#zinfandel tasting

[rabbitcruiser]

Zinfandel Day

Zinfandel Day is celebrated on November 17 every year, and we’re going to show you how you can indulge in the excitement. Zinfandel is a type of black-skinned grape that is typically used for making wines. The grapes are known for their high sugar content, which is useful for making wines with an alcohol percentage of more than 15%. The Zinfandel, also known as Primitivo, grows best in a warm but not too hot climate. Its taste varies, depending on the ripeness of the grapes. Zinfandel Day was created in the United Kingdom to give recognition to this exquisite variety of grapes.

History of Zinfandel Day

It is said that the Zinfandel grapes were discovered in the Mediterranean region around 6000 B.C. Shortly after that period, winemaking became prevalent. Zinfandel was found in parts of Croatia, but a lot of the plantation was wiped out by the phylloxera epidemic. The Zinfandel’s genetic structure closely resembles that of Primitivo, which was found in Italy in the 1800s. It was first recognized by the European Union that Primitivo would be a synonym for Zinfandel in 1990. Today both Zinfandel and Primitivo are used interchangeably.

In 1930, Zinfandel agriculture was affected greatly, first by the Great Depression and then by the Prohibition that followed. By the 1960s, Zinfandel was already being referred to as the “lost vine and wine.” In 2002, the Crljenak Kaštelanski variety was discovered in Croatia, and winemakers started mixing Zinfandel and Crljenak Kaštelanski. Soon after, the wine production again rose to prominence. The wines were made mostly in parts of Puglia or Lodi (Croatia).

The Zinfandel Advocates and Producers were formed in the United States for “the preservation, education, and appreciation” of the Zinfandel grapes. Zinfandel Day was created to show love and appreciation toward the Zinfandel grape and the wines produced from it, namely Rombauer, Artezin, Pedroncelli, and Robert Biale. Wine lovers also held Zinfandel tasting days in San Francisco. Zinfandel Day quickly spread to Europe, especially the United Kingdom. It became a day of celebrating one of the world’s most favorite vines and wines.

Zinfandel Day timeline

6000 B.C. Zinfandel Grapes are Discovered

Zinfandel grapes are discovered in the Mediterranean region.

1880 Primitivo is Born

Primitivo, a close relative of the Zinfandel grapes, is found in Italy.

1930 Zinfandel is Almost Extinct

Zinfandel production suffers greatly because of the Great Depression and Prohibition.

1990s Zinfandel Day

Zinfandel Day is created by the Zinfandel Advocates and Producers (ZAP), to honor Zinfandel grapes and the wines made from them.

Zinfandel Day FAQs

How many wine days are celebrated?

There are about 17 national wine day celebrations — from simple wine-drinking days to more specific wine celebrations such as Mulled Wine Day, Zinfandel Day, and Sauvignon Blanc Day.

What does Zinfandel wine taste like?

The taste of the Zinfandel wines depends on the ripeness of the grapes. It might be sweet, semi-sweet, or dry.

What is the difference between Merlot and Zinfandel?

Merlot adds a plummy flavor to the wine. Zinfandel has a rich blackberry/raspberry or pepper flavor and is less bitter compared with the Merlot.

Zinfandel Day Activities

Drink Zinfandel wines

Share it on social media

Read more about Zinfandel grape history

What better way to celebrate Zinfandel Day than to taste some exotic Zinfandel wines? Pour yourself a glass of Zinfandel wines such as Rombauer or Artezin and enjoy the juicy, sweet taste of Zinfandel grapes. Enjoy your drink with friends and family.

Let everyone know that you're celebrating this day. Take pictures of you enjoying some Zinfandel wine with friends and share them on social media. You can also write articles on the origins of Zinfandel grapes and post them online.

Use this day to improve your knowledge. Read more about the historical origins of the Zinfandel grapes — how they were discovered, and how they became one of the most loved grape varieties among wine lovers.

5 Facts About Zinfandel That Will Blow Your Mind

It is used in cranberry sauce

It is a heritage grape

It has wings

White Zin was created in 1972

Austria brought Zinfandel to the U.S.

Zinfandel grapes are sometimes used to give the cranberry sauce a spicy flavor.

The Zinfandel grape is considered by the people of California to be their heritage grape.

The Zinfandel grapevine always has a side branch growing outwards that gives an appearance of a wing.

White Zin was created by the Sutter Home in 1972.

It is said that the Zinfandel was brought to the U.S. by Croatia, under Austrian rule.

Why We Love Zinfandel Day

We appreciate Zinfandel grapes and wines

It gives us an occasion to come together as a family

We improve our knowledge

Zinfandel grapes are some of the most popular grape varieties on the planet. Yet, we feel as though they do not get the recognition they deserve. Zinfandel allows us to appreciate this magnificent variety of grapes and the tasty, high-quality wines produced from them.

This day is to be celebrated with friends and family. Zinfandel Day gives us the chance to invite neighbors or family members over for a few glasses of Zinfandel wines, and a chance to bond with each other.

This is also a day of learning. This day allows us to learn more about the origins of Zinfandel grapes and wines. We learn about how the zinfandel grape almost went to extinction but survived and became one of the most popular red wine grapes on the planet.

Source

[californiaquail]

now i remember. wine tastes bad

[scottharveywines]

Join us for Sutter Creek Locals’ Night. Come relax and have a drink with us! Wine by the glass, great “Locals Only” discounts, and good old Sutter Creek neighborly bacchanalia.

[winemastery]

Chronic Cellars Zinfandel Wine Review (Episode 394)

[aziraphales-library]

HI THERE! You do such amazing work, thank you so much!

I was just wondering if there were any chef aus out there? Any tags/rating! Thanks!

Hello, here are some chef fics...

Sometimes it's cosmic, sometimes it's cocktail weiners by myladyclegane (M)

All executive chef Anthony J Crowley wanted was a cider and some time with the girls(of the Golden variety) after his double shift, what he gets is playing savior when his best friend and next door neighbor (and desperate crush) has to unexpectedly host a last minute game night for his awful co-workers.

As Sweet As This by vantablck (G)

One moment, Crowley had a high position at a top Michelin rated restaurant. The next, her career was taking a metaphorical million light-year dive into a lake of boiling sulfur and she was moving back into her small childhood town. Cue Aziraphale, the childhood best friend she’s been pining over since time immemorial. Cue Crowley’s oh so brilliant idea of co-owning a restaurant with her.

Hell's kitchen, heaven's chef by Sani86 (T)

Crowley is a high-strung chef - one of London's best - but his boss Beez is fed up with his tricks. So they hire a mild-mannered blonde chef to keep him in line. Crowley hates the guy. Except that he doesn't, not even a little. --- Human AU, in which they are chefs and idiots.

Trivia Night: A Love Story by MissUnderstoodLyrics (E)

No angst, all fluff and fluffy smut! Crowley just moved to the States and has already been roped into the pub trivia competition for all of the King Street businesses, which they take very seriously. He just wants to work and go home to his cat and his plants, but the promise of free drinks lures him to the first game, where he meets a gorgeous, witty, mischievous angel, and suddenly trivia night doesn't seem quite so bad. A Good Omens Human AU

Recipe For Romance by ranguvar82 (M)

Anthony Crowley would love nothing more than to enjoy a good meal once in a while. Unfortunately, when you're an agoraphobic with severe food allergies, your choices are limited to private chefs. Too bad Crowley's fired every single one. Enter Aziraphale Fell, known for being able to create gourmet meals for even the most discerning palate. Crowley's expecting him to be like every other chef. He's not expecting an angel that will turn his world upside down. Aziraphale has a recipe for everything. Even, maybe, for romance.

