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Stargazer Lilies

Clerith(Cloud x Aerith) One-Shot

WARNING: Suicidal topics, blood, mentions of death, and major spoilers for the original FFVII, however there are no sexual themes.

NOTE: This is a canon-divergent fanfiction, meaning it uses elements from the canon of FFVII but does not follow the canon in its entirety.

Words: 5882

Date Published: 2023-08-25

Summary:

After Sephiroth kills Aerith, Cloud is so distraught that he tries to kill himself later that night, but is unsuccessful. Barrett and Tifa manage to get him to a hospital to recover, but Cloud remains in a comatose state. While he is unconscious, Cloud is teetering so close to the lifestream that he is able to meet Aerith once again.

Life Goes On

“Aerith is gone.” “Aerith will no longer talk, no longer laugh, cry……or get angry……” “What about my pain?” “My fingers are tingling. My mouth is dry. My eyes are burning!”

——————————

Cloud lay wide awake that night, the image of Aerith’s bloodied corpse burned into the backs of his eyeballs. No matter where he looked, nor whether he kept his eyes open or chose to shut them, she was there, floating ethereally in his vision like a goddess. Her soft pink dress was damp with blood and water, her hair was without the signature pink bow she always wore, allowing it to flow freely in the water beneath her, and her eyes were eternally closed, yet despite all of that, she remained ever beautiful even in her last moments. Oh, how he missed looking into her bright verdant eyes already. Not even the healthiest of plants could compare to the richness of her gorgeous eyes.

She was the light of his life. Even when he handed the black materia over to Sephiroth, she didn’t blame him. Even when he threw her to the ground in a fit of rage over his accidental betrayal, she didn’t fight back. She always put others first– always made sure to show Cloud that he mattered, and not just to his friends, but to her. Aerith was always so kind, so gentle…so heavenly. She was not only enchanting in her looks, but in her personality too. She was so full of compassion and pure love; not just towards humans, but toward animals and the planet alike. He never met anyone like her, and he knew he would never meet anyone like her again. The time he may have known her was short, but she meant everything to him. Aerith was gone…and he felt like he was nothing without her.

Cloud sat up in his bed, clutching his temple as his brain began to pound against the back of his eyes. With it came the loud buzzing of an intruder, and his vision became filled with static.

“You…are a puppet.”

Cloud grunted, a bead of sweat dribbling down his hot neck under the cover of his blonde hair as Sephiroth’s words rang in his ears. That was right…he was a puppet– Sephiroth’s puppet. That was all he was, and nothing more. Cloud thought he was traveling the world to save it, but he was following the call of his master all along. If he was anything more than a puppet, he wouldn’t have given Sephiroth the black materia. If he was anything more, Aerith wouldn’t have died.

His head was throbbing so violently that it was unbearable! In a fit of confusion and rage, Cloud threw his legs off of the bed and groaned as he jumped to his feet and lunged for the buster sword. Sephiroth may have been the master of his body, but he refused to let him be the master of his mind. He remembered the way Sephiroth tried to force him to kill Aerith before Sephiroth himself stepped in to finish her off when he realized Cloud wasn’t going to. All this time he had been trying so hard to protect her from Sephiroth, but he never once considered that he was to blame for her demise. It was all his fault, and he needed to put an end to this. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he hurt Barret or Tifa, let alone anyone else he held dearly.

He would finish this once and for all.

“Cloud?!” Tifa exclaimed, her red eyes wide with shock as she jolted awake. She was taken aback and unsure of what to do, she shook Barret awake. Then, she turned back to him, shouting his name once more as Barret chimed in. He didn’t seem to hear either of them.

“I refuse..to be a pawn in your game any longer, Sephiroth!!”

Cloud shouted as he raised the buster sword above his head, only to bring it down, burying its tip deep into his gut. He choked, blood squirting out of his throat with a sharp inhale. He took a step back, stumbling into his bed as he plunged the sword deeper with the intent of ripping his organs out. The buzzing in his ears faded, but everything else did too. He couldn’t hear his friends when they came running to his side, but he could see the way they scrambled to save him. While Tifa fell to his side and held him to her chest, Barret ripped the buster sword’s handle away from his trembling hands and took it into his own so that Cloud could do no more damage. He couldn’t tell what they were saying, but he could feel the way Tifa violently quivered as he lay there bleeding.

