firsnbwife

[firsnbwife]

i found the moment it all went downhill for me. past mel “this guy” is the future love of your life, greatest actor in your heart, and the reason you wake up and breath oxygen every day

first cannot be minimized into just “this guy” shame on you past mel 🫵

but honestly i was so OBSESSED with fkt the moment i saw them together. this is me yapping to my irls abt it and i literally changed my pfp here the same day like i was in immediately for them. no wonder i still can’t shut up abt them.

i’m curious how others got into firstkhao 🎤

[firsnbwife]

Pt. 3: Bison

the next line that capt says is this. there is two parts to what capt. says here 1. gain his trust 2. up your game.

1. gain his trust

the first mention of trust between him and bison is in the tattoo chair scene. kant goes abt this situation very meticulously.

when the topic of bdsm comes up he isn’t fully agreeing to it right off the bat he makes sure that this is something that will gain bison’s trust and bison falls right into his trap with the tiny little face pats. he’s giving kant the exact answer of how to get his trust and that is through bdsm.

after that moment there is not once that kant denies even when we see that he isn’t actually comfortable with doing it.

he never even gives slight doubt to bison that he doesn’t like it when we see later on the glimpse of pain he shows the moment bison turns and fadel leaves. he isn’t letting out even the smallest look of something that could make bison question his enjoyment in this situation.

bc this is where he has been told the trust is. this is how from the beginning he has been hinted will be his biggest advantage in getting what capt. wants and being spared from going to jail and failing babe.

also in the realm of kant forcing himself to participate in the bdsm acts. he never explicitly says that he likes it in a way that is up front and completely sure and with the way he was acting when bison was looking you would think he would be sure now and state it instead of deflecting.

he either gives excuses or reflect it back to him not being hurt.

which we know is a lie from the earlier screenshots

but that’s not what bison wants to know he wants to know if kant is enjoying it cause no dom wants to be doing this to a sub when they aren’t in it for their enjoyment as well.

bison makes so many attempts to check up on kant in the tattoo parlor scene and even needs multiple words of reassurance and convincing.

and still showed some skepticism of kant’s willingness to do this for him

which leads me into

2. up you game

even from the beginning capt. has been saying how kant can’t just use any old tricks to get his information. he’s clarified from the start that kant needs to use all means to get his info but this is the first time he’s specifically telling him that he needs to do more.

hence why now the drugs come into play and kant doesn’t back down from the bdsm scene. that one capt. line

“up your game and gain his trust”

explains every single one of kant’s choices and approaches in ep 3.

up your game to get inside his house and kant knows that the only way to safely succeed in getting this info is to make sure that bison is in an unaware state. there would be too much of a risk there to just go in without a plan and in no way was kant going to be able to search their house with the possibility of bison waking up and finding him. his drinking didn’t do enough so he had to settle for the next best thing to strip bison of his awareness.

gain his trust where kant has been specifically told by bison that indulging him in his kinks is the way to get his full trust. although after that bison did show that he didn’t want kant to do it just for him but kant is desperate. he’s gonna take any little lead he can get to get this information faster. he always has capt. on him reminding him that this is a time sensitive matter.

here’s a similarity i’ve found with chadok and akk. chadok questions akk’s efforts and asks if he has any evidence against aye

immediately after he makes sure wat is filming the gang to be sure he has what chadok wants

but before that he makes sure that akk knows the curse will go on whether it’s him doing it or not. that’s what pushes akk to act. he feels like he has to to now to stop anyone else from getting hurt from the curse he started himself under chadok’s manipulation.

this is how i see kant’s sacrifice of his comfort in ep 3. capt chris makes sure that kant has something to lose (his brother/freedom/saftey), a course of action (get in house/gain trust), and oddly enough encouragement (“you’re a smart brat”)

both chadok and captain chris use manipulation tactics of financial needs, praise, and the well being of others they care abt.

neither akk nor kant have any power against them and it stays that way until the cycle is broken and that always ends up with hurt.

so in conclusion.

FUCK CAPTAIN CHRIS AND FUCK TEACHER CHADOK TOO!!

akk and kant are my babies and i will protect them with my life.