Till I Saw You by curiouswriterkr (E)

Crowley is a burned out chef recovering from adrenal fatigue in Tadfield. Aziraphale, a gifted musician with a big, soft heart, happens to be performing one evening at an open mic. Their eyes collide and inevitably, so do their lives, helping each other step into healing, truth and more joy.

Style and Substance by Cabernet_Woebegone (E)

“But y’know, if my boss finds out I’m helping you even a little, they’re gonna throw me out on my ass.” “Yes, I understand it is a bit of a conflict of interest for you… Is there something I can offer you in return? Something you would like?” Aziraphale questioned hopefully. You, Crowley thought loudly as he took a second sip. I want to know if you moan when you kiss the same way you do when you try something delicious. I want to know if your lips taste like Zinfandel. “Yes, actually.” Aziraphale is having difficulty running his restaurant, and it isn't helping that he believes the place across the street is trying to sabotage him. To his surprise, chef Crowley comes to him on friendly terms. Together they come up with an arrangement that could benefit them both. (Explicit rating for chapters 10 , 14 & 17, see tags for description. Please do not record this as a podfic or repost this fic anywhere! Thank you!)

- Mod D

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing Notes: Wine-Tasting

for your wine-tasting scenes

Enhance your wine-tasting experience and better identify different wines with these tips:

Cleanse your palate between sips. When tasting for flavors of the wine, you must cleanse your palate by using a spittoon and drinking water. “I regularly cleanse my palate with water. I like to use high-pH water, eight or above . . . . I find that alkaline solution of water cleanses my palate much better and reduces the acid in many wines,” James Suckling, a wine critic, says. “I also might have some bread, or olives are great with red wine. You want things that refresh your palate.” Cleansing your palate helps your taste buds enjoy more subtle flavors.

Do a blind tasting. “When I was starting as a taster in the ’80s, when I studied to be a master of wine, I was always blind tasting,” James says. Tasting blind means not knowing the kind of wine you are tasting—be it a zinfandel, rosé, pinot grigio, or syrah—so that will not influence your tasting. Moreover, tasting blind means not looking at the label; sometimes, a label plays up the fruit flavors or connotes an older wine, which can impact your interpretation of the varietal while tasting.

Get the wines to the right temperature to rate. Temperature is critical for wine tasting. “I think it’s important for whites to be between fourteen and sixteen degrees centigrade—not too cold but cold enough to be fresh. If it’s too cold, I’m not going to be able to discern the aromas, taste, and texture,” James says. “The reds I also like a little bit cooler than normal. A lot of people serve their reds at twenty-two or room temperature. I like them around nineteen or twenty.” Using wine glasses with a stem is essential, so you can adequately hold the glass without warming the wine.

Pay attention to scent. Articulating scent is an essential tasting skill. In trying one wine during a blind tasting, James notes “some warmth. Aromas of lemon curd, maybe some fresh basil. And I get a sensation of ash. Like, ash from volcanoes; there’s a number of white wines made in Italy that are coming from volcanic soils such as Etna in Sicily, Campania near Naples, and Soave near Verona.” Quality wines give you primary and secondary aromas, sometimes even tertiary ones. Breathe in your wine with your lips slightly parted to anticipate a wine’s flavor and notes. Take a small sip of wine and see if you sense wooden notes from oak barrels, high acid from citrus fruits, or sweetness from red fruits or tropical fruits.

Swirl your glass of wine. Getting your wine to move around enlivens its scent. “When you’re tasting, it’s really important to swirl the wine to get some air in there to bring out the wine aromas,” James says. “Also, it’s important not to have too much wine in the glass. I like to have about thirty or fifty milliliters in the glass. Then you can really give it a good swirl.” After swirling, note the viscosity and the tannins, the sediment along the bottom or sides of the glass. Use a new wine glass for each new bottle of wine in a blind tasting.

Taste in a clear space. Sometimes, you might taste wine in the cool climate of winemakers’ cellars or a busy room full of people as part of a wine club. To concentrate on the wine’s color and qualities, try to taste the wine in a well-lit, not-too-noisy tasting room. Light is essential when applying the [wine point] scale to red, orange, or white wines. “It’s important that the environment’s clean [and] well-lit,” James says. “I can concentrate on the wines. Sometimes that’s not possible if I’m in a cellar, traveling at dinner, or in a restaurant. But ideally, when I’m tasting, especially blind, it’s important to have a place where I can concentrate.”

Use the wine point system. Following the 100-point wine system can help you determine a good wine. The 100-point system is a rating scale for wine quality. Wine scores go up to 100 points, with 100 points going to the best wines. Whether you’re trying a dessert wine or a dry wine, this scoring system helps you better break down and comprehend the quality of a wine. “I think it’s an easy way to communicate about wine,” James says. “It's an easy way for you to understand quality.”

Source ⚜ Writing Notes & References

[naturallyteal]

Good Omens fic recommendation my “best of September”:

Find the Light by @klikandtuna

“Find the light

But the light finds you

The shadows slide off, no dusk, no dew

Can mar the glory of what you’ve become

Preserved in amber, born anew

From pondwater

Pondwater”

(quote from the song lyrics in this fanfic)

(My fanart for this fanfic based on the painting “Bachschleuse” by Johann Wilhelm Schirmer, 1827-28, Kunstpalast Düsseldorf, Germany. It’s very symbolic. 😎)

In the ever flooding ocean of stories, there are some that stand out, that I think about days or weeks later, that touch me more than others. Once a month, I make a post about one of those:

This story takes the reader on a journey of hurt and comfort, trauma and healing, fear and courage. Instead of the summary, I’d like to quote the beginning, that told me right from the start that this was going to make a rewarding read:

~

He stood at the window, full in the afternoon sunshine that angled in between the curtains—velvet, once the color of a fine Zinfandel but now somewhat faded on the outer side, with a few trailing threads at the hem that brushed over the floorboards. Every year, Michael would suggest replacing them; every year, he would pretend to consider it. But he loved those worn old curtains. He reached out as he stood there, closing a fold of the fabric between two fingers to feel the warmth that the sun had infused there, the soft prickle as the tiny strands shifted.

The intercom chimed. A pleasant sound—a low, musical chirp. (They had cycled through seven different machines before finding one whose alert had pleased him.)

“Sir, Adam Young to see you.”

~

In 15 chapters and ~ 97 k words, this e-rated Human AU with teacher Aziraphale and rock star Crowley is a story that captured me, that made me think, that is still with me weeks later. It’s so well written that it, again, makes me regret a lot of those “real books” by “professional authors” I bought and read in the years before I found the AO3, a lot of which did not come up to this high quality. There’s music in here, a poetic song, metaphors that really spoke to me, and flashbacks that were expertly handled and used to tell the story the best way possible. There’s also fanart! Needless to say, the characters are relatable and loveable.

One word regarding the e-rating, as this is something many people either love or hate: the scenes regarding sex in this are rather rare, can not be called smut at all, are very tasteful, some are more described symbolically than explicitly, and still manage to be highly erotic.

👍

GO read!

Tagging List under the cut

Let me know if you want on it for future posts of mine!

