donnalawliet - Tumblr blog

[donnalawliet]

Chapter 3 of Coffee or Tea (Five x Derek)

After all of your suggestions, feedback and general encouragement, here it is! The third chapter of this story.

———————————

----------------------------

Five and Derek grow closer, through good and bad times.

-----------------------------

Five had been trying to live a more normal life. He took vacation days, watched movies with Derek and sometimes got his morning dose of caffeine at a coffee shop instead of making it himself. It most definitely wasn’t easy to let go of his former life, where he constantly had to be on guard. But it was nice and his therapist had assured him that it would take practice, that healing from trauma couldn’t be rushed. Through all of it, Derek remained by his side, even when it became incredibly tough.

———————————

“Mr.Five, she’s turning six years old“, Derek insisted. They had spent almost an hour looking for a birthday present for Grace, Five’s favourite niece. The oldest Hargreeves sibling had joked once that she had the looks of Diego and the intellect of Lila, which was both a compliment and an insult.

“Yes?“, Five held up the book that he had been considering, “This is a quantum physics book for beginners. She’ll like it, I’m sure of it. You can get her another gift.“

He was stubborn and he insisted on his pick. For their birthdays, Reginald had always bought practical presents. Books, weapons, anything that he thought represented real value. So Five had never really received normal gifts. And even though he tried to step away from his father’s lessons, some of them stuck. But he also knew Grace. She was quite bright and already surpassed her reading levels.

Derek sighed heavily, soon enough returning with a board game. He didn’t have a lot to do with kids, but he knew enough to know that a gift like that was a safe bet.

“Alright, I’ll trust you on this. Let’s just get them both wrapped up“, he said, his tone softening again, “But this is the last time we do last minute gift shopping.“

Five chuckled, reaching out to take ahold of Derek’s elbow. He still wasn’t completely comfortable with unannounced romantic touching, but he had grown to enjoy small gestures of affection. Both with his partner and with his family. After so many tough years, he wanted to be a good uncle and brother, even if it meant attending birthday parties full of screaming children, most of which he couldn’t care less about.

“Are you sure that you want me to come with you?“, Derek asked him out of the blue once they got into the car, “I fully understand if you want to be alone with your family.“

Even though he had met Five’s family, he was still a bit nervous from last time. He couldn’t shake the feeling that they didn’t completely trust him yet. Along with that came the knowledge of how much his boyfriend loved his siblings.

“No, you’re coming with me“, Five insisted, though he kept his eyes fixated on the road ahead, “I’m not dealing with them by myself, you’re the only one who can stop me from murdering them.“

He loved his siblings, that was a well known fact. But they also annoyed him on a regular basis. Of course, Five would never intentionally kill them…though he had to hold himself back a few times. Sometimes he wondered if he really was a killer at heart, if the Handler had been right that the Commission hadn’t corrupted him, he had done it himself by just existing. His knuckles turned white from how hard he was gripping his steering wheel, his thoughts running wild.

Luckily, Derek pulled Five out of it before he could crash the car. The younger man had gotten better at recognising the signs that Five was experiencing an episode. The episodes themselves had turned milder as well, but they hadn’t stopped, even after all this time.

“Five, I’m here“, he said firmly, without touching his partner. Touches were still a complicated topic, so he used his voice. And it was almost always enough to get Five to snap out of his thoughts. Derek belonged to a time without the Handler, without the Commission or the apocalypse, so he symbolised safety for him.

“Yeah, I know“, Five mumbled, relaxing his grip a bit as he pulled up to the parking lot, taking a few deep breaths. He was grateful and Derek fortunately knew that, because he still had trouble saying it. Yet he smiled softly when Five whispered a quiet thank you, just before they walked inside together.

———————————

Derek stared at the situation in front of him in shock. He had already handed Grace his gift and she had politely said thank you, most likely taught by her Uncle Klaus. After him however, Five had insisted on handing over his gift, the book he had fought Derek over.

“Wow!“, Grace squealed with joy once she read the title, her eyes lighting up, “That’s so cool, Uncle Five! I love it!“

She didn’t even give her uncle a chance to say anything in response, all but lunging at him for a hug. Five’s eyes widened, before his expression settled into a wide grin. Very gently, he wrapped his arms around his niece, allowing himself to settle down into the moment. This was everything he had wanted for years and he wanted to enjoy it as much as he could.

“I’m glad you like it, you clever girl“, he whispered, so only he, Grace and maybe Derek could hear it, “You enjoy your birthday, alright?“

Never before had Five found any enjoyment in birthdays. Not in his childhood with Reginald, not in the apocalypse, not in the time that came afterwards. But he would do anything to make sure his nieces and nephew would have a chance at enjoying what he never truly had.

Grace nodded, still holding onto the book tightly as Five set her back down. Sometimes she reminded the family of their robot mother, who she had been named after. The same gentleness, mixed with the chaos that were the genes of Diego and Lila.

“Yeah, I will!“, she exclaimed with a wide smile, “You’re the best uncle ever!“

She took off shortly after, but that didn’t change the fact that Five’s heart was melting. Only people who knew him would notice, but his expression softened by quite a bit. Derek stepped up next to him about a minute later.

“Okay…“, he hummed and readjusted his glasses, “I guess I was wrong about her reaction.“

Five quickly caught himself again, though he couldn’t stop smiling at that point. For a few seconds, he had forgotten that Derek was even there. But he was glad that he was there with him, so he didn’t have to face the overwhelming feelings alone.

“Come on. I know you have to go home soon, but let’s at least grab some peanut butter muffins“, Five said before pulling him along to the tables that were designated for food. After all those years, he still enjoyed peanut butter and marshmallows quite a bit.

Derek chuckled and followed along. “Look, I know you plan on drinking with your siblings later“, he said once they sat down together, Five’s legs resting on his lap, “But please don’t overdo it, we both have work tomorrow.“

The older man rolled his eyes. Despite their age difference, their relationship was relatively evened out in terms of power. They both had to adapt to the other’s needs and most often, it worked. Not all the time though.

“Just because I threw up in your potted plant once?“, Five pouted, but looked away after Derek gave him a glare that could level mountains, “Fine. One drink, I won’t go overboard. You’re right, I don’t want to be hungover at work.“

That sentence seemed to satisfy his partner, who focused on watching Diego help his daughter break her piñata. Derek fully trusted Five’s promises, knowing that his boyfriend would keep his word.

———————————

He went home after the party was over, while Five headed to a restaurant with his siblings. Sometimes, Derek was teased for his perfectionism. But despite a few instances of staying up late to finish up a case, he did his best to get the recommended six to eight hours of sleep. Five had only joked about it once, quickly shutting up after hearing Derek’s answer: “You act like I choose to feel this way. But like this, I at least feel like I have a little bit of control over my life and it makes me feel better.“

———————————

Upon waking up after exactly seven hours and fifteen minutes, Derek felt betrayed for just a few seconds. His partner had promised to only have one drink. Yet upon looking at Five, he seemed to be suffering from a massive hangover. His skin was covered in a thin layer of sweat, he was shaking like a leaf, while at the same time seemingly fighting both nausea and a pounding headache. In short, Five felt absolutely miserable.

“You promised me to keep yourself under control“, Derek told him as he sat up from his own bed to walk over. Yet as he approached the other bed, he noticed how glassy Five’s eyes were and that despite the accusatory tone in his voice, his partner barely reacted. He even managed to place a hand on Five’s forehead, where he was immediately met with one revelation.

“Oh no…you’re burning up“, he mostly whispered to himself and went to walk into the bathroom to get supplies. However, Five stopped him from doing so by grabbing his wrist, effectively keeping his hand pressed against his hot forehead.

“Don’t leave…“, Five mumbled, the usual collected tone gone, “You feel so nice and…cold.“

If it weren’t for the fact that Derek was incredibly worried, he would have found the situation almost adorable. Never before had he seen Five lean into his touch like this, rubbing his forehead against Derek’s palm like a cat, though he didn’t purr. A clear sign that something wasn’t okay. Five only sought out touch when he wasn’t doing well at all, like after a particular bad nightmare or after getting injured. And his partner had experienced both, but he hadn’t seen him get sick before, that was a first.

Derek sighed heavily, allowing Five to use him as an icepack for another minute before he carefully pulled away.

“Mr.Five“, he used their nickname in an attempt to lighten the mood, “You’re sick. I’m just going to get up to gather some things, okay? I’ll be back before you know it.“

———————————

Instead of a proper response, Five groaned in discomfort. He decided to take that as a yes nonetheless, making his way towards their medicine cabinet. Derek had never experienced something like this before and if he was being honest with himself, he didn’t like having no real power to help Five. All he could do was fight the symptoms, hoping his partner would recover on his own. So for once, he decided to recruit some help, picking up his phone. Most of the siblings were out of the question, they all had work or their kids to worry about. However, there was one who should be around that time of day.

Derek: Hey, could you buy some soup and stop by my place? Five isn’t doing so well.

He expected to have to wait for a few minutes, but the answer came surprisingly fast.

Klaus: I’m on it!

Derek let out a small sigh of relief upon reading that response. At least he wouldn’t have to leave Five to make some soup or go to the store and buy some. He really admired how Klaus had turned his life around, according to his siblings at least. It must have taken quite a bit of will power and for that, he deserved respect in his opinion.

The younger man quickly shook off that thought, returning to Five’s bedside. His partner seemed to be a bit more awake, but still looked quite miserable. And yet, he hadn’t gotten up, which was a plus. He probably wouldn’t be able to keep himself upright.

“Open your mouth“, Derek gently encouraged him, sliding in a thermometer once Five followed the command. While they waited out the results, he began to wipe his sweaty and hot skin down with a damp towel. The coldness of the cloth caused Five to shiver, yet he leaned into it immediately. All while his glassy green eyes attempted to focus on Derek’s face, which was scrunched up with worry. Even though he had grown up a lot since arriving in the reset timeline, Five couldn’t help but feel like a child again. Back then, he had gotten sick more often, with Grace taking care of him in a very similar way. Whenever he had gotten sick in the apocalypse or Commission, he had tried to imagine that tender touch attempting to ease his pain. But in that instance, he didn’t have to use his imagination. Derek was there, gently brushing his damp hair into place. The beeping of the thermometer caused them both to flinch.

Derek bit his lip as he glanced at the numbers flashing back at him. The fever wasn’t incredibly high just yet, but it worried him nonetheless.

“Here, you should drink this“, he attempted to both distract himself and keep Five hydrated, helping him sit up before he grabbed the cup. And despite how utterly miserable, weak and sick the oldest Hargreeves felt, his nose scrunched up once he identified the liquid.

“I’m not drinking tea or any other hot leaf juice type“, Five mumbled and tried to turn away from him. He wanted coffee, but knew at the same time that his partner wouldn’t let him have it.

Derek groaned quietly and walked around the bed to face his partner once more. “You need to drink something. This should help you.“

Both of them were incredibly stubborn, though Five most often won when it came to a battle of will power. Yet now, absolutely exhausted, he didn’t have the energy to fight. So after a lot of pressure from Derek’s side, he began to take small sips of tea, until the mug was empty and his partner set it back down. Just as Five was starting to doze off a bit, the doorbell rang, causing him to flinch from the sudden noise.

“It’s okay, I’ll get it“, Derek quickly reassured him and walked down the hall to answer the door. As expected, Klaus was on the other side, wearing a face mask and holding a container with apparently homemade soup.

“Hi, Wesley“, Klaus smiled underneath his mask and gave him a small wave, “Not in a suit today? Wow, Fünf must really not be doing so swell.“

Derek chuckled at the nicknames, looking down at himself. With Five sick, he had no time to change out of his sleeping attire or properly style his hair, causing it to poof up. At least he was wearing his glasses.

“Good morning, Klaus“, he greeted him back, leaning against the doorframe to hide how nervous he felt, “Five is really not doing so well, not sure what he has. You didn’t have to make soup though, store bought would have been fine.“

Klaus hummed as he handed over the container, clearing his throat a bit. “Actually, Dave made that soup for dinner two days ago. Really soaked up all of that good flavour“, he grinned, which Derek was able to see from the way the skin by his eyes wrinkled, “Plus, our Mom used to make us chicken noodle soup when we were sick.“

While he was suffering from a mild germaphobia, Klaus mainly wore the mask because he sometimes volunteered at a hospital. And he really didn’t want to get sick people with comprimised immune systems even more sick.

“That’s…really kind of you“, Derek admitted, a lot of tension leaving his body as he held onto the container, “Thank you so much, it means a lot.“

Klaus nodded slowly, looking him over from the bottom of his house shoes to the top of his fluffy blonde hair. “No, I should be thanking you, Harry Potter. You’re the one taking care of Five and he obviously likes you quite a lot. I know the old man can be quite a lot sometimes. Speaking of…how do you deal with him?“

Derek blinked slowly as he processed that question. For a minute, he stayed silent, then looked back up at Klaus. “We just…complete eachother. Sure, sometimes we have to move a bit for the other so to speak, but I love him for who he is, just like he loves me. I’m used to an age difference. I fell in love with his soul, not his body, and so did he.“

To his surprise, Klaus didn’t seem amused by it or tried to make a joke about his words. Instead, he just seemed moved. “Awww…That’s good, I’m glad for you too. Tell Five that I hope he gets better soon and to keep you, okay? You really fit in well“, he winked before leaving again.

For a few moments after he had left, Derek stayed frozen, smiling a little bit. Those words meant more to him than he cared to admit. But before he could think about it further, he decided to warm up the soup and check on his partner again.

———————————

Five had dozed off again after the sound of the doorbell had echoed through their appartment, but woke up when the smell of chicken noodle soup entered his nostrils. “Mom?“, he mumbled, slightly delirious from the fever.

