#yuck factor

[anisthasiazewicor]

Not @my mom who put corriander seeds in my food even though she knows i hate them, like sure maybe it was an accident, but then to tell me that i was making too big a deal out of it? Wtf

Coriander seeds taste so strong that if you get them in your mouth, so long taste of anything else!

I haven't had kuae in ages, i was so looking forward to them! And now i cannot enjoy them anymore because with each spoonful i fear the coriander seeds, and they keep proving me right.

This is the fucking worst.

And then mom: there aren't that many, you are over reacting.

Am i though? Look at this pic!

Are you disgusted? Because i am! Look how many coriander seeds i seprated already! And yet

Bloody buggers seem to be in an unlimited supply, weather whole, crushed, halved or just the shell, and all of them are as bad as the other if you accidentally bit into it, which you obviously end up doing when eating!

I am so splitting mad

Anf then her constantly nagging me to finish up already and go to sleep

Like fuck that, go to sleep yourself, why qre you so gung ho on my going to sleep at the same time qs you after you have already ruined ny dinner :/

[beaft]

i do have a soft spot for books/movies that have that kind of low-budget yucky feel to them. like if they were a place they'd be a house where everything is stained nicotine-yellow and coated in a thin layer of grease. horror directors in the 80s understood this

[vaultsixtynine]

wish there was Somewhere in my apartment i could put the litterboxes that didn't get litter all over everything

[escapistcatontheinternet]

woah why r ppl lobbing death threats at my boyfriend kabru in the notes of my dungeon meshi post... just bc he is fantasy racist...

[paper-paiges]

I'm actually obsessed with this look

[absolutewifey]

Everyone is "progressive" until someone gives them the Ick.

[devinwolfi]

i love using the wrong pasta shapes for things. spag and cheese. vegetable penne. tortellini-lasagna.

[shawshankshadow]

so endlessly pleased that shadow’s edgy emo wing thingies are absolutely disgusting. sega could’ve given him neat, easy-to-draw goth bat wings but instead they were like no we are going full-on foul with this, he’s gonna get meatgore flappers, he is getting cursed with a massacre back there, a blood vessel body-horror crime scene. hannibal lecter art installation on his back, maximum yuck factor. and it’ll be super painful too. everybody say thank you sega

[hypertextdog]

YOU -- mm i want a fat man on me gaystyle but with clothes on

FURRY INCLINATION [Medium: Success] -- Any *animalline traits* to him, two-legs?

SENSATION -- That would do nicely, texturally speaking...

YOU -- not for now, but i'll keep that in mind.

POSTER'S GAMBIT [Easy: Success] -- Yes. YES. It's the perfect emotion. Everyone wants -- even if not that. So generalize, blogsman. Ambiguate. With this, you can finally build your *viral empire.*

BROAD APPEAL [Hard: Success] -- With your crowd: three faves, and a flirtatious re-blog from some fur-fag. Eight if the bitcoinette or the not-lycanthrope touches it...

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- Try again. We're *this* close to another "you have to let 'denny's parking lot at 3am' go."

YOU -- mm i want big men on me gaystyle #gay #mlm #lgbt #asexual

SENSATION [Medium: Success] -- But it's not about "big" -- "big" alone is nothing. Non descript. You crave *plasticity* -- you want to feel him pushing through, between your fingers...

FURRY INCLINATION -- Oh, yes. Sounds *sonft,* two-legs.

SENSATION -- *Really* sonft. If we must say it that way. And so *heavy* on our supine body, too. I almost wonder if we could...

New task: Administer the *auto-hand-job.*

SENSATION -- Yeah.

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- NEVER MIND THEM. Never mind any of that. You're almost there. Keep going, blogsman. *Earn* the U.R.L.

BROAD APPEAL [Hard: Success] -- Thirteen faves, four reblogs. None flirtatious -- none you think.

YOU -- what's missing?

BROAD APPEAL -- What do you think?

YOU [Impossible: Success] -- the *sapphic* factor.

BROAD APPEAL -- Exactly right. I *told* you I'm named this way for a reason...

HIGH SCHOOL G.S.A. -- Do it for Erin. And Michaela. I wonder if they're still...

BROAD INTUITION [Medium: Success] -- They're not.

YOU -- mm i want big men or women on me #lgbt #ambiguously queer

HIGH SCHOOL G.S.A. -- Ah-ah-ah.

BROAD APPEAL -- And about that word "big" ... you know what has to happen.

YOU -- but that's the core of it to me, kind of.

POSTER'S GAMBIT [Easy: Success] -- And to the fur-fag sector.

