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scriptura-adrepticius · 6 years ago

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Kalon - Zhu Xingjie

I’m... kinda back? I hope you enjoy this (and I hope people read it, though tbh I wouldn’t blame you if you didn’t).

Sorry for being gone so long. Can’t guarantee my postings will be consistent mainly because of school, but I think I’ve found some inspo again and I really hope it stays :) Love you all! Thanks for staying with this blog!

Pairing: Zhu Xingjie x OC/reader

Series: Types of People

six-string boy and fawn girl

credits to @trans-bean-but-spooky and @la-petitefille

Genre: fluff, domestic!au

Word Count: 2.6k

Kalon: a beauty that is more than skin deep

Sometimes Xingjie wonders about you and you wonder about him. It usually leads to you or him falling deeper in love with the other.

Masterlist | Types of People

imagine you were yanchen actually don’t, i think your heart will combust

Some days you look at Xingjie and wonder how a man with such goodness and innate beauty can exist.

It started in college when you first met him. You were tutoring Linkai in math, and one day Xingjie came to drop him off at the library. One look at him and you were blushing.

You were never particularly adept around the opposite sex.

Many people say it’s the eyes that drew them in, that made them start, that made them fall in love. But with Xingjie… it wasn’t his eyes. It was the way he spoke.

His beautiful voice, sweet and rich, drew you in like a fish to a hook but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care. You’d been taught not to make judgements immediately, but with Xingjie, you couldn’t help it. A man with such a sweet voice had to be just as sweet a person.

Thankfully, you were right. Xingjie proved your judgements correct and more, and when you finally plucked up the courage to ask him out and he accepted, you were more than overjoyed. It was the first time you’d done something so forward, and you were amazed that it’d turned out so well.

Maybe that’s the thing about Xingjie, you wonder. He always manages to bring out the best in you, the parts of you that are hidden to the world, to yourself. He always seems to know you better than you do yourself, and though that should freak you out, it really doesn’t.

How can such a man exist? you wonder. Handsome, talented, sweet, kind… the list goes on and on. Every day you see him, you feel like you discover something new about him, something that only enhances the soft aura he seems to emanate wherever he goes. You bring this up to him one day and he simply laughs.

“It’s because you bring out the best in me,” he says, lacing his hand with yours.

“And you, me,” you reply, squeezing his hand slightly.

Xingjie’s smile isn’t blindingly bright. It’s soft, full of joy, but calm like the moon. He shows that smile now and you relish in its soft glow. “Isn’t that what a significant other is for?”

It’s impossible for you not to smile in response. “Of course.”

. . . . .

Some days Xingjie looks at you and wonders if you realize your own beauty.

It’s small things that make him wonder. The way your eyes brighten at the sight of something beautiful. The way you drift around the apartment, moving like a wisp of the wind. The way your cheeks redden when he places a soft kiss to your nose.

Sometimes you’re huddled in a corner of the couch, a blanket over your legs, reading a book as he works on some music. Sometimes you’re sitting next to him on the grass, back against a tree, watching a butterfly flit amongst the bushes as he writes lyrics. Sometimes you’re sleeping at the table, a cold plate of food by your side, having tried to stay up until he got home.

Quiet beauty, quiet grace. You’re like a fawn - quiet, sweet, innocent.

More often than not, you catch him staring and you send him a questioning look, silently asking why. At restaurants you brush the corner of your lips, wondering if food is on your face. At home, you pat your cheek, wondering if marks are imprinted there after falling asleep on a book. At his studio, you rub your face, wondering if there’s a pen mark there.

And more often than not, Xingjie smiles and shakes his head, taking your hand in his. And more often than not, he whispers, “Do you know how beautiful you are?”

And more often than not, you smile shyly and blush.

And more often than not, Xingjie presses a kiss to your lips.

. . . . .

Some days you look at Xingjie and wonder how a man so perfect would ever choose you.

There was a time when you thought no one would ever love you. Your father died when you were young, and he understood you better than your extroverted mother ever would. She could never comprehend why it was so hard for you to approach strangers, to get up in front of crowds, to speak louder than your usual whisper. Your stepfather was much the same - though perhaps they both loved you, they never understood you.

It took a long time for you to come out of your shell. It took a long time for you to let people in. You had few friends, but your friendships lasted a long time, and your current friends swear that the long process of breaking through your walls was worth it. Every time they say that, your heart flutters a little and you smile.

But it was a long time before you had such friends, and as you grew older, you wondered if you would ever find a perfect love, like the kind you read about in books. Bliss. Unconditional acceptance. Sweet smile and soft kisses. Unrealistic love.

You’ve never been particularly outspoken. You’ve never been particularly attractive. So why would Xingjie ever choose little old you?

He’s sitting nearby, scribbling something on a piece of paper as you make a pot of tea. You sit in front of him, idly watching him write in silence, resting your cheek on your hand as you wait for the tea to boil. When it’s done, you stand up quietly and pour it into two mugs, taking one for yourself and setting the other in front of him.

Xingjie looks up, startled, and smiles. “Thanks, Jingyi,” he says, and even though you’ve dated him for more than two years, his voice still never fails to make your heart warm.

“You’re welcome,” you reply sweetly, leaning over slightly. “What’s that you’re writing?”

“Lyrics,” he says shortly, hiding the words from your sight. You make a face, sipping from your mug, and it makes him laugh. “You’ll get to listen to the song first,” he promises.

“I’ll hold you to that,” you reply, reaching over to take his hand in yours.

And he keeps his promise. He calls you one day at three in the morning, nearly falling asleep over the phone, and asks you to come to the studio. It’s a ten minute walk in the bitter morning cold, but you persist.

After all, it’s for him.

He greets you sleepily, dark eyes dull with exhaustion, but he eagerly leads you to the computer and forces you to sit on his lap. Just before you put the headphones over your ears, though, he stops you.

“Remember when you asked me why I chose you?” he whispers. “A few weeks ago?”

You nod.

“Well, here are the reasons why.” He tugs the headphones down for you, hits a button, and then music begins to fill your ears.

It’s your smile

It’s your laugh

It’s the way your eyes shine

It’s your sweetness

It’s your joy

It’s the way you look at me, baby

I live to make you happy, to see the smile on your face

Because that smile, that laugh, that sweetness in your voice

It’s beautiful

And if I had to choose again, I’d choose you, my girl…

Maybe your eyes are tearing up at the end of the song. Maybe you’re smiling so widely that your face is beginning to hurt. Maybe you’re about to start full-on sobbing into Xingjie’s shoulder.

But it’s okay.

Later that morning, he makes you swear that you won’t doubt your own worth anymore. You swear that you won’t, and then you begin bawling into his shoulder again.

Fuck, you’re a mess.

But as long as Xingjie’s there to smile at you, kiss you, and whisper “I love you” in your ear, then you think you’ll be fine.

. . . . .

Some days Xingjie looks at you and wonders why you chose him.

Most of the time it’s you who’s insecure about dating him and he feels stupid when it’s him. He’s always the one to comfort you, and it’s strange to have it be the opposite.

But obviously there are blue days, there are gray days, when Xingjie is uninspired and sad and grumpy and everyone tiptoes around him, trying to leave him alone. Except you.

“Go away,” Xingjie snaps when he hears the knock on his door. He’s got headphones on but nothing’s playing, and though his computer is open and displaying all the music software he’s got, he’s not using it. Just staring at it.

“Hell no,” he hears you say, and then the door is pushed open and you stand in the doorway, arching an eyebrow.

Xingjie blushes out of embarrassment. “Fuck, sorry, Jingyi.” He tries for a smile. “I thought you were Linkai.”

“Linkai?” You wrinkle your brow, settling onto Xingjie’s bed. “He isn’t even here.”

“He’s been spamming me with texts and I figured he was going to come here and bother me some more,” Xingjie groans, finally taking the headphones off. “It was a mistake to give him that key.”

You shrug. “Maybe. But anyway, what’s got you so grumpy now?”

Immediately the black mood settles over him again. His eyebrows furrow, his eyes darken, his mouth thins into a line. “Deadline,” he mumbles.

“When?”

“Sunday.”

“Three days, then,” you hum, looking thoughtful. “You can spare one.”

“What?” Xingjie sputters. “No, I can’t!”

“Yeah, you can,” you retort, an uncharacteristic twinkle in your eye. “Change your clothes. Those look like they haven’t been washed for days. We’re going out.”

Despite his protests, you somehow force him out the door. He knows you have no plan which would on a normal day be strange since you’re always so organized. But he doesn’t mind.

As you drag him around the city, making his feet ache and his throat turn dry from too much laughter, as you hold his hand tight and look at him with such love and care in your eyes, Xingjie wonders just what he did in his past life to deserve you.

“Had a better day?” you ask finally as you slip your shoes off in the doorway, looking up at him with your sparkling eyes.

“I did,” Xingjie laughs, cupping your cheek in his hand. He presses a kiss to your lips. “Thank you.”

You give him a peck on his nose, stretching up on your toes, and smile. “You’re welcome.”

. . . . .

Some days you look at Xingjie and you fall in love with him all over again.

Autumn is your favorite season. The leaves turn orange, the wind turns crisp, and all around you is the excitement of the upcoming holidays, of times to spend with family and friends. The smells of warm coffee and hot chocolate pervade the air, bringing a smile to your lips.

You only mention your love for piano in passing, mostly because it’s just… too intimate an activity to call just a hobby. Piano used to be your life before you discovered science, and it was always an escape for you when the world became too much.

For the first few weeks you and Xingjie dated, he never knew you played any instruments. Whenever he invited you to his studio, it was always him who played, never you. Somewhere along the way you let it slip that you could play and since then, never has a trip to his studio gone by where he doesn’t request for you to play something on the old grand piano in the studio down the hall.

The keys, yellowed with age, are always smooth to the touch with just enough grip that you don’t have to worry much about your fingers slipping. You love that grand piano almost more than the one at home, and it’s only second because of the memories associated with your old upright.

It’s your birthday, and Xingjie, as always, has taken into consideration your unease with large crowds in planning a small party. The celebration is still rowdy, however, mostly because Linkai and Justin are both there to liven things up. You laugh, though - their antics don’t bother you anymore.

It isn’t until later that night when everyone’s left that Xingjie’s able to drag you away to the studio. Your curiosity is piqued - he’s already given you a gift, the treble clef pendant you now wear around your neck. You wonder silently what this is about.

