goodgrlguides

[goodgrlguides]

Making the first move is never a weakness, it's a sign of strategy and commitment. Never be afraid to make the move, just make sure you're cautious every step of the way and pick up on their reactions to your actions.

[goodgrlguides]

Never be afraid of failure. It's one of the most beautifully painful processes in life and one that is the most beneficial despite how difficult it feels to go through it. Learn from it and remember that despite the results of your actions, you are not a failure and never will be.

[goodgrlguides]

A Good Girl's Guide to being Eye-catching and Mysterious

͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐎𝐍𝐄 : 𝐁𝐄𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐘𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒

𝐈. Theres this fatal problem with a majority of the aspiring mysterious girls. As one who used to have this problem, it comes naturally. Every. Time. It's completely normal to have that reaction as we're not built like that as humans, especially when you want to be liked and enjoy attention. Let me stop going in circles and actually tell you what the problem is.

We find it difficult to be detached.

In every friendship and relationship etc., it's hard to not pour out our whole heart to someone who you think is right for you because you've clicked once or twice in a conversation. But that's actually not the case.

Now, being detached doesn't mean that you have to ignore the person you're building a relationship with. It means that you still have a part of you left for you when giving them a piece of your heart day by day. Which leads me to step one to being mysterious.

Always leave a bit of your heart that you can fall back into while still in the trusting and building period.

Don't tell them everything when you think you trust them. You have to know that you trust them to be able to feel safe enough to give out your whole heart. And knowing isn't just head knowledge, you actually feel it with your whole soul and being.

𝐈𝐈. This also doesn't encourage having trust issues in any way, but it's making sure that your heart is prepared to invite a third person into it. It's sensitive, no matter how much you feel like you don't care, so you always need to know that you trust the person before allowing them in. The second step to being mysterious is:

Don't overshare.

It's that simple honestly. Think before you speak to see whether you can trust the person with that knowledge and test how they react to you and your experiences. Obviously, everyone is going to react differently, but if you really want a circle that can understand you, wait for the right time and see if they actually care about how you're feeling or how you felt. The following step is your ultimate guideline to knowing when to overshare and where your relationship stands.

Understand the tiers to friendship.

In a friendship, there's first acquaintances. This is someone that your acquainted with but not really sure about. A similar relationship is like greeting your neighbors every so often and having a conversation with them. This means do not overshare. They honestly have nothing to do with your information and it's just going to have your word vomit wafting in their heads.

Then, there's associates. This is when you're well acquainted with someone, and you speak to often enough to laugh with. This is someone that can't be trusted yet. As rosy as it sounds to laugh with them or even have an inside joke with them, they are not the right people for the heart-to-heart you are looking for. Test the waters and see how they react. If they still don't react well, keep to yourself and wait for the relationship to develop more before you try again. Associates don't mean that they have no chance at being your friend, but it means that you're still in the growing period.

Friends come next. This isn't the highest tear surprisingly. To spot a friend, you know that you're close to them and you're able to relate and understand to them in emotional aspects and mental aspects. This means that you guys are close, but not extremely close. You could share problems, share selective bits of trauma etc., but not everything, because you need to make sure that you still keep something to fall back into.

Lastly there are best friends. These are your ride or dies. These sorts of people won't judge you based on your trauma and experiences. You can trust their judgements and their loyalty for you which is almost natural that you reciprocate back.

I honestly don't know how I got here, but I feel like a lot of people need to protect their hearts from pain from trusting someone too quickly in a relationship and end up feeling like they are the problem. If you feel like that, you are not the problem. Learn from your actions and do your best to be more cautious with what you share and who you share it with.

𝐈𝐈𝐈. Finally, be intentional with your actions. This means that you should flirt with life and the people around you. This doesn't translate to you walking up to someone and flirting suddenly. It means that when you find someone looking at you, stare back at them for a beat, smile for a beat and then look away.

And if they don't stop looking at you, pretend you don't notice it. This leaves an image in their minds of a girl that fed into their interest once and didn't look back at them again and if the person is dedicated enough, they'll go up and talk to you.

This also doesn't mean that you should play with people's feelings, but more or less snare them into your orbit and see if they'll make a move. However, if you are interested in them, it'll never hurt to make the first move but still be careful with what you say and how you say it. If you're trying to flirt, hold eye contact or tap their arm/hand softly when you're laughing or trying to get their attention. Make it subtle but enough to intrigue.

͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏ ͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏ ͏𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐖𝐎 : 𝐁𝐄𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐄𝐘𝐄-𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆

𝐈. Now that we know how to be mysterious, we'll work on her twin which is being eye-catching. Mystery and confidence work hand in hand in catching people's eye, which brings me to the first step.

Build your confidence.

Confidence is what catches people's eye. They watch the way you walk. The way you talk. The way you carry yourself. How you react to the people around you. Believe it or not, people actually do notice a lot about you and the key to using that to your advantage is inserting confidence in the way you do things.

Confidence is a mindset and can easily be built through affirmations and manipulating your mind to believe it, even if you don't feel like it.

Manipulate your mind through your words and actions.

This doesn't mean that you're taking advantage of your mind, but what it translates to, is that force your reactions to your mistakes to be more uplifting rather than destructive. For example, whenever I make a mistake or do something I would've deemed as 'stupid' before, I combat it by saying, "That was a mistake I can learn from" or I say something along the lines of, "I'm so smart".

𝐈𝐈. In summary, the tip to being eye-catching is all about the way you carry yourself (outwardly and inwardly) and being intentional every step of the way. It's important to carry that confidence with you throughout, to be able to manifest the aura you want to carry. Below are some practical and easy tips you can follow to build confidence and carry the eye-catching aura you want.

Outwardly : Dress nicely (to your own standards of course), brush your hair or change up its style, make sure your nails are clean with or without nail polish, practice walking like a model, get better posture and practice your smile in the mirror and replicate that smile when you're outdoors.

Inwardly : Practice your daily affirmations on your looks, stop putting yourself down, act confident even if you don't feel confident, listen to music that carries the vibe of the aura you want to go for constantly, speak positively and use ChatGPT to make you a personalized list of things you can do or say constantly to grow your inner confidence.

Well, that was a lot, but I reallyy hope it helps you to be the best version of yourself as possible! As always, it was a pleasure having you here and remember: be a good girl.

Love, The Good Girl Guides.

[goodgrlguides]

A man who expresses exactly how much he likes you and shows it. A man who shares his thoughts with you and values your time, trust and company. A man who appreciates your hard work. A man who showers you with your love language and relishes in your happiness. A man who thanks you for the littlest things. A man who is wholeheartedly in love with you and is devoted to you. A man who sees you for you. A man who listens when you talk. A man who you can have conversations with. A man who understands every part of you—emotionally and physically. A man who you can have a good laugh with. A man who is romantic. A man who works hard and accomplishes his goals. A man who isn't just a dreamer, but a doer. A man who cares for his family. A man who is the perfect husband, companion, father and friend, and ultimately the man we should be aiming for. Never settle for less.

[goodgrlguides]

You deserve a man who makes it obvious he wants you in his life even after he has you in his life. One who always includes you and doesn’t shy away from making you apart of his mind, his thoughts, his businesses and his emotions. That’s the man we are aiming for.

[goodgrlguides]

A Good Girl's Guide to Mastering the Art of Subtle Manipulation

(aka. getting what you want without a cost)

𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐔𝐄. I have this thing that I always do with my dad that gets me whatever I want, whenever I want it. It's called subtle manipulation.

𝐈. When you're with a man you want to get something from, make him feel strong. In other words, butter him up. Men are known for falling for the trap of flaunting their strength in front of women to make them feel like they're strong or needed. It works every time. Say I want to buy a pair of tights, and my dad is around. I usually don't say a thing and walk into the store, pick up the item I want and wait until the till when he brings out his card and pays for it for me. Typically, I deny it about twice, but he keeps repeating it and tells me to get anything else I want.

As a disclaimer, this doesn't work with every man, so you need to find out what works for him. This silent action of wanting to be independent usually makes a man (typically a father) feel like their kid is leaving them and buying what they want to buy with their own money makes them feel like they're still in control.

Or maybe beforehand, try praising him for how well he parked or chat to him about something he's good at and how much you want to learn how to do it (even if you actually don't). Generally, letting a person talk about their strengths puts them in a better mood, which is essential in trying to get what you want easily.

Give him that 'tight pickle jar' or that 'soda bottle', even if you're more than capable of opening it yourself. Struggle a bit and then call him over and watch his face light up with pride at how easy it was to open the jar or the bottle. It's good to build him up. At the same time, it's also good to be as smooth about it as possible.

𝐈𝐈. Be as smooth and as nonchalant with it as possible. Don't start out worrying about it, just act like you normally would with a little more 'helpless' or 'independent' to it, depending on what you choose for the day. After buttering him up, it'll definitely be much easier to get what you want and adding what you know will rile up that manliness in him will make it so much better.

