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smolwritingchick · 9 months ago

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The Bangtan Gal Chapter 91- Tub Big Enough For Two

Chapter Summary: BTS promote BST as viewers and fans freak out and wonder what is going on between Jennie and Taehyung due to what they saw in the MV. Jennie suffers a wardrobe malfunction during a show. Jennie and Jungkook become stressed trying to juggle school and promotions. Pissed about having to take an exam the next morning, Jungkook's angry emotions are shown while performing late at night for a show and Jennie helps him calm down back at the dorm.

Words: 8,000+

Author's Note: Years ago, when I saw that fan cam of Jungkook on October 18th 2016 it inspired the last part of this chapter. I really love it and thought it was super cute and fluffy. I hope you enjoy! It'll take me a bit to write the next chapter after this but I hope this chapter can hold you until I update this story again!

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At the music show, Jennie wore one of her outfits from the music video and had a personalized earpiece. Her earpiece had Smartie written on it with two small drawings of Smarties under it. What excited Jen about performing BST was that for her verse, she would be able to switch up the choreography and switch it with a different member. For their comeback stage, Taehyung would be the first. And then on another day, it would be another member instead. She hoped viewers would enjoy it as it kept the performance fresh and improvised.

Jennie and Jungkook got to reunite with GOT7 when they weren’t recording. Jumping on Bam Bam’s back, she outstretched her arms like an airplane while Jungkook picked up Yugyeom on his back. Mark laughed as he started taking photos on Bam Bam’s phone which consisted of them laughing and doing funny faces for each one. Jackson and Namjoon even photobombed a few with funny facial expressions of their own. When Bam Bam noticed, he laughed and showed it to his 97 Liner friends.

After getting the photo from Bam Bam, she posted the photo on Twitter and Instagram with the caption, ‘Reunited~! Squad! Missing the rest of the 97 Liner gang’

As the music show went on, Bangtan did a mini fan meeting as fans with Army bombs screamed for them while SHINee’s Key and GOT7’s Bam Bam were the MCs.

“Alright, these people who have set the music industry on fire with HwaYangYeonHwa have properly announced their declaration to soar this time! BTS!” Key announced.

“2! 3! Bang-Tan! Hello, we are BTS!”

“Could you please introduce your second full album, WINGS for us?” Bam Bam asked the group.

“Yes, our second full album, WINGS, consists of 16 tracks and we can say it is an album full of dark, dark, sexy, sexy charms that you have never seen from us before!” Suga answered as some fans covered their faces with the WINGS album and waved away their Bangtan Bomb in the background.

“Alright, we heard that your concept this time is boy meets temptations and so we have investigated what temptations each of the members have met. Bam Bam?” Key asked.

“Jungkook, who has turned 20 years old this year has indeed met sexiness properly!” he announced as Jungkook smiled at the camera and raised an eyebrow. “I am also 20 years old this year but I don’t know why I haven’t met sexiness. So please show us some sexiness in element!”

“You want me to show you?” Jungkook asked.

“Yes!”

Grabbing onto his belt, Jungkook body rolled and bit his bottom lip as fans ate it up, screaming. J-Hope dropped his jaw and then placed an arm over Bam Bam’s shoulder, body rolling with him. Watching the duo join Jungkook in body rolls, Jennie stared at them like they were crazy.

“Woah, woah, woah! Please stop!” Key exclaimed.

“Y’all are clowns,” she laughed.

“That was great, alright. But Jin, is this the end?” Key asked.

“Of course not! Rap Monster and I, the outer wings of dance in BTS, have met our temptations from dancing! We shall show you the choreography point of Blood, Sweat and Tears!” he answered.

“Now, 5, 6, 7, 8!” J-Hope counted as they watched them perform a small section of the dance. “That was just fantastic!” he praised with Jungkook.

“Everyone, that is not the choreography point. The 95 liners, who have met temptations from both sexiness and dance will show you the choreography point move properly!” Jimin spoke up.

“The friends who were born in ’95!” Key said.

“Yup! 5, 6, 7, 8!” J-Hope counted down again as they danced with Jin singing the chorus.

“Jennie has shown an enticing persona that has captured the hearts of many fans. What temptations have you encountered?” Bam Bam asked.

She stood there, pondering for a moment after taking the mic. Then she suddenly took out a handful of Smarties from her pocket. “Smartie galore~!”

The boys laughed with her as she dramatically presented the candy on screen. She turned around and gave some to a few lucky fans. When some asked her to throw some in the back, she tossed the rest.

“If you watch M Countdown’s live broadcast, the temptation of revealing it for the first time, what temptations are there to this, Jennie?” Key asked her.

Holding the mic as she stood next to Suga, she pointed out the signed BTS WINGS album he was holding. “If you watch the broadcast, you could win a signed copy of our new album! All you gotta do is take a picture of the live broadcast on your screen and mention it to M Countdown Twitter! So, tweet away!”

“Jennie, I want to watch your performance of Blood, Sweat and Tears now and get the signed CD!” Bam Bam pointed out.

“Woah, woah, before you watch our performance stage of our title track, aren’t you curious about the temptations that I, J-Hope have encountered?” he asked. “These days I’m into the temptations of elegant and gleaming women~. Yeah~.”

“BTS’ first comeback stage of 21st century girl will be revealed for the first time, very soon and if you continue to watch the live broadcast after that you will be able to meet our title track as well!” Jungkook pointed to the camera.

“Before that, the first revealing performance of the most mystic ones, Ladies Code!” Rapmon announced.

“And Monsta X’s stage too, M Countdown-“

“Let’s go, let’s go!” they all shouted and jumped around.

-----

For the recording of 21st Century Girl, as the group got into formation, the audience began to loudly sing Happy Birthday to Jimin which warmed Jennie’s heart. He grinned and bowed before sending fans a heart. Throughout the entire performance, she had a big smile on her face, clearly indicating that this was if not her favorite song out of the album.

As the broadcast went on, it was finally time to perform Blood, Sweat & Tears. The setting BTS was in looked similar to how it was in the music video as Jennie's demeanor turned into work mode and her expression turned serious. Getting into her BST persona, she stood in the back for the opening pose.

As Jimin’s ethereal vocals started off the song,

nae pi ttam nunmul

They raised their heads to looked at the ceiling and then down,

nae majimak chumeul

da gajyeoga ga

They moved smoothly on beat as fans screamed.

nae pi ttam nunmul

Covering their eyes, they began to hip thrust. For this, Jen chose to place her hand on her thigh while the others either had their hand on their belt or crotch. As they swayed their arms fluidly, the crowd fan chanted their names.

Kim Namjoon! Kim Seokjin! Min Yoongi! Jung Hoseok! Park Jimin! Kim Taehyung! Jeon Jungkook! Jen Walker! BTS!

nae pi ttam nunmuldo

nae mom maeum yeonghondo

neoye geoshin geol jal algo isseo

igeon nareul beolbatge hal jumun

Peaches and cream

Sweeter than sweet

Getting on a knee on the floor, she body rolled sensually looking right directly at the camera.

Chocolate cheeks

And chocolate wings

But neoye nalgaeneun akmaye geot

neoye geu sweet apen bitter bitter

Kiss me apado dwae

eoseo nal joyeojwo

deo isang apeul sudo eopge

Baby chwihaedo dwae ije neol deurikyeo

mok gipsugi neoran wiseuki

nae pi ttam nunmul

She slowly let herself fall on the floor and turned on her back, thrusting up.

nae majimak chumeul

da gajyeoga ga

nae pi ttam nunmul

With a sexy smile, she began to caress her body as her hands went down slowly.

nae chagaun sumeul

da gajyeoga ga

wonhae mani mani mani mani

wonhae mani mani mani mani mani mani

wonhae mani mani mani mani

wonhae mani mani mani mani mani mani

As she sang, the boys rushed in close and crowded around her. They body rolled as they had their attention on her while she stared at the camera instead. Every day she was finding more ways to improve on this sexy persona she was told to do for this comeback. Her appearances weren’t enough, so she chose to do what she did best and make the camera her best friend.

“How much longer before you consume me? No matter how much I resist, I can’t fight what you’re doing,”

Looking behind her and then back at the crowd, she snapped her fingers and everyone dropped to the floor except for V.

Staring at her with desire, he had a playful smirk on his face and got behind her. Covering her eyes and having his other hand hold onto her securely, they lean to the side.

“My mind is telling me to break free but my body is freaking out. No, I can’t want you, get out of my head. As you love every inch of me you see that I want it too.”

Once he removed his hand from her eyes, she felt his breath on her neck.

“Breath on my neck, I bit off more than I can chew. Reflecting on my choices, I’m wonderin’ if there’s any way out of this,"

Once she turned her head back to look at him, he leaned in close like he was going to kiss her, hence loud screaming occurring. She pushed him away and turned her attention back to the crowd, to dance.

