We all have a darkness inside of us...and we are all in constant search of someone who will accept it. People whose demon play well with ours.
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Contained... Art: Yours truly
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I Love You Don’t throw those words every so often…that you forget to know what it means.
Belle (via ladywanderess)
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STOP telling me to get a boyfriend or to get married. If it was so easy, i would have done it already. And I’m NO LONGER the type of person who settles in a mediocre relationship just because everyone around me already did. I would rather die old and alone than die old and lonely…there is a difference.
Belle (via ladywanderess)
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Leave or be left behind? I think the pain of leaving the one you love behind is more painful than watching them walk away.
Belle
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10 Ready To Send Naughty Texts
10 sexy and powerful “done for you” texts. How to get a man BURNING with desire for you with just a push of a button. Click here to get this free report!
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To the man waiting for me down the road.
I”m not the easiest person to love, I never have been and I never will be. I don;t know about you but I have been living my life pretty much independently for this past few years that I am so used to it and I have already forgotten how it is to rely on someone. Well, it was never my best suit after all.
I have fallen in love once before. I have given everything, and didn’t even bother sparing a single piece of my heart for myself. I trusted with all of my being only to have all that I have given slapped back on my face. So...it will most likely be a lot harder for you to get a hold of what remains of my heart.
It’s now on its most fragile and vulnerable state that I have built up bricks upon bricks of thick walls around it for protection. You might even find it impossible to get in. But believe me...it isn’t. It’ll be hard, but not impossible.
You may give all you’ve got to prove yourself to me, but I might still find it hard to believe in you. You may find it unfair for me to be suspicious of your motives just because my past turned out to be the exact opposite of “Happily Ever After”.
I am sorry. I can’t help it. Both my heart and my mind already refused to believe in the promises of love.
Over the years of being by myself. I have already learned to rely on myself for everything. That no matter how much you try to reach out a helping hand...I might just slap your hand away.
This is my world...variations of different kinds of walls in every turn. A never ending maze where you will loose yourself in trying to find a way in.
You can give up. I won’t hold it against you. I’m already used in people giving up on me that even though it hurts like hell, I’d still choose it over relying on someone who might not be around for long.
You see? Even before I give myself a chance to believe in you, I have already doubted you.
But...
If by some miraculous and fortunate twist of fate that you decided to stick around. That you decided to push your way in no matter how I pull away...I will make all your efforts worth it.
If in case you have proven yourself worthy of all the heartaches I may encounter once I have given you my heart..I will show you how much love it can still provide despite the many cracks.
I will let you into my world and I will come into yours. And together we will forge them into one making it the one place we can call a home.
I cannot promise you everything, but the one thing I can give you without any regrets whatsoever is my fragile hearty, trusting that you will not break it any more than it already is.
I cannot promise you the best kind of love in the world but I will give you the best version of me that no one has ever came so close to see. I will dedicate myself to you. Love those you love. Walk along with you on every troubled road. I will not let go of your hand and I will take care of your heart the same way I know you will take care of mine. I will be with you through out our lives, and promise to hold on to you specially on your darkest days.
I cannot promise you a smooth sailing travel ahead of us. But if you love me and our family-to-be I will do what I can to make our journey theg greatest adventure of our lives, until we reach the end of the road. Together we will face our creator, leaving our children with the love they so deserve from us...their father and mother-to-be.
Artwork By Leonid Afremov
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She didn't change, no human change just like that. She just learned...to rely on him. Because he promised her...that she could
Belle
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TOP OF THE WORLD | A BEND IN THE ROAD
For a time, I thought my faith, it must be hiding Searching through the sky, hoping to find a way A way, to get me through the day Don't know where I belong, is this where I should stay
There are certain paths in our lives that take us into a crossroad. A few years ago, just when I thought that my life is going smoothly, life took me to a crossroad. With just one look, everyone will see which one is the right road to take. Which road that those whose hearts are pure, those whose loyalty to their friends are never questioned will obviously take. And the other road made me question myself; it made me feel like a monster for even thinking twice on which one to take. It wasn’t an easy decision. The time it took me to decide which one to take was a painful process. Every time I weigh the consequences of the possible decisions to take…all it cost was pain in both ways. Asking for signs didn’t help. I felt alone thru it all. Not that I blame anyone for it, and I don’t have any reason to. Because the decision I’ll be coming up with will either hurt me, or hurt them. But at that moment, the road that I thought was the one closer to Happiness was the one I took. Despite all the wrong signs, despite all the warnings, and despite the fact that I know in my heart that in taking it, I’ll be betraying a good friend, in the end I took the road less traveled by. I though then that for the first time in my life, I chose me. I chose my happiness. I was selfish…I know, but I didn’t care.
