torirosepatrocolus

[torirosepatrocolus]

when Todd said "it's so beautiful" and proceeded to fall on the snow throwing up and started sobbing I felt that.

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me as a parent:

child: can you tell me a bedtime story?

me: of course. *deep breath* It was a warped tour of 2005. There were two guys, pete and mikey. They were hella gay for eachother. Amazing new mexican sunsets...

[torirosepatrocolus]

eurymachus: lets have open arms instead

ploites in elysuim: KEEP MY WORDS OUT OF YOUR MOUTH

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playing fall out boy songs about mikey way for the bugs in the grass cause they might never hear such a tragic gay love story again

[torirosepatrocolus]

never gonna date men

because pete wentz tried it once and look what it did to him

[torirosepatrocolus]

What is Achilles and Patroclus's relationship?

Historians: just some friends who were really close

Madeline Miller: homos

Troy (the movie): good old cousins who care about each other

Socrates: oh my god, there's nothing romantic about their relationship. They were platonic friends. Don't you dare say anything Plato

Plato: yeah, yeah, we all know they are lovers. The real question though, who was the top and who was the bottom? Achilles was definitely bottom in my opinion.

Homer: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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this is how it went right

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modern day romance has nothing on whatever the fuck was going on on pete wentz's livejournal

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Foggy: you look great, pro homo

Matt: do you mean no homo?

Foggy: its a new era, support the gays

[torirosepatrocolus]

having an homer fan in your life is so funny they will post "DUMB FUCK I HOPE HIS BOYFRIEND DIES" in your gc and attach an image of ancient greek pottery

[torirosepatrocolus]

The Song of Achilles:

Patroclus: oh god he's hot

Thetis: no

Achilles: Mom! This isn't a phase! Leave me aloneeeee

Chiron: I ship it

Odysseus: They are so gay how can no one tell

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billy/william/teen: what? You don't believe me?

agatha: It's not that I don't believe you...it's that I don't believe you AND I don't care

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Clint: Its so dark in here

Kate: Don't worry, I got you

Kate: *stomps feet*

Kate: *sketchers lights up*

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Today is the only day you can reblog this coneheads

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michael: I need you to swear to me-

tori: fuck you

michael: what?! no-

[torirosepatrocolus]

I’m going to say the quiet thing out loud

Rio was the real victim here.

Rio lost the most.

Rio deserved better.