"I’m losing this battle, I just can’t resist. Only a matter of time before you screw me up and I’ll be stuck reminiscing,” she covered her mouth and joined the rest of the group who got up as J-Hope rapped his verse.

apado dwae nal mukkeojwo

naega domangchil su eopge

kkwak jwigo nal heundeureojwo

naega jeongshin mot charige

Kiss me on the lips lips

dulmane bimil

neoran gamoge jungdokdwae gipi

niga anin dareun saram seomgiji mothae

almyeonseodo samkyeobeorin dogi deun seongbae

nae pi ttam nunmul

nae majimak chumeul

da gajyeoga ga

nae pi ttam nunmul

nae chagaun sumeul

da gajyeoga ga

wonhae mani mani mani mani

wonhae mani mani mani mani mani mani

wonhae mani mani mani mani

wonhae mani mani mani mani mani mani

As V stood in front of the camera to sing, Suga reached for his neck while J-Hope grabbed his wrist on the other side.

nareul budeureopge jugyeojwo

The trio bent down to reveal Jungkook with Rapmon and Jennie covering his eyes along with theirs.

neoye songillo nun gamgyeojwo

As everyone bent down to reveal Jin in the back, he sang his lines, ducking over Jen and Rapmon’s hands.

eochapi geobuhal sujocha eopseo

deoneun domanggal sujocha eopseo

niga neomu dalkomhae neomu dalkomhae

neomu dalkomhaeseo

nae pi ttam nunmul

nae pi ttam nunmu

After their ending pose, the lights went out and the audience cheered loudly.

Once the staff announced the recording was over, Jennie’s excited sound effect and “Woo! That was hot! We did it!” was heard which made everyone laugh.

“Whoops, I thought my mic was off,” she giggled and took off her earpiece.

-------

After their recording, in the dressing room, Jennie and Jin prepared the cake. They were recorded for a Bangtan Bomb to surprise Jimin for his birthday.

“Fancy packaging,” she commented as they carefully opened the box.

After setting it up, Jungkook lit up the candles while their manager went to call Jimin back into the room.

“Oh! Ya, that looks delicious!” Hobi said.

With the lights off and Jin holding the cake while V had flowers in his hand, “Happy birthday to you!” everyone sang while Jennie jumped and clapped around with Hobi.

“Happy birthday to you! Our dear Park Jimin! Happy birthday to you!”

“Blow!” Jin presented the cake in front of him.

With a big smile, Jimin happily blew out the candles.

“Look at this! Your dad sent it to you,” V presented him with the flowers.

“Wow, my dad is daebak!” Jimin said and took the flowers.

“To show how much he loves you,” Suga joined in the conversation.

Jimin pointed out that the cake was the same cake he bought Rap Monster when he spent his first birthday with him. The cake was even meaningful.

“Also the members individually bought you presents,” J-Hope told him.

“YEAAAAAAH~!” the birthday boy shouted.

After they celebrated with cake, Jen saw that Jimin had finished recording for a Bangtan Bomb to talk about how grateful he was for the birthday wishes. She thought it was the best time to give him her gift.

“Happy birthday~!” she sat next to him, holding a photo album in her hands. “Thank you for being born and being such an amazing soul. This is for you! I made it myself. Remember I asked you for all the Polaroids you’ve taken over the years? This is what I was working on,”

When he opened it, he saw that all his polaroids were in a collection by date. It had captions of the memories along with some stories she had written as she thought about the memories BTS has had so far.

“Oh wow...Ennie, this is...wow,” he said breathlessly as he was in awe at the gift.

Her nervousness for his reaction went away when she saw how thrilled he was. “I’m glad you like it!”

"Thank you,” he set it down and pulled her in for a hug. “This is beautiful. I’ll cherish it for a long time,”

Back at the dorm, Jimin took the time to look over the entire album. He looked at the polaroid of her, Jin, and him spending the day together during their trainee days.

‘Remember when you and Jin took me to this Korean BBQ place? You guys made me try out so many things. We should go back there sometime!’

At the end of the album, he noticed there were five custom themed Jennie Bakery coupons for whenever he wanted her baked goods.

‘Anything baked for you is on me! Just hand me the coupon! :)’

Grabbing one of the coupons, Jimin made his way to her room.

Jennie felt a gentle hand on her shoulder while she was seated at her desk on her computer. Glancing at the coupon, she smiled and looked up to see Jimin smiling warmly.

“I could use some of your cookies, right now,” he said kindly.

“You got it, birthday boy,” she stood up.

“Could I...bake with you? I don’t want you to do all the work,”

“Sure! Let’s do it,”

---------

For another Bangtan Bomb, dressed in her BST outfit in the dressing room, Jennie held baby Jordan, bouncing in beat as Bang Bang Bang by Big Bang came on shuffle from her phone. She was listening to music to pass the time while the rest of the members got ready.

‘Jennie feeling the energy of Big Bang while holding baby Jordan’

As she danced around to TOP’s rap, Hobi, who was done getting ready came to join her in dancing.

BANG! BANG BANG!

Standing next to him, she held Jordan securely against her chest with one arm and with the other, moved her arm around to perform the choreography of the chorus.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

Ppangya ppangya ppangya

BANG! BANG! BANG!

After dancing, Jen was asked to explain why she had a baby with her since fans would be curious why a baby toy was going everywhere with Bangtan.

Seated on the couch, with Jordan in her arms, she explained, “Jungkook and I are in a class where we have an assignment to take care of a baby. We named him Jordan. It’s kinda funny because taking care of this robot baby is like a sims game but in baby toy form. I hope we pass. So far it’s been smooth sailing. But apparently, it’s supposed to get harder as the assignment’s due date approaches. The teacher is very strict about making sure everyone does well on this project. Cheer us on, please,“

When Namjoon and Suga asked to play with the baby, Jungkook sat on the couch with Jennie and watched the rappers play around. Their fingers were intertwined as they sat comfortably while amused at the pair playing around with Jordan.

“Let’s teach Jordan how to rap. The ninth member of Bangtan. Baby Jordan, right here, and he about to be on the next rap line song!” Suga shouted proudly.

“I love! I love! I love myself!” the rappers began rapping the song to Jordan.

Sensing the Bangtan Bomb camera turning towards them, Jungkook quickly removed his hand from hers. They both scooted away to avoid looking too close for comfort in the nick of time as the camera caught them casually watching the two rap. Although it could just be edited, they still didn’t want to take any chance since ARMY is like the FBI these days.

“What are y’all doing?” Jen exclaimed as the camera caught the Golden Duo staring at them like they were crazy.

"I'm surprised Jordan hasn't cried. Maybe he likes it," Jungkook spoke up.

"Shit, you could be right," she replied as they heard the baby robot laugh.

------

With WINGS out, fan signs began for Bangtan as Jennie was met with the most common questions on whether she was dating V and what color she would be dyeing her hair next.

‘IS THIS REAL!? Did he really say this!?’

‘IT’S REAL GUYS! It is from today’s fan sign! He answered this for a fan!’

‘Taehyung and Jennie cannot be left alone in a room together no more. I don’t trust it!’

‘I knew something was up with the way they were staring at each other at music shows’

‘I’m maaaaaad as helllll rn. Why can’t it be me!?’

‘I lowkey be replaying THAT scene on the low because there is just no way that was acting’

‘PAUSE! The music video’s rating was supposed to be higher!?’

‘They were supposed to KISS!? I WANT TO SEE IT!’

‘Jennie! V! Explain yourselves!’

‘I’m amazed by their acting abilities to do what they did in front of the staff for the MV. I could never.’

‘All right dispatch, reveal that they’re dating! We waiting for that article’

‘Missed opportunity to kiss. BH made a mistake!’

‘I still have this image of Jennie being a baby. She’s acting sexy too quickly. Slow down PLEASE! I can’t handle this!’

‘Now I want them to kiss. Dammit Big Hit! Y’all dropped the ball!’

‘Imnotjealousimnotjealousimnotjealous’

‘I just want to know HOW she survived that scene because there is just no way,’

‘Can somebody please confirm if they’re dating or not because I cannot get over this’

‘Confirmed! Taennie is too hot for music videos’

‘Big Hit fix this NOW! #LetVAndJenKiss’

‘I believe it because the way he was with her against the wall was intense and had me screaming’

‘From all the YouTube reaction videos of BST, that scene was replayed the most by viewers’

Army on Twitter was in a frenzy when a K-Fan posted Taehyung’s answer regarding scenes that did not make the cut in the music video from today’s fan sign.

The photo consisted of a written response on the note the fan provided which had Taehyung say: ‘The music video was originally supposed to be rated 12 but due to Ennie and I, it was boosted to rated 15. At one point in the music video, Ennie and I were supposed to kiss. But they chose not to do it because the rating would have been even higher for the video. Kekeke’

---------

Backstage after recordings, BTS sat to watch their performances of 21st Century Girl and Blood, Sweat & Tears. Jennie took Jungkook’s seat next to Yoongi when he decided to stand behind the group with Hobi.