Captain Chris’ Manipulation of Kant Pt. 1

how the conversations with capt chris and kant influence the approaches that kant takes to play out his mission and some intricacies on how capt. chris makes kant think he has no choice. using references to chadok’s grooming of akk

firstly gonna start by explaining how we got here.

you may ask if kant didn’t want to do this why meet with the captain in the first place?

the first time we get introduced to capt. is at the bowling alley when kant ignores his call which is later explained by how kant was already promised freedom from that work so he was avoiding it at all costs.

next time he calls kant is with style and immediately we can see that he doesn’t want to pick up but leading into this the convo of bison was brought up making style tease that it was him. when kant denies, then style ultimately gets curious and questions then who is it?

and now kant feels pressure that he has to pick it up bc then it would be a bigger conversation that kant isn’t willing to have

next we go to their first meeting

kant immediately brings up the fact that he was promised that the last mission was the last and he was free

also goes back to his talk with style before. style doesn’t question it but from the previous avoidance it’s clear that style doesn’t know abt kant’s involvement with the police)

capt.’s response is to agree with him. yes i did do what i said.

he then introduces another job which kant tries to decline and his response is this. he automatically contradicts himself backtracking and using big words to basically say the same thing.

which kant from his convo before already thought was done. he thought he was totally clean and capt here is basically using his knowledge abt the system against kant.

after kant still showed reluctance, capt. realized that this wasn’t enough anymore and that he would have to use dirty tricks to get kant to agree to it this time

he goes on to threaten to bring back up the crimes that he just said he dropped from his previous missions.

kant picks up on this and realizes that he is stuck with no other option but to help him. which capt. give a smile bc his tactics worked

fuck him btw hate his smug face

he goes on to give kant the mission which kant then realizes that it’s bison and probably not thinking gives info abt his prior sexual history with him.

hears that and gives him this look. a look that says

“you already have something against him. use it”

and here’s where similarities between capt. and teacher chadok comes in. capt. uses this look here as a way to indirectly signal to kant what to do this is equivalent to chadok’s hand on akk’s shoulder.

these are puppeteering tactics that both of them use to get their pawns to do their dirty work. chadok knew that akk was the curse and even praised him for it while touching his shoulder like he did before to encourage him to “take care” of things.

this is when akk starts to realize that he was being manipulated the entire time and it wasn’t just his own decisions

i think this is the same way that capt. is trying to use kant. he’s not giving him a specific course of action but hinting at the ways that would be best.

capt. does the same thing

(continue to part 2 in reposts)

[firsnbwife]

Pt. 2: Style

the same way that chadok masterly signals for akk to move as the curse again with the hand on his shoulder, capt. singles kant with his look mentioned in pt. 1.

he does this here as well.

when he gives kant the address he raises his eyebrows and what do you know kant shows up there the very next day.

he’s taking all of capt. cues and doing exactly what the capt. is intending. i believe there is nothing kant is doing that isn’t masterly planted into his head by the capt. atp.

next is their phone call

where kant tries to back out again

capt. proceeds to shut that down with multiple praises to his past work and kant agrees

but also sighs and bows his head in exhaustion. he’s tired of these jobs and it shows. we have no idea how many times he’s been subjected to this cycle of threats and the status of his brothers future dangling over his head.

chadok also uses someone special to akk’s heart as a tool to get him more on board, mes.

mes is someone that akk looks up to and would do anything to be like whereas kant is doing everything to make sure babe doesn’t end up like him. this is a great foil moment that uplifts both of their situations. both having someone special used in different ways for the ppl in power to justify it.

on the topic of other ppl let’s move onto

kant’s conversation with style!

style comes to him to report that he is suspicious of fadel and basically reads him to filth abt being an assassin.

kant’s reaction is to say he’s being ridiculous and compare how multifaceted he is to diffuse his suspicions on fadel

which was actually kinda stupid on his part cause he was talking abt how he’s a lowkey criminal and gave even more substance that fadel can run a burger joint and be an assassin

kant shows guilt abt lying to style after he admits he hates being left out of things which is exactly what kant has been doing abt his blackmail. but in the long run he is doing this to make the blow not as harsh when everything comes crumbling down.