To break it down easily:

Helpless — Triggers an emotional need to protect. Not in a very nurturing way depending on the man, but in a way where they see that they're the man and need to help you. ㅤㅤUseful traits to act helpless — Be a bit pouty, act a little more ㅤㅤcuter than you usually would, talk about his likes a bit moreㅤㅤㅤact like you need his help, butter him up, give him what he ㅤㅤlikes.

Independent — Triggers a threatening feeling that they're not as useful in your life anymore. This works at least 80% of the time. Men surprisingly feel easily intimidated at a lot of the things that come into a women's life and one of those includes an independent woman if the man himself has insecurity issues and easily feels threatened, which is what my dad has. It's said a lot: A strong woman needs a strong man. So, if your man isn't strong then this will work very easily. ㅤㅤUseful traits to act independent — It's one simple rule, don't ㅤㅤask him for it, do it yourself. He'll eventually fall for it.

Obviously, there are millions of other ways you could act, but these are just ones that work for me, so if you need someone to blame if this doesn't work for you, don't blame me! 💢

𝐈𝐈𝐈. Another one bites the dust. Another way to say this is, be unapologetic with it. That confidence in yourself is what makes this entire process easier so that you don't have to feel awkward and uncomfortable during the process! Trust the process and continue to be headstrong with it and eventually it'll get a lot easier, and you'll end up getting what you want when you want it.

As a final disclaimer, just know that none of this is belittling men or women in any way, practical tips to get what you want without spending too much over it. Don't do this and then start saying that I was the one who made it toxic and it didn't work because of me because at the end of the day, every person is different so do what you know works for him as much as it works for you.

As always, it's lovely having you guys here and I really love having the opportunity to share things with other women who are so deserving and so loved— even if no one tells you that you're loved and that you're beautiful, here you go: I love you so much and you're beautiful and so so deserving of all the love the right person has to give to you!

Love you lots and as always, Be a good girl.

XOXO, GGG.

[goodgrlguides]

A Good Girl's Guide to Productive Time Wasting

𝐈. Ever scrolled through your phone and realised that you had scrolled your hours away on things you're most likely to forget? I bet you thought that you were going to spend your time productively, but your actions thought otherwise. Coming from someone who wasted a whole year trying to find friendship and trying to be loved until I realised that I was the one who needed to love myself first. But that's a story for another day. The main reason why I resurrected myself from an unplanned hiatus, was to give a perfect guide to wasting your time effectively when you don't want to work.

𝐈𝐈. Basic steps to effective time wasting:

Find an actual hobby - I don't mean one. And I don't mean two. I mean multiple. Actually realise that a hobby doesn't have to be something that you're good at, but more of something that you enjoy doing. This helps you waste time in a way that actually trains your brain instead of wasting your brain. ㅤㅤ▷ Read a book (not just classics dw) ㅤㅤ▷ Go outside and plant (have fun with it, give them names, grab a friend to do it with) ㅤㅤ▷ Plan your future life and elaborate. Go into every detail ㅤㅤ▷ Chat to GPT (it's sounds crazy but that's girlhood) ㅤㅤ▷ Paint by number or; ㅤㅤ▷ Practice mindfulness through art (One of my teachers taught me how to do this and I realised how much of a difference in my daily routine) ㅤㅤ▷ Go on a walk/run ㅤㅤ▷ Sit in the sun for fun (with sunscreen!) ㅤㅤ▷ Try journalling or decorating your journals ㅤㅤ▷ Take pictures or random videos of things around you ㅤㅤ▷ Sit and stare The last one sounds pretty direct, but it'll actually get you to think instead of drowning in content.

Listen to music - This sounds like a hobby, but it isn't. If you enjoy music, this will help you take your mind off of everything. Have a comfort playlist or a playlist of how you want to feel. Give them names that aren't too distracting so that you don't end up getting distracted by other things or forgetting what the playlist is for. The key tip here, is to listen and do nothing. Just listen to the lyrics. Listen to the different beat drops or the change of tones. It sounds boring but really immerse yourself in it and remember why you liked the song in the first place.

Breathe - This one won't waste much of your time, don't worry. Sit down in an empty space with you alone, close your eyes and breathe in through your stomach and breathe out through your nose, holding in your breath for three seconds. While you breathe, think. Take control over your thoughts and actually think about what you would think about without the distraction of devices.

