the-one-who-burned

[the-one-who-burned]

It feels as if ive lost someone I never had.

Moments that possibly were but I couldn’t see at the time. What thoughts were going through your mind when you said these? Are they still prevalent have I waited so long everything has become stale. Is there no hope for me to return, to redo, to have whatever it was back!!!

Must I move forward keeping these memories that pull pain from my soul? Acceptance? Accept what that my cowardice probably cost me a future I hadn’t believed was even possible? Accept that I continued to make excuses of “it means nothing” or “dont read to much into xir behavior afterall theres so many others who their light would shine better on” and my personal favorite “its not special everyone gets this treatment”.

Oh gods above I am forever my greatest enemy what was so different this time that we stayed quiet until the words have dried up and the feelings have been reduced to mere sparks only growing in strength periodically.

I would like to stay in the flames of these feelings continuously living and burning anew returning to the comforting state of ashes.

[the-one-who-burned]

The embers had gone cold, the fires no longer burned, the light disappeared and the moth had begun to fly away. However it wouldn’t be allowed to so easily escape the flames. The moth is once again being called back to those glowing rays wanting nothing more to be embraced by the burning heat almost comforting in the familiar pain.

I’ve returned to the ashes.

[the-one-who-burned]

I have returned once again however this time I would like to ask for opinions from those who cross this post.

For context I am currently dealing with a unrequited obsession I say it’s unrequited but the recipient is most likely unaware of my emotions.

My thought is to make them aware of these feelings not in a hope of reciprocation no just to let it be known as I am not the kind of person who keeps such things secret from the one they are for at least not for long.

Do you the reader believe this to be a good idea? Please either comment, repost, or send an ask with your answers thank you kindly.

[the-one-who-burned]

Tis odd to think about but I fear my feelings may have finally settled? It brings me both joy and sadness to know I’ve reached a point where it seemed so hopeless I’ve all but given up. Alas I am unsure when I’ll post here again but thank you to those who have enjoyed the pieces made from my burning./gen

[the-one-who-burned]

Considering deleting this blog as I’m reaching a state where I want these feelings gone.

[the-one-who-burned]

How do I free myself? What must I do to remove the thorns you have wrapped around my very soul. I’m so utterly exhausted from these feelings it seems like every day I am in a pain far greater than words can describe. I’m coming to terms on how hopeless these thoughts and wishes are. Is there anyone who can save me from this?

[the-one-who-burned]

Hello again, how have you been?

Selfish... why would it be selfish? Sorry, I tried to look for the older posts but found nothing about it, aside for one that talked about loving someone so much that you wish they were happy, even if not with you... a sad thing to happen, indeed

About the servers, please do share! The ones I entered ended up being some kind of RPG servers... not what I wanted 🤡

And about a name... what about you call me J ? Sounds good?

Apologies for the late reply I am well and you?

It is hard to put into words why I see these feelings as selfish. Pardon the abrupt topic change I just wanted to clarify I was talking about the tags in my previous posts specifically “yanblr” “irl yan” “yandere irl” those should lead you to other yandere blogs.

As for the server I’ll link it below I’m unsure of your age so it’s going to be one for minors and adults but if you are 18+ I have about 2 other ones you could join.

Greetings and welcome back I do hope you have been well.

Thank you for the visit J and I look forward to hearing from you again.

[the-one-who-burned]

Heya, it's me again!

Yes, I was talking about the way someone can love so much, I find this quite endearing, to know someone could feel this much for just... a normal human being.

And at the same time that I want to find someone like-minded, I am really shy, and don't talk too much with others... Plus, I live in quite a small city, I don't think people here are very open-minded to anything that's slightly different ;-;

Anyway, to summarize all this unnecessary text lol: do you know some group chat or something like this, where I can find people who share this kind of similarities?

(Also, sorry for any grammar error, English is not my first language 😅 and sorry if I said anything that could be offensive or anything, I'm kind of new to this yandere world)

Greetings and welcome back I do hope you have been well.

Love you say I’ve posted about that before but this blog and my feelings are entirely selfish in nature thank you though for that comparison although I consider the being this was made for anything but a normal human being/nm.

You could check out yanblr tag or any of the ones tagged in my previous posts. There’s also discord if you have it I know of a few yandere servers if you’d like those to be shared. Please be at ease here I will not judge you on how you type especially as I myself struggle with grammar.

If you plan to be a recurring guest here maybe you can give yourself a name?/nf

[the-one-who-burned]

As someone who would love to be loved like this, to be obsessed and be the obsession of other... How do one can find someone like this?

Do you speak of the way I obsess and love? I don’t believe this is what you yearn for as it’s a path riddled with thorns of feelings unspoken.

In regards to your question I would say find spaces filled with like minded individuals. Yandere’s who wish to offer their everything to someone aren’t as rare as one might think.

I would also like to thank you for visiting this place and sending my first ask please do come back if you wish to my sanctuary will always be open to those who need it.

[the-one-who-burned]

Apologies in advance for this tangent I’ll be going on.

It truly irks me when those who falsely claim to be obsessed or devoted appear before me. They make a mockery of those of us who truly wish to be at the altar of our beloved, to sit at their feet and devote ourselves to them regardless of what we get in return. How dare you spit such blasphemy under the name we share? Love? Devotion? Obsessed? Please don’t make me laugh. What you feel is nothing more than infatuation and desperation that's all you reek of. I pity the poor souls who are subjected to such watered-down, superficial, tasteless “love”. Do not trespass into our hallowed ground and pretend to be one of us.

You are not welcome here.

[the-one-who-burned]

Sometimes I fear my feelings cannot be expressed using the words “devotion” or “love” for I think of them as inadequate my obsessive feelings that is. Those descriptions feel far too tender and selfless how I truly am is anything but, which makes me wonder how you would react to this ruin of a sanctuary my dear.

[the-one-who-burned]

As my understanding of you grows so do the reminders. Songs will have me recalling your voice, poems bring forth the feelings of joy in the memories it invokes, even a simple phrase makes you appear at the forefront of my mind.

[the-one-who-burned]

In my mind it’s wrong for me to harbor these thoughts and feelings about someone who sees me as the opposite and yet every attempt at getting rid of these feelings have failed.

Is it fate or a divine punishment?

[the-one-who-burned]

There’s something inherently beautiful about finding your darling in objects and the like. It shows how much you care about them or rather the evidence you are learning what they embody.

Your affection is shown so clearly in such details.

[the-one-who-burned]

Every day it seems as though I am closer and closer to that final heartbreak. Yet I still cannot stop the flow of emotions that I have for you. Do you notice? My cries, my tears, my voice as I plead for you? I’d hope not.

[the-one-who-burned]

There was a time where I couldn’t understand those who loved but couldn’t be loved in return. Now I feel their pain it’s a truly special kind of pain; one in which you want the one you love to be loved even if it’s not you who they love as well.

[the-one-who-burned]

I’m cursed to be in your life but only on the outskirts.

Able to feel your warmth but not directly,

I must only watch as those you adore bask in the glory that is your light.

Wishing there will be a time when I can directly experience it,

However cursed with the knowledge that I never will.

You truly are my salvation and ruin.