butterflies-and-cucumbers

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AU where as a form of self-torture OG!SQQ gets an artifact that lets him see the past. He wanted to know about the fantastic and easy and blessed disciple-ship YQY had while SQQ was being tortured. And also how easy it was for him to deal with his peers when even after sqq was made head disciple he was further bullied and tormented by his cohort.

It starts well-enough. YQ is selected by the sect leader himself. But it quickly goes downhill. YQ is still only an outer disciple at first. He trains and studies constantly, barely eating enough to sustain himself.

He's not bullied because his peers never really see him because he's always training. YQ is kind, but dismissive and has no time for anyone or any thing.

He's made an inner disciple to reflect his quick advancement, but is obviously frustrated by lessons on etiquette and diplomacy and he loses even more sleep training at night and in the early morning.

The artifact has no sound but SQQ can see the sect leader becoming more fond of yq and YQ not wavering in the slightest from his dedication.

For a moment, sqq starts to think the previous sect leader did something to Qi-ge to make him hate SQQ because this past he's seeing is clearly Qi-ge trying to get back to him.

There are maps with angry marks on the Qiu estate!

Then he sees yq sneak out to draw his sword and sqq is frozen in rapt horror as he watches the qi deviation and confinement.

Anyway he responds to what he's seen by throwing the artifact at YQY's head and shouting him down as a complete idiot who never listens and has no faith in him and what kind of idiot does he think sqq is? Did he think he could hide this forever?

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tgcf mutual: no one understands the Character.

mdzs mutual: today i blocked 5 people in the Character tag. i'm starting to suspect no one in this fandom can read.

svsss mutual: today i spent 6 hours brainstorming new ways for Character and Character to fuck nasty. here are the results.

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the first free use slut was the middle square in bingo

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Fake dating in reverse, Shen Yuan and Luo Binghe have a secret relationship hidden from their parents (Qijiu Shen Yuan's parents, both Peak Lords, both important symbols within the jianghu – and the established Emperor and Empress of the Demon Realm Binghe's parents)

So, both upset about something their respective son has done (idk), they decide to get their respective son engaged to someone they probably wouldn't tolerate to calm him down

(TLJ: Probably if you marry someone who commands respect and has a bad temper, they will tame you and you will calm down a little you little shit!!

LBG: Father, I am not you)

(Also, SJ: If you like beasts so much, I'll marry you to one!

SY: Maybe I bring so many beasts because I want you not to feel bad about being the only beast in the family!)

So when the Bingyuan secret boyfriends find out about each other's engagements, they're... well, hilarious. It definitely wasn't what they expected, but somehow it was great! They won't have to elope or pay for their own wedding!

The problem is that now they have to pretend that they don't tolerate each other to make the story of the forced wedding "to teach them a lesson" a thing. After all, they're both sure their families' opinions of each other are so bad that it's the reason the engagement was made. If anyone from the Bingyuan proposed it, no one family would approve it

So they are really dating, engaged, and pretending they can't stand each other, and even hate each other, provoking each other, fighting, attacking–

And then they sneak off to secretly snog, apologize for being a bit rude, and continue attacking each other in... other creative ways wink wink

(Most likely: Yue Qingyuan and Su Xiyan know perfectly well that their children are dating and in love with each other. They are both waiting to see how long their theatrics last before they reveal themselves. Both allow their respective husbands to be melodramatic while silently preparing a perfect wedding)

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sqq deaging fic where it deages him to his shen yuan body and yqy almost has a qi deviation because that's xiao shi, sj's sickly younger brother who died before the qius, before yqy's broken promise, before everything

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Shen Qingqiu, stand behind me. I will protect you.

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🎋🍃🐱💧🌾

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we can all play the pov game about how from shen qingqiu (shen yuan)’s perspective scum villain is a comedy, from luo binghe’s it’s mostly a tragedy up until the end, for liu qingge it’s a soap opera esque drama, and for ming fan and ning yingying it’s a wild episodic series that shifts genres so frequently you can’t possibly keep track about their youngest shidi trying to wife up their mom

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Liushen is so inherently yuri like you KNOW Liu qingge wants to be a knight swearing herself to the beautiful yet kind princess shen yuan . You know she wants to seat shen yuan on the horse and tell her to hold onto her tight. When thr castle gets invaded and they have to flee and come to rest at an inn and have to stay in one room to avoid drawing attention and they share a bed... I dare not go on

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puppy crush

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Bingjiuyuan idea. Transmigrator Bingge who basically starts his life over, prepared to make SQQ's life as miserable as possible. He's already dealt with his scum Shizun once, he'll do it again and make it worse.

