makiarose

[makiarose]

she’s the blueprint

[makiarose]

Neptune ♡

I apologize for making these so sad lmao, I recently cut off my situationship, not because I wanted to. I just had to, it was never going to go anywhere and he was just using me as some kind of option that he'll never choose or a placeholder in his life and I got fed up and decided to choose myself. this explains why, i just thought i'd use this as an outlet to cope and put my emotions somewhere. hope you enjoy. <3

I am an afterthought. I am in the back of your mind or not in it at all, im not the person you think of when something makes you happy, or the person you run to when something makes you sad. im not on a pedestal, im not a priority. i dont even think i am a person to you, but i still loved you, i still longed for you and i definitely thought of you when something made me happy and i definitely wanted to run to you when something made me sad. but you don't notice me, you see me, but you dont notice me. you touch me but you dont hold me. you kiss me, but you dont kiss me and i settle for it, because its you. but, eventually i realized that theres more to life than the person who could not love you right, or even love you at all. i mean it sucks thinking that someone means a lot to you but they dont even really think of you. at night, in the morning, when they are busy, when they are bored, i get it. in the moment it feels like your world is ending and you wonder why they just dont want you back, but its not about you. the world is not out to get you, you are not cursed, you are not incapable of feeling anything other than sadness, loneliness adn emptiness. they just aren't yours, and you are not theirs. and when you think about it, i mean really think about it, is that really such a bad thing? why would you ever want someone who doesnt want you in the same way that you want them?

~ makia rose <3

[makiarose]

sometimes you cant explain what you see in a person. its just the way they take you to a place where no one else can.

[makiarose]

" I wanted to be loved more than I wanted to be alive." -Unknown

[makiarose]

brilliant.

There is something exquisite about not being able to wrap my mind around things. . . I think we need to practice it more often, the unknowing. [...] How tiny we are, and how unfathomable the world.

Anna Badkhen, Bright Unbearable Reality

[makiarose]

Linda Pastan, from Waiting for My Life: Poems; "What We Want"

[Text ID: "and in the morning / our arms ache. / We don't remember the dream, / but the dream remembers us."]

[makiarose]

"If I am for others, then who is for me? And if I am for myself, then what am I for?"

[makiarose]

Flesh & Bone Part II ♡

continued c:

she can't stop, she keeps going back even though she knows she could do better. she doesn't want him, but she does. she just wants him to stop. he kisses her like he wants something, something she cant give. "next time." he says. taking one more piece of her, every time they assemble he's going to leave her heartbroken. he warned her to shut off her emotions but she can't do it. she still stupidly cares, she still wishes, she still wants. she needs someone who cares, someone who wants her for her, a friend. he's not that. but at least he's someone who wants something from her, but he's just using her and she shamefully lets him.

[makiarose]

Flesh & Bone ♡

a poem soley based on me and my pathetic situationship.

he liked her body, not her. he liked the sex, not her. she used to think she was fine with it. making out for fun. no feelings, just feeling. but she was wrong, he doesn't want her and he treats her like and object. something to kiss but his heart isnt in it, he couldnt care less, he just wants her body, she still doesnt know why. shes not as pretty as the other girls but he still wants it. he used to wonder, he used to care. they used to be friends. he only wants to sweep her up in the moment, in the night. but he doesnt want her, he doesnt care about her. he's just using her.

[makiarose]

"I need a life that isn't just about needing to escape my life."

[makiarose]

(no title) ♡

before you get angry with me, read it all.

right person, wrong timing doesnt exist and before you get upset, let me explain. they dont love you. not enough, if at all. there was never a right time. love was always frustrating and difficult and it comes when you're not really wanting it to, or at least the worthwile kind does. they chose not to pick you. they could've made it work, they didnt value you enough to try. thats on them, not you. they're not the right person. the right person would pick you no matter the time. now you can get upset.

~ makia rose <3

[makiarose]

literally no one talks about this enough, the overthinking the anxiousness about certain situations and current situations in my case.

i want to be a sweet and friendly girl but there’s all this anxiety. and the horrors

[makiarose]

ms angelou i will never get over this

[makiarose]

“In my opinion, the best thing you can do is to find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you … That’s the kind of person that’s worth sticking with.”

— Juno

[makiarose]

I want to dissect all of my capacity’s

[makiarose]

[makiarose]

marlena by julie buntin