21st Century Girl was being shown and they commented on how good they looked.

“Look at me working hard!” Yoongi pointed out.

“V knows what’s good,” Rapmon said as he watched V in the front during the chorus.

“I love this song, oh my gosh,” Jen giggled as she watched herself dance around with Yoongi. She swayed a little to the beat.

“You and Yoongi had a lot of fun on this stage,” Jin noticed.

“They really did,” Rapmon chuckled.

“Jimin’s acting here is really good,” Jungkook said.

“Doesn’t he act well?”

Jimin laughed. “I’m going crazy over Rap Monster,”

“I didn’t know my eyes were that big until today,” Rapmon went on.

“Music Core always captures us nicely on camera,” Hobi praised. “The colors are so pretty,”

“It’s our first time watching our performance on TV,” Jin said as Blood, Sweat & Tears came on.

“Oh boy,” Jennie grinned nervously as she watched herself. She also analyzed how she moved so she could improve for their next performances.

“The set is really pretty,” Hobi looked on.

The boys started to tease Jimin about having a motor on his body with the way he moved and that Jungkook couldn’t imitate his movements.

“Of all the outfits he wore, this suits Jimin the best, I think,” Rapmon pointed.

“Agreed. This is definitely his era,” Jen praised.

When they saw his shoulder showing after his jacket slid off a little, the members laughed and pointed it out.

“His clothes came off! He’s showing off his body~!” Hobi shouted.

“Here he gooooooo~.” Jennie threw her head back, laughing with him.

“He practiced it all,” Jin declared.

“No, no~!” Jimin giggled and leaned forward.

“I think we should focus. Suga said he came out great on this performance,” Hobi changed the subject.

“Jennie~! Look at you go!” Rap Monster cheered.

“You’re growing up too fast for me,” Jin joked. “Are you trying to make ARMY nervous?”

“Perhaps,” she grinned sheepishly.

“Jennie’s expressions are no joke,” Suga said in amazement.

“Oh my gosh, I don’t remember making that face,” she pointed out as she watched herself sing.

Watching his girlfriend on the screen, Jungkook smirked softly and raised an eyebrow, taking in how good she looked.

“Jungkook’s outfit is very...” Jimin tried to think of the right word.

“It makes him look like an adult,” Rapmon answered

“He’s like an adult. It looks really sexy on him,”

‘You can say that again. How lucky am I? Whew,’ Jen thought as she bit her bottom lip softly, staring harder than usual at the screen when Jungkook appeared.

Once they saw Jimin back on the screen again, they watched as he did his shoulder accident once more, which caused them to go crazy.

“WOW~!”

“YASSSSSS!” she clapped.

-------

For SBS Inkigayo, BTS performed BST in a different stage setting. As soon as Rapmon said Peaches and Cream, Jennie felt a few buttons from her top pop off, revealing more cleavage than she wanted as she heard fans scream at the unexpected exposed skin and bra.

‘Nice...frickin’ nice...’ she thought as she professionally continued to dance while keeping a tight grip on her top.

After getting up from the floor, she was forced to dance with one hand.

Jin immediately noticed what was wrong when something in his gut told him to glance over at her. And there she was with a wardrobe malfunction. The audience screamed louder when they watched him take off his red jacket. As she desperately gripped her shirt to block her chest from being seen, Jin improvised their dance by having his red jacket in his hands to give to her.

“How much longer before you consume me?” she sang as she felt him place his jacket over her.

Putting her arms in it, her chest was now covered as she wore his jacket for the rest of the performance. It felt warm and it was pretty large on her. She was grateful.

Smiling, she caressed his cheek to go back along with their choreography. Gently pushing her hand away, he looked ahead like he was trying to go to the other side. Watching him walk past her where the rest of the boys were, she rushed up and hugged him from behind.

After the performance was over, Jennie was quick to rush backstage with Jin following behind her as they went to the dressing room.

“Is she all right? What happened?” Rapmon asked with concern as the rest of the members went into full protection mode to get to the bottom of what was wrong.

“That was embarrassing,” Jen cringed as her entire face was on fire from the sudden moment. Feeling angry about the situation, some tears went down her cheeks.

Hobi and Jin stood in front of her, trying to calm her down.

“Don’t do that. Don’t cry. It’s okay, Jennie,” Hobi cupped her face after Jin told him what happened. He used his thumbs to wipe her tears. “None of this was your fault. You’ve done so well, today. This hiccup will not overshadow that. You hear me, munchkin?“

She nodded and felt him kiss her forehead.

“I brought smarties to cheer you up,” Jin presented her with a bag, making her eyes light up. He always brought some with him just in case.

“Guys...thank you. And Jin, I owe you. What you did with your jacket, thank you. I appreciate you so much for what you did out there,”

“You said you wanted to be my daughter for a long time. I too want you as my daughter for a long time. I’ll always be here to protect you,” he blew her a flying kiss. “You know what? I recall this dad joke I heard a while ago. You know what it was?”

“What was it?”

“What kind of cheese can never be yours?”

“Um...not sure. What is it?”

“Nacho cheese!” he laughed.

She didn’t know if it was the dad joke or his infectious laugh that caused her to burst out in laughter but whatever it was, she was feeling better already.

“There’s that smile! Yay~!” Hobi jumped up and down with Jin.

Once the rest of the boys came in, they were told what happened and saw that Jin and Hobi boosted her mood. They were glad Jennie was doing better and kept praising her professionalism today. After the stylists had fixed her shirt and she leaned up against one of the tables, on her phone.

Jungkook lifted her chin and smiled softly when he approached her. “You all right?”

“Yes. I’m feeling better. Thank you,” she smiled.

“Wow, so we both had our shirts ripped together. How convenient,” he joked.

On this day, it seemed like the Golden Duo’s clothes couldn’t handle the performance. It looked like only one button was trying to hold on from Jungkook’s shirt as he performed. He understood that his situation was different given that he could easily reveal his chest unlike her.

“Yours was like BAM! Didn’t the arm rip, too?” she laughed as he showed her after unpinning the closed hole. “Wow, it did!”

After settling down in the dressing room, Jen tweeted. ‘Welp...#Jen’

Fans were quick to reply to express their sympathy for her:

‘Girl don’t even worry about it!’

‘She taking the sexy persona to a whole new level oml I am shooked’

‘Wait...what happened!?’

‘It’s okay! It happens to the best of us!’

‘Are you ok bby?!’

#ItsOKJennie trended after fans found out about the sudden malfunction. Even as they recorded a few times, for some reason her shirt would not function right and kept popping open. But what made their hearts soar was that Jin was the first to notice on stage and loved that he had given her his red jacket. Jin was praised all over Twitter for his quick action as fans called him a positive father figure for her.

On her Instagram, she saw a few antis coming in to express their disgust for the wardrobe malfunction.

‘What you did might be how you get famous in the West but in Korea we go based on talent. Showing your body won’t get you anywhere,’

‘Can you go a DAY without forcing your Americanness in Korea? No one wants to see your chest. Bad enough you’re all over the members on stage. It’s gross. I honestly think you planned that. There was no way that was an accident. You’re trying to be like Jimin and it’s not working. You’ll never be like him. Stop acting slutty’

'Hah...I got time today,' she thought as she decided to comment on the last one.

Jen typed, ‘Lol Bruhhhh. How come when the boys act sexy, it’s fine but when I act sexy I’m forcing my Americaness? Jeesh. I’m just trying to perform the best I can for you all. I look and feel amazing. Learn to love yourself and not be so hateful to others. With that being said, continue to support BTS and listen to WINGS’

The person deleted their comment and went private immediately, unable to take the heat of fans protecting her on social media. Dismissing the hate comments, Jen went on to stay in a positive mindset and focused on the supportive comments.

Scrolling through Twitter and Tumblr, the memes and gifs were already made from her incident which made her laugh. The K-Pop stans that enjoyed sexy moments were having a field day, trying to get any chance they could to see more sexy Jennie. What took her out was the slow-motion gifs of her top popping.

“I cannot with peopleeeee,” she laughed wholeheartedly, forgetting all about the embarrassment.

She tweeted: ‘These gif and photo reactions, y’all thirsty AF, ahahaha XD I don’t even got nothing. #Jen’

When she saw fans clowning her for not believing she had a nice chest and poked fun at her to help boost her mood, she tweeted, 'Issa whole push up bra. You know how that goes. Mistakes happen. I’m glad you find amusement in this. I do too thanks to U! #Jen'

She took the time to see a hashtag about her trending which made her heart soar. K-Pop fans really knew how to make idols feel great when they were at their lowest.

‘Thanks for the hashtag. I see it. Your tweets made my day better. I’ll be all right. Continue to support Bangtan and WINGS! I love y’all #ItsOKJennie #Jen’

-------

As promotions for Blood, Sweat & Tears continued, Jennie and Jungkook had been visibly stressed with juggling school and idol life. So, when they found out they had to record and perform at the KBS Open Concert on October 18th, the duo was not too pleased since they had exams the following day.