Only, this time, there's two of them. SJ and SY. Binghe is super confused but alright, the more Shizuns to punish, the better? Jiuyuan look pretty similar, but they were just street urchins together and at the Qiu manor together. They both have mixed feelings about YQY.

LBH steels himself to deal with twice as much abuse. And then they're both kinder. The SY effect on SJ has him still cranky and strict, but not downright abusive. LBH still hates him, still expects the abuse for a while. And of course gets hit with the SY wifebeam and fantasizes about getting rid of SJ.

For a while, he fights with SJ over a pretty oblivious SY, who is just happy his Jiu-ge is being kind to LBH.

Until he's moved into the side room of the bamboo house and overhears something that changes everything. He cracks the door and oh, the sight of SJ plowing into SY is enough to fuel his spring dreams for YEARS.

Oh. Okay. Maybe he's alright with having two wifezuns. He's kind of got a thing for being domineered by SJ anyway, much to his dismay.

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is mbj thinking what sqh is thinking hes thinking, who knows

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LQG is struck by filial piety after LMY joins the sect. Having her close is a constant reminder of the responsibilities he's been putting off in favor of becoming strong.

He needs to get married.

However, without existing family he has no one to arrange it. Since he's a peak lord he goes to YQY to have the sect deal with it.

But YQY knows this is a very big political opportunity and cannot be squandered (as long as Liu-shidi is sure he doesn't want a love match?) so he assigns it to SQQ.

This opens LQG's eyes to the whole world of what SQQ actually does. He gains an appreciation for the thought that goes into the decisions the sect makes.

It also makes him question whether or not SQQ would have really tried to kill him. SQQ hates him personally, but sees him as a great asset to the sect and SQQ isn't wasteful.

However, the selection process keeps dragging on. No one is good enough for SQQ's standards (LQG shudders to think how exacting he'd be for a sect sibling he actually liked). To add more candidates, LQG goes out and gets a rare fruit that will turn into a baby so he can have a spouse of any gender.

SQQ rails on him for both not doing it sooner and wasting his time, but also for just going out on a super dangerous mission for no reason. Who's he's ranting he makes a throw away comment about how LQG night as well have gone and gotten [plot device miracle cure to fix a bad foundation].

Annoyed at being yelled at, LQG goes and does get that.

Rinse and repeat until sqq goes 'actually you're too valuable, you're marrying me."

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Svsss au where everything is same except Ning Yingying and Ming Fan are trying to matchmake Shen Qingqiu and Liu Qingge.

After the immortal alliance conference shen qingqiu becomes depressed and kneels over the sword mound every single day.

Then Liu Qingge comes and drops some rare beast on the door. Shen Qingqiu momentarily forgets all about his grief.

Seeing his excitement over Liu Qingge's gift, Ning Yingying and Ming Fan decides their shizun needs their shibo in his life. So they plot.

They start conversations about rare beasts and whatnot, trying to see what wild creature Shen Qingqiu was curious about, or never saw. They immediately go to Liu Qingge about it.

They get Shen Qingqiu to leave for expeditions with Liu Qingge. They invite Liu Qingge to come have tea with Shen Qingqiu.

And somehow it works. Shen Qingqiu is happy in the small moments he's teasing Liu Qingge. He's not kneeling in the clearing when he goes off the peak for missions. He rants about every beast Liu Qingge brings him.

Ning Yingying and Ming Fan celebrate their success. And Liu Mingyan hears what's going on. She approves and joins the matchmaking efforts.

Liu Mingyan schemes with the other two to get Liu Qingge and Shen Qingqiu to spend even more time.

When Luo Binghe comes back to the human realm the first thing he does is ask about his shizun. He listens to the rumors, investigates his health.

Then he learns about a book. Apparently Qing Jing Prak Lord and Bai Zhan Peak Lord are cultivation partners?!

Instead of going on a rampage, Luo Binghe thinks that his shizun would be sad if Liu Qingge died. So he decides to court both of them.

Liu Qingge is just confused to receive random items from Shen Qingqiu's long lost disciple. And why is everyone asking him about Shen Qingqiu and their closeness?

