chaoscharme

[chaoscharme]

Weekly Affirmation

I am confident in my ability, my talent and my skill.

Mwah, chaoscharme

[chaoscharme]

Things to like about yourself

Why you’re a better person than you think, without focusing on on your looks or academic ability.

Creativity

Honesty

Diligence

Interest

Thoughtfulness

Empathy

Kindness

Patience

Adaptability

Supportiveness

Generousity

Confidence

Humour

Friendliness

Excitement

Warmth

Care

There are so many things I want to add to this list, I might have to make a part two. There is a lot of pressure on people in our current global society to be perfect, flawless human beings. However, this unattainable version of ourselves can often make us feel worse rather than better. Look at the list above. Read it once or twice. I guarantee you, at least three of those traits apply to you. If you don’t agree, try to get to know yourself better. Instead of focusing on being perfect, try being yourself. Try being the most positive and genuine version of yourself. Self doubt and self criticism is common, but you don’t have to accept it and continue living with it. You can accept it and decide you want to be happier than you are making yourself. Ditch the disrespect and starting loving yourself unapologetically.

Mwah, chaoscharme

[chaoscharme]

Weekly Affirmation

I am proud of my achievements and I am motivated to continue.

Mwah, chaoscharme

[chaoscharme]

Self Care Activities that Actually Help

My list of practical, achievable and useful self care tips that will actually improve your mood instead of enabling you to wallow.

Reply to your correspondence

Often if we feel low or our motivation is down, we find it tricky to respond to messages and calls from others. This allows unopened messages to pile up which creates stress and even panic. Instead of trying to ignore this problem, set a timer for 15 minutes. Then give yourself those 15 minutes to respond to as many of those messages as possible, starting with the most urgent messages first. If you cannot complete all the messages, take a minute to reevaluate. Can you give yourself another 15 minutes to finish the task today? If not, that’s fine. Assign the task for tomorrow, and repeat the process when you feel refreshed. If you are not able to give a thorough response to all of your contacts, I recommend drafting a universal message to send, stating that you are currently occupied and you hope to offer them a more appropriate message over the coming days. You can tailor this message to suit your needs and circumstances, and it reduces the amount of pressure on you to offer explanations for your absences.

Wash your clothes

Take the clothes you are wearing off. All of them. Strip your bed. Gather up any towels or tea cloths you can find. Wash them all. I cannot overstate the benefit of living in a clean environment, and wearing clean clothes. Even if you can’t wash everything, wash the essentials, and make sure you are wearing fresh clothes from head to toe. You can swap pyjamas out for more pyjamas, what you wear doesn’t matter. Just make sure they’re clean.

Water

Drink a pint of water with nothing added, no fruit, no cordial, nothing. Just drink a pint of water in one sitting. You are almost definitely dehydrated, just like everyone else. Hydration provides mental clarity, energy, and even relives stress. It reduces pains and aches in the body. It helps quell nausea and heartburn. Water is the quickest and easiest way to reduce physical pain or discomfort throughout the day. By keeping hydrated, you’re improving your quality of life almost instantly.

Stretch in bed or on the sofa

The last thing most of us want to do when we feel low or unmotivated is going for a run, or working out at the gym. Instead of pushing yourself to get a serious or intense workout in, try some stretches you can do from the comfort of your bed or sofa. Stretches will help relieve tension in the body and can increase your energy throughout the day. You don’t have to do anything crazy, just a couple of simple, effective stretches will do the trick.

Eat a “healthy” carb

People so often try to avoid eating carbs as they think carbohydrates are inherently unhealthy. This is simply not the case. While carbohydrates are often used in the production of unhealthy treats such as cakes, cookies and pies, they are not fundamentally bad for you. Carbs are our main source of energy, and if you’re feeling low energy is exactly what you need. Try eating a healthier alternative to those instant sugar rush carbs, such as rice, wholemeal pastas or breads, potatoes or oats. You can add other ingredients to these meals, such as berries to oats or some veg to pasta, to make a more filling meal. Everyone eats differently, but we all need carbohydrates in our diet to provide energy and nutrition, alongside other food groups. Creating a balanced diet is much more important than eating “healthy” all the time. Respect your body by fuelling it appropriately and regularly.

Clean yourself as best you can

Have a shower. Take your makeup off. Brush your hair. Clip your nails. Put deodorant on. Brush your teeth. Wash your hands. You might not have the energy for a full “everything shower” but you can probably do one of the things listed above to make yourself feel better about yourself and your hygiene. Don’t berate yourself if you’ve gone a while without practicing any of these for a while, life can be pretty difficult. Just accept your current situation and try to better it as best you can with the energy you now have.

Please reach out to a trusted person or a qualified professional if you feel you need extra support for any reason. You are not alone and you do not need to suffer in silence. Support is there.

Mwah, Chaoscharme

[chaoscharme]

How to stay consistent with your habits

With January almost over already, many of our resolutions have proved short-lived as our motivation and good intentions fall by the waste side. This is my short guide to keeping focused throughout the year, learning and maintaining habits and reaching goals.

Reward good work

If you are staying consistent and meeting your goals regularly, try carving out a bit of time to play or celebrate your new wins. All work and no play makes it very difficult to stay motivated and enthusiastic about your goals and dream life. Make sure the process of improving yourself is enjoyable as well as efficient.