With no time to study due to practice and promoting? The duo was pissed.

Jennie seemed to have calmed down when she arrived at the show and saw her friends. She soon had the mindset that it was what it was and she would just have to go with the flow and do the best she could for the exam. Jungkook on the other hand was still irate and remained silent as his mind wandered to how he was going to be able to get any studying in. He even brought books to attempt to cram but did not get the opportunity to look over his notes because he was called for other tasks.

“Girl, I am going to fail tomorrow. This written exam is going to kill me,” Jen began venting to Hayoon as they walked together backstage.

“What? Why do you say that?” Hayoon asked in astonishment.

“Yoonie, they got me performing today and promoting left and right. Fan signs and I had no time whatsoever to study for this exam. I am so annoyed. You know how I am about school,”

“Oh gosh. And this is such a successful comeback for Bangtan. So more demand for you guys, huh?”

“Right? I’m so grateful for the success but it would be nice if the industry could give idol students a break to prioritize with our studies. But it seems like things don’t work that way, here. I dunno what I am going to do, girl. I’m worried about my grades,”

“Oh nooooo. And I saw Jungkook earlier. Is he all right? He kind of scared me with how visibly angry he looked tonight,”

“Oh boy. Yeah, he’s taking this situation harder than me. He is not happy. I’m trying to give him his space. I don’t want to annoy him,”

“Understandable. You think you’ll get any studying in after recording?”

“I need to. I have no choice. I’m going to have to just sacrifice sleep, tonight,”

After catching up with Hayoon, Jennie met up with BTS to prepare to perform BST and Fire. Bangtan walked on stage and got ready for their opening pose of BST. As the song began and they danced, Jungkook’s annoyance visibly showed on camera as well as looking like he wanted to be somewhere else instead of on stage. Jennie had a serious expression on her face as she performed, not even bothering to portray her trademark sexy persona for this performance. If anything, she just wanted to get this over with so she could study. She even found herself trying to think of what she had crammed for before arriving at the venue.

'Science was it? Damn it, I need to remember those formulas. Oh wait, I need to sing,’ she thought as she heard background music and saw some of the members glancing over at her when she almost missed her cue. She quickly snapped out of her thoughts and began to sing.

It was Suga’s turn to be with her for her part of the song and fans screamed louder when he came up and gently grabbed her neck. He held her close from behind as she leaned to the side. He spun her around and the pair continued to dance with one another.

“Only a matter of time before you screw me up and I’ll be stuck reminiscing,” she sang as she pressed her forehead against his.

Amused about their closeness, the two ended up smiling as they broke away and went back to their places as J-Hope rapped. As she performed, Jennie noticed familiar faces of her fansites that she met up with during her time in America. She smiled brightly at their cameras, acknowledging them. She even blew a kiss at one lucky fansite that was bound to get thousands of views alone from that moment. While hearing fans screaming and screeching out the lyrics, she couldn’t help but chuckle softly as she continued to move smoothly.

Once Fire came on, the members were hyping up the crowd. Jen glanced over at her boyfriend who was still visibly mad on stage.

'Oh boy. Fansites are going to have a field day with this,’ she thought.

ni meotdaero sareo eochapi ni kkeoya

As they leaned on one side, she locked eyes with Jungkook, initiating another nonverbal conversation.

'You good?’ she shot him a look of concern.

His eyes softened a bit as he didn’t want to take out his frustration on her. So, instead of rolling his eyes or giving her a cold response, he shook his head slightly while remaining serious on camera. The look he gave her was clear as it told her that he was still pissed about the situation they were in and that he just wanted to go home and study.

Oof. This was bad.

Whenever she glanced over at Jungkook with worry, he looked more irritated by the second as they performed. She didn’t blame him. The fact that they had to go to school after performing at this event late at night should be a crime. What she was not expecting was for him to be this angry at the situation that he would show off his emotions on stage. After the song ended, he rolled his eyes and walked off the stage. Meanwhile, Jennie hissed at the aching foot that had been bothering her all night. She had been on her feet all day and dancing in heels did not help. Once she was able to sit backstage, just keeping weight off the foot made her feel better. A massage would do the trick. And perhaps putting heat on it.

Nothing like a pair of comfortable Nikes to help as she put on a pair.

--------

The car ride back to the dorm went quickly as Jungkook silently seethed over having to cram for the exam in the morning. Once the car stopped at the dorm, he immediately got out after Jennie and Hobi did and slammed the door shut. The sound of him slamming the door made some of the members flinch.

“Jeesh, I didn’t think this was going to affect him this badly,” Hobi murmured, a little frightened at Jungkook’s demeanor.

Jennie exhaled and followed the group inside the dorm.

What do girlfriends do to help calm their angry boyfriends down, was the question on her mind as she watched her annoyed beau walk towards her bedroom door, ignoring everyone.

Jungkook turned and looked at her as if asking if she was going to follow him to her room. Once he saw that she was, he opened the door and let her go inside first.

“Leave the door open-“ Jin tried to warn but heard Jungkook shut the door after he walked inside. “Okay, but don’t lock it!”

Once he heard a click, indicating the door was locked, he sighed in annoyance while the rest laughed at him being ignored.

“Ah...let them rest. They have a long day tomorrow.” Namjoon advised.

“I hope he’s all right,” Hobi murmured.

“He will be,” Yoongi reassured. “Give the kids their space,”

“Ennie will make sure he’s fine. Let’s not bother them,” Taehyung thought positively.

“That means no knocking on their door. I fear he may get really angry at us and end up shouting or something,” Jimin added while keeping baby Jordan so they could try to study.

--------

With Jennie, she watched Jungkook lay face first into the covers. Her soft sheets made him feel comfortable as he rested, trying to control his emotions. He just wanted a moment of silence before cramming.

‘Should I give him space or...’ she pondered, not sure what to do in this situation.

She didn’t take it personally on him being in a foul mood and not wanting to speak to anyone. Everyone has their bad days. The main thing she wanted to avoid was saying the wrong thing and making him angrier. Deciding to leave him be, she went to her bathroom to set up a bubble bath. He could really use one. He had been working extremely hard during Blood, Sweat & Tears, she could only imagine how tense his muscles were tonight.

‘This’ll do for sure.’ she thought after being satisfied with the amount of bubbles in the hot water.

She put a ton of vanilla bubble bath liquid in the tub, making a bunch of bubbles. She then set up some scented candles around to enhance his relaxation. You can never go wrong with candles. When she came back to her bedroom, she found him standing up, wondering where she was.

‘Poor thing...you look so distressed.’ she thought with a sigh.

She smiled understandingly and pulled him in for a warm hug. The hug made him exhale as her arms wrapped around his waist, gently squeezing him. She felt him engulf his arms around her as she rested her head against his chest. They stood there for a while, enjoying the embrace. A hug could do so much as Jungkook’s frustrations began to melt away. The hug seemed to have started to make him feel better as Jennie felt his body relaxed. But she also noticed how tense his back was like she predicted. It began to bother her and she wanted to do something about it.

Looking up at him, she said, “Kookie, you’re tense,"

"I know...I'm just a little stressed out,"

"Here, take off your shirt and lay back down on your stomach. I’ll massage you for a little bit,”

Looking down at her, he smiled softly at her gesture but shook his head. “Ah, it’s fine. How about we just try to study and then go to sleep?”

She frowned and removed herself from his arms. “No, you’re stressed out, Kookie. I don’t like that. And I do not want you studying and going to bed with a tense back,”

“Baby, I’ll be fine.”

She rolled her eyes. “For goodness sake, what is with men being so stubborn? You know what?”

Quickly, she removed his black jacket, taking him by surprise as he watched her toss it on her bed. He was left in his black V-neck shirt which showed a large amount of his chiseled chest.

“Arms up. Now,” she demanded.

Amused by her sudden demanding voice, he smirked softly and raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, Miss Walker,"

“Stop, I'm being serious,” she cracked a smile, earning a low chuckle from him.

He did what he was told and she grabbed on the bottom of his shirt, slowly lifting it. Once it was over his head, she tossed it on the bed.

“Lie down,” she directed him.

She watched as he got on her bed and laid on his stomach. Feeling her weight on him, Jungkook relaxed under her touch as she went to work on his back, feeling the warm massage oil from her hands. He should stop being so headstrong and listen to her when it came to her massages. He was feeling a difference already as he let out a sigh of bliss. After finishing up, she got off him and he stood up, feeling refreshed as he stretched.

“There!” she happily announced. “All done. I prepared a bath. Go in there and relax. My iPad is there too for whatever you want to watch. And once you’re done, we try to cram and then get some sleep. Now while you’re doing that, I need to start cramming.”

After thanking her, Jungkook went into the bathroom to see the bubble bath prepared. He smiled at the bath. She always found the smallest things to pamper him with.

As he began to unbuckle his belt, a sweet vanilla aroma filled his nose as he looked at all the Bath & Body Works candles she set out.