Once inside the building, he turns away from his own studio in favor of the one with the piano. Your eyebrows furrow but you don’t question him, not even when he sits down at the bench, motioning for you to sit beside him.

“What’s this about?” you finally ask, sitting down. You lean your head on his shoulder, relishing in the warmth and stability that he seems to emanate.

“Your second birthday present. Just listen,” he whispers, then sets his hands on the keys and begins to play.

It’s a medley. Eight of your favorite pieces connected into a seamless ten-minute performance, culminating with your song. The song that you two danced to on the night of your first kiss. The song that you’ve jokingly deemed your theme song.

As he plays, your heart swells, and you think you’ve fallen in love with him again. Tears in your eyes, you tell him as much when he finishes.

“What made you fall out of love with me?” he teases gently, brushing a strand of hair away from your cheek. His touch makes you shiver.

“Absolutely nothing,” you reply, eyes shining. “I just fell a little deeper.”

. . . . .

Some days Xingjie looks at you and wonders if you’re real.

Xingjie can never find the words to describe you. Your peace. Your tranquility. The way you get startled easily, the way your eyes widen when you do. How you hum softly to the melodies he’s working on.

He wonders if that’s because you’re not from this planet. For the only word that even hints at what you are is perhaps otherworldly, and even that only touches upon the slightest essence of your being.

Until one day, when he finds the perfect word as he absentmindedly browses the internet.

The moon is bright, shining through the small window, illuminating your face with ghostly light. Your eyes are closed, your breath fanning his face as you slowly drift into the arms of sleep. Xingjie watches you doze off, his own eyes becoming heavy as well.

Linkai deems this kind of interaction awkward, but Xingjie thinks it’s just right. He cherishes these quiet moments, where he can enjoy your beauty in peace.

“You know,” he whispers sleepily, pulling you a little closer beneath the blankets, “I found the perfect word to describe you today.”

You open your eyes slowly. “What is it?” you ask, curiosity piqued. Xingjie’s heart leaps a little, hearing your tired, sweet voice.

“Kalon,” Xingjie enunciates, his tongue tripping slightly over the unfamiliar word. “A beauty that is more than skin deep.”

Even in the dark, your blush is unmistakable. Xingjie relishes in your surprise, in the way your eyes widen the tiniest bit, the way your cheeks pink slightly, the way you gaze at him with so much love in your eyes.

“Then, Xingjie,” you whisper, “I think it’s the perfect word to describe you too.”

Neither of you need the faint moonlight to know that the other is smiling.

Nor do you need the faint moonlight to press a kiss to the other’s lips either.

#idolproducernet #idol producer #idol producer zhu xingjie #zhu xingjie #idol producer scenarios #fluff #domestic!au #zhu xingjie scenarios #gramarie entertainment #types of people #kalon #scriptura-adrepticius

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nine-prcnt · 7 years ago

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as if it’s your last

this is purely for my own enjoyment, even though i could actually see some parts playing out and it broke my soft huba heart 😭🤧

word count ; 1,921

genre ; angst

pairing ; poor!zhu xingjie x rich!reader

au ; prestigious school ( @duckmcduckerson gave the idea for a prestigious school au and i ran with it)

Zhu Xingjie. The name was infamous on the lips of your year.

You had heard the rumours. Who hadn’t? He was a nobody from nowhere and the tales of his origins spread like the plague, taking on something new with every person who spread it.

You paid little to no mind and as fate had it, you would be paired together for an assignment. While your friends at first pitied you, it was soon discovered by you that there was no reason to.

Beneath his cold exterior was an attentive guy with a fierce love. The two of you fell into a routine, studying and getting coffee. It wasn’t long after that it blossomed into something more and while neither of you were especially shy, there was a long month or two of stolen glances and rouged cheeks.

Once everything was out in the open, it felt right. The subtle things, like intertwined fingers, patterns traced on the back of your hand or hip and the heat of his breath on your skin, set your heart alight. You felt more alive than you had ever been and this seemed like it would last forever

That kind of happiness only lasts so long though.

It was your second year and your heart had been set on, at this stage for a while, on a future with Xingjie. The choice of an uncertain future with Xingjie, pursuing his dream of becoming an artist, was something you were willing to undertake. The two of you had spent late nights until early mornings entangled in your bedsheets or each other, talking of what you planned to do after school.

At first, Xingjie had been wary of whether your family would approve of him. He was a nobody with only his unrefined talent and perseverance. That, he thought, could never match their rich and privileged ideas of suitors for their only child.

Although you had comforted and reassured him that they weren’t like how he was imagining and would gladly welcome him. That is until Cai Xukun was introduced by your parents.

You knew him from a few business parties you had attended with your parents. He was one year your senior, a nice boy really. Your impression of him was that he was easy going, naturally charming and just very sweet.

You had been surprised one night, coming home late from Xingjie’s and Cai Xukun was sat at your dinner table with both of your parents. Quickly you changed and spent the rest of the night in Xukun’s company. After that it became something that happened, his family coming over or you going to his house.

This meant cancelling a lot of dates with Xingjie or just not being around each other often enough outside of school. He understood, or at least he said and tried to.

In the shadows of your bright and hopeful life, Xingjie wandered, uncertain and the distance now the spark to ignite a trail to his inevitable down spiral. He started being more secretive, hiding his songs from you and snapping at you when you went to open his lyric notebook.

There was no longer the melodic hum of his latest song, or inviting clap of his hand on his jeans welcoming you to sit on his lap and each time you walked through his door, you regretted it a little bit more. The once warm scent of incense and candles was replaced by stilled musk of charred wood and ungodly burn in your throat that you wished you didn’t recognise. You were watching your home dying slowly as everyday passed.

It was these days that you found yourself drawn to Xukun more, his soft voice and gentle embraces as you poured your heart out, your heart trembling when not so long ago it had been the most stable. It was his voice that had told you to go back to Xingjie, that he would stop the frequency of your families’ gatherings and everything would be okay with you and Xingjie again.

The next day you had gone back to Xingjie’s, trying to fight the unsettling feeling when you arrived. You used your key as always. Even when hearing you come in, there was no welcome or acknowledgement of your presence. You threw yourself onto the couch next to Xingjie, leaning into his side. A sting pierced your heart when he didn’t wrap his arm around you, drawing you ever slightly closer.

‘I was thinking pizza ? Maybe a movie? I’m all yours tonight.’

Your suggestions should have made him feel better, that finally there was a night alone for the two of you. Instead it just fueled the fire that raged in him and he just couldn’t bite back his comment.

‘When you’re not Xukun’s huh?’

You didn’t know if you had misheard but you could have sworn that Xingjie had just said Xukun.

‘What did you say?’

You had sat up now and pulled yourself away from his side.

‘It’s nothing.’

‘No. Zhu Xingjie, we said at the beginning if we have something to say, we say it.’

‘Fine.’ He stood up. ‘I said, ‘when you’re not Xukun’s?’’

Now you were up.

‘And what the hell is that supposed to mean?’

‘It means that you have been blowing me off way too much to hang out with him.’

‘If by that you mean that my parents have been asking me to be at the dinners then yes.’

‘Then what was last night about?’

‘Last night?’

You were confused until it hit you. You had been at his house since the afternoon, after you had visited Xingjie but he was being the same as recently so you left.

‘How the hell do you know that I was there?’

‘A friend of mine saw you there.’

‘Oh, so you have your friends keeping tabs on me?’

‘No, he wouldn’t even have mentioned it, except that your parents weren’t with you. Care to explain why you were there?’

You were beyond shocked. This was not a conversation you had ever thought the two of you would be having.

‘I don’t have to explain myself to you. I shouldn’t have to.’

‘Oh, so what? If this situation was reversed, you wouldn’t be bothered if I spent more time with someone else than you?’

‘No, I wouldn’t be bothered and even if I would be, the faith and respect I have in you and for you would settle me.’

‘Well I’m sorry if the fact that I have a fucking partner going into other guys’ houses alone worried me!’

‘No.’ There was something venomous in the rasp of your voice and overwhelming in the biting of your nails into your palms but Xingjie stopped and realised what had just transpired. The pounding of his blood in his head ceased and the look in your eyes drove a stake through his heart.

‘You do not get to turn this around on me. It is not my fault that you feel this way. You’re trying to tell me to feel sorry for how I was born? Fuck you.’

And you didn’t know what vengeful spirit overcame you, but one did and spat the words you knew would really burn.

‘Xukun wouldn’t have this problem.’

‘Well if he is so perfect, go be with him! Don’t slum it on my account. Have your happily ever after. Rich and privileged.’

You let him burn out, suffocated by your silence.

‘You know what.’ You heart trembled. ‘It’s nice to know what you think of me.’ And that all of those whispers under the covers and patterns traced into your hip meant nothing really.

You left.

The next week went by, and each second you didn’t know if you were happy that time was passing or sad to think of what had passed. The time with Xingjie had been the climax of your life. Nothing would ever compare to the feeling and connection you had with him, or at least thought you had.

‘Hey darling, are you ready for dinner?’

Your mom had popped her head around the door.

Dinner? The idea seemed familiar to you.

‘Oh, don’t tell me you forgot. You’ve been talking about tonight for so long now. I’ll pick something out for you while you go freshen up.’

‘Thanks.’

You had forgetten until now but tonight was the night that you were supposed to tell your parents about Xingjie. Now you weren’t so sure of making that announcement but you figured that they at least deserved to know where you had been and who you had been with all those nights when you were staying at his. Thinking about it all, you were thankful for the trust and independence that your parents had given you.

The restaurant was nice and dinner matched. Your parents finished their meal before you and while you were taking the last bite of food, you dad cleared his throat.

‘So, we have something to talk to you about.’

You were confused. It had completely slipped your mind earlier when your mom said they had something to tell you.

‘Well it’s more like something to tell you.’

They glanced at each other.

‘Us and the Cai’s have been talking about a merger.’

You nodded, a slow twist in your stomach. Why did it feel like there was twist coming at the end of what they were saying.

‘And we agreed that, in order to... complete the merger, you and Xukun should get married.’

You choked but at that point in time, the food lodged in your throat seemed like the least of your worries.

‘I need to go.’

The hopeful smiles were wiped from your parents’ faces and replaced with confusion but moreso concern.

‘Are you okay?’

‘We thought you would be happy about this.’

You couldn’t, or maybe you wouldn’t listen to them. And stumbling out of the restaurant, you went wherever your feet took you.

The door opened, a disheveled Xingjie stood there in his bare chested and tired glory.

‘Y/n...’

He could see the stains on your cheeks from where the tears had slipped down.