𝐈𝐈𝐈. Practice mindfulness. I'm not kidding when I'm stressing this. Honestly, I just realised that I don't actually exhale as often as I inhale. My body is so tense for absolutely no reason, so take a moment to see how your body is right now. Are your brows furrowed for no reason? Are your shoulders up and tense? This body language not only influences your posture, but it also how stiff you are on a daily basis.

A practical way to practice this is getting a piece of paper, an eraser or small marble of some sort and pen or pencil. Dribble it on the paper with your pen and while you focus, remember to inhale and exhale, grounding yourself and completely relaxing without thinking of anything besides the lines your paper is making. Do this at least once a week or when you're feeling like you need something to do, instead of bringing out your phone and doomscrolling.

𝐈𝐕. Doomscrolling isn't the end. It's just the road that leads to the end. At the end of the day, scrolling isn't helping you, but only giving you a finger ache, neck pain and eye strain which isn't beneficial for you at all. If you are addicted to doomscrolling, don't worry, you're fine. All you need is some actual activities that will interest you and hook you on enough for you to be interested.

For a little disclaimer, always be careful what you take in on the internet. A lot of it is people just spewing out nonsense from their biased opinion on everything, so make sure that you don't take any of it to heart, especially when it has something to do with insecurities etc. So make sure you do the right things and get out of your doomscrolling habits become addicted to healthier things! 💢

As always, it was lovely having you here my loves and I hope you've really learnt something from this! If you guys ever need someone to chat to for advice or just anything, feel free to message me and I promise to do my best to be active on this thing and stop abandoning it!

Love you lots and as always, Be a good girl.

XOXO, GGG.

[goodgrlguides]

Don't demonize your negative emotions. Learn from them and embrace them however way you want to. That's one of the ways you learn to grow.

[goodgrlguides]

A Good Girl's Guide to Building Confidence

I'm sure maybe once in our life, we've listened to or heard 'What makes you beautiful' by One direction where they talk about their crush's insecurities and whatnot and how they are still beautiful, but we need to understand that insecurities are not beautiful. This doesn't mean that having insecurities is like a grave sin, we've all had them, but this should not be romantisied. Sure, we might not like our body shape, or figure, or hair texture, but making it authentic and look beautiful is up to you. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but confidence will elevate that.

Understand that confidence is a mindset. So is ugliness. If you go around believing that you're so ugly and that nobody wants you, eventually that will start manifesting in your outward appearance and through the way you act. People will eventually see you differently through the way you portray yourself. On the other hand, if you go around believing that you are beautiful, that everybody wants you and that when you enter the room, you are the main character, people will eventually adapt to that. They will begin to see confidence through the way you are and automatically see you differently.

Confidence is influential. Think of the great leaders of the world, dead or alive, their influence is empowered by confidence. If you don't have the confidence to believe and trust in your abilities, everyone will take you for a fool. People are attracted to confident people. They feel your energy and find you alluring and want to be around you more to know how you're like this. Be the Vixen. Be the Venus. Stand out.

Confidence is knowing who you are and what you stand for. I notice that a lot of people always struggle with building boundaries without losing your loved one, but one of the main things that make this difficult for some is that they don't have the confidence to speak up. Know what you want and speak up for yourself. Even if you're shaking like a leaf while you speak, explain calmly and feel proud that you placed boundaries in that relationship. No one can come into your space unless you allow them to, which is why it is so important to get to a stage of understanding yourself and how far you'll let people go.

Cultivate the model mindset. A majority of models aren't seen glancing around nervously when they walk down the runway. One of the first few steps to becoming a model is to know your confidence and walk it out. Be bold with your actions and appearance and you'll end up with the model effect.

To go along with this post, I am creating a free Confidence Building Workbook that will be released shortly after this post. If you have any queries, please feel free to message me.

One more announcement, I am conducting research for a magazine that will be published around May of this year, so if you have any queries about romance, friendship etc, please send me an ask with your question and your name (unless you want to be anonymous) so that we will be able to answer your questions diligently.

As always, it was lovely having you and remember, be a good girl.

XOXO, Good Girl Guides.

[goodgrlguides]

Before you get someone to be your valentine and call you their pretty girl or their goddess, become your own valentine. Treat yourself like how you would want your loved one to treat you. It might sound weird at first but call yourself a pretty girl. Call yourself a goddess. Make the most of valentine's day alone and cherish yourself. And remember that valentine's day is not just a one day 'I love myself and others' trend, everyday should be valentine's day. Treat everyone with love on all days, not just on occasions.