‘You are always taking care of me. What did I do to deserve you?’ he thought with a smile as his previous negative emotions went away.

With Jennie, she stared at her textbook, confused by the science questions.

‘The heck is this? All I know is that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell. What am I supposed to do with all the rest of this science stuff? I’m not going to go to college for science. Why am I learning this? Why is this on the exam? Ugh!’ she whined in her head.

“Screwed...definitely screwed...that’s a thing? I don’t remember this...mega screwed...aw damn it, I forgot I need to know these formulas,” she rambled, skimming through the pages. "Why can't we just use a cheat sheet? Fuck my life..."

“Baby?”

“Yes?” she looked up from her textbook to see Jungkook wrapped up in a towel, leaning against the door frame.

‘Oh my...’ she thought as she tried to keep her eyes up.

“The tub looks big enough for two,” he said smoothly.

Two...?

Her face began to heat up at his words.

Did he mean...

“You want me to join you?” she asked with surprise in her voice.

He nodded like it was the simplest thing ever.

“You should relax, too,” he added.

“U-um...all right. Can you just give me a moment?"

Jungkook seemed pleased that she accepted his offer and nodded again. "Yeah. I'll be waiting for you," he smiled and went back inside, closing the door.

Once her boyfriend was out of sight, she fell back on her bed and began freaking out in her head. She then proceeded to punch and kick the air in excitement and nervousness.

'Oh my God! A bath!? With Jungkook!?' she exclaimed in her head.

She got out of bed and started pacing around, trying to pull herself together.

'Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! OKAY! BREATHE!' she rambled in her head as reality set in that she just agreed to take a bath with him.

She looked at herself in her large mirror, taking in her appearance. She was still in the attire she danced in for the event which consisted of a black dress with both slits high up and safety shorts. Grabbing a hair tie, Jennie put her hair in a high bun so her hair wouldn't get wet.

'You can do this. You can do this. It's just a bath. A relaxing...intimate bath. Girl...stop stalling. He's waiting on you.' she thought.

She let out a breath and then looked at her clothes. 'Should I...be the one to take this off...or should...'

Jennie glanced at the bathroom door and then back at her reflection. "Okay,"

When she went inside the bathroom and closed the door, she saw that Jungkook hadn't gotten in the tub yet and was patiently waiting for her as he leaned up against the sink.

"Hi," she smiled as she met his loving gaze.

Drinking her in, he returned her smile. "Hi,"

She noticed that he had dimmed the lights to set more of a romantic tone instead. What a view it was as she admired the new setting he provided for them.

“Wow, this is romantic,”

"You like it?"

"Yeah, this is sweet,"

"I'm glad. We never did anything like this before, have we?” he asked as he slowly made his way to her.

“This is a first. Um, could you help me?"

"Yeah, I got you,"

She turned around and once she felt him behind her, her heart rate quickened. Caressing her arms, Jungkook lightly kissed her left shoulder and grabbed the zipper of her dress.

“Relax, Jennie,” he said as he pulled the zipper down. “Let’s relax together and get our minds off the stress, okay?”

“Sounds good,”

As they both got in, Jungkook told her to sit across from him. The bath water was warm as the fragrant suds covered their bodies, relaxing their muscles. She then felt him grab her left foot gently and massage it. It happened to be the foot she felt the most aches and pains with. Despite being mad on stage, Jungkook was quick to notice her discomfort and made a mental note to take care of it.

“I-I thought YOU were supposed to be the one relaxing,” she exclaimed.

“I am,” he smiled. “Seeing you relaxed helps me relax, too. And besides, you hurt your foot. You need this bath as much as I do.”

“I thought I hid it. I didn’t think it was that big of a deal. The ache would go away after a day or two. I just needed to get off of it for a while. And I was kind of planning on massaging it myself while you were taking a bath,” she sighed in content as his large hands worked wonders on her foot.

“Lucky you have me, right? I prefer you to let me massage you, instead. So just tell me, all right?”

“I will,” she promised. “So, do you want to vent to me about how you've been feeling?"

And he did, expressing himself about how frustrated he was that they had to perform so late despite having an exam in the morning. After venting to her, he felt much better and they continued to enjoy their bath.

She watched Jungkook, who had his eyes closed with his arms stretched out, resting on the tub. Deciding to be playful, she made her way over to him and grabbed a handful of bubbles. Jungkook opened his eyes to watch her place bubbles all over his head, shaping it like a hat. He let out a laugh and she commenced to put bubbles around his face like a beard.

“There. My masterpiece is done.” she giggled, moving back slightly.

“How do I look?”

“Amazing, all thanks to me,”

Before he could speak again, she splashed him. The bubbles washed away from his face and his hair also got wet. He shook his head and wiped his face while she laughed out loud.

“I’m sorry, I had to. The look on your face!”

“That’s how it is?” he smirked and began to lean forward.

Widening her eyes, she quickly moved back until her back hit the back of the tub. “Back up! Stop!” she pleaded with laughter and shielded herself from his assault.

The splash was bigger than anticipated as it hit the iPad hanging against the wall. A few candles got drowned out, and some water spilled over to the floor, too, making a huge mess.

“Jeon Jungkook!” she exclaimed, wiping her face.

“Whoops. Maybe I overdid it,”

“You think!?”

“Sorry, honey! Oh no, your iPad!” he noticed and turned Jungshook immediately. He stopped freaking out once he heard her laugh.

“You are so damn extra, oh my God! Look at the mess you made. It’s waterproof. The case is waterproof,” she said, waving his concerns away. “No worries. As for the floor,” she glanced over to the large puddle along with their soaked clothes.

“We’ll live,” he replied and gripped the tub for support as he leaned over her to kiss her deeply.

As their bath continued, Jungkook said, “Come here,” and gently grabbed her to let her lean her back against his chest while his back rested against the tub. Feeling safe and relaxed in his arms, Jennie agreed to watch one episode of anime with him before leaving the tub. As the episode went on, Jen felt him kiss her temple.

"You are so good to me. Thank you for this. I love you," he said in her ear, making her smile.

She turned her head to look back at him and kissed him in response. "I love you, too,"

Things were going to be all right.

After their bath, and changing their pajamas, the couple stayed up to study, sacrificing their sleep. They sat on her bed with books and papers scattered around as they tried to refresh their heads on what the exam would entail.

“Remember, this is going to be on it. It’ll talk about these two topics. I remember the teacher pointing this out. Look at the notes and highlights,” she told him.

“Got it. We need to know about this one, too?” he asked with full concentration.

“Nah, they decided not to put that on the exam so we straight,”

“Good. I hated learning about that,”

“You and me both,”

Jungkook pointed out the Korean grammar to her. “We’re writing an essay on this topic. How’s your grammar looking?”

“It’s going. But it could be better,” she admitted.

“Let’s start with the basics and work our way up just like you did with me for English,”

“Do we have time for that?”

“I’ll make time,”

“Okay,”

A few hours went by as they continued to stay awake and make sure what they studied marinated in their brains.

“Oh, and the formulas. You gotta convert this to that. And then minus that from the second number, not the first,” she pointed it out to him.

He quickly did a practice problem and used his calculator.

“This it?” he showed her his answer.

“Hmmm, I got a different answer. Um...yeah, that’s wrong. You forgot to do this part,” she demonstrated.

“Ahhhh, okay. All right, what about this?” he did another practice problem and showed her his answer.

“Outstanding,” she praised.

A wide grin came across his features and he leaned in to give her a quick kiss. “Golden Maknae does it again,”

“You’re a dork,” she giggled and grabbed another textbook.

After another hour, Jungkook continued to work on math, getting the hang of what was needed.

“I think I got it. Babe? Babe? Jennie?” he looked up to see that she had fallen asleep.

He smiled at her sleeping form and then yawned himself. With sleep overpowering him, Jungkook found himself sleeping next to her with their books and papers still scattered on the bed. The couple had about two hours of sleep to spare before it was time to get ready for school. They were going to enjoy it while it lasted.

#bts 8th member #jungkook x oc #bangtan boys #bts #bts additional member #the bangtan gal #bts fanfic #bts fluff #jungkook fluff #bts fanfiction #jungkook x black oc #kpop black oc #kpop oc #bts added member #bts female oc #bts female addition #bts female member

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onewmin · 1 year ago

Text

the perfume on the shelf. pt. 6 | bangchan

Pairings: Bang Chan x Fem!reader, Kim Yugyeom x Fem!reader

Summary: Falling in love with your best friend was never a part of the plan. So you end it up. But does he want to put a stop to it, too?

Warnings: AU, Smut (minors dni), it’s not specified but the seggs is protected, a lot of kissing, oral (f. receiving), profanity, angst, a brief mention of self-harm, the reader and everybody else is mentally unstable (who isn’t right), mentions of alcohol and drinking, mentions of smoking, Lee Know flirts with a girl, another shitty cliffhanger in the end, typos

Author’s note: originally, this part was planned to be longer and cover the period after the ending, but I felt like it would’ve been too much. It’s not as long as I wanted it to be and maybe not that heartbreaking, but the pain still awaits you later hehe hope you enjoy the chapter!! Let me know what you think!!