“Not quite“, Derek replied, a soft smile on his lips as he sat down, a steaming bowl of soup in his hands, “How are you feeling, Mr.Five?“

Five groaned as he sat up properly, pushing himself up himself instead of letting his partner help. Yet he couldn’t help it as he leaned against Derek’s chest as a makeshift pillow. It soothed his pounding headache a bit. “Like someone ran me over with a bulldozer“, he answered him quietly, opening his mouth for the first spoonful of soup. Picking up the spoon himself felt incredibly exhausting and for once, he didn’t mind how vulnerable he was.

Derek hummed, feeding him half of the bowl before he set it aside and shifted slightly, wanting Five to be as comfortable as possible.

“Whatever it is you have…you should probably get some rest. Just sleep a bit, I’ll stay right here with you. I already called out sick for both of us“, he whispered into his ears, even daring to kiss his partner‘s temple. After waiting for a response for a bit, he noticed that Five had fallen asleep, propped up against Derek’s chest and one arm loosely wrapped around him. For the sake of letting him sleep, he decided against moving.

———————————

About three hours later, Five’s temperature had dropped down to a less worrying level. When he woke up though, the feeling of sickness was replaced by something strange…yet familiar at the same time. After sitting up, Derek didn’t even get the chance to ask if he was feeling any better. Because with one sneeze, Five disappeared in a flash of blueish purple light.

He landed hard on the cold white floor of a subway station. His nausea and headache flared in a way that he had never before experienced in his entire life, making the time he lost his arm appear like a school trip.

 “What the hell…“, Five mumbled upon spotting strange symbols written on the walls, only to get pulled through space yet again, landing on his bed once more. Derek had apparently stood up in the few seconds that had passed, staring at him in complete and utter shock, but also confusion.

“What the hell?!“, he echoed the earlier sentence, only much louder. He wasn’t exactly scared of Five, but he had no idea what was happening and humans generally didn’t react well to the unknown. A few times before, Five had mentioned time travel and teleportation, though it had never really raised Derek’s alarm bells. After all, his partner had graduated with a degree in quantum physics while he had still been a teenager. But he had never fully explained the story of his siblings and their powers, afraid of what Derek would think.

Five let out a groan of pain and discomfort, fighting down the upcoming nausea. His entire body felt drained from the telelport, in a way he hadn’t experienced in many years. Slowly, he opened his eyes to look at Derek, taking a shaky breath.

“Look…I don’t fully know what’s going on“, his hair fell into his eyes and he brushed it away without much care, “But I’ll do my best to explain.“

———————————

About thirty minutes later, Derek nodded slowly as he paced back and forth. He believed his partner, despite how crazy it sounded. Even though Five didn’t tell him everything, he always told him the truth. They had insisted on that rule, so he wasn’t angry, just overwhelmed.

“But if the universe reset“, Derek finally uttered his first words since his initial exclamation, “Why do you have your powers back?“

That question hit Five like a punch to the face. While explaining, he had been too focused on making sure Derek understood everything and that his sentences actually made sense. The headache made that last part a bit harder than expected.

“I…I…“, Five stuttered and pulled his knees up to his chest, a sign that the potential answer terrified him, “I don’t know…Maybe the reset didn’t fully work…Oh God…maybe that means the apocalypse is coming back! I’m not ready for that, I can’t go through that again! I can’t bear the sight of my dead family for the fifth time! I don’t want to loose you too, now that I finally found someone who completes me and makes me feel alive!“

He was spiraling so hard, Five didn’t even notice that he was screaming his thoughts aloud, tears running down his face. A panic attack was something his pounding head couldn’t fully handle and he was starting to hyperventilate.

Derek quickly sat down in front of him. “Five, listen to me“, he said firmly, attempting to get him to focus, “It’s going to be alright, we’ll figure this out together.“

Once he noticed that the normal strategy wasn’t working, he decided to change course. While he kept reassuring Five, he pulled him into a gentle hug, hoping that the contact would help. It was a 50/50 chance, but he was fully willing to take that risk. Shortly after his arms wrapped around him, Five hugged him back as if his life depended on it. His tears stained Derek’s sleeping shirt, yet neither of them particularly cared about that. They just kept holding on, both of their respective rants echoing through their minds like a melody.

I don’t want to loose you too, now that I finally found someone who completes me and makes me feel alive!

It’s going to be alright, we’ll figure this out together.

———————————

The next day, Five still didn’t feel too well. But he had recovered enough to leave his bed and visit his siblings with Derek by his side, where it was revealed that the world wasn’t ending. Which was both a relief and a cause of anger for Five.

“You stole from Dad and spiked our drinks?!“, he exclaimed and Derek had to actively hold him back so Five wouldn’t try to strangle Ben, who looked even worse for wear. And even though Derek didn’t have to use as much force as usual, it was still more than one would expect for someone as exhausted as Five.

“Please, Mr.Five“, he practically pleaded, “Relax a bit and sit down.“

To everyone’s surprise, Five did settle down a few seconds later, crossing his arms in front of his chest. Normally, he probably would have put up more of a fight.

Luther stared at Derek, then Five, his eyes wide open. He did look exhausted as well, but was able to keep Sloane from floating to the ceiling by holding onto her ankle. “Wow. You gotta teach us how to do that. He’s never done that with any of us.“

Diego nodded quickly as well, immediately regretting that decision when a wave of pain shot through his head. None of them felt good, except for Klaus maybe. “Yeah. I have three kids, who all got their stubbornness from me and Lila. How do you do that?“

In response, Derek blushed a bit, readjusting his glasses ever so slightly. He looked as unassuming as possible. “Well…he sometimes holds me back too, when it’s necessary, so it evens out.“

Before anyone could ask what he possibly meant by that, Five let out a groan next to him. A sign that the nausea was back at full force, disorientating him beyond measure. But as soon as Derek placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder, everything went downhill.

———————————

Never before had the blonde teleported and it was a sensation that took some time to get used to. Suddenly, his world got turned upside down, so much so that he could no longer determine whether his feet were touching solid ground. As for his vision, for a small moment he couldn’t see anything, then for just a split second, he could see stars. Never before had he seen so many stars in the sky, he felt like he was facing the infinity of the universe as time seemed to have lost its meaning. Until, as suddenly as they had disappeared, the reappeared in the strange subway station.

While Derek still tried to come to grips with what happened, Five recovered a bit faster. After all, he had teleported before many times. No matter how much he tried though, he couldn’t bring himself to do it again.

“Shit…“, he cursed under his breath, just before helping his partner with sitting up, “We have a problem.“

———————————

After about ten minutes of recovery time and senseless walking around the station, Derek took a deep breath. He was close to having a panic attack and he refused to let himself get tipped over the edge. Not with Five already freaking out over everything.

“I say we get in the train, see where it takes us“, he announced and made his way towards the open doors. Derek could be extremely stubborn when he wanted to, just like his partner. And in that moment, his tone indicated that he was in no mood for protest. It was a tone that rarely ever came out.

Five groaned, but followed him onto the train. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t the least bit curious. Plus, he couldn’t leave Derek alone. “You have no idea where this will take us“, he mumbled, unaware that this would be a longer trip than expected.

As soon as they stepped out of the station, they were confronted with burning rubble and collapsed buildings. Five’s grip on Derek’s hand tightened a bit more as he did his best to stay in the present.

“This doesn’t look too good“, he whispered, kneeling down as he spotted an arm sticking out of a hill made out of metal pipes and concrete. And while there wasn’t an umbrella tattoo this time, he recognised the watch around the wrist as the one he was wearing every single day.

Meanwhile, Derek slowly looked around. A strange feeling began to wash over him, but he couldn’t quite place it. It was as if the entire world around him seemed out of place entirely. He reached up to scratch the back of his neck, grimacing as the itch refused to go away. No matter how hard he scratched at his skin, to the point that it turned red, it didn’t get better.

“Derek, are you alright?“, Five asked him, but didn’t really look up as he attempted to move the rubble aside. He was too focused to really split his attention.

“Yeah, of course“, his partner found himself saying almost instantly, even though he most definitely wasn’t feeling alright at all. His mouth had gone dry, his saliva no longer doing its job, so he was yearning for water. At the same time, sweat began to trickle down his neck and temple, even though he definitely didn’t feel hot at all.

Finally, Five looked up, his eyes widening ever so slightly. Even though not all of the signs were present, there were enough for him to recognise it. He had gone through it himself after all.

“We need to leave, now!“, he exclaimed, just as the first bullet cut through the air, hitting the wall behind him, “Before you shoot us!“

Derek took cover right next to Five, daring to glance around the corner. And between the rubble, he could spot…himself. Sure, he was no longer wearing his tie, his glasses were cracked and his face dirtied with ash, but it was definitely him. “How is this possible?!“, he exclaimed as they made their way back into the station, avoiding bullets as they did so.

Five took a few shaky breaths, pulling him back into the train as quickly as possible. He was still exhausted from the teleportation earlier. “If I had to guess, that was an alternate timeline. One in which I died, the apocalypse happened and you survived somehow.“

After hearing that, Derek stayed quiet for a few minutes. He knew about the existence of timelines, but knowing about something and seeing something was quite different. After about ten minutes though, he suddenly broke the silence again. “Oh no…We just passed our stop, the train just keeps going!“

Almost instantly, Five paled, trying anything to get the train to stop. But he couldn’t find anything, teleporting was still something his body couldn’t handle and the windows refused to break.

“Shit...“, they both said at the same time, just as the doors opened again and they entered a new station.

———————————

Despite working with files and complicated cases evey day, navigating the subway map took them a lot of time. Every time they thought they had cracked the code, they were proved wrong. And unlike Five, Derek had never fought for his own survival on such a primal level. So things like making a fire, building a shelter or preserving clean water were all things that he had to learn.

Fortunately though, Derek was good at hunting animals, either by building traps or with a weapon. So they were able to get some food, even if they landed in timelines that had long turned into worlds without any humans in it.

However, not all stations lead to those kind of timelines. After about two years of aimlessly wandering through the subway, they stepped out of the train once more. They hadn’t completely abandoned their suits just yet, but had been forced to put on some old coats, as it often got quite cold.

“This is seems promising“, Derek dared to say as they stepped out of the station. The buildings were still standing and the air was clear of ash. Not everything was as good as it seemed though.

“Look out!“, Five exclaimed and lunged at him, just as a gunshot echoed through the air. They were used to making a quick escape at that point, so they barely had to think about it as they fled down the stairs and back into the train. “Woah…That was a close one.“

Derek had stayed strangely quiet during their escape, the only sound that came from him was his heavy breathing. “Mister Five?“, he whispered, his voice barely above a whisper and quite strained. His upper arm was shaking beyond belief, a dark red patch slowly spreading across his sleeve.

Never before had two words affected Five that much. His vision tunnelled on the blood, as well as the gunshot wound on Derek’s right upper arm. “No…no, no, no, shit!“, he exclaimed, his fingers hastily pulling off his tie to use as a turniquet. He had never cared much when he himself had gotten injured, but when it came to people he cared about, he felt almost paralysed.

“Hey, hey, look at me“, he almost commanded, placing one hand on Derek’s cheek, “No going into shock, Mister. Here, drink this.“

He shakily pulled out a flask from his leather satchel, forcing his partner to take a swig before taking a sip himself.

Derek had previously been dissociating into a state of shock, the pain burning like a hot iron but it had still been not enough to keep him awake. However, as soon as his tastebuds registered what the liquid inside of the flask was, he found himself wide awake and disgusted.

“Ew!“, he exclaimed, not even noticing as his partner tightened the turniquet a bit, “Is that coffee?!“

Five nodded, leaning back and taking another sip. He still had to stop the bleeding and check whether the bullet had gone through or not, but for just a second, he could relax. “You need to stay awake, keep the adrenaline up. This was the best way.“

Just for a moment, both of them laughed. It wasn’t light laughter by any means, but it was a small break from the constant danger and hopelessness.

———————————

Keeping track of time inside of the subway was tough. There was no day and night cycle, Five’s watch had given up after about a year and their sleeping schedule wasn’t regular by any means. So they had to rely on Five’s sense of time, which he possessed due to the nature of his powers.

“How long has it been?“, Derek asked one day, his head leaned against his partner’s shoulder as they waited for the water to boil. The right lense of his glasses had cracked, though he desperately tried to keep it together. It was the only sense of normalcy he had retained.

“Six years, four months and twelve days“, Five mumbled, his eyes loosely closed. He barely had to think about it anymore, the numbers burned into his mind.

Derek hummed quietly and reached into the depth of his pockets, only to frown when he touched something he had long forgotten about. He had bought it before they had ended up in the subway system, which felt like an eternity ago.

“Mr.Five?“, he asked with a smile, which caused his partner to open his eyes and look at him, “Once we get out of here…I don’t want to spend a day without you. And I know you find it cheesy, but will you marry me?“

He carefully pulled out the box from his pocket, revealing the silver ring that held five emeralds, similar to Five’s deep green eyes. Even though he had thought about those words for six years, Derek couldn’t help but feel incredibly nervous.

Five’s eyes resembled saucers once he looked at the ring for the first time. He had been married before, but back then, he had been the one to propose. And even though he was a dangerous killer, he found himself blushing like a teenage girl getting asked out by her crush.

“I…“, he stuttered for a moment, then nodded quickly, trying to quickly wipe the tears away, “Yes, I will marry you. I’ll get us out of here, I promise, we will have a wedding.“

Normally, Derek was the one who mainly initiated the touches. But this time, Five pulled him in for a kiss as soon as the ring found its place on his finger. He almost seemed hungry for any sort of touch, holding onto his collar and only pulling away once they both needed to breathe. The sweet moment of affection was interrupted by a Eureka moment.

“I got it!“, Five exclaimed, grabbing Derek’s left arm as to not accidentally hurt him by digging his fingers into his old wound, “I know how to get back!“

Derek barely had time to ask him any questions. They were both overwhelmed by emotions and the thought of getting back far too overpowering. “Let’s go then!“, he grinned, something he hadn’t done in quite a while.

