bibliophilicbi

[bibliophilicbi]

Damian Wayne comes across a classic christmas carol known well among the children of gotham… pt [1/?]

[bibliophilicbi]

in the realm of like, rich kid problems, I want to someday read/write a fic where Nightwing is slowly establishing himself as a full-fledged JL member and everyone is relieved because finally, there's a nice Bat on the Watchtower who doesn't just shoot down their plans and deny their mission requests. but. while Nightwing is kind, and polite, and charming in all the ways the Bat isn't, he's still Dick Grayson. and Dick Grayson grew up as a very rich kid's suddenly very rich kid, which is to say while Bruce might not take it personally, Dick has been fending off people almost his entire life who were trying to use him for his Dad's money. which is to say, I think once Nightwing is on board and the relationship between him and Batman is at least somewhat well-known, there is suddenly a rush of younger, less-experienced members trying to take advantage of Nightwing, mistaking that kindness and openness for willingness to either voluntarily, or involuntarily, infringe upon and cross Batman's clear-cut boundaries. bribing Dick for a better monitor shift with Batman is one thing (it doesn't really work, Dick can't bribe Bruce with much as it is) but trying to convince Nightwing to lie to Batman? to go against him? his dad? the man who pulled him up when he had nothing and gave him meaning again? that man?? and then comes the inevitable, chilling realization, that while Nightwing might wear a different mask, might wear an open smile on the Watchtower and with friends off-shift, there are some lines he won't cross, same as Bruce. he won't, sure as the sun rises and the rot rolls off the Gotham Harbor in the morning.

[bibliophilicbi]

Two days ago my husband said "...and he was pissed" and I said "don't say that around the kids!" so he corrected himself to "and he was liquid angry" and I've been laughing since

[bibliophilicbi]

i think if bruce saw clark deliver this line it would awaken shrimp emotions in him

[bibliophilicbi]

Bruce getting injured on a mission- not like I’m going to die injured but enough that he’ll need a few days to recover- and doesn’t get away in time before the JL or the GCPD if you want extra flavor, shows up, and everything is fine, but then Batman just… collapses.

And they’re freaking out and calling a medic and whatever. And no one is really paying attention to Robin. Until they try to move Batman into an ambulance, or carry him away, or take off his mask. Then he goes fucking feral. All of a sudden there’s this phantom on top of the bats chest, two batarangs held up in both hands, hissing, in a crouch, slashing at anything that tries to get close. And they can’t separate him from the bat, no matter how hard they try. Until Batgirl shows up. And she, honestly, doesn’t help either. She ties up some loose ends that Batman hadn’t managed, but acts just as feral and possessive if someone takes a step towards him. Robin is calmer, marginally, at least not waving batarangs around, and is instead sitting on Batman’s chest, watching everyone warily. And before anyone can do anything more, the two of them lift him and are gone, as much the myth as most Gothamites still believe them to be. 

Or… they manage to get Batman to the hospital/med bay, but Robin refuses to leave the room, stalking the doorway or sitting at his side, watching everyone with suspicious eyes. The others try to lock him into a game of uno, but he doesn’t focus, he’s twitchy and antsy, and can’t seem to sit still for very long before he’s back at Batman’s side. And then Batman wakes, a few hours later, and robin fucking transforms. Where he had been hissing and biting mere minutes earlier, now he’s smiling so wide it’s blinding, giving spontaneous high fives to people, though he still doesn’t stray too far from Batman’s side. And it’s then that everyone realizes who exactly Batman is. Not his secret identity, they aren’t there yet, but a father. His father to be exact. Before they thought it was some weird internship, maybe a team up, the way Batman and batgirl seemed to be. But not them. Not Batman and Robin. Because Batman holds the boy close, and kisses his forehead, and when they leave finally, Robin is holding his hand.

[bibliophilicbi]

Tim: *draped over Jason’s couch, deeply depressed*

Jason, awkwardly: Would you, uh, like a gun? That always seems to help me…

Tim, wailing: You want to turn me into Gun Batman???