“Aerith’s death…is all because of me,” Cloud choked, only for Tifa to lay a finger over his lips in an attempt to quiet him, but he continued, “Sephiroth– I am only..his puppet… but…not anymore.” He could feel the way the two lifted his weakening body off of the bed, but that was the extent of what he could remember before his world consciousness faded and his world evanesced.

——————————

“Cloud…”

“Clouuud~!”

“Are you alright?” A familiar female voice called out. Despite sounding concerned, it was ever gentle. It was sweet like honey, and it was smooth like silk. The voice made Cloud feel so safe, as if he was being hugged by his mother once again. He didn’t think he had the strength to pull himself out of the depths of the loving embrace it had around his heart.

“Oh, don’t tell me you died already! That would be silly.” The voice playfully endearingly taunted, “The Cloud I know is stronger than that.”

Ethereal light filtered into his vision as Cloud’s eyes fluttered open, momentarily blinding him and forcing his eyes shut once more. He squinted, only able to open his eyes fully as he felt a shadow come over the bright light. The calming smell of flowers overwhelmed his senses, and a wave of nostalgia sent a flood of shivers down his spine at the scent. Ever since he had met Aerith that fateful day in Midgar, the smell of flowers had always brought a sort of otherworldly tranquility to him that he had never known before. The smell was beautiful, just like her.

Cloud sat up, holding his head in his hands as he attempted to clear his mind and make sense of the situation. With a gasp, Cloud’s body jerked backward at the sight that lay before him as his focusing vision revealed the face of Aerith– the lovely flower girl he watched die mere hours earlier.

“Aerith,” Cloud stammered, sweat rolling down the side of his forehead as a shameful blush overtook his cheeks, “I–”

“Shh, I know,” Aerith softly reassured him as she offered him a smile and gently pressed her finger to his lips, “It’s okay.”

‘But you–’ was all he could muster before Aerith wrapped her arms around him, burying his reddening face in the crook of her neck. She held him so close to her that she could feel the way he trembled with every breath and the way he sweated as heat radiated off of his body, even as she closed her eyes. She could tell that he regretted ever hurting her or ever trying to hurt her, though she never bore a grudge against him, as she knew it wasn’t his fault. The Cloud she knew was anxious and closed off, but deep down she knew he cared for others. She knew he was a kind soul and she loved him for it. She cherished their time together from the bottom of her heart– she only wished it hadn’t been so short.

“It’s okay.” She repeated, her tone quiet and tender, “You don’t need to say anything…”

Aerith always knew what to say. Aerith always knew what to do. Cloud loved her more than anything on Gaia and in life itself. Losing her meant that he lost his entire world, and he didn’t know how to live on. It had only been mere hours, but he missed her more than she would ever know. He couldn’t help it when he began to stagger his breaths as a flood of tears came crashing down, and his entire body grew hot with sorrow. For minutes on end, the two of them sat in verbal silence, but that didn’t matter; there were no words powerful enough to describe the relief Cloud felt at being able to see her again. Being able to be held in her arms was enough.

“Aerith…” Cloud eventually pulled away to look into her eyes, his own still glossy and red from crying, as he sniffled, “I…I’m sorry. If I hadn’t given Sephiroth the black materia, you would–”

“What did I say?” Aerith cut him off, a playful tone returning to her otherwise soft words to lighten the mood, “It’s okay. It wasn’t your fault.”

