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not dead, not alive, some secret third thing: sleep deprived
#dawgs I have barely slept in these past few days#I dipped from thmblr without realizing because I didn’t even know I haven’t been active in a day#my sense of time is scrambled I’m so sorry#I’m okay I promise life is just chaos#<3#lucas rants#lucas vents#?#sleep deprived#slept uhhh like 7 hours max in the past week#we live we laugh we love#(we changed medications)#clearly will need a new change#do not be like me pls /Gen
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tattoo inspired by How to Dance in Ohio, sorta!
three of my instructors were involved with the show (Jacob Yandura - composer, Carlos Encinias - Kurt/Rick/Hawkins, and Paul Canaan - co-producer) and I’ve worked with these three since 2019 through a theatre camp they help run!
a ‘second chance dance’ is commonly used to refer to an event that can be held in different community spaces for all individuals who felt like they did not go to their formal dances as their authentic selves.
this theatre camp was the first (and only, at the time) place where I could be called by my name & pronouns. where I could be my authentic self. they were the most supportive community that I could ever wish for.
they genuinely saved my life by showing me there is a world outside of close-minded small towns like the one I live in. a place where someone like me (a queer neurodivergent person of color) could be celebrated instead of shamed/harassed.
the musical itself is so beautiful and gorgeous and I 100% recommend listening to it!! I had tickets to see it but then it closed before my trip to nyc :( but it is so, so wonderful.
taken from the lyrics, “we all deserve a second chance; so welcome to the second chance dance!”, I was able to get each of their handwriting for one of the words.
when in need of community/support, they are who I think of. so grateful to have a beautiful tattoo dedicated to that and the amazing musical they were a part of!! HTDIO bringing actually autistic actors onto Broadway? fucking win. seeing such a gender diverse cast also has me <3333 HTDIO I love u
#how to dance in ohio#htdio#htdio musical#would y’all want HTDIO fanart#I have it#uh uhhhh#carlos l. encinias#jacob yandura#paul canaan#building momentum#building momentum (reprise)#technically#musical theatre#musicals#broadway#paul wrote ‘second’#jacob wrote ‘chance’#carlos wrote ‘dance <3’#carlos luis encinias THE FATHER FIGURE YOU ARE#he is so dad core#he called me kiddo despite me being a literal adult and yes I cried about it#he’s my fav#lucas rants#tattoo#tattoos
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my offering for House MD tumblr, brought to you by my friend (who doesn’t watch House)
what does this mean abt me guys :(
#is it because I’m a writing major#or went to rehab#or am queer#/lh I love her this made me giggle#but also#house md fans what do we think#house md#gregory house#james wilson#hate crimes md#dr house#dr wilson#lisa cuddy#dr cuddy#hilson#huddy#just trying to attract the house md ppl sorry gang#robert sean leonard#hugh laurie#lisa edelstein#the ducklings#robert chase#allison cameron#eric foreman#remy thirteen hadley#chris taub
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returning from the dead (mental health break) to say I am thriving because I have 20 days until move in‼️ celebrating with a special tattoo appt today
also two days ago was my one year milestone of recovery :)
#mental health break was all safe and was not at risk#was just overwhelmed with politics + the emotions coming up with my one year#so now that my one year has passed I feel chill to be back#sorry for disappearing#:(#literally thriving lately tho so#Not totally sorry?#lucas rants
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two days back on T and got my snakebites pierced, hell yeah
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for the Obama Killed My Doctor thing
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Wilson is so silly <3333
the way wilson is only ever this expressive around house
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testosterone will not be ready until the 20th…………..
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day four without T… begging my insurance has gotten their shit together by tomorrow or else I’ll lose it
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day three without my testosterone and begging my insurance to get their shit togetehr because I’ve never felt so dysphoric in my life holy shit!!
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oh boy! I sure do love his smile and how happy he is! I really hope that doesn’t change! (/sar)
our upscaled image of Neil Perry (Robert Sean Leonard) smiling in the hallway towards the beginning of Dead Poets Society (1989)
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pov its 2004 you’re mysteriously dying and a bunch of people you didn’t know were treating you are about to judge you to shreds
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chase being the only fellow to enjoy this is So funny he looks so cute
everyone else (besides house) is fearing for their life and hes just all like :D
i love him
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me in therapy today: “yeah so anyways life is really good right now, better than I’ve felt in a long time. I think with my coping skills, it would take a lot to bring my mood down!”
dysphoria blues striking at midnight: lemme prove them wrong
#I basically jinxed myself#Lucas vents#therapy#transgender#non-binary#trans hrt#dysphoria#gender dysphoria#tw dysphoria#non-binary but also a man who smooches men but all of them probably see me as a woman!!!!
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