mathsbian

[mathsbian]

This whole thing about scanning your face to prove tour age is making me remember, in 2018 while out in paris we got our wallet stolen during a particularly busy night at a lesbian bar. It was very late and with no money to buy metro tickets we were effectively stranded, but some people helped us and we ended up staying the night at a really sweet older man's place. His face was deeply scarred and he was missing an eye. We chatted on our way and he told me about his life, probably to help calm me down. He explained he had been stuck in a house fire 20 years ago and had had multiple rounds of facial reconstruction and a skin graft, but there's only so much surgery can do so he just learned to live with it. I remember he said he liked the queer bars because they're the only place people don't really stare at him.

At some point I took out my phone, and at the time I was using face unlock. This prompted him to tell me all the ways this technology doesn't work on him. How his phone selfie camera doesn't focus right because it's not a detecting a face. How he had to update his ID the old fashioned way, because the website kept rejecting his photos. And how it was becoming more and more common, and how it was making his life way harder.

This was 7 years ago, and now whenever I see this sort of technology I think of how that guy can't use it. And how house fires are pretty common, and how anything from being born this way to a skin condition to heavy tattooing can probably cause the same issue. Can these people get age verified ? Will they just lose access to all social media, which are increasingly necessary in society, if this becomes the norm ? These are people who are already driven out of public spaces due to how they look, and they're getting pushed out online too all in the interest of companies wanting more money.

[mathsbian]

the way people talk about trans men on this hellsite feels slightly Off™ i don't id as transmasc anymore, but it kinda hurts to see those posts, honestly. not the users' fault, since i know they're just venting their frustrations, but still. i'll just blacklist the term and i'll be fine.

--

[mathsbian]

any character design can be improved by making them fatter

[mathsbian]

Actually, this is the one thing I'll say about PDB -

So those of us who have been in this conversation for a Long Time will remember the time a user initially identifying as a cis girl was harassing transmascs for using the term transandrophobia. I won't name them, but their blog was paganism-focused and they had a twin sibling. Those of you who remember that time should know who I mean from that.

This user was prolific. They complied a giant googledoc callout for hundreds of trans men (including my old acc) and accused people of heinous things (100% fabricated). It went on for months and when they started getting called out as a cis woman talking over trans men, suddenly, they claimed they were actually questioning their gender and were possibly transmasc themself. I'm not one to question anyone's gender ID - as far as I care they're transmasc. But, I do want to note that they only came out as a result of being called out. Which isn't to say that their coming out wasn't genuine, but it is an unusual way to go about things.

With PDB - I get the sense something similar has happened. At first PDB was being called a cis man but that no longer seems to be the case. Again, not contesting gender in the slightest. The situation just reminds me of the one I described above.

There's another similarity too - the above mentioned blog started getting chummy with a few transandrophobic transfem blogs on here, right around the time the blocklist was made. It was even called something like "the transmasc blocklist" but I don't remember precisely what it was called. Anyway - the same thing appears to be happening with PDB aligning with transandrophobic blogs. In both cases it seems to be for validation.

The point I'm trying to make is that this is a 2 nickels moment, that the transmasc community on here has been through this sort of thing before and transandrophobes try this bullshit every now and again, but it doesn't work. Tldr: Forget about PDB and the other user I mentioned. They don't matter in this conversation and you deserve to be able to talk about transphobia you've faced without all these people coming out of the woodwork.

[mathsbian]

I feel I should clarify on my PDB post -

Specifically, I did say I'm not doubting their coming out as nonbinary - I do think that's genuine. But I do think there should be room to point out how it's happened before when a previously cis-identifying person has barged into a trans conversation, spoken over everyone and after being called out, then come out as not cis in some way. Not doubting anyone's identity, it's just the situation is something I've seen before and I was musing over how much it reminded me of something that happened like 3-5 years ago on here. 2 nickels.

I hoped people would read between the lines and know I'm not doubting their gender at all - but unfortunately some people have gotten the wrong end of the stick. So for the avoidance of doubt, I think doubting anyone's gender is unacceptable and that's not what I'm doing here. I was hoping to try and describe a phenomenon I've seen.

Treating these comings out as 100% genuine (because as I said, to not do so isn't okay), someone coming out as nonbinary or trans does not then mean they get to be transphobic or exorsexist to anyone else. My original post was meant to be more of a two nickels moment more than anything! Just so we're clear.

[mathsbian]

I think it's interesting how you and your ilk harassed a nonbinary person calling them a "cis man" like this is very interesting surely y'all aren't a bunch of terfs

Literally the second he/they came out as non-binary I started treated him/them as such and let people who were unaware of that recent change know. I genuinely think you're the stupidest motherfucker on this planet. Perhaps it's inadvisable to spend weeks making oneself the "me agreeing with radfems is notable and you should pay attention because I'm a cis guy" person right before suddenly going "oh wait I'm not a cis guy after all surprise lol." Like, that's gonna take some time to disseminate!

This being framed by radfem-deer-dickweed as "pushing me back into the closet" is the most annoying thing it's possible to imagine. Okay, person who stands by and defends using th***ab as a weapon against non-binary people AFAB, I'm soooooo sorry not everyone instantly got the newsletter about your evolving gender identity after you spent a lot of time and effort establishing yourself as A Cis Guy Who Agrees With Radfems So Pay Attention To Me, that's definitely you being a victim.

[mathsbian]

if you tell an indigenous trans man to cut his long hair so that he "passes better" then im tying you to an anchor and dropping you in the middle of the ocean

[mathsbian]

In reference to my last reblog

Ok instead of thinking about the unknown creature that is chasing us through the woods of Appalachia, think about that wonderful train ride we took last week

[mathsbian]

But also.