———————————

It took them a while to go through the combination of stations, but after about an hour, they made it. With one teleportation, they found themselves back in the academy. Five’s siblings seemed to have left, but not much time had passed at all, a few hours at the most.

“We did it…“, Derek whispered breathlessly, allowing himself to fall onto the couch next to his fiancé, “We made it back.“

Five nodded, taking a deep breath as the realisation hit him. For a while, he looked at the ring on his hand, a faint smile appearing on his face. “How about we go home, take a shower, change…have some coffee?“, he suggested and offered him his hand.

Derek nodded and readjusted his glasses before he took the offered hand.

“Or tea.“

-----------------------------

I hope you enjoyed this chapter and story! This will most likely be the last one, since I'm not good at writing weddings and I quite like how this ended. If you have any sort of suggestions for other stories, oneshots, whatever, let me know. As always, leave some likes or comments, they make my day. Thank all of you so much for the love you gave this story of mine, it means so much to me. Until next time, -Donna Lawliet

[donnalawliet]

Here is the third and final chapter of the Coffee or Tea story! I hope you enjoy it.

———————————

Five and Derek grow closer, through good and bad times.

———————————

[donnalawliet]

i'm curious about your thoughts on the dinner scene from when vanya is being interrogated, like you mentioned, five stayed silent and didn't eat anything while everyone else did

SOME THOUGHTS ON FIVE’S BEHAVIOR AT THE LSD DINNER TABLE THAT MAY OR MAY NOT MAKE SENSE CAUSE IT’S 3AM AND I HAD LIKE 1 FOOD

Ok first of all, i have no idea what it means, but before Vanya arrives, he has his head down, not looking at Ben either, just. staring down, not wanting to be there (also in the close up shot his hands are shaking)

When r*ginald is speaking, five is blocking him out, distracting himself with his hands.

- Hunched over from the stress and pressure he’s been under for so long / isn’t in the line with his siblings / doesn’t fit in (posture problems from being hit on his back with a cane?)

- Five might’ve been the one r*ginald was targeting the most during his stay there- loud, smart and disobedient, something that had to be eliminated

- The only one who has his hands on the table; it’s an act of rebellion against their father, while also being the one most similar to him out of the siblings

- Hands together- traumas are more complex and connected / desire to keep the siblings together / hands are tied

- the only one to look at vanya entirely, treating her like an equal.

Fuck if i know why he stayed silent, only looking impatient, possibly because he was away for majority of his siblings lives, practically being a ghost from the past. Perhaps it was the same reason why vanya in the finale of s1 didn’t have any flashbacks of him being mean to her.

- Moves the most freely out of the siblings; rolled sleeves to show he’s not playing tricks (also putting a napkin on his lap which i have no idea what it means but Manners TM)

- looks like he wanted to say something to vanya, but was cut off by reginald / ‘s creation (grace showing her robot side to five), denied a chance to speak by something outside of his control

- Him and vanya are the only people whose plate had to be adjusted, not in the right frame of mind, r*ginald having to “fix” their behavior (vanya with the broken monocle incident, five with his attitude)

((I may have a theory that no rights r*ggie didn’t tell five to start with seconds when it came to time travel because when physical abuse stopped being effective, r*ginald had to come up with something else and he knew five would try to do it and would fail to come back; it was a punishment for getting out of line))

- Didn’t look too happy about eating his brain either; doesn’t seem to be eating, just cutting it, choosing which parts of his mind to interact with while blissfully ignoring the rest, but appearing to do so, this seeming fine

He’s having trouble with his memories too; Childhood PTSD from back in the academy- forms from weeks to a few years after the incident, while he was 4 decades in the apocalypse. PTSD makes you forget stuff, most of the traumatic years actually, except some memories here and there, but your body reacts anyway.

Plus compared to the apocalypse the stay in the academy wasn’t “that bad”, despite being physically and mentally abused. He might not remember most of it, but his body still has the responses, mainly see s2 ep 2, 4 and 6 for direct reaction to veggie. Also seeing the uniform for the first time back in ep1, which definitely brought back up some unpleasant memories

- He’s the only person to take a drink, splashing down the brain / suggesting to vanya to do the same. Despite not saying anything, it may be a little try to be helpful

Needs an outside influence to deal with the trauma and what happened, he’s not able to process it all on his own, because his judgement is clouded.

If you don’t remember most of what happened and had bigger problems on your hands your entire life, how are you supposed to care about what actually happens to your mind

- While the rest is judging and laughing at Vanya, he looks concerned and worried, blinking as if he saw something too ; looks tired, dark circles under his eyes, but still looks at vanya to check if she’s fine, putting his family above him

In conclusion: someone help him.

[donnalawliet]

How I feel after a whole day of having to talk to people, with my social battery at 0%, ready to not interact with anyone for a week:

[donnalawliet]

I feel so honoured by this! I never had any of my fanfics called out in such a thoughtful post and I really appreciate it.

Thank you so much, both for the thoughts on Five‘s potential relationship and your call out.

”I felt that Five had to have a love story”

No he didn’t. A character does not need a love interest to be a developed or fulfilled character. Five was really special to many of the fans due to this fact. He was a big comfort to the ace community. And just ripping that representation (intentional or not) away from us just feels cruel.

But here we are. My only concern now is how they did it. Did they not know that when deciding to give him a love interest you DO NOT MAKE HIM FALL IN LOVE WITH HIS BROTHER’S WIFE?!?!

There are so many better ways they could have done this. Here are some ideas that I personally would have preferred:

1. GIVE US BACK OUR BEAUTIFUL DOLORES. I would have loved a deep dive into Five’s feelings for her now that he’s “safe”. Him realising that she was a coping mechanism and him trying to figure out his own feelings towards the situation.

Or

2. HEAR ME OUT ON THIS ONE. A coworkers to lovers trope. We could have had Five be in love with Derek (the twink agent we meet in ep 1) but hating it because he doesn’t know how to process his own emotions. Give me Five who doesn’t know how to talk about (or process) his feelings with anyone except his family. I would have loved to see Five branch out and make real connections with people in the new timeline.

We could have seen him heal. Yet all we got was a badly made ship that destroyed multiple developed relationships. Why go out with a bang if you can go out with an apocalypse of what was?

[donnalawliet]

In what sports category did Reginald Hargreeves get an Olympic gold medal?

Wrong answers only.

(based off that line from Grace in S1)

[donnalawliet]

I wrote a second chapter for this, with a kinda happy ending, because I can‘t let a oneshot stay a oneshot to save my life.

It‘s also my attempt at a S4 fix it, so check it out!

Yet another fic in which Five gets together with Derek, his CIA colleague, instead of Lila. This takes place during Season 4.

Together, Five and Derek investigate Sy Grossman and the Keepers. However, what they find out only caused pain and a tragedy that could have been avoided.

(This starts as fluff, but ends with pure angst, no happy ending here.)

[donnalawliet]

If Five was the last human left alive in the apocalypse and had to survive off of food like cockroaches (suggesting that there were no bigger animals left around either)…what did he have a sniper rifle for?

What would he use it on? He clearly didn‘t expect the Handler (or his older self) to stop by, yet he had it right next to him at all times. Why?

[donnalawliet]

Just rewatched B99 after rewatching TUA and I realised…

Eudora Patch and Diego Hargreeves are just an alternative version of Amy Santiago and Jake Peralta. One that didn‘t reconcile, get married and have a child.

Now I‘m imagining if it was the other way around.

Jake telling Amy to “try things his way“, only for her to die in his arms.

Diego realising that growing up is necessary and he doesn‘t have to appeal to his father even after moving out, slowly growing closer with Eudora again.

What if it was the other way around?

[donnalawliet]

Me when I create a new OC:

I'm curious--how do you guys go about creating your OCs?

[donnalawliet]

My pinterest for you page currently consists of The Umbrella Academy and Game of Thrones. And while scrolling, a thought popped into my head.

Five becoming a faceless assassin, giving up literally anything in the House of Black and White as he becomes more of a killer…but still going back to save his family before he can truly become No One, just like Arya.

[donnalawliet]

Don't make promises you can't keep (Derek x Five oneshot)

Yet another fic in which Five gets together with Derek, his CIA colleague, instead of Lila. This takes place during Season 4. Together, Five and Derek investigate Sy Grossman and the Keepers. However, what they find out only caused pain and a tragedy that could have been avoided. (This starts as fluff, but ends with pure angst, no happy ending here.)

Warning: Character Death and Depictions of Violence.

——————————————

Whenever Five went out for a mission, Derek couldn’t help but worry a little bit. Sure, Five was experienced, hardened by years of surviving in an apocalypse and working as an assassin, not to mention passing the CIA training with flying colours. But despite all of that, the worry remained.

By no means did the younger man panic or pace in his office, that would have been pointless and stopped him from doing actual work while he waited for his partner to return. However, he found himself glancing at his watch more often, checking the clock on the wall to make sure it was accurate.

The Keepers case that Five had picked up didn’t seem that dangerous either. Just a support group that had the potential of turning into a cult, nothing new. The United States were full of people like them, though they all had different goals and intentions.

The organising principle made the Keepers interesting, hence why Five investigated them. Derek had oftentimes asked his boyfriend why he insisted on this case, especially because he could have almost any case he asked for. For quite a while, Five refused to answer that question, until one night.

——————————————

Derek had been laying on the couch, his head resting against his partner’s knee so he wouldn’t have to lay down flat. They had been watching Pride and Prejudice , though neither of them remembered the version.

“Why don’t you drop the Keepers case and go after something more interesting?“, he had asked him, half expecting Five to not bother with an answer. But surprisingly, Five sighed and leaned back, brushing his longer hair behind his ears. His eyes remained fixed on the screen.

“Because I have a gut feeling. There is something more, I know it. And I’m so close to finding out what. How about we don’t question each other’s gut, okay?“

His tone told Derek immediately that Five was serious. And he was right, almost every agent at the CIA knew that one shouldn’t question a gut feeling. Oftentimes, pure logic wasn’t the way to go during a mission and the first instinct shouldn’t be ignored. Even though Derek had often thought of his boyfriend as the pure logical type, he had been proven wrong before. Five had a deeply caring and empathetic side.

He just refused to show it openly, it only came out when he was around people he truly loved. At first, that had only been his family. But eventually, he had started to do the same with Derek.

It was quite endearing to him, listening to Five quote Shakespeare or Homer, in the original Greek of course, whenever he had trouble falling asleep. The oldest Hargreeves showed his affection by bringing him tea when he was working late, by threatening their co-workers that dared to disrespect him based of how he looked.

And so, Derek nodded slowly in agreement.

“Okay. I won’t question yours, you won’t question mine. We’ll trust each other on this“, Derek had replied with a smile and they had gone back to watching the movie. Ever since that day, that promise had persisted.

——————————————

Whenever Five prepared to leave for his undercover missions, Derek insisted on a goodbye kiss in the privacy of their shared office before he could leave the building. And even though Five shrugged it off as stupid at first, he eventually stopped questioning it. Instead, he actively looked forward to their goodbye ritual.

Never had he received an answer as to why Derek did it. Though the answer was quite simple: Just in case Five didn’t come back, Derek wanted their last interaction to be one of affection, not one of normalcy, overshadowed by the fear of not seeing the other alive ever again.

After hours of waiting for his partner to return, Derek could no longer feel the familiar warmth on his lips. He was stuck waiting and catching up on paperwork, reworking the report for the tenth time. It had a calming effect on him, to fill out documents and scratch off another point from his list. Finally, Derek got a text from Five, telling him that he was on his way.

And that was enough to send him into motion. Almost like clockwork, Derek closed the file that contained Five’s report on the Keepers, picking it up from his neatly organised desk. He had already set Five’s three piece suit to the side. While his undercover clothes fulfilled their purpose and Derek even liked the mustache…they couldn’t present their findings to Director Ribbons like that.

Once he had gathered everything, Derek quickly glanced in the mirror to readjust his tie and glasses. He didn’t want anyone to think that he was slacking off after all.

——————————————

Upon entering, Five spotted Derek almost immediately in the corner of his eye.

“You’re late“, his boyfriend reminded him, but his tone held no accusation. It was a simple statement and reminder. While he said that, Five extended his hand to take the offered suit. He couldn’t wait to change out of the Top Gun attire and get back into proper clothing that made him feel as though people took him seriously.

“I know“, Five sighed softly and under his breath, so quiet that only his partner could hear it, he mumbled two more words: “Thank you.“

Not a lot of people got to hear these words from him. Maybe as a result of his father rarely thanking anyone for their effort. But Five had tried recently to do it more, he didn’t want to end up like his old man after all.

As they walked next to each other, making their way towards the stairs together, Derek looked Five over with a soft smile. He was glad that he had made it back safe and that he could finally relax a bit more. The rest of the day was going to go along smoothly.

“Mustache“, he reminded him, unable to keep the slight amusement out of his voice. Even though he valued his professionalism, sometimes right after returning from a mission, he found it adorable how his partner could forget about small details.

“Right.“ A light blush appeared on Five’s face as he reached up, removing the fake mustache from his face and handing it over in exchange for the file in Derek’s hands. They had to hurry a bit more, they both knew that. There was no time for exchanging pleasantries.

“He’s waiting in his office“, Derek told him as they jogged up the stairs in unison. Neither of them liked their boss very much, yet they had to tolerate him. If he approved the case, it would give them further freedom for investigation.

During the talk with Director Ribbons, Derek was forced to keep his mouth shut. He wasn’t a big fan of it, he wanted to help his partner…but ultimately, Five was the one that had to do the report. There was no other way, so Derek had to simply sit there, smile and listen. He paid attention to what was being said, yet that was all he could do.

