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my goals for the new year:
- wear more black
- put up with less fuckery
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“Dear world, I am excited to be alive in you, and I am thankful for another year.”
— Charlotte Eriksson, He loved me some days. I’m sure he did.
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“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something. So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life. Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it. Make your mistakes, next year and forever.”
— Neil Gaiman
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“Hope Smiles from the threshold of the year to come, Whispering ‘it will be happier’…”
— Alfred Tennyson
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“It is possible to be homesick for a place even when you are there.” ― Don DeLillo, White Noise
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“If you reveal everything, bare every feeling, ask for understanding, you lose something crucial to your sense of yourself. You need to know things that others don't know. It's what no one knows about you that allows you to know yourself.” ― Don DeLillo, Point Omega
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Appreciate Me For Everything Good I Have Done In The Past
When you die, the world changes into a funhouse. The funhouse is far away. It collapses at the speed of light.
I just made that up.
I live in a high-density urban area.
I am hard-working, detail-oriented, an excellent multi-tasker. My demeanor in social situations can be described as ‘low-level panic attack.’ I am honest, tactful, and ironic. I enjoy screaming. I think it’s funny when people scream.
I think the Nobel Prize is funny.
“I am going to email a shitload of people tonight.” I think that’s funny.
I feel angry. No I don’t. I am bored. I don’t understand how a number can be negative. One apple looks like one apple. What does negative-one apple look like?
The world is stupid.
The world I exist in is really stupid.
I can prove it
at night. In the park, at night, I can prove anything.
– Tao Lin
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“Sometimes I see something so moving I know I’m not supposed to linger. See it and leave. If you stay too long, you wear out the wordless shock. Love it and trust it and leave.” ― Don DeLillio, Underworld
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“Most artists are brought to their vocation when their own nascent gifts are awakened by the work of a master. That is to say, most artists are converted to art by art itself. Finding one's voice isn't just an emptying and purifying oneself of the words of others but an adopting and embracing of filiations, communities, and discourses. Inspiration could be called inhaling the memory of an act never experienced. Invention, it must be humbly admitted, does not consist in creating out of void but out of chaos. Any artist knows these truths, no matter how deeply he or she submerges that knowing.” ― Lewis Hyde, The Gift: Imagination and the Erotic Life of Property
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“I must change my life so that I can live it, not wait for it.”
— Susan Sontag
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the idealized version of my tomorrow self will fix this
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“Listen: I am ideally happy. My happiness is a kind of challenge. As I wander along the streets and the squares and the paths by the canal, absently sensing the lips of dampness through my worn soles, I carry proudly my ineffable happiness. The centuries will roll by, and schoolboys will yawn over the history of our upheavals; everything will pass, but my happiness, dear, my happiness will remain, in the moist reflection of a streetlamp, in the cautious bend of stone steps that descend into the canal’s black waters, in the smiles of a dancing couple, in everything with which God so generously surrounds human loneliness.”
— Vladimir Nabokov, A Letter That Never Reached Russia
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Emily Dickinson, from a letter to Susan Gilbert featured in The Selected Letters of Emily Dickinson
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The promise is not really for anything more than an escape from pain. It's for something different, something better—but ultimately something unattainable. – David Foster Wallace
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“As you get older you start doing things in reverse. You start cutting people out from your life. Your Christmas list becomes practically nonexistent. You don’t need to be the first in line for everything. You take less pictures because some memories are best kept in your heart and not your hard drive. And instead of looking for love, you dig for it from within.”
— bookmarks in my life (via c0ntemplations)
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