incorrectmccallpack

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Scott: Well, you know what they say. When life gives you lemons...

Allison: Put them in a face mask?

Lydia: Use them in a battery.

Isaac: Throw them at people.

Stiles: Squirt the juice in life's eyes. Steal life's wallet and assume life's identity. Now you're life and hold dominion over all. Your enemies cower at your feet.

Scott: ...make lemonade, guys. The answer was make lemonade.

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Isaac: Allison kind of came on to me.

Stiles: I didn’t know Allison was into fancy little porcelain doll men.

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Lydia: We both look very beautiful tonight.

Allison: You know, if you- if you’d just said I look beautiful, I would’ve said “so do you”.

Lydia: I couldn’t take that chance.

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Stiles: Bad News: Coach Finstock locked his keys inside the building.

Stiles: Good News: We didn't have to wait around for a locksmith.

Stiles: Bad News: Coach finds it very concerning that I know how to pick locks, and tried to unlock my tragic backstory. I was too embarrassed to admit that the reason I learned was because, at thirteen, I figured that was the kind of skill that would impress cute girls.

Stiles: Good News: A cute girl saw me do it.

Stiles: Bad News: It was Allison, and since she's already seen me fall out of several trees, cry because I saw a fawn that was just too damn small, and knows I can ride a unicycle, she'll never think I'm cool no matter what I do. It's too late. She knows.

Scott: There are million dollar blockbuster movies that are less entertaining than the roller coaster you just took me on.

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Derek: Where’s Boyd?

Isaac: I don’t know. He left.

Derek: What? Why?

Isaac: We were watching Spongebob, and he stood up and said “life is too short” and walked out.

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Scott: You were stabbed. Do you remember anything?

Stiles: Only the ambulance ride to the hospital.

Scott: That wasn’t an ambulance. I carried you.

Stiles: But I heard a siren.

Scott: That was Lydia.

Lydia: I’m sorry, I got nervous.

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Allison: I have to go talk to Scott and Isaac.

Chris: Yes, please. Tell your boyfriend and his boyfriend that playtime is over.

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Sheriff Stilinski: You’re gay?

Stiles:

Sheriff Stilinski: I mean, if I found out you were being prosecuted I would’ve said “sure”, but this? I'm shocked.

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Lydia: We were helping Allison write her vows, but she kicked us out because Stiles kept making inappropriate suggestions.

Stiles: How is “Scott, I love your sweet ass” inappropriate?

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Derek: Why would you think any part of this plan was a good idea?

Peter: Probably because I'm a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence.

Derek: Oh.

Peter: I don't understand how you keep forgetting that.

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Boyd: So, how long have you and Scott been dating?

Isaac: Who- no! What? Th-that’s… uh-uh. That’s not… why would you…

Isaac: How did you know?

Boyd: You just seem really happy for the first time in a while.

Issac: [Touched]

Boyd: I’m playing, man. I saw you guys making out in the parking lot last week. Congratulations though.

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Stiles: I have "edge".

Lydia: You really don’t. You are literally the most wide-eyed person I’ve ever seen. You have the face of a cartoon lamb.

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Stiles: Are we really going to let Derek keep Jackson?

Scott: We kept Isaac.

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Peter: Empty altruism will not save you now. Any last words?

Scott: Yes. What’s altruism?

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Stiles, brushing his teeth in Scott’s kitchen sink: Good morning.

Scott: When did you get here?

Stiles: I spent the night.

Scott: But I remember you leaving before I went to bed. You said, “good night, I'm going home” and then you left.

Stiles: Yeah, but then, on my way out, I tripped and fell down the stairs.

Scott: Oh my god, were you hurt?

Stiles: Nah, I just didn't feel like getting up, so I slept on the floor.

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Lydia: I can’t believe you and Allison broke the bed last night!

Stiles: Must have been a wild night.

Scott: Haha… Yeah…

[last night]

Scott: Bet you can’t jump high enough to touch the ceiling!

Allison: Try me.

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Derek: I'm Isaac's emergency contact.

Melissa: So you're here to pick him up?

Derek: I'm here to be removed as his emergency contact.