mac-aro-ni

[mac-aro-ni]

some arospec flag gifs below for your aro doomscrolling experience

[mac-aro-ni]

That’s the thing though. Romance is a social construct. Technically, society decided what counts as romance and everyone else is just sort of following the lead of books or movies they read/saw as children and real relationships they saw playing out in front of them.

I can’t tell the difference between my platonic feelings and my romantic feelings. They can honestly kind of flip on a dime. For me, it boils down to if I feel icky calling it romance myself. If I don’t, I’m open to labeling a relationship romantic if the other person wants that. If I do feel icky, I decide my feelings must just be platonic and don’t pursue anything further.

The reason alloros and aros both struggle to define romance is because it’s not really a thing. It’s kind of like how some trans people don’t really experience dysphoria or euphoria on a gender level and kind of just decided they’d prefer being referred to differently from before and maybe get GAT/HRT. And how no one can satisfactorily answer what a woman is.

you ever just question whether you're aro but then realise it's impossible because you don't know what romance let alone romantic attraction is and you also don't know if any of your past feelings for people were crushes or not or if what you felt for your partner was just emotional closeness and you decided that this is a relationship now

like for some reason the idea of being demiromantic popped into my head recently but also what

[mac-aro-ni]

The great thing about the aromantic spectrum in my opinion is that this experience can also be aromantic (like. Not gray, just a). You can id as aromantic for the same reasons you seem to currently ID as quioromantic/WTFromantic (hi! I use these labels as well, also grayromantic, aroflux, and sometimes demiromantic because at least some of the time I can develop what I believe to be romantic feelings after being close friends with someone for long enough).

Since we’re trying to define ourselves by the lack of something, and it’s hard to know if you’re experiencing the thing you might be lacking, there’s lots of room to just. Decide things for yourself. I decided that the deep attachment I have with my current partner was romantic and that I was in fact open to dating them. I got sick of trying to have the feelings tell me what they meant, if they were platonic or romantic feelings, and made the choice of what they meant to me and told the feelings they better stick around.

Being arospec or even fully aromantic can mean you get to decide what you think romantic feelings are. And if that’s something that sounds appealing to anyone reading this I encourage you to make a decision about anyone you’re feeling confused about. And if it feels impossible to choose, maybe flip a coin and see how the result makes you feel; do you feel trapped trying to label the feelings romantic, or maybe do you feel disappointed labeling them platonic? And you are of course always allowed to give things time. Maybe you can’t make a decision about this person now, but will be able to one day in the future (I wasn’t able to choose when my partner originally asked me out and it took another three months for us to get together romantically).

you ever just question whether you're aro but then realise it's impossible because you don't know what romance let alone romantic attraction is and you also don't know if any of your past feelings for people were crushes or not or if what you felt for your partner was just emotional closeness and you decided that this is a relationship now

like for some reason the idea of being demiromantic popped into my head recently but also what

[mac-aro-ni]

some people on here need a gentle reminder that arospecs ARE aromantic. thats the point of the aromantic spectrum. that being aromantic.. is a spectrum. ive had demiromantic people ask me if they can call themselves aromantic. YES OF COURSE YOU CAN YOU ARE AROMANTIC. im sure some people choose to identify more as arospec than aromantic and thats fine, but in general, arospecs ARE aromantic, by virtue of being on the aromantic spectrum. like aromanticism is defined as little to none romantic attraction. the ‘little’ part of that is there for a reason.

[mac-aro-ni]

Happy Pride to the cishet aro men out there

[mac-aro-ni]

ASPEC PRIDE POST GO

Happy Pride Month to:

Alloaces and Aroallos

Gray Aces and Aros

Demisexuals and Demiromantics

Aegosexuals and Aegoromantics

Acespikes and Arospikes

Fictosexuals and Fictoromantics

Trans Aces and Aros

Nonbinary Aces and Aros

Xenogender Aces and Aros

Aspec system members

People who are Aspec due to trauma

Aces who want sexual relationships and Aros who want romantic relationships

Sex averse Aces and romance averse Aros

And any other aspec folks we didn’t mention here! All of yall are so cool and we hope you have a wonderful Pride Month!!

(Everyone feel free to add on other specific aspec labels that we didn’t include!)

[mac-aro-ni]

People said that Tumblr isn't a great place to post original art that isn't fanart, but I'm doing it anyway because I haven't got the motivation to draw anything else

Happy pride month lads! 🧡💛🤍💙

from an aroace potato :)

[mac-aro-ni]

shoutout to acespec and/or arospec people who still feel some amount of sexual/romantic attraction btw. shoutout to everyone who isn't fully aro/ace and isn't fully allo. shoutout to the aspecs who feel like they don't fully fit in aro/ace communities or allo communities because of it. i love you all i am baking you cookies

[mac-aro-ni]

*emerges from my slime*

What’s going on this webbed site? I’ve started primarily using cohost, but I don’t have an aro focused page (yet, just because the ability to mass edit posts or queue them isn’t a thing yet and it’s difficult to run a blog like this without a queue to help spread things out. Maybe I’ll make a bot that automatically crossposts from here? But then I have to learn how to make a bot… oh, the woes of brain fog and various other cognitive problems)

- Mod Meg

[mac-aro-ni]

here's to the romance repulsed aromantics. not wanting to date or have a marriage or partnership is okay. it's not unhealthy, shameful or bad to enjoy being single and wanting to stay that way. not wanting to be involved in discussions about romance or other peoples' romantic lives is not a personal attack against the people who have them. not wanting to be touched, called pet names or shown affection is a proper boundary to establish if that's how you feel. not having an interest in fictional romances (romantic comedies, shipping, etc.). is not a moral failing. not wanting to be near or witnessing romantic displays, fictional or real does not make you an asshole.

you are allowed to assert what oversteps your boundaries. you are allowed to curate your experience online and have conversations with those you interact with in real life about your boundaries. you do not owe the world romance or time and attention for it when your needs aren't being met. your experience as an aromantic person deserves to be positive when and where possible, just like anyone else's- you do not deserve to be uncomfortable

[mac-aro-ni]

Happy ASAW 2024, here's something about community !

[mac-aro-ni]

trying to prove that you don't experience something is so difficult because ultimately you cannot know what something feels like if you haven't experienced it which is why being asexual and aromantic respectively are so hard to figure out

[mac-aro-ni]

also in honor of aro awareness week, all aromantics are queer! cishet aromantics, alloaros, partnering aros, arofluxes, demiromantics, queerplatonic aros and every other aromantic identity! every single aromantic is queer, every aspect of aromanticism is queer in a society that inherently demands romantic attraction! thank you, have a great week 💚🤍🖤

[mac-aro-ni]

Arospecs!

I’d genuinely appreciate every single one of you sending me your stories so that I can (anonymously) post them during #aromanticspectrumawarenessweek2024 !

[mac-aro-ni]

I feel like a lotta people don’t understand this but <2 is NOT just a “platonic heart.” It’s used by the aspec (mostly aro) community to signify a love that differs and is divergent from the norm and what is typically seen as “love.” It is also used by loveless aros to signify their lack of feeling love, but presence of another emotion like compassion or appreciation.

Please don’t simplify it down to being a “platonic heart.” It’s so much more than that.

[mac-aro-ni]

it's time for me to share this cake I decorated for valentine's day

DO NOT TAG AS ACE

[mac-aro-ni]

HAPPY LOVE LOSES WEDNESDAY TO ALL WHO CELEBRATE