BROAD APPEAL -- A sector is nothing. We want the *website* in our hands. Even the proponents of Astarion, and the proprietors of "best girls"...

YOU -- Yuck.

BROAD APPEAL -- I know. But they're the only way.

VANITY [Easy: Failure] -- God, we'll be on *Ellen.*

BROAD APPEAL -- Enough of that. She's out.

YOU [Impossible: Success] -- mm i want anything at all #lgbt #ambiguously queer #asexual

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- STOP THERE. YOU'VE FOUND IT, BLOGSMAN. QUICKLY -- BEFORE WE BOTH FORGET -- TYPE IT UP AND POST.

BROAD APPEAL -- The known numbers don't go high enough. You've found a ticket out of here -- out of *Massachusetts.*

SHIVERS -- IN 2027, A METEOR THE SIZE OF A KLEAN KANTEEN WILL LAND IN THE CENTER OF ROXBURY AND LEVEL BOSTON WITH ITS ZETTA-JOULES OF IMPACT ENERGY. TOO SMALL AND TOO QUICK FOR EVEN M.I.T.'S OBSERVATORY-BOYS TO DETECT.

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- More important things than that are happening -- and sooner, too. Type it up, blogsman. This is the easy part...

YOU -- You type: "mm i want anything at all #lgbt #ambiguously queer #asexual."

SENSATION [Hard: Success] -- Stop. Go back. It's dishonest.

BROAD APPEAL -- This was never about you -- you were only ever the basis on which *this* could be constructed. If that...

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- Post it, blogsman. Make the world relate to you.

YOU -- You hit: "post."

YOU -- The progress bar reaches -- reaches -- completes. A green light indicates success.

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- YES. YES... Oh, I suppose we should have waited for *optimum posting hours.* It doesn't matter now. It's done -- and the onslaught faves will begin rolling in catastrophically in three... two...

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- In three... two...

Thought gained: Any day now...

POSTER'S GAMBIT -- Don't worry, blogsman. Just keep checking your phone -- the *wi-fi* here is *bunk,* anyway.

VANITY -- And once it does -- Ellen.

[peaches-and-creamm]

where and how they like kisses!♡

Featuring: Yuta, Megumi, Satoru, Choso, Toge, Suguru, Yuji, Toji and Nanami

Warnings: Suggestive on Toji's, G/N reader all 'round, reader wearing lipstick in Megumi's(if that needs a warning...?) ♡

YUTA loves to kiss you on the inside of your wrists, and anywhere on your hands really. He loves when you hold hands and almost always lifts up your hand to place a gentle kiss either to the back of your hand or right on the inside of your wrist- he says it’s because he can feel your heartbeat against them.

--------

Any types of kisses with MEGUMI are always something to remember, but his favorite would probably be forehead kisses, or to the corners of the lips for sure. Also he will just always side eye you whenever you're wearing lipstick because he likes to pretend to hate how a kiss mark looks all over his face. He'd happily sit there with you on his lap while you placed many kisses all over his face, and he'd return the favor.

--------

SATORU would kiss you however he could, but likes to squeeze your cheeks together and LOUDLY go “mmMWAH” every time without fail. Dudes a man child- He loves kissing the top of your head as well, not just because of the height difference(ok that’s a big factor as well but-) Something about when the two of you are cuddling and he kisses the crown of your head is just. mwah- chefs kiss

--------

When it comes to CHOSO something about kisses on the cheek just really do it for him. He loves how soft and squishy they are, and cupping your face in his large hands while he wetly smacks his lips against your cheek make him extraordinarily happy (he slobbers, idc. my messy boy.)

--------

TOGE likes kissing your temples, and anywhere close to your ears really. Since he can't whisper complements and such to you he finds comfort in kissing near/around your ears for some reason. If you'd ever ask why he likes it he really couldn't pinpoint when he started doing it. Just a habit at this point.

--------

SUGURU enjoys quick pecks more than anything, really. Oh don't get him wrong he love loves loves to just sit for hours kissing you but just simple quick 'hello' and 'goodbye' kiss makes his heart melt. Also became more of a habit since the girls would go 'yuck!' every time you two would kiss for longer than a few seconds.

--------

Literally any type of kiss YUJI would like- the silliest one you two have done was the spiderman kiss and almost every time you two watch a movie he asks to do it- But normally he really just likes ye ol kiss on the lips, nothing beats it. Unless just aggressively smushing both your cheeks together counts.