prior to this scene in the sauna capt. warns kant not to tell anyone or it will get more dangerous.

he’s already feeling bad abt dragging style into this with him from his reaction to capt. question. it’s too late now so the only thing he can do to ensure style’s safety is keep him even more in the dark or at least that’s how capt. has made him feel is what needs to be done.

he knows capt. has more experience in this so his advice is going to have a big role in what kant believes he should do. bc kant is going to put himself through these dangerous and uncomfy situations to then have all of the credit taken away from him from the one that’s forcing his hand.

he doesn’t even get rewarded for his sacrifices if he just keeps getting duped into a false sense of freedom.

continuing with the sauna scenes kant admits that he hasn’t learned much and capt. plants the seeds for kant next course of action getting inside their house

which kant already has an obvious aversion to doing bc there is no guarantee that he will make it out alive

literally

the next line that capt. says to kant is the catalyst to every single decision kant makes after this scene in episode 3

(Pt. 3 in reposts)

Captain Chris’ Manipulation of Kant Pt. 1

how the conversations with capt chris and kant influence the approaches that kant takes to play out his mission and some intricacies on how capt. chris makes kant think he has no choice. using references to chadok’s grooming of akk

firstly gonna start by explaining how we got here.

you may ask if kant didn’t want to do this why meet with the captain in the first place?

the first time we get introduced to capt. is at the bowling alley when kant ignores his call which is later explained by how kant was already promised freedom from that work so he was avoiding it at all costs.

next time he calls kant is with style and immediately we can see that he doesn’t want to pick up but leading into this the convo of bison was brought up making style tease that it was him. when kant denies, then style ultimately gets curious and questions then who is it?

and now kant feels pressure that he has to pick it up bc then it would be a bigger conversation that kant isn’t willing to have

next we go to their first meeting

kant immediately brings up the fact that he was promised that the last mission was the last and he was free

also goes back to his talk with style before. style doesn’t question it but from the previous avoidance it’s clear that style doesn’t know abt kant’s involvement with the police)

capt.’s response is to agree with him. yes i did do what i said.

he then introduces another job which kant tries to decline and his response is this. he automatically contradicts himself backtracking and using big words to basically say the same thing.

which kant from his convo before already thought was done. he thought he was totally clean and capt here is basically using his knowledge abt the system against kant.

after kant still showed reluctance, capt. realized that this wasn’t enough anymore and that he would have to use dirty tricks to get kant to agree to it this time

he goes on to threaten to bring back up the crimes that he just said he dropped from his previous missions.

kant picks up on this and realizes that he is stuck with no other option but to help him. which capt. give a smile bc his tactics worked

fuck him btw hate his smug face

he goes on to give kant the mission which kant then realizes that it’s bison and probably not thinking gives info abt his prior sexual history with him.

hears that and gives him this look. a look that says

“you already have something against him. use it”

and here’s where similarities between capt. and teacher chadok comes in. capt. uses this look here as a way to indirectly signal to kant what to do this is equivalent to chadok’s hand on akk’s shoulder.

these are puppeteering tactics that both of them use to get their pawns to do their dirty work. chadok knew that akk was the curse and even praised him for it while touching his shoulder like he did before to encourage him to “take care” of things.

this is when akk starts to realize that he was being manipulated the entire time and it wasn’t just his own decisions

i think this is the same way that capt. is trying to use kant. he’s not giving him a specific course of action but hinting at the ways that would be best.

capt. does the same thing

(continue to part 2 in reposts)

[firsnbwife]

Captain Chris’ Manipulation of Kant Pt. 1

how the conversations with capt chris and kant influence the approaches that kant takes to play out his mission and some intricacies on how capt. chris makes kant think he has no choice. using references to chadok’s grooming of akk

firstly gonna start by explaining how we got here.

you may ask if kant didn’t want to do this why meet with the captain in the first place?