‘What’s wrong?’

You wrapped yourself around him, burrowing your face in his chest.

‘I’m getting married.’

His jaw opened and his mind thought of a million things he wanted to say in the moment but none came out.

‘I was going to tell them,’ you rambled on. ‘About this, about us but they broke that to me first and I just couldn’t bring myself to say anything. I just ran and ran and ran and... I ran here.’

‘It’s okay love.’ His hand ran over the back of your head, a soothing touch.

‘I’m-

‘It’s too late Xingjie, and I don’t want your last words to me to be an apology.’

His eyes searched yours, seeking some guidance as to what he should do.

‘Make love to me.’

His lips crashed into yours, hands gripping you tight, not wanting to let go. The soft brushes of skin that whispered, ‘I’m sorry.’ The soothing kisses after to tell you, ‘I love you.’ The desperate hands on you saying, ‘I need you.’

But in the morning after you knew he was asleep, you ran your fingers through his hair, toying with the soft black mess. You left kisses on his shoulder, hoping that he would feel them and know how you felt.

And then, you ran.

You left.

With those words that couldn’t help but linger behind your closed eyes.

As if it’s your last.

part one // part two

masterlist // rules // wips

#zhu xingjie #91%#gramarie #idol producer #idol producer imagines #idol producer scenarios #nine percent #idol producer writing #idol producer aus #nine percent imagines #nine percent scenarios #idol producer bulletlist

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rowangst · 7 years ago

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fic recs for days

so tumblr has now become my second home and i realised that i prefer reading and writing stuff here than on wattpad? so that’s cool man, i’ve found so many good fics that i really want to share ahh

here’s a compiled list of my all-time favourite picks!

will add more when i have time to read ^^

updated : 7/7/18

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

NINE PERCENT

wang ziyi

➺ touch by @berrylip - spy/gang/mafia au! in which ziyi saves you from his enemies, even when the situation looks bleak. (my short one sentence summary doesn’t do the actual story any justice ok)

➺ cloud nine by @itszeren - when you, a simple fashion blogger, gets a job under your brother’s group as a stylist, you weren’t expecting wang ziyi to make that much of an impact on your life.

fan chengcheng

➺ faking it by @dahyunmingyu - college!chengcheng x reader in which he becomes your fake boyfriend

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

IDOL PRODUCER

zhu xingjie

➺ 10 seconds by @itszeren - basically, you, a classical musician meets the god of underground music and chaos ensues.

#fic rec for days guys #m-ficrec

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ao3feed-idolproducer · 7 years ago

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Cold

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2rwvi5y

by Rach4040

Words: 690, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: 偶像练习生 | Idol Producer (TV)

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M

Characters: Zhu Xingjie, Y/N reader

Relationships: Zhu Xingjie/Reader

Additional Tags: winter-y scenario for xingjie x reader, basically xingjie is late for a date while the reader freezes their bum off, also i wrote this when i was dead tired and its unedited so.. my apologies

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2rwvi5y

#ao3feed #fanfic #idol producer

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scriptura-adrepticius · 7 years ago

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A Heart of Ice - Zhu Xingjie

Uncalled for and unrequested, but inspired by Beauty and the Beast, some beautiful fanart I CANNOT FIND, and because Xingjie looks like a prince.

Pairing: Zhu Xingjie x OC/reader

Genre: fluff, angst, royalty!au

Word Count: 7.2k

Zhu Xingjie has a heart of ice, and unbeknownst to you, you’ve been tasked with melting it.

Masterlist

if he looked at me like that i’d melt

Deep in the forest lies a forgotten palace, a forgotten land, a forgotten king. Cursed, he wanders the stone walls, unable to even glimpse the outside world.

The king used to be vain, you see. He was pristine, perfect, his skin pale and smooth, his eyes sharp but charming, his voice sweet and alluring.

He had everything. And that was his trouble.

The king grew up a spoiled child, used to flattery and gifts, unaccustomed to want. Whatever he wanted, he had or would get by whatever means possible. And when his father died and he ascended the throne, his requests only became more and more impossible.

It was a wintry day when the fairy came, disguised as an old woman seeking shelter, to see just how horrid this king truly was.

“Please, just one night, my good king… Please…”

She found out when he ordered her away.

In return, she cursed him. He stared in horror as she began to glow, a brilliant white light rendering him blind.

All the nobles and ladies around him vanished into thin air.

The candles flickered once and went out.

The drapes blew shut and when he ran to open them, the fairy simply laughed. “Young king,” she chuckled, “you would not want to see the sunlight.”

Frozen, the king could only stare at the now-beautiful fairy, who appraised him with a cold smile. “You will live forever as the king with a heart of ice, cursed to never see sunlight until you have learned to love once more. If exposed to the sun, your heart will melt too fast, and your time on earth will be gone.”

The king felt a stabbing in his heart, bringing him to his knees, and he clutched his chest in pain. He felt himself grow colder, saw his skin turn paler, felt the color drain from his face and his lips.

A cruel laugh echoed in the ballroom.

“Farewell, young king, and may we meet again soon.”

. . . . .

It’s cold.

Stupidly, that’s the only thing you can think at the moment. A snowstorm is brewing, and all you can think is that you’re cold.

“Well, I’m not wrong,” you mumble.

The wind is howling in your ears, the snow obscuring your vision. You clutch the reins on Xing harder, huddling down into your cloak as you urge him on. Xing obediently tries, but he can’t see either, and the snow on the ground is impossible.

The sun is nearly down, and the sky is darkening fast. If you stay outside longer, there is no guarantee on how long you can survive. Survival instinct spurs you on, and you doggedly continue with Xing.

It seems like a blessing when you finally see what seems to be a wall through the whirling snow. As you get closer, the wall grows larger, until you can just barely make it out to be a sort of very large house. Xing perks up, as though recognizing the house as a safe haven, and he speeds up slightly, slogging through the deep snow.

“Just a little more,” you encourage, patting his neck, before squinting through the snow to take a good look at the place.

“Oh my god,” you whisper.

It’s not a house.

It’s a palace.

A large, imposing gate - the wall that you saw - rings the grounds in which a tall, stone castle stands. You swallow, looking around nervously. It’s getting dark, and though you aren’t in a blizzard yet, the snowstorm very well might develop into one. So you steel your nerves, jump off of Xing, and lead him forward.

Once at the gate, you pause, unsure of how to get in, as the gate is made of heavy stone and metal. However, it seems you need not worry, because the gates suddenly swing open though not a single person is in sight. You look around suspiciously, but worry for Xing and the strengthening wind push you forward through the gates.

The gates are almost taller than you. Xing could probably just jump over them if he tried. There’d be no way for you to get out.

You shudder, not because of the cold this time, but because of how ominous this all feels.

You wonder if it’s too late to turn back.

A loud neigh jerks you around, the reins ripped from your grasp. Xing suddenly spooks and you shout, trying to calm him down, but he turns, rearing his neck, before running through the gate.

“Xing!” you yell, racing after him, but the gates clang shut right in your face, the loud noise ringing in your ears and rendering you frozen, unable to move.

You gape, stepping forward, but an invisible force repels you, sending you stumbling backwards.

Cold terror settles over you, but you force yourself to breathe deeply and turn around.

“Well, that settles it,” you mumble. With Xing gone, you have no way of going anywhere else. So you continue, hurrying to the doors of the palace as the wind continues to pick up speed.

The large, stone doors open surprisingly easily when you push, looking around for any sign of something living. “Hello?” you call, allowing the doors to close behind you.

There is no reply.

You shiver in the darkness, glancing back at the door. Again, you wonder if it’s too late to leave.

“Hello?” you try again.

Silence.

“Hello.”

A shriek builds up in your throat but you swallow it down, whipping around to see a lantern in the darkness, illuminating the side of someone’s face. A wave of relief and anxiety washes over you, and you bow slightly in their direction.

“I’m sorry for intruding, it’s just the storm outside was getting worse and my horse spooked and left and this was the closest place…” Your words die away when the person - well, the man - gets close enough for you to see his face.

He is striking, handsome, but inhumanly so. Perhaps the right word to describe him is otherworldly.

His skin is pale, so pale it’s nearly white, but not sickly. He stands with an elegant, cool grace you associate with nobles. His coal black hair contrasts sharply with his skin, and on anyone else, the combination would repulse you. However, it just makes him seem more aloof, even further away from you, a mere mortal.

His nose is tilted perfectly, his mouth unsmiling. A severe, wintry coldness seems to emanate from him, making you shiver even more.

But it’s his eyes that truly captivate you. And yet at the same time, they repel you.

They are dark. So dark.

And so, so cold.

“What brings you here, traveler?” he asks, gazing idly as though you are just a bug waiting to be crushed. You swallow, shrinking under his cold gaze, but you make an effort to hold yourself tall.

Your voice is steady when you speak. “I was trying to reach the next town, but I got lost when the snowstorm picked up. This place was the only place I saw, so I… I tried to come here. My horse spooked and ran away, and I have no other place to stay. I ask for your permission, please, to stay for the night. I will leave tomorrow morning.”

That disdainful gaze, that aura of cold, that wintry anger- is it anger? You’re not quite sure- makes you want to run away, but you swallow and stand your ground. “Please,” you plead again. “Just for tonight.”

The cold laugh that the man lets out sends chills up your spine.

“Traveler,” he says, staring directly at you. “I don’t think you understand.”

You take a step back involuntarily. “W-what...” You take a deep breath, steadying yourself. “What don’t I understand?”

There’s a long silence, and you’re about to bolt, blizzard or no, when he speaks.

“Once you enter this palace,” he says slowly, “you cannot leave.”

. . . . .

You jolt awake, panicking when you see that this is not your room. It takes a good thirty seconds for you to remember the events of yesterday, and when you do, you burrow under the thin blanket again.

“Please tell me this is all a dream,” you mumble, poking your head out of the covers once again, holding on to that stupid, vain hope.

Alas, the stone walls of the room shatter that dream. You sigh, kicking the covers away, before padding over to the small closet where you’d stuffed your things last night.

“I hope I brought that extra shirt,” you mutter, swinging the door open.

“What the fuck?!”

The closet is not empty, or even close to empty. Clothing of all types and designs fill the space with a rainbow of color, a stark contrast to the dark stone walls that surround you.

You blink.

You blink again.

You close the door and reopen it.

The clothes are still there.

You close it and open it again.

Everything is still there.

“Is this magic?” you murmur, hesitantly tugging on one of the shirts. To your surprise, it feels solid beneath your fingers, and you pull it out.