Jason: Gun… what?

Tim: I thought I could trust you!

Jason: In retrospect I’m sure you can see where you went wrong there.

[bibliophilicbi]

its like your toe, except uglier, more sensitive, more disgusting, and you pee from it.

It also hurts when you hit it

I do not understand dick. I'll admit it. I'll say it.

[bibliophilicbi]

bet

support trans people.

[bibliophilicbi]

And that’s my Jornessey

[bibliophilicbi]

Fr Bruce (symbol of fear) raised a rabid feral traumatised lil circus boy into a symbol of hope amongst the heroes.

New JL members are listening to this black and blue human with no powers and isnt even scary (it’s not like he’s batman) and SUPERMAN keeps on looking at this guy with… pride????

Took less than one mission to find out. They have now joined the Nightwing fan club (Clark and Donna are the leaders) (Wally is the president)

(Some random fridge of a guy in a red mask hangs out sometimes and scoffs from time to time)

[bibliophilicbi]

[bibliophilicbi]

here is part 5! it's not a long as the others, but hopefully this will tide you over till the dinner scene!

(as i said in prev post that won't be posted till latest sunday/monday)

the post/thread that started this whole au

dinner scene: part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4

there's a masterlist now!

*the next morning*

*in telemachus’ room*

telemachus: *having got up early due to his excitement for later tonight*

telemachus: *looking down at something on his table* i hope he likes this, i can’t believe i spotted it in the market!

athena: *from behind telemachus* who likes what?

athena: *trying to peer over telemachus to see what he’s looking at* what do you have there, little wolf?

telemachus: *jumps in shock, not expecting athena to be there*

telemachus: *quickly wraps something in a silk cloth*

telemachus: *turns to face her* athena!- oh this? it’s a gift!

athena: *owl-like wide eyes and head tilted* a gift? for who?

telemachus: *scratches the back of head with nervous laughter*

telemachus: w-well after you left yesterday, i decided to head to the palace library to look up some more information on the gods

telemachus: i know i said it was other people’s words… but i still wanted to know a little more about lord poseidon, before we met again.

athena: oh-

telemachus: -and! and then i headed down to the market, and i spotted something i thought… i thought he might like it.

telemachus: *looks down at his feet* i know he’s a powerful god and a gift seems like a silly idea… but he’s also fathers’ friend so i just thought-

athena: *smiling and putting her hand under telemachus’ chin to lift it up*

athena: telemachus, you don’t have to be nervous or explain it all to me

athena: my uncle may be very powerful, but i’m sure he’ll appreciate you getting him something.

athena: *internally to herself* and if he doesn’t, i’m positive one look from odysseus will change his mind

athena: *ruffles telemachus’ hair* so there! no need to worry!

telemachus: *smiles*

athena: *putting her hand down and looking back over telemachus’ shoulder*

athena: so, what did you get him?

telemachus: oh! here let me show you!

telemachus: *turns around and moves to the side so athena can come next to him*

telemachus: *moves the silk cloth*

telemachus: what do you think?

athena: *realises what it is* i think… i honestly think he’ll love it

telemachus: *looks at her and smiles again*

*telemachus wraps the item back in the silk cloth and both him athena leave his room*

telemachus: how come you’re here so early anyway?

telemachus: not that i mind! but dinner isn’t till this evening?

athena: what just because its family dinner tonight, i can’t have family breakfast?

telemachus: *laughs*

telemachus: i wonder if mother and father are up yet…

athena: if they’re not, please let me wake your father up

telemachus: um sure? how come though?

athena: *thinks back to when she did early morning training with odysseus*

athena: *remembers the horror on odysseus’ face every time she ‘woke’ him & dragged him out of bed*

athena: oh no reason really

*both head to odysseus’ and penelope’s room*

[bibliophilicbi]

Low-key Amphi just chills with Hera, bitching about their husbands cause how you be the god witb a literal domain but get sent to the infirmary by what is essentially a toddler? Also how do you cheat on your wife (who is the literal goddess of marriage) witb fucking trees (nymphs)

okay! here's the first poseidon 'snippet' . this takes place before and during this scene!

