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Gobble gobble, Turkey Thots 🦃🦃🦃🍗🍗🍗💯

Hope today you’re holding space for GRAVY 🍲 (and maybe something to stuff 👀). Don’t forget: Pumpkin spice might be basic, but you’re anything but. 🎃✨

May your day be full of:

• Buttered rolls 🥖 (and maybe some buttered souls, too).

• Hot thighs 🍗🔥 (turkey or otherwise, no judgment).

• Extra helpings 🥧 (because we’re ALL about seconds, amirite?)

And if you ain’t sharing memes or leftovers, you’re CANCELLED like a preheated oven with no turkey in sight. 💅

Pass this on to 5 other Turkey Thots to secure a plate full of good vibes, gravy boats, and drama-free family convos today. If you don’t, you’ll be haunted by the spirit of dry turkey for 13 years.

Stay saucy, stay stuffed, stay grateful. 🦃🍷❤️

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Tonight I put “take mushrooms and see Shen Yun” on my bucket list.

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How do you describe your artistic impulse?

Mine is that I feel a core responsibility to contribute to human culture by leaving cool, thoughtful, and insightful things behind. To share my understanding and interpretation of what I’ve learned about being a human with future humans.

I’m genuinely driven by the need to be archived. I want my existence to be a riddle that’s purposefully solved.

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Theme songs that slap: part infinity

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Pay me $3mil for this idea: Oreos but the cookies are Chips Ahoy. Not chips ahoy flavored cream, not Little Debbie Oatmeal Pie crème between two Chips Ahoy, normal Oreo crème with Oreo-sized Chips Ahoy.

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Enough analysis- we all get it. What are the solutions?

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“don🦍t believe anything your brain tells you after 9 pm” wrong. the prime time for decision making is when you🦍re sleep deprived

^example of what life would be like if we used gorillas instead of apostrophes

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If you swim through the middle you get a red coin and your air meter refills

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Can someone explain to me why so many foreign TikToks/Shorts POV videos have someone wearing one nitrile glove? Sometimes blue sometimes black but never both hands. They’re often unboxing vids, but never products that necessitate a sterile hand or food safety.

At first I thought it was a cultural trend, because these tend to be in underdeveloped countries with foreign looking, remote rural backgrounds.

I’m starting to get the sense that it’s somehow related to algorithm promotion, either because they’re copying a content farm video with billions of views who wears gloves, or as a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy by the AI marketing analysis bots.

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I remember reading very far into da Vinci Code before it dawned on me that the story was fictional. Where you’re whole world view just literally shifts mid-media-consumption.

I just had the same experience realizing Megadopolus isn’t a Metropolis reboot. I thought the only reason we were letting Coppola suggest putting live actors in every screening was a callback to silent film accompanists. You’re telling me this is all for some sci fi flick about Adam Driver with a Caesar bowl cut shake and go???

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mulholland drive to the polls

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Let’s make the $5 Footlong jingle go viral and use it as a means to bully corporations into remembering how much mediocre fast food is supposed to cost????