the-pen-in-hand

[the-pen-in-hand]

July 17, 2023

It's been quite a bit since I last wrote anything. I've been a bit busy with life in general and I also just haven't really been motivated to write anything. I have however continued to do artwork though.

Anyways, since I've started getting my tattoo work done I have had a total of 3 sessions. The first session back in April was just the outlining work for the design, then I went in May and got some of the colouring started for it. On Friday I went again for my third session and got more colouring and shading done, yet it's still incomplete cause it's a big piece and I have a low pain tolerance. LOL. Though it's still incomplete I think it's looking awesome.

On another note, my vacation will be starting this coming weekend and I have yet to make any plans. There are a few things I'd like to do over the course of those 16 days I have off but I'm just not sure if I'll be able to do them or if I'll have the money for it. I'm likely to stay at home and do art, maybe play some games too. Though I hope to at least make it to a movie or two. Well I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens.

[the-pen-in-hand]

May 6, 2023

So I've been pretty busy with working lately which in a sense is good. I also have been working towards some of my goals that I've had for awhile lol. One of which was to get a tattoo which I have finally done. I'm super happy with it too which is good cause it's permanent after all lol.

Next week is Mother's day and I don't think I got anything for my mom. It's also my sibling's birthday on Thursday as well. I also work this week too and there's my second tattoo session as well where I'll be getting the shading done for it done and maybe some colouring started for it too. So I'm super excited for that too.

[the-pen-in-hand]

April 8, 2023

Well it's been a year since I last posted anything on here. I had been quite stressed cause of the pandemic and not having a job. Unfortunately as a result of all the stress I fell into a depression and didn't feel like writing.

Since it's been a year, I should give an update. I have since gotten a job which has helped me with my depression a bit. I have still been doing artwork as well and for my birthday I finally had the courage to book myself an appointment to get a tattoo. I'd always been wanting one and so I'm happy that I finally was able to accomplish it this year.

Yesterday I had my first session for my tattoo and I was extremely nervous. Unfortunately my anxiety acted up a bit when I first arrived to the shop but once I got started it died down. I do think that the anxiety was also brought on by my excitement and nerves about getting my first tattoo. Though the tattoo session itself was long and painful, it was definitely worth it and I can't wait to get it completed.

[the-pen-in-hand]

April 5, 2022

It's been quite some time since I last wrote anything. It's not that I haven't wanted to write but that I couldn't bring myself to do so. The pandemic brought a lot of things to my life that has been hard for me to deal with. It's not that I lost people, like they passed away or what not, cause I haven't lost anyone to it. However I have lost myself. I feel so drained all the time. I wish to do a ton of things but have no energy or motivation to do them.

I still have yet to get a new job but I'm not even sure if that's what I want to do. I've been thinking for a very long time about going to college but I don't exactly have the money to pay for that. Though I guess if I did go to college I could apply for a grant or some loans and go into debt for it. The only issue I have with going to college is that if I wasted that money and didn't even end up with a career in the path I studied.

The one thing I've been able to be consist with is drawing. In the time I've been out of work I've done a bit of artwork. Still though I haven't sold any of my art as I don't have a proper store for it or anything like that. I have done some for friends mostly or just for myself. Anyways, this update is getting a bit long so I'm going to go now. Until next time.

[the-pen-in-hand]

November 2, 2020

Well it’s been quite a long while since I posted an update. Life has been pretty uninteresting currently. There’s a pandemic going on so that doesn’t help with my depression or anxiety. I don’t have a job either so there’s that to worry about as well. On the one hand I have plenty of time to be doing things that I never had time for but now I have no motivation to do them.

I have been working on my art a bit during this time. I’m currently working on my Christmas card design. I don’t know how many of the cards I’ll give out since I’m no longer working and because of the pandemic situation as well. I’ll be mailing out some so I need to get it done as quickly as possible. Another thing I’m working on is artwork for cover designs for my happy planner which I’m not even sure I’ll have much use for until I get a new job or if I manage to enroll in college or something.

Anyway, there’s not much to write about. I’ve mainly been staying at home (since the pandemic started) and I don’t really have much I’ve been doing either. I do hope to do some travelling once it’s safer to do so and maybe even go to college as I’ve wanted to do. But who knows what’s going to happen in the last few months of 2020. We’ll just have to wait and see. Hopefully things will get better soon.

[the-pen-in-hand]

April 4, 2020

  Well things are going okay I guess. The world is dealing with a pandemic at the moment and therefore we’re supposed to stay inside as much as possible. The only time we should go out is to get groceries or if we are essential workers. Since I don’t currently have a job it means that I should stay at home as much as possible. Though some people are getting antsy with having to stay inside, I’m not having trouble with it since I already have been staying inside. 

[the-pen-in-hand]

March 23,2020

 Well I haven’t really been into writing that much lately. I thought that with all the time that I’ve had off after loosing my job in January that I might get back into it and work on some stories or stuff yet I haven’t even bothered. There’s been a lot of things going on in the world right now and because of that I have plenty of time to do things that I should do but I also have been super stressed out because of it. 