——————————————

“Why did he not listen?“, he asked once the meeting was over, leading Five back to their office, “You are making progress on this. You got an invitation to a bigger meeting, that has to count for something!“

Five snorted quietly and set his report down. He had half expected an answer like this, but that didn’t mean he would give up. Once he had bitten down, he was like a shark. He refused to let go and he knew that Derek was the same. One of the reasons why he loved him.

“It’s fine. I’ll still go to that meeting, figure out what’s going on“, he pulled on his coat and yawned a bit, “But for today, I’m done. I have to be a good uncle, attend my niece’s birthday and make sure she doesn’t forget me.“

After all, Five had taken the CIA job with the intent of keeping his family safe. The reward was small, but he wasn’t going to miss out on it.

Derek sighed heavily, then nodded. He hadn’t met Five’s family in person yet, but he knew of course how important they were to him.

“Very well. I’ll finish up my paperwork, go to my book club meeting…we’ll see each other later, okay?“ His voice turned a bit softer now that they were alone and Derek carefully extended his hand towards him.

A small chuckle made its way past Five’s lips, but he still obliged the silent request. He took his boyfriend’s hand and placed a gentle kiss on his knuckles.

“Okay. See you tonight. Or in the morning, depends how long this will take.“

——————————————

It ended up taking much longer than anticipated. By the time Derek had finished up his meetings, prepared dinner for himself and the dog, Five still hadn’t come back. But that was no surprise to him, Keeper meetings tended to take a bit longer. Plus, he wasn’t going to deprive his boyfriend of valuable family time.

“Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, huh?“, he asked the dog, but Mr.Pennycrumb was already dozing on the bed, half buried underneath the blanket.

Derek sighed heavily and made his way into the bathroom for his evening routine, taking off his glasses before he showered, followed by washing his face and brushing his teeth. Five called it extensive sometimes, but it helped him sleep. He had already done plenty of reading at the book club, so Derek only managed a few pages before he yawned.

“Goodnight“, Derek whispered mostly to himself, turning off the lights before he curled up on his side of the bed. Just before sleep could completely pull him under, he faintly detected the sound of a door opening, the scent of sake and someone laying down next to him.

——————————————

The next morning, Five got up early. He was feeling miserable, but he chalked it up to the alcohol he had consumed the night before. No matter what, he would keep going. Derek was still asleep by the time he got ready and he didn’t feel like waking him up when he had at least one hour of sleep left. For a few minutes, he looked down at his boyfriend, resisting the urge to trace his soft features and brush a strand of stray hair out of his face.

Please don’t let the world end again, he thought to himself, smiling at Derek and his dog before walking into the kitchen. Five kept his breakfast simple, grabbing a piece of paper while he devoured his peanutbutter and marshmallow sandwich.

Investigate Sy Grossman, he proceeded to write down for Derek, Complete screening for any criminal records or suspicious activities, top to bottom.

After a moment of hesitation, Five added three more words: I love you.

——————————————

Upon arriving at work, Five continued to get worse. He was sweating, his head was pounding and no matter how much coffee he consumed, it didn’t get better. Not to mention that he felt as though his guts kept rearranging themselves. And yet, he kept pushing forward. While Derek was busy with the background check, he looked through the files that they already had on him.

“Come on, there has gotta be something“, he mumbled and picked up his cup. The projected slides kept changing and it became more difficult for him to keep up.

Derek entered his office a few seconds later, holding a copy of Sy Grossman’s files in his arms. He had woken up without Five by his side and had immediately gotten to work after finding his note. And while he wasn’t angry by any means, he was a bit confused. Five hadn’t given him any additional explanation about why he wanted further information. However, with his Keeper’s meeting the previous evening, it wasn’t hard for Derek to guess a rough connection.

“Sy Grossman? He checks out. He’s a legit taxpayer“, Derek told him, a bit frustrated that he had found nothing. Not even the tiniest criminal record to speak of, which didn’t help them at all.

“Well, I’ll be damned“, Five mumbled and went to stand up just as Derek turned to leave. In the next second, something rather peculiar happened. One second Five was there, in the next he found himself in a strange subway…before suddenly getting transported back into his chair. That occurence was almost enough to give him whiplash. He was used to a lot of things, but never before had his stomach flipped so much. It was truly disorienting, to the point that he barely registered Derek was speaking to him.

“Five!“, Derek repeated, almost in a pleading way, “Are you feeling okay? What’s going on?“

Never before had he seen his boyfriend like this and it worried him. Five rarely got sick and even when he did, he never let it show or allowed anyone to take care of him. So when Five grunted in pain upon pushing himself up, Derek got close to calling a doctor.

“No…I don’t think I am okay“, Five mumbled and grabbed his coat, “Tell the director that I’m taking a sick day.“

Before he could leave though, a firm hand on his shoulder stopped him. They were usually around the same height, but with the strange sickness forcing him to hunch over, Derek seemed much taller all of the sudden.

“Tell me what’s going on with you.“

In all the years that they had known each other, Derek had rarely sounded commanding. It was generally not in his nature to do so. He worked in the background, did what was necessary while keeping a lot of his thoughts to himself until they became relevant. And Five liked that about him.

“I don’t know it either“, Five admitted and pulled himself out of his grip, attempting to straighten up, “But I need to talk to my family. Please, you have to let me do this. Do more research on the Keepers and Sy Grossman…I have a gut feeling.“

Derek bit his lip hard enough for it to almost start bleeding. He was unsure what he should do next. Attempting to stop Five could end quite badly. They had promised each other to not question a gut feeling.

“Please…promise me that you’ll come back and be okay“, Derek whispered, not stepping aside just yet. He was still blocking the exit so the other man couldn’t get out. Once Five nodded, he stepped aside though, letting him kiss his cheek before leaving again.

——————————————

For a few seconds, Derek stayed where he was, then took a deep breath.

“Screw it…I have a gut feeling too“, he mumbled to himself and opened the file. In his previous research, he had asked the corresponding department to do the background check on Sy Grossman. A normal agent rarely did all of the research himself, it would take far too long. But Derek couldn’t shake the thought that something about that man was…off. And not just because Five had asked him to look into it.

So he decided to start from square one, throwing himself into the work ahead. Despite looking like an innocent lamb most of the time, in moments like these, Derek acted like a wolf. He identified his prey, bit down and refused to let go until it gave him what he wanted.

It took him multiple hours, two broken pencils, six cups of tea and an entire notebook full of speculations, but eventually, Derek leaned back in triumph. Something was definitely off with Sy Grossman. A few weeks ago, he had gotten a tattoo at a parlor in Red Deer. Just before that, his dry cleaning shop had closed for a so called vacation.

But that was most definitely out of character, because Sy was a practicing muslim, belonging to a branch that openly condemned tattoos or other permanent body modification. It was a small detail, but enough for Derek’s alarm bells to start ringing. Just before he could call Five though, his phone rang.

“Yes, Derek Young here“, he answered, his tone neutral. Upon hearing the report though, his eyes widened underneath his glasses.

“Five found a farm where what happened?!“

——————————————

Normally, Derek was perfectly content with remaining in his office. But a massacre with tentacles…that was something he couldn’t miss out on.

“Thank God, you’re safe“, he let out a sigh of relief once he spotted his boyfriend, walking over towards him. The other Hargreeves siblings seemed to be busy elsewhere.

Five blinked slowly in surprise, then took his hands, squeezing them reassuringly, “Yeah, I’m safe, just like I promised. Derek, what are you doing here?“

He was still planning to talk to forensics, the director and some of his other colleagues, but that could wait. Something told him that Derek hadn’t just come over to check on him. And he ended up being right.

“Walk with me, Mr.Five“, Derek said firmly and lead him to the side of the crime scene, away from the CIA agents, “Listen. You were right. Something is fishy about Sy Grossman. I don’t know yet what. We have to check out his appartment, look for more clues. I have the feeling that this could be something truly big.“

He kept his voice low the entire time. Derek was excited, sure, but he couldn’t let it show just yet.

“And we can’t tell the Director, Five. I think there’s a reason the first background check came back clean. Someone up the ladder doesn’t want us to know about this.“

Five rubbed his eyes hard as he processed the given information. It was certainly quite a lot and he couldn’t help but be a bit proud of his partner. But at the same time, he was worried what would happen if they both ended up going.

“You’re absolutely right“, he whispered back, one hand holding onto Derek’s elbow, “We have to find out more. But I have the feeling the Director won’t allow me to go near this, he wants me to solve this case first. If he’s behind this, I’m probably already on his radar. You’re not. You should go, I’ll keep him distracted.“

Derek shifted, scanning their surroundings once more. It had been a while since he had done…leg work, as some would call it.

“Okay“, he finally sighed heavily, “But how do you plan to distract him?“

A small smirk began to form on Five’s face and he gently turned Derek’s face into the direction where Diego and Luther were standing.

“They will do the distracting for me, I’ll let the director babysit. While they do that, I will investigate this massacre and you will look into Sy Grossman“, he explained, then cursed as he realised his tie was crooked.

Derek laughed quietly and reached forward, meticulously redoing Five’s tie for him. There was genuine affection in his movements.

“Okay, I’ll do that. I’ll give you a call if I find something, please call me back“, he instructed him and readjusted his glasses once he was done.

Five nodded slowly and went to leave. But something deep down didn’t allow him to do so. Maybe his boyfriend had turned him soft, though he wouldn’t mind for once if he did. He took a deep breath, turning back around to face Derek.

“We’ll both return safely, okay? I promise, do you promise that too?“

Instead of answering, Derek leaned forward to kiss him. It didn’t last for long and was by no means deep, just a short touching of their lips. Yet it did the job of fulfilling their ritual for saying goodbye.

“I promise.“

——————————————

It had been a while since Derek had gone out on a mission with gun, badge and everything. He knew the protocoll of course, but it had been a long time nonetheless. Ever since he and Five started working together as partners to be exact. And yet, he couldn’t deny that the adrenaline provided a certain thrill.

Derek pulled up to the house next to Sy Grossman’s appartment, making sure he wasn’t there. No car, no lights on…it was now or never. Entering through the main entrance would be way too obvious, so he settled for entering through the alleyway window, which was thankfully unlocked. Derek grunted a bit as he climbed onto the trashcans, using that as leverage to pull himself through the window. It was by no means an elegant entry, but he would manage.

Upon entering, he noticed that the appartment seemed bare. As if no one had really been living inside of it for weeks. The food inside of the fridge was rotten and the goldfish inside of the large aquarium in Sy’s bedroom floated on the surface belly side up.

“Please don’t let this be a dead end“, Derek mumbled, but he felt as though he already knew the answer for that. No matter how hard he looked, he couldn’t find any documents or condemning evidence. After about an hour of searching, he sighed heavily and jumped out of the window again. This time though, the bins didn’t support his weight and the lid flew off in the process.

“Damn it!“, he cursed just before he hit the ground, hard. Luckily for him, nothing seemed to be broken. Most likely, he would end up with a bruise. Derek groaned as he pushed himself up, dusting off his jacket and making sure his glasses hadn’t gotten damaged.

——————————————

Suddenly, a putrid smell reached his nostrils, along with the sound of flies buzzing. Slowly, he made his way over to the bins, which were now open after the rusty lock had flown off alongside the lid. Instead of apple peels and carton containers for pasta, Derek found rotten flesh.

Human organs, to be exact. Intestines, a heart, a kidney, what looked like a chunk of liver, a pair of lungs…If it hadn’t been for his training, he would have vomited from disgust right then and there. The smell along with the visuals was something that no slasher movie could ever recreate. It was the real deal. Derek went deadly pale, covering his mouth as he took a few steps back, reaching for his phone.

“Come on, Five, please, pick up“, he pleaded with his phone, almost crying out in frustration when the answering machine responded, “Okay, Five, listen. I’m at Sy Grossman’s appartment and I found evidence of a murder. The guy has literal organs in his trash. I’ll take them to forensics, see what they can find out. Please, as soon as you get this message, call me back! This is important.“

Derek would have said more, but the beep signalised that his time was over. With a groan of frustration, he deposited the phone in his pocket and pulled on gloves, along with a plastic bag. He didn’t know that the organs belonged to Sy Grossman, the very man he had been investigating.

“God, this is disgusting…“, he mumbled as he packaged the heart, “What the hell is wrong with-“

——————————————

He cut himself off suddenly. Not only did Derek have the faint feeling that he was being watched, he also heard footsteps and the sound of someone whistling a tune. So after taking a deep breath, he dropped the bag and pulled out his gun.

“Sy Grossman, you’re under arrest and in custody of the CIA for suspected manslaughter! Everything you will say will be used against you, you have the right to remain silent!“

The man in front of him didn’t seem intimidated in the slightest, looking him over from top to bottom like he was inspecting a car he intended to buy. He didn’t say anything at first, he just continued to whistle his tune as he took a step forward.

Derek’s grip on the gun tightened, but he refused to back off now. He was an agent, it was his job to deal with people like this. If Five could do it, so could he.

“I’m warning you! Not one step closer or I’ll shoot!“

Unlike in cop dramas though, he actually did shoot when the man stepped closer. It was by no means fatal, just above the clavicle. But it was enough to stop him in his tracks.

“This could have all been so simple“, the man remarked, seemingly only slightly inconvienced by the pain, “But CIA…you might still be of use.“

——————————————

Before he could shoot again or ask what Sy Grossman meant by that, everything happened very quickly. One second they stood there, the next second Derek felt as though his abdomen went up in flames and he gasped sharply. A barbed tentacle, belonging to the man in front of him, had embedded itself in his lower stomach, though the angle suggested that his upper organs had been hit as well.

The resulting pain was immense. Everything his mind seemed to register was pain, his veins seemed to transport agony, not blood. Derek tried to scream, but the wind had been knocked out of him. While he still attempted to struggle, the red patch on his sweater grew larger and larger. His glasses must have fallen down in the chaos, not that he had noticed. Blood had meanwhile made its way into his lungs and up his throat, coating his tongue.