Dark blue, with intricate white designs bordering the collar and sleeves. You look between it and the rest of the fabric in the wardrobe.

“Why not?” you finally say, switching your rumpled, scratchy shirt for the new one. The cloth is comfortable and warm against your skin, and you pluck at it in curiosity as your stomach rumbles in hunger.

Food. Right.

You exit the room nervously, peeking around for any signs of the cold man from yesterday. There are none, so you venture out, stepping quietly on the stone floors. After wandering around for a long time, you finally locate what seems to be the dining room. There on a table lies a small assortment of fruits, breads, and other foods.

“Where does this all come from?” you ask yourself, eyeing the food uncertainly. You cautiously pick up an apple and examine it before biting into it.

Well, it tastes fine. You shrug before devouring the rest of the fruit.

“Magic, perhaps,” you murmur. You can’t think of any answer.

Once you finish, you take to wandering again, as there’s nothing better to do. You walk through the halls, taking random turns and opening random doors. You find a lounge, what seems to be a study, a lot of bedrooms, and then you find a library.

The room is large, filled with shelves that are in turn filled top to bottom with books. Mesmerized, you step inside, gazing in wonder at the book-laden shelves.

“Am I in heaven?” you squeak, breathing in the welcoming scent of old books. You pull one book off a shelf, scanning the title eagerly before sitting down to read.

The day passes in this manner, devouring one book and then pulling down another. It’s only when the clock strikes seven that you finally pull yourself from the fictional world to come back to reality.

You carefully mark your place with a scrap of paper, taking the book with you as you attempt to find the dining room again. It takes a good fifteen minutes, but that’s better than the thirty it took you this morning.

Still locked in a slightly dreamy haze, you step inside the room, ready to eat. However, you snap out of it quickly when you see the man from yesterday standing by the table.

Cold.

You shudder.

“You’re late,” he says simply.

You don’t sit down. “I wasn’t aware that there was a set time for dinner,” you reply, eyes flitting back and forth between the table and the door, wondering if you could just skip dinner like you skipped lunch.

“Well, now you are,” he replies indifferently. “Sit.”

You don’t particularly want to, but something tells you that you can’t disobey. So you sit down gingerly, placing the book down next to you. You notice the man’s gaze travel to it, but you ignore it, instead filling your plate.

The meal is uncomfortably silent. You want to talk, but at the same time, you don’t. There is no noise at all save for the sound of chewing and silverware clanking on plates.

“Where does the food come from?” you ask impulsively.

Then you want to throw yourself out the window because Xinyi, what the hell kind of conversation starter is that?

“Magic,�� the man replies without even looking up.

You blink slowly.

Okay… so I was actually right.

“You don’t believe me?” he says, raising an eyebrow. You nod vehemently. “I believe you,” you say with conviction.

Well, how else could you explain the clothing and the food? You’re pretty sure he didn’t cook it all himself, at least.

He just raises one eyebrow. You kind of feel like he doesn’t believe you, but what does it matter? So you busy yourself with your food again.

You finish your food in silence, standing up awkwardly. “Uh, where should I put my plate?” You shift your weight from one foot to the other nervously.

“Just leave it,” he replies, standing up as well.

“Magic, huh,” you mumble to yourself, placing the plate down. You pick up your book, ready to leave.

“Xinyi.”

You freeze.

How does he know my name?

“The magic only keeps you from leaving the grounds,” the man continues, looking at you boredly. “You can still go outside.” He begins to walk away.

“How do you know my name?” you demand.

He turns back, a ghost of a smirk tilting his pale lips. “Magic.”

What an annoying jerk-

“And if you must know…” He pushes a lock of hair back, the simple motion rendering you speechless.

“My name is Zhu Xingjie.”

He walks away, leaving you to wonder just how he knew your unspoken question.

. . . . .

“Zhu Xingjie,” you mumble to yourself, wandering through the library. It’s a name that fits him, for some weird reason. You shrug, plucking a few books off the shelves. You’ll read those today.

A peek outside the heavy curtains tells you it’s sunny outside. You remember what Xingjie told you, that you could leave the castle, just not the grounds. You haven’t gone out in some time, so you think why not? and head out.

It’s cold, as expected, and you shiver even with the warm coat wrapped around you. You walk around for a bit, exploring the massive grounds, poking at a few strange statues here and there. They’re creepy, almost gargoyle-like, but interesting.

You find a large tree, and after climbing up the branches, you settle yourself in and continue reading.

Evening comes and you start to get hungry again, even after snacking the whole afternoon, so you reluctantly climb down the tree, shuffling inside the castle with rosy cheeks. You’re not sure if you’ll see Xingjie again, and you don’t really want to, but hunger wins over and you enter the dining room.

Xingjie is there. You don’t particularly care to sit with him for another meal, after they’ve been so awkward this whole week, so when you’re done filling up your plate, you start to walk away.

“You went outside?” he suddenly asks, a strange wistfulness in his tone.

Startled, you nod slightly. “Yes.”

He nods silently, turning back to his own food. You notice his expression turn from a blank face to a frown, but you stay no longer.

That strange display of emotion stays with you. You can’t help wondering why he seemed to have felt the way he did.

Still, what is there you can do about it? It’s hard enough to be in the same room as him- how can you get him to open up to you?

It’s a difficult question, one that you don’t have the answer to.

. . . . .

You decide to start by initiating conversation at meals. But wow, it’s hard.

First of all, you have no idea what to ask.

Second of all, it’s really hard to talk in Xingjie’s chilly presence.

Third of all, he doesn’t want to talk.

A few months drag on this cold manner.

“So what do you do during the day?” you ask one day, forcing yourself to keep the words flowing. It’s hard, and you’re running out of ideas, but you forge on anyway.

If you’re going to spend the rest of your life in this godforsaken place, you might as well get along with the only other person being held captive.

Xingjie looks up uninterestedly. You fight to keep your eyes steady, staring at him, though you want nothing more than to back away into the wall.

It’s not just that he looks scary. He certainly does, in a stupidly handsome way. However, it’s that unreadable expression in his eyes that makes you want to flee.

“Why do you want to know?” he responds, raising a single eyebrow.

Oh my god.

He’s been like this the whole past few months, and you now want to punch the stone wall, despite the fact that you’d probably break your hand.

Scratch that. You want to punch him.

He’s not making this easy at all.

“No particular reason,” you say evenly. “I’m trying to maintain a conversation, and I’m curious.”

He looks at you impassively. “Why do you want to maintain a conversation?”

You squeeze your eyes shut, willing your anger to go away before you throw food in his face. If you threw food, he could probably freeze you right then and there with that apathetic gaze of his.

“Because if I’m supposed to stay here for eternity, I might as well attempt to get along with the only other person being held captive in this godforsaken place,” you snap.

A cold expression passes over his face, and you involuntarily shiver, chills running down your spine.

“You will never know what it feels like to stay here for an eternity,” he says lowly, standing up.

You stare, shrinking slightly under his cold eyes. He walks over slowly, and you scramble to stand. You want to get away, because he’s seriously scaring you, but it’s as though his cold gaze has you frozen in place, unable to move.

He stops in front of you, his face only a foot from yours. You shiver, his cold aura hitting your skin.

Perhaps he really is the embodiment of winter.

“You will never know,” he whispers, his eyes angry and… is that helplessness you see?

His hand comes up, almost as though to grasp your chin, but just as he’s about to touch your skin, he drops it to his side quickly as though he’s just remembered something. Without another word, he stalks out the room.

Your hand comes up, touching the skin where he almost touched you. You shiver when you feel just how cold it is.

. . . . .

The events of last night come back with full force when you wake up the next morning. You groan, shoving your face back into the pillow.

You really don’t want to face Xingjie today.

It’s strange. In that moment where he nearly touched you, you saw so much emotion in his eyes, so much emotion that you’d never seen before.

Perhaps you’re so shocked because you couldn’t even think of him as a human with feelings.

The thought makes you feel really guilty.

Your thoughts turn back to that moment, your hand coming up to touch your chin as you gaze into the mirror. It’s bright red and prickles, though it doesn’t seem to be any worse than that.

“Oh god,” you whisper.

He nearly gave you frostbite from touching you.

Actually, he didn’t even touch you, which makes things even worse.

Is he even human? You feel guilty for thinking that, but it isn’t natural, his ice cold touch. His wintry aura isn’t normal either, as is the pallor of his skin.

You swallow, swinging your legs out of bed to get a closer look in the mirror. The frostbite is mild, alright, but you can already see the blister that’s supposed to form afterwards. You prod at it, wincing in pain.

“He may as well be the embodiment of winter,” you mutter.

You stay in your room the whole day, save for sneaking a couple plates of food out of the kitchen. But by late afternoon, you’re getting antsy, so you set off to the library to find a new book.

You push the door open, only to see him browsing the shelves. He looks over and you stop short, nervous and a little scared.

Xingjie’s eyes narrow, and he walks over, staring at your chin. His hand comes up and you jerk away reflexively before realizing he has gloves on.

“Relax,” he says quietly, though a bit haltingly, as though he isn’t used to speaking with such gentleness. “The gloves will prevent what happened yesterday.”

You relax slightly, allowing him to touch your chin gently. You look anywhere but at him, unsettled yet transfixed by his sudden kindness.

He takes a deep breath. “I’m sorry,” he says, voice serious. “I lost control of myself. I shouldn’t have done so.”

You swallow, forcing yourself to untense despite your proximity to him. “I have to apologize as well,” you say. “I didn’t know that what I said would affect you so much. I’m sorry.”

“It’s… not your fault,” he says, taking a slight step back. “You didn’t know.”

You want to ask why what you said hurt him so much, why it made him so angry, but the look in his eyes tells you that that is a question for another time. So you swallow your curiosities in favor of nodding.

“It’s not your fault either,” you say. “If someone had said something to anger me, I can assure you that my reaction would have been much more than touching their chin.”

It’s unexpected, what happens next, but Xingjie smiles slightly. Not a smirk. A real smile.

You gape.

“Perhaps,” he replies, “but I also must apologize for being so rude to you over the past few months.”

You make a face. “Let’s put that behind us. It’s fine.”

Xingjie raises an eyebrow, moving over to let you inside. “You certainly let go of things quickly.”

You shrug a little. “I don’t like holding grudges. I forgive, but don’t forget.”

Xingjie nods, looking thoughtful. “Well, I’ll leave you now,” he says. The look in his eyes softens the smallest bit as he bows slightly, about to walk away.

