#youra Single

[ohsharethekmusic]

Song : L 

Artist : 015B & youra

Album {Single} : L

[gwojo]

can i love?

FEATURING: Megumi Fushiguro (伏黒恵)

megumi x reader, angst no comfort, reader uses they/them prns, non-sorcerer au, around age 18-19, just plain angst. (sorry) wordcount: 1,187

SUMMARY: In which, you've been admiring someone named Megumi Fushiguro around the 5th grade until college which turns out to be the present. you see others already resonating with their loved ones but what about you? will you just keep desiring to have a connection with him? 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚎𝚜 : this is heavily inspired by the song "Can I love ?" which feats. youra, Meego) by cosmic boy! which tells about unrequited love and the desire to connect with them while at the same time being unsure of what your relationship is to someone, and the desires to be happy like others. I advise u listen to it while reading!

in my dream I remember the moment I was standing one step behind you.

You weren't always remembered as a person; you were just an ordinary student, which you deemed to yourself, and you promised that you'd stay like that forever. not until you met the boy named "Fushiguro Megumi."

After the occurrence between you both, accidentally spilling your ice cream on him when you were children and mumbling apologies as quick as you could, he helped you up before even wiping away the sticky texture in his jacket as he left you there staring, not even muttering a single word to you. Fortunately, that was the day you started to look for him wherever you went. Your parents thought it was just a silly crush you had when you were a child, but as the years passed, they started to see that it was actually a serious type of love for you.

You would always see him passing by whenever you went out at exactly 7:40 to go to school, which is around the block. You wait around the window before going outside, almost tripping the way down there, so you could walk at least 5 steps away from his back just to admire the way his face turns when he talks to his friends and the way he just walks quietly. As you began to admire and daydream by walking with him every day,

Your daydream stops when you realize you're already at your destination, the entrance of the school. As you shake your head and go inside, hoping for another better day,.

Why do your faces all say that I'm unhappy

As you sit on the bench beside the soccer field, with your friends giggling and talking about how their crushes or boyfriends are giving butterflies to their stomachs, you, on the other end, just smile and laugh while also realizing how far you are from him—feeling upset and empty, you stood up to get a drink from the vending machine while telling your friends you'll leave for a while.

On the way there, you couldn't help but stop thinking. The feeling of being judged for not being able to achieve the same level of happiness as others is truly terrifying but hurtful at the same time. You were always just admiring him from afar; you doubt he even knows you despite you both being in the same class, and you just wish you'd have a connection or at least a relationship with him, even if it's just friends.

You scoff at yourself and think how pathetic it is to even assume he knows your name whenever you guys are paired together with other people and to think that he's your friend. is just truly pathetic, as you think to yourself.

You weren't just passing by, just brushing past

Even if you keep reminding yourself that you and him have more to their dynamic and relationship than just a fleeting moment, you reflect your hopes of being somewhat of a person to him somehow. The lingering feeling of your beating heart but pain can be felt in another way; you still hold on to that feeling and want to ask him countless questions.

But.. you couldn't. You were uncertain of how he feels about you or even if he notices you when you anonymously give him chocolates without revealing your identity to him. He didn't even know you. So why be stupid and think that he'll like you back? You mutter to yourself as you plop yourself in bed, just staring at the ceiling, waiting for another day to arrive to celebrate the party at school.

You were sitting on the floor quietly while your friends rambled and had fun beside you. You really appreciated them sticking by you even in your hard times, and you thank them for that. The president then calls everyone in the classroom to gather around and sit in a circle to play a game called truth or dare. Countless people have taken their turn playing the game and answering questions, some doing silly things their friends have told them when they chose truth or dare. As you zoned out, not until you heard his voice choosing "truth" as the other people asked him what his type was, you waited eagerly for his answer while your heart was beating as quickly, hoping for an answer that could be related to you.

"Someone with an unshakeable character."

You heard his deep but calm toned voice, your heart slowly stopped beating in a fast rate. You scoff to yourself in your mind as you reminisce about the things you've imaged and did.. the remaining hopes of you which lingers everyday comes to an end. Unshakeable? you doubted that would be you, you were always scared of everything and doubtful towards yourself, maybe he truly didn't know you and your assumptions and doubts were right and won. You couldn't stop the burning pain in your heart and almost swollen eyes with tears were threatening to fall as you quickly told your friends if you could go home since "your relative needed some help" as you lied to them just to get away. You walked the way home, it wasn't the cliché scene where you get heartbroken and it was raining, in fact no, it wasn't raining at all.. it was just sunny and bright with clouds and the sun almost going away.