--------

TOJI would seriously french you anywhere- it's actually crazy. Like literally be careful if you make eye contact with this dude for more than like, 3 seconds because he'll be on u like mf. Seriously he knows how to take your breath away in literal SECONDS- he doesn't do short kisses but he has a GIGA soft spot for whenever you kiss his cheek- will literally lean down expectantly while he waits for you to do it.

NANAMI is one to hold the back of your head and place a gentle kiss to your forehead, and of course is the type of man to kiss the back of your hand whenever the opportunity presents itself.

M.LIST♥

[motziedapul]

If you don't mind my sharing my own, probably less spicy POC rep in audio drama take: the AD community's tendency toward celebration of "representation" within the medium as if this rep applies to anything substancially besides queer characters is exausting. Sure, queer rep is important but so often reading "there's rep for everything!" and the cast is like, 95% white? Or, bafflingly, people claiming diversity for something that is entirely fanon? Mmh.

Hi anon!

My take is just about as spicy, honestly.

There's a tendency to value "racially ambiguous" characters played entirely by White actors over actual BIPOC characters

(usually with BIPOC actors, though I'm not as strict about this since I don't mind White actors playing BIPOC characters so long as BIPOC voice actors can play White characters and no BIPOC actors lose voice acting opportunities. And as long as more attention is given to BIPOC creators than we're getting currently).

It sometimes feels as though BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, People Of Colour) characters and creators are overlooked in favour of characters who are ostensibly White but drawn by fandom as BIPOC.

I've seen a lot of support in the community from fellow audio drama people; I've felt uplifted by my fellow creators who are White, and I always appreciate and value that. And obviously some shows are just well made and part of their success is based on other factors.

But as someone who's also aware of audio drama fandom, it's easy to see how much favour is given to White Characters drawn as BIPOC in comparison to characters who are BIPOC in text, and I'm not sure why.

That's my spicy opinion. I follow a few BIPOC creators but I can only name two that have an amount of success comparable to White audio drama creators (Gabriel Urbina of W359 fame and Octavia Bray of Atypical Artists), but my knowledge is limited.

And that's not even getting into female led audio drama, but I do love the success of creators such as Lauren Shippen in the space.

I'm not here to yuck anyone's yum or blame anyone for this phenomenon, but I do think it's worth thinking about. Why I see 50 brown Jonny Simses for every canonically brown Samama Khalid. Maybe it's all a coincidence based on other factors. Maybe White characters invite more imagination in their depiction or something.

I don't mind BIPOC depictions of ostensibly White or "racially ambiguous" characters, but I'm not a big fan of if they outnumber depictions of canon BIPOC characters. I just think the latter deserve more love.

I'm no expert. Also I'm mostly in the horror space, apart from my love of Life With Leoh (a sci fi romcom). My knowledge is very limited so if anyone would like to contradict me, I welcome it (especially if it means discovering more BIPOC led shows).

I don't want this to just be about complaining, so please feel free to shout out some fantastic BIPOC led audio drama (either created by or with a majority BIPOC cast) or even share some art you've done of characters from them and I'll happily share them.

My favorites are Wolf 359 (by Gabriel Urbina) and Life with Leoh (by Octavia Bray)!

[paper-paiges]

Knowingly holding a powerful laser towards his fucking eye

[incognitopolls]

*using "gross" vs "immoral" as a baseline - "gross" here meaning an innate yuck factor, something that naturally makes you feel disgust; and "immoral" meaning something that you are ethically opposed to.

–

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[omghallucinations]

Bang Chan Chart Analysis: in the weeds edition

chart patterns, degrees, fixed stars, aspects, final dispositors, basically all kind of deeper cuts.

ah, bang chan: a double libra gemini rising whose other planets are acting up so much i barely even touched on venus and mercury somehow

like he's clearly an air sign in every respect--he loooOOOves to talk, he's curious and interested in a lot of different things, he's never met a secret he doesn't want to immediately tell five hundred thousand people on live... but damn some of those other planets (saturn, mars, jupiter, uranus) are loud.

right away i noticed his chart is a bucket chart--every planet is in one half of the circle, except for one planet who becomes the "handle": his aries saturn. saturn is hammering all the other planets on the head so to speak.

saturn: you'll have to come through me motherfuckers

saturn is screaming it's ME i'm the BIG BOSS and as the handle, a lot of things in chan's life are gonna be based on or deal with--for better or worse--saturn stuff (maturation, fear, control, authority, judgment). chan's saturn automatically rockets to the top of his Big Boss list (it will not stay here tho, we've got some other bosses coming).

