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God I'm so tired of being lonely

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Love (unrequited)

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Loner at the Wedding

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Duet

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Writhe

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I think I understand hanahaki now—the absence of returned feelings is choking me from the inside

Sweet author, won't you let me cut this bouquet from my lungs?

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Sometimes you have those days where all you can say is "ow"

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If I climb the ladder, will I be able to be someone's fourth choice? Maybe third, if I'm hopeful? Why am I always stuck at the bottom?

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All I want right now is to earn the trust of another

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honestly, I think it’s the fact that she makes me want to create music out of everything; I need everything to sing to her my feelings, from the whispers of grasses under the stars to a piano sonata in a stuffy old house; I have to tell her in every possible way

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love is such a strangely selfish thing. you want the best for the person that holds your heart--but is it because they have that influence on you that you don’t want them to suffer? because if they bow too low from suffering, your heart will tread through the dirt? your feelings for them are driven by your own soul’s desires. you want them to crave you in return, and you want it so badly that rejection becomes a physical pain. you love them so much that you’d let them crush you. you’d let it happen, because then at least they wouldn’t be suffering. then, you’ve done your duty of love to keep them from that pain. yet, somewhere in there, you wish that someone would one day view your heart in the same way. what a selfish thing, indeed.

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Selfish//

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I miss being called "my love" by a person I want to hear it from

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untitled love poem

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supernova // gia i. aka a thing that i wrote about lonliness...it's very much unedited so i might come back and fix it later but! yeah!

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They ask me, "Why?" And I find this a silly question, because there are a thousand and none when it comes to answers.

But I think about it, and I know I have to find a way to put it into words.

So, why am I in love?

Well, it is because if you ask me, what is softness? I will say it is her presence I can feel a thousand miles away.

If you ask me, what is kindness? I will tell you that it is her heartfelt messages on a cloudy day.

Then, what is gentleness? I will describe the way she gives me reassurance about myself.

And going on, what is comfort? Well, easily it is her warm embrace that lulls me to sleep even when I am alone.

You may ask, what is sweet? To that, I will reply that it is the way she remembers the little things about me.

So then, what is beautiful? And I will describe her stunning smile, her creations and crafts, her overflowing heart.

Furthermore, what is longing? I will say that it is the desire to have her right beside me while we work towards our goals.

What is hope, then? That, I would have to say, is the flutter I feel in my heart to think that she might want me back.

And if all these things are combined, then would that be love? In all honesty, I have no answer. All I know is that I grin when she wakes and texts me first, and I loathe to fall asleep at night without having her laughter in my mind. I think love is knowing that I would give all of that up just to know she was happy. I thank that is it to me.