tendercoredyke

[tendercoredyke]

h/t @ nocontextvp on twitter

[tendercoredyke]

[tendercoredyke]

ALICENT HIGHTOWER and RHAENYRA TARGARYEN HOUSE OF THE DRAGON — S2E8: The Queen Who Ever Was

[tendercoredyke]

still thinking about that episode man

[tendercoredyke]

1.02 // 2.04

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alicent after a week of getting kicked out of her own small council to later finding out that rhaenyra is finally in her girl kissing era ten years too late and over 300 miles away

[tendercoredyke]

alicent feels the vibrations of rhaenyra kissing another woman and immediately goes to drown herself in the lake. real lesbian representation right there

[tendercoredyke]

Ah Yes. Me. My wife. And Her 500 foot firebreathing dragon

[tendercoredyke]

[tendercoredyke]

"You know you didn't have to start like a whole fight club just to date me."

[tendercoredyke]

[tendercoredyke]

the fact that marvel PROMOTED maria hill as one of the proganists of secret invasion, made a individual poster of he character, released the first images of the show with her in it, even dropped a marvel's legends episode just for her for in the end FUCKING KILL her character in the first episode of secret invasion and credit the actress in the end as a "special guest" is so fucking foul of them... this is my villain origin story

[tendercoredyke]

"at least natalie's death was narratively satisfyin—"

no. it wasn't. they gave us a character who has struggled with addiction her whole life. struggled with self-harm in a variety of forms. who has felt lost and guilty for the last twenty-five years. a character who has been suicidal multiple times in the past, a character who was literally suicidal a week ago.

and you killed her a day after she started to actually, truly try to heal.

yes, this show has always been dark. yes, from the first moment of the entire series we knew these girls committed unspeakable violence on one another, and did so ritually. yes, we knew that the adult versions of these characters spent the last twenty-five years struggling with their guilt and shame and trauma, and were doing it very, very poorly.

all of this just shows that the story has been in their struggle. this has been—or at least it was initially sold as—a show about women and their trauma. a show about women who don’t know how to examine their trauma, don’t know how to process it. who can’t take more than small glances at what happened, but who can also never, ever forget that it’s there. this has been a show about women who are coping, most times poorly, but very, very realistically.

and there was so much hope in that, despite (or because) this is such a dark show. these women can screw up and struggle and be real people—which women never get to be on television—and still maybe, they can heal bit by bit. there was always an inherent hope in this story, because they were all still, as adults, trying to make a life for themselves even if they were muddling through it.

in season two, natalie starts to heal at the retreat. (apparently—i personally found her 180 between "qui" and "burial" highly suspect and very poorly executed, but that's a moot point now.) she spends most of the season struggling against lottie, but finally accepts lottie's therapy (thanks to lisa) and beginning with "burial" she keeps trying to get the girls to talk about what happened. she figures out what she needs to move forward—to finally, truly address what happened in the wilderness by talking about it. that becomes her goal, and her focus with the others.

but natalie doesn't get to talk about anything. the girls want to drink instead of talk in "burial". and in "it chooses," the second nat suggests they talk, lottie shuts her down and suggests they drink poison instead. natalie is sober, and trying to do what she thinks she is supposed to do by confronting her trauma. she has made all of the "right" choices to actually heal from her pain, but she never gets to.

natalie’s entire story line, set up in her very introduction in the pilot, is to find her purpose. she talks about her self-destructive behaviors being due to her lack of one, and makes it clear that she intends to find that purpose once she leaves therapy. thus, for natalie’s story to be narratively satisfying, her story needs to end with her finding that purpose, right? which means that, if we are to treat this as a narratively satisfying ending, then natalie physically sacrificing her life for lisa is supposed to be that purpose. 

but death is not a purpose. and, to portray it as such for a character who has tried to commit suicide is, honestly, disgusting to me. especially for a character who was saved—again, a week ago—from her attempt by the very woman who then encourages her to drink poison that is used to "put animals out of their misery". who is then told in her death vision to “let the wilderness in” (when "the wilderness" has been a pretty clear metaphor for trauma!!!). they spent all season telling a suicidal character to suddenly let go and give in and stop resisting in a narrative that leads to her “””finding purpose””” in her fucking death. not to mention letting that death be recorded as "an overdose" after she has been explicitly sober as part of her growth!!

a far, far more narratively satisfying path for natalie is for her to actually find a purpose that is consistent with the hunter-protector she’s always been described as. in “no compass” tai says that natalie is the reason they all made it out of the wilderness. (again, wilderness as a metaphor for trauma!) so why, on earth would the better story line, the more consistent story line, the more satisfying story line—especially when this show is all about parallels and cycles repeating—not be natalie leading them all out of “the wilderness” by helping them process the trauma? by getting them all to talk about it?

(i didn’t necessarily need or expect yellowjackets to give a truly “good” message or resolution—bittersweet would be plenty for me—but can you imagine the beauty of that story? the character who has felt nothing but pain and guilt, who has been alone for the majority of her life, who has never felt good and stable love, being the one to break through the trauma first? the one who finally learns to heal first, and protects them all once again by leading them through the wilderness? a story of a woman supporting women through trauma that only they can understand?)

instead natalie's story goes from struggling with her pain and guilt, to trying to find some purpose in her life, to losing that purpose and attempting suicide, to being saved and actually starting to address her trauma head-on. and then dying before she can. i'm sure there are some people who believe that this is character growth (the briefest moment of addressing her trauma), but it wasn't; her growth is blunted by her death.

and this makes her death both tragic and unsatisfying. a character who struggles so hard and so long, who finally, finally sees a light, and the moment she reaches for it, is shifted back to where she was a week ago, having never gotten to actually grow.

so no, just because i am personally devastated by nat's death does not mean that i am blind to the narrative; quite the opposite. i am furious both as a fan of the character and a fan of the story. i feel deceived, disappointed, and insulted by every single part of this story. i feel like we were all cheated out of what could have been a beautiful exploration of a complex and fascinating character. and on top of all that i am very, very hurt.

[tendercoredyke]

Girls when they remember that Travis was Nat’s best friend and Jackie was Shauna’s best friend and Laura Lee was Lottie’s best friend and Van was Tai’s best friend and Crystal was Misty’s best friend and then laura lee died and jackie died and then crystal died and then travis died and van and tai stopped speaking for decades and when they reunite van is dying . girls when they remember that. GIRLS WHEN. girls when …….. girls when shauna and taissa stayed best friends through it all and misty and nat became best friends and van and lottie are still basically alone and when they get a jolt again of what it is to be with their friends again they are so happy they are so fucking happy. GIRLS WHEN!!!!!!!! Girls when. Girls .

[tendercoredyke]

pouring one out for jackie taylor tonight. these first two seasons, it has been her that moved the story along. they would have never made it to nationals or gotten on that plane without her scoring that goal in s1, her death started the cannibalism in s2. hard to see how that trend can continue in s3 now that she’s super mega dead. she’ll continue to haunt the narrative, but we’re officially at the end of a girlfail era 😔✊

[tendercoredyke]

[tendercoredyke]

STAY AWAKE WITH ME.

“I promise.”