jeff-the-gnome-king

[jeff-the-gnome-king]

We call this “Kraken Enrichment” 🐙🚤

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the way ivan aivazovsky looks at the sea…i think…i think that’s what love looks like.

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"BUT I KNOW WE'LL MEET AGAIN SOME SUNNY DAY"

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do you guys remember when we used to say oh worm all the time. remember that

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i am so absolutely utterly scared that my insane grandfather in his 80s who runs miles every morning is going to leave me a bird in his will and i am especially scared he is going to leave me a large cockatoo named "captain hook". hook has been trying to make me his child bride since i was like 6 years old and every time i see him again which has only been a couple times with decades in between hook is like "you. it's always been you. ever since you were born i've known we were meant to be" captain hook you are a bird and i am a LESBIAN and i don't WANT an eternal sentinel captain HOOK!!!!!!!

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Waiting for his turn

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Watershed by Ciruelo Cabral

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I could not not share this.

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“My berries cluster black and thick

For rich and poor alike to pick.

I’ll tear your dress, and cling, and tease

And scratch your hands and arms and knees.

I’ll stain your fingers and your face,

And then I’ll laugh at your disgrace.

But when the bramble-jelly’s made,

You’ll find your trouble well repaid.”

~The Blackberry Fairy, Cicely Mary Barker

Thought I’d posted the finished one, but apparently not.

[jeff-the-gnome-king]

"Pay for our labor that you wasted with some labor of your own."

Comes the calmly serious reply from the little fae king,

"And on your legs, the walk is an easy ten....twenty minutes into the trees? C'mon, the sooner we do this the sooner you can get back to whatever it was you were doing directing that mechanical creature around."

Jeff mutters, motioning at Stan's car with dismissal.

“You really need to understand that I didn’t mean to hit you with my car. I couldn’t see you over the hood I swear!”

"You didn't hit ME, you idiot! You hit our harvest!" The angry gnome gestures to the giant pumpkin that now lay smashed to pieces on the ground.

"We were going to make so much pie outta that!"

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"Why would I mind?! It's great to have friends of the gnomes over to celebrate the winter season!"

Jeff says brightly, and unspoken cue going off as more gnomes walked forward to fill in the space. Some stayed back like Moon, while others moved more forward and sniffed excitedly. Obviously smelling the pie and pineapple.

"You just caught us at the end of some foraging and on the way back home, so good timing."

It would be a long time before Adara crossed paths with Jeff again.

To be fair, she hadn't meant for time to get away from her. But, there was that whole, ending up on another planet thing, actually making children on that planet, and finding a way back to Earth. And, even after that, there was the time raising those children up past infanthood before she'd got the chance to take the trip in the first place.

--There was no way Adara was letting Mars loose on a colony of gnomes until she'd learned a little restraint when picking up small things.

Today, the snow fell between gaps in ancient oaks, and three people trudged along in winter clothing: Adara and two smaller girls who'd never been here before.

"I think we're almost here." The flame woman encouraged.

The smallest of the two piped up. "You sure you're know where you're going, Mama? I don't want it to be like in, Christmas Vacation, and we all get frozen from the waist down."

"We're not gonna freeze, Moon. Mars, you still got the pineapple?"

"Uh huh." Mars held up the fruit proudly. "How come we're bringing a pineaple to the middle of the forest?"

"Well, pineapples have always been a sign of hospitality, and the friend we're visiting hasn't seen me in..." Adara paused. "Quite awhile. Maybe too long."

"Long enough for him to be mad?"

"I don't know. I just...wanted to bring something nice, but unusual."

Moon glaced down at the object in her own arms. "What about this pie?"

"That's for all of us."

Luckily, the smells of exotic fruit and fresh pie were more than enough to catch the attention of sensitive noses. Much like cats, gnomes can scope a scene while deeply hidden in the foilage and not be detected.

The adult woman was recognized quickly and word sent out back to the still acting King of the Gnomes. It would be a few minutes but soon enough Jeff got there, and couldn't help the smile on his face when he saw her. He was quick to pop out of the foliage and into plain view, a few other gnomes flanking him.

"Well, well! Look who it is! Adara! Where did you wander off to?!"

He laughs, head tilting slightly as he noticed the children with her. Hardly blinking at the fact they were hardly as human as their mother.

"Ah! You've had a litter I see! Mazel Tov!"

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