Cloud drew a deep, shaky breath, stunned into silence at her words. How could she not blame him after everything he had done? He was nothing but Sephiroth’s puppet, and his inability to fight back against Sephiroth was what cost her his life. If he hadn’t given Sephiroth the black materia, and if he had been able to control his body when he needed to protect her most, she would still be alive. It was all his damn fault, and he knew it. How could she–

“I know what you’re thinking,” Aerith drew him out of his thoughts, “And no matter what you say or do, there’s nothing you can do to convince me that any of this is your fault.” Aerith rolled backward onto her shins, and she traced her hands down Cloud’s arms where they landed on his knuckles. Her gaze shifted downward, fixated on their hands as she flipped them over and curled their fingers together. “That wasn’t you, and that never was you. The Cloud I know is strong, kind, handsome…and most of all, he cares for his friends. He would never do anything to hurt the people he loves... I saw the way you struggled every time he tried to steal your mind away, and I know that you tried your hardest to fight back against him…and that’s all that matters to me.”

Silence ensued once more, but not from lack of knowing what to say. Rather, Cloud was taken aback by her intuition and how she knew that Sephiroth had been trying to control him throughout their journey, but he couldn’t bring himself to ask her why. There wasn’t anything that could get past her it seemed, and that was yet another part of her that he loved. She was wise, just like the Cetra that came before her were said to be. Everything about Aerith was brilliant, and the more he learned about her, the more she blew him away. Why did the world have to take the good ones away? Life was so cruel.

“You don’t deserve this.” Cloud began after moments of contemplation. His voice was much more stable as his tears began to wash away, but his eyes remained set on the way she so tenderly intertwined their fingers. Her hands were small and delicate compared to his, but he knew she was stronger than he would ever be, and that was what gave him the strength to calm himself for the time being. If she could hold herself together, he would too, for her sake. “And if you don’t blame me for your death, then there’s nothing I can do to convince you. You’re too stubborn.”

“Oh yeah? And what does that make you?” Aerith teased, giggling. The way she was able to make light of any situation without making it any less significant was something only an angel directly descended from the heavens could do. “If I’m the stubborn one, then…I guess you must be some immovable wall. Not even the strongest of my waves can force you to come tumbling down, huh?”

“I didn’t mean to– sorry.” Cloud blushed, looking away from their hands and at the church. Just like when he met her for the second time back in the slums, they seemed to be seated in Aerith’s flowerbed, which was filled with stargazer lilies. “Forget I said anything.” Cloud pulled their hands away as he stood up to get a better view of their surroundings.

Aerith sat there for a moment longer, still staring down at their hands before she lifted her gaze, then finally pulled herself off of the ground and dusted herself off. “I bet you’re curious, huh?”

“...Yeah.” Cloud nodded, wiping his tears away before he continued to look around the place. He took a few steps forward, careful to navigate his way out of her flowerbed. “This looks just like the church I met you in– the church in the slums. How’s that?”

“You came crashing through my ceiling again…though I always have boys crashing down from the heavens and onto my flowerbed, it seems.” She chuckled, “But it’s okay. Like I said before, my flowers are strong. They can take it.”

“I’ll try not to do it anymore.” Cloud apologized in a joking manner that betrayed his static tone of voice as he continued to slowly walk around the church. It was strange to him– this place looked and felt real but there was no wind, and the further he looked through the windows of the church, he noticed it became unnaturally blurry. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t see past a certain barrier.

“Well, I’d hope you’re not doing it on purpose. That would just be mean.” Aerith teased. She always loved doing that.

The two were silent for a few minutes, but it was never tense. Aerith slowly walked over to Cloud, following him around with her hands behind her back as he investigated the place. He was quick to notice the way the buildings remained just as blurry the closer he got to them as they had been from far away, even with how close he was to the exit of the church, and he realized how white the sky beyond those far-off buildings was, too.

“Am I dead?” Finally came the question out of Cloud’s lips.

“Hmm..”

Cloud looked over his shoulder before fully turning to face Aerith, an expecting look in his eyes.

“Not quite.” Aerith finally answered after moments of leaving Cloud on edge, though she hadn’t done so to spook him. “The lifestream is my home now, but as for you...I think you’re just visiting.”

“How so?” Cloud asked, slightly raising a brow.