“Five!“, Derek attempted to call out, but it was useless, “Five…!“

His partner wasn’t there and even if he was, his voice was far too quiet. No one would hear him, except for his killer. His knees had grown too weak to support his weight, buckling underneath Derek like they were made out of paper. And surprisingly, his murdered kneeled down with him, leading him down onto the ground so he could lay down. At that point, the pain had grown duller, his vision darkening with every second that passed.

He knew in that moment that he was going to die, he would never see his dog or Five ever again. Derek attempted to reach into his pocket, a futile attempt to call Five again, but Sy, or rather the thing that pretended to be him, grabbed his wrist, effectively stopping him. A tear slowly made its way down Derek’s cheek, falling down onto the cold concrete. His body was giving up and his mind responded by conjuring up a mental image of Five, smiling at him.

If he concentrated, which was starting to get tough, Derek could feel his lips against his own, their goodbye kiss. Deep down, he felt sorry for breaking his promise. He would not return safely to Five, he would not get to hug him or listen to his stories again. As much as he tried to focus on his good memories, the sting of regret and guilt remained.

At that point, Derek had stopped moving, his green eyes staring up at the cloudy sky. He was holding onto his life by a thread, which seemed enough for his killer though. The feeling of dying was similar to falling asleep, the moments before reminiscent of the short time period before sleep fully enveloped the mind and body. There was a vague sense of what was happening, but no way to know for sure or check.

In Derek’s case, he felt as though the creature, now with woman’s hands, ripped his body open. No pain, only the sensation of getting his insides removed. The last thing he saw before everything went dark were blue eyes, belonging to a woman’s face, looking down at him as cold as an icy morning in November.

——————————————

A few minutes later, Derek’s body stood up again. Effortlessly, as if he used no energy to do so. A sigh escaped his lips and he picked up his glasses, which had only gotten slightly cracked. Slowly, he put his glasses back on, straightening out and cracking his neck, in a manner Derek had done many times before.

“Back to work“, he seemingly tested out his voice, then reached into his pocket, dialing Five’s number again. Derek’s boyfriend was currently stuck in a subway with no reception, so he wouldn’t get the messages until much later.

“Hey Five, it’s me“, Derek’s voice spoke as he made his way back towards his car, “I found the body of Sy Grossman. Somebody seemingly got to him, I don’t know yet who it could be. Meet me at HQ, okay? Love you.“

The beep ended the one sided conversation once more. He sighed softly as he started the car, turning the mirror so he could make eye contact with himself.

“Now…let’s make sure Diego and Luther don’t cause too much damage“, his lips turned upwards into a smirk. After that, he could still deal with Gene and Jean.

One thing after another.

——————————————

I know this was sad, but I still hoped you liked it. For me, the scene in which Derek talks with Luther and reports him to his boss in S4 E5 just felt...off. So this is an explanation of sorts as to why he might be acting like that.

If you liked it, leave some likes or a comment. Every time you do, it really makes my day and fills me with energy to keep going.

Until next time,

-Donna Lawliet

[donnalawliet]

Yet another fic in which Five gets together with Derek, his CIA colleague, instead of Lila. This takes place during Season 4.

Together, Five and Derek investigate Sy Grossman and the Keepers. However, what they find out only caused pain and a tragedy that could have been avoided.

(This starts as fluff, but ends with pure angst, no happy ending here.)

[donnalawliet]

Ok I'm about to say some shit that may or may not make sense. I think it would have been infinitely more heartbreaking if they had gone with a House of M style storyline for season 4 of The Umbrella Academy instead of the bs they did go with.

For those of you who don't know, House of M is a marvel comic storyline. It starts off by showing Wanda Maximoff, one of the most powerful mutants on the planet, having a psychotic break. Her power gives her the ability to warp reality which she used to create her children. She fell so deep into this altered reality that when she learned her children were never actually real, she snapped. She lost control of her ability and killed several of her close friends. Eventually, the most powerful people on the planet have to make a decision whether to kill her or not because she is becoming increasingly difficult to contain. Hearing this, her brother comes and tells her that they're going to kill her. He begs her to rewrite reality, to make a world where all of their friends are happy and they can live in peace. So she does and she gives all of her friends the perfect normal life. For example, Peter Parker has a life where he married Gwen Stacy and his uncle Ben is still alive. Mutants are the higher class of citizen so the X-men are all powerful and loved. Magneto, Wanda's father, is one of the most powerful men in the world. And wolverine is the only person who knows this is wrong. And he, with the help of a little mutant girl who also remembers, gets everyone to remember their old lives so they put the world back. But it's awful, remembering their old lives filled with so much pain. Watching Peter realize that half of his family is actually dead in the real world. That he was finally happy only to have it all ripped away. He was destroyed but then he got fuckin pissed.

Now imagine this with TUA. Allison can't handle Claire and Ray being gone. When she made the deal with Reginald, she had the opportunity to create a new world, to restart and get everything she ever wanted. And in the show, that's what happened, but imagine if she gave all of them what they really wanted. The perfect life.

Luther and Sloane married with a bunch of kids. Sloane is an elementary school teacher, Luther is the school security guard/counselor/gym teacher. Something where he's frequently interacting with the kids. He's always wanted to help people, always felt it was his purpose. He looks out for every kid that passes through those doors, would fight for them and protect them from everyone and everything. He's big and goofy and practically a kid himself too and so all the kids adore him. He has a wonderful life and he feels content.

Diego and Lila are married, they still have their biological kids. But they are also foster parents. Diego knows that anger, that helpless rage of growing up in a house like he did. Lila knows the confusion and pain that comes from losing your family young. Their first foster is Stan and they love him like he's their own. Stan ages out of the system but stays w Diego and Lila, the older brother to their kids. There's never a dull moment, with midnight placements and dozens of after school extracurriculars to attend. Diego has always had an incredibly strong sense of justice. He wanted to be a cop but realized he couldn't be in a dangerous job and be a foster parent. He sees what these kids have been through and he's angry for them, furious even. If he could, he would stab everyone who ever hurt any of his kids, but he can't. He feels helpless and Lila suggests social work. Diego has a normal job, but that itch to be in the action is culled by working with his foster kids, volunteering and helping in areas with high crime, and being a child advocate in courtrooms. Lila loves him all the more for it. Her urge is similar but different. She's still angry, deep down. She loves her kids and her life but she needs a way to get rid of that pain, so she joins a heavy metal band as a drummer. They both have normal boring jobs without any action or thrill, but they're stable and happy. They have both become the people they needed around when they were kids. Their house is full of love and safety and acceptance.

We know Allison's dream life. Her and Ray and Claire. She's happy with them, would do it all again to keep them with her. However, part of her will always be there, in the back of her mind, reminding her that this world is a lie

Klaus and Dave live in a little 2 bedroom apartment together. Klaus is sober, they have an extra room for Ben to stay over whenever he wants. Dave buys cat food for the strays in the alley behind their building and Klaus feeds them every night. They all have names, a group effort between Dave, Klaus, and occasionally Ben. Sometimes Dave goes to the temple for Shabbos services and Klaus almost always tags along. They volunteer at the library and the dog shelter and Klaus picks up art and knitting and writing; anything he can to keep his hands and mind busy. Dave is an army vet turned accountant and Klaus is a barista at a local coffee shop (and a local legend). Klaus has never felt more loved and safe.

Ben is a software engineer at a robotics company. He meets Jennifer, a mechanical engineer, during a company picnic. They hit it off instantly, falling in love quicker than anyone ever imagined. They get engaged after 3 months and married a year after that. No one thinks it will last but they know it will. They have 3 dogs and a cat. They vacation at the beach every year, neither having ever had cause to fear the ocean or what lurks within it.

Viktor lives on a farm with Sissy and Harlan. The quiet, structured life is good for Harlan and Viktor finds himself enjoying it as well. He likes working with his hands, the farm chores and manual labor help him feel fulfilled. Quiet nights by the fireplaces as Viktor teaches Harlan the violin, Sissy sipping her tea as she watches with a smile. They find a school for kids like Harlan nearby and he just flourishes there. He makes friends and gains skills to navigate a scary world and Viktor is so so proud. He gets to watch his son grow up and he couldn't be happier.

Five woke up one day to a life as a professor at a prestigious college where he teaches advanced quantum dynamics and other high level physics courses. His wife, Delores, is a former model and pregnant with their first kid. It's everything he has ever wanted, the life he never dared to fantasize about during the apocalypse. But it's not real. Nothing in this world is real. Five remembers everything. And we, as the viewers, have to watch Five not only turn his back on everything he ever dreamed of having, but he also has to break this dream for his siblings too. He has to tell them that their lives aren't real, their spouses and kids and homes aren't real and they never were. Can you imagine the devastation? That would have been infinitely harder to watch than them just laying down to die imo. And also would give everyone that glimpse of a happy ending only to have it ripped away from them. A chance to bring back all the threads and loose ends that were left in different seasons.

If you've read this far, thanks for coming to my tedtalk lol

[donnalawliet]

Coffee or Tea? (addition to my previous Derek x Five oneshot)

Well, you all enjoyed that first chapter https://www.tumblr.com/donnalawliet/759443098831110144/coffee-or-tea-five-x-derek-oneshot so much, so here's a second chapter! Thank you for all the kind words, comments and likes, it really encouraged me to keep writing. I did my best to include some of your suggestions.

In this second chapter, Derek meets Five's family.

———————————

Slowly, unable to believe his own eyes, Five began to take in his surroundings. Where tall buildings had once stood…only remained ruins. Melted and bent metal littered the broken streets, burning trees barely resembled trees anymore. So much was burning, yet there was no noise.

That was the worst thing. There were no screams of panic, no sirens, no sounds of attempts to extinguish the fire that was trying to swallow the city. Instead, there was silence.

Five broke that silence as he began to cough, the falling ash invading his lungs and taking root somewhere deep inside. Panic overwhelmed his mind to the point that normal thoughts were pushed out and he started running, in the hope that he would reach a safer place. Instead, it only got worse.

“No…“, he whispered breathlessly as he spotted the ruins of the Umbrella Academy, burning like the rest of the city. There they were. His siblings, all of them unmoving and pale. He was back in the apocalypse, in the hell that he had landed himself in. Yet when he tried to teleport, not even one blue spark came up.

With all of his options exhausted, Five started to cry and scream. In the back of his mind he thought that he could hear something, but he was too busy giving his frustrations and fears a voice. Until he was suddenly pulled back.

———————————

“Five!“, Derek exclaimed as he shook his shoulder to wake him up. He had at first tried to only use his voice, but that hadn’t worked. In one moment, they had both been sleeping peacefully in seperate beds, because Five still wasn’t comfortable with so much touching, because their mattress preferences were different and because Five was a blanket hoarder. Then all of the sudden, his partner had screamed as if someone was attempting to rip his heart out.

Rather abruptly, Five’s eyes opened again and he sat up, gasping for air. His eyes were wide with panic, pupils dilated to the point that the green was barely visible and his heart was beating so quickly with adrenaline that it resembled the wings of a hummingbird. For a few moments, it seemed like he didn’t even know where he was. Then suddenly, his expression softened.

“Derek?“, he whispered and Five couldn’t help but sound like a small child, scared of the lightening outside. If he was there, that meant the apocalypse wasn’t.

Derek nodded in response, shifting slightly. He was practically kneeling on the bed next to Five, one leg on the mattress and one on the floor.

“Yeah, I’m here. It was just a dream, I-hmpf!“, he was cut off by Five practically falling into his chest, like a marionette with its strings cut. In that moment, Derek knew that asking questions would result in nothing. Five was obviously exhausted. And even though it was quite unusual for him to want to cuddle, he didn’t stop him.

Only after a few seconds did Derek realise that Five was falling asleep listening to his heartbeat. To make sure he was still alive and would stay that way.

“Goodnight, Mr.Five“, Derek whispered before he closed his eyes again, despite the awkward position he found himself in.

———————————

The next morning, Derek woke up alone. That wasn’t unusual by any means, sometimes Five headed off to work early to get some preparations done. And after that eventful night, talking about feelings was out of the question. They never talked about nightmares or trauma, Five argued that they had their respective therapists for that.

During his morning routine however, he could detect the faint scent of coffee and tea wafting through the appartment. A sign that Five hadn’t left, but had simply gotten up early to prepare breakfast. The thought of that alone was enough to make Derek smile. Instead of taking his time with styling his hair and picking out his outfit, he decided to walk into the kitchen, tying his tie in the process.

“Morning“, Five yawned without looking up from his coffee. He wasn’t really in the mood for talking in the morning, at least not until he had reached his ideal caffeine levels. Which he still hadn’t reached by a long shot.

“Good morning, Mr.Five“, Derek replied with a soft smile and began to look through their mail. The entire atmosphere was deeply comforting. It was lazy, natural and painfully domestic. And it gave his partner a sense of retirement, something that he deeply desired, but could never quite reach.

Five cleared his throat when Derek picked up a letter with really chaotic handwriting. The older man recognised it, but not many other people would.

“It’s an invitation from my idiot brother“, he explained, though there was no real malice, “He wants to have a family dinner or something. With all the kids and partners…it’s stupid.“

His words were a deflection, nothing more. Five couldn’t imagine that his siblings, who he had spent years protecting, really wanted him there. He was just another name on the list, the one everyone hoped wouldn’t show up. At least that was what he told himself. Sometimes his old mind couldn’t comprehend the thought of his family caring about him, not the same way he did.

Derek hummed quietly as he read the words, then looked up at Five. And there it was again, that calm smile of his.

