the-ventor

[the-ventor]

I guess you could say I like ww2, my favourite part of it honestly or what I would like to study is how people have been surviving during it. I saw documentaries like that on my TV but I'm not here when it plays. I've watched a cartoon about it though, it's absolutely beautiful and heartbreaking...if you want, I could send you the link. Apart from that, I guess Russian history too is fascinating, I'm currently learning the Russian Revolution and I'm also trying to learn Russian but I'm not successful at that... History itself is amazing, I wish more people would like it. Studying history where I live, I get comments like 'this is useless,where will it bring you?' Anyway, I've also been studying the first french revolution. However, studying for passion and school is two different things, and as much as I want to think of both as the same it's not very possible. But it's ok, I love history nonetheless and if you asked me things about them I would willingly tell you what I learnt...

By the way, thanks for listening to me :)

I don't know why I have been feeling bored and lonely lately... maybe it's because I had a fight with my irl friend? I dunno...I don't understand why I want to talk to people online.... it's ok I suppose...

I want a friend...I know this post won't be seen but still. I'm a bit lonely,and I would like to bond,this is very stupid I know,and I am playing a dangerous game,and I care,I care about my safety and everything,but for just a moment, I want to talk.

[the-ventor]

Thanks...I honestly didn't expect any replies...but if you do want to , we can talk about anime or maybe history or just life in general? Or any of your interests as well

I want a friend...I know this post won't be seen but still. I'm a bit lonely,and I would like to bond,this is very stupid I know,and I am playing a dangerous game,and I care,I care about my safety and everything,but for just a moment, I want to talk.

[the-ventor]

I want a friend...I know this post won't be seen but still. I'm a bit lonely,and I would like to bond,this is very stupid I know,and I am playing a dangerous game,and I care,I care about my safety and everything,but for just a moment, I want to talk.

[the-ventor]

Anyone want to listen? It's not that bad....

[the-ventor]

[the-ventor]

[the-ventor]

adults disciplining children: i think i will communicate with this brand new human in the loudest, rudest, most obnoxious and socially off-putting way possible

[the-ventor]

Unfortunately

Really fucked up that you can just inherit complexes from your mother and be fully aware that they're complexes from your mother but still do all that shit

[the-ventor]

my mom was trying to chew through some really tough steak and she turned to me and said “just call me The Gnawer.” she would do numbers here

[the-ventor]

[the-ventor]

It's back... except I want to use something sharp and pointy...

I want to burn my wrists, slightly,with a flat iron. I remember doing it once by accident and my parent yelled at me because they had just bought a new flat iron and I could have broken it. I remember it...I felt horrible,I didn't use the flat iron for a while...The burn mark stayed only for a few days...they didn't even ask if I was burnt... just...they only cared about the flat iron...Since it only lasted a few days and nobody cared or noticed,I could do it again right? Just small little burns...I wish...my nails were still long...I could dig my long nails into my skin...this creates marks into my skin...and nobody notices...I wish they would ask me if I am ok...yet I don't want them to...Nails...why won't you grow? My wrists feels naked and I want to mark it...I just... recently this want has surfaced...I don't even know why... it's like a thought...at the back of my mind...always,always...there...

[the-ventor]

This is me

[the-ventor]

I can't do it...life is too much and nobody truly gets it...

[the-ventor]

Nobody cares...I want a friend...will anyone...? Probably not...

I just...want a friend...is it this bad to ask...?

[the-ventor]

I just...want a friend...is it this bad to ask...?

[the-ventor]

Nothing lasts forever with me... probably because I'm a freak... and a bad person...

[the-ventor]

haha...