ephimerides

[ephimerides]

hi um were wondering if theres a term/role for an alter thats like... also two people? sort of like a fusion or amalgam, theyre one "being" but they lean more towards one persona or the other i guess?

if not would anyone be down to coin one? thanks!

[ephimerides]

[ephimerides]

You don’t need a system name, you don’t need a system aesthetic, you don’t need a collective identity. You don’t need to put your whole system– or any aspect of it– online in order to be a system.

You can just exist, you don’t need to make every aspect of your system public. You’re still a system even without a system name or collective pronouns or a system blog.

[ephimerides]

ok so now that finnster's come out as genderfluid and started taking hrt can we stop trying to force people to choose labels and define their identity. everyone's always talking about support for queer people with unconventional presentations and identities but when someone's not sure about what their gender identity actually is they get criticized for it. finn said in his video that part of the reason why he took so long with coming out was because he wasn't sure what label actually applied to him (and he still isn't even sure if genderfluid feels like the right label for him) and the debate surrounding it was making him uncomfortable. which kind of sucks tbh. idk i dont like how much identity policing ive seen around them it feels like people just aren't comfortable with 'weird' gender presentation

[ephimerides]

[ephimerides]

I should update the info on here, lol

[ephimerides]

“Pretend” yes.

[ephimerides]

Friendly reminder to all protectors that you're a person too and you're allowed to just exist. You're allowed to front when something non stressful is happening. You're allowed to have hobbies or interests that aren't tied to being a protector. You're allowed to chill and relax a little, you're not stealing time from anyone I promise. You're allowed to cry or be sad or upset, you're not weak or a "bad protector" for doing so. You're a person too. It's great that you protect them but remember, you're not a shield, you're a person. You matter as much as the rest. The world won't end if you let yourself relax and live a little, I promise. You don't have to be strong all the time and I'm sorry if that is your current circumstance though, I promise it gets better. Just let yourself live and be a person. You've already done so much for them. You deserve some breaks and affection too

[ephimerides]

Epoch, Reiterative, and Ecliptive flags

Epoch [left]: A grouping of members who came into existence during a specific time period. Members in an epoch don’t have to be in a subsystem, layer, or any other kind of classification, but are grouped together by time-period.

Reiterative [mid]: A system (or group within a system) whose members act as chronological versions of an existing member(s), and may take over the previous “spot” the older member(s) had.  Previous members will usually still exist as any other member does, but they often represent a former point in time, or state, of a particular member(s).

Ecliptive [right]: Members of a system who came from one original person, and then split into parts. Unlike most splits, ecliptives have no “original” member that the new member split off of; the original member completely split into new parts, where neither one is older than the other, and the original member is no longer present.

Blank flags under the cut. Source for these terms here.

[ephimerides]

So we've kind of figured out our memory problems. (In terms of timeline.)

Not sure what to do with the information but there's a solid two years in the middle with far fewer gaps aside from the normal forgetfulness most people have over time. Which is weird but whatever.

[ephimerides]

thinking of making a survey on P-DID.

there is no information of P-DID other than the diagnosis criteria. there is no mention of it on most plurality based sites either(only exception i believe is pluralpedia?)

i want to research and learn about my disorder and compare and contrast experiences between fellow plurals with P-DID and those with DID, OSDD, DDNOS, and UDD.

maybe i can use the survey for a possible study? i haven't done a study before though. maybe an article would be easier.

what questions would you like to see on a P-DID survey?

[ephimerides]

Finally making Rathien a blog :), deciding if we want to share it here or not

[ephimerides]

i understand that younger people can get swept up in discourse about not wanting to step on the toes of disabled people (DID, UDD, OSDD etc systems), but back in the day in the early 90s, the people paving the way and pioneering inclusive plural safe spaces were almost entirely endo systems. every single site about multiplicity from the 90s and 2000s focused very heavily on healthy and non disordered multiplicity and how DID (known as MPD back then) was valid and also a form of multiplicity... just not the ONLY one. they also helped dispell myths about DID, and gave links to accurate information about disordered plurality as well

there were people identifying as naturally and spiritually plural way, way before DID even got the name it has now, it's such a normal phenomenon that has numerous causes. sites like kinhost.org and Astraea's Web were all about discussing plurality without mentioning disorders, without passing judgment.

even so, the spiritual and natural multiplicity communities literally helped me realize i had DID. they gave me access to information about real people with DID like Truddi Chase and The Troops, and helped me research actual medical papers and documents. though a hard read, When Rabbit Howls helped me confirm that I also have DID... and I have only ever seen this book mentioned on sites run by non disordered systems. (lots of TWs for the book BTW please ask me or research before reading.)

we work best together. all system types make a great team. let's keep working together.

[ephimerides]

The memory loss as a feature of ptsd and dissociative disorder is rarely talked about. It’s not only ‘big holes in memories’ or 'blank periods of time’, though of course that happens too. But you lose people from your memory too.

Relationships, friendships. People who once meant everything to you, you can’t recall their names anymore. People you only casually knew during a period of trauma can fade from your mind completely. You can’t remember what you said to someone, what conversations you had together, even the fights and the lows, it all becomes a blur, and then completely fades away.

Your life is sorted into periods of whatever trauma was going on at the moment, but you can’t recall what else took place. What you learned, what experiences you had, the normal things you did that later feel bizzare for a person in your situation to do, to be able to do. Or you don’t remember the trauma, and it’s difficult to put things into any kind of context.

And for your childhood, it’s impossible to make a timeline out of it. Events mesh together, there’s no before or after, to link an event to a year is almost impossible, for any event you can’t tell if you were 5 or 8 or 14, you try and make sense based on what else was going on in your life, except you can’t quite remember what it was. You lived one life at home, a whole another life in school or public space, another one online, and they don’t seem to be connected at any point, and to link it all in a timeline feels impossible.

The memories that don’t hold strong emotions fade first, but eventually, the ones with strong emotions fade too.

Your short term memory becomes difficult as well, it feels like an incredible strain to remember anything you did 2 weeks ago, or 2 days ago, or yesterday. If you’re reminded of something that went on a year ago, it’s a shock because you no longer remember it as something that happened at all. Your brain erases anything that ended as something that never happened, or isn’t worth recalling, or would only stress you out to think about, so you don’t, and it goes away.

Having a memory surge back is stressful, because you realize you never thought about this event, or this person, for years, and this meant something to you, it formed you and shaped your life, it made you feel something. But it was gone for so long, and probably, the second you forget it, it will be gone again. It’s hard to see who you are when you no longer know who you were. You don’t know how anyone perceives you because you don’t recall your experience together.

[ephimerides]

New person: "what's your name?"

All of us trying to think of which name to use:

–Jamie

[ephimerides]

What singlets think existing with DID/OSDD is like: Oh woe is me I am plagued by these demons which tell me to commit murder every hour on the hour how will i ever have a normal life

What it's actually like:

[ephimerides]

[Text: This system doesn’t want the host’s family to know.]

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