From me to you, I sincerely which all of you a happy valentine's day and I want to let you all know that each and every one of you is worth it. I love you, good girls! xx

[goodgrlguides]

Dress without shame. It is no one's business to judge you based on what you are wearing. The main point about wearing clothes is making sure you feel good in them. If you feel good wearing your clothes, wear them. Don't let anyone make you lose your style because of their judgement. Of course, you may eventually regret what you wore before, but that's for yourself to do, not for others to do.

[goodgrlguides]

I've noticed a lot of people were confused about the meaning of the name 'Good Girl Guides'. In absolutely no way was it ever made to be a derogatory phrase since this page is clearly made by a woman, and it is also not about being an obedient pet. The Good Girl Guides' name was inspired by my dreams of becoming a better woman, not necessarily an obedient follower. Being good doesn't mean that you don't have an opinion, it's about being good to those around you or being a good person.

The overall goal of the Good Girl Guides is to help women become better women in this society, not to be a 'good girl' follower, but to be a good girl leader.

[goodgrlguides]

A Good Girl's Guide to Getting Over Rejection and Belittling

Where you are is not where you will remain.

Starting off, we of course need to be willing to fix and change the problem but remember that where you are right now, is not where you will remain. Having that hope will also push you forward and give you motivation to move on. Rejection is never something that should be taken lightly.

When you are ready, start working on yourself.

You can never suddenly just start changing, especially if you grew up feeling rejected and belittled. When you are ready, you can begin working and fixing the problems in your life. But never use that as an excuse to never get around to the problem. When you're ready has nothing to with feeling ready, it's about understanding that where you are isn't right and wanting to change that, even if it hurts.

Recognise that you are never the problem.

People reject others for countless reasons that include lack of responsibility or hatred which is a problem from within themselves. If you were rejected by someone, know that it is not your fault and that not everyone sees you the way that twisted person must have seen you. Know your self-worth. Have confidence in who you are. Have confidence in who you will be if you are still working on yourself.

Never seek validation in people.

A common mistake that a lot of people who were rejected make is that they look for validation in people or things and that is completely normal. It's normal, but it should not be a place you stay in. Never try to make people like you or try to make yourself popular, you'll never benefit from that and end up sadder and more rejected than before. Remember that a person's praise only lasts for so long and it can take even one humanly mistake for the person to change how they see you. People can sense when someone is desperate for something, and it instantly puts them off. Grow yourself, instead of trying to gain attention from people that will eventually see you as a hassle and drop you easily.

Never fall into the wrong places and make yourself vulnerable because of rejection.

People easily find that being rejected makes them vulnerable, but that really should not be the case. I've experienced rejection a numerous number of times, even if it wasn't from people alone, and that had made me build up trust issues and put up a wall whenever I'd talk to someone I didn't trust. I still struggle a lot with trusting people, but I recognise that I was not meant to be in this place of constant defense mode. What really is most important is to not fall into the wrong addictions and circles and using rejection as an excuse. Nothing can ever be an excuse for stupid decisions. Trust me, it's much harder to shake off addictions, than it is to shake off rejection.

Build an immunity to belittling and control your reactions.

Recently, a figure in my life has been constantly trying to belittle me in any case they can find. I figured in moment like this, control your reactions and don't let your irritation show on your face. That puts you in a vulnerable position and people like that grow on the vulnerability and embarrassment. Keep calm and answer them accordingly without starting unnecessary fights and disagreements.

As always, it was a pleasure having you and remember: Be a good girl.

XOXO, Good Girl Guides.

[goodgrlguides]

In any case, be like a tiger. Hide your claws and only use them when necessary. I learnt this hack surprisingly from an animal fact card I used to collect when I was a kid. Never show people you don't trust the real you. Cherish it and show it to people you cherish.