“I think we should go. I would love to meet your family.“

For a few seconds, Five stared at him as if he had just suggested that they should do the hula. It was the same look he had given Luther whenever he had mentioned the moon in relation to the apocalypse…before it had actually caused the apocalypse.

“My family consists of a bunch of lunatics. They’re not…like you. Trust me, you don’t want to deal with all of their collective issues“, Five snorted and took another sip from his coffee. In truth, he was scared of Derek wanting to leave.

Because if he did, he would be alone…again. Five‘s breath hitched slightly when their hands made contact, but he didn’t pull away.

Derek smiled at him, reassuringly, despite the way his heart pounded with excitement. And for just a few moments, they were alone. There was no CIA, no Reginald Hargreeves, no annoying siblings. Just them, peaceful and happy.

“You spend so much time making sure these…lunatics…are safe. It makes me a bit curious of what they’re actually like. Unless you don’t want me there“, he explained, though a hint of fear was present as he uttered the last sentence.

Almost immediately, Five shook his head, which indirectly sealed their fate. But he didn’t care, in the worst case scenario they would just leave shortly after arriving.

“Of course I want you there. Now, could you get me another coffee? I can’t deal with this without caffeine or I will kill someone.“

Derek actually laughed and stood up. This was as close as he would get to Five declaring his love for him and he would take it. His older partner wasn’t really the traditional romantic, but he was fine with that. He wasn’t one either.

“I think the murder look in your eyes does something for me“, Derek teased him lightly while Five finished up his cup. That little attempt at flirting was enough for Five to almost choke on his coffee, all while trying to control the colour of his face.

In a matter of seconds, it turned a flattering shade of burgundy. Five rarely blushed, but whenever he did, Derek was the cause for it.

“Shut up“, he mumbled, though he clearly couldn’t hold back a shy smile.

———————————

A few days later, they made their way to the announced family dinner. Though it was far less formal than what most people would have in mind. The Hargreeves siblings were not the best at picking one specific meal, so takeout dining was the way to go. Which basically meant that the dining room table held everything from pizza to pasta to fried rice. It wasn’t the most aesthetically pleasing dinner, but it did the job and Diego’s kids loved it.

However, that wasn’t the thing that everyone focused on that night.

“Wait…did Five not come alone?“, Luther asked Diego while both of their wives were busy sitting on the couch. They were in charge of plating, with Luther having insisted on it so Sloane could relax. And Lila had then basically pressured Diego into being a gentleman, so he did the same.

Diego slowly shook his head as he watched Five and Derek take each other’s coats off, in complete disbelief.

Klaus was the one that ended up greeting them though.

“Good evening Fivey“, he grinned widely and looked his older brother over, “Mein Bruder, you really look amazing. Love the longer hair.“

Instead of telling Klaus to get lost or shut up, Five brushed his hair behind his ears and straightened up.

“Thank you. Still not sure how I feel about it yet. I prefer you with your shorter hair“ he commented while Derek was busy with redoing his tie, then turned towards him once he was done, “Come on, let’s get some mulled wine.“

Klaus stared at them, speechless until he ran over towards Diego like an excited child. Already, there was something extraordinary for the Hargreeves siblings to focus on and they attacked it like starving wolves.

“Did you see that? Five took a compliment from me and didn’t tell me off!“, he whisper yelled so the aforementioned brother wouldn’t hear.

Diego nodded slowly, not taking his eye off the couple as they sat down on the couch next to Sloane and Lila. It was very strange for Five to be so civil during a family outing.

“Do you think his buddy is another secret serial killer or something? It would explain why he and Five get along so well“, Diego began to theorise, “Or he’s from the Commission. He has shady office guy written all over him.“

In truth, he didn’t think that Derek looked particularly threatening. He seemed like a perfectly nice person that he would pass by in the grocery store without thinking twice. But that didn’t mean anything.

Viktor took that moment to walk into the kitchen, one glass of wine in his hand. He had previously watched the scene from the stairs, but now he was curious.

“Guys, is Five okay? He just laughed at one of Ray’s jokes, even though they’re absolutely terrible.“

They had seen their brother smile before, but this amount was definitely a cause for concern in their books.

———————————

Five was feeling quite comfortable, both due to Derek and the mulled wine by his side. So much so that he actually laughed when Lila commented on his pasty knees that he had shown in the past.

“Those shorts were a crime against humanity more severe than the apocalypse“, Five commented and crossed his legs. He and Derek weren’t holding hands, as that would make him quite uncomfortable, but they were close enough for their shoulder’s to touch.

———————————

Meanwhile, Five’s siblings were still stuck trying to figure the situation out.

“Well, he seems happy, so why don’t we just leave it?“, Viktor asked eventually while helping Luther with the cutlery arrangement.

Diego rubbed his eyes hard. While he appreciated Five not insulting any of them, he was also concerned for him. And maybe part of him was naturally suspicious. Everything in this family was weird and unusual, but never like this.

“The guy seems nice, polite and like a really good friend to Five“, Diego told them quietly and grabbed the nearby Dora the Explorer napkins, “But what if he’s like Leonard? We can’t have that happen again.“

The Leonard and later the Lila incident had been enough to make the entire family wary of new additions. Especially ones that seemed too friendly at first sight. And after some of them had seen how soft Five could be, they wanted him to be truly happy.

———————————

Derek sipped his mulled wine while he and Five listened to Sloane talk about her Italy honeymoon with Luther. He was surprised by how relatively normal the conversations seemed to be.

Sure, Lila was by no means completely normal, but she seemed more occupied with complimenting her daughter’s drawings than with the adult conversations.

“I loved our trip to the mausoleum“, Sloane ranted excitedly, “It was just everything I ever wanted and more. Luther liked the fountain in front of it, we made a wish there every single day.“

“Truly happy for you, Sloane“, Derek smiled, his tone showing that he meant it, “My job makes travelling a bit difficult, but it sounds exciting.“

He looked up when the rest of the family sat down. So far he had only talked to Klaus and the in-laws, but now he would be confronted with the rest of Five’s actual family. Soon enough, he would realise why Five had warned him.

“What do you do for work then, Mister…?“, Diego asked, clearly wanting his name. The way he asked was by no means polite, which visibly annoyed Five. It was a bit reminiscent of a cop in a noir movie leading an interrogation and not in the nice way.

“His name is Derek and he works with me, Diego.“

Five’s tone seemed a bit sharp, he was slightly drunk and wanted to have a good time, without anyone interrupting it. However, his siblings seemed focused on doing exactly that. He didn’t seem to realise that they were doing what he had been doing all those years, just on a much smaller scale. Making sure he was safe and doing well.

“Five, it’s okay. It’s a valid question“, Derek carefully reassured him. He was slowly starting to understand what exactly his partner meant. Five’s siblings were by no means normal. Though he hadn’t grasped the full extent of it just yet.

“Me and Five share a desk. I do a lot  of the paper work, he does a lot of field work, though we do switch sometimes“, he began to explain in an effort to lighten up the mood, “Does that answer your question, Diego?“

Diego hummed, seemingly satisfied for a moment before he frowned.

“Wait…you know my name. Five, what did you tell him about all of us?!“, he sounded a bit panicked when he said that. A good informed potential enemy was a dangerous one, Reginald Hargreeves had always said that.

———————————

While Derek was starting to look a bit uncomfortable with the interrogation, shifting back and forth, his partner was mainly annoyed. Five had wanted a relatively normal evening, nothing more.

But of course, he couldn’t have that. In moments like these, he honestly wondered why he went through all the trouble of protecting his family.

“He had every right of knowing everything that I told him. Derek is more capable than most of you combined, Diego, hence why I live with him, not with you“, Five replied rather sharply, one hand planted firmly on the table. He barely noticed that he had taken a protective stance, ready to defend Derek from his own brother.

———————————

Klaus was the first one to break the silence that came afterwards. He had been looking Derek over, starting at his goofy glasses and ending at the way he did his tie. And even though his siblings often ignored him, he wasn’t stupid. He could see the way that Derek and Five looked at each other, the small invisible gestures that barely registered.

Klaus recognised it, he had once been the same way with Dave when they had started dating. And even though they were past that honeymoon phase now, he still found himself falling into those same patterns when he was around his love. It was a shame that Dave had to stay at home with the cat. A wide grin began to form on his face, one that Five recognised and was a bit afraid of.

“Are you two an item?“, he asked and his grin widened even more, to the point that Klaus resembled the cat from Alice in Wonderland.

“What are you, from the 1940s?!“, Five shot right back, but it didn’t have the desired effect. Instead of making everyone ignore Klaus, everyone stared at them. Inlcuding Allison and Claire, who had just come back from soccer practice. Viktor’s expression softened a bit.

“Five, it’s okay if you are“, Viktor sounded a bit awkward, but he kept pushing forward, “I’m glad that you’re happy.“

For a few seconds, Five was speechless. He was a bit frustrated because of his siblings and that was putting it mildly. But at the same time, he felt relieved by the fact that they knew now. Part of him had been scared that either Derek or his siblings would leave. However, that didn’t seem to be happening. His partner was still sitting next to him and his siblings seemed surprised, but not disgusted. To be expected when they had  a sibling like Klaus. Five coming out of the closet when he was an old man didn’t seem as shocking in comparison.

Derek smiled a bit at the kind words, daring to touch Five’s knee as his partner answered the question with a nod. While he was definitely overwhelmed by the situation, he didn’t feel as though he needed to be afraid.

———————————

Diego cleared his throat a bit. He didn’t seem as aggressive as before, but still a bit worried. So he gestured towards Luther to ask the question that they had formulated together in the kitchen.

Luther frowned, then blushed darkly as he realised how dumb it would sound out loud.

“We just need to make sure…Do you promise that you’re not a sick serial killer or Commission employee sent to assassinate one of us?“

For a few moments, the question hung out in the open like an awkward marriage proposal. Derek glanced at Five, as if to confirm that it was not a joke, then looked at Luther.

“I…I promise.“

He was utterly dumbfounded, unable to form a sarcastic remark this time. So Derek just went for the blunt truth. Five had told him about the Commission once, but hadn’t gone into much detail. And he most definitely didn’t work for them.

“Good“, Lila smirked and stood up, her sleeping eldest daughter in her arms, “Because I’m starving and I really wasn’t in the mood for murder. I’ll just get this little munchkin to bed so we can eat.“

———————————

The rest of the evening went off without any major problems. Slowly but surely, Five was starting to relax again. Because despite his family’s rather chaotic behaviour, Derek seemed to be enjoying himself. He engaged in their conversations, answered questions and overall was just having a good time.

“Did you two meet at work?“, Allison asked curiously while she reached for the fortune cookies. She was half leaning against her husband, who was holding her free hand.

“Yeah, my boss assigned me to him on his first day“, Derek leaned back, not really in the mood for more food, “I started just about a year prior. My former colleague ended up retiring.“

His partner shifted a bit and went to say more, but their conversation was interrupted by one of the twins crying. And naturally, when one began to cry, the other wasn’t far behind. Lila groaned quietly, having just relaxed against Diego’s shoulder. Her husband seemed equally tired and exhausted, because otherwise he wouldn’t have said the following: “Five, could you maybe get that? You’re the only one that Coco tolerates.“

Five blinked slowly, looking at his brother, then at Derek. To his surprise, Derek stood up with him, a small smile on his cheek. He liked children, despite not having any of his own. And even though he and Five had never talked about the possibility of adopting them one day, he certainly didn’t mind looking after Five’s nieces and nephews.

“Okay, I’ll look after your stupid kid“, Five mumbled, but his tone held no real malice. His siblings seemed to notice that as well, because Viktor and Allison looked at him in genuine surprise, while Lila grinned and pinched his cheek.

“Thank you, mate“, she smiled, her accent getting a bit thicker.

———————————

Derek chuckled quietly, which earned him a playful glare from Five as he pulled him along by his sleeve. By checking on Diego’s kids, they would also have the opportunity to talk amongst themselves for the first time in hours.

“I told you they were morons“, Five mumbled under his breath as he rubbed his eyes hard, though he couldn’t hold back a small laugh. He had been so worried that this dinner would ruin everything, so he was overwhelmed with relief.

“They’re…definitely chaotic“, Derek readjusted his glasses slightly before opening the door, “But I don’t mind it. They’re your family. And we’re with the CIA, we’ve had much worse, Mr.Five.“

Five nodded slowly before he decided to focus on the task at hand. It was what he did best after all, his entire job consisted of focussing on small jobs like his life depended on it. Though this time, no one would die if he messed up. Except for his ears maybe.

“Hey Coco, hey Stanley“, he whispered and his voice turned quite soft. Derek had rarely heard Five talk in such a caring way, it took him a bit by surprise.

“Could you tell me what’s going on? I’m your uncle, I’m here to help“, Five reassured the twins as they looked up at him with wide eyes. They looked like they were on the brink of crying again. Instead of a verbal answer, both of them extended their arms towards him. The universal sign of Pick me up.

By no means was Five a toddler expert. But even an idiot would understand what they would have to do next, it wasn‘t exactly complicated. Back when he had met his nieces and nephew for the first time, he had been a bit of a mess. At least he knew the basics now.

Five sighed heavily, realising that he had a problem.

“I can’t carry you both“, he said quietly, then looked over at Derek, “You take Stan, I’m taking Coco, okay?“

Derek nodded immediately. He recognised the tone, it was the same one Five used when they were talking about the execution of a mission plan. And that didn’t leave much time for debate. So in less than a minute, they sat next to each other on the couch, holding one toddler each in their arms. Just like that, the crying stopped. Five let out a deep sigh of relief while one hand rubbed over his niece’s back.

“Sorry for dragging you into this mess“, Five told him in a hushed tone, though he was smiling a bit, “You don’t seem to mind though, do you?“

In the dimmed light of the room, he could see the way Derek held the toddler like he was the most precious thing he had ever come across. That question almost caused him to laugh out loud, but he caught himself.