the first time we get introduced to capt. is at the bowling alley when kant ignores his call which is later explained by how kant was already promised freedom from that work so he was avoiding it at all costs.

next time he calls kant is with style and immediately we can see that he doesn’t want to pick up but leading into this the convo of bison was brought up making style tease that it was him. when kant denies, then style ultimately gets curious and questions then who is it?

and now kant feels pressure that he has to pick it up bc then it would be a bigger conversation that kant isn’t willing to have

next we go to their first meeting

kant immediately brings up the fact that he was promised that the last mission was the last and he was free

also goes back to his talk with style before. style doesn’t question it but from the previous avoidance it’s clear that style doesn’t know abt kant’s involvement with the police)

capt.’s response is to agree with him. yes i did do what i said.

he then introduces another job which kant tries to decline and his response is this. he automatically contradicts himself backtracking and using big words to basically say the same thing.

which kant from his convo before already thought was done. he thought he was totally clean and capt here is basically using his knowledge abt the system against kant.

after kant still showed reluctance, capt. realized that this wasn’t enough anymore and that he would have to use dirty tricks to get kant to agree to it this time

he goes on to threaten to bring back up the crimes that he just said he dropped from his previous missions.

kant picks up on this and realizes that he is stuck with no other option but to help him. which capt. give a smile bc his tactics worked

fuck him btw hate his smug face

he goes on to give kant the mission which kant then realizes that it’s bison and probably not thinking gives info abt his prior sexual history with him.

hears that and gives him this look. a look that says

“you already have something against him. use it”

and here’s where similarities between capt. and teacher chadok comes in. capt. uses this look here as a way to indirectly signal to kant what to do this is equivalent to chadok’s hand on akk’s shoulder.

these are puppeteering tactics that both of them use to get their pawns to do their dirty work. chadok knew that akk was the curse and even praised him for it while touching his shoulder like he did before to encourage him to “take care” of things.

this is when akk starts to realize that he was being manipulated the entire time and it wasn’t just his own decisions

capt. does the same thing which i will get more into in the second part!

(part 2 in reposts)

[firsnbwife]

need tiger and lynx to have this hair plsssss

[firsnbwife]

THE HEART KILLERS (2024) episode three

[firsnbwife]

𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗛𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗧 𝗞𝗜𝗟𝗟𝗘𝗥𝗦 | 𝗘𝗣. 𝟯 —𝙎𝙩𝙚𝙥 𝙩𝙬𝙤, 𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙖𝙡 𝙞𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙡. 𝙎𝙩𝙚𝙥 𝙤𝙣𝙚, 𝙙𝙧𝙪𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙩𝙖𝙧𝙜𝙚𝙩.

[firsnbwife]

[ The Heart Killers Ep.3] "I don't know if I'm up for anything tonight. I'm just feeling so tired. // "I'd say you're still pretty good."

[firsnbwife]

The heart killers is a show about morally grey fucked up people. The whole premise of the show is set upon Kant manipulating bison so them doing fucked up/bad things is expected. If this is not your cup of tea please don't watch and don't clog the tag with your whining and moaning about how gross it is

[firsnbwife]

I'm sure he wants something from you. What he wants from me is my body and my heart.

[firsnbwife]

you can dominate the game 'cause i'm tough i don't play around that often, when i do, i'm a freak so you'd better believe i like it rough FLESH — SIMON CURTIS

[ inspo: ★ ☆ ★ ☆ ]

[firsnbwife]

“speaking in tongues, we ain't done yet.” — kantbison, the heart killers (เขาจ้างให้ผมจีบนักฆ่า, dir. jojo tichakorn)

[firsnbwife]

the heart killers character poster: bison

[firsnbwife]

The director of Monster(2023) has often times emphasized on the symbolism of water and fire with Yori and Minato. While Yori is leaning towards water , Minato is leaning towards fire. He also mentioned how a lot of times Yori's father punished him by using water as a weapon which resulted in Yori's fascination with fire. Yori's fear of water due to his abusive dad lead to him finding comfort in fire. He burned the hostess bar his father was in and also burned the dead cat which Minato throws water over later on. Minato is the one who saved him when he drowns (or was probably put there by his dad). Minato is also the only person Yori could find comfort in even though he is significant of something Yori fears. The symbolism gets even more clear when we notice the clothes they wear. Yori is usually wearing bright coloured clothes while Minato is wearing muted coloured clothes (Reference and info from this tweet. Thanks to @_4_cson for sharing this.)