saturn is in its fall in aries--it doesn't speak the language there. any planet in its fall is usually marked down in influence but i also think it makes the planet more important? chan has to struggle with it. a saturn at home in capricorn (barring other chart factors) is very natural. 8/9 members of girls generation have saturn in capricorn and wow does that make sense. saturn in capricorn prizes Work and is self-conscious/guilty of its feelings (feelings are not productive), it's alllways anxious it hasn't done enough, it is very scared of disappointing people, it's deeply conscious of societal conditioning.

aries is a weird sign for saturn to be in. saturn has a lot of fear, and aries has a lot of fearlessness. aries is a baby and saturn is all about maturation. aries is about acting without thinking, saturn is about making a list and checking it 5 times then deciding not to do it just in case.

and then. this is fun. saturn goes on the big boss list again because it is unaspected--this doesn't mean there aren't aspects, it means there are no major aspects to other planets. when a planet is unaspected, everyone around you can sure as fuck see the hell out of it, but you can't really. it's center stage but not in the play.

bang chan: i am the cutest, fuzziest lil libra guy :) i just care about my work which is normal :) and i express that care in a very reasonable and chill way :) i just want things to be good! :) everyone around him, shaking in fear from his scathing judgment and innate leadership aura: uh-huh

an unaspected planet is usually a generational thing--chan really popped up like hey girl :) i'm here to really personify our family problems of work, judgement, fear and maturation and just like. make 'em huge and unavoidable. haha. :)

chan's gonna show real extremes of behavior around his saturn, which

in aries seems like it's dealing with issues of creation, self-determination, doing it on my own, that kind of stuff (so he'll deny himself or assert himself too much in turns)

in the 11th house backs that up--the 11th is the aquarius house, so saturn is in aries (a "me" sign) in a "we" (in a sort of detached intellectual sense) house

11th/aquarius usually wants to set u free :) but in a kind of back-handed passy aggy harry styles way, like "i love you so i'll set you free, because i am such an open-minded person, unlike other people (who are tethered to humanity which is both embarrassing and scary to me yuck), also setting you free is less terrifying to me than being perceived :) go with god :) bye :)"

it's in the sun decan, so there's a flavor of "look at me look at me" and identity formation (am i what i produce?)

saturn's most exact aspect is sesquisquare mars which acts a lot like a square, my favorite aspect! squares get such a bad rap but i think they're so much better for your life in the long run bc they force you to deal with things. his mars is in sagittarius, so we have a double fire sign situation: explosive, passionate, loves attention and creation. mars, who also gets a bad rap, is our survival planet. it's like, how are you gonna survive this. how are you gonna get what you want and defend yourself and win (if you care about winning) (chan cares about winning).

sagittarius mars is gonna go forward kind of joyfully but also in a "fuck you lmao" way. it's courageous bc it doesn't really think anything could go actually wrong. it's gonna Leave if it's bored (and it's already bored). it's gonna wide-angle zoom on the situation and be like "lol embarrassing... for you" and feel 100% sure it's right All The Time. sesquisquare saturn tries to control this force, adds a bunch of fear and repression and Issues (and often in later life, wisdom), so -> chan's gonna really be afraid of his own anger, of losing control of his temper -> ironically he will be unable to stop bouncing between these two extremes to various degrees. u can't control what u can't accept my dude. -> he's also afraid of not being in power, of not winning -> the me/we extreme will also come into play--especially with his sun and moon in libra (that's their whole Thing) sagittarius says "i'm right for objective, philosophical reasons" and aries says "i'm right because i just am bro i don't have to explain myself to you" mars in the 6th house--that drive to assert himself is gonna really go hard at work and in his daily life. this is a #gymbro placement for sure. his daily routine is Let's Fuckin Go At 150% -> his 11th house (where saturn is), loves the idea of people, community, his ideals, is detached from humanity and it comes into conflict with -> his 6th house, which is very much of the world, very critical, very let's get actual shit done and be of service to people sidebar, mars is exactly conjunct the asteroid quaoar-- creation, making new rules and structures, diverging from how things Have Always Been Done, please hold this thought for his uranus, coming up soon

libra moon at 29 degrees: heard u were desperately trying to maintain equilibrium for emotional security reasons lol

another planet i'm eyeing is his libra moon which is in the anaretic degree, 29. he's very good at this energy but it's gonna test him. with his libra moon he needs contact and dialogue with people to feel secure but it can't get too deep because that's gonna freak him out. he is super comfortable being vulnerable and emotional on the internet because the internet is not real. i mean it's real, but it doesn't feel real. it's the equivalent of over-intellecualising your feelings so you don't actually feel anything (which an air moon always enjoys, as a hobby). just like it's way easier and less scary to be in love with an idea of a person, rather than the actual person! the actual person can really fuck up ur moodboard!