Let me know if you want off the list:

@echogracebeloved @oxribs @copperplatebeech @thescholarlystrumpet @simonezitrone79

@siriosa @captainblou @alphacentaurinebula @ineffablefool @ashfae

@fellshish @vidavalor @thindarkdukewrites @crowleys-bright-red-hair-streak @kimberleyjean

@dragonfire42 @lickthecowhappy @ineffablenlghtingales @turquoisedata @di-42

@dierama-mojo

[azaleakoneko]

Birthday Sex

Roronoa Zoro x Fem|Reader

A/N: This is a belated birthday gift for @soleilnomoon! Thank you for being so patient while I finished Soft(ish) Zoro for you (and all the other birthday y/n’s heh) :3

Warnings: Semi public & Unprotected sex, Slight swearing, nothing too serious. Use of petnames, dirty talk, creampie, mention of overstim, ass slapping. Just a lot of fluff & some possessiveness of the birthday girl 😌

Words count: 6.3k

“Look y/n,” Zoro said as he scratched the back of his head, calloused fingers dragging through the green tufts of hair at the base of his neck as he looked at you with a flustered expression. “We both know I’m not the best when it comes to this romance crap, but since it’s your birthday I had the shitty cook help me set up a little dinner for us.”

Just the thought of the low-key pleading he had to do for the man to help him made him cringe a little, but knowing that you would be happy was enough of a reward to put up with the shit talking for an evening. Zoro was useless in the kitchen so he knew that he wouldn’t have had a choice otherwise unless he wanted you to be eating burnt or undercooked food with liquor to choke it down with. It wasn’t for lack of trying on his part; his attempts at cooking something edible is what convinced him he needed help in the first place.

Nonetheless here you were, looking as mouth wateringly beautiful as you always did with a smile that made his breath hitch in his throat as he pulled out your chair for you, and any irritation he had dissipated into nothingness—replaced by a desire to make sure your night was everything you could wish for in a date night despite his awkwardness.

There were topped off wine glasses with a tasteful fruity Zinfandel already sitting on the table along with a beautiful layout of candles that illuminated the assortment of steaming plates sitting on the table. It all looked pretty good if Zoro said so himself, but he was simple and would usually be happy just kicking back on the deck with a bottle of sake and forgoing a fancy dinner scene altogether, so his opinion wasn’t really the one that mattered tonight. This was a celebration after all and he would go all out for y/n.

“Go ahead and take a seat. Everything for the rest of the night has already been taken care of, so all you have to do is sit back and relax.” He said as he waited for you to sit down before pushing your chair in and walking around to sit in the seat across from you. “You look so damn gorgeous tonight, birthday girl. I love it when I can see all of those beautiful curves of yours. A nice little preview for tonight.”

It made you laugh when he couldn’t help himself from dragging his eyes over what he could see of you in that seated position, but the way his eyes glazed over with lust it was almost as if you were already nude. “Aw, this is so thoughtful of you, Zoro.. You really went all out for me tonight didn’t you? Thank you baby.” You said as you reached over and grabbed your glass, raising it and carefully tilting it towards him so that you could toast to the evening.

Zoro grabbed his glass, which looked much smaller in his big strong hands which you loved to touch and feel than it did in yours, and much to your surprise gently clinked his own glass against yours. “To you Y/N, on probably my second favorite day to celebrate with you beside the day I got to make you mine,” he began with a gruff tone as he clearly began to get a little emotional. “You’re my best friend. I’m glad you put up with all of my bullshit.. So tonight is all about me spoiling you, and I don’t wanna hear you whining even once if it isn't from me causing it, alright?”

“You’re making me blush being so sweet to me,” you said with another amused laugh, your heart feeling light from what was already the beginning of an amazing evening with your favorite person, as he tried to make even his softness have an edge. He was just like the blades he loved so much and took good care of, and he always took care of you too. Sure it wasn’t in the most conventional ways all the time, but he loved you, and that was enough for you. “How could I ever whine about being spoiled..?”

Zoro playfully glared at you with a knowing look. “You’re joking, right? Sometimes I feel like you whine just because you like it when I put you back in your place.” He took a drink of his wine, looking damn good as his adams apple bobbed from swallowing the crimson fluid, and you were already wishing he was between your plush thighs drinking your fluids. “Don’t you, princess? You can admit it, y'know.”

You softly clenched the fist that lay in your lap and returned the glare, knowing he was doing this on purpose. You knew that he knew very well what the answer to that question was and that he just wanted to see you squirm a little. He always liked when he managed to get you so frustrated that you practically ripped his clothes off upon finally being alone, and he took pride every single time in watching you crumble. “Hmp! I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Still, you denied and played right into his hands again.

“Okay, you can play it however you want, but by the end of the night the birthday girl will tell the truth.” Zoro said with a smirk, setting his drink down on the table as he held eye contact with his ‘good’ eye. That sly look of his always caused a twinge in your stomach that ran all the way down to your pretty clit, and your thighs were quick to join your clenched hand in an attempt to quell the ache and keep up the facade at least through your nice dinner with him. “It’s really up to you, but I know you tend to prefer things the hard way. That’s fine, I can do that too.”

You piled your plate up with a mix of the delicious spread; taking some smoked unagi sushi, pomegranate skirt steak with whipped feta and roasted tomatoes with a side of naan bread, and a side of a complimentary fruity salad with chunks of watermelon, cocoa nibs, feta and a variety of other ingredients that made your mouth water with an almost caramel honey dressing, before stabbing each piece a little more aggressively than you needed to and ripping through the courses one by one while he watched. You didn’t want to lift your gaze back up and see him staring at you with a sly knowing expression, but you also didn’t want to eat in silence.

“So um,” you began as you dabbed the corner of your mouth with the napkin that had previously been elaborated folded to hold the rest of the silverware you currently weren’t using. “-what exactly did you have to say to get Sanji to help you out tonight anyway?” At least this way it somewhat flipped the attention onto him for a moment and gave you a chance to even the score. You knew the two weren’t exactly the best of friends, so this had to be good.

Zoro immediately stiffened and his face soured, lips pressing into a firm unamused line. His hands that held a knife and fork that he was using to cut into a medium rare monstrous slab of high quality steak stopped cutting for a moment, and you knew that was the last thing he wanted to talk about. “That’s not important so don’t worry about it. Anyway, it’s your birthday. Why do you wanna talk about what that creep wanted anyways? Unless you’ve already had your fill and want to move on to the next event?”

“Heh heh, fine! Alright, keep your secrets.” You said, letting him evade the question since you had already gotten the intended reaction. Despite knowing it would have repercussions in the near future, it was always worth it to watch him get a little annoyed; that just meant you’d be great friends with the mattress. You finished the wine in your glass and reached for the bottle to top it off once more. “I’ll be good, I promise. I only wanna think about you, baby.”

“Mhm, sure you will..” Zoro said as he listened while you made another promise that he knew you weren’t going to keep; not that he was going to complain about it. You couldn’t help it, just like he wouldn’t be able to help the rough thrusts and stinging slaps across your ass later. He relaxed his shoulders again, continuing to eat his meal. “Let’s just finish our food, drink a little more, and celebrate. The night is still young and I’m not nearly done with you yet, love.”

The two of you did just that — finishing your meals without another hitch, besides Sanji popping in to sing you happy birthday with dramatic heart eyes and promptly getting chased off after, before Zoro escorted you to the next part of the date he planned. This time he placed a blindfold over your eyes, not letting you see your destination until you had arrived. After a few wrong turns and minor frustration from Zoro about being lost, everything worked out fine.

