#yousta rhymes

[yousta]

Going from the feeling of being reduced to feining for meaning

Darling found me like a broken clock at the right time

Hearts in your eyes when you stalk mine

Feel like a blue moon if it could talk the way you shine

[yousta]

You get me so high, so high I can touch the sky.

I'm never left wondering questioning why.

You're the answer to my life.

Resolved me entirely as my wife.

Every day was all grey

I'll never forget how it ended so quick

Never knew it could be so majestic

Babe, you make the best pic

An image of love like a mirror but clearer

Best moment in my life

I'm still thinking so cute

Sweet like strawberries and fruit

[yousta]

I love you dearly

with every word said sincerely

others didn't hear me,

didn't want near me.

Yet you call me charming?

Oh Darling,

I know you're not just being theatrical

The way you look at me is actual

I couldn't confuse you.

People call themselves being real

but they'll disregard how you feel

Group together like a fifth wheel

I guess we don't go for the spiel

It's a common slip.

but I got the grip

they believe that shit coming out their lip.

Shooting up the vanity fair

with logic cause I'm self aware

say like who are you to compare?

When I'm with her.

I feel my pain wither

My city's so lame no game

Finding one to care is rare

Finding one to stop and stare

with love as the expression they wear

Well that's my love I swear

Caring to make one understand

that's what true love's about

Silence to that inner doubt

I love my home,

Remember no one in my phone

Spent years, drowning alone in tears

I believed I was too far out in the water

and I said to myself no one's coming for ya

Thinking on the words I meant,

Yeah right here you're heaven sent

got the lovely text you sent

I wouldn't change how it went

I'm here and feel so content

I can justify time spent

I define and leave a dent

out shine those with the heart bent 

[yousta]

Was it written on your soul,

or is it who you are as a whole?

Your heart transposing art

You love with so much intention

brings out my best attention

Beyond my old me's comprehension

People said they loved me

If it was empathy then where was the remedy

Self absorbed people never asked my day or interests

I only remembered indifference

Memory and perception corrupted

So I took aim

put a gun to my brain

Who are you to blame

Salt and sugar look the same

And I never got close enough to name

My will akin to a dying flame

So alone,

self esteem was determined by strangers acting grown

No father, I came to these conclusions on my own 

[yousta]

I couldn't let it decay

I never want us to go away

Wasn't the best today

But that's okay

Not a word more I wanna say

I'm always with you every which way

We bond over obsession and the true love shared between us

Beautifully cute standing on time,

hyper in the eye tilting her face smirking at mine.

She's all mine, thinking overwise would be my literal demise

[yousta]

"I don't wanna talk about who we were at 17.

My heart's broke.

Show me what love means."

I got just that it seems.

Woke up mistaking this for my dreams.

From playing it back in my mind,

I just needed you there everytime,

and everything would've been fine.

Instead of on my own,

No one I could call in my phone.

In the end I found out who I am,

outside the isolation but god damn

With others,

the way I felt,

they'd make me regret it,

but you in a summer set.

Eyes in a dead set silhouette.

Was too good to forget.

Always forever here and now.

I hope this never ends somehow.

Like in reality,

I want to live forever,

but in everyway I am.

We exchange cute love spam.

Every day, I wanna hold her hand.

[yousta]

I know it's real cause I don't have to guess

They'd never make me feel you less

I swear they hate on me then act so clueless,

but I'm speaking with a certainty in my chest.

What do they do that's supposed to impress?

The longing and distance they inspire in the rest?

The clothes wearing them when they dress?

Fuck boy, your "bitch" look like a lizard. Yes!

Cold blooded reptiles aren't what I caress.

Darling I feel the love your eyes express.

You could be the only thing I possess

Having you is the only thing I obsess

Woke up this morning and felt like it was the best

I know they want me forever broken and depressed, but how could I feel pressed?

I just got your good morning text. 

[yousta]

Hajime no ippo Sendo pose

Moving while unconscious like rock lee and the bros

I see a mirage and the gas tanks been empty

God and the desert surround me

You know all about me

Made of light or electricity

Some water past infinity,

you whisper you're still into me

You're all around me

I'm not alone this time

love of mine

I'm dying this time

dying on my feet over mine

no greater shine

I'm not scared

I feel my heart and soul

what about losing?

When you look away, and stay silent.

In reality a complex unfolds

(Crying)

Good and evil are dressed in these robes

I like to think I didn't hurt people

Curled up this time, she truly holds me

I walked on many to get here

Would I be nice or not?