hope you guys enjoy! ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

*a few months after poseidon had left apollo’s infirmary finally all free of holes all healed up*

*up on olympus*

zeus: *bored outta his godly mind after 20 years of entertainment (especially those last 10 years)*

zeus: *suddenly struck with an idea*

zeus: *to no one in particular* i think i’m going to go pay my brother a visit… just to check on how he is…

zeus: *disappears in a flash of lightning*

hera: *entering the room*

hera: *stares at the scorch marks on the ground where zeus just was*

hera: *to herself* as long as its nothing to do with a woman or illegitimate child… then i don’t care.

*below the sea in poseidon’s palace*

*poseidon enjoying some peace and quiet; when in a flash, zeus on one of his very rare visits, appears in front of him*

zeus: *looking around the room* so… how are things?

poseidon:

poseidon: *sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose*

poseidon: what do you want zeus?

zeus: *ignoring poseidon’s question* where’s your queen?

poseidon: amphitrite is out visiting her sisters…wait never mind that-

poseidon: what do you want?

zeus: *now looking at poseidon* can’t i come see my big brother?

poseidon: you never bother, unless you want something.

poseidon: *anger now in his voice* so out with it.

zeus: *putting his hands up in front of him* whoa! no need to get angry…

zeus: *putting his hands down and a smirk appears* ...remember how that ended for you last time?

zeus: *smirk gets bigger* how you let odysseus beat you like that, i have no idea…

poseidon: *glaring at zeus* do not speak that name in my home

zeus: why my dear brother? are you perhaps… scared?

poseidon: *falling right into zeus provocations*

poseidon: i am NOT scared of that mons- mortal!

poseidon: he merely took advantage of my state after using a lot of my power!

zeus: *under his breath to himself* that power still didn’t kill him though, did it?

zeus: *to poseidon this time* but you’re not in that state now, are you? nor have you been since you left olympus… so what’s holding you back now?

poseidon: *raising an eyebrow at zeus* holding me back from what?

zeus: *knows he has poseidon hook, line and sinker*

zeus: i understand you can no longer hurt him or his family; unless you want to incur the wrath of my daughter… and i suppose even my wife

zeus: but you can make trouble for him still, can’t you?

poseidon:

zeus: *notices the slight hesitation*

zeus: or maybe you are truly fearful of him now? the mighty god of the seas, terrified of a mortal king.

poseidon: *blinks and then goes back to glaring at zeus*

poseidon: i told you i am not sca-

zeus: -then what’s stopping you?

poseidon: NOTH- *coughs* nothing.

poseidon: *crosses his arms and looks away from zeus*

zeus: *laughs knowing he’s done what he came here to do*

zeus: well, i shouldn’t stay too long away from olympus... enjoy the rest of your day brother.

zeus: *disappears in another flash of lightning*

poseidon: *looks at the scorch marks on his floor*

poseidon: he always leaves a mess…

poseidon: *thinking over the conversation again*

poseidon: i’ll show him who’s scared.

*outside the shores of ithaca*

poseidon: *looking the nice clear weather and seeing the merchant ships coming to and from ithaca*

poseidon: it would be a shame if something disrupted this...

poseidon: *smirks* *summons his trident & lifts it to the sky*

*the wind picks up and storm clouds quickly start forming*

poseidon: *can hear distant shouts of mortals reacting to the sudden storm*

poseidon: *laughs to himself* perfect.

poseidon: well, i guess i’ll leave this to brew. i’ll check back later to see what damage has happe-

poseidon: *a full body shiver comes over him out of nowhere*

poseidon: *turns to look at the ithacan docks where he can see..a mortal?*

poseidon: why i am i bothered by that mo-

poseidon: *sees deep red eyes and realises who the mortal is*

poseidon: -oh no.

