thegrumpynerddad

[thegrumpynerddad]

The Buttcraker

(Caption for the speech bubble since the rendering quality sucks butt apparently “you did NOT just give our daughter a farting doll for Christmas���”) Stay classy, stay safe, and, above all else, Stay grumpy…

[thegrumpynerddad]

Grump, Party of Five

So like…yeah this post has words and stuff for you to read! Been a hot minute since I’ve written a blog post! Normally I just drop a hilarious doodle for y’all to laugh at and peace out, but not today! Today you have literature! So I actually have a good reason for my absence as of late. You see, we have been…preoccupied. Very preoccupied. All two of you who have followed me on Instagram might…

[thegrumpynerddad]

Two is Company

So yeah…time for a major life changing announcement. This is a post I’ve had ready to go for a little while as it was supposed to announce something…well sobering. So yeah…that happened! It was very shocking to say the least and at times overwhelming. However, we found out today that one of the twins stopped growing a few weeks ago. Thankfully baby A is doing great and we saw her bouncing up a…

[thegrumpynerddad]

We Don’t Talk About Number 3

Stay classy, stay safe, and, above all else, Stay grumpy…

[thegrumpynerddad]

The Obligatory Happy Birthday Post!!!

Did-did that title seem passive aggressive? I don’t know, now that I’m reading it out loud it kinda does…but like I already used “happy birthday” or what not, so like I thought it would be a funny quirky way to say this time around? Whatever, I digress, with ZERO bitterness or resentment intended in aforementioned titles, it’s my wonderful wife’s birthday!!! She’s the big 33!! That’s it, she…

[thegrumpynerddad]

Cross Guard Confessional

So like…I absolutely enjoy my job and stuff. It’s kinda weird because at any given time during my workday I will look like I’m ready to have a nervous breakdown and to burst into tears, but yeah I love it! Anxiety is fun!!! So for those of you who don’t know what I actually do for a living…well that makes two of us because I don’t know what I’m doing about 90% of the time. But if I had to put a…

[thegrumpynerddad]

Shake it Off

Stay classy, stay safe, and, above all else, Stay grumpy.

[thegrumpynerddad]

8 Years of Magic

Y’know, statically marriages typically fail at years 7-8. Today marks year 8 of marriage for me. You know what that means? Means statically I’ve tricked her into staying married to me past the statistic point of calling it off! That’s right folks, she has yet to realize that she’s too good for me and could do WAY better! How did I do it? Well, I can teach you the ways of Grumpitiude and…

[thegrumpynerddad]

I’ll Never Get To Hear Your Voice

Yeah, this isn’t going to be a happy post folks. I’ll never get to hear your voice  or hear you call me dad I’ll never get to give you hugs when you’re feeling sad I’ll never get to help you build castles in the sand I’ll never even get to hold your hand I’ll never get to help you get dressed or tie your shoes I’ll never get to kiss away your boo boos No bedtime stories or late night…

[thegrumpynerddad]

Shower Thoughts

Greetings and happy Mother’s Day! You ever hear the phrase “kids say the darnest thing?” Babe, I’d like to believe that the dog stalks your beautiful bodacious behind for the same reasons I do: it’s just so admirable! Happy Mother’s Day hon. We would be so lost without all the light and joy you bring into our lives. The kids and I are blessed more than you know for having you. You are the…

[thegrumpynerddad]

Thanks Dude…

Yeah…not sure where he learned to be so savage. I blame his mother, girl is RUTHLESS! Oh, and my baby boy turns five this month…wtf is this shenanigans? I remember changing his poopy diapers, and now you’re telling me he’s halfway to double digits?! Bunch of doodoos if you ask me. Couldn’t be prouder of my little Tiny T-Rex. Daddy loves you (savage come backs and all). Stay classy, stay safe,…

[thegrumpynerddad]

We Got A Cat!

Whelp, this happened Yeaaaaah we got a cat. Never mind my wife’s side of the family is allergic AND my side of the family is allergic, but that sounds like a problem for future us! So there’s some thought to this madness. Y’all remember Sweets, our doggie who passed recently? Well, she slept in Princess’s room every night…and then she passed away…you see the issue? Our six year old was having…

[thegrumpynerddad]

A Feathered Friend

Stay classy, stay safe, and, above all else, Stay grumpy.

[thegrumpynerddad]

Sweets The Stinky Poochie

Yeah, it’s one of those posts again. Be sure to grab your tissues. Now, I like to believe that I’m my wife’s emotional support animal in life, but wasn’t always the case. You see, there was a very special poochie in her life way before we even met. Meet PrincessSparklesTheUnicornF’Days! Or, like, Y’know, SweetPea for short…because my wife is insane. Now Sweets and I met loooong ago (in dog…

[thegrumpynerddad]

A Grumpy Christmas Carol

A Grumpy Christmas Carol

[thegrumpynerddad]

Reading With Our First Grader <3

Reading With Our First Grader

Our little girl LOVES to read to us. Most of the time she’s just making up the story as she goes along, but there are plenty of times she tries her hardest! So this happened the other day… Sometimes the little errors are better than 100% accuracy! Keep it up Princess, you’re definitely my favorite reader ever ❤️. Stay classy, stay safe, and, above all else, Stay grumpy…

[thegrumpynerddad]

The Dreamlight Valley Saga

The Dreamlight Valley Saga

Oh hai there 😀 Bet you didn’t expect to see something from little ol’ me today! Yeah yeah, I can go on about how long it’s been since I’ve posted something, but I think I’ve abused that trope a few times over the last…what has it been…year? Two? Two years?! Jeeze I’m out of shape… Anywho! It’s been a hot minute. Last you heard from me, I believe I was telling you about how the beautiful Queen…