chan needs things to be pretty, equal, even-keeled. libra is such a funny sign because often it gets flattened to this like "cutey pie flirt" stereotype which i would say is almost exclusively libra venus. libra is a cardinal sign--an acting, initiating sign--and can be a lot more controlling than it likes to pretend imo. it's also in his sixth house--he's gonna feel safe when he can be of service to others, when he can get things done, when he can edit shit, basically.

he's also a new moon baby, which gives a moon a fun, aries-y, baby-tries-(food)-for-the-first-time vibe. removes a lot of those libra inhibitions and adds a lot of need to feel special.

chan is so good at making sure he feels safe by trying to keep everything cute and not too deep and staying on the surface or removed from the situation through constant activity and like, pruning everything, trying to perfect everything (therefore not having to actually deal with anything). howmstever, this system is gonna repeatedly implode throughout his life. soz bud. his emotional foundation's gonna get pummeled on and off which sucks because he has an almost manic need

for emotional safety through strategic diplomacy and avoiding confrontation

for emotional safety through constant work and "perfecting" everything

for people to like him everyone needs to like him or he will die

(not the real him, that makes him nervous, the projection of him that he painstakingly curates, that is safer)

it's not especially fun to deal with.

bright side, wisdom in later life!

mercury, ruler of chan's ascendant: pretty much exactly what you'd expect?

as a gemini rising, chan's ruler is his mercury in libra in the 5th but ironically i don't feel like she's as major of a player as some of these other planets. you can see the communication and curiosity focus of his life, and in the 5th house of self-expression, creation. mercury is sextile mars and pluto, a talent for making his voice heard and powerful, trine uranus in the 9th he's confident about and believes in his unique voice/perspective.

like mercury is there and she's important, but she's not like. causing big waves? it's like his life direction, again, important, but i'm more intrigued by...

mars conjunct pluto opposite his ascendant: oh boy!

this is his one big opposition and it's on the gemini-sagittarius axis (my fave, she's just fun and curious, she's not super dramatic or that difficult although she doesn't exactly make it easy to make... decisions... or get anything done?). however if we were worried about getting shit done, mars and pluto are here to scream. mars conjunct pluto is exactly as dramatic as sagittarius-gemini is not.

this is an exact conjunction and it's wild. anything pluto touches blows up in a way. it makes it intense and secretive and adds the planet to its portfolio of unconscious past life soul security demands.

lmao i just realized that red lights is fully this conjunction lmao oh no. i don't know if i can talk about this conjunction normally. it's very... ... nsfw.

sometimes pluto conjunct mars forces mars into the background and makes the person afraid to assert themselves, but i don't think that's exactly the vibe here, although it's similar. it looks to me like chan has a lot of rage and anger in him that, with his libra placements, he probably has a very difficult time acknowledging or facing. he'll easily internalize it and turn it inward and be a real asshole to himself, and also his temper will flare up randomly and he'll go for the kill shot when he meant to communicate like a normal person. he has a lot of strong desires, he also wants power, but he's gonna hide it and run from the reality there. he does have almost inhuman will, courage and drive tho, he can truly endure anything.

(idk i think he should be a little worried about his physical body, so many of his coping mechanisms depend on exercise/endurance and with pluto--transformation, security--in the sixth house i worry his health might force transformation? ur body can't carry all of ur unspoken shit my bud?)

gemini rising wants to seem very fun, very friendly, very cute, but with mars and pluto on his descendant chan is almost hiding or ignoring a huge part of himself--all those darker impulses which aren't going anywhere. my guy loves a taboo and (redacted redacted redacted redacted REDACTEDDDD). whatever, it's good for creativity and in sagittarius he has a good sense of humor about it.

jupiter: uno reverso???

damn chan really got #blessed here, a lot of that chart was really screaming Issues, Internalized Rage, Fear, Depression, etc, but jupiter really bounced up to be like "never mind haha. i mean yeah, true, but also whatever"

first of all jupiter is in its home house, the 9th--chan's on a Journey, he's eat pray loving, he's Listening and Learning--and it's in aquarius, so that belief system and personal philosophy is gonna be very open-minded, very science fiction, very predicting trends, very ahead of society.

jupiter conjunct his MC: this is what pulls jupiter up to the big boss list. anything conjunct your MC is at the top of your chart--people see it. people notice it about you. and goddamn are people just gonna give him stuff. and they always have. no wonder jyp was like This Is My Special Boy, like that is jupiter conjunct MC to a t.