You couldn't help but gasp in wonder when Zoro finally took the blindfold off of you and you could open your eyes to see what he had set up for you. He had taken you out of the city and away from all of the bustling noise and now before you was a large blanket with pillows spread out on top of a soft grassy hill among wild grown flowers that had the perfect view of the star painted night sky. There was even an ice bucket nestled into the grass beside the blanket that had a bottle of crisp champagne with two glasses just waiting to be filled. Finally the area was illuminated with two gas lanterns and an extra blanket off to the side, just in case you got cold.

“Zorooo…! Oh my god, this is so beautiful!” You practically blubbered as he led you towards the blanket with one hand on the small of your back affectionately. He let you sit down first and then took a seat beside you, keeping one arm around you and pulling you closer as you melted into his side. “Wow, you really do love me…” It couldn’t be helped as you playfully teased him one more time, but when you leaned your head back against his shoulder to look at him with those sparkling eyes of yours filled with soft adoration he couldn’t help but stare right back at you.

“I do. I know I don’t say it nearly as often as you’d probably like to hear it, but I love you y/n.” Zoro said as he lifted his other hand to caress your face, thumb trailing softly over your bottom lip. Then he leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to your lips, wanting to convey just how much you meant without words. It wasn’t long, nor was it rough like a lot of his kisses, but still it made your heart race like it was your first.

“I love you too.” You uttered tenderly like the lovesick fool you were as soon as his lips parted from yours. “There’s no one else I’d rather have spending my birthday or my life with than you, my love. Thank you for all of this. I know it must have been a lot of setup, so I just want you to know I’m, mph—!” The sentence ended abruptly when Zoro captured your lips again, effectively stopping your words and thought process.

“Shh… You don’t have to thank me. I told you tonight is all about spoiling you, so just let me alright?” He said as he kissed you again, this time deeper as he let his tongue flick out and roll over your pretty wine stained lips, sending a small shiver down your spine. “Lay down with me and look at the stars, yeah?” He suggested before he slipped his warm tongue in your mouth and started to lower you both down onto the comfortable quilted blanket—the pillows being a much welcomed addition for the extra comfort and support that it provided against the dewy ground.

It always effortlessly took your breath away and blew your mind how Zoro made you feel like the only other person in the world, and to him you might as well have been. No one could ever hope to compare to how you made him feel, and you returned the sentiments. Despite all the playful teasing and riling up, the both of you felt like two halves of a whole. You brought a certain sweetness, optimism, and thoughtfulness to his life that he’d never had before and had never wanted before meeting you, and he knew without a doubt that he’d never let you go. Zoro on the other hand, he brought a comfortable sense of stability to your life with his blatant honesty and the consistent way he always showed up when needed.

Right now, all you wanted was to be whole with him.

“Zoro… You make it really hard to care about the stars when you kiss me like this.” Your words were more of a soft whine, and he couldn’t help but chuckle at how easy it was to get you to fold for him, but he would have been lying through his teeth if he were to say he truly cared either. Having you here with him like this, all to himself in a personal bubble, was all the magic and stardust he personally needed.

“Then just lay here and focus on me… better?” He asked rhetorically as his fingers sunk into your hair and brought your lips to his for a third time, not letting you off so easily this time. In what seemed like a fraction of a second he was hovering over you completely, his knee sliding your legs apart, thigh rubbing against your thinly clothed cunt. He took your bottom lip between his teeth and bit down gently as his free hand groped your soft breast over your fancy dress, feeling quite pleased with himself when a breathy heavenly moan left your lips and you bucked your pussy against his thigh in response. “I’ll go ahead and take that as a ‘yes’ then, princess.”

“Shit.. M-More, Please Zoro…? I have been wanting you so bad since dinn—” You had already begun to plead in your lust induced state, but Zoro wasn’t going to bother with wasting time on any of that. His lips pressed more roughly against yours than they had earlier, his tongue passionately melding with yours as both of his hands wandered to your hips to force you to grind harder against his muscular thigh.

“Is this what you wanted, princess?” Zoro asked in a tone that made it clear he knew it very well wasn’t what you had been asking for; he just wanted to hear you say it. Or better yet, to scream what she wanted. “Well? Tell me with your big girl words what you need for me to do for you. More what? Kisses..? Touching? Saying ‘more’ isn’t a lot to go off of you know, heh.”

You ordinarily would’ve grumbled a bit about how much of a dick he was being, but since you’d had glass after glass of wine between the excellent courses of food chosen specifically for their aphrodisiac properties, you were basically putty waiting to be molded by his firm veiny hands. “Zoro, I want you to fuck me so bad right now! Happy? I need you to do whatever you need to do to get this damned dress off of me and fuck me on this cute little setup you made for me… I need you, Zoro.”

That was all he needed to hear you say; it was more than he needed to hear honestly. His hands moved behind your back to pull at the ribbon holding your dress cinched to your waist and once that was done he was already sitting back on his haunches in the blink of an eye, hands grasping at the thick hem of your dress to heft it over your head. He tossed the dress to the side like the useless barrier it was and his gaze immediately returned to your beautiful body, unable for a moment to tear his attention away from the delicious curves he took so much pleasure in devouring with hungry kisses and love bites at every opportunity he could. You were so fucking breathtaking that he almost felt like it was his birthday every single time he got to undress you.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, baby. You know that right?” Zoro groaned as he sat between your legs and pulled you further up on his lap as he leaned down and began to press indulgent kisses across your chest, slowly bringing them down your fluttering stomach as his hands slowly caressed their way from your hips up your sides and around to your back once more so he could undo the latch to your pretty bra. “I’ve been dying for a taste of you since you stepped through that damn door looking fine as fuck, y/n.”

You sucked in a shaky breath when his mouth latched onto one of your nipples rolling it around on his warm tongue until it hardened, then watched as he switched to the other and repeated the process as his hands gripped the soft flesh with his gaze on you. “F-Fuck, Zoro…~” You moaned, and the sound of his name falling off of your tongue once more had him groaning into your breast as his erection pressed into your ass, bulging through his tight black dress pants. “Please baby, I can’t take much more of this teasing.”

Zoro pulled his mouth off of your breast with a soft pop and couldn’t help but chuckle at your eagerness. “Is that so? Well, I guess since it is your birthday…” He pulled away from you, smirking when you pouted, and began to ease himself down between your legs. His hands gripped your legs and hiked them over his shoulders so he could enjoy his delectable dessert. “Aw, don’t pout so much gorgeous, I’m just getting started. Now let me hear that sexy voice of yours.”

“Oh god Zoro!” You squealed when you felt his tongue eagerly push into your heat making your eyes roll back and your stomach flutter as your body subconsciously reacted—bucking your pussy against his face and making his tongue press even deeper inside. His nose brushed against your clit pulling another whine from you, and the cycle of building desire continued when he groaned against your wet cunt, sending vibrations through you that had you arching your back and gripping the blanket below. “That feels amazing, d-don’t stop baby, ahn…~”

Zoro had absolutely no intention of stopping, hands gripping into your thighs even tighter than before to take your squirming into account, not wanting you to push him away before he was able to get his fill and make his pretty princess squirt all over his face. He watched every little change in your expression as he purposely pressed his nose harder into your cute throbbing clit while he tongue fucked you, saliva and slick starting to drip down your thighs and plump ass. He found it adorable when you covered your mouth with the back of your hand reflexively from all the times you had to keep yourself quiet on the Thousand Sunny while he fucked you absolutely senseless with the rest of the crew still on board.