“Wait,” you say, before you even realize you’re speaking. He looks at you, surprised, but you swallow and forge on.

“Please don’t leave on my account,” you say softly. “You don’t need to go.”

Xingjie opens his mouth, staring at you in mild shock. You don’t hear the thoughts echoing through his head, but if you could, you would have heard Why would she want to be in the same room as a monster?

And yet something possesses him to stay.

You smile as he nods slightly and a little awkwardly, then steps back into the room.

. . . . .

Your friendship with Xingjie is tentative at first. The blister on your chin stays for a while, reminding you of just what he can do. It’s hard to relax yourself around him, though you make an effort to do so.

It’s also a little difficult to maintain a friendly relationship with someone whose beauty is so utterly cold and ethereal.

But it happens, bit by bit. Though you don’t see him around much, the castle doesn’t feel so uninviting anymore, and when you do see him, conversation flows. Not very smoothly, but it’s a start, and you find yourself more comfortable around him.

You still have a couple of questions, though. For one thing, besides when he apologized, you’ve never seen Xingjie outside of dinner.

What does he do during the day?

It’s a simple question, one that you should have no problem asking. However, something stops you. It feels like you’re invading his privacy, somehow, like it’s something private for Xingjie and Xingjie only.

And yet you ask anyway, because the scholar within you won’t rest until she gets her answers.

To your surprise, when you ask, Xingjie just kind of looks down. He looks… almost embarrassed.

Embarrassed.

Who knew the almighty ice prince Zhu Xingjie could look embarrassed?

You look at his expression. It’s… cute. You almost coo in amusement.

“I… make music,” he says quietly, barely able to look at you.

You tilt your head, unable to see the reason behind his reaction to his statement. “Music?” you echo.

He nods.

“So you play an instrument?” you ask, leaning forward.

Xingjie hesitates, then nods. “Piano, guitar… basically all of the instruments in the music room.”

You’re too excited to notice his slightly confused expression. “Can I hear you play?” you ask, gazing at him eagerly.

It seems to take a moment before your question registers in his mind, and even then, Xingjie is still a little out of it when he answers. “After dinner,” he promises, and you have to fight to keep the wild grin off of your face.

. . . . .

Xingjie is confused.

Very, very confused.

First of all, why weren’t you… fazed… at all… by the fact that he liked to make music in his free time?

His parents had devoted their entire lives to telling him that his passion for music would take him nowhere, that it was useless, that he had to devote his life to running the kingdom and not to such stupid trivial pursuits. As such, the nobles of the court devoted their lives to telling him the same thing.

Even after his parents died and he became the cold shell he is today, he hesitated to go to music even though nobody could stop him.

All because of that stupid stigma against the arts that he was brought up to believe in.

So when you expressed enthusiasm in his interest, in his music-making, he was shocked. And what shocked him even more so was the genuine delight in your eyes.

In all his years in the court, he’d never seen anyone look at him as genuinely as you did.

When you continued to ask him about playing instruments, he was so lost. He couldn’t believe that anyone was speaking to him like this. Especially a monster like him.

Really, did you just not realize the pure coldness that he emanated? The fact that he was literally a frozen, animated… semi-human?

And then when you asked him if he could play for you… well, Xingjie really can’t explain the slight feeling bumping around his chest. It’s been so long since he really felt something for anything other than his music that he really just doesn’t know how to explain it.

Whatever the feeling is, it isn’t unpleasant.

It’s then that he learns you can play the instrument too, not as well as he but granted, he’s had decades of practice compared to your mere eighteen. It’s then that the feeling grows, filling his chest as he watches you play with your simple grace and charm.

You confuse him so, so much.

And yet… this confusion… it isn’t unwelcome.

Xingjie sighs, getting up abruptly.

He’s never felt like this before, and he’s not sure what to make of it at all.

. . . . .

You lie in bed, still on cloud nine because of the beautiful music this night had given you. Or, more accurately, that Xingjie had given you.

His fingers danced on the instruments, making sounds that were almost too beautiful for your ears. He was talented, sure, but you could see just how much dedication he had to music and how hardworking he had to have been to reach that level.

You turn over, humming one of his melodies quietly. It had been a wonder to watch him play, to watch how he transformed from a cold, awkward being to someone with so much passion.

A smile crosses your lips involuntarily.

It’s like you’re seeing Xingjie in a whole new light now. First he was the cold, unwelcoming prince of the castle. Then he became more like an awkward, shy transfer student from another school.

And now he’s more like the dreamy musician with a passion that’s infectious, that inspires you to do better, to do more.

Your heart thumps, thinking of his bashful smile when you complimented his playing, and you feel yourself reddening slightly.

Who knew such a cold person could make you blush like this?

Really, if there wasn’t so much… mystery… behind Xingjie, and if you knew more about him, you wouldn’t hesitate to say that you could definitely fall in love with him.

But there’s those other questions that continue to prod the back of your brain and force you to stay vigilant and guarded against these feelings in your heart.

Just why is Xingjie here? Why is the castle always so dark, and why are the windows never open? And why is Xingjie so… cold?

. . . . .

Now that you know where Xingjie is during the day, you don’t hesitate to enter the music room quietly, sit in a corner with a book, and read as he fashions new melodies and harmonies that bless your ears with their beauty.

Xingjie doesn’t hesitate to join you in the library either, with him giving you recommendations every now and then. He doesn’t say it, but you have a suspicion that he’s read everything in the library.

Which brings another question to your mind: how long has he been here?

“You look like you’re thinking hard about something.” You start a little, not having noticed that Xingjie’s stopped playing and is now looking at you with slight concern. “Penny for your thoughts?”

You really want to ask the questions you have in mind. But for some reason, you also don’t. It feels like… taboo. You don’t know why, but it’s like you just can’t ask.

So you opt for something else. “What’s the extent of the magic of this place?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, like…” you trail off, trying to put your question into words. “Does everything necessary just… appear? Or is it like if you wish for something, it appears? Or what?”

“If you wish for something within reason, it will appear, I think,” Xingjie confirms. “I haven’t fully tested this magic either, despite-” He stops suddenly, then shakes his head. “Never mind. I just know that after I learned the guitar, I wished for more instruments, and the next day they were here.”

You notice his sudden hesitation and you want to pry further, but you don’t. Silence falls, and unlike other silences you’ve had before, this one is awkward.

Xingjie seems to know that wasn’t the question you wanted to ask.

“So what did you really want to ask?” he says quietly.

Damn, you were right.

You swallow. The air suddenly seems colder, and you shiver involuntarily, scared to verbalize your thoughts.

Fuck it, you think. And you open your mouth to talk.

“What is your connection to this place?”

Xingjie immediately clams up. You can see it. And you feel really bad for making him so uncomfortable, but you also really want answers.

“I…” He starts, then stops.

You’ve never seen this look in his eyes. To you, Xingjie has always been confident, cold, shy, embarrassed, sweet, and so many other things, but never… nervous.

And this expression makes you scared. What could be so bad about your question that the ice prince is now nervous?

“I can’t tell you that,” Xingjie finally says. “I’m bound by the magic of this place. I can’t tell you. At least… not yet.”

You nod slowly, putting down your book. “Then can you tell me why it’s always so dark?” You think for a moment, coming to a sudden realization. “Come to think of it, I’ve never seen you go outside either.”

Xingjie looks even more helpless. “I can’t tell you that either.”

“Okay.” You nod again, feeling awkward. The atmosphere is tense and uncomfortable, and you quickly stand up to leave. “See you, Xingjie.”

“Alright, Xinyi.”

You leave the room hurriedly, eager to escape the tense silence.

. . . . .

A week passes. Then another. And another. And another.

And, slowly but surely, the friendship you’ve built with Xingjie begins to crumble.

It’s your fault, you suppose. If you hadn’t asked those stupid questions, things wouldn’t be this way.

You’re miserable. You never realized just how much you enjoyed your time with Xingjie, how much you enjoyed talking to him.

You never thought you’d feel this empty without him.

It was your decision to stop going to the music room after that tense conversation. You stay in your room or outside for the most part, knowing that you won’t see Xingjie there. Dinner is awful - you’d forgotten how bad the silences used to be.

Without Xingjie, you feel empty and desolate. It’s like he’s become an essential part of your being over the past months, and you’re incomplete without him.

But if you’re miserable, Xingjie feels worse. He doesn’t blame your curiosity - he mostly blames himself for not being able to tell you what you want to know.

If only he could explain why he was so cold, why he couldn’t go outside, why the castle was always dark and how he was bound to this castle.

He sighs, his head in his hands. He’s sitting at the piano, but today, inspiration won’t come to him.

It’s strange. Whenever you were with him, lying quietly in the corner with your book, ideas came naturally to him. Seeing your smile inspired him. You made him feel that strange feeling in his heart, that strange feeling that he couldn’t figure out before… but now he’s pretty sure he knows that it is.

Love. That’s what it is.

Love.

But Xingjie’s afraid. He’s never loved before, for one thing. The only people he’d ever cared about were his three friends, all of whom disappeared when he was eternally bound to suffer here. He’s never felt this raw emotion for another human, this longing for someone that makes him almost physically ache for want of you to be near him.

For another thing, Xingjie has only one shot at getting this right. If you aren’t the one, and Xingjie only mistakenly thinks he’s in love, then things could go very, very wrong. For you and for him.

And the last thing, the scariest thought of all.

What if you don’t love him back?

Xingjie finds it difficult to believe that you could ever care for him in the same way he cares for you. He’s literally subhuman - his heart of ice confirms that.

How could you ever love someone who’s barely human?

The days drag on, with you slipping through his fingers with each passing moment. Xingjie becomes desperate to see you, but even when he does, it’s like there’s a wall between you two. An invisible wall that makes communication more difficult than ever.

It’s killing him. Well, probably not really, since he’s literally immortal and bound to this fucking place until he learns to love. But it really feels like it’s killing him.

And so he makes a decision.

. . . . .

You’re standing, ready to leave the dining room. You cast a glance at Xingjie, who looks conflicted about something.

You turn, but Xingjie’s voice calling your name has you stopping in your tracks. “Xinyi.”

“Yes?” You look back to see Xingjie walking up to you.

“I… um…” Xingjie looks down, then back at you, a slight blush on his face. “Would you dance with me?”

It takes a few seconds for the question to register in your mind.

Dance?

“Here?” you ask, perplexed.

Xingjie quickly shakes his head. “No. In the ballroom.”