Disclaimer: the names and appearances of real people are used for inspiration and writing purposes only. I do not claim anything, everything belongs to its owners.

Part 5 | Part 7

Despite Chan’s constant doubts and destructive thoughts about you still being in love with Yugyeom, that was far from the truth.

Yugyeom was a lingering memory, a bright sun ray that shone to you many years ago. Now he was just there, in the past, while Chan himself had occupied the pedestal inside your heart.

However, you really wanted him to fall down from it this time.

It’d been three weeks since he pushed you off the cliff of love and hope, leaving you to an inevitable, gruesome fall. You fell down from the highest peak into the lowest pit, and there was nothing. Just darkness and loneliness. Although the latter was not for long.

A couple of days after Chris broke up with you, Minho showed up at your door, bottles of beer in his backpack. You got drunk while watching another stupid reality show and ended up crying on the floor, the two of you sobbing in unison.

“He said to me”, Lee Know hiccuped, wiping the tears from his cheeks, “he said, ‘You’re an asshole, Minho’”, his imitation of Chan’s voice was so on spot, you let out a half-laugh through your tears.

“I’m an asshole? For putting up with his terrible dancing and constant nagging that his feet hurt?” Minho was hitting his chest with the fist, the two of you now sitting on the couch. “For sticking with him when his first album flopped? For investing my time, my life in his fucking career?”

You were nodding frantically, chewing the chips, the cheese taste mixing up with salty aftermath of the tears, streaming down your face.

“Never have I ever been an ass to him! Ever!” The tone of his voice rose, cracking when he started sobbing again. “And now he basically fires me! Me! His best friend!”

“No fucking reason”, Minho was lying on the floor again, with you sitting next to him. “Just this sudden bullshit. Why would he do this to me? To you? To us?”

You shrugged your shoulders, taking another sip of beer from another bottle. Was it your third? Fourth one?

“I can’t understand what’s inside his head”, he sighed. “Is it the concussion speaking for him or was he like that the entire time?”

You took a deep breath and exhaled in response. Weeks spent crying and drinking with Minho at both yours and his places, talking shit about Chan and how unfairly he treated the both of you. And neither you, nor Minho had come to any sort of common conclusion. He stood his ground, stomping his feet drunkenly, his words slurring, saying Chris might’ve hit his head so bad that all of the common sense flew out of the window.

You noticed a slightly hilarious pattern: Minho was ready to come up with any bizarre theory in order to excuse Chan’s behaviour. He pushed the both of you away because of the concussion, Lee Know was confident that was the truth. You, however, couldn’t agree with him.

The more you drank after work, the more you threw up afterwards, sitting on the dirty tile floor of whatever bar you were in, the less you could excuse Chris. Sure, he suffered from the aftermath of the accident, this you could understand. But his sudden change of demeanor? Beyond your comprehension. No therapist in the world could’ve explained this to you. Yours included.

“Don’t you think this is a sign you’ve been waiting for? The sign to leave this guy and move on with you life?”

Ah, crap. Could this woman not memorize everything you say? “I don’t think so”.

“Why’s that?”

“Because, I think, he’s just hurt. And he’s trying to push everyone away so that… So that we don’t see him… like this”.

Oh wait, was it your savior complex hitting up again? How mysteriously hurt poor Chan must have been! Pushed everyone away, humiliated his best friends in their own eyes, and told you he lost interest the second his love stopped being unrequited! Poor Chan! How must he suffer!

Oh yeah, he must. Sitting at another bar, Minho’s drunken ranting as the background music, you wished with all your heart Chan was suffering. He put you through so much, making you love him, care for him, and then he made you hate him. To be honest, though, “hate” was a strong word to use; hating him was still impossible. You despised the man he turned out to be, even if he lied to you about ‘falling out of love’ for some reason.

“What fuckin’ reason there has to be to say that shit? What’s the fuckin’ fuck?”

The look on your therapist’s face gave away her genuine surprise at your sudden loss of composure. In over than two years of therapy, you had never even cried during sessions. You’d curse, get slightly angry, but never too emotional. You called this an ‘emotional constipation’, just to make your therapist crack a smile. A clown is always a clown, you’d say, taking pride in getting her to laugh. Although the fun would always wash away when she immediately started writing stuff down.

“Go on”.

Two simple words would bring you to the literal edge of glory: you jumped from your seat, aggressively walking from one corner of the room to another, curse words spilling from your mouth; also, of course, you blamed god for everything — if you could, you’d include your religious trauma in every conversation possible.

“If God was real”, you’d keep on, “would he ever allow Chan in my life? Would he ever let that happen?”

“Did God choose to be in a relationship with Chan, or was it you?”

How dare she? “How dare you?” You stood up, snatching your bag from the floor. “Am I the bad guy here?”

“No”, she said softly, not even moving a muscle during your tantrum, “you’re not, but you desperately want someone to be the bad guy. You cannot paint Chan as a villain because you love him”, you huffed at her words, “but you don’t love the God. So in this case, the latter has to be the bad guy. Correct me, if I’m wrong”.

She was not indeed wrong. But you were resisting therapy: if not, you’d have to face the truth — there were no bad guys. Everyone was just human, making human mistakes. The ones you’d been constantly making while choosing to stay in this relationship with Chan over and over again.

Like him fixing your dinner three months in a row after he came back from tour. Or him helping you take showers when your leg was broken. Or taking care of your cat when you went to see your parents.

He was doing basic shit! Basic shit every decent human being would do when their close friend needed that! Although it’s pretty hard not to praise men when they do the bare minimum, right? ‘Cause it’s so rare. Rare for you specifically, as every man in your life — apart from Yugyeom and Chan — was a self-centered piece of garbage.

And you could take Yugyeom for granted, as he wanted you to have it that way, because he saw the way your father treated your mother — “You’ve got to have an example of a healthy relationship. And I will give it to you”.

Why did he leave then? Why did you leave and led me to keep on falling for the mere shadows of you, Yugyeom?

You shook your head, trying to get rid of the thought. Lately you’d been remembering a lot of things about Yugyeom — probably because you met him all those weeks ago. The most disturbing thought? Oh, it wasn’t that good. It was horrible, so horrible that you had to physically distract yourself.

“Why did you order more drinks?” You looked at Minho, who leaned back in his seat, eyes wandering around the bar room. “Earth to Minho”, you waved your hand in front of his face, while he was staring through you. “I’ll cancel it”.

“No!” Your eyebrows raised in question, as he jumped up from his seat. “This bottle will be the last one, I swear”. Minho grabbed your hands in his, silently begging to let him have the last drink. However, you were not going to indulge in; you found yourself getting accustomed to drinking, to drowning your sorrows in the alcohol. You were tired of it.

You were never the type to get addicted to some bad habits: smoking never stuck to you; you did smoke for a couple of months after your breakup with Yugyeom and you did it occasionally during your latest relationship, but it was never something you couldn’t live without. Drinking, on the other hand, could become addictive if you just didn’t quit it.

How easy it was, to sit around the table with your friend, sipping on alcohol, empty bottles creating a circle on the surface. Eventually you’d run out of space, and that was the reason to pay and leave. Same thing happened to you several years ago, when Yugyeom and you put an end to your relationship; Chan had to drag you from bars and hide alcohol from you so that you wouldn’t have drown in pain. Yeah, you couldn’t get an addiction, as you thought. But you were becoming quite a regular at a broken hearted people pub.

Amidst your verbal fight with Minho, whose retorts consisted of non-comprehensive drunken blabbering, his hands gripping the beer bottle while you were trying to tear it away, you heard a familiar voice behind you. As happy as you were to hear her, the sound of her high-pitched, usually matter-of-fact voice somehow brought chills down your spine.

“That’s enough”, Eunjoo moved you to the side, the grip of her hand on your shoulder making you squeeze your eyes shot. Has she been working out? “Give me that”, she took the bottle from Minho’s hands with almost no effort, as he seemed to oblige to her mere presence. His eyes followed Eunjoo, when she put the money on the table, her fingers tucking a strand of black hair behind her ear. You might have been tipsy, however, the way Minho stared at your best friend couldn’t escape from your attention.

“What’re you doin’ here?” You frowned at her, while Eunjoo observed Minho. Oh right, it was the first time you old best friend and your new bestie met; before that you had no idea whatsoever, but now you thought that they kind of had the same vibe to their personalities.

“Came to collect you”, she replied. What? First she uses a contraction, and now she starts a sentence without the subject in it? Is it really Eunjoo?

“To be honest”, she continued, “I’m really tired of your regular hangovers. Especially I’m tired of your absolutely fucked out look at our job. Where you need to work, and not nap every two hours”. What the literal fuck? Did Eunjoo just curse? Wha-a-at? “I wonder, why you’re still not fired. Oh wait”, she pointed a finger in your direction, “it’s because I’ve been covering for you”.