Cut me some slack

(sobbing)

here I came clean and true

I loved a few

but it's only you

All for you

If I promised you forever

I meant you forever

I love you

[yousta]

All this shortbread, THC, and dry tea

Got all these people hating on me

But the neighbors know my name

so I'm doing something right

They mom's know my name,

and homies know my name

so I'm doing something right

and their girlfriends know my name,

I don't care for those who'd delude me

Like mine already understand

I don't give a damn, She's only mine

A fan can go at the band

Like I already know, I seen them at my show

banging out You I Us all day

Hope you only kill to protect

which gets that murder respect

I didn't die for your sin

but I'll die trying to knock your head back in

Don't make mines acts up

She get real mad

Lil dude you love to bitch

You're not it

That's my girl

She's under my cover

We cuddle and shit

I don't love my blood brother unless I think about it

Why would I?

He'd trade his brother and truth to put me down

I'm in the sun shining my pride though

Someone told me to lay low

Huh? Swear we not the same no

You say that shit it's on go

and I see what you main though

Realness gets in your brain yo

Yeah it's your toxic world view

I don't want to go near you

You like to bitch I'm see through

I've been bedhead they still let me in

We still make love even when

We eat around our place, win

I am not up at your fall

I'm always up you're never up at all

Truth's open, lies are conceit

I'm not what any decent one would reject

I died for all my brothers

Talk to me with some respect

Dead vibes fall flat no effect

I feel so much better here

but that's not what you'd project

We lived I died like a saint

Their Heart soul and mind don't yet connect

You ain't shit let alone my brothers

The light in which you like yourself to shine

only exists by diminishing mine

Put yourself up but have a reason you believe in

your feelings are in

I love my girlfriend

I'd never want her to fade

I've seen that's something you'd trade

You bitch behind yours back

don't mention addressing anything direct

Heard you talk yourself up all angry.

I don't wonder how that convo went with no empathy.

It's ugh have you ever heard of vanity?

I will say that bout you,

Let me tell you bout me

My girl got attitude,

but she talks me through

and gets all lovey too

Swear baby I can't really get mad at you.

cause I love this shit and you're the baddest too

Pull up with the boo

Up this shit at your whole crew

You can smell the gas leaking through

My Diamonds gold shine like Pikachu

Hit like thunderbolt

I swear how that shit was told

Tie it in, see me shine,

Bitch I am the center fold

Hit the woods like Zeref

Thought like they care, as if.

Made dudes stealing shit take off and run.

Crying some shit like oh no he's got a gun

[yousta]

As it currently stands

I don't wanna talk I could live forever here

Feeling infinity and warmth flowing through me

Looking back on frozen slides of time

The ones that shine

Make me sad more than mad

If I had pride, felt why you cried

I might look at you teary eyed

And say, "Awwe you poor thing, who made you feel this way?" Soft as I could wanting to know why,

To "Who made you cry?" Real big tantrum, someone gonna die.

Everyone's around you is self deluded

I don't think you intend on saving anyone,

but when you do know you should be included.

in the ones you wanna save.

or they'll just be mourning at your grave

You have the right to serve anyone

There were times I couldn't sort through

Couldn't cope through, I was alone too

So alone,

I'd blame the world past a cold stare or angry tone.

Didn't receive much praise at home.

Outside I accepted my own

but that bullshit was all we had ever known.

If one were there to care by changing it.

We could've grown

We could've reaped what we've sown.

Hehe this is a leak for a track I've been working on for a month now :3 figured I'd spam everyone's feed tonight with some of what hasn't been released. I've been going hard at the writing and music lately. I've been working on the song for over a month now, it's been hard to balance between work and studying. Might drop more soon :) thanks for all the support. Between random likes and my girlfriend it's felt encouraging enough to justify posting. Regardless these are the words I've put blood sweat and tears in. Holding these beliefs has always felt comforting and brought me strength. I know it's not always fun being lovesick or anything like that. So this is my heart goes out to you guys here. Hope I can help bring the yandere up.

[yousta]

Words I can't extend, but if it's an ear you'll lend. I would like to attend to the notion you're a loose end cause you codepend. Watch these self fulfilling prophecies, cause in the end. I see someone who doesn't need just another "friend".

You let them truly get to you and never play pretend. So I empathize when you go off the deep end, cause it's true love that you intend, but you too have a heart that can bend. Know you don't have to fix everything or make amends,

In the text I want to send, It's your love I want to defend. Someone like you was more than I could comprehend, cause through you and every word you extend. It's time I spend, knowing I can transcend living for whatever on the weekend.