  I have been doing some artwork to pass the time. I recently got myself a TikTok account and have uploaded a couple videos of my cats as well as some speedpaints of artwork I’ve done either in the past or recently. With everything that’s going on right now life seems to be at a standstill and tough. Hopefully things will get better soon.

[the-pen-in-hand]

February 25, 2020

It’s been a long while since I last wrote. Things have been really hectic. In January I celebrated my 28th birthday as well as the last day at my job. I have yet to look for a new job but it’s been rough.

I haven’t done a lot of artwork. I’ve had plenty of time to do it but just haven’t really felt motivated to work on it. Recently my bf lost his father. He died peacefully at home on the 20th. I’m currently working on the funeral service stuff which will be taking place this weekend. I drew a portrait for the service and I just have to get it printed for Saturday. It’s been rough.

[the-pen-in-hand]

January 14, 2020

  Well I should probably be worried about not having a job soon since it’s literally gonna be over in a couple weeks but I’m not too worried at the moment. I don’t have any plans for what I’m going to do next exactly but I would like to do some learning. I have no idea what I’d like to learn though since I haven’t really thought too much about it. 

  I probably should be looking into another job right now but instead I’m just fooling around on the computer. I downloaded some mods for the Sims 4 since I like them and I plan to do some building in the Sims 4 when I can get it to load again. I’m also looking forward to the new stuff pack that is going to be released on the 21st of this month which is pretty soon. I’m thinking of getting it, since it will be a week before my birthday, and I think it’ll be fun to add to the game. I don’t have all the packs or anything but I do enjoy it just the same.

  Anyway, I’ve been working on my art a bit as well. I’ve been working on illustrating a short story for a friend of mine but it’s taking be longer than it probably could if I had a set deadline for it. She didn’t give me any sort of expectations for when she’d like me to finish them so I have free reign on whenever it gets done, if ever. In the process of working on the illustrations though I’ve learned that I still have a lot to learn when it comes to perspective and that I’m still not that great at drawing backgrounds. Hopefully this year will be a year full of learning and progress in my art. We’ll just have to see.

[the-pen-in-hand]

January 8, 2020

 Well it’s been a week into the new year and I’m not sure what I’m doing just yet. I have goals again this year as I usually do but as usual I doubt that I’ll complete them all since I never do. The holidays were pretty rough on me. I was pretty excited about things, like getting gifts for my family and friends as well as making artwork as well but they ended up turning into a hard time. On Christmas Eve just before midnight we lost one of the cats, she was ten years old. The cat had been sick for about a month before she succumbed to whatever it was that she was sick with. The next day which was Christmas day I was informed by mom that a cousin of hers had passed away that morning. 

  Despite the sadness over the holidays I did enjoy spending time with my family. On the 28th of December I went over to my sister’s place for Christmas dinner and present opening. My mom and brother were supposed to come but my mom was sick and told my sister several days in advance that she was not going to be attending and that we should invite our Aunt instead because our Aunt wasn’t going to be celebrating Christmas. So we invited our Aunt and planned for it to be the four of us only to have our brother cancel on the day of the dinner because he was in a bad mood because he had broken his phone. In the end it ended up just being my sister, my aunt and I which was nice.

  For the new year I have some goals in mind. I would like to set up a patreon account so that I can pursue my art more. Another thing I would like to accomplish this year would be to sell my art. Hopefully this year will be better than the last but it’s only just the beginning of the year so we’ll just have to wait and see.   

[the-pen-in-hand]

December 21, 2019

 Well it’s almost Christmas and I’m completely unprepared. I haven’t really gotten all the gifts that I needed to get, nor have I finished wrapping what I have gotten. I was also planning to make some stuff for my mom and sister for their gifts but I have yet to do them. I have however started on one of those things, just haven’t finished it yet.

  I’m supposed to work tonight. I don’t know if I actually will though. Since it’s Saturday there’s a chance that it could get cancelled. If I work it’ll be good cause I’ll make money but if I don’t I can do things that I need to get done, like my Christmas gifts stuff done.

[the-pen-in-hand]

December 17, 2019

Well it’s nearing the end of the year already and I have hardly accomplished any of the goals I set for myself at the beginning of the year. It’s been a rough year this year. I’ve been struggling with my depression for a long time and it was just very much a struggle to do anything this year.

I had planned to post more often and had even started some posts back in March but never finished writing it and therefore never posted it. Back in March we lost the oldest cat we had. She was 18 years old and for the entirety of her life she had never been able to speak (there was a problem with her vocal chords) but she was a very loving cat and you could always tell when she wanted attention or stuff. It was sad that she passed and I still miss her.

Over the last few months I’ve had some stress. Back in June it was announced to us that my work was going to be ending coming January 2020 though at the time of the announcement it was told to us that it would be ending in February. We only just recently found out the exact last day of work at our company and it’s literally the day after my 28th birthday so I’m pretty stressed about losing my job because I’ve worked there for 8 years now and it’s been a big aspect of my life. I’m going to miss the friends I’ve made there but I guess it’s time to move on to a new job and a new chapter in my life.