You sighed. Knowing that it wasn’t the best thing you’d done, you felt the wave of embarrassment rush through your body. Eunjoo had to cover your hangover in front of the boss, and you were forever grateful. If only you had actually thanked her for that.

“Anyways, I’m here to take you home”, this time, her touch on your shoulder was gentle. “And this… friend of yours, too”.

“I’m Minho”. He suddenly appeared in front of Eunjoo, almost pushing you away. You grimaced at his awkward attempt to get her attention.

Eunjoo nodded in response to his words; she didn’t look as if he’d interested her in any way. Hopefully, he won’t, you thought, fastening the seatbelt on the passenger seat of her car, Minho might be a good friend, but his dating history is pretty ugly.

Oh yeah? And Chan’s dating history is all about rainbows and flowers? Isn’t he the one to toss girls away when they reciprocate the love?

You let out a deep sigh, Minho’s drunken flirting with Eunjoo serving as a background for your thoughts. With all the love you had for Chris, either as his friend or failed lover, it was impossible to wrap your head around the bullshit he told you. You wished you could talk it out, spill your secrets and unsaid words, but he didn’t want to. He went radio silence for weeks without any warning, so he wasn’t interested anymore, right?

It isn’t like you could text him, yeah? It isn’t like a dialogue requires two people for it to happen, is it?

After dropping off Minho at his place — and his unsuccessful attempts to get Eunjoo number — she drove you to your apartment. The ride was accompanied by a midnight radio program with the very familiar host to the both of you.

“How’s Youngjae doing?”

“Fine. As far as you can hear, he enjoys his job very much”. Ouch. Your attempt to break the silence was a failure.

“Eunjoo-“

“Shut up”, she hit the brakes at the red light, her sharp knife voice cutting through you. “I get it, okay? You’re going through a tough time”. Youngjae’s contagious laugh filled the car, but this time, none of you smiled. “But you’ve got to move on too. If you keep on drinking, you’ll lose your job. And what are you going to do, huh? Is this Minho going to give you money? Or, d’you think Chan will do it?”

You shook your head, eyes squeezed shut, head low. Felt as if your mother had been scolding you. Only Eunjoo knew you better than your mom did, and Eunjoo was actually sincere and worried about you. She was your best and only real friend, after all.

“You’re smart”, she took a turn to your apartment complex, “smarter than all of those guys. Smarter than Chan”. The car stopped at the parking lot, both of you sat in silence for a moment.

“Don’t waste your life on chasing someone who doesn’t want you”, she covered your hands with hers. “Don’t drink your life away because he decided you weren’t good for him. You might be not enough for this asshole, but you’re certainly enough for everyone else, for me, for yourself. He’s not worth your suffering”.

Your eyes welled up at the words. Pulling her in for a hug, you had to blink rapidly to avoid another crying session.

“Thank you, Eunjoo. Thank you for everything you do for me”.

She hugged you tighter. “You’re always welcome. I know how hard it is for you to say this, and I’m thankful, too”.

“You may take all of the time in the world to overcome this pain”, the two of you were face-to-face again, “you shouldn’t bottle your emotions up. Just… Just talk to me instead of drinking, okay?”

You nodded, a smile creeping up on your lips. Eunjoo’s cousin laughed again, his radio program turned into another comedy show, and the two of you giggled at him. Never in your many failed friendships and toxic friends would you think a girl with a rigorous attitude with whom you had to share the same space at work, could be your closest friend.

Your cat greeted you with serious complaints and loud purrs, obviously demanding food and attention. Several minutes passed before you took your clothes off and stepped into the shower.

Chan used to say that showering together would help saving water, and you always chuckled at his proposals. It’s not like you ever rejected his shenanigans; you didn’t indulge in shower sex, but being naked with him under the water was another intimate moment to cherish.

You hated how everything was about him. Every surface of your flat was interwoven with the memory of him, his fingers squeezing your hips, lips brushing over yours, head in the crook of your neck. He was with you in the shower; he was cooking in your kitchen; he was sprawled on your couch, watching another episode of that dating reality show; he was snoring in your bed, his legs atop of yours. There wasn’t a single place in this apartment that he hadn’t graced with his touch. And you despised yourself for still craving his presence, even after all the pain he caused you.

Brushing your teeth, your brain visualized Chan behind you, a toothbrush in his hand, the other wrapped around your waist. Every little action of his was engraved in your head, not letting your breathe even for a second. How were you supposed to move on when the only thing you see was Chan?

“Do you want to move on?” Your therapist asked you.

“I don’t know”.

“Let’s put it into a different perspective. During your last conversation, he stated he’s been in love with you. Correct?”

“Yes”.

“He also said he liked the process of ‘chasing’ his potential partners. Correct?”

“Yes”.

“And he added that whenever someone reciprocated, he’d lose interest. That includes you. Correct?”

“Uh, yes”.

“After all of the above-mentioned, do you still believe he’s in love with you?”

“Yeah”, you breathed out, the voice of yours being unsteady. “I guess”.

“Why?”

“Because… Because”, you almost choked on your words, “he couldn’t fall out of love with me just suddenly. He couldn’t”.

Coming back to that conversation over and over again, you sat on the floor in your living room, tears falling down your cheeks. Was he ever truly in love with you, or was it another projection of yours? And if he was, how could he be so cruel?

A phone call distracted you from yet another sobbing section of your ‘pining over Chris’ daily program. Of course, only Han Jisung would call you at 1 A.M.

“Sorry for the late night call”, he said after countless apologies, “I just thought I should tell one of you”.

“Tell us what?”

“He’s insufferable”, Han whined, “I dunno what to do to bring him back to his normal self. He’s sulking, keeps being silent and just-“ You heard him sigh. “He’s constantly in his bed. Either sleeping or napping. Or he just lies there, watching the ceiling”.

You kept quiet for a swift moment only. “What d’you want me to do? Call his therapist or something”.

Jisung let out a nervous laughter. “Yeah, like his parents haven’t tried that already. He doesn’t speak to therapists”. Han’s heavy breathing signaled at him being on the verge of crying. Shit, Chan had fucked everyone over.

“He falls asleep quite often”, Jisung continued. “And he sleeptalks, y’know that. And when he does that, he only says your name”.

No. Ah-uh. No. Just no. Why would Han say that?

“So please, if you can, just come and see him. You want him to get better too. I know that”.

Your phone was on the floor next to you, as you scratched you nose to avoid crying. But your lip began to tremble, tears collecting in the eyelashes and everything turned into a blur — there were just your tears, and your wails muffled as you hugged your knees tightly. You used to get noise complaints for your loud moans of pleasure; however, now you’d get some more complaints for your almost-howls and incredibly hurtful sobs. Your chest was aching from the heavy breathing mixed with cries, and your jaw was in pain from open-mouthed inhaling and exhaling. That was a breakdown, such an extreme and terrible one that you couldn’t even see anything because of the amount of tears collected on your eyelashes.

If he was so hurt, why, why would he bring you so much pain? If he was so pathetic afterwards, why break up with you in the first place? Why? Why? Why?

Because he’s an asshole, your inner voice interfered, and because he doesn’t know how to express basic human emotions. You did your best for him, tried your hardest to overcome the most difficult thing — inability to express your emotions. You were there, on your knees in front of him in that hospital room, begging him to love you. Begging him to give the two of you a chance. But he rejected you back then. And now, what? He was mournful? Pining over you?

Ah-uh. He lost the right to it the second he shitted in your ears with that ‘the thrill expired’ bullcrap. He should’ve had a normal fucking conversation with you, talking about his feeling, working it out. But no, this asshole decided to leave you with a plate of shit and run away from human communication just to, what seemed like, die in complete loneliness. The loneliness he created himself. It was nobody’s fault but his.

“I hope he feels what I felt”, you mumbled while washing your face in the bathroom. It was still puffy, under eyes and lips red from all the crying you did; you cursed Han and his damn phone call. Why was he such a good friend? Oh yeah, probably because Chan hadn’t been a fucking butthead to him. Smart choice; otherwise, Mr. Bang would have no more friends left in his life.

You wouldn’t go and see him, right? “Right, of course I wouldn’t”, you stated out loud when raiding your closet in search of that lingerie set Chris loved. Just in case, you kept on telling yourself, I’m looking for it just in case.

You sat on the bed, wearing the said bra and panties, facing the mirror. Disheveled hair, a puffy face, your neck and chest red from all the nervous scratching you did in the last few minutes. It wasn’t like you were going to actually see him, right? And, what’s more important, you weren’t going to let him touch you again, were you?

“I’m not”, you were, as always when alone, talking to yourself; now, as you ran from the bedroom to the living room, dressing up, brushing your hair, you abruptly stopped mid your shenanigans.