“No, I don’t mind“, Derek carefully brushed Stan’s hair into place while leaning back to get comfortable, “But I think we’re going to be here for quite a while.“

In a situation like this, standing up became practically impossible. All that was left to do was to accept their fate. A few minutes into silence, Five carefully extended his free hand until he found Derek’s next to him. The three magic words remained unspoken, but Derek heard them nonetheless. He could hear them in the way Five looked at him, in the way their fingers brushed against each other, in the way they made each other coffee or tea.

In their own way, they loved each other.

———————————

If you liked it, leave a like or a comment. It really makes my day and encourages me to keep going. Also, I would have an idea for another smaller additional chapter, set during Season 4. It could also have some angst if that‘s what you want. Would you be interested in that?

If you are, let me know!

Until next time,

-Donna Lawliet

[donnalawliet]

And here, due to popular command, is the second chapter to the original oneshot!

If you‘re interested in another chapter, just let me know. For now, I hope you enjoy Derek meeting Five‘s family.

Here‘s a small oneshot that I wrote to deal with the mess that was Season 4 of the Umbrella Academy.

I really didn't like the way they handled Five's "love story" in Season 4. And even though he would have been fine without a romance too, here's my version of a Five experiencing love with a human. Not with Lila, but with Derek, Five's CIA colleague. This is set post S3 and pre S4.

After being stuck in a reset universe without powers or siblings, Five joins the CIA to keep an eye on his family. There, he meets Derek and is suddenly confronted with all kinds of things he hadn't faced in years. Some of them seem uncomfortable at first, but he learns to warm up.

[donnalawliet]

Coffee or Tea? (Five x Derek oneshot)

I really didn't like the way they handled Five's "love story" in Season 4. And even though he would have been fine without a romance too, here's my version of a Five experiencing love with a human. Not with Lila, but with Derek, Five's CIA colleague. This is set post S3 and pre S4. This is my personal addition to the Season 4 fix it movement. And even though it's set prior to that last season, I still think it counts.

I mentioned under a post that I would rather ship Five x Derek than Five x Lila. So...Here I am, doing exactly that.

Thank you @tuttle-did-it , @ashes-and-starlight and @xx-blood-lemons-xx for the initial inspiration! I hope you like it, especially you, @ashes-and-starlight . (I‘ll enjoy your Five diner fanfic when it comes out 😊)

I also wanted to thank @lookingforhappy for the post explaining why Five being a member of the CIA didn‘t make much sense. I attempted to explain some plotholes that you mentioned 😅

One last thanks goes to @i-am-tardis-locked for listening to me rambling all day, like always.

Anyway, let‘s get going!

—————————————

Summary: After being stuck in a reset universe without powers or siblings, Five joins the CIA to keep an eye on his family. There, he meets Derek and is suddenly confronted with all kinds of things he hadn't faced in years. Some of them seem uncomfortable at first, but he learns to warm up.

——————————————

Stranded in a new timeline, without his siblings or powers, Five was forced to adapt. Luckily, he was used to doing that. His father had once complimented his ability to adapt and Sir Reginald Hargreeves wasn’t exactly known for dolling out compliments for everyone and everything. In the four decades he had spent in the apocalypse, adapting to his enviroment was equal to survival. That included no longer feeling guilty for raiding corpses or no longer being picky when it came to food. The apocalypse was by no means a five star restaurant. When he transferred to the Commission, he had to adapt once more. New manners, new job, new people.

But through all of this adapting, one goal had stayed consistent. To save his family from the impending apocalypse, to go back for them. Once he left the courtyard without his siblings though, still coming to terms with the fact that he had his arm back…his goal had to adapt as well. This was no longer about actively saving his family. It was about keeping them safe. They came above everything else, not him.

Reginald had taught them a few things that back then, none of the Umbrella Academy members thought would be useful.That included obtaining legal documents, without the legal part. In the Commission, Five had sometimes watched the legal department, how they fabricated fake IDs, court orders or other documents with ease.

And even though he was nowhere near that level, he was good enough. It took him about a week to create an ID, a birth certificate and a high school diploma. All of it was a lot of work. He sometimes had to break into buildings to add himself to their records, but he didn’t care. It would be worth it in the long run.

————————————

Attending college was relatively easy in comparison, bordering on boring. Five’s father had prepared them quite well for that level of learning and in the apocalypse, he had become an expert on math and quantum physics. So a lot of the lectures ended up just being a formality.

Instead of writing things down, Five occupied himself with looking up his family. Allison was in LA with her husband, daughter and Klaus. Luther had found a new place of employment, along with Diego, who had welcomed his first daughter with Lila. Five quickly wiped at his eyes as soon as he read the announcement in the online newspaper. As much as he wished to be an uncle, he couldn’t. Not just yet.

Five finished college in record time. He didn’t attend the ceremony, even though a part of him wanted to. Only the weak need praise to carry on, he remembered his father’s words. And he didn’t have time to be weak. He had a job to do.

————————————

Protecting his siblings required sacrifices and overcoming personal challenges. That was something Five had realised a long time ago. But when he sent his application to the CIA, that realisation hit him like a ton of bricks once more. he roughly knew what a job like that was like. It required absolute loyalty, going undercover, a physical and psychological examination. All of it reminded him of the Commission. He would have an employer again, be stuck in an office instead of enjoying retirement.

Upon receiving his acceptance letter and the request to move to Washington DC for his training, Five slowly walked into his bathroom to look in the mirror. His fake birth certificate stated that he was 18, but in truth his body had just turned 16. Upon looking at his reflection though, he didn’t see himself. He saw an old man, traumatised by years of isolation and lack of things like food or personal hygiene.

“It’s going to be okay“, he whispered to himself, though it didn’t sound very convincing, “As long as they’re alright…it will be worth it.“

————————————

Throughout his training, Five felt an odd sense of numbness. He expected to feel disgusted by how much it reminded him of his training at the Academy or Commission. But there was nothing of the sort. No sense of anger towards the profiler during his psych eval, which he passed with flying colours. He knew what answers he had to give in order to be left alone. Five remembered how much the Commission profiler had bothered him, how he had hated getting his deepest insides get revealed in astonishing detail, until he had learned how to adapt.

But he felt nothing. Neither the obstacle course, examinations by a doctor or profiler really bothered him. He just went through the daily routine, like a zombie with just one goal. There was no anxiety when his test results arrived nor joy when the other cadets celebrated upon passing them. In what felt like a blink of an eye, his training was over and he was assigned jobs. And that was when he met Derek.

————————————

When Director Ribbons had announced that he wouldn’t be working alone, Five had been hesitant at first. Even back in the Commission, he had always insisted on working alone. No partner to bother him or distract him from his plans. But while the Handler had accepted this violation of protocoll, the Director didn’t.

“You’re a new and promising agent“, Ribbons had told him, without offering Five a seat to sit down in, “And despite your maturity, a partner will do you good, I’m sure of it. On undercover missions, you may go on your own, but I don’t see a reason for it in the office.“

Five bit his lip and shifted slightly. He liked being able to wear a suit again instead of the uniform that showed his knees to everyone. In a suit, people were forced to take him more seriously in some way.

“Sir, while I understand what you mean“, he hated having to take on a polite tone like that, “I really do work better alone. I’ll produce good results.“

Five wasn’t a fan of the whole respect game. But in order to stay employed, he unfortunately had to treat his boss with some level of respect, despite being much older.

Ribbons looked him over for a moment. Sometimes, Five had the feeling that his boss saw more than just an agent, but he couldn’t quite place it. Despite his request, he shook his head.

“You’ll be working with a partner. Go to your desk, he’s already waiting for you.“

Five had no other choice but to obey that order. If he protested more, it could result in another psych eval or unnecessary questions. So he simply nodded and made his way towards his desk, pushing the intrusive thoughts on how to quickly kill his boss out of his head. Ever since he had started to work at the Commission a few years ago, these thoughts refused to go away.

————————————

As soon as he entered his room, a young man stood up from his chair. If Five had to guess, he was only a few years older than himself, dressed in a dark green blazer, with a tie and light blue shirt underneath it. More casual than Five’s three piece suit, but still professional. His blonde hairstyle reminded Five a bit of the 1950s, but the glasses and soft facial features broke that illusion. Only a few seconds after entering did Five notice that he had been staring. His mind was really all over the place.

“I’m Derek Young“, his visitor eventually said after no introduction from Five came, “I’m your new partner, pleasure to meet you.“

He held out his hand to shake, a soft smile illuminating his features. Only then did Five regain his senses and shook his hand, making eye contact for the first time. He still wasn’t completely comfortable with touch, the sensation sometimes proved too much.

“Five, Hargreeves“, he replied, keeping it short and with no explanation on why he shared his last name with one of the most well known people in the world. Derek didn’t seem bothered by that cold introduction though, still smiling.

“Our boss told me quite a lot about you, Mr.Hargreeves“, Derek remarked while sorting through one of the files on the desk.

Five froze for a few moments. Not because of the first part of the sentence, he had heard that one many times. But never in his whole life had he been called Mr.Hargreeves by anyone. His siblings had called him Five, his father Number Five, the Handler and everyone at the Commission either those or Mr.Five on the rare occasion. But never Mr.Hargreeves. It didn’t feel like him, even though he was surely old enough to be called that. Still…it didn’t feel right.

“Please don’t call me that, Mr.Derek“, he told him, trying to keep his voice firm, but only being half successful. Five scolded himself for how weak he sounded. Why did a simple name break his mind?

Derek frowned for a moment, then shrugged like it was nothing.

“Very well. Is Mr.Five alright with you?“, he asked, almost carefully that time, as if testing out the waters, “Since you call me Mr.Derek.“

He had expected to not like that way of adressing him either. The Handler had called him that after all. And every time he thought of her, his stomach flipped upside down in not a good way. But surprisingly, Five felt oddly fine with it. Derek’s voice and body language was nothing like his former employer, there was no need to be alarmed in any way. He didn’t have to look up at him like he had always had to do with her and everyone else, they were roughly the same height. Five pulled himself out of his thoughts and shrugged.

“Sure, why the hell not. Do you know where in the building I can find a decent cup of coffee?“

The rush of caffeine always helped Five with distracting himself. No falling asleep, no nightmares, just work.

————————————

At first, Five had assumed that Derek would annoy him. He was much younger after all, there were still things like hope and life left in his eyes. His partner went to work with the genuine intention of helping others. He got Five coffee every morning, while he himself stuck with tea. And even though Five could never understand how one could prefer hot leaf juice over some roasted black coffee, he had to admit that Derek brought him some good coffee.

“Which machine do you go to?“, he asked one morning after taking his first sip, “No matter which part of the building I go to, all coffee tastes like absolute crap.“

Five wasn’t one for making small talk, so Derek was a bit caught off guard by the genuine curiosity. A light blush began to settle down on his cheeks and he cleared his throat a bit.

“I…I bring the coffee blend with me. I can give you the adress of the shop I go to, if that’s what you want, Mr.Five. It’s no big deal, I just thought you might enjoy it more. I can’t stand the tea they give out here either“, he replied and hid part of his face with his teacup.

For the first time in what felt like years, Five’s lip tugged upwards. It took him a moment to realise that he was smiling in  a genuine way, like an idiot. But he couldn’t bring himself to stop, a comforting warmth building up in his chest. He could barely remember the last time someone had genuinely cared about him in such a small way. Derek didn’t even like coffee, yet he brought a good blend of it to work, just so Five would feel a bit happier. The warmth in his chest moved upwards, settling in his cheeks in a similar way to Derek. He was blushing like a hormonal teenager, which he both was and wasn’t.

“Oh, I…Thank you“, he eventually managed to mumble, “That’s very kind of you. I’ll just…Go talk to our boss, he wanted something.“

Five quickly made his way out of the room, taking a few deep breaths as he leaned against the nearest wall. Ribbons didn’t even want anything, but he had needed an excuse to gather his bearings.

“Shit…get yourself together“, he whispered to himself, the taste of coffee still present on his tongue. And like every time he felt upset or overwhelmed, the last words of his former wife, Dolores, echoed through his mind: I want you to enjoy your life, Five. We had good years together, but it’s time that you learn to live without me. You fought so hard for your family, it’s time that you enjoy the results.

Five reached up as a single tear traced down his cheek, quickly wiping it away. He was a grown man, why was he so overwhelmed by this? He decided to avoid Derek for the rest of the day, he needed time to think.

————————————

A few weeks later, Five learned that if he wanted to, Derek could be just as sarcastic as he was. Ever since he had started working there, Susan had been a figurative pain in everyone‘s ass. But because she was a senior agent with a long history, almost no one dared say anything about it. One day, while waiting for their turn on the copier, she began to rant about all kinds of problems plaguing her. Five had to seriously focus on not snapping her neck, so he kept his mouth shut.

“Anyway, my son just introduced me to his boyfriend. Boyfriend?! He’s a man, how can he be attracted to another man? That’s not how it works!“, Susan exclaimed and looked at them, expecting nods or general confirming words.

Derek crossed his arms in front of his chest and looked her up and down. Five knew that look. He had given it to several idiots before.

“So you’re saying one should rather fall in love with a body than with a soul? That’s really shallow and sad“, he said and gave her a fake look of pity before grabbing the files from the desk next to the copier. While Susan still scrambled for words, Five turned towards Derek with surprise.

“Did you…Did you just…?“, he asked, lost for words for once. In response, Derek simply shrugged, a confident smile on his face.

“Somebody had to tell her, she was annoying me. Why, do you have a problem with that, Mr.Five?“

That last sentence had a certain edge to it, as if Derek was either scared or prepared that Five would say yes. However, Five shook his head almost immediately. He had been more surprised than anything else.

“No, not at all. Maybe she’ll keep her damn mouth shut for a few hours“, Five quickly deflected, still processing what had just happened. After that short conversation, they just continued with their day as if nothing had happened.