(the public perception of chan is also gonna be a lot... cuter and more exuberant and fun than the actual man. not that he's not those things. just that the jupiter of his personality is really what people are noticing about him from the outside: his personal vision, his expansive side, all that. they are not looking at that prominent saturn as much, even if saturn is a bigger player)

jupiter trine the sun: another one where people are just gonna like you. for one thing they'll notice chan's good intentions and generosity--altho they will also notice his tendency to moralise and be a liiiiittle condescending--but his tendency towards bouncy optimism (at least outwardly) makes people want to follow him aquarius jupiter trine libra sun: two "we" signs in a big way, except aquarius is "we" like "humanity" and libra is "we" like "you and me", but they unite in a tendency to conflate the personal identity with the group identity--with jupiter and the sun at play it's like chan is able to bring people on board with his identity and personal vision (but he often presents an idealised version of himself who does not have needs, somehow) 9th house trine 5th house: basically a repeat of jupiter-sun, since the 5th house is the leo house--chan has a talent for using his personal philosophy/vision in creative works

our final big boss of the night, perhaps the ultimate big boss: aquarius uranus

chan's aquarius uranus is really talking to everybody. it has by far the most aspects of any planet. uranus has its hand in his ascendant and every planet except jupiter and neptune. with modern rulers aquarius is at home in uranus, and i'm coming around a little bit on modern rulership even if i think it tends to be less prominent than traditional. still:

aquarius uranus: original thought, technological progress, your box is dumb i'm not going in there uranus in the 9th house: he's gonna have an offbeat belief system--no chance he buys into korea's societal norms, or anyone's societal norms for that matter. he's not a conformist. trine his gemini ascendant: whooooo boy he is really not a conformist. when he's not in a Mood he's not judgmental at all, even when he's in a mood he has a real benevolent Ah, Humanity Should All Be Free to Pursue Happiness vibe. gemini couldn't give a shit about morals, and uranus and aquarius think morals are bourgeois. he has a talent for his own difference--some uranus people (like most of ateez, my weirdo darlings) have chips on their shoulders about being different, but chan with his easy trine is just happy to be himself. i mean a trine uranus isn't gonna change the world (unlike harder aspects like squares, who would be more driven to do so) but he is gonna set a good example just through his identity.

this is a fun side of chan! i like this!

square moon: mmmm ok about that chip on his shoulder. although it's not really about being different--it's more about he both wants to be stable and emotionally secure and also free and independent and he's soooooooo fucking stubborn (but he doesn't see it that way because he's Right, not stubborn). he's prone to feeling really itchy and stuck and then making big changes out of nowhere. also he's very intuitive but overly sensitive and when he's hurt he's gonna shut down completely and not tell the person what they did wrong. didn't he give someone the silent treatment? jisung? yeah that's uranus square moon energy. he has a lot of fear around his emotions and only lets himself feel in short sharp bursts. he feels hurt and he cuts out the person immediately without warning to protect himself--even if it's completely illogical he will dupe himself into believing it is very logical and correct, actually libra moon square aquarius uranus: yeah this looks like a "keep the peace even if it is unhealthy" v. "radical change out of nowhere the tower ass" argument, he'll bounce between the two extremes again. heyyy gemini rising i didn't even see u there!!

man. really haven't gotten into everything including his sun in libra (in its fall), his nodes (classic idol 5th-11th axis, soooo many of them have this), etc, but i've been working on this for so long!! aughhH!!

ok drumroll please, let's gather up his chart big players!! normally i would rank these, but i keep changing my mind.

aquarius uranus

aquarius jupiter

sagittarius mars-pluto conjunction

aries saturn

libra mercury (2nd to lastish)

libra moon (definitely last on this list)

tentatively i'm gonna put uranus-jupiter tied at 1, then mars-pluto then saturn then mercury. ugh i don't know though. they're all big players! chan in general has one of those spread-out charts--when you look at the ruler of each planet, he has what's called a "committee" tree

where there isn't one or two final bosses, and the planets are all connected in one tree rather than being separate. you can see how chan's 3 top planets are sag mars, aquarius jupiter and aries saturn--they all work together and are super interconnected. he's not as single-minded as someone with a singular dispositor (ateez hongjoong has a singular final dispositor tree with his pisces jupiter) but also not as split or conflicted as someone who has split trees (ateez seonghwa has a planet in rulership tree with separate parts).

anyway this has been really interesting! for someone with what seems at first glance to be a very unified chart (air moon, air sun, air rising) he has some interesting conflicting energies--altho i'm sure he sees himself as just an air person. i'm sure he is lowkey aware of that mars and pluto conjunction but i'd bet he really pretends he does not see it (except for in REDACTED REDACTED EXTREMELY REDACTED situations), and he truly cannot see his saturn at all (altho everyone else can!).