Review goals and adapt

Often we begin working towards a new goal and realise we actually don’t feel like that goal aligns with our dreams anymore. Instead of throwing in the towel, try to assess regularly if your goals are still part of your dreams, and try to adapt existing habits and behaviours to suit the needs of your new intentions. Often we are only changing our behaviour slightly, but it can be easy to write off all of our hard work in favour of a blank slate. Don’t waste your efforts by refusing to assess your progress.

Surround yourself with as many positive influences as possible

One of the biggest demotivating factors in our lives are negative or critical influences. Instead of trying to block out negative ideals and influences, try introducing new ones that align with your mindset. These will automatically push out the more negative or unhelpful voices and will reduce the pressure on you to defend your actions to others.

Allow yourself to fail

By allowing yourself to fail, you’re admitting that you are not perfect in whatever habit or skill you are trying to build. When you can finally accept that all progress takes time and failure, you will feel more comfortable practicing your habits openly in your life, and won’t feel as overwhelmed if you’re struggling.

As always, my advice is exactly that, please adapt all the information here to fit your life and your goals, everyone is different and our needs are different too.

Mwah, chaoscharme

[chaoscharme]

Corporate Chic

How to dress well for young corporate fashion girlies

Disclaimer, this post is aimed at women and feminine people in the corporate world, but these tips can apply for anybody regardless of gender expression <3

1. Covering up vs stripping down

It can be difficult for young people to find a comfortable balance between their workwear and their personal style. The average young person may struggle to adapt their own oversized, cropped, baggy or revealing clothes to suit the needs of a professional work ensemble. The easiest way to do this is to create boundaries for your work clothes, and stick to them as much as possible.

Personally I like to keep my boundaries at three separate points, sleeves, skirts, stomach. I never wear sleeveless clothing, and my minimum sleeve boundary is a thick tank sleeve. My skirts are generally just above the knee, and never shorter than my fingertips. This makes me feel more comfortable when sitting, bending, or crouching down at work. My torso is covered at all times while at work, and generally this is the norm for office wear. I like to wear clothing that meets or overlaps in the middle to ensure that I feel comfortable and appropriate at all times.

2. Necklines, cuffs and waistbands

When choosing necklines for work clothing, try to limit the amount of skin shown for a more professional look. I recommend trying turtlenecks, round necks, boat necks or a shallow v-neck for best results. When wearing button downs, never unbutton more than three buttons from the top. If you have a v-neck that you would like to wear to work but you feel is too revealing, try layering a camisole top underneath it, or securing the neckline with a safety pin at an appropriate depth.

Cuffs are a really fun way to express some of your personal style, and to help accentuate your proportions. Personally, I love to wear a flared sleeve, or even a bubble sleeve. More exaggerated and interesting sleeves add a unique touch to your standard corporate outfits. Experiment with sleeves and sleeve lengths to find what you’re comfortable with.

Waistbands are often something we don’t consider when choosing office outfits, but they can make a drastic difference when styled intentionally. Personally, i generally opt for a high waist trouser or skirt, as I am rather short, and i find it easier to keep my outfits work appropriate this way. However, a low rise pant or skirt with a long top, or a mid rise trouser with interesting layering, or even different dress waistlines can create unique and more personal silhouettes for your outfits. Playing around with accessories along your waistband such as belts or waist beads can help put a personal stamp on your corporate ensemble.

3. Fabric and textiles

Office and formal setting require that you eliminate some fabrics from your wardrobe, such as denim. Much as a tasteful, tailored denim piece may look more formal or appropriate than a pair of faded, baggy slacks, many corporate dress policies will forbid denim from entering your office. Instead of wallowing in your sorrows, try introducing new fabrics to your workplace wardrobe. Along with your standard cotton blends that everyone has, try wool or wool blends, corduroy, satin, silk, velvet, tulle or mesh. There are a place for most fabrics in the corporate world as long as they are styles appropriately.

Introduce pieces that have multiple fabrics such as tulle sleeves or skirts, wool bands or satin accents to maximise your personal style expression. Also, do not be afraid to lean into an embellished look. Beading, embroidery, lace, sequins and metal hardware are all potential accessories you can introduce to add flair to your outfits.

4. Colours

The most common misconception on the internet about office wear is that you can only wear black, white and grey. I denounce this idea, and instead propose that more colour is injected into your wardrobe in 2024. Just because you are in a professional setting does not mean you cannot dress in vibrant and interesting colours. Mixing and matching different colours into your looks is a great way to put a professional outfit together without feeling drab or dull. This also means that you are more likely to wear the piece outside of work, making it a better investment and a more useful piece of clothing.

5. Accessories

Accessories are one of the easiest ways to spice up a boring and lifeless outfit. Accessories extend past jewellery, into belts, gloves, hats, scarves, umbrellas, coats, bags, nail varnish, makeup and shoes. Mixing and matching a large selection of different accessories will allow you to rewear the same pieces over and over again without getting tired of them. They also are a great way to link your outfits back to your personal style and help you transition between workwear and homewear more easily.

Remember, the most important parts of office outfits are that they are:

Appropriate

Comfortable

Personal

Rewearable

Making sure that your outfits suit you and feel comfortable for you is the key to looking and feeling fabulous at work.

Mwah, chaoscharme

[chaoscharme]

Please bring back wearing different types of shoes to different places?? I cannot keep seeing trainers and sneakers with every fucking outfit it’s too much like please bring back wearing boots and heels and sandals and pumps and brogues and loafers and tennis shoes and literally anything else I can’t keep seeing people wearing sneakers with every single outfit it’s too much

Mwah, chaoscharme