready Jedi could double the 10,000 Kanan mentions.

So, 20,000 fully-fledged Jedi. Half to protect the galaxy, the other half to restore planets, give access to free education, etc.

Of course, we're working on the assumption that none of these Jedi is permanently injured and unable to return to the field, or that they don't have duties to tend to in the Temple like taking care of the younglings. I'm, again, being very, very generous here.

There are a trillion people on Couruscant alone.

This makes the people's expectations (both in and out of universe) of what the Jedi should do absolutely laughable.

They're not enough people to invade a single planet, they aren't even enough to fill a fucking football stadium in my country. You want them to end slavery while also holding negotiations, diplomatic missions and be omniscient enough to know about the Sith Grand Plan? Be fucking real, man. They're streched thin doing everything they can.

My 140 people quirky Church hasn't solved human traffiking on our 7 billion planet population (same exact ratio btw). Should we stop giving soup and home-made clothes to the poor and focus on an impossible goal so that we don't stray from our purpose?

All my estimates have been extremely generous, almost to an extreme, and as such they are probably not very acurate. It's way, way worse.

And that's barely scratching the surface. On numbers alone, the Jedi cannot do any of the shit you want them to do. If we count permanent injuries and disabilities that may take Jedi out of the field, children, elders, archivists and others, the number becomes much more depressing.

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Prequel team done – (x) 

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And here we see the wild commander in it's natural habitat: making clever use of camouflage to confound nearby predators

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Some Jedi seem to follow traditions of their birth culture and other don't. I haven't see any explanations to this, so I imagine that younglings are searching for their birth place in space google and deciding if it cool enough to follow its traditions.

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related star wars thought (& probably not an original observation):

Bail Organa was fully in on the whole Padme & Anakin and their kids situation so if he’d met Luke he would have realised who he was like. immediately. 

and very possibly would have been like ‘hm ok now would be a good time to sit down Luke & Leia and have a talk with them about this entire fucked up situation. they’re both adults now and they have a right to know. & I wouldn’t feel right letting them fight alongside each other not knowing that they’re twins.’

& then you know! a certain about of drama & emotional turmoil might have been avoided.

but unfortunately. he died like a DAY before luke & leia met. :(

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Hey have we considered that the reason that one guy in the Prequels was really chill about offering some Jedi death sticks isn't some massive conspiracy that the Jedi are all doing massive amounts of drugs, or even that he didn't realize they were Jedi, but instead that arresting people for non-violent drug offenses is fucking evil and the Jedi aren't cops? And the people of Coruscant generally know that as long as they're not killing people the Jedi aren't actually interested in fucking them over?

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i love sith!obi-wan as much as the next person but also, consider: obi-wan being the most stubbornly light-side jedi of all time

through a holocron, anakin and obi-wan come face-to-face with the darkest versions of themselves. anakin, of course, sees a monster. darth vader at his most extreme, murderous and even sadistic in his cruelty, not just violent but enjoying the vicious power his violence grants him. he's like a demon brought to life, the dark side in its purest form, malevolent and evil

meanwhile, obi-wan is still obi-wan just slightly worse. obi-wan but with like a bit of a drinking problem and he's let himself go a little. obi-wan but he's gotten addicted to world of space warcraft and is chugging more space mountain dew than might be ideal. The Darkness Within is just obi-wan indulging his self-destructive tendencies and maybe being a bit more of a bitch than he already is, turning up scruffy and less well-groomed than og obi-wan but still absolutely, unmistakably in the light

dude is incorruptible. a beacon of light, stubbornly staying light no matter what life throws at him.

(naturally, obi-wan is still horrified by "evil" obi-wan. dude is listening to his albums on speaker phone. he is so inconsiderate)

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hey girl you can aggressively negotiate with my blaster any day

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could you imagine any shit ass naval officer trying to make idle small talk with the wheezing refrigerator of a cyborg haunting the bridge of his ship and the guy is like, talking fondly of naval academy experiences and in a genuine overture the guy casually asks vader what year he graduated his own academy. and not only did vader never so much as look at a military school he also only turned 23 last week

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my central padmé take is that she is someone who constantly and increasingly feels like she has blood on her hands that she can never wash off. this is the core of her deal to me. ever since i started seeing her like this she has never ceased to make perfect sense to me

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Was supposed to be a warmup but eh…

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Steve Rogers is a firm believer of museums giving back the artefacts that they stole, not only because he genuinely believes people deserve to have their things back, but also because the Smithsonian refuses to give him back he shit, and if he doesn't get his family recipe book his mother's jacket and his father's hat, god willing he will-

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Whatever fandom has told you about mandos and children, Jaster's approach to dealing with ten year old orphans is to deploy them on bomb-planting missions in enemy territory and giving them blasters to take their revenge on his enemies with.