*the king of ithaca odysseus stands there, glaring into the storm*

odysseus: *in a cold voice* I am going sailing with my son. There will be no issues, is that understood?

poseidon: *even though he knows odysseus can’t hear him* aye aye captain!

poseidon: *with a whimper calls off the storm immediately and quickly dives back under the water*

poseidon: *before he can completely leave, he can hear the voice of odysseus saying “good.”*

poseidon: *about to head straight back home but pauses*

poseidon: *remembers odysseus said he was going sailing with his son*

poseidon: *knows he may be god of the sea, but he can’t always be there to control what the residents of said sea get up too*

poseidon: maybe i should just make sure there’s nothing to make him angrier at me

poseidon: *secretly follows & stays near odysseus’ and telemachus’ ship*

[bibliophilicbi]

Okay so I did some brief research and found out that the whole Athena vs Poseidon thing happened much later

But I just figured since they already have beef, it could be that Athens existed before the odyssey. (In the au)

When Ody finds out about the seating arrangement, he has a shit ton of olives brought in and asks Tele (who doesn’t know the beef) how much he loves the water fountains and whether he prefers olives

To which Tele (who realised water fountains = Poseidon) (but didn’t realise olive = Athena) just goes like

“Oh water fountains are spectacular! Compared to those Olives are just meh. (Bros low-key a little confused why you’d compare a fountain to food but just assumes it’s so Poseidon likes him more and can become his friend too)

okay! part 4 is here! still no dinner scene but hey, who doesn't like a telemachus and athena moment? huh? huh?

the post/thread that started this whole au

dinner scene: part 1 | part 2 | part 3

*later that day* *telemachus walking around the palace ground and speaking with athena about poseidon & also tomorrows family dinner*

telemachus: so, you said lord poseidon is your uncle, right?

athena: *under her breath to herself* unfortunately

athena: *to telemachus this time* he is indeed my father’s brother.

telemachus: what does he like? what’s his favourite food? does eat with you and the other gods on olympus?

athena: *not expecting to play 40 questions about poseidon*

athena: HU- *coughs* why do you want to know? i thought you studied the gods when you were younger?

telemachus: i mean yeah, but those are other people’s words. what better way than to ask his actual family?

athena: *regretting this conversation, but answers because it is telemachus asking*

athena: if you are looking to strike a conversation with him, i can say for certain he will be interested in anything about his kingdom, the sea.

athena: as for food, i’m sure you know we gods, do not require mortal food for sustenance.

telemachus: *confused and stops walking*

telemachus: *turns and looks up at athena* but you ate breakfast this morning with us? and other meals?

athena: *stops walking also and laughs a little at his confused face*

athena: *ruffles telemachus’ hair* yes i did. we can find it enjoyable, whether it be an offering, during a feast or with…

athena: *stops ruffling his hair & smiles warmly at telemachus* family.

telemachus: *smiles*

telemachus: *continues walking*

athena: *continues with him*

telemachus: so, you still never said what his favourite food was?

athena: *shrugs* i don’t know, fish?

telemachus: *laughs* well we certainly have plenty of that!

*both continue talking and walking together*

*a short while later*

telemachus: ok so even though he does have a place to live on olympus, he doesn’t live there? how come?

athena: the sea is his domain, i would expect he feels more comfortable being always part of it. he knows everything that is happening on and in it then.

athena: also, i’m sure that having my father be king of the gods while also being his younger brother, is not something he would personally want to be around all the time.

athena: i think if it were my younger brother…

athena: *imagines ares as king of the gods* *shakes the thought immediately away*

athena: *waves hand in front of her in dismissal* never mind that thought.

telemachus: *eyebrow raised in confusion* uh ok.

athena: as i was saying, my father, while he is a great & wise king of us gods, occasionally having to sometimes deal with his...

athena: *thinks to the lighting shaped scars on her face and body*

athena: …games, does not always end up good for those who play them.

telemachus:

telemachus: so, he just prefers living in his palace under the sea basically?

athena: pretty much, yeah.

athena: maybe you could save some more of your questions for my uncle at dinner tomorrow?

athena: trust me, i’m sure he’d love to talk about himself.