And it turned my world upside down. It didn’t take me long to realized that it’s the biggest mistake of my life. I only made one choice...and it made me a both villain and a victim at the same time. Karma is a Bitch? I think that’s an oversimplification. It might sound a little exaggerated, especially coming from me, being the one who betrayed a friend just for a little taste of an illusionary happiness, but my life felt like hell after that. I lost friends, I lost myself...and for a time I thought even God is nowhere to be found. I found myself in different world I do not feel belong to and sleep was my only salvation.
Lift me up, when I am falling You're my friend, when I was calling Now I'm on top of the world Top of the whole wide world Yeah, you've always been believing Gave my life a whole new meaning Now I'm on top of the world Top of the whole wide world
You know those moments in your life when you feel like you have all the reasons to give up. And you know that if you did, no one would question you for it. Because they know that you have all the right to do so. The amazing thing about all of this is, even though I’ve hurt some people indirectly for the mistakes that I have done, those people still chose to stick around. Whenever I think I'm falling deeper and deeper into this dark chasm...these people reaches out their hands and pulled me up. They believed in me when I couldn’t. Pulled me up when the gravity of my mistake was pushing me so far down the ground. I lost my purpose...they gave me one. I lost myself and they handed me pieces of it until I became whole once again. I was calling desperately...and they answered effortlessly. They walked with me thru all of it. They gave me reasons to accept what I have become...and proved to me that no matter what it is...they too shall embrace it. They were hurt and betrayed too by my mistake...but they have forgiven and accepted me. I may have lost a best friend, Something I’ll always be regretful of, but my mistake opened up my eyes to two people who were always there for me. They never gave up on me, although I almost did. I tried to pull away whenever I get the chance, and they never got tired of pulling me back. I never knew and I probably never would have known if I didn’t choose to take this road. And God? Oh God…I’ve never felt His presence so strong before. I made a mistake, took a wrong turn, I was lost but there in the middle of nowhere I have found much more than myself, but also pieces that will complete me. So see…it was all worth it after all.
There's a strength in me, it seems, I have forgotten Now I, realized today, I'm starting to dream again Again, was a matter of when? I guess we all lose our way, now and then
It has been a long and painful process of holding on and accepting what I have become. Then one day...my life started fixing itself up. I could literally feel my life and myself healing. And slowly...something started burning in me. It was the strength to finally stand up again in my own two feet...and move forward. And there it was...the light at the end of the tunnel. I found myself laughing again. I started feeling courage growing strong inside of me. Time has finally started healing me. It was all in God's perfect timing. My life is finally back on track and moving towards a brand new goal. I guess we do lose our way now and then.
There are a few decisions we make that re-shape our lives forever. Chances we take that can either make or break us. A certain leap of faith where we will find ourselves landing hard in a new world where not all the people we have loved will be able to make it. Those decisions...those chances...those risks...are and always will be worth taking no matter how they end up and no matter how much they changes us,. Whether they turn out to be the biggest mistake of our life...or the best decision you have ever made, it doesn’t matter...what’s important is that we took it...and it made us a completely different person than we use to be. That makes it all worth it. Be proud of it. Some people may cringe when they hear it...but there some who will learn from it…just the way you did.
Keep going, you’ll never know, what you thought might be the end may turn out to be just a bend in the road.
©Top Of The World Sung By Mandy Moore
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You know those moments in your life when you feel like you have all the reasons to give up. And you know that if you did, no one would question you for it. Because they know that you have all the right to do so. The amazing thing about all of this is, even though I’ve hurt some people indirectly for the mistakes that I have done, those people still chose to stick around. Whenever I think I'm falling deeper and deeper into this dark chasm...these people reaches out their hands and pulled me up. They believed in me when I couldn’t. Pulled me up when the gravity of my mistake was pushing me so far down the ground. I lost my purpose...they gave me one. I lost myself and they handed me pieces of it until I became whole once again. I was calling desperately...and they answered effortlessly. They walked with me thru all of it. They gave me reasons to accept what I have become...and proved to me that no matter what it is...they too shall embrace it. They were hurt and betrayed too by my mistake...but they have forgiven and accepted me. I may have lost a best friend, Something I’ll always be regretful of, but my mistake opened up my eyes to two people who were always there for me. They never gave up on me, although I almost did. I tried to pull away whenever I get the chance, and they never got tired of pulling me back. I never knew and I probably never would have known if I didn’t choose to take this road.
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Wanderlust ; (n.) A strong desire or urge to wander or travel and explore the world.
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You know the feeling of wanting a shoulder you can cry on? And you know that there are people out there you can really lean on. But you choose not to... Because you didn't want to bother them... With the dramas in your life...that isn't even there...and is all just in your head... But still killing you inside. So you face it all alone.
Belle
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