————————————

Later that evening, while reviewing his family’s files, Five’s thoughts began to wander once more. During the apocalypse, he had never really thought about his sexuality. He had Dolores, but she barely counted as a woman. He had never really felt the desire to have sex, he had more desired to just see a familiar face. Any human face, if he was being honest with himself. And the tough survival conditions didn’t leave much room to think about what he was attracted to. When he closed his eyes, he realised that he could see himself with a woman by his side just as easily as with a man.

And even though he knew how sex worked, the thought of himself having sex with anyone whatsoever left him disgusted. He vaguely remembered telling Klaus in 2019: What a disturbing glance into this thing you call a brain, when he had mentioned the topic.

Before his thoughts could go off the rails even more, Five pulled himself back to the present. He had to make sure his siblings were safe, that was why he had taken the job in the first place.

————————————

After a rather frustrating case that had taken weeks and almost made him bang his head against a wall, Five was exhausted, so was Derek.

“Would you like to catch some drinks later?“, Derek asked him as they both gathered their coats. It sounded so casual, in a way that Five could never do himself. In the last few years, Five had attempted to lower his alcohol intake, but he hadn’t completely succeeded in stopping completely.

“Oh, sure, but…I’m not a big fan of bars“, Five responded, sounding almost ashamed. He had gone to bars before, but had never been completely comfortable there. It had almost always been for work. He half expected Derek to decline as a result, mentally cursing himself for being so uptight. But surprisingly, that didn’t happen.

“That’s fine. We can go to my place, if you’d like. I don’t mind it, Mr.Five“, he said with a wink. That name had almost become a form of teasing that they used with each other. Five smirked a bit and put on his coat, a way of protecting himself from the cold November air.

“Lead the way, Mr.Derek.“

People had different types of reactions when they got drunk. Some got more angry and violent, others sad and melancholic, others happy and joyful. Five got more honest after a few drinks, dropping his walls a bit more. And after a few homemade martinis, he found himself relaxing a bit more.

“You’re quite nice“, he mumbled and took another sip from his glass, “Nicer than my family by a long shot. Why? What do you have to gain?“

Derek frowned and sat down on the couch next to him. His drinks had far less alcohol, so he was just feeling a bit tipsy.

“I’m not nice to you because I have something to gain, Five. Why would you think something like that?“ His voice got a bit softer, as if he felt that there was more behind that drunk question.

Five laughed in response, but it held no humor whatsoever. He was overwhelmed by all kinds of different feelings and thoughts.

“Because I’m a rude old man? Because I’ve never done anything to warrant friendliness from someone like you? You’re young, you could just ask for a transfer with someone who is…more like you.“ Five couldn’t care less that he had just hinted at his true age. If Derek left, it would just confirm his world view.

Derek blinked slowly as he listened to Five ramble. He couldn’t completely make sense of what he was saying, but asking would feel quite rude. So after a few seconds of silence, he set his glass down.

“You may come off as rude, yeah, but…That’s not who you are. Remember how you almost ripped Stacy’s head off because she called me a twink? You didn’t even know what it meant at the time“, Derek chuckled a bit and managed to get Five to smile as well, “I don’t care how old you are or how grumpy you can get without coffee. You deserve to be treated well.“

Five stared at him for what felt like hours, but was probably just a few seconds. He wasn’t even sure what his expression his face was making, he could be crying for all he knew. The last time he had felt close to that safe had been with Dolores in an underground bunker they had found.

He didn’t remember what came after, the alcohol sending his memory to nirvana. The next thing that Five knew, he woke up on a dark green couch underneath a knitted blanket. His head was pounding as if he was Zeus giving birth to Athena and the thirst was overwhelming. At the same time, the thought of moving was enough to make him groan.

“Shit…“, Five mumbled and lazily covered his eyes to avoid the sunlight. With it being November, that meant it must be quite late.

“Here you go“, he suddenly heard Derek’s soft voice right next to him. Slowly, Five moved his arm off his face and blinked up at him. The room was a bit darker now, thanks to the curtains. Derek was standing behind the couch so Five didn’t have to move his head too much, wearing his blue shirt without the tie or blazer. His hair wasn’t styled as neatly, it just looked fluffy and soft. But before Five could think about his hair further, his attention was drawn to what Derek was holding. A glass of water and a pill bottle, most likely aspirin.

“You’re my salvation“, Five mumbled and took both. The act of sitting up alone made him groan, but the feeling of cold water sliding down his throat made up for it. “What happened last night? After that…conversation we had.“

Derek cleared his throat a bit and sat down next to him on the couch, his expression unreadable.

“You had two more drinks, talked about your age, your ex wife, your siblings…then you threw up in my potted plant and passed out on my couch“, he explained and brushed his hair a bit more into place, “That’s it, I think.“

Five groaned and leaned back into the pillow that Derek had provided him with. He felt like he had ruined everything. The first casual relationship he had ever managed to build up with a human being that wasn’t his family or someone he had been tasked with assassinating…and he had destroyed it with alcohol.

“Shit…I really ranted a lot, didn’t I?“, he whispered, but Derek could still hear it, “I…I should go, I understand. I overstayed my welcome.“

He attempted to push himself up, his muscles aching from the hangover and hard couch he had been laying on. Though something inside of his chest ached as well. Before Five could stand up, Derek stopped him. The feeling of a hand on his shoulder was enough to make him freeze.

“Mr.Five, that’s not what I meant. You obviously needed to talk about it“, Derek took a deep breath as he looked him over, “And even though I didn’t understand half of it…You don’t need to feel ashamed.“

His words washed over Five like a wave, most of his focus still spent on the simple touch. He wanted to both pull away, overwhelmed by this simple act of comfort, but also lean into it like a starving man in the desert. So he ended up doing neither, just standing there until Derek pulled away again. Five wanted to say so much, but no words made it up his throat and through his lips. After a long and pregnant pause, he simply nodded and made his way out of the appartment. Derek didn’t stop him that time.

————————————

They didn’t talk about that incident for quite some time. For a few months, they went about their daily routine, making small jokes in between, drinking coffee and tea together in the morning. Until eventually, Five mentioned it again.

“What I said about my age, Dolores and my family…did it bother you?“

They were in the middle of sorting through reports, arguably the most boring part of their job, where it sometimes became necessary to fill the silence. Derek only glanced up for a moment before he grabbed his stapler off the desk.

“Why should it? You always seemed…more mature than others. And I’ve known about your family for months. I go through your files just as much as you go through mine.“

Five blushed a bit at the last remark. It was true, he had searched through Derek’s files on a regular basis. Maybe out of paranoia that he was working for the Commission somehow, even though that wouldn’t make much sense. And to know that Derek was doing the same…it strangely grounded him a bit.

As they continued to work in silence, Five’s mind went back to that morning when Derek had touched his shoulder. It hadn’t been an accidental or manipulative touch, it had just been a simple expression of human emotions. He recalled one time when he had been four years old, still thinking that parents were the heroes children made them out to be. They had watched a movie in which a son had hugged his father and his toddler mind had decided to recreate it. But instead of hugging him back, Reginald had pushed him away and sent him to bed without dessert.

Never trust a hug, he had sternly told his adoptive son, For it’s just another way to hide your face.

Ever since then, he hadn’t attempted to hug another human being. But that had been over five decades ago, surely it couldn’t hurt to…

“Could I try something?“, Five broke the silence once more. He hated how uncertain and young he sounded, like a teenager or child, but he couldn’t stop himself.

Derek noticed his different tone too, but decided not to comment on it. During the entire time that they had worked with each other, he had noticed that some things took more out of Five than the average person. So he simply nodded and stood up as Five approached, his arms hanging loosely at his sides until he realised what the other man was planning. Once the realisation dawned on him, he couldn’t hold back a smirk and lift his arms slightly.

It took Five a few seconds to bring himself to lean into the hug. The second that he did, fireworks went off in his brain. Sparks of colour and noise, all blending together into one picture. It was overwhelming, but he needed more. It was beautiful and hurt his eyes at the same time.

For just a few moments, everything melted away and time stood still. This wouldn’t heal all of his wounds by any means. He was still damaged, maybe beyond complete repair. But it was a start at least, a bandage on his cuts so they wouldn’t get infected. Even though he knew it wouldn’t last, Five allowed himself to feel happy, just for a few seconds.

————————————

During one of his days off, while watching a movie that Allison had recommended to him, Five’s phone buzzed. Strange, his siblings never texted him. They always called, ever since the attemp at a group chat had gone south. So he unlocked his phone and glanced at the text.

Derek: Hey, 5.  The pipes in my appartment burst and it will take a few days until it’s fixed. Would you mind if I maybe crashed on your couch?

For a few seconds, Five contemplated his choices. He could just say no, spare himself the trouble. But on the other hand…he wouldn’t mind not being alone for a few days.

Five: Sure, just stop by. You know the address, right?

Instead of getting a written response, he simply received an emoji of a hand holding its thumb up. Five still hadn’t completely understood the appeal of those modern hieroglyphics. He really was an old man.

Derek arrived not even half an hour later, carrying a bag that held the bare essentials. A few changes of clothes, toiletries and a book or two for entertainment. Five was sitting on the couch, on which he had placed a spare blanket and pillow for him. One cup of coffe rested in his hands and on the small table in front of him…

“You made me tea?“, Derek asked as he set his bag down and went to join him on the couch. The TV was on, playing a movie that he recognised as Brokeback Mountain. Normally he had always been the one to prepare their drinks and he hadn’t minded it either.

Five nodded, fiddling with his own fingers as he watched him pick up the cup. He had been a bit nervous about getting it right. Tea wasn’t his department after all. But the way Derek exhaled after taking his first sip, he knew that he must have done something right.

“Thank you, I appreciate it“, Derek smiled and kept his hands around the warm mug as he inhaled the familiar scent of green tea. It was quite comforting, just like Five’s presence next to him.

As the movie progressed, they both ended up shifting a bit more towards the middle of the couch. Sometimes Derek moved, sometimes Five did, almost like a dance, until they eventually touched shoulders. Five found himself relaxing sooner than the previous timest hey had touched.

When Derek’s hand moved to cover his own, he didn’t stop him, looking forward at the screen. It was slightly overwhelming, but nothing he couldn’t handle. During the climax of the movie however, Five gulped heavily and slowly turned towards Derek, who did the same.

“I’m way too old for you“, he attempted to lighten the mood, but it came out much weaker and desperate. At this point he could see every little detail of Derek’s eyes, the way the colours mixed together, every little imperfection and vein.

Derek cleared his throat slightly, for once not as light hearted. He seemed not as clueless as Five, but hesitant nonetheless. The coffee and tea on the table had been forgotten long ago.

“Your age is the least of my concerns right now“, he whispered back and readjusted his glasses before he repeated the same words that Five had said to him a few months ago, “Could I try something?“

At that point, Five felt like he was drowning. He felt lost, a sensation he had become rather familiar with. He could end this all with one simple word or one shake of his head, for he knew that Derek would respect his consent. But at the same time, he didn’t want to let this opportunity go. So despite not having taken in a breath for almost a minute, he found himself nodding.

Their lips didn’t touch. It wasn’t a desperate kiss like in romance movies meant for teenagers. Instead, it was a soft kiss on his cheek that he felt…warm and without the pressure to do more, not that Five would want that. Like a ray of sunshine warming his skin in the morning, right before the worries of life fully registered in his mind. Derek smiled as Five practically melted into the touch, pulling away after a few seconds.

“Good?“, he asked carefully, just to make sure he hadn’t gone too far. Five smiled a bit and brushed his chaotic hair back behind his ears.

“Yeah, good“, Five simply replied and pulled his legs up against his chest. He wasn’t sure whether he would ever be ready for a proper kiss or saying the three words that seemed to fall from people’s lips so easily. But that maybe wasn’t necessary. They communicated that through other means. Like how Derek prepared Five’s coffee in the morning or how Five’s expression lit up when his desk partner entered the room.

————————————

On the first of October in 2025, they decided to move in with each other. Five teased that it was merely to reduce costs, since they spent most of the time in Derek’s appartment anyway. It had much more life than Five’s place, with small things that made it feel like home. And getting his coffee before work certainly had its advantages. Derek simply smiled at that explanation, not bothering to engage in a meaningless discussion. Instead, he grabbed his coat and handed Five his cup.

“Happy Birthday, Mr.Five“, he said with a wink before heading off to work, leaving a frozen Five behind.

————————————

A few days after his birthday, Five started his investigation into the Keepers support group. Going undercover meant that he had to put on a disguise, so he went for a mix of Top Gun enthusiast and school janitor. The mustache had been his idea, mainly because he missed the facial hair he used to have. It at least made him look a bit older.

Derek chuckled the first time he saw him in disguise. It wasn’t clear whether he was simply amused or making fun of Five.

“What?“

Five couldn’t help but sound a bit defensive. He hadn’t gone completely over the top, right? No, this was simply a cover, for security purposes.

Derek stepped forward, carefully tracing the mustache and making sure it was secure. Five sometimes got figuratively sick at how soft he looked with such simple gestures.

“Nothing. I think it works, Mr.Five“, he responded and looked him over from top to bottom, “You should get going now or you’ll be late.“

Of course, Five couldn’t have that. He still had work to do. By going on undercover missions, he could rise through the ranks and gain more information on how to keep his siblings safe. But despite all of that…At the end of the day, enjoying coffee or tea wouldn’t hurt.

————————————

I hoped you enjoyed this oneshot! I certainly enjoyed writing it, distracting myself from the mess we got in Season 4.

If you liked it, leave a like or a comment. It really makes my day and encourages me to keep going. Also, I would have an idea for a smaller additional chapter, set during Season 4. It would also have some angst. Would you be interested in that? If you are, let me know!

Until next time,

-Donna Lawliet