[goodgrlguides]

A Good Girl's Guide to Knowing your Self-Worth

You are never and never will be a burden. You need to get it into your head that whatever you do and whatever people tell you, you are not a burden. I've figured through many years of living with parents that do their best but never find that financial stability when it comes to the important things like buying things your children desire, but for buying for others and events, they always have an overflow of money. This thought of being burden originally came to me through all the experiences that made me age faster than I was supposed to and made me feel as though if I asked for anything, I'd immediately be at fault because I'd be like a liability in their lives. It took me a very long time to realise that I am not a burden, nor a liability. Wanting things and asking for things should not be seen as being a burden to your parents, no matter how long it takes for you to get used to it. I still struggle to ask my parents for things and prefer having a steady income and independence so that I can buy and give everything that my inner child ever wanted. Speaking of which, make sure to continually nurture your inner child. In any case where someone feels like they grew up too fast, their inner child is still crying for the attention and the things that you wanted when you were that child, so make sure to take care of her/him and even when you're lacking energy and motivation, use her/him as a point of contact and remember that your inner child needs to be satisfied and healed in order for you to become a better person. On one last note, never ever let people belittle you or make you feel less-than because of how you look, act or even your age. You were made perfectly in the image of God at the right place, time and to the right parents—even if your parents cause you a lot of pain. That pain is meant to grow you, not destroy you. Every trial in your life is a lesson, and that trial will keep repeating itself until you face it. Face what you fear and that fear will turn into courage, even if you face it with your hands and voice shaking, eventually the fear will break off and the courage will replace it.

As always, it was lovely having you and remember, be a good girl.

XOXO, Good Girl Guides.

[goodgrlguides]

The way you grow up genuinely affects you. However you grew up will direct the way you think, the way you act, the way you respond and the way you react. But that shouldn't be an excuse to act however you want. Break off the cycle and change. If you got emotionally abused during your childhood, recognize and pinpoint how it's still affecting you now. When you notice that, do your best to change. Change always hurts, especially getting used to it, but it would be better for you to change now than to force your generations to go through the same turmoil you're struggling with. If you're still living with your abusers or co-habituating, don't let them affect you. They are reflecting what's inside of them and it's not up to you to fix them. Improve yourself. Love yourself. Become all they could never be — driven by spite but not revenge. Vengeance is never yours.

[goodgrlguides]

A Good Girl's Guide to Becoming a Respectful, Respected Parent

My motto has always been: Be a respectful, respected person. And the only way to become respected is to be respectful. Whether or not you've had parents in your life, your experiences can parent you and become a compass to how you think and the directions you take. A majority of parents desire to be respected by their children, which is perfectly normal because children should respect their parents, but how can you when your parents disregard all courtesy and respect towards you and become dictators?

Taking my parents as an example, they are very old fashioned and continually want to present the smooth porcelain vase appearance, while the inside is overflowing with chaos. Being a child to parents like this forces you to put on a mask every time you go out, almost making you forget who you really are when you have to take it off.

The mask is meant to be a cover-up for the discord and disunity that's going on without other's knowing. It is perfectly normal to not share your personal problems with others, but never do it in a way that will make you forget who you are.

If you feel like you're losing your relationship with your children, ask yourself these questions:

What have I done through the subconscious building stages of their life (Ages 0-12)?

Have been hypocritical in my actions towards them?

Do I treat others differently from how I treat them?

Do I verbally, physically or emotionally abuse them? (Remember, abuse comes in various shapes or forms. Calling them degrading names is a form of verbal and emotional abuse which could lead to the physical deteriorating of their bodies)

A guide to becoming a respectful parent:

Make sure as a parent to never forget your courtesy/respect for your children. Being a parent doesn't make you powerful. Being respected as a parent makes you powerful. Children over-analyze every one of their parents' actions. Which means that if you're acting like a hypocrite but putting on your clean porcelain vase mask, you are not respected, even if they act like it.

Focus on working on communication skills. If you are in doubt about how they are feeling about you or how they are acting when around you, privately talk to them. Don't make a public show of them and humiliate them in public. The joy of private conversations is that it's between you and who you are sharing it with. When you fix your conversational skills, you are automatically up at least one step up the respected tier. Try and do this at the early stages of your relationship with them—gradually continue to build trust and stability.

Also, make sure to accept how they prefer to communicate with you. Some find it better to communicate through writing letters because when they take face-to-face, they find it difficult to elaborate their point of view.

Lots of parents believe that their parents are beneath them, but that really isn't the case. In most cases, the way you raise you children will also affect your relationship with them in the future and both of your health. If you lack communication skills with them, it may lead to building up rejection and resentment towards you. Children are meant to learn and create so do not discourage them in what they want to do because of your fear for them failing or falling. Discipline is necessary, but not to the scale of abuse. Kids need to listen but choose the correct method of getting them to listen to you like clear communication and explaining why you are telling them this.

That's it for now and as always, it was lovely having you here and I hope to see you again soon. Remember, be a good girl.

XOXO, Good Girl Guides.