Right in front of you, in your bedroom, on that bookshelf with all the books you’d bought but never read, was that damned perfume. Gently kept in between the books, so that your cat wouldn’t throw it on the floor, that perfume bottle was the most vivid proof of your and Chan’s relationship. The only thing, besides photos and gifts, that could transcend you to every moment spent with him. You hated this fucking perfume.

Spraying some on your skin, just on the back of your neck and your wrists, you put it in the bag. You petted your cat, promising you’d come back just in a couple hours, and then the lights in your apartment went off, keys turning in the door.

What the hell were you doing? One call from Jisung, swearing Chris was suffering without you, and? You were wearing that lacy lingerie under your clothes, clean-fucking-shaved, smelling like his favourite perfume, riding in the cab? That’s how easy it was?

You shook your head, disagreeing with your own thoughts. You were desperate to feel him again, to wrap your hands around him, to kiss his plushy lips, to run your hands through his hair. You needed that more than air, but you also couldn’t keep this up just in the name of love.

He was your temple, taking up all of the space in your life. Everything was about Chan, every day of yours accompanied by the presence of him. In those several months of being with him, you found yourself behind the closed doors; you locked them with your own hands. Cancelling plans just in case Chan called? Done. Not communicating with some of your old friends just because they didn’t like Chris? Do-o-ne. You practically had no hobbies by now, because your only hobby had been Chris, and how to keep him interested, and how to make him laugh, and how to make him fall in love with you.

How unhealthy was that?

So now you were going to end it. For good. You were ready to take the last leap and jump, just to get it over with. ‘Cause no matter how much you loved him, you were exhausted. And no amount of love could outweigh the tiredness this relationship had brought you.

And you were there. Staring at Chan, who was wearing his gray pajama pants and nothing more, dumbfounded look on his face. You couldn’t but notice a slight bulge, and you swallowed, images of him floating around your mind.

He let you in, still not a word said. You put the bag on the drawer, quickly putting the perfume bottle on it. You’d leave it here; if he was so desperate to see you, next time he could just spray some perfume around to pretended you were there. You were going to leave this perfume to him, because to you, it was too hurtful to even look at.

You turned around to face him. In the dim light of his apartment, Chan looked pathetically beautiful, as if he’d been a God, sent to Earth just to become your fatal personal tragedy.

One step further. You were right in front of him, hands carefully cupping his cheeks. He watched you with caution, as if you’d been a hallucination, destined to turn into air the moment he dared to touch you.

Today would be the last time he ever lands his hands on your body. The last time you ever let him this close.

No words exchanged between the two of you, when he leaned in, his lips lingering over yours, just slightly touching. Your eyes darted from his lips to his eyes, and there it was. With that simple look, he squeezed your waist and pounced on your lips. You dived in, letting his tongue meet yours in a passionate, i-missed-you-so-much dance. You kissed and kissed, and the only thing you could taste on his lips was betrayal. Because no matter what he was doing now, the memory of him torturing you with his words would forever be engraved in your mind.

When you finally broke the kiss, he was looking at you with a wide smile on his face. Oh, darling Chris, you thought, insinuating yet another heavy kiss, this is not a make up type of situation. You’re getting dumped tonight.

Your back was against the wall, his hands under your shirt, dancing on your bare skin, but not touching where you needed him. Between lips nibbling, him trailing kisses down your chin, teeth grazing down your neck, you could feel the pool of arousal in your panties. Chris could feel it too.

Now your back was against the mattress, his silky sheets welcoming you back in their embrace. Chan was hovering over you, looking you deep in the eyes, touches lingering all over your body, as if you were made out of porcelain, as if he was scared to break you. Too late for that, the inner voice stated, while you roamed your hands all over his body, you already broke me, Chris.

Withholding this intense eye contact while taking off your jeans, Chan let out a gluttural sound, almost a growl, when he saw black lace panties — the set he bought you himself. He trailed kisses from your knees up to inner thighs, humming into your skin. He sharply sucked the same skin into his mouth, marking you as always. Some of the bruises looked like stars when fading away, and you used to think your thigh scars, left there by your teenage self, were vanishing under the love bites Chris was leaving.

But the stars did fade away, and the scars stayed. Under the stars, you were still bleeding — but this time it seemed to be unstoppable; you felt as if you could die from all of that internal bleeding.

A tender kiss Chris left on your yet closed core got you arching your back, your hand immediately landing on his head, fingers in his soft curls. You knew he was smiling when taking off your panties, and you felt it when he left soft kitten licks on your now dripping pussy.

He responded to your moans with a hum, sending vibrations all over your body. You tugged on his hair.

“Are you going to actually fuck me tonight?”

These were the first words uttered tonight. Chris grinned and took his pants off in one swift movement. His dick, hard and leaking with pre-cum, seemed to hypnotize you. You briefly noticed saliva running down his chin from all the excessive sloppy kisses he’d been giving your folds and a smug smile on his face — all just ‘cause he got to taste you again.

“I’m going to”, his knee was between your thighs now, “fuck you senseless”. He tugged on your earlobe with teeth, making you moan into his shoulder.

Slipping a finger inside your slit, Chris caught your whimper by his mouth, covering your lips with his. His thumb pressed to your clit, drawing circles around it, and you almost lost the thin thread connecting you to the harsh reality. It was your last time with Chris. Last time kissing him. Last time being his girl.

“Oh, fuck”, Chan groaned, when you reached for his cock. The mere touch of yours made him twitch and stop all of his movement to keep his composure. “You’re killin’ me, baby”, he rasped, head buried in the crook of your neck.

No matter what he said, you still battled with your reasonable self: she told you not to lose focus, to get pleasure but to never forget — you were leaving him for good. Your emotional side, however… She was already on the cloud nine, willing to obey to any command Chan requires from you. But even her, this bubbly and sweet self of yours — even she knew this pleasure would turn into pain later. Although she didn’t mind loving Chris, even she couldn’t be in love with him any longer. Even your tender persona had found out how much pain Chan inflicted on you.

Pushing in his girthy cock into you slowly, Chris stared right into your soul, observing the way your face expression changed. Your mouth fell open, eyes hazily watching him mirroring you, his grip on your hips tightened. You’d have crescent marks in the morning — the last signs of your love with him ever existing.

Finally, swallowed by warmth, Chris bottomed out, letting you adjust, as you gripped him, head thrown back. He peppered kisses all over the side of your neck, hands massaging your breasts slowly, pinching nipples to make you gasp.

As he sluggishly thrusted into you, Chan couldn’t take his eyes off you. You knew he was watching, as he always did, but you just couldn’t bring yourself to stare back at him. You wanted to cum, not to cry.

As he felt you getting comfortable enough, Chan set a pace, massaging your inner walls in a frantic tempo. You squeaked every time he hit that spot, burying himself deep inside of you. You grinded against him, begging for more friction, as your nails left marks all over his shoulders.

“This is what you want?” His thumb started drawing circles on your clit, your composure long lost under the thick layer of pleasure.

Except for your mewls and Chan’s groans, the sound of skin on skin clapping was filling in the room. Although the way your pussy squelched every time Chris pounded into you was the only sound you could hear.

“Shi-i-i-t”, he hissed, his cock throbbing inside of you, “I can’t g-get enough of y-you”, Chan stuttered, your walls fluttering around his cock made him lose his mind little by little.

“I love you”, he huffed, forehead pressed to yours, “I love you so fucking much”.

Savoring his words — words you hoped to hear every time you were this close, you couldn’t bring yourself to reciprocate. You wish you could give in and forget all of that like it was a bad dream. You wish you could. But you never would.

“Shut up”, your breath hitched as you pulled him in for another sloppy kiss.

You’d yield to temptation one more time, to feel his hot breath on your skin, to feel the shockwaves gripping your body as you saw the stars while he chanted your name, reaching his high. The sheer layer of sweat covering the both of you, Chris watched as your breath steadied and you got up on the wobbly legs.

“Wait for me in the shower”, he puffed, still laying on his back, eyes shut.

“I’m going home”.

You stepped out of the room, collecting your jeans from the floor when he appeared behind you. “What? Why?”

You sighed. “Do I really need to explain this to you? After everything you’ve done to push me away?”

“But I-I thought… You and I, we…”

“What? Fucked?” You put your jeans on and huffed at his words. “Doesn’t mean anything. Doesn’t mean I’m going to stay with you after you pushed me away”.

“I’m so sorry”, he whispered. Chan screwed up his face and sniffed, and deep inside you felt like shit for making him feel this way. “I’m an idiot, baby, I have no excuses. Just if-“

“No”, you retorted. “No. You’re only interested now ‘cause I’m out of reach again, aren’t I? ‘The thrill of chasing’, that’s how you call it?

“Baby…” His eyes were closed as he let out a deep sigh. Yeah, you fucked up big this time, Chris. There’s no way out.

“Is there anything, anything I can do for you to forgive me? Please?”

“Yes, there’s one thing. Disappear from my life forever”.

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