[mellowsadistic]

“Seriously, Daddy? I have to wear this shirt?”

“It suits you, baby," Juliana's boyfriend told her, glancing up from his work and looking her over briefly. "It makes you look sexy.”

Juliana blushed, angry at herself for the pleasant fluttering she felt in her tummy. “It makes me look ridiculous!” she insisted. “And I do not love diapers!”

But her boyfriend was totally focused on his laptop again and she wasn’t even sure he’d heard her. She huffed angrily and looked around for the rest of her clothes. Daddy always laid them out for her in the mornings.

She frowned when she saw the short shorts he’d chosen for her. There was no way they'd fit over her nappy! “Um… Daddy? I think you’ve made a mistake.”

“Oh?”

“These are my old shorts,” she said.

“I know, sweet-cheeks," he said, not looking up from his laptop. "I always liked the way you looked in them.”

“But… but... but Daddy, they don’t fit anymore, remember? They won’t cover my… my…” She felt her stomach drop when she realised he knew exactly how the shorts would look on her. “Daddy, no!”

“It doesn’t matter if they don’t hide your diaper, baby girl," he said, typing a final few words on his laptop with a flourish before shutting the lid. He turned to smile at her. "What matters is you look pretty as a princess for me.”

"I'd look much prettier in panties," Juliana suggested, but it was a half-hearted effort. She knew he'd never let her wear big girl underwear again. They'd had too many fights in the days before he'd started her on diaper discipline, and even she had to admit their relationship was much more stable now, and happier too... she only wished it hadn't come at the price of her potty privileges. Nappies were yuck!

"I don't think so, darling," her boyfriend said gently, getting up and walking over to stand above her. He put a finger under her chin and tilted her head up to look at him. "I think your perky little butt looks hot in diapers. I know you don't like them, but that makes it even more special that you wear them for me. I'm so proud of you for giving up the potty, baby."

Juliana fought the happy smile tugging at her lips. That shouldn't make her pleased. He was praising her for going to the bathroom in her own pants for God's sake! What was the matter with her?!

He bent down and kissed her on the forehead, and Juliana shut her eyes, revelling in his love and approval. “Shorts on now, diaper-butt,” he ordered, straightening up again, and Juliana jumped to obey.

The shorts went up her legs easily enough, but after that they were a problem. She had to tug hard, jumping up and down on the spot to try and squeeze her thickly diapered derriere into them. Eventually she managed to stuff her padded bum inside, stretching the denim fabric as taut as it would go, but she couldn’t get the zip to do up even an inch, leaving much of her nappy still exposed - and that wasn’t even factoring in the obvious diaper bulge or the plastic waistband sticking a full two inches out of the top. Juliana pouted. She was going to look so stupid sitting around the house like this all day.

“Good girl,” her boyfriend cooed, putting the shy smile back on her face. “Shoes on next, baby."

Juliana’s smile vanished at once. Why?” she asked. Surely he didn't mean...

He chuckled. “Why do you think, silly girl? We’re going out.”

“No!” she said at once. This was going too far! “No way! I’m not going out like this!”

"Little girl...” her boyfriend said warningly. “Calm down and do as you’re told.”

“No I will not calm down and do as I’m told!” Juliana shouted. All the warm contentment she'd felt had gone in an instant. “I’m not going to be seen in public like this!“

“Sweetheart, diaper discipline is a lot more common nowadays. Chances are you won't be the only girl in town wearing baby pants today."

"I don't care! I'm not doing it!"

"That's enough, Juliana," Daddy said, raising his voice. "You behave yourself or you'll be getting a bare bottom spanking before we go out!"

Juliana hesitated for half a second, but then she stomped her foot in indignation. She didn't have to put up with this! She wasn't a child, and he wasn't her Daddy! "No!" she shouted, with as much determination as she could.

For a moment, her boyfriend just looked at her. Then he took a seat on the bed. There was a hard look on his face. “Here,” he said, pointing at the floor in front of him.

Juliana didn't move.

"Come here."

She swallowed. Her body was trembling. "I said n-"

“Right now, little girl!”

Juliana wet herself. She could feel the warmth spreading through her nappy as her bladder emptied itself in fear. Her hands moved, almost on instinct, to her bottom. She'd pushed him too far. She started to walk automatically towards him. She hadn't even finished peeing yet; wee-wee was still streaming into the thirsty padding between her legs as she toddled over to where her boyfriend sat. She was the one standing above him now, but she didn’t feel powerful at all.

