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The temptation, when adapting a really iconic detective, is to delve into his personal backstory. That's the devil talking.

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good music should beat the shit out of you

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Being a classic rock fan is so funny. Why am I invested in the neuroses of some guy from half a century ago

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CBT but they just turn this on and let it whack the fuck out of your cock

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i'm bisexual because i'm attracted to both flesh and machinery

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You're obsessed with the rotting bloated corpse. It's like your Jungkook. Embarassing!

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Brain Cell Wrapped:

You deflected 4097 intrusive thoughts!

You had Biz Markie's Just A Friend stuck in your head for a record streak of 283 days!

48% of the things you thought about buying wound up on your grocery list!

Your questionable crushes received 69% positive responses from your friends!

You contemplated doing 110984 tasks!

17 idiotic phrases have been introduced into your vocabulary!

You imagined 43 new OCs in contrived fetish scenarios, but one came out on top: that one you aren't sure whether they're transition goals or partner goals!

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the most obnoxious gif i've ever made

inspired by this: this

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being convinced your keys are in your backpack because when you shake it you can hear them but upon closer inspection it's just a really small foley artist imitating your keys with a piece of glass and a crumb

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Favorite little detail of The Magician nobody ever mentions: his belt is a little ouroboros.

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