Since my job is moving to another city (and it’s pointless to move with it) I will have to look for a new one. I haven’t got any idea what I want to do once I’m out of work, other than to go on unemployment until I can find a new job or go to college. I’m thinking of going to school since I’ve been planning to for awhile now but could never find the time to do so as well as just procrastinating on what to do as a career. Anyways this year has been a pretty hectic one, let’s just hope that 2020 is better and that I get my butt in gear. 

[the-pen-in-hand]

February 23, 2019

Well it’s been quite some time since I last wrote anything. I haven’t really been in the mood to write anything at all. I haven’t even been working on my planner stuff, which is saying a lot since I enjoy it most of the time. I think that I’m going through a rough patch. I think it could be caused by not working a lot and just generally not having any motivation at all.

Anyways, there isn’t too much I’ve been doing these last few weeks. I’ve worked on some artwork and I’ve bought some art supplies for a project that I’ve been wanting to do for awhile. I still haven’t really started working on it though. I’ve been planning it out for quite some time but just not sure where to start with it. Hopefully I get it started soon. Anyway, I’m gonna go start getting ready for work tonight.

[the-pen-in-hand]

January 16, 2019

  It seems that I have a bit of a problem with continuing to update this blog. I haven’t exactly been busy so I had time to do it but I just haven’t really been motivated to write anything. I haven’t really been wanting to do much of anything either.

  Though I haven’t really been busy at all, I have however been spending time thinking about things. Also I’ve been playing a lot of the Sims 4 while watching YouTube. I haven’t really been doing any artwork lately but that’s okay. I also haven’t really been working either. That’s just how things are in January at my job though. It does give me time to work on other things but I just haven’t been motivated to do them. 

  Hopefully I can get motivated to do things soon. I have so many ideas of what I’d like to do but without any motivation to do them I won’t get anywhere. I have managed to some crafting things though. I printed out some stickers of pictures I took over the summer and put two pages together in my bullet journal (which has been sitting dormant since July) of some of them. Though it’s not much I’ve enjoyed doing it. I still have to write stuff to put with it but I’ll do it later.

[the-pen-in-hand]

January 9, 2019

  Well it’s been quite a long time since I wrote anything. I had a pretty good year for 2018, of course there were some sad times (like when my uncle suddenly passed away) but overall I think it was a pretty good year. I don’t know what this year has in store for me but since it’s still only the beginning of the year I have lots of time to figure out what will happen.

  I’m looking forward to the end of this month as usual. I’ll be 27 this year and I can’t believe how time seems to be just flying by. For my birthday I’m going to be going to a concert so I’m excited about that. I don’t really think I’ll be having a party or anything like that, just go to the concert and maybe have a little get together with some friends (maybe just my roommates and sister) but there’s still time before then.

  I’ve made myself a list of things that I want to get done before 2020. I still don’t know how many of those I’ll be able to complete over the course of this year but it’s worth a shot. I still need to get my driver’s licence and a passport so those are on the list. I also think that I need a new job or at least a second one. I’ve probably been saying that for years but hopefully with help I can do it this time. It might help to redo my resume cause it’s old and bad. 

  Some of my plans for this year are to work on more artwork. I really want to try selling at a convention too but I’m still unsure if I will or not. It would help if I knew how to do it but I don’t and the convention that I enjoy going to has decided to change location this year so it’s making me nervous to attend. I’m likely going to attend it (hopefully) but you never know. Anyways, I’m looking forward to this year.

[the-pen-in-hand]

August 18, 2018

Well since my post got eaten last time I tried to post an update, I should probably try again now. In that post I wrote about what had happened since my last post in June. I celebrated my sister’s birthday and went to a convention with her. I spent a lot of money at the convention but that’s okay because I got lots of artwork and even talked to one of the people selling at the convention to find out how much it would cost to rent a table there. I’m thinking that I might try to sell at a convention next year but I’m not sure yet.

In July I spent a lot of time with my sister and just had a hard time with my anxiety and depression. I just didn’t feel like doing much of anything. I did do some drawing however but then I misplaced my sketchbook and have yet to find it even now. At the end of July my uncle passed away suddenly. It made me really sad. Even though I hadn’t seen him in about 4 years or so, it was saddening to hear that he’d died. Since he died at the end of July I spent the next few weeks preparing for the funeral, attending the funeral services and going to work. I also got my nails done for the first time too.

So far August has been slightly busy. I’ve attended the funeral for my uncle at the beginning of the month, got my nails done with my sister, and have been spending more time with my sister and cousin. Also I’ve got my vacation coming up next week. I’m really looking forward to it. I’ll be going to my roommate’s sister’s cottage for a few days and I’m hoping to go to the exhibition again this year. Before I go I have to find my bathing suit though and if I can’t find it (or it doesn’t fit) I’ll have to get a new one. Hopefully I’ll have a good vacation.

[the-pen-in-hand]

August 13, 2018

Well it’s been quite a long time since I last wrote. I did just type up a huge post and was at the end of it when Tumblr decided to be stupid and eat it. I can’t even be bothered to rewrite everything because im just frustrated with it. I’m just so upset with things right now so I’m just going to wait for another day to write about things.