lecham1644

[lecham1644]

When you try to impress the love of your life but end up hurting your back instead 😅

[lecham1644]

sydcarmy f1 au: chapter 5!! 🏁🏎️

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61913656/chapters/166635499

username: lechham1644 on A03

[lecham1644]

thought about the women of the pitt and started sobbing

[lecham1644]

so the sydcarmy f1 au is back!! 🏁🏎️

https://archiveofourown.org/works/61913656/chapters/166075534

username: lechham1644 on A03

pls let me know your thoughts!

[lecham1644]

After rewatch, feel like Carmy knows Syd has every reason to leave him and invited her to the Ever dinner because that was his one last shot at trying to give her something he knows she deserves. It’s also the second funeral of the season.

The episode before Forever was called Apologies. He says he doesn’t want to be so hard to keep up with to Syd, but doesn’t elaborate and it frustrates her. His inviting her to Ever was a kind of apology for how he treated her, and he had to charm her and talk her into going!

Add in his remarks to Syd and Marcus about how he has to get right with everything and everyone in Legacy, which tells us we know he does understand what it takes and has been avoiding it.

He’s realized he will lose Syd forever if he doesn’t change. It’s why he gets hung up on apologizing to Claire as a start, because we saw at an Al-Anon meeting in the past, a woman went into very detailed remarks about how if you wait too long to say you’re sorry it gets stuck inside you. We also learn Carmy feels guilt about not doing more for Mikey in his convo with Cicero, unsaid things.

Syd wanted to be seen as his equal, and wants a star he can’t give her; and he knows now he can’t try to hold on too tightly because he did and it pushed her away. He went from hands off in S2, to tossing her a partnership agreement and never leaving her alone in S3, to ending up having to let go to start to work on himself. A sign, to me, that he actual does really love her more than himself.

This line from Carmy when he’s talking to Chef Terry: “It feels like I’ve been starting forever.”

Both Syd and Carmy are caught in a loop where they’re both repeating their pasts and starting over. Terry tells Carmy about herself at his age: “You have no idea what you’re doing, and therefore, you’re invincible.”

But Syd and Carmy haven’t done “the thing” they both agreed to in the alley in S1. Or even what they agreed to under the table. Not all the way yet. Which is where S4 is headed. It’s the place left for them to go that requires the real emotional commitment and vulnerability.

Syd doesn’t just need Carmy’s collaboration on dishes, or even his full focus (she got a version of that in S3 which sucked big-time). She needs to feel safe opening up to him about what she wants from him as a partner. She’s going to have to give up ignoring her needs and prioritizing everyone else.

While it’s obvious to everyone Carmy needs Syd when it comes to running the restaurant, he definitely needs to show up for her emotionally and not just keep making it about himself. Which the show tells us he already knows he has to get right with everyone - clean up his side of the street.

Them listening and looking at each other up close is the thing that they’re both afraid to do. Syd making the margins wider but not telling him her real feelings is nice, as Carmy says, but not the truth of her.

Which, it is going to be messy, because they’re not on the same page right now.

[lecham1644]

hollywood get to work because i’m not living in a world where these two don’t play a couple

[lecham1644]

click, click, click, click

[lecham1644]

I cannot get over how u have this great dynamic between two leads but to combat more focus on that blossoming , whether deeply platonic or romantic, u throw in a random white girl

[lecham1644]

[lecham1644]

you're my renaissance

aka carmy is determined to get sydney tickets to the renaissance world tour. so determined he asks the restaurant crew to help him out. or as of chapter 2, sydney and carmy going to atlanta to enjoy said world tour together :')

(right okay so lot of this was written in what has been quite a dark and isolating time in my life not gonna lie. but we keep singing and we keep dancing if it brings joy! which ironically is what i think renaissance as an album is all about. all this to say that i know this is niche and weird and unedited but i do hope that if you read it, you can find something to smile at because we all need smiles and laughter and yeah. love you)

[lecham1644]

The Unspeakable Four

Chapter 5

Summary:

Stella texts Sydney a link to a live stream of their night in Austin and Sydney sets it up to display on the tv in her office. She’s reading over contracts and collaborations. An invite to Paris fashion week, an appearance on Jennifer Hudson, a Netflix reality competition, most of which she skims over and bookmarks for later. She watches her husband, daughter, and best friend efficiently service a crowd of thousands in Texas and her chest feels with nostalgia and longing. She notices Stella’s little chef coat and the adorableness of it almost brings her to her knees. She pulls up a search tab and starts looking for something specific. She takes notes and sends links to her lawyer. When she finishes she pulls out the paperwork in the bottom of her drawer. Her divorce agreement, that for three years, has remained unsigned. Sydney Adamu Berzatto vs. Carmen Anthony Berzatto Tear drops fall onto the paper and smear the ink.

Notes:

this one takes a turn! please enjoy it deeply!

[lecham1644]

Sometimes, late at night or in the early morning, a thought about The Bear pops into my brain. And it's something that we've screamed about a hundred times before, but it makes me crazy!!!!!

So in season 1, Sydney tells Marcus during the first their "breakup" that Carmy made the best meal she's EVER had. At the end of the episode, they reconcile with Carmy extending his most cherished dream to share with her. Then, in season 3, ep.1, is about Carmy finding himself and losing himself. We cut back and forth from the present aftermath of Friends and Family to his culinary journey, ending with him sending his heart out on a plate. The FINAL scene of this hero's capsule episode is Sydney eating said heart. And it's her favorite. Yeah, yeah, yeah, this is supposed to be a work relationship. A platonic partnership. Also, Sydney is not a central component of Carmy's purpose. Nope. She's just part of the ensemble. Carmy's metaphorical SOUL being consumed by Sydney, her seeking him out post Sheridan because she couldn't get that it out of her mind, him STILL not knowing that she ate it, and them starting a restaurant together where he offers her and only her out of all the staff a partnership agreement...And the final shot of Sydney in S3 is of her having a panic attack. This was mirroring Carmy just when he's had a breakthrough. It signaled that it's his turn to be there for HER. But nope. We're delusional. This is a simple work family show that accidentally told a soulmate story.

[lecham1644]

part one: marketing bears!!

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(soc med au inspired by: @thebearsoc & @miredball (as well as the fak comment!!)

[lecham1644]

sydcarmy au: formula 1 edition

(chapter 3) 🏁

pls have a read and let me know your thoughts!!

[lecham1644]

Valentine's Day

[lecham1644]

they make me SICK

[lecham1644]

Yahweh, Jesus, Lord, God above, please bring my family back together.