telemachus: yeah, i’ve got so much to ask him!

telemachus: not just about himself, but how he and my father came to be such good friends!

athena: *laughing to herself as she knows the truth of said friendship*

athena: oh i too would like to know…

athena: *has a thought* little wolf, you’re helping your mother and the palace servants plan everything for tomorrow, correct?

telemachus: yeah i am!

telemachus: actually, i probably should go and find mother to discuss things.

athena: *gently holds his arm before he can run off* before you go, i believe it would be best if we sat your father and my uncle right next to each other don’t you think?

athena: i normally know your mother and father would sit together as king and queen, but this is a family dinner, is it not?

athena: *grins* friends should be with friends.

telemachus: *holds hand up for a high five* that sounds like a great idea athena! that means you’re next to me, right?

athena: *hive fives and then smiles at telemachus* of course.

telemachus: *smiling back* okay, i’ll go and let mother know!

telemachus: *waves before heading into the palace* bye ‘thena!

athena: *waves back* goodbye telemachus.

athena: *now to herself* oh tomorrow will be fun indeed.

[bibliophilicbi]

okay! part 4 is here! still no dinner scene but hey, who doesn't like a telemachus and athena moment? huh? huh?

the post/thread that started this whole au

dinner scene: part 1 | part 2 | part 3

*later that day* *telemachus walking around the palace ground and speaking with athena about poseidon & also tomorrows family dinner*

telemachus: so, you said lord poseidon is your uncle, right?

athena: *under her breath to herself* unfortunately

athena: *to telemachus this time* he is indeed my father’s brother.

telemachus: what does he like? what’s his favourite food? does eat with you and the other gods on olympus?

athena: *not expecting to play 40 questions about poseidon*

athena: HU- *coughs* why do you want to know? i thought you studied the gods when you were younger?

telemachus: i mean yeah, but those are other people’s words. what better way than to ask his actual family?

athena: *regretting this conversation, but answers because it is telemachus asking*

athena: if you are looking to strike a conversation with him, i can say for certain he will be interested in anything about his kingdom, the sea.

athena: as for food, i’m sure you know we gods, do not require mortal food for sustenance.

telemachus: *confused and stops walking*

telemachus: *turns and looks up at athena* but you ate breakfast this morning with us? and other meals?

athena: *stops walking also and laughs a little at his confused face*

athena: *ruffles telemachus’ hair* yes i did. we can find it enjoyable, whether it be an offering, during a feast or with…

athena: *stops ruffling his hair & smiles warmly at telemachus* family.

telemachus: *smiles*

telemachus: *continues walking*

athena: *continues with him*

telemachus: so, you still never said what his favourite food was?

athena: *shrugs* i don’t know, fish?

telemachus: *laughs* well we certainly have plenty of that!

*both continue talking and walking together*

*a short while later*

telemachus: ok so even though he does have a place to live on olympus, he doesn’t live there? how come?

athena: the sea is his domain, i would expect he feels more comfortable being always part of it. he knows everything that is happening on and in it then.

athena: also, i’m sure that having my father be king of the gods while also being his younger brother, is not something he would personally want to be around all the time.

athena: i think if it were my younger brother…

athena: *imagines ares as king of the gods* *shakes the thought immediately away*

athena: *waves hand in front of her in dismissal* never mind that thought.

telemachus: *eyebrow raised in confusion* uh ok.

athena: as i was saying, my father, while he is a great & wise king of us gods, occasionally having to sometimes deal with his...

athena: *thinks to the lighting shaped scars on her face and body*

athena: …games, does not always end up good for those who play them.

telemachus:

telemachus: so, he just prefers living in his palace under the sea basically?

athena: pretty much, yeah.

athena: maybe you could save some more of your questions for my uncle at dinner tomorrow?

athena: trust me, i’m sure he’d love to talk about himself.

telemachus: yeah, i’ve got so much to ask him!

telemachus: not just about himself, but how he and my father came to be such good friends!