“Well,” Aerith started, her eyes softening with worry once more, “I can still hear Tifa and Barret calling out to you. Can you hear them?”

Cloud took a moment, trying his best to listen to no avail. He shook his head.

“You’re in the hospital, I think. I can hear the slow beeping of a heart monitor.”

“So why can’t I hear it?” Cloud asked, still trying to hear what Aerith was hearing.

“Dunno.” She shrugged, “Maybe you’re choosing not to hear it?”

“That doesn’t make sense.”

“Well…I saw the way you brought yourself here. I’ve been watching you since I died, y’know. I saw the way you shouted something, then…” she trailed off, frowning.

“I…” Cloud fell silent, ashamed of himself. While he still wanted to die if it meant saving his friends from him ever losing control again, he was thoroughly ashamed to admit the fact that he attempted to kill himself to Aerith… “I heard him again. Sephiroth, he..he was trying to take over again. I didn’t know what he wanted at that time, but...I wasn’t going to let him hurt the only people I had left.”

“Is that all there is to it?” Aerith asked, still frowning. She wasn’t upset at him, but she hated to see him so broken up the way he was. Besides, she knew Cloud– the way he didn’t like to admit to everything, even if it was just to himself.

Cloud was confused by that question. What else would there be to it? He didn’t want to hurt his friends, and if it meant killing himself so Sephiroth couldn’t control him any longer, then so be it. It wasn’t like he was anything more than a puppet, anyway– and he refused to bend to Sephiroth’s will.

——————————

The soft glow of moonlight filtered into the otherwise dim room that had only been lit up by the soft light of a heart monitor moments prior. There was a gentle breeze from a nearby window that had been cracked open, but not even the cool touch of the wind could provide solace to the room’s current inhabitants. After Cloud had stabbed himself in the gut it seemed like there would be no saving him, but by the speedy actions of Barret and Tifa as they brought Cloud’s body to The Highwind, Cid was able to quickly pilot them to a nearby hospital. Typically, with a wound that big and with that much blood loss, a normal person would have been dead by the time it took them to make it to The Highwind, but perhaps due to the mako that flowed through Cloud’s veins, he was able to make it just long enough to be hooked up to a heart monitor and have his wounds patched up.

Barrett and Tifa now sat close to one another in the dimly lit room. While Barrett was leaning forward with his elbows resting on his inner thighs, Tifa sat with her face buried against his firm arm, hiding the side of her face with her curled-up hand. Their tears had long since dried, but they were still deathly worried about the state of their friend. Even with all that he had done, they couldn’t bring themselves to blame Cloud either– they cared for him immensely and wished they knew what had driven him to this point. Was it because he blamed himself for Aerith’s death? They both remembered the bone-chilling terror they felt when they watched him stab the buster sword into his abdomen and the way he shouted something about not allowing Sephiroth to control him any longer as he did so, but they both questioned the validity of their memories with how distraught the two of them were.

“Wake up, dammit…” Barret mumbled as his hand curled up into a tight ball, causing the palms of his hands to brighten from the pressure. His eyes had been staring so deeply into Cloud as if he believed staring at him long enough would force the boy awake, but he knew that wasn’t the way things worked. Defeated, Barret hung his head and whispered, “We can’t afford to lose you too.”

——————————

Cloud now sat outside of the church, one knee curled to his chest with the corresponding forearm upon its peak while the other leg lay extended on the ground. He still couldn’t quite grasp what Aerith meant by her question, however, he was more glad to see Aerith than anything, so it was she who truly occupied his mind. He had been looking straight ahead at the whiteness of the sky, and its pure color reminded him just how clear and kindhearted Aerith was. He looked up at her, and upon catching his gaze in her peripherals, Aerith stopped what he was doing and smiled at him. “You bored yet? There’s not much to do here if I’m honest…” She sighed, although her smile remained as her eyes dropped back to the floor.

“I don’t mind. It’s nice here.” Cloud admitted, his eyes returning to the horizon, “There’s no war, no violence, no anger, no despair…just you and me.”