YOU DIDNT SEE SHIT. shut up about it. The more you look at it and talk about it the more it’s gonna follow you HOME.

i know that i am beating a dead horse by saying this, but the entities and strange things that people are claiming to see & encounter in the woods of north carolina, south Carolina, Tennessee, Appalachian mountains and so on are probably not skinwalkers. skinwalkers are shapeshifters that are used within the navajo tribe, and the navajo live out west near utah and the likes. im not sure they're solely used within the navajo tribe, but most are. plus the descriptions of the things ppl in the south claim to see dont add up. it's usually an injured deer, or some 102939292ft tall, pale, slenderman looking creature. skinwalkers real name translates to jump in the skins, which is a sorcerer using the skin of animals in order to shapeshift. so unless a member of the navajo tribe is sending someone thousands of miles across the country in order to terrorize a random white family in the Appalachian mountains for no reason, and unless theres an animal out there that looks like an anorexic slenderman man with no face, i think you're fine.

[mathsbian]

Why have we forgotten the not-deer. If you’re in the Appalachians and you’re seeing something you think is a shapeshifter or some shit, it’s not a <word I don’t use> or <other word I definitely don’t use>. It’s a not-deer. But the other word I won’t use referencing stories from around Niagara Falls is definitely more likely than something from the Southwest!

i know that i am beating a dead horse by saying this, but the entities and strange things that people are claiming to see & encounter in the woods of north carolina, south Carolina, Tennessee, Appalachian mountains and so on are probably not skinwalkers. skinwalkers are shapeshifters that are used within the navajo tribe, and the navajo live out west near utah and the likes. im not sure they're solely used within the navajo tribe, but most are. plus the descriptions of the things ppl in the south claim to see dont add up. it's usually an injured deer, or some 102939292ft tall, pale, slenderman looking creature. skinwalkers real name translates to jump in the skins, which is a sorcerer using the skin of animals in order to shapeshift. so unless a member of the navajo tribe is sending someone thousands of miles across the country in order to terrorize a random white family in the Appalachian mountains for no reason, and unless theres an animal out there that looks like an anorexic slenderman man with no face, i think you're fine.

[mathsbian]

props to stem people wtf! i can bullshit my way through any english essay because literally u just have to say stuff. but for stem paper u have to say stuff AND it has to be true. wack. 

[mathsbian]

I got to help this amazing couple at work. It was just pure chance, but I was who they walked up to. They said they wanted jewelry cleaned and that they had a hold they wanted to check on.

Let me set the stage. They were a couple in their fifties or so, he was wearing motorcycle leathers, he had skulls rings, tattoos; he was bristly and unshaven. She was dressed to the nines, full length dress, platinum blonde, $500 shoes, nails, all of it. The cognitive dissonance looking from one to the other was staggering.

She thought she needed to get her ring cut off, but I walked her through the best way to see if we could salvage it and we were able to get it off. I put it into the shop to be sized up, and then we got to work.

He handed me a solid gold pendant he’d been given from a mobster that was Jesus’ face with rubies for eyes and a ruby and diamond crown of thorns. (Dear god why didn’t they use any stone but rubies for the eyes?) And then they had me get their hold from the back. It was about 5k worth of diamonds in her ring, and an even thousand for his. It was for their 30th anniversary.

They left smiling and happy.

Today I had to call her and tell her that her ring couldn’t be sized up without destroying it, and that I’d have to specially order his ring in his size or we’d destroy that too. It’s a nerve wracking call to make, people can get so angry about bumps in the road.

But she just laughed and called me a dear. She came in bringing a small bottle of champagne for me and my girlfriend and we picked out a different ring to house her diamond. She radiated charisma and charm the whole time.

After a while she realized she didn’t have her car keys. She went outside to check on where she’d left them. After investigating she blithely came back in and asked for a step ladder so she could get through her sun roof as it turned out she’d locked her keys in the car. I loaned her one then she went and heisted her way headfirst into her own car while wearing a sundress. It was fucking hilarious and amazing.

While we were shopping afterward she was all sunshine, bubbles, and shoe recommendations. She told me that had brunch coming up with a frenemy and she needed her new ring to really hold its own.

Near the end she got quieter. She looked at me and told me she had almost gotten divorced from her rakish biker man. That she had filled out papers and everything. A new paramour had literally bought her a god damn house. But she realized she was still madly in love with him, and they had to make it work. And she told me they had to have a lot of talks, and communicate, that they’d allowed themselves to drift apart and that they made a choice to come back together.

I was obviously just hanging on her every word. I was walking her to the back to pay by that point and she hugged me, thanked me, and then turned her smile back on. Without missing a beat she turned and instantly overwhelmed my customer service rep by telling him she’d gotten in through the sunroof of her car without flashing anyone.

[mathsbian]

trying to explain to tumblr that the Middle Class in not their enemy

[mathsbian]

Me last night: “I wish I could draw… I want to draw Jessica Fletcher but with my maternal grandmother’s body-type…”

[mathsbian]

One thing I love about studying math is that when you ask any fellow student or prof why they went into math we all say it’s because we find it beautiful. It’s so diametrically opposed to the opinion that everyone else has about math that it feels like some kind of virus that infects you and makes you unable to study anything else

[mathsbian]

Super weird to have innocuously added a silly personal anecdote to a post you didn't realize was super popular...

Only to have it cross your dash a week later and find out that like 12,000 people think you're lying.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[mathsbian]

like, okay, consent does literally just mean agree. which is what enables this little rhetorical trick. because there's all this cultural emphasis on sexual consent, which is just expressed as consent, a lot of phrases whose intended meanings are "rape is bad" can be taken literally to mean "i should get to agree to everything that happens in my vicinity."