He pulled back for just a moment to let out an amused chuckle. “Princess, we’re in the middle of nowhere, not on a crowded ship. Put your damn hand down and let me hear that I’m doin’ a good job.” He said before he leaned his head back down and latched his mouth onto your clit, trailing one of his hands down from your thigh to your sweet gushy core spreading your puffy lips open so he could swipe his thick digits teasingly at your entrance, growling against your clit when his fingers were soaked before they even pushed into you. His gaze darkened with lust when he did begin to sink one and then two fingers inside of you, curling and scissoring them inside in the ways he knew would make you cry out and beg for him to fuck you like always. “I love how wet you get for me y/n. Makes it so easy to fit my cock inside of this pretty little pussy of yours.”

You immediately obliged his request, taking your hand away from your mouth so he could hear the sinful moans that were now spilling freely from your lips like the lies from Usopp’s mouth. “You’re doing… ahn.. s-such… an amazing job Zoro! Fuck baby, you’re the ngh… the o-only one that can turn me on like this!” Your breathless tone and moan broken sentences were exactly what he was looking for, and from how your walls were already fluttering around his fingers he knew he wouldn’t have to wait long at all before he got just what he wanted—you right in the palm of his strong hand and at his whim tonight. It may have been your birthday, but you were his; his lover, his best friend, sometimes the reason for his frustration, but overall you were his treasure and he was going to treat your body like the gift it truly was.

“Gooood job baby…~” Zoro cooed soft praise for you when he popped his mouth off of your clit since you were doing so well for him, then he spat on your delicious addicting bud and watched in fascination as the saliva trickled down to his fingers, being pushed into your hole to mix with your fluids. “That’s it y/n, tell me again princess. Tell me I’m the only one.” There was a slight possessive edge to his tone that he only got once in a while and you were guaranteed to not be able to walk properly afterwards every single time.

He planned on breaking you tonight.

Not that you would ever complain about it; you always carried the soreness like a badge of honor the day after, proud of yourself for pushing your limits to the breaking point with your lover. It was a more fun and intimate type of workout, which is what you usually said to convince him to skip a ‘real’ workout and join you in the bedroom you shared together. You reasoned that it ended up in you both being sweaty and out of breath regardless, so it still counted, right?

“You’re the only one that I need, baby!” You began again as you propped yourself up on your elbows so you could flick your attention back and forth between his fingers plunging into your squelching pussy and his beautiful face with his eyebrows knit in concentration as he masterfully brought you to your blissful edge. “Only you know just how to touch me to make me go crazy… Zoro, you’re the only man that can make me cum without even touching me..” That was true—all he had to do was whisper dirty talk in your ear in that sexy deep voice of his and you were creaming your panties without even having to touch yourself or be touched. It was amazing honestly, and he loved teasing you about it lovingly.

“That’s right princess, and I’m the only one that’s ever allowed to touch you like this ya got that?” Zoro said as his thumb pressed against your sloppy pussy and rubbed circles around your temporarily neglected clit that shot waves of pleasure through your body, arching your back off of the blanket and making him hum contentedly. “-and you know, I haven’t heard a single whine out of you lately. What’s wrong, beautiful? Have I already tamed my needy little brat…? I thought you were going to put up at least a little bit of a fuss by now.” He teased before pulling his fingers out of you to get the reaction he was looking for out of you. “Go on, beg if you want more.”

“Y-Yes Zoro! You’re the only one that’s allowed to touch me!” You cried out desperately, then your back slowly lowered back down onto the blanket as he withdrew his fingers. You pouted and grumbled from the loss of them but couldn’t help but watch when he popped them in his mouth and moaned just from getting to taste you on his tongue again. “Baaabbyy, I was so close! Please, I’m desperate at this point… I don’t care how greedy it makes me sound—I need you to fuck me right now Zoro.” Not a single moment was wasted before he had you begging to be fucked the instant he had you waiting for more. He had you wrapped around his pretty cock so well.

Zoro smirked and leaned back so he could flip you over, bringing his hand against your ass in a firm slap and delighting in the aroused moan you let out. He admired the sight of your glorious cheeks recoiling from the smack for a moment before he took both of his hands and got a good grip of your soft flesh. He lowered his face towards your ass and playfully bit down on one of your ass cheeks before he got tired of teasing you. “Mm… there’s my bratty baby. It’s okay to be greedy today.” He hummed as he leaned back once more and began to rub his hard throbbing erection against your ass, gripping your hips to bring you back against him; making you whimper from being so close to where you really needed him but still too far yet to reap the rewards of his pretty veiny tanned cock that made your mouth water. “You need me to fuck you right now, huh? So desperate to feel my cock split you and fill you up are you, pretty girl?”

“Mhm, please..? I’ve been good haven’t I—” You began to plead once more before you had to cross your arms under your chin to support yourself when you felt him finally press himself against your dripping pussy and push himself inside with a deep throaty groan. “Fuck, thank you, t-thank you baby!” Your sweet high pitched voice ripped through the room followed by a whiny moan when his hands gripped your hips to steady you as he pulled his hips back before snapping them against you repeatedly, eliciting an aroused growl to fall from his lips as he watched himself disappear into your core over and over again.

“You’ve been so good princess, using your big girl words to tell me what you need and everything… Now let me give you your reward.” Zoro teased as he took immense pleasure in hearing your moans and gasps as he gave in and gave you what you had been craving—his cock buried so deep inside of you that you could feel his precum leaking tip bullying against the entrance to your cervix; just what his pretty baby deserved on her birthday, a good deep pounding. “You’re so fuckin’ tight baby. Keeps suckin’ me in every time I try to pull out and fuck your pretty pussy.”

“Nghhh!” Another yelped moan lept from your lips as he brought his hand against your other unmarked asscheek while he continued his relentless thrusts, already causing lewd squelches that only the two of you could hear despite him fucking you on a public hill. It was honestly thrilling even having a chance of someone hearing the two of you, but that was the furthest thing from your mind when his balls kept slapping against your throbbing clit from the angle he had you in as he locked his arms around your waist and pressed his chest into your back so he could latch his lips onto your soft exposed shoulder. Your mouth parted into a ‘o’ as he fucked you so hard that you knew he’d be carrying you and your jelly legged self back to the Sunny when the rest of the date was ‘over’. “Oh—my—god—…!~” You gasped breathlessly as a dribble of drool began to leak from the corner of your mouth onto your arm as he easily pushed your eager body and mind to a fucked out state. The only thing that kept you from completely zoning out and being his pretty little birthday fucktoy was his hand bringing another slap across your ass.

“Don’t think you’re gonna pass out on me just yet princess. I just got started.” Zoro said with a strained laugh from the exertion as he gripped your hip again with one hand while the other hand went to tangle in your now messy hair, pulling your head to the side so he could latch his lips onto your neck. He sucked and nipped on the skin like an insatiable animal—tongue flicking out over the bruising skin in satisfaction before trailing sloppy kisses back down your shoulder all while keeping up his unforgiving heavenly pace. “Come on baby, I know you have more in you…~”

“I-I can’t.. I can’t even.. t-think straight anymore Z-Zoro..” You whined in a broken pitiful voice, trying your best to push your ass back into him to show him that you weren’t giving up just yet. It blew your mind how quickly he was able to get you to unravel, but he did know your body like he knew his blades after all. He knew every single touch that set your body on fire and when to speed up or go harder to make your delicate body bend and mold to his every whim. It was almost an unfair advantage, especially when you couldn’t even touch him in this mind blowing position. You spouted off more broken babbled begging and praises and Zoro knew you were close but he still didn’t ease up. He loved the feeling of your walls spasming around his length in an attempt to milk him.