“And there are certainly no other people here!” Aerith chuckled, “But you like that, don’t you? I never took you as a people’s person.”

Cloud smiled abruptly, “Yeah…never was a fan of ‘em.”

“It doesn’t bother you that you’ll never see another person besides me again?” Aerith inquired, looking back at Cloud, though he did not return her gaze.

He simply shook his head, “No, not really.”

“And what about Tifa? What about Barret? Or Yuffie, Red XIII…or the rest of your friends?”

“I can make an exception for them.” Cloud joked, “Though..I would rather they not end up here. Since we’re dead n’all.”

"They're worried sick about you, Cloud." Aerith frowned, "I heard Barret calling out to you earlier, and the way Tifa was shouting at you when they brought you in– before you even woke up here. They miss you, Cloud. Does that really not bother you?"

Cloud frowned, his gaze hardening as he lowered it to the ground, almost as if he was shameful. He was silent for a moment, but then he sighed, "Let them be worried. As long as I'm not there to hurt them, they'll be okay. They just..have to be strong and get through this. This is the first time I've had an entirely clear head in years, Aerith. I can't feel Sephiroth in my veins here. I can't hurt you or anyone else anymore. It's better this way." He raised his head yet again, though he continued staring off at the sky rather than looking her way, "Trust me."

"I can't believe you." Aerith squatted, making herself eye-level with Cloud, practically commanding his gaze her way, and finally, she got it in return. "You're telling me you're gonna let them fight Sephiroth alone? You're just gonna give up and take the easy way out?"

Cloud was at a loss for words. She was scolding him like she was his mother and yet he couldn't find it in himself to dismiss what she said. He did feel horrible for leaving them behind, and he felt even worse for it once he looked into Aerith's disappointed eyes, but he steeled himself. "It's better this way, Aerith," he hated being at odds with her but he stood his ground, "At least like this, they won't have to worry about fighting me and Sephiroth at the same time. Instead, they can just focus on taking him down."

"And what makes you think they're going to have to fight you?" Aerith asked, "You're their friend– not their enemy. They love you, and I know you love them. They need you, Cloud. They can't face him alone."

Cloud was silent once more before he let out a sigh, "You know the way he's able to take control of me. If I go to fight Sephiroth, they'll end up–"

"Don't even finish that sentence." Aerith lowered herself onto her knees and scooted closer to him, placing a hand on his shoulder as she searched his eyes for understanding, "I know you. Sephiroth..he tried to make you hurt me, didn't he? But you fought against him. You didn't let it happen. I know you're strong enough to fight back when it really comes down to it."

"I…maybe…" Cloud's eyebrows furrowed, and unable to stand the weight of his guilt, he looked away. He shook his head, "I can't go back."

"Cloud…" She called with a voice so soft it could be mistaken for a whisper. She tilted her head as she reached out for Cloud's cheek, cupping it into her hands. She gently directed his gaze toward her as she placed her other hand on the opposite cheek and she offered him a sorry smile, "It's okay to want to stay here…but I can't let you."

"Why?" Cloud asked, his voice quiet as well, "It's safer this way. If I stay here by your side, I can't hurt them."

"Because, Cloud…I need you to be honest with yourself. Is that really all there is to it?"

There came the question again. What more was she referring to? Cloud closed his eyes for a moment, redirecting his thoughts as he desperately dug through them for an answer. Aerith had always been such a wise lady– she wasn't the type to be persistent just because she could. Even in her times of silliness, her actions always had meaning; they always had intelligence behind them. Aerith was brilliant. Not only was she smart, but she understood people. Aerith understood the parts of Cloud that he did not, and she drew them out. He knew that there was something he wasn't getting, and he realized there was something Aerith thought he could only understand if she was able to make him see it for himself.

"Think, Cloud." She tilted her head forward and brought his closer in turn, allowing their foreheads to press against one another as both of their eyes closed. The green, white, and blue light of the lifestream enveloped the area upon the shared contact of their foreheads, shifting their surroundings to match that of Aerith's home in the sector 5 slums down on Gaia, "Think."