Meanwhile the matchmaking trio are watching all this unfold and Ming Fan is not happy Luo Binghe is trying to get in between the two. Ning Yingying and Liu Mingyan tell him to stop sulking or they'll scheme to matchmake him too.

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just one kiss

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True Zizhen might be his best bet of them all.

Especially is (I just realized) the girl is being treated as Wangxian's adopted daughter that would technically make Sizhui her big brother xD better not ask the brother if his crush how to go about courting her hahaha.

Okay mdzs post Canon brainworms.

Imagine this.

Wangxian on their travels find a young girl wounded on the road. Obviously they can't just leave her so they take her in and tend to her wounds. They learn that she's an orphan and end up just kinda adopting her?

They know she's too old for proper cultivation training but they still teach her everything they can because they want her to be able to defend herself and stand on her own when she's older.

Now imagine Jin Ling running into the on a night hunt one day. He's courteous enough to his uncle and his husband having matured quite a bit.

But then his eyes fall on the person behind the two cultivator and his heart just jumps into his throat and his palms get all sweaty.

He's immediately struck at how pretty the girl is and even fairy likes her, immediately going up to her to get head scritches. (much to Wei Wuxians dismay. He is very much keeping his hubby between himself and fairy)

But now Jin Ling has a big dilemma. He knows he wants to get to know this girl better but he worries that she'd be not be the proper partner for a sect leader. And he has nobody really to sk advice on how to court girls!

Uncle Jiang Cheng is out of the question because that man has just insane standards for his future wife and is still single.

Nie Huansang I at least think wound be somebody to have a very political marriage so also not a good candidate for love questions.

Jin Ling will DEFINITELY not ask his Uncle Wei Ying because while that guy did marry for love Jin Ling did see their courting and is sure that they are a very special case. Also it would be weird to ask the parents of the girl he intended to court how to court her. Lan Wangji is out of the question for the same reasons.

Lan Xichen is also not a good choice. While Jiang Cheng flavor of single is 'you don't deserve me' Lan Xichen's very clearly 'I do not deserve you'

Lan Qiren... Jin Ling is sure the old man would finally die if he ever got asked for love advice considering Wei Wuxian's daughter.

This once again drives home for Jin Ling how much he has lost when his parents died. Because surely his father could have given him the advice he needs.

In the end the only people he *can* ask are Sizhui, Jingyi and Zizhen.

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Well at least as far as he knows his father actually managed to win his wife back with some proper courting. (after effin it up the first time) and his tips might be more useful that whatever wangxian could give him. It's not like he has the best advice... But it would be feasible advice xD

Okay mdzs post Canon brainworms.

Imagine this.

Wangxian on their travels find a young girl wounded on the road. Obviously they can't just leave her so they take her in and tend to her wounds. They learn that she's an orphan and end up just kinda adopting her?

They know she's too old for proper cultivation training but they still teach her everything they can because they want her to be able to defend herself and stand on her own when she's older.

Now imagine Jin Ling running into the on a night hunt one day. He's courteous enough to his uncle and his husband having matured quite a bit.

But then his eyes fall on the person behind the two cultivator and his heart just jumps into his throat and his palms get all sweaty.

He's immediately struck at how pretty the girl is and even fairy likes her, immediately going up to her to get head scritches. (much to Wei Wuxians dismay. He is very much keeping his hubby between himself and fairy)

But now Jin Ling has a big dilemma. He knows he wants to get to know this girl better but he worries that she'd be not be the proper partner for a sect leader. And he has nobody really to sk advice on how to court girls!

Uncle Jiang Cheng is out of the question because that man has just insane standards for his future wife and is still single.

Nie Huansang I at least think wound be somebody to have a very political marriage so also not a good candidate for love questions.

Jin Ling will DEFINITELY not ask his Uncle Wei Ying because while that guy did marry for love Jin Ling did see their courting and is sure that they are a very special case. Also it would be weird to ask the parents of the girl he intended to court how to court her. Lan Wangji is out of the question for the same reasons.

Lan Xichen is also not a good choice. While Jiang Cheng flavor of single is 'you don't deserve me' Lan Xichen's very clearly 'I do not deserve you'

Lan Qiren... Jin Ling is sure the old man would finally die if he ever got asked for love advice considering Wei Wuxian's daughter.

This once again drives home for Jin Ling how much he has lost when his parents died. Because surely his father could have given him the advice he needs.

In the end the only people he *can* ask are Sizhui, Jingyi and Zizhen.