“Why?”

“I wanted to tell you something, but in a livelier situation.” Xingjie smiles slightly. “And from my past experience, dancing is livelier than me sitting you down at a table to tell you.”

“But I have nothing to wear,” you say, looking down at your trousers and shirt. They’re undoubtedly nice clothes, but for a dance, you need a dress. Unless Xingjie plans on being unorthodox.

Xingjie laughs a little, a sound you’re glad to hear after so many weeks of silence. “Xinyi, remember that this place is magic?”

You blush. “Right.”

“Go check your closet,” Xingjie says helpfully. “I’ll meet you there.”

With that, he walks around you out the door.

. . . . .

Icy blue silk, white satin gloves, a rose pin in your hair, light blue shoes. You watch your step, doing your best not to trip on the stairs.

It’s with nervousness and anticipation that you walk to the ballroom, hoping that you don’t look a total mess, but all those thoughts fly out of your mind when you see Xingjie.

He looks so, so handsome.

His blue silk shirt matches your dress, as do his white gloves, contrasting with his black pants. His eyes are still as dark and deep as you remembered, but it seems that they’re… twinkling. An expression you’ve never seen before.

“You look very handsome,” you say shyly, taking his outstretched hand.

“And you look very beautiful,” he says back, unable to take his eyes off of your face.

You blush under his gaze, allowing him to lead you inside. “Are we dancing without music?” you ask, looking around at the various instruments leaning against the wall.

“Magic, Xinyi,” Xingjie says, whirling you into position. You attempt to recall the dances you were taught back home, hoping that this won’t be too different.

You look around, startled, as music begins to play. You catch a glimpse of a violin floating in the air before Xingjie is moving, placing his hand on your waist and yours on his shoulder, and clasping the other in his.

“Let’s dance,” he whispers, his cold breath hitting your face. You shiver slightly, but in delight, before following his lead.

It’s strange, awkward almost, to be the only two dancing in this enormous ballroom. But after the first dance, your surroundings melt away, your attention focused only on the man in front of you. And you become comfortable enough to ask the first question.

“So,” you say, “what did you want to tell me?”

Xingjie twirls you under his arm slowly, looking suddenly serious. “You had questions before that I could not answer.”

You nod.

“I’ll answer them now,” he promises, “but don’t interrupt me until I’m done, okay?”

“Okay,” you reply.

There’s a short silence as the music dies, signaling a new song. The opening bars are soft, eerie, and haunting, and you shiver in Xingjie’s grasp.

“I was once a king,” he says, looking into your eyes. “I was vain, selfish, and horrible. I had everything. I wanted for nothing. And if I wanted for something, I would get it. No matter what. In short, I did not love.”

You remain silent, unable to look away.

“One day a fairy came, disguised as an old woman seeking shelter. I refused her.” Horrible pain twists Xingjie’s face and he looks away for a moment to compose himself. “It sounds terrible, but that was the person I was back then.”

You find it a little hard to believe, but seeing the pain in his eyes, you know that he’s telling the truth.

“In return, she cursed me.” Xingjie swallows. “Everyone around me vanished. The lights flickered out. And when I tried to open the drapes… Well, in short, the fairy had cursed my heart. I did not know how to love - my heart was proof of that. So it literally became a heart of ice.” A bitter smile crosses his face. “So I’m not even human. I’m a monster.”

“You’re not a monster,” you say staunchly. “Get that idea out of your head.”

Xingjie laughs a little sadly, adjusting his grip. “Alright, if you say so.

“Anyway, if I went outside,” he continues, “if I saw the sunlight, that ice would melt, and I would live no longer. As long as I remained in the dark, I would live, eternally bound to this castle until I learned to love.”

You nod slowly. Then, unable to restrain yourself, you ask, “But why couldn’t you tell me earlier? Why tell me now?”

A slight smile twists his pale lips. “If I told my story to anyone I did not love, I would die. Immediately, painfully, I don’t know.”

Your heart pounds painfully in your chest as Xingjie stops dancing, the music coming to a rest. It’s so silent in the huge room that you can hear your breathing, shallow and quick.

“You love me?” you finally ask, voice barely a whisper.

“I think I do,” Xingjie replies, his voice equally soft. “Do you love me as well?”

You nod once, twice, three times. “I think I do,” you whisper.

Xingjie’s gloved hand finds its way to your cheek, caressing the skin with his thumb. His touch is cold but dulled by the cloth of his glove, and you revel in the way his hand brushes against your skin, gently pushing away a fallen strand of hair.

You lean closer, cupping his face in your hands. You stare into his eyes, those dark eyes you fell in love with, those dark eyes that hold you captive in place. You are spellbound, feeling his breath ghost across your lips.

“Are you sure you love me? A monster?” he whispers.

“I said, get that idea out of your head.” You glare at him teasingly. “And yes. I am sure.”

And you press your lips to his in a gentle, sweet kiss.

. . . . .

It’s cold.

Xingjie’s lips are so cold.

It repels you and you almost pull away, but you force yourself to come closer, allowing Xingjie’s hands to rest around your waist as you cup his face in your hands. You force yourself to stay pressed against him, against the man you are sure you love.

And then, gradually, his lips become warmer. And warmer. And warmer.

You open your eyes, staring into his, before breaking away.

Where pale, white skin used to be, there is now a hint of pink and color in his cheeks. Your eyes roam his face, seeing pink lips and twinkling eyes.

Is that a tear you see? You reach up, brushing it away with your thumb.

“Xingjie,” you breathe. A tear wells in your eye, threatening to spill down your cheek. “Xingjie.”

“Xinyi,” he whispers, brushing it away.

And then he kisses you again.

Around you, the drapes blow open, the music begins to play again, and chattering begins to fill the room. But you don’t notice, focused only on the man whose heart you have melted.

“I love you,” you sigh against his lips.

He breaks away for just a second, just enough to say, “I love you too.”

#idolproducernet #idol producer #idol producer zhu xingjie #zhu xingjie #fluff #angst #royalty!au #idol producer scenarios #zhu xingjie scenarios #gramarie entertainment #a heart of ice #scriptura-adrepticius

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scriptura-adrepticius · 7 years ago

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First Kiss - Zhu Xingjie

LINAAA 😭 you already know that xingjie owns my ass right? could you write me a first kiss xingjie imagine? it can go however you’d like because you’re amazing. i love you lots. make sure to get your 8 hours of sleep, babe ❤️

PSA @yanjuniverse is a lovely being thanks and bye

Pairing: Zhu Xingjie x reader

Genre: fluff, domestic!au, drabble

Word Count: 1k

Xingjie is such a gorgeous and beautiful human that you can’t believe he hasn’t had his first kiss yet.

Masterlist | Drabbles

laughing huba is the best huba (i nearly typed buha askdjgh)

Dating isn’t really a new experience for you. You’ve dated several guys before, though none of the relationships ever lasted more than a couple months.

But though you’ve dated before, you’ve never kissed before.

That was the reason for one of your breakups, actually. The guy wanted to kiss you, but you refused, citing the fact that you wanted to wait to make sure he was actually the one. It’s kind of stupid, because you never really know who’s right and who isn’t, but still, you didn’t want to kiss him.

Thank god you didn’t, because he stormed off in an offended huff afterward and didn’t talk to you again after that.

You roll your eyes.

Jerk.

“What are you thinking about?” Xingjie asks, startling you out of your thoughts as a slow smile spreads across your face.

Xingjie. Your current boyfriend.

He’s ever so sweet and kind and loving, a sharp contrast to the impression you got when you first met him. Then, he’d seemed so cold and unapproachable, but after seeing the aftermath of Linkai calling him Huba, that image had been shattered.

You’ve known him for two years and have dated him for six months, which is longer than any of your other relationships. And though you’re careful not to say it out loud just yet, you think you might love him.

Xingjie has never hidden the fact that he’s in love with you. His confession had included those three words that carry so much weight. But what really made you want to date him was the fact that he understood when you said you couldn’t say those words back just yet.

It’s those kinds of things that he does that make you think you’re in love.

“Just one of my dumb exes,” you reply, leaning into his shoulder as he toys around with your fingers in his lap.

“Why were you thinking about your ex?” he asks, frowning a little.

You smile a little wider, poking at his face. “Smile, Huba,” you tease, eliciting a resigned pout from him. “I was just thinking that… uh…” You blush.

“What?” Xingjie probes, looking at you curiously. “Thinking what?”

You cough. “It’s embarrassing.”

“You calling me Huba is embarrassing, but I let you do it anyway,” he points out.

Your cheeks are red now, but you can’t deny the truth of his words. “Fine. I was thinking that… even though I’ve dated before, I’ve never… um… I’ve never kissed anyone before.”

Xingjie laughs, removing the hands that now cover your blushing face. “Really? You haven’t?”

“Why do you sound so surprised?” you ask, confused. “Did you expect that I’d been kissed before?”

This time it’s Xingjie’s turn to blush, but you continuously prod his cheeks until he responds. “No, uh… it’s just that… you’re beautiful, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you had been kissed before.”

“Oh my god.” You hug Xingjie closer to you, letting him run a hand through your hair. “You’re so sweet.”

“If it makes you feel better, I haven’t been kissed before either,” he blurts out.

“What?!”

You’re pretty sure you’re more surprised than he was.

“What?” Xingjie defends, his cheeks pinking.

“I just- I never expected- you’re- Jesus-” you sputter, your mind a mess.

Your gorgeous boyfriend has never been kissed before?

“But you’re so handsome!” you finally protest. “Are you lying to me?”

“Why would I ever lie?”

Well, you can’t argue with that. So you just shut your mouth, still amazed.

“So, potentially, if we kissed, we’d be each other’s first kisses?” you finally mumble after a few minutes of silence.

“I think that’s the definition of a first kiss,” Xingjie deadpans. You scowl, swatting at his face. “Shut up.”

“If you kiss me, I will,” he teases, delighting in the way your cheeks heat up.

“Stop it!” you complain.

“Never!” Xingjie laughs, starting to tickle you. You screech and laugh, thrashing around on his bed as you attempt to get away. In your crazed movements, you somehow roll off the (thankfully) low bed, taking Xingjie down with you.

He continues to tickle you, leaving you squealing for mercy, until he finally relents, his hands coming to a stop at your waist. You gasp out a few ragged laughs before realizing just how close yours and Xingjie’s faces are.

Your gaze involuntarily drops down to his lips and you swallow, forcing yourself to look into his eyes again.

Only to find his eyes are fixated on your lips as well.