“Aww I know princess but you look so pretty all fucked out like this, I just can’t help myself.” Zoro said as he pulled back and slammed into you roughly, holding his hips still for a moment to feel you tremble beneath him while he was buried as deeply inside of you as he possibly could be and he mentally swore that you had never looked more ethereal than you did right now in your most vulnerable state. He saw your eyes roll back and felt your slick sweet cream gush out all over his cock and balls causing him to moan throatily before gritting his teeth and resuming his thrusts despite how badly he wanted to empty his balls and fill you up already—using your clenching walls refusing to release him to his advantage. He was losing his mind just as you were but still he slowed down to savor the feeling, effectively edging himself so he could keep going just a little bit longer. “Good girl y/n, that’s it… fucking hell I can’t get enough of you baby. I’ll make it up to you baby, I promise.”

You were so far drowned in your bliss that you couldn’t even bring yourself to complain, and you knew Zoro would make good on his promise. Your post-birthday celebration would consist of lots of well earned pampering and soft aftercare that would have you swooning for your best friend all over again. “S’okay, Zoro… I want y-you to feel good too.~” Even though your body was trembling you pushed back against him, mewling every time you felt how well he stretched your tightened slick gummy walls at this slowed pace. You badly wanted to make him cum for you, to feel it fill your deep crevices before spilling out of you, and you wouldn’t have to wait much longer.

“You hope I feel good? I am on cloud nine right now because you feel fuckin’ amazing princess.” Zoro moaned as he let go of your hair—gently pushing down on your back before picking your hips up to get you to arch just right for him again to bully his tip against your sore cervix as he brought himself to the edge once more. The way your walls had a death grip on him made his eye flutter shut and his mouth gape open in pleasure as his thumbs rubbed soothing circles into your plush flesh. “Y’know y/n… I don’t think I’m gonna be able to stop with just one time tonight, and you only have yourself to blame.” He said as he sped up his pace to watch you claw desperately at the blanket, causing the pillows to tumble haphazardly off into the grass as the blanket bunched up under your clenched fingers. “Now tell me one pretty girl, want me to cum for you? Fill up this perfect fucking pussy and show you who you belong to? Gonna have to use your words again.”

“Fuck—fuck—y-yes Zoro! My love please, please cum for me baby..!” You wailed out desperately as your face pressed down into the blanket, drool puddling beneath your parted breathless profanity spilling lips, far too tired and fucked out to lift your head without his aid at this point. “So… f-fuck…! So fucking deep…! Please baby, I can’t take it anymore, You’re gonna make me c-cum againnnn!~” Your legs felt like they were about to give out on you but still he didn’t relent, even dragging one of his hands down between your thighs so he could press the pad of his middle finger against your clit in torturously slow but firm swirls while he chased his high. With eyes rolled back you felt another powerful climax rock your body and you were grateful that you were taking Zoro with you this time. You could feel his hips begin to stutter and his movements get sloppier as he continued to roll into you—his pleasured groans of pleasure sounding strained as he finally reached his limit.

“Good girl, y/n… you did so good for me, I knew you could do it baby.” Zoro cooed as his gaze was focused on the milky white ring around his cock where he disappeared into your sweet cunt. He granted your clit relief by withdrawing his finger so he could grope your sore and slightly bruised ass cheeks and get a better view of his throbbing veiny dick filling up his pretty little birthday princess with his heavy load of thick hot cum from not touching himself all day in preparation for tonight, just for you. He rolled his hips into you roughly a few more times before firmly pressing himself as deeply into your sweet spot as he could as his cock twitched—feeling your walls flutter and hearing your sweet gasp once again. “Haah… that’s it princess take it allll, milk my cock dry like the pretty little cumslut you are for me. Even half conscious you just can’t help it, can you baby?”

All you could do at this point was nod, moan, and babble broken nonsense as you felt him hit his first climax of the night, finally getting the present you had been so eagerly waiting for all evening as his cum exploded inside of your gummy walls. “Ahn..! Feels s’good baby.. f-fuck, always feels so good when you cum f’me…” You muffled against the blanket before his hands gently slid around your upper body to pull you up from your slumped over position so you were nestled comfortably against his chest, letting your mixed fluids dribble down your thighs and his. Your knees were shaking but Zoro had a firm grip around your waist now as he pressed a shower of softer kisses along your back, shoulders and neck. “Give me more kisses, baby...” You hum as you couldn’t help but happily rest your pleasure-drunk body against his, head craning back against his shoulder with your cheek pressed against his hot sticky skin as you puckered your pretty mouth and looked at him expectantly for a kiss on your soft neglected lips.

Zoro raised one of his hands to caress your cheek as he dipped his head down to press his lips against yours in a lingering kiss after your cute request for more kisses. “Don’t worry princess, the night isn’t quite over yet. You’ll get plenty more kisses, and after I let you rest for a minute—I’m gonna make you cum for me again. How does that sound, hm?” He said as his hand sank into your hair and pulled you into a deeper kiss—his tongue rolling into your mouth before you could even answer. “Happy birthday y/n.”

───── ⋆⋅ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋅⋆ ─────

The next hour was a blur of sticky overstimulating passion until you literally passed out from the pleasure and had to be carried back to the Thousand Sunny just like you had hoped. Zoro cleaned the both of you up as best he could before figuring the first thing he’d do in the morning was spoil you with a hot bath and a full body massage, then he tucked you into his side with a soft kiss to the side of your head, holding his treasure close while he drifted off to sleep.

All content unless otherwise stated belongs to: ©HowlTheSanjiSimp. Please do not copy, modify, translate, repost or promote my writing or graphics on other platforms. Please DO feel free to comment, reblog or follow <3

[ursulanoodles]

Random Harvey Headcanons Pt.1

He was bullied as a child-- by his family and kids at school

Started his career in emergency medicine, but lost a patient and switched to the mundanity that is family medicine so he could focus on his hobbies and interests

Has autism (war planes, ham radio, and old medical journals are his special interests, though he hides them and tries to contain himself when someone mentions any of these things in public for fear of being judged).

His parents treated him very poorly and he has a lot of childhood trauma and insecurities because of it. He was made to feel like he was never good enough and they pushed him to do well in school. Burnout definitely contributed to him moving away from home.

When the farmer arrives in Pelican Town, it has been quite some time since he’s had any sort of romantic partner. I would say at least two years.

He’s definitely been dumped for being too nice.

He never touched coffee until his residency, but now he can’t get enough. He got very into different styles of coffee brewing and owns several different coffee makers including cold brew, French press, and pour-over. Despite what some might think, he doesn’t drink his coffee black and takes one cream and one sugar.

Loves a charcuterie board with his glass of wine.

Very tall-- we’re talking between 6′4″-6′6″ and he has to duck through just about everyone’s doorway in Pelican Town or he’ll smack his head.

Smells like cinnamon and warm spices (and coffee-- obviously)

His favorite kind of cookie is oatmeal raisin

Is very loving and protective in a relationship and will do anything for his partner, even if that means inconveniencing himself.

Has virtually no friends, though he does sometimes hang out with Elliott and Leah.

Makes his own pickles and likes them very garlicky.

