wolfsrahne28

[wolfsrahne28]

Like, I know my personal feelings and my pain probably shouldn’t matter more than people enjoying a show. I don’t want to bum people out. But I also want to believe my pain matters in some capacity. That I shouldn’t have to feel like this because of a show. A part of me wants people to be mad, to be offended, like how I’m offended. And I feel like I have to be mad and voice my feelings about it, and hope others will be mad with me. Because the alternative means admitting that none of it matters. That I really don’t matter. And for some reason, that feels like admitting defeat, and accepting that I don’t matter, and that this show was right. Or that whoever made this show was right. Like they’re some entity out to hurt people. People like me. Or if there aren’t people like me, then they’re out to hurt no one, and they just don’t care.

I don’t know.

All I know is that I’m tired of hearing about that Penguin show in Batman circles, or how hot and crazy Sofia is, or how I should watch it bc it mentions Riddler. And I don’t want to have to explain to everyone that I hate this show, and that any mention of it hurts me when I just want to enjoy my Batman stuff, and my Riddler stuff, which I only do to feel good. And then being of reminded of this show makes me feel bad again. But I can’t explain this, because I haven’t watched the show, so someone will probably just dismiss me as a hater. Or not care bc Sofia and Penguin are so cool in the show, that what I fee isn’t important. Or I’m wrong. Or that I’m insecure, that I’m just another one of those ugly, fat, purple-haired feminazi ruining video games by making other women characters ugly and fat because I’m ugly and fat, like being ugly and fat is a bad thing. Like wanting to feel seen somehow makes me evil or a bad person, or that I’m a problem. And I always try to either not say anything because I’m scared of how other people will react to what I say, or I do speak out as someone wanting social change, and I’m instantly proven right. That what I have to say isn’t important enough. That they say all those examples I listed and don’t listen when I say, “I’m hurting, and my pain is real. Why do you not care? I’m a human being in pain. Does that not matter?”

Everyone says Penguin on HBO is so good. That it’s this show that’s well written and makes you think about things. And maybe I’m missing out by never watching it. But I think I’m okay with that. I don’t know if I’m looking too much into it or not into it enough. But whenever I see Penguin, I just hear this voice in my head that says “We care about you. You matter.” And I think that because he’s fat, because he looks like me. Only to then remember it’s Collin Ferrell in a fat suit. And then that voice says. “But not really. We don’t actually want you here.” And then I see Sofia, someone small and pretty, not big or ugly like me. And it feels like that voice is just telling me. “You don’t matter at all.”

I don’t know if Penguin is a good show. And I don’t think I ever will. Because even though I’m giving in and trying to be smaller, be prettier, it hurts that I tried so hard to love myself as someone who isn’t that, I couldn’t. And sure, maybe that big, fat girl wasn’t me. Maybe she never was. Maybe I was always meant to be skinny, as some people are. And that’s okay. Some people are meant to be bigger. Some people are meant to be smaller. And there’s nothing wrong with either. But I still try so hard to love myself as I am now, but I can’t, because of that voice. I can’t even enjoy something I that people keep telling me is good, that I should try, because every time I think about it, that little voice comes back. I see Colin Ferrell, and I see their Sofía Falcone, and think “You don’t matter. Not yet. Because you don’t look like them.”

And I don’t know if that’s what they wanted me to think, if they wanted to hurt me, make me feel like I don’t matter because I don’t look like that. Or if they wanted me to think there was nuance to the show, that underneath that first layer of the casting, there’s something meaningful. But I can’t get past that first layer. Because if that’s just the first layer that hurts that much, how much more can it hurt if I peel back those layers and watch the show? Will it tell me again? That I don’t matter? And that scares me. And it hurts. It hurts knowing so many people can enjoy something that makes you feel so worthless. Like people don’t care that something can hurt another person and make them feel that horrible and worthless. Like it doesn’t matter. Not just my pain, but other people’s pain. Unless I’m the only one who’s hurting. Which just means I’m the one that’s wrong. That I’m making a big deal out of nothing. I mean, if everyone else is enjoying it and has no problem, nothing that I say or feel is that important.

Like maybe… I really don’t matter.

[wolfsrahne28]

Everyone says Penguin on HBO is so good. That it’s this show that’s well written and makes you think about things. And maybe I’m missing out by never watching it. But I think I’m okay with that. I don’t know if I’m looking too much into it or not into it enough. But whenever I see Penguin, I just hear this voice in my head that says “We care about you. You matter.” And I think that because he’s fat, because he looks like me. Only to then remember it’s Collin Ferrell in a fat suit. And then that voice says. “But not really. We don’t actually want you here.” And then I see Sofia, someone small and pretty, not big or ugly like me. And it feels like that voice is just telling me. “You don’t matter at all.”

I don’t know if Penguin is a good show. And I don’t think I ever will. Because even though I’m giving in and trying to be smaller, be prettier, it hurts that I tried so hard to love myself as someone who isn’t that, I couldn’t. And sure, maybe that big, fat girl wasn’t me. Maybe she never was. Maybe I was always meant to be skinny, as some people are. And that’s okay. Some people are meant to be bigger. Some people are meant to be smaller. And there’s nothing wrong with either. But I still try so hard to love myself as I am now, but I can’t, because of that voice. I can’t even enjoy something I that people keep telling me is good, that I should try, because every time I think about it, that little voice comes back. I see Colin Ferrell, and I see their Sofía Falcone, and think “You don’t matter. Not yet. Because you don’t look like them.”