I don't know what kind of relationship we had

You slowly admired and got lost in the skies while you walked through the bridge with trees and leaves falling down, cars passing by and bicycles with lovers giggling to each other saying how they're about to fall.. You didn't run whenever you felt upset, you didn't cry at home, no, not at all—you didn't even cry because you felt like you couldn't anymore, you didn't expect much but it still hurts knowing very clear that he doesn't know you are.

You were quiet the way back home, just admiring everything slowly and accepting that you were hurt.. because what could you do about it? he won't reciprocate your feelings toward him and that was fine even if you admired him for years. You felt surprisingly okay with a hint of pain in your heart, small tears fell down while you smiled at the beauty of the blue and pink skies.. Accepting the way you felt was okay and that you won't be able to feel the stage of happiness everyone feels in this world, it was okay, you were okay.

Okay with the feeling of the in denial feeling that you will never feel the happiness that others feel, with their loved ones and crushes; the way their smiles light up in happiness just to see them as they walk together to their destinations.. as you sigh slowly.

As you put on your playlist and chose the song "can i love ?" by cosmic boy, and just giggled realizing how much you relate to the song.. maybe it isn't so bad speaking or feeling the pain and uncertainty that comes with wanting to connect with someone who may not feel the same way.

You always wanted to run and ask him, confess your apparently "dying" love to him as you rant to your friends.. but right now, you just felt like keeping it to yourself.

"Can I love? You?"

reblogs are appreciated! thank you for reading.

— © gwojo 2023. pls i advise u not to share on tiktok, plagiarize, repost on other platforms, copy, or translate.

[mellometal]

QI.X's debut single "Lights Up" (the studio version) is now out on streaming platforms! The link is below their cover art. (For anyone wondering about YOURA, they're on hiatus to try finding themself. Prin, Maek, and JiGOOK have all asked everyone to respect YOURA's decision.)

K-Pop idols, groups, and/or soloists that are openly LGBT are difficult to come by. Please support QI.X! If anyone's interested, I'll be making a Spotify playlist of every single K-Pop idol, group, and soloist who are openly LGBT that I can find.

Enjoy. ^.^

[yeongwonie]

lost cause — yang jungwon

tags. high school au, friends(?) to lovers, slow burn warnings. cursing, one mention of piss 

word count. 8.5k

note. thank u in advance for reading! i’m kind of nervous about posting this but i hope you enjoy and look forward to more writing from me in the future :))

playlist. MIMI by youra, 몰랐어 (just a little bit) by enhypen, 긴밤 by seori ft. GIRIBOY

masterlist

SYNOPSIS. since your brief friendship with your crush, yang jungwon, ended in radio silence, you’ve been determined to keep him at arm’s length. jungwon, convinced that you’ve grown to hate him during your months of disconnection, is equally as determined to win you back.

IT’S ALMOST TOO EASY, FALLING for Yang Jungwon.

Between the way his dimples poke into his cheeks when even a hint of a smile crosses his face and the sound of his laughter breaking through the murmur of the cafeteria every so often, the amount of time you spend reminiscing such menial details shows how much of a chokehold the boy has on your mind.

Even in the classroom, he’s diligent and well-spoken in a way that can only be described as admirable. Although the two of you are now freshly seniors, he’s been a shoo-in for class president quite literally since your first year. Although you’re always at the top of the class rank, Jungwon is never far behind, and one semester, he’d even taken the top spot for a few weeks.

Not only does he excel in every subject, but he’s also insanely sociable, which is something you lack. Your mind drifts back to the prior Valentine’s day, when the poor underclassman volunteer had spent 10 minutes handing out his candy grams alone. Or the day he’d gotten a homecoming proposal during every single passing period. It’s honestly a miracle the popularity hasn’t inflated his ego.

You’d formally met Jungwon two years prior when you’d been partnered together for a history project. Initially, literal chills had shot up your spine when the pairings were announced.

You were terrified that Jungwon would slack off and leave you to do all the work, or worse, that he’d be the nicest person ever and you’d let him down and he’d never want to work with you ever again. The two of you ended up talking for hours over a video call the same night, long after the project had been finished.