As though in a trance, Xingjie slowly inches his face forward. Frozen, you make no move to stop him.

And then there’s a feather soft touch to your lips, as soft as a pillow. Only it isn’t a pillow.

It’s Xingjie’s lips.

You feel his hesitancy, his unwillingness to continue unless you give him some sort of signal that it’s okay, so you jerk yourself out of your daze to return the kiss, pressing against his lips ever so slightly to tell him that yes, it’s okay.

His lips move on yours, gentle and sweet, allowing you to feel just how much he loves you. You sigh into the kiss, melting into his grip as one hand comes up to cup his cheek.

When you finally break away, you’re dazed, unsure if that really just happened. Your face is hot, and you can only imagine how red you are.

Xingjie is no better. The cool and composed boyfriend you’ve come to know has disappeared, replaced by a blushing mess that can barely look you in the eyes.

“Oh my god,” you say dumbly. “We just kissed.”

“Yeah.”

I have such an intelligent boyfriend.

“Sorry,” he says embarrassedly, sitting up against the bed. “I, uh, got caught up in the moment and I know that you wanted to save your first kiss until you knew for sure so I’m sorry, sorry-”

You push yourself up, laughing a little at his ramblings. “It’s okay, Xingjie. I’d rather it have been you than anyone else.”

“But still-”

You shut him up by pressing your lips against his.

“I love you,” you murmur, breaking away. “Only a noble idiot like you would worry about being someone’s first kiss.”

The hot blush on his cheeks is extremely noticeable.

#idol producer #idol producer zhu xingjie #xingjie #zhu xingjie #fluff #drabble #domestic!au #idol producer scenarios #idol producer xingjie scenarios #zhu xingjie scenarios #xingjie scenarios #gramarie entertainment #first kiss #scriptura-adrepticius

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xukunstellation · 7 years ago

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Stuck || Xiao Gui

Title: Stuck Pairing: Reader x Xiao Gui Genre: EnemiestoLovers!AU + College!AU + fluff Word Count: 2397 Summary: During a game of truth or dare, you find yourself stuck in a closet with the person you hate the most: Xiao Gui. Warnings: Mentions of alcohol and claustrophobia

A/N: My first Xiao Gui fic! It’s taken me way too long to write for him. I love this little bub so much. Please continue to shower him with love and affection, ty. The request originally only asked to be an enemies to lovers au, but I put my own spin on it and made it into a college au as well (which I’m modeling after American standards bc that’s all I know lol). This is also the longest fic I’ve ever written so far on the blog, so definitely putting it all under the cut. Happy reading!

“Come on, (y/n)! Live a little!” your friend Zhou Rui begged you through the phone.

You were casually chilling in your dorm room hoping to finally get some relaxation time after a long day of classes. While you did manage to catch an hour or so to nap, your plans for peace were thrown away the moment your best friend Zhou Rui called you in order to convince you to go to this college party being held by one of his friends later tonight.

“You already know I’m not much of a party person,” you whined.

“It’s still better than whatever you choose to spend your Friday nights. You’re always cooped up in your room!”

“There’s nothing wrong with binge watching my favorite drama!”

You can virtually imagine him rolling his eyes at you. “It’s college, kid. You can afford to give up one Friday to have some fun. I’ll be there with you the entire time,” he reasoned.

Knowing how persistent he could be, you sighed in defeat. You guessed he was right. This week was packed with assignments, so you barely had any time for any kind of enjoyment. Maybe a party would be good for you.

“I don’t have anything to wear,” you grumbled.

“Good thing you have me as your best friend in the entire world,” he sung, hanging up the phone shortly after.

As soon as you ended the call, there was a knock on your door. Rolling out of your bed, you opened the door to find none other than Zhou Rui standing there with a triumphant grin. He casually waltzed into your room and straight to your closet in order to cultivate an outfit for you.

“I’m pretty sure I can come up with something that doesn’t make you look like a bum.”

“Wow, rude. Best friend in the entire world, my ass.”

“It’s all love, kid.”

In little to no time, Zhou Rui easily managed to match a couple of your clothing items to make a bomb outfit. Not that you had any doubt that he would. The male was a fashion model for a reason.

After the both of you were ready, the two of your trekked over to whatever fraternity house the party was being held. It was slightly difficult to figure out which house it was considering all of the fraternities were hosting parties to kick start the weekend. Thankfully, Zhou Rui is pretty smart so the two of you made it to the party within good time.

As you watched Zhou Rui bro hug the host of the party (a popular senior named Qin Fen who was graduating this year), you scanned around the crowded room to see if you could spot any other familiar faces. In the middle of the mass of dancing bodies, you saw Cai Xukun who you shared your 10 am class with. Not too far from him was Wang Ziyi who was DJing the music for the party. Near the alcohol table, you recognized the one chugging a beer keg as Lin Yanjun (oh god, you prayed for his liver). In the corner of the room, you spotted your good friend Zhu Xingjie and his friend Zhou Yanchen.

And that’s when you spotted the devil incarnate himself.

Wang Linkai. Better known as Xiao Gui.

He was standing behind Xingjie and Yanchen so you barely noticed he was there. Feeling eyes on him, he turned to look in your direction. The two of you made heated eye contact as you glared at each other. Then, Xiao Gui proceeded to mockingly blow you a giant kiss, smacking his lips obnoxiously loud. With a look of disgust, you pretended to catch his ‘kiss’ and overexaggeratedly smacked it on your ass, causing Xingjie and Yanchen to snicker at Xiao Gui who glared harder from the burn you gave him.

You rolled your eyes and made your way through the crowd to try and find your best friend. You spotted him chatting with his friend Qin Zimo, a classmate you’ve met a few times who you remembered as being quite sweet, so you were surprised to see him at a party like this. Apologizing to Zimo, you dragged Zhou Rui away.

“Rui! You didn’t tell me that he’d be here!” you huffed angrily.

“Tell you who would be here?” he asked in confusion.

You nudged your head sharply to the left. Zhou Rui followed the direction until he saw where Xiao Gui and his friends were standing. He groaned loudly.

“Seriously? Xiao Gui?” he looked at you unimpressed.

“Duh, who else?”

He shook his head and responded, “I didn’t know he’d be here. Just ignore him.”

“How can I ignore him when he’s over there just... just...”

“Just what?”

“Breathing!”

The male deadpanned. “You sound ridiculous, you know that? What’s the deal between you two anyway? The two of you hate each other’s guts for seemingly no reason.”

You crossed your arms over your chest, a frown pulling at your lips. “He’s the one that started it. The little prick is always finding ways to mess around with me and get on my nerves. He’s a huge jerk and I won’t stand for it,” you spat.

Zhou Rui gave you a thoughtful look and reasoned, “Why don’t you give the guy a chance? From what I heard from Xingjie, he’s actually not a bad person, so I’m not sure why he acts that way around you. I’m not saying you two have to be buddy-buddy or anything, but it would be nice to have you guys not try and kill each other every time you both are in the same room.”

“Me and Xiao Gui? Getting along?” you asked in pure disbelief. “Like that would ever happen. Not in a million years.”

At this point, Zhou Rui looked defeated, knowing that he wouldn’t be able to get through your stubborn self. Throwing an arm around you, he began leading you away to the other room. “Let’s go, grumpy cat. I think a game of truth or dare can make you feel better.”

The game was already in progress but no one seemed to care that you joined in midway. A few rounds in, you did feel slightly better as you laughed at all of the absurd things people were dared to do. Some guy had to call a Chinese take out place and ask if they served sushi. Another guy had to brag on weibo about how much his “milkshakes bring all the boys to the yard.” One girl was dared to depict a human life through interpretive dance (she was also very drunk, so it was an entire mess).

Much to your displeasure, you noticed Xiao Gui and his crew join in the game. Luckily, he sat all the way across from where you did. You tried your best to ignore the feeling of his eyes on you. Eventually, it was your turn to play and the asker coincidentally was Zhou Rui.

“Truth or dare, (y/n)?”

You debated in your mind for a bit before replying bravely, “Dare.”

However, you regretted your choice the moment you saw the shit-eating grin that appeared on his face.

“I dare you to be locked in a closet with Xiao Gui for the remainder of the game.”

The entire room erupted into cheers and wolf whistles at his words. Your mouth dropped open in disbelief, immediately looking towards Xiao Gui who looked a mixture between smug and pissed off.

Vowing to get revenge on Zhou Rui later, you mentally cursed at him before stomping your way into the nearby closet that was held open, not even waiting for Xiao Gui to follow you. A minute later, the male joined you in the closet. Without a second to waste, the closet door was slammed shut along with the tiny ‘click’ signalling that you were officially locked in with your worst enemy.

Fumbling around in the dark, you hovered your hands in the air near the walls to try and see if you could find a light switch. Unfortunately, the light switch was outside of the room. Stepping to the side, you bumped into a hard chest and stumbled back a little before being caught with an arm around your waist to steady you.

“Easy there, tiger. You want to be all over me that badly?”“ Xiao Gui questioned teasingly.

“Piss off,” you snapped.

You were quick to step away from him, his arm falling to rest by his side. Carefully, you slowly backed up to a wall and slid down to the floor tiredly. You heard shuffling and guessed that Xiao Gui had done the same across from you.

“I can’t believe I’m locked in here with you,” you grumbled to yourself.

You heard him scoff, “Last time I checked you’re the main reason we’re in this shit to begin with.”

“Trust me. The last thing I would ever want to do is be stuck with you. Now shut up.”

“You were the one who started talking to me first, idiot.”

“Then, stop talking to me. This’ll go by a lot faster if we pretended like we aren’t sharing the same air.”

It was silent after that except for the sounds of drunk cheering and muted music being muffled through the thick closet door. There was light breathing coming from across from you. Looks like Xiao Gui decided to utilize his time by taking a nap. Aside from that, everything in the closet was pitch black, You couldn’t see anything at all. Neither of you had your phones (Zhou Rui made sure to take them from both of you), so you didn’t know how much time was passing and you had no idea when the game would end.

You sat there quietly as you tried to distract the uneasiness that began to rise in your stomach. As far as you knew, you didn’t really have a fear of tight spaces. But there was something about not being able to see or move much that started to negatively affect you. Gripping your hands into fists, you pulled your knees up into a fetal position.

“Xiao Gui...?” you called out quietly. Seeing that he was asleep, he didn’t hear you at all. Mustering up your courage, you called out to him louder.

“Xiao Gui!”