[firsnbwife]

It breaks my heart thinking that the reason why Minato was so scared about the CT scan was because he was worried that his mother would find out there was something wrong with his brain and that he maybe had a pig's brain.

He was so nervous about his mother seeing the reports and thinking that her son was not normal.

His nervousness and the whole fiasco with the school situation resulted in his outburst.

And righfully so. In his defence, he had witnessed the way society reacts to anything that is "not normal". Whether it's the drag queen being made fun of on TV or his friends making fun of his and Yori's friendship.

I cannot imagine the pain this boy was under and the number of nights he spent laying awake, regretting and questioning things about himself.

[firsnbwife]

Monster (2023) or How we fail our children

Yesterday I watched "Monster" from 2023 which was such a well made film, not only in the sense of how it makes you care for each and every character but keeps you on your toes almost through the entire movie.

To me the movie struck a cord bc it seems like a warning. A warning to all of us, or maybe a reminder. To me the movie showed in multiple ways how the adults in the lives of children can greatly impact, detore and fail a child's life.

I'd first talk about Minato's mom. She's a very hard-working single mother, that tries everything to support her son, both emotionally and socially, through standing up and fighting for her son to get justice. It was amazing to see how she reacted calmly and understanding when Minato fumbled his room. She knew it was an outlet for him, not a provocation. So I think his mother is a heart-warming charcater whom we've seen expresses great support and concern for Minato, as a mother should. But what she, in my opinion, fails to do is to listen to Minato more. She says to him a couple of times how he "should grow up, have a family, have children." and he says: " I can' t be like father. (argo I cannot have a wife or children in the common way bc he himself understands that he does not like women, or maybe doesn't want a family like that or some other reasons, it is open for interpretation) And so these words we are all too familiar with- living our lives as one would say as everybody else does. Which for queer kids, folks, people is somewhat of a nuance.

Then we have Hori, the teacher, which we all see after, at his pov, that he takes care of children, teases them and helps them. He IS a good teacher, bc he is a good person, but he too fails Minato and Yori. He says " You are not man enough, not manly enough." very casually to then again tease, but that in itself drives Yori away. Yori says that to Minato when Minato suggests that Yori can confide in Hori for help. But Yori says :"He'd just say I am not man enough." And this is how we alianate children. To me is the weirdest thing ever, to push a child, a boy to be " a man" when they are a child first and foremost.

We have Yori's father of course which I would rather not speak of.

We have the principle, which in my opinion is so flawed, yet so understamding towards Minato. She's the one after all uplifts him and says that everybody deserves and can have happiness in their life. She essentially says: "You're not as damned and lost as you think you are."

At the end Minato and Yori find in each other the understanding that's been missing from their lives for so long, and they allow themselves to be children. Minato allows Yori to be "femenine" and he expresses to him: "You were always normal." He accepts him completely for who he is.

All of this leads me to belive that we as adults push them into a binary, we push them into roles, and we isolate them from themselves and us. Of course we all can agree that it is a queer movie through and through. But I think it also showcases in so many different ways, how adults tend to miscommunicate or repeat bad rethoric to them, making them feel alone and with no one to talk to besides each other.

[firsnbwife]

This dialogue collects all the beautiful meaning of the movie but let's focus for a moment on Yori's "sorry I lied".

That child dared to disobey his own father and incur his punishment, again, just for Minato! These kids want so much to be together, freely and simply. They just want to be themselves with someone who truly understands them and to express their care. They want to never have to ask permission again. Why the social stigma shouldn't have let them experience their first love, their true identity?

And finally in the end they both let go of the shame. They no longer ask permission and accept themselves as they are.

- MONSTER (2023), dir. by Hirokazu Kore'eda