athena: *laughing to herself as she knows the truth of said friendship*

athena: oh i too would like to know…

athena: *has a thought* little wolf, you’re helping your mother and the palace servants plan everything for tomorrow, correct?

telemachus: yeah i am!

telemachus: actually, i probably should go and find mother to discuss things.

athena: *gently holds his arm before he can run off* before you go, i believe it would be best if we sat your father and my uncle right next to each other don’t you think?

athena: i normally know your mother and father would sit together as king and queen, but this is a family dinner, is it not?

athena: *grins* friends should be with friends.

telemachus: *holds hand up for a high five* that sounds like a great idea athena! that means you’re next to me, right?

athena: *hive fives and then smiles at telemachus* of course.

telemachus: *smiling back* okay, i’ll go and let mother know!

telemachus: *waves before heading into the palace* bye ‘thena!

athena: *waves back* goodbye telemachus.

athena: *now to herself* oh tomorrow will be fun indeed.

[bibliophilicbi]

Ody walking along the shore back to his place when a random ass fish just flies into his face.

Bro doesn’t even get upset, he knows that was deserved.

part 2 of the dinner scene in this ongoing au! first part here! third part here! fourth part here!

*very early morning, the next day*

*odysseus is making his way back down to the hidden cove*

(he totally wasn't kicked sent out their marriage bed by penelope, who was giggling to herself saying how "he should be excited to go and invite his friend to family dinner")

odysseus: *mumbling to himself* how do you even invite a god to a dinner? especially one that hunted you for 10 years?

odysseus: *arrives at the cove's beach*

odysseus: *sighs* well here goes nothing

odysseus: *looking out to the sea* poseidon! i again need to speak with you about something!

*unlike last time poseidon doesn't appear straight away*

odysseus: poseidon!

*still nothing*

odysseus: *rolling his eyes* do i really have to?

odysseus: *red eyes activated* POSEIDO-

*the water starts moving and poseidon is coming out it, and looks...sleepy?*

poseidon: *holding up his hands* i'm here! i'm here! please turn off the red eyes...

odysseus: *red eyes deactivated*

odysseus: ...well what took you so long to answer? you're normally much quicker

poseidon: *yawning* gods sleep too y'know?

odysseus: *surprised* ...oh, uh-

poseidon: -let's just get to the point. what do you need this time, king of ithaca?

odysseus: um.. dinner?

poseidon: *squinting at odysseus*

poseidon: *starts being salty* you woke me up before helios himself has taken to the sky? to get you DINNER?

odysseus: *starts being snarky back* oh yeah! my first thought of the day was, i could really go for dinner now instead of breakfast, GUESS I'D BETTER GO CALL POSEIDON

poseidon: *eye twitching* listen here you little shi-

odysseus: I'M INVITING YOU TO DINNER YOU-

poseidon: *pointing at odysseus* YOU JUST SAID "DINNER" NOTHING ELSE-

poseidon: *now confused* -wait, why are you inviting me to dinner?

odysseus: *sighing and holding the bridge of his nose* look telemachus wants to have a family dinner-

poseidon: *pointing at himself* family?!?

odysseus: -AND he wants me to invite my "friend"

poseidon:

poseidon: ...and if i refuse?

odysseus: *sighs again* look- i know we're not friends, but my son thinks we are.

odysseus: *now looking at poseidon* and as much as i hate to admit it, you really impressed him when he met you

odysseus: *looking down & speaking under his breath* hades knows why-

odysseus: *back to looking at poseidon* so im not gonna force you this time. but i am just going to ask you, if you would please come to dinner?

odysseus: *with pleading eyes* i understand you don't want to do it for me. however as a father speaking to another father, could you please do this for my son?

poseidon: *closes his eyes*

poseidon: *thinking he could just say no and go back home,,, but-*

poseidon: ... i accept.

odysseus: *in genuine shock* thank yo-

poseidon: *grins* i mean obviously your son is smarter than you, he sees just how great i am. clearly he gets that from his mother and not you.

odysseus: *regretting asking* (¬_¬)

poseidon: so when is this "family" dinner?