And I don’t know if that’s what they wanted me to think, if they wanted to hurt me, make me feel like I don’t matter because I don’t look like that. Or if they wanted me to think there was nuance to the show, that underneath that first layer of the casting, there’s something meaningful. But I can’t get past that first layer. Because if that’s just the first layer that hurts that much, how much more can it hurt if I peel back those layers and watch the show? Will it tell me again? That I don’t matter? And that scares me. And it hurts. It hurts knowing so many people can enjoy something that makes you feel so worthless. Like people don’t care that something can hurt another person and make them feel that horrible and worthless. Like it doesn’t matter. Not just my pain, but other people’s pain. Unless I’m the only one who’s hurting. Which just means I’m the one that’s wrong. That I’m making a big deal out of nothing. I mean, if everyone else is enjoying it and has no problem, nothing that I say or feel is that important.

Like maybe… I really don’t matter.

[wolfsrahne28]

Quirkyrahne28 ➡️ Wolfsrahne28

[wolfsrahne28]

!!Please don’t skip 🍉

Please, please, look at my donation campaign and help me. I have newborn children, and my son Noor needs milk, health care, and diapers. He is prematurely born and small in size and suffers from tachypnea. He needs help and treatment. We do not have money, and everything is high-cost. My husband and I lost our jobs and there is no source of income because of the Gaza war. I would like you to help. To care for my children and provide the necessary needs for my child Noor, please donate even a little thing to save my child’s life Please help us by sharing. Reblog and Donate here

You are our hope. I will be very grateful to you. Donate 10$ enough the change my life❤🙏🏼

Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #120 )

[wolfsrahne28]

500 FOLLOWER RAFFLE TIME!!!

the rules r so simple just reblog this post!! You don't have to be following but I'd very much appreciate if you did cuz we have fun here

I'll be letting this go on for a week and Monday, December 2nd I will draw for the lucky winner :3 thank you all again for supporting me and I can't wait to keep making silly things on here for you all!!

[wolfsrahne28]

Help a baby evacuate Gaza

Verified by @/90-ghost

Majd is only a year old. Yet in one year his home has been destroyed and his health is severely deteriorating!! He needs an oxygen tank to breathe properly, but with how dangerous and unsanitary conditions have gotten from the war, Majd needs to evacuate NOW!

His parents, Khadija and Yousef Al-Habil, are campaigning EVERY SINGLE DAY to get enough money to evacuate and save their son!!!

Recently Majd had to be hospitalized due to chest problems.

Currently their campaign is at €29,681 out of €50,000!

Please help save Majd by donating ($5,$15,$50) and sharing his campaign 🇵🇸

@punkeropercyjackson @c-o-z-m-o @crapscicle @thexnightmarexgarden @hollow-port

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[wolfsrahne28]

HBO’s The Penguin hates women unless they’re conventionally attractive. Prove me wrong.

Oh, you don’t believe me? Well here’s Sofia Falcone and Carla Viti in the comics, and there’s the actresses the show is using. (No hate to the actors btw, I’m just making a point.)

Sofia Falcone in the comics. Big. She’s tall. Beefy. Has big, red hair, and has a Roman nose.

Sofia Falcone in the show is played by a skinny, conventionally attractive woman. She’s shorter, and has a straight nose.

Carla Viti in the comics. Stocky, heavy, round. She is FAT. Fat is not a bad word or a bad thing.

And… here’s who they hired. Notice something off? You’re right, she’s skinny and “prettier” by bs Hollywood standards.

I see so many people talk about how much they love Sofia bc she’s crazy and violent, and apparently breaking gender stereotypes while doing it. And I don’t think there’s anything wrong with conventionally attractive female characters being violent and evil and playing roles more reserved for male characters. But the fact that apparently the show has a problem with women doing that and being an important character UNLESS they’re “pretty” is very telling.

So yeah, as if I needed more reasons to stay away from Reevesverse, and I already had so many, it also hates women that aren’t “pretty”. Which is already an issue with most comics, but this is somehow doing WORSE than comics in that regard.

And the worst part? NO ONE GIVES A SHIT. Comic bros rant whenever a white character is made black, and then others jump at defending the race lifts. But when women who are either buff or fat are made skinny, no one cares. Not the comic bros who want 100% accuracy, and not the more progressive fans who should be want more body diversity. But no, everyone is too distracted by the shiny keys of Sofia being violent, crazy, and hot being jangled in front of their face, that they don’t notice this blatant and obvious disrespect of women. This show doesn’t love women or break stereotypes like people think it does. But everyone seems to either not see it because they’re distracted, or they simply don’t care about women that aren’t “hot”. Either way, it’s frustrating seeing everyone falling for this.

I can’t… I just can’t do this shit, my guy.

[wolfsrahne28]

[wolfsrahne28]

Normally, I just like something or throw it into my drafts. But I literally couldn't not reblog this.

[wolfsrahne28]

big day today

[wolfsrahne28]

[wolfsrahne28]

Ref: video

[wolfsrahne28]

New genre of meme just dropped.

DONALD TRUMP GOT SHOT AT!!!

Do you think Professor Layton took the shot or why are you sending me this???

[wolfsrahne28]

This is exactly why I never fucking post.

"This post [art/article/etc] is really neat, I will reblog it but alas I need to properly tag it and I am too tired to so I will put it in drafts and properly post it later"

[wolfsrahne28]

One of my favorite genres of post

[wolfsrahne28]

Hey runners (and walkers)! Thought this might be helpful :)

[wolfsrahne28]

Adobe is going to spy on your projects. This is insane.