"Shorts down," he instructed.

She did as she was told. It was easier to get them off than on, and with a quick tug, they were sliding down her legs.

Daddy probed the front of her nappy with his fingers, pressing the piss-soaked padding against her sex and making her wrinkle her nose in disgust. "You've peed yourself," he said.

"Yes Daddy..."

"But your diaper's not going to leak yet. You can wear this again when we're done." He ripped open the tapes on one side, then the other, and her sodden nappy fell heavily into her shorts with a wet thump.

Juliana's bottom lip wobbled. “Daddy,” she said, so quietly she could barely hear herself. “Please…”

But he just stared at her with that hard look in his eyes, and pointed to his lap.

“I’ll be a good girl,” she whispered. “I promise.”

“I know you will,” he said calmly. “I’m going to make sure of it.”

She started to cry. "I'm sorry!" she wailed.

"I'm sure you are, baby," said her Daddy, guiding her over his lap with her bare bum facing up, "and a sore, red bottom is going to help you remember that sorriness."

It did. Fifteen minutes later, Juliana was bawling her eyes out over his knees, kicking her legs and shrieking, her blazing red bottom jiggling with every smack. "DOBBIT DADDY!" she sobbed, her words barely audible through her tears. "P'EASE! I BE A GOO' GIWL!"

"Are you going to wear what I tell you to wear without any fussing?"

"YES, DADDY!"

"Are you going to throw anymore tantrums about going out in public?"

"NO, DADDY! I P'OMISE!"

And then it was over. In a few moments, Juliana was flipped around, and she was being cuddled in her boyfriend's arms, getting her aching bum-cheeks caressed with tender fingers. "That's my good girl," her Daddy crooned. "That's my little angel. We'll go out and do a little bit of shopping together once I've got you dressed again, okay? I want to get some new shirts, and you need more diapers." He kissed away a tear on her cheek. “Then we’ll get ice cream. How does that sound?”

Juliana hiccupped. “Can I put it on my bottom to cool it down?”

Her Daddy laughed. “No baby, ice cream is for eating. But I’ll put something soothing on your bum when we get home, okay?”

“Okay, Daddy.”

“Good girl.”

He kissed her on the lips and she kissed him back enthusiastically, desperately. Her hands reached for his belt, but he laughed again and brushed them gently aside. “That will have to wait until after we get back too, baby."

She made an indistinct fussy noise. She felt so needy. She didn’t want to wait that long... But Daddy was sure to get even more turned on by the sight of her walking around town with her nappy showing. Maybe she could convince him to change her in a public toilet, and while they were there...

After a bit more cuddling, she allowed him to tape her back into her soggy nappy and pull her shorts over them once again. Despite the public humiliation she knew she was about to endure, despite the throbbing pain in her buttocks and the feeling of pee sloshing about in her pants, she smiled as he took her by the hand and led her out the front door. She loved her Daddy so, so much.

[andypantsx3]

Say andie what makes the booktok recs unreadable for you?

It’s the absolute cringeyness for me

Lol setting aside how rich it is for me to give any critique when I'm sure I could not do half as well as any booktok author... For me there are two things that make me put down a book: 1) the prose, and 2) unoriginality.

Last night I immediately DNFed a book I'd just acquired because the prose was so instantly dense in what felt (to me at least) like the most try-hard way. I can't quite articulate exactly what I mean as it's more of a feeling, but you know when you can sort of sense a style is not someone's natural style? Ordinarily I don't mind rich prose (I love, like, Elizabeth Kostova and damn can that lady go on). But this felt like the author was specifically endeavoring to sound poetic where simple language would have served better and it sounded unnatural. :/

And, if I may be a shit and complain further, the author set about info-dumping all their world building without even giving us anything (like a character or stakes) to invest in yet. I know some people love that but personally it doesn't work for me. I have to be convinced to read, and if you don't draw me in with some initial investment I find it harder to stick around.

And yeah also originality!! I did not have that particular problem with the book I made the post about, but I do with a lot of booktok recs. I find that a lot of what I enjoy in fanfic (lingering in well-loved tropes, re-exploring certain source materials over and over) is not what I'm looking for in my pubbed fiction. I will not name any particular books because I do not want to yuck anyone's yum but a lot of booktok books these days feel like recycled versions of other books and don't add anything fresh or interesting to the conversation. And it bums me out because I do like material that feels familiar, but I want to see it stitched together in a different pattern, you know??

Anywayyyyyyy that's enough from me. I'm so curious what factors go into "cringiness" though! I wonder if they are similar? What makes a book feel "cringey" to you?