The kind of guy who brings a book to a bar. He is genuinely not there to socialize, he just wants a glass of wine while he reads and he needed to get out of the house.

Comes from a little bit of money, but he has nothing to do with his family and does not take handouts from them. Despite this, he does have some expensive tastes and enjoys dressing well.

His favorite wine is a red zinfandel or he’ll go with a cabernet sauvignon if that’s not available. He does also enjoy white wine, Riesling being his favorite white.

Shaves with a straight razor

Wears a mustache to hide the fact that he has a baby face (though in my fic I gave him a small scar on his upper lip that he hides haha).

Is meticulous about his personal hygiene and appearance

Absolutely treasures his alone time

Has a temper that he hides very well

[rabbitcruiser]

National Pinot Noir Day 

Gather friends and family for a wine-tasting affair, perhaps with a selection from different regions like Bergundy, France and the Willamette Valley, Oregon.

Pinot is a fantastic wine, but a temperamental grape. With its rich color and complex flavors, it is largely considered one of the most hedonistic wines ever made. Elegant and berry-lie, its velvet flavor is the perfect addition to any affair. National Pinot Noir Day celebrates this wine and the regions of the world in which it’s cultivated.

History of National Pinot Noir Day

Every wine deserves to have a day dedicated to its consumption, and none more so than Pinot Noir. Pinot Noir is so named due to the dark color of the grapes, and the pine-cone shaped clusters they grow in on the vine. Showing a strong preference for cooler climates, the grape of the same name is grown primarily in Burgundy, France, though Willamette Valley, Oregon in the USA and Walker Bay region of South Africa both produce notably large crops. Of course, cultivating Pinot Noir is not a task for the faint of heart, for these grapes are difficult to cultivate and tricky to turn into wine.

Perhaps that’s appropriate for a wine that is both rich and complex. The skin of the grapes are thin and don’t offer the protection of thicker skinned grapes, and can be finicky during the aging process, frequently being uneven and unpredictable. The tight clusters require careful management lest rot set in, and this often involves careful management of the canopy.

For those who are willing to brave it and cultivate the skill, the wine that is produced is beyond measure. National Pinot Noir Day celebrates all that is required to produce this wine and the delicious bounty that unfolds.

How to celebrate National Pinot Noir Day

Head down to your local store and procure yourself a bottle of this delicious wine. Pinot Noir comes in many varieties that each carries the personality and taste of the regions they come from. Get together with your friends and each brings a bottle of your favorite Pinot Noir and then collect other bottles of vintages of Pinot Noir with which you are less familiar. National Pinot Noir Day is a great opportunity to broaden your palette and indulge in your favorite variety of this dark wine. Enjoy it and share generously!

Source

[k-marzolf]

Homemade.

(established relationship, fluff, alcohol consumption, tipsy reader, kissing, fem!reader)

501 words.

You stirred the homemade tomato soup as it cooked on the stove, humming to yourself while it snowed heavily out, early for New York. It smelled delicious. It just needed a few more spices, though.

Billy had been coming home exhausted, dragging himself through the door, and only eating a little of this, little of that. He hadn’t sat down for a meal in who knew how long. You worried about him.

No one took care of Billy. You wanted to. Your mother had instilled in you the virtue of taking care of others. You remembered her running around during the holidays attending to everyone’s needs. Especially when your father was back from overseas. She took care of him. You wanted to do that for Billy.

You saw your parents’ loving relationship, and wanted that with Billy. You never cared he was an orphan, he was yours and that was enough.

Your friends had accused you of being a ‘50s housewife, even though you worked at the local library. You didn’t care for their opinions, acts of service was your love language. It didn’t make you a doormat.

You’d both barely had any time together. You missed him, and hoped he’d take a breather with you. So, there you were cooking for him. You smiled, taking a taste of the soup.

Perfect.

“Maybe this will help Billy feel better.” You hummed softly.

And you might have broken into his wine cabinet, and had been working through a bottle of Zinfandel red wine.

Billy came home later, exhausted as usual, shaking snow off his coat, and noticed something smelled good. He hung his coat up, walking into the kitchen where he spotted a pot of soup. You were always cooking for him, and god his stomach he loved it. At first he’d been annoyed by how attentive you were, but he’d grown used to you spoiling him.

His stomach rumbled, and he lifted the lid. Fuck. He loved soup. He dipped a spoon in, tasting it. He groaned. Goddamn, it was good.

“Are you snitching?” You asked, coming around the corner laughing, and whacking him with a pot holder.

Billy grinned. You were a sight for sore eyes after all the bureaucracy he’d had to deal with the last few days. It wasn’t the first time he’d considered keeping you. He’d never cared for serious relationships, having come from a broken home, but you made it appealing.

And god, you made coming home worthwhile, he thought kissing you, tasting wine on your tongue.

He raised an eyebrow, pulling back, “Did you get into my wine cabinet?” He asked, leaning close to your face.

You giggled feeling a little tipsy, “I was thirsty while I was cookin’. It was good, by the way.” You said, not bothering to deny it.

Billy shook his head, pinching your cheeks. “And tipsy too,” he said, watching you sway a little.

You smiled. “Want another kiss, and I’ll give you some soup.”

Billy happily obliged, stomach rumbling.

tags; @idaofinfinity @e-dubbc11 @rosaleenablack @firexfate @aoi-targaryen

[scottharveywines]

[winemastery]

Chronic Cellars Zinfandel Wine Review (Episode 397)

[aziraphales-library]

hello! Do you have works in which crowley's a chef/can cook? Thank you sincerely! x

Hi! Here are some chef Crowley fics...

Flambé by gazing (T)

“Chef Crowley, sir? I don’t think he does special requests-“ “He does for me.” Aziraphale cuts in smoothly. “Tell him it’s Aziraphale.” - Alternatively: Aziraphale frequents Devil’s Kitchen, a dessert restaurant in Soho. He’s rather infatuated with the head pastry chef…

Sometimes it's cosmic, sometimes it's cocktail weiners by myladyclegane (M)

All executive chef Anthony J Crowley wanted was a cider and some time with the girls(of the Golden variety) after his double shift, what he gets is playing savior when his best friend and next door neighbor (and desperate crush) has to unexpectedly host a last minute game night for his awful co-workers.

As Sweet As This by vantablck (G)

One moment, Crowley had a high position at a top Michelin rated restaurant. The next, her career was taking a metaphorical million light-year dive into a lake of boiling sulfur and she was moving back into her small childhood town. Cue Aziraphale, the childhood best friend she’s been pining over since time immemorial. Cue Crowley’s oh so brilliant idea of co-owning a restaurant with her.

Till I Saw You by curiouswriterkr (E)

Crowley is a burned out chef recovering from adrenal fatigue in Tadfield. Aziraphale, a gifted musician with a big, soft heart, happens to be performing one evening at an open mic. Their eyes collide and inevitably, so do their lives, helping each other step into healing, truth and more joy.

Style and Substance by Cabernet_Woebegone (E)

“But y’know, if my boss finds out I’m helping you even a little, they’re gonna throw me out on my ass.” “Yes, I understand it is a bit of a conflict of interest for you… Is there something I can offer you in return? Something you would like?” Aziraphale questioned hopefully. You, Crowley thought loudly as he took a second sip. I want to know if you moan when you kiss the same way you do when you try something delicious. I want to know if your lips taste like Zinfandel. “Yes, actually.” Aziraphale is having difficulty running his restaurant, and it isn't helping that he believes the place across the street is trying to sabotage him. To his surprise, chef Crowley comes to him on friendly terms. Together they come up with an arrangement that could benefit them both. (Explicit rating for chapters 10 , 14 & 17, see tags for description. Please do not record this as a podfic or repost this fic anywhere! Thank you!)

