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I’d like to unsubscribe from being hungry. Thank you.
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Bruh, I’ve been so out of control with these binges. Maybe it’s my sign not to restrict so hard.
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I’m sick.
This brain feels tired. Tired of looking at the confusion in the mirror. How did we get here ?
They say that the human body shows the most beautiful journeys.
I have beautiful journeys , my C section scar from being a mom, my tattoos with personal meanings and my piercings with expression. My hair cut to show my growth in lengths.
It’s a bad day again.
A bad day is where we discuss brain 2 brain,
The ugly journeys,
These scars on my arm , oh they show how strong I am ?
They show a PSYCHOSIS of what could’ve been the end of me so again I write and write because when your words are too loud , I’m depended on.
My words can’t be loud, they watch.
My words can’t be dark, they watch.
My words can’t be fake, they watch.
They the ones who mark you human enough to handle and not human enough for society, predictable safety excuses of conditions.
What am I saying ?
There’s TOO MUCH to process ,
I look in the mirror and WHO IS SHE, or that .. maybe it.
No meds no meds
Eat eat snack.
Smoke tolerate sleep:
WHO in the higher heavens gave me the opportunity to be an AMAZING mother but a horrible example of love.
A body abused by calories that could’ve fed a tribe. Abused by men she figured her body wasn’t worth the love. A stomach that hangs lower than she SAID she wouldn’t let happen, body shows examples of long term stress, long term deprivation of many things. Acne ew , hair , ew , dry feet , ew , always sweat ew. Feeling huge feeling loud feeling insecure every loud pressured step I take.
I pray the day I can love enough to see me.
I don’t see me.
#random#personal#momblr#overweight#plus size#weightloss#i need to lose so much weight#weight loss diet#i wanna lose weight#ptsd#obese#bipolar#mental#mentallyill#weight issue#body disorder#bingedisorder
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i wish i hated food
i wish i got nauseous just thinking of eating
i wish the sight of food made me want to claw my stomach out
i hate constantly fighting myself
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Jorge Mayet -Â Lecho de mis raices, 2009
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