odysseus: tomorrow evening.

poseidon: tomorrow evening then. i will take my leave for now.

poseidon: *turning back to head back into the sea*

odysseus: *grins remembering something* oh i just remembered my son will be bringing his friend too

poseidon: *without looking back & waving his hand in a not worried motion* i'm not bothered by another mortal odysseus

odysseus: *shit-eating grin gets bigger* oh no, i'm sure you're not...

odysseus: *in a sing-song voice* this is however no mortal though~

poseidon: *stops*

poseidon: *turns with slight worry* what do you mean no mortal?

odysseus: oh you know, its only... athena.

poseidon: ATHENA?!

odysseus: well i'd best be getting back! don't forgot tomorrow evening poseidon!~

odysseus: *runs back to the palace laughing*

poseidon: ODYSSEUS OF ITHACA!

so.... part 3 coming soon! part 3 is here!

(listen i know i said two parts but i ran away with these two and their bickering)

[bibliophilicbi]

I adore that you kept “god friend” as the description I can’t breathe oh my god

(part ???? of this ongoing thread/universe/au?) (part 2 & part 3 & part 4 to this!)

(will be two parts as my brain wouldn't stop coming up with more nonsense as per usual)

*not long after telemachus met his dad's enemy 'friend', the god of the seas poseidon, for the first time*

*poseidon has fled (gods don't flee they briskly walk away) left to go back to the sea*

*odysseus, penelope & telemachus are having dinner*

telemachus: *smiling while retelling the meeting to penelope* -and he was so nice! father is so lucky to have him as his friend-

odysseus: *slightly chokes on his food at poseidon still being referred to as his friend*

telemachus: *looks at odysseus* -father are you ok?

penelope: *who knows odysseus' real relationship with poseidon*

penelope: *hasn't had much entertainment in 20 years*

penelope: *wants to stir the pot some more* ignore your father my dear, please continue telling me all about his friend

odysseus: *looking at penelope*

odysseus: *under his breath* penelope why?

*dinner continues with poseidon being the subject much to odysseus' dismay*

telemachus: *enjoying the family dinner*

telemachus: *gasps*

odysseus & penelope: ???

telemachus: we should have a big family dinner! father you can invite lord poseidon! i'll invite athena!

telemachus: *happy with himself for thinking of such an idea*

odysseus: *doesn't want to shoot down his son's idea, but also DOES NOT WANT TO SPEND ANY MORE TIME WITH POSEIDON*

odysseus: *scrambling for an excuse* son, he's a god and surely is very busy an-

penelope: *with a devilish grin* -and i'm sure will make time for his friend! what a wonderful idea telemachus! i'll let the palace cooks know!

penelope: off you go dear husband~ go and let your friend know~

odysseus: it's evenin-

penelope: first thing tomorrow then!

odysseus: *sighs in resignment* yes my love

telemachus: great! i can't wait to tell athena-

*athena appearing out of nowhere*

athena: i heard my name and came.

odysseus: athena?!

telemachus: athena!!

penelope: oh lady athena!

athena: *smiling whilst looking at telemachus* what would you like to ask me telemachus?

telemachus: oh yeah! we're going to have a big family dinner! father just needs to invite his god friend-

athena: *confused as she's odysseus' god friend* but i-

odysseus: *panicked* wait-

telemachus: -lord poseidon!

athena: *wide-eyed in shock*

athena: *slow blinking* did you say odysseus' friend is p-po- my uncle?!

telemachus: *nods and smiles* yeah, i thought you knew!

odysseus: *wondering how he'll explain this whole situation to athena*

odysseus: *under his breath* well now she knows...

penelope: *laughs to herself*

(to be continued!)

(okay i know i said in the reply to the ask i'd post the dinner scene, but my brain wouldn't stop throwing stuff for me to add in the run up to dinner. so there WILL be the dinner scene, but that will be in another post... tomorrow? -depending on how my work day goes-) (future/present me: it was not just one more part, nor did i upload it the next day)