Three weeks later, you’d realized your feelings. In your mind, putting distance between you and him was the best solution. Jungwon was all kinds of unattainable, and you almost felt bad every time you texted him, the little voice in the back of your mind telling you that he had more important things to be doing and that you were a hindrance.

Your relationship dwindled down to waves in the hallway, then to brief eye contact, then nothing at all. You doubt you even passed the classmate-zone in his mind.

Nothing much changes, when you and Jungwon stop talking. You both continue your studies, you and him remain at the top of your class rankings, and you push your feelings aside.

You spend a year completely fine without having Jungwon in any of your classes to distract you, and the second you’re sat next to him, you fall back into your old ways.

In the year that you don’t speak, Yang Jungwon gets all the more intelligent. Unfortunately, his intelligence also comes with a keen sense of observation. You can’t stare at his side profile, one seat away, without him noticing.

You find this out slightly too late.

“Need something?” he inquires, with a smile so polite it almost hurts.

It’s so weird speaking to him again, with the thick curtain of awkwardness strung up between the two of your chairs. You feel more like a student asking a teacher for help with a math problem than a classmate talking to another.

“Oh, um. I’m good, Sorry,” you stutter out, turning your head back to stare down at your notes so quickly you almost get whiplash.

Five minutes ago, your teacher had seated you next to Jungwon, and not even halfway into the class period, you already want to move.

The said teacher walks to the front of the room and addresses the class with a tight-lipped smile.

“Tell the person sitting next to you about one fun thing you did over break,” she says, then promptly sits at her desk and opens a book. You’re not surprised; the first day of school means playing random icebreakers in every single period, even though your entire class has known each other for years now.

Slowly, you turn back around to face Jungwon, forcing your eyes to meet his. You’re only able to hold his sharp gaze for a few seconds before fixing your stare on your fiddling hands.

“Do you want me to go first?” Jungwon mercifully asks (although you feel slightly ashamed, knowing he sensed your discomfort).

“Sure.”

“I just started a few college applications, but I think that’s about it,” he chuckles.

You nod; probably 99% of your classmates are saying the same thing, which is why your teacher’s choice in question is so ridiculous.

“And I played with my dog.”

“Aww, that’s nice, where are you applying?” you ask, smiling softly at the last comment. He’s still as endearing as ever, unfortunately.

“The usual, I guess. SNU, Daegu, Gwangju. I applied to a couple in the U.S. too, but I doubt I’ll even get in.”

“Of course you’ll get in, I can totally see you at Harvard or something,” you smile. You don’t even have to lie, if anyone can get into such a prestigious school, it’s your class president.

“I think you think too highly of me,” he says, finally breaking the one-sided eye contact to glance up at the front of the classroom. “What about you, where are you applying?”

Your conversation continues until the end of the period, with Jungwon picking up all of the slack that you leave in your nervous state. Eventually, your comments start to flow more naturally, as they had those months ago through the FaceTime call plastered in your head to this day.

It’s sort of unfair, the way he makes you feel like he actually cares about what major you’re planning on pursuing, giving you false hope that this could turn into something more. That’s what everyone else thinks, you suppose, and then they end up as one of the discarded candy grams or the homecoming posters sitting in the trash.

So yes, it’s way too easy, falling for Jungwon, especially when you know firsthand that getting over him is one of the hardest feats in the world.

☆☆☆☆☆

YANG JUNGWON CAN’T FIGURE OUT why you dislike him.

He would even consider you a friend, despite the distinct lack of interactions between you two, save for that one history project a year or so back. You had been surprisingly easy to talk to, and Jungwon would be lying if he said he wasn’t at least a little sad when your conversations grew drier and eventually subsided.

He knows the two of you were buried in work, thanks to the ever-looming prospect of college applications on the horizon during your junior year. But still, it wouldn’t hurt for you to not act like he’d hit your dog with a car every time you make eye contact.

Jungwon knows what you’re normally like. He’s seen you with your friends; how you act when you don’t think he’s watching you. But the second your eyes meet his, your posture stiffens and your face twists into discomfort, as though being within a one-meter radius of him is equivalent to being dunked head first into a tub of ice water.