[yousta]

Waking up beside her through dawn. I yawn, wondering what planet I'm on, cause I'm gone. So far removed from the same old song.

Found where I belong, we're mutually drawn. The adoring was pouring at 7 o'clock in the morning. No alarms. Just sweet soft spoken charms, "I would die in your arms."

No mistaking, she's not faking, and the love has me shaking I love what you bring, I love how you cling, Yes you're the sweetest thing.

Success? Yes! I woke up and did my best! Took out my ex's heart out my chest. Caught up on my rest, and I'm feeling expressed! It was worth the wait, to see her eyes dilate.

To you and a past me. Someday you'll relate, and you'll learn to move the weight you place, live to see heaven on their face.

Oh I know how you've tried, you've tried and tried, but if right now you can decide you're satisfied. No regrets after being denied, well that'd make anyone's eyes wide, cause all of them never replied. Never recognized what was inside, was a place to confide.

My memory never let it go after your blood dried, it's something to cry about, and I've cried at the thought of your suic!de. Your heart I couldn't hide, my heart you couldn't hide. No one by our side.

Lost my appetite, couldn't sleep, didn't eat for a week. I write, "who knows how it goes?". So starved, the cold night hammered nails in the joints of my fingers and toes.

No bright blinding light, or tunnels to gates of white. Nothing made it seem like it'd ever be alright, somehow we hung on tight. Thank goodness we did cause here it's alright. and someday. It might all decay,

but by the end of this arc, when their souls embark. We'll follow them straight through the dark. Live to make that spark from their heart. I promise it'll make the purest art.

[yousta]

I didn't think any would ever truly understand.

Learned if they try that's all that matters in the end.

When dad was dying I tried to kill myself at ten. 

Taking sips off the end, I felt the damage. Tried to do that shit again.

Many times I tried to vent just to feel irrelevant, but if I said what I meant.

I was feeling my intent, more than if I wrote it on cement. 

If it tore a ligament, I'd live forever and feel content. 

It ain't over till you're spent. They'll have to wonder where you went, but recieve a text on sent. 

My love inspires something different. Ever since we've met, I wonder if I was dead, would I have never received the best? You felt everything I've said. I'm forever in your debt.

It just isn't over yet!

I feel everything, I'd live forever with no regret!

[yousta]

Pulling up absolute and I commit.

I want to be cute, and throw a fit.

No one cared when I was quiet.

Or starving myself for a diet.

My old Friends think growing up is pain,

but Love was the only thing on my brain.

So you know it was all the same.

I was a good boy too so chances are I would've really loved you.

Felt like the whole world was in on some joke at my expense.

My love for you grew too immense, until you said it was too intense.

I'd try to say i could hold my love for you but when you said it was through.

I didn't think I had anymore love to give, or there be a life I'd want to live.

I cried screamed and begged like a child, but I was a grown man looking wild.

By this point heartbreak piled, and I couldn't remember the last time I had smiled.

I wanted to maintain my style, but when I lost my smile. I only thought good things take awhile.

I'd rather not believe and die in denial.

My shattered hopes and mountain of prayers unheard,

didn't make it easy to believe a single word.

Yet somehow I clinged on.

When it was pathetic and you probably thought any mention of you in my head was gone.

I was still singing that same old song about just wanting a place to belong.

I was glad I met the person I did.

You said you would've loved me as a kid.

I'm glad my hero showed up when you did.-

[yousta]

Terrible thoughts I hoard, inspired from the memories of people I've stored. For a long time I've felt ignored, but she seamlessly strikes a chord.

Relatable like it's coming out my vocal cord, and intentionally cuts through my pain like a sword. Straight through the vertebrae in my spinal cord, never blunt like it came from an extension cord.

She makes me feel adored. Never bored, all depths of the mind explored. Controlled by no lord, demonic like I'm stepping on checkerboard.

It's bright and white, the future we move toward. Hey darling, my heart has been restored. Got your voice on record for my little reward, secret photos of you on my dashboard.

I still love you on my own accord, still stalking you in the all black ford, so I know the love from your heart you've poured is true, and it makes me love you<3

I wrote this poem alongside my lovely girlfriend @your-thorn

[yousta]

She's the only thing that comes to mind.

The only thing to shine

But I'm not going blind

she shoots me out my mind,

like a 9-millimeter carbine

Darling wrote her dream life on her shrine, with the devil's details signed

Pure love defined and outlined, and it appears I'm entwined

Lovestruck and holds me when I whine

She's mine all mine, hard find by his design,

I love my one of a kind

Who'd never leave me behind.