Capellini d'Angelo by AngeliqueTombee (E)

Ezra E. Fell is new to America, the restaurant industry, and to getting positive attention -- especially from men the likes of Chef Anthony Crowley, an award-winning chef who's angling to bag his first Michelin star. Despite both being foreigners in a foreign land, can Ezra and Crowley overcome hellish hours, diabolically bad co-workers, fiendish guests, apocalyptic-feeling hurdles, and all the other rigours of typical industry life and make their relationship work? And should Crowley even bother aiming for the stars?

- Mod D

[ripeteeth]

For today’s blind tasting, I called

1. Pinot Grigio - Alto Adige, Italy

2. Chardonnay - Burgundy, France

3. Nebbiolo - Piedmont, Italy

4. Zinfandel - Oregon, US

Let’s see how this goes

[talesfromsiteredacted]

Random Things Dr. Cimmerian Said Asleep

Dr. Cimmerian is, first, typically a ray of sunshine. Second, he has a bad habit of dozing off while reviewing reports. And drooling on a few here and there. He does say some weird shit while asleep, I blame the copious amounts of coffee everybody consumes. Once more, without context!

"Peaches? With long pork? Pushing the boundaries of fine cannibal dining I see, Ferdinand. I'd suggest some shiraz or a nice zinfandel."

"Yoshi! Put down that D-Class right this instant! He's a very boring serial killer. The nice Chaos Insurgency guy next to him would taste better, not that we condone a humanitarian diet here."

"Dyo, honestly... the crinoline is outdated with good reason, namely it's too damned impractical. Stick to corsetry."

"Eighty kilos of gunpowder, twenty kilos of iron nails, a further twenty kilos of roofing tar? In her skirts? I've heard people say 'If I'm going to die, you're coming with me!' before, but... that's hard-core. No wonder they stopped burning witches after that. Woman was a massive legend, but not a witch. A REAL witch wouldn't need all that to make burning her a bad idea."

"Clef... your ex... Woman has an entire magazine warehouse of issues. And you put your junk in the crazy. Never. Sleep. With. The. Crazy."

"Dad? Why is the beer growing mushrooms?"

"AAAAAHHH! WHO THE UNHOLY HELLS GAVE 096 A FUCKING CLOWN SUIT!"

"Put down the cake knife and walk away, Dr. Bright. You knew when you asked Mabel for German chocolate what you're in for. Besides, you could just hit her with her own terrible cake. Not that O5 would condone that, of course."

"Uh... Ben? Is it me, or are the daisies staring us down?"

"We actually nailed jello to a tree once. Clef bet Kondraki $200 he could figure out how it's done. Benny almost ate his sword over that one. Turns out you can do it, provided you simply nail the unopened box to the tree."

"Cain, can you locate in the notes where anyone asked Dr. Matthieu for his opinion?" A pause. "Nowhere? Huh. As I thought. Thank you."

"Whomever said you couldn't herd cats never was at my Aunt Martha's house. All she had to do to herd cats was just touch the food bag, and every cat in her house came running."

"WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO FEED THAT POOR IDIOT TO 682? He's going to get an upset stomach."

"Uh... Agent Dimitriov? I think you might have forgotten part of your uniform. Aren't your knees cold?"

"Are you sure we can't just yeet him out of the airlock when no one's looking? Yes, I know the spaceship is on Earth still, but it's far enough off the ground for terminal velocity to become a factor. Just push him out of the vent."

"You hit the Scarlet King in the junk, with a hammer? And survived? Okay, Abel... I take it back. You're not just a Semetic badass, you're THE Semetic Badass."

"How? How in the hells did you manage to shoot yourself in the back with no one else around you in a sealed room? The fuck you mean, 'The Invisible Man has a gun?' Admit it, you had someone shoot you to get out of Peanut-sitting again, didn't you?"

"Coffee. Extra large, heavy on the cream and sugar. No, larger than that. Larger." A pause. "What do you mean, you don't sell by the gallon?"

"Dr. Gears. This is the SCP Foundation. Sarcasm and pessimism are practically survival mechanisms here. Give the kid a pass."

"NOOOO! COME ON, WHAT THE BLUE FUCK DID OREGON DO TO DESERVE LENNY? YOU UTTER BASTARDS!" In the middle of a meeting with the Ethics Committee, eyebrows were raised, and coffee spilled.

"Run."

"I, too, would rather be under the sea, in an octopuses garden in the shade. You thinking what I'm thinking, my dive brother? Right. Let's leave these landlubbers and go hang with the fishes."

"Funny, 035. First, we can't KEEP you dressed, now you're out here looking like a weird ass male version of Rogue from the X-Men. Malicious compliance is acceptable, I suppose."

"You keep making poultry explode, Alto. Perhaps your charming assistant should give you cooking lessons?"

"WHY IS EVERYTHING ON FIRE?!? AGAIN?"

"Screw the files! Don't let 999 burn! That little blob of joy is my only reason to live."

"That's it. Get me a team of ten really strong D-Class, a case of 100 mph tape, a tranquilizer gun fully loaded, the electric purple snow leopard furry suit in lost and found, and a camera. Let this be the last time anyone sees Bright butt in public."

"I'm not above blackmail and we both know it. Gimme. The. Pie."

"Simon? I think this might be above my skill level. Can you please get Dr. King to calm down?"

"I can't believe Agatha talked him into a mankini. Didn't need photo evidence though."

"WHO THE HELLS TAUGHT THE KETCHUP PUPPIES TO 'FETCH THE LEG'? Max? That's... honestly impressive. Pity about that guy from MC&D, though. He did have it coming, to be honest."

"You ran... the Bible... through the Clockworks? On "Very Fine". And, got basically over a thousand pages of 'Try not to be an asshole, mmmmkay?'. Experiment inconclusive. Run the 'Communist Manesfesto' through next, my accountant is curious."

"Why are you here? Basically, 343 likes a joke as much as the next person. Oh. You meant why are you in the Femur Breaker? Well, we gotta get 106 back in containment somehow. That's where you come in. For what it's worth, I'm sorry about this, you seem like a lovely fellow."

"They're just firing arrows at us. You have an SMG, shoot them back. Some MTF agent you are."

"He's dating THAT? I've seen less silicone in a RealDoll. And, better fashion sense, for that matter."

"Wait... hold the phone, Abel. You're older than Jesus, but never had a cannoli? Rabbit, my girl, this will not stand. Cannoli the man!" A brief pause. "I KNOW, RIGHT? Whomever invented the cannoli deserves a sainthood."

"Primitive and outdated concept on a crutch!" Preceded by a thump.

"New Bright List entry: 'Dr. Bright is no longer allowed to access the Cursed Clown Nose of Improbability under any circumstances. No, not even to prevent an XK Class Scenario.' Noted. This item #857, or 858? I lost track."

"WHAT kind of butter? Oh. I thought you said something altogether more horrifying."

"JULIAN, YOU ABSOLUTE WALNUT! You forgot Quinn's birthday. Of COURSE you're in trouble for it. I got you covered though. They're still into lemons and tea, right? You're golden. Lemon blossom tea set, courtesy of the fine folks of Etsy. Pay me back on Friday."