Cloud could feel as reality shifted under his feet. He could feel the way his body now sat in a field of flowers atop an incline, and although the wind remained stagnant, he could feel how pure the air was against his skin. As Aerith slipped her head and hands away, his eyes fluttered open, allowing him to take in the beauty of her garden for what it was. He was met with Aerith now sitting on her shins once more, her hands overlapping one another as they lay in her lap, and a loving smile on her face. He couldn't help it when his cheeks grew rosy from the sight of that tender smile and the way she looked upon him with nothing but pure admiration in her eyes. Aerith was gorgeous, and these flower fields only amplified her charm.

"Oh Cloud," she giggled without saying another word. She recognized the way he looked at her– the way he blushed –and even without him having to say anything, she knew what he was thinking. Cloud was too innocent to have dirty thoughts, she knew, so it was clear to her that his look was one of wonder and love for her. Cloud was so precious, and that was exactly why she needed to make him see what he was missing for himself. She always found teaching through actions rather than telling through words to be a more effective lesson.

"Sorry." Cloud hadn’t quite realized how long he had been staring at Aerith and it embarrassed him to think about it, so he promptly peeled his eyes away and chose to take in the scenery. Just like their previous landscape, the further away he looked from their current location, it got unnaturally blurry, and the sky remained as white as ever. “So why did you bring me here?”

“Just thought a change of scenery would be nice.” Aerith smiled for a moment before she looked in the direction Cloud had been. The two of them now looked at the house Aerith used to share with Elmyra, and she could feel an air of sorrow come about the longer they dwelled on it.

“She was always so kind to me… Even when I didn’t deserve it.” Aerith started, her words tender. “Take care of her for me, won’t you?”

“I’m sure they will.”

“Not them– you, silly.” Aerith turned to Cloud, nudging his shoulder with her hand, “Like I said...I’m not letting you die yet.”

“How’s that?” Cloud challenged, “As far as I’m concerned, I don’t want to go back.”

“Because…” Aerith hummed, “I know what you’ve told yourself, why you’re here, and…it’s all a lie.”

Cloud grunted in confusion as his baby blues trailed over to look at Aerith, though it was now her who wouldn’t return his gaze. As she continued to stare off at the house she grew up in, he saw her eyebrows furrowed in worry. Cloud wasn’t sure what to say to that. After all, how could he be lying? He killed himself, or at least tried to, because he didn’t want to be Sephiroth’s puppet. He didn’t want to hurt his friends anymore. Aerith may not have blamed him for her death, but he thoroughly believed it was his fault. Just what part of that was a lie?

Cloud took a moment to dig deep into the meaning of her words. Was he not being honest with himself as she said? Tifa always told him that he tended to be stubborn, so perhaps that stubbornness was at play here. “I’m lost.” He admitted, lowering his head. She, however, didn’t say anything in return, leaving him to sink further into his thoughts. As he hung his head, Cloud slowly closed his eyes and allowed himself to feel the earth. He could feel the way the dirt brushed against the cloth of his pants, and he could smell the sweet yet subtle scent of tranquility the flowers around them gave off. That smell always made him think of Aerith…perhaps that was why he felt so happy here. Perhaps that was why he didn’t want to go back. The real word was so uncertain and frightening that he didn’t want to return, but then…wouldn’t that make him a coward? Was it truly so bad that he didn’t want to return to a reality as cruel as Gaia– the very same reality that so coldly ripped Aerith away from him?

Perhaps…he just didn’t want to leave Aerith.

His lungs expanded as he drew a long, deep breath, and then Cloud returned to utter silence once more. He realized that although it felt nice to breathe, he didn’t need to. He couldn’t even hear Aerith breathing. Was it because they were dead? It was chilling to think that their bodies no longer required oxygen to sustain themselves, though it wasn’t something Cloud truly found horrifying. The thought of being a part of the lifestream should have been haunting, but Cloud felt so safe here. For once in his life, he felt happy. Just being here with Aerith was enough for him. He loved her.