The said male groaned in annoyance from being awakened. “First, you tell me to stop talking to you. Then, you proceed to wake me up to talk. What the hell do you want?” he complained.

“Do you think they’ll let us out soon?” you asked softly.

“How am I supposed to know? I’m just as clueless as you are,�� he answered before continuing with a mocking tone, “Why? Is little (y/n) scared of the dark?”

“...”

“...(Y/n)?”

You refused to answer him. To tell the truth, you were indeed afraid but you didn’t want to admit it to him. He wouldn’t let you hear the end of it and you don’t need that kind of torment right now. As the silence grew louder, so did the sound of your heart beating in your ears. Your body was shaking at this point.

You almost screamed in fear when you felt movement next to you, only for you to realize midway that it was Xiao Gui who was now sitting beside you. He proceeded to wrap his left arm around you and pull you tightly to his side. This was the closest you had ever been to him. He smelled of clean linen with a hint of citrus. It was a calming scent that put you slightly more at ease along with the comfort of feeling something warm around you.

“What are you doing?” you meekly said, not used to this kind of behavior coming from Xiao Gui of all people.

“It’s obvious that you’re afraid. I’m not going to sit around in silence and watch you have an entire breakdown,” he said.

His voice was surprisingly soothing and low, as if he was avoiding trying to scare you any further. You felt the presence of his hand linger in front of your face for a little before gently pressing it your cheek and wiping away a stray tear from your eye. You hadn’t realized you were crying.

You turned your head in his direction and wondered out loud, “But why? You don’t even like me.”

“I actually like you a lot.”

To say you were shocked was an understatement. Your worst enemy likes you? As in actually having feelings for you?

“That doesn’t make any sense. Why are you always acting as if you hate my guts?” you questioned.

The darkness of the closet disguised the longing look in Xiao Gui’s eyes. “That’s a good question. I didn’t mean to be like this. When I first realized I liked you, I was completely confused as to how to deal with these feelings. I’ve never liked someone like this before. I panicked, so my reaction was to act like a jerk in order to get your attention. Unfortunately, that plan backfired on me.”

“No shit, Sherlock.”

He chuckled sadly, “Yeah, I deserved that one. When we get out of here, you can go back to ignoring me. I won’t bother you anymore now that I know you practically despise me.”

You didn’t realize it yourself but your body had subconsciously leaned on Xiao Gui’s shoulder the entire time he was talking. There was something about the gentle way that he held you and was talking to you that made you feel comfortable and most importantly... safe. In his arms, you felt safe.

“You know... you could have just came up and talked to me. I would have given you a chance,” you stated matter-of-factly.

He seemed to think this over before replying, “Well... I’m talking to you now. Is that offer still available?”

You hummed in response, “Take me on a few dates and we’ll see from there.”

The sound of the door unlocking reached your ears, followed by the blinding colors of fluorescent lights as the door opened. There were more wolf whistles and cheering from behind Zhou Rui, who stood at the door with an I-told-you-so face. Rolling your eyes, you stood up and exited the closet with Xiao Gui’s arm slung over your shoulder. You had a feeling you’d be stuck with him for much longer than you think.

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nine-prcnt · 7 years ago

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because it’s your last

part two to as if it’s your last

these were supposed to be together but woops! i hit the max text blocks on the first part 😬😬

not a request again, just for my enjoyment i guess even though my heart died a little while i wrote it but sure

word count ; 1,552

genre ; angst

pairing ; poor!zhu xingjie x rich!reader

au ; prestigious school

part one // part two

The room was warm, a sickening mix of heat and the scent of flowers, an almost direct contrast to the lifeless cold of the outside winter. In the center, lying on the bed was you. You had been toying with the bed covers before he walked in. He was as beautiful as the last time you saw him.

Plump, porcelain skin and cool, dark eyes to match his messy black hair. If anything he reminded you of the season you were in right now, a cold beauty.

He took his place in the seat next to your bed. Rightfully, you couldn’t help but think.

His eyes seemed to avoid you, only snapping to focus on you when you covered his hand with yours.

‘Hi.’ Your eyes searched his for a small tell, anything. Although it was everything but his eyes that gave him away.

He didn’t say anything back to you.

‘You achieved it, your dream. I’m so proud.’

He stared hopelessly at you, as if he had nothing and finally he showed some signs that you existed, clasping your hands.

‘I’m sorry.’

There was stunned silence on your part, only your intertwining breaths filling the space.

‘What are you sorry for? If anyone is sorry, it’s me. We should have had our eventual reunion under better circumstances but better to have it than never.’

He didn’t smile and kept his gaze cast down. You caressed his cheek, guiding his head up.

‘You’ve accomplished so much in such a short amount of time. I remember you had the natural talent but now it’s skill that you have as well. I’ve always been in awe of you and that feeling has only increased with time.’

He met your eyes, only for a moment but for you, it was a lifetime that ended too quickly. He stood up, pacing the room and you saw him trying to collect himself, his thoughts and everything he wanted to say to you before it was too late because this time at least, he had a chance to make things right.

‘I’m sorry for all those things I said. I’m sorry that that was the last time and although I didn’t know it, I should have been more careful and treasured you.

‘I’m sorry for all of my insecurities and giving them the shape of you. Im sorry that I wasn’t good enough for you and that it’s taken me so long to say all of this, but there is one thing I know for certain and can say with confidence.

‘Everytime I look out onto a crowd, I look for you. I search for those eyes that never seemed to tire of me . I look for the lips that knew exactly how to tell me everything without a single words passing through them.

‘Let me tell you, there were so many times I thought I saw you. I-’

‘You did Xing. I couldn’t stay away. I was at every fanmeet and concert, no matter how small.’

‘Then why didn’t you just-’

‘He loves me, I knew that if I- if we- we would just try to pick right back up where we left off and I couldn’t do that to him. He’s a good man, I just couldn’t bring myself to be unfaithful to him in body as well as in mind.’

Silence overtook you both again. It was easier now though. He understood. You knew that much.

‘Were you happy?’

‘I was. I am, right now.’

He leaned over you, pressing his lips to the top of your head.

And as he turned away to make his exit, you grabbed his hand, entwining your fingers like all those years ago.

‘Sing me a song please.’ It’s one thing to hear his voice amongst thousands and thousands of people, but it’s another to have him just for you.

He sighed, defeated. How could he say no, to you of all people and in these circumstances?

But once again, you couldn’t finish your sentence and hid the words that would poison the atmosphere.

Because it will be your last.

The funeral was long over and your parents had been gone for half an hour but they stayed, gazes still fixed on the freshly filled grave and the rectangle of disturbed dirt.

The two of them stood together in silence.

There was so much to be said, yet no one was saying anything. Without a single shared glance, they turned and left, going their own ways.

It wasn’t until the following spring and you in the ground for a year. The two of them met by chance in a coffee shop. Xukun invited Xingjie to sit with him and although he was in middle of working on his next album, he couldn’t say no.

History began to repeat itself with them sitting in silence, staring into the rapidly cooling coffees.

‘I saw you last month.’

Xingjie looked up.

‘At her grave.’

‘Oh.’

He felt guilty now. He didn’t know why but something gnawed at his heavy heart.

‘I’m glad you were there. I’m sure that she enjoyed the company.’

Xingjie didn’t know what compelled him to say what he said next but he did.

‘I try to go as often as I can. Make up for lost time, I don’t know.’

Xukun nodded. He knew the situation, he could understand what Xingjie meant.

‘But she was always helpful when I would write, just her being there was enough.’

Xukun looked at this man in front of him. He seemed cold, as he always had but when he spoke of you there was a sudden gentility to his words and moves. It made Xukun happy, that even after all that time neither of you forgot each other in your hearts.

‘Y/n was always talking about you. Blasting your songs around the house and dancing along.’

They laughed together, the image of you prancing around in their minds.

‘They were terrible at dancing.’

‘Oh yeah. I tried to teach them a long time ago and that didn’t go too well.’

The air around them was warm again. Not from the hot aroma of coffee or the people that sat in the booths around them, but from them, their familiarity with you and the endearing memories they had of you.

‘You know, I actually went to your last concert.’

‘Really?’

‘Yeah, I had never been before. Y/n liked to go alone.’

Xingjie hummed a response.

‘It was really good. I honestly didn’t know what to expect but I had a lot of fun. It’s a bit embarrassing to admit but I actually know all of the fan chants for your songs.’

A shy smile crept onto Xukun’s face and the tips of his ears were pink.

‘Really? Did you cheer along?’

‘Maybe.’

‘Thanks, that means a lot.’

Xukun furrowed his brows slightly, drawing a crease between them. Xingjie caught the expression.

‘I just-‘ He sighed.

‘Hearing the crowd is one of my favourite things about doing music. I’ve always wanted to be able to support myself and my life with music, so it’s the people who those voices belong to that allow me to do that. They mean the most to me. I’m living my dream because of them.’

Xukun understood now, exactly what you had seen in Xingjie, aside from his handsome exterior. He had an attractive heart, filled with compassion and loyalty. He never seemed insincere but it was visible, the change that came over him when he spoke of things he loved.

‘Well, I’ll be happy to go to another and I will make sure to cheer loudly.’

Xingjie broke out into a pleased smile, trying to hide it by sipping on his drink.

They exchanged stories of you and talked about what they had done with themselves until their cups were empty and the murmur of people calmed.

The tree on the corner was dark against the white sun. Its branches were filled with buds ready to burst and decorate the tree.

‘You know there were times that I couldn’t sleep because she would be tossing and turning and the only name on her lips, while she slept and when she woke up, was yours. I hope you know how much she loved you and how lucky you are to have had a love like that.’

‘I do. She shouldn’t have even known me but she spoke to me, got to know me and for that time, I have been and will be eternally grateful.’

There was a silence now between them, and like the winter winds had stolen you away, the spring breeze thawed the cold hearts of the men who loved you.

‘She loved you too. Maybe she didn’t love us in the same way, but you meant too much to her that she didn’t try and come back to me. She couldn’t bear to hurt you, and if that doesn’t say something, I don’t know what will.’

They stood on the pavement for another moment.

‘I’m actually working on my album right now. If you’re free, do you want to join me?’

A slow nod and the men left, finding the company they had been missing for a year now and the pieces of you that you had left in each of them.

woot. this is done! im kind of surprised that i managed to actually write this bcos usually when i get ideas, they don’t usually get finished. i hope you guys liked this! it’s a bit shorter than the first part but tbh i wasn’t planning on having two parts but i wrote too much hehe c:

-kee

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