activemagnesiumcream3000 - Tumblr blog

activemagnesiumcream3000 · 10 hours ago

Text

you ever done a shit so diabolical you have to take off all your clothes and sit there goose-pimpled and naked as the day before you were born as some terrible divinity calls down a righteous fury of fiery rain upon you for all of your mortal sins . that just happened to me

#haha #dunny #ok im on my phone and mispelled that but tbat id quite funny so im keeping it #funny meme #for you #dank memes #humor #dark humor #memes #lol #relatable #sorry chat i gotta speak my truth ans hope it reaches the right person

3 notes · View notes

activemagnesiumcream3000 · 3 months ago

Text

tryna figure out what makes us intrinsically human since it isn't love, fear, empathy, intelligence, capacity for learning etc, and have come to the conclusion that actually maybe there is nothing special about us and that is ok. and really it is that or 9/11 jokes so .

#i have a lot of thoughts about 9/11 jokes #and also the human condition #because for all the things ppl tote as what makes us unique it is just. not true #'love' WRONG animals can love + also aroace people. next #'empathy!!!!' there are people with various disorders that means they do not experience empathy. i trust i do not need to explain why sayin #that they're not human is AWFUL #fear? guess what. have you listened to the magnus archives. most things that exist feel fear.#but you can bet your fucking ASS that NOTHIGN else in the known universe makes 9/11 jokes #anyway 9/11 is very interesting to me as a non-american because it means i have learnt about it quite objectively #like not even getting into the conspiracy stuff. because that feels like a slippery slope and i am not well educated enough on the american #politcal state at the time and bush etc etc #HOWEVER 9/11 screams propaganda to me as someone on the outside #and yes. undeniably it was a tragedy. however it was also used to justify huge amounts of violence against brown and muslim people #see . the war in iraq and also the horrific islamophobia that still exists in the states and world wide #and also. so many much worse things have happened in usamerica since then #but for some reason this is still held up as The Tragedy To End All Tragedies #idk it's interesting

0 notes

activemagnesiumcream3000 · 3 months ago

Text

grand wizard smeeblebarb the girthy has been arrested for evading his taxes for the last 300 years and the much more serious crime of not wearing any fucking underwear to grand wizard council meetings for the last 200 years, more at 10

#we all saw this coming #and by all i mean me. the only person whoknows and cares about GWStG #grand wizard smeeplebarb the girthy #wizard #wizardposting

0 notes

activemagnesiumcream3000 · 3 months ago

Text

tbh the community i have no beef with but find the strangest is the 'bloody nails' beauty aesthetic??? like you do you but also the cognitive dissonance i felt seeing beauty products devoted to recreating the effect of my mental illness is NOT to be underestimated. for just forty all american dollars you too can look like a stressed out teenager with ocd picking compulsions who forgot to buy bandaids again

#like i dont gaf personally if it makes people happy and confident then who am i to judge #ocd #actually ocd #dermatillomania #funny #haha #joke #lol #relatable #but also bc it almost exclusively happens on campus #the fuckin. chemist that is SO SO CLOSE TO ME on campus is. closed????????? at 8am????????? and then again by 4 ???????#so actually it is not my fault at all that i dont have bandaids

8 notes · View notes

activemagnesiumcream3000 · 3 months ago

Text

there are several beautiful women in my phone named toll fee overdue pay now to avoid a fine trying to contact me. is this love

#jokes on you beautiful women named toll fee overdue pay now to avoid a fine! i dont own a car #funny #haha #lol #meme #relatable #joke

22 notes · View notes

activemagnesiumcream3000 · 4 months ago

Text

thought a little too hard about wild geese by mary oliver 4 dead 17 injured

#funny #meme #haha #relatable #mary oliver #wild geese #poetry #ANYWAY. YEAH.

14 notes · View notes

activemagnesiumcream3000 · 5 months ago

Text

wrote this for an assignment but i think it is. maybe relevant beyond that

#politics #us politics #im so serious. fucking vote #if you can vote. vote. because if the republicans get office again it's going to actually fuck over so many people GLOBALLY #current events #uspol #vote #please vote

0 notes

activemagnesiumcream3000 · 6 months ago

Text

me, perfectly breaking slices off a loaf of frozen bread with my bare hands to prove to potential mates that i am a competent spouse:

the grocery store cashier who makes minimum wage watching me do this: sir i have asked you multiple times to leave the freezer section,

#i joke of course i would never inconvenience someone in customer service #but my parents freeze our gluten free bread until we need it so i have developed A Particular Set Of Skills #meme #haha #funny #relatable #man fuck these tags #true story #too real

5 notes · View notes

activemagnesiumcream3000 · 6 months ago

Text

putting perfume on my left wrist and cologne on my right and brackish water on my neck to telegraph to passerby in the streets that i am non binary

#nonbinary #transgender #queer #meme #haha #funny #lol

59 notes · View notes