Cloud gasped, his eyes shooting open as they flickered over to Aerith. He pined for her eyes to meet his, but she continued to stare off at the horizon. Although she wouldn’t meet his eyes, he could feel that there was a different air about them, and he could see that there was pain in her otherwise strong eyes.

He blinked. Suddenly, the sky was no longer pure white, but a cool amethyst gradient that faded into a golden glow, as if the sun were now setting. Although there hadn’t been any wind here thus far, a gentle breeze began to pick up that ruffled her chocolate locks and made her look more like a goddess than ever before. However, she still didn’t return his gaze.

“Aerith, I…” Cloud began, his eyes twinkling under the setting sun, “I love you.”

Aerith tilted her head aside, reaching her delicate hands to the rose-colored bow that held her hair up. Her fingers searched for the inner sanctum of her ribbon, only for her to pull it loose, allowing a mahogany ocean of hair to come crashing down.

“I know.” Was all she said as she looked down at the ribbon she now held. Cloud couldn’t see her eyes past her hair, but he didn’t need to. He could feel the bittersweet relief radiating off of her as she sat in complete silence, and in that moment he caught himself wondering just what was going on inside her head. His heart was pounding in his ears and he could feel himself begin to tremble ever so slightly as his skin grew clammy. The palms of his hands were sweaty against the leather fabric of his gloves, but he couldn’t pry his eyes off of the beauty that was Aerith.

“That’s why I can’t let you stay here.” Aerith slowly raised her head, finally returning Cloud’s long-awaited gaze. There were wet streaks on both of her cheeks and the ribbon she held had damp, darkened spots from her tears. She let out a small chuckle that crackled with pain and joy as she scooted closer to Cloud, keeping the ribbon in hand. She now sat knee to knee with him, their eyes forever interlocked in a mutually sorrowful gaze. Careful not to break their eye contact, Aerith reached for Cloud’s hands and took them into her own, curling her ribbon into the palms of his hands.

“There’s so much you need to do, Cloud. So many people you need to save. So many people who need your guidance and love.” Aerith spoke with reverence towards Cloud, “Sephiroth is going to use Meteor soon, and..I know I’m not the only one you cherish. Tifa, Barrett, Vincent, Cid, Yuffie, Red XIII, Marlene..and many more– so many people love you and need you, Cloud…which is why you need to go. I can’t bear to see the way you would break if they ended up like me.”

“You’re right…” Cloud’s eyebrows curled with shame, “I’m sorry. All you’ve ever wanted to do is help me. I can’t believe the way I–”

“Don’t blame yourself.” Aerith cut him off, squeezing his hands, “We all get sad sometimes, and that’s okay. What matters is that we’re able to pick ourselves up and keep moving after we fall.”

“Thank you, Aerith.” Cloud pulled her closer, returning the squeeze of her hands with an equally loving one of his own. “You’ve done so much for me. More than you’ll ever know.”

“I’m glad.” She smiled. She closed her eyes and lowered her head against his collarbone. “Just don’t forget me, okay?”

Taking the ribbon into his hand, Cloud released the grip he had on her hands and wrapped his arms around her, enveloping her in a warm hug as he now gripped the bow against her back. Unlike the way they embraced when he first got here, it was now she who was silently crying against him, though that didn’t make her any weaker for it. It was okay to be sad, he learned. It was okay to cry. It was okay to be angry, even. All these emotions were a part of being human, and Aerith taught him that. All that mattered was that they were able to pick themselves up and keep living on in spite of it all. No matter what life threw at him, he would get back up– not just for Aerith or his friends, but for himself. He was more than a puppet; he was a human being who had people he loved, and people who loved him.

He would face Sephiroth, and he refused to back down this time. There wasn’t a thing he didn’t cherish, and he would protect Gaia with all of his being. Even if he didn’t succeed, all that mattered was that he tried his hardest to protect what mattered most. It wasn’t his genetics that determined whether he was human or not, but what he decided to do with himself, and if it meant fighting for the right to exist, so be it. He refused to back down.

“I’ll never forget you, Aerith."

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