Sure, there are plenty of people with valid reasons for hating him, he thinks. People who project their insecurities about their grades or their social life onto him, who paint him out to be some perfect valedictorian golden boy. Or the people he’d had to reject in the weeks leading up to homecoming (he had nothing against them personally, honestly, but he’d have felt too bad choosing one person out of dozens he really didn’t know that well, and there was no way having 20 dates to homecoming would go well).

But, you don’t seem to be either of those things. Your own grades are pretty good, good enough to rival his own, and there’s a distinct lack of your name on all of the love letters he’s received in the past few years.

“I’m sure they don’t hate you, Jungwon,” Heeseung says. The older boy bumps his shoulder, breaking him out of his daze as his eyes continue following you down the hallway. It’s a little scary that Heeseung knows what he’s thinking, although he’s sure the way his eyes trace over your every step makes it a little more obvious.

“I don’t know. What if they’re mad that we stopped talking?”

“Didn’t you say it was mutual? I’m sure they understand how busy you were—they were probably just as busy.”

“I guess,” Jungwon’s voice trails off as he readjusts the strap of his book bag on his shoulder like a soldier, bracing for combat. In long, measured strides, he follows you into the classroom, making sure to greet the teacher standing by the door with a kind smile before scanning the room.

Jungwon’s a little scared to choose a seat. You’re probably the only person he’s had more than one sentence of exchange with in this class, but the months of radio silence between the two of you has built you up in his mind to be some sort of intimidating shadow figure.

Typically he’d just pick another seat, branch out, make new friends. But, at every single other pair of seats, there is at least one girl who has sent him a candy gram or sent him a love letter or even confessed in person in the last 24 months. There are still empty seats, but somehow leaving his partner for the rest of the year up to the hands of fate seems even more formidable.

Basically, Jungwon spends about 45 seconds standing at the front of the classroom, doing mental gymnastics to justify taking the seat next to you, before his legs actually walk him towards where you sit.

As he sets his book bag down and slides into the metal chair, he feels your eyes flit over his frame. Steeling himself, Jungwon turns to face you, but you’re already looking away, hyperfocused on the whiteboard, then the teacher, then the clock ticking on the wall.

He doesn’t know if he’s relieved or terrified when the teacher announces an icebreaker activity. On one hand, it’s the perfect opportunity to talk to you and prove that he’s not the asshole he’s sure you see him as. On the other hand, something about the way you purse your lips at the announcement is insanely intimidating, and a flash of doubt shoots again through his mind.

But he refuses to let this period go to waste. Yang Jungwon will not spend the entire period sitting in awkward silence, especially when the conversation had once flowed so easily. Hesitantly, he begins, telling you briefly about what he’d done over the summer break.

By the end of the period, Jungwon has to bite back a wide grin now that you’re talking to him again. He’s not sure why this fact relieves him as much as it does, maybe you’re a representation of simpler times in his mind, when he wasn’t so worried about the future (or maybe he just missed talking to you).

By the time the boy waves goodbye to you and steps back out into the hallway, he has only one goal in mind. Jungwon is determined to become friends with you again, even if it takes him until graduation.

☆☆☆☆☆

TWO DAYS LATER, YOU DON’T think you’re making any progress. Jungwon is still cute, and you still want to rip your hair out every time his eyes meet yours.

You tell yourself you no longer care what he thinks about you, yet you start waking up earlier and taking extra care while buttoning your uniform and tying your tie in the mornings. The thought of walking into your literature class fills your stomach with equal parts of excitement and dread.

Tapping your foot slowly against the tile flooring of the classroom, you keep your eyes focused straight forward. You’re almost militant about avoiding eye contact with Jungwon unless absolutely necessary now.

You feel a nudge against your shoulder.

“Do you want me to share the lab notes with you?” Jungwon asks, bearing his signature smile. Your brain is split in half between wanting to poke his cheeks and wanting to scream in frustration.

“Yeah. Thank you,” you reply stiffly, missing the way the corners of his mouth drop just a fraction.

You open your laptop with one hand, then grab a pencil in the other. Today’s classwork is relatively easy, typing out observations on some pictures of various plants under a microscope. Your fingers switch between flying across your keyboard and writing in your notebook as your mind drifts elsewhere.

“Woah, that looks so cool. Can you teach me?” Jungwon murmurs, his voice cutting through the daze of your tired brain so early in the morning.

You stare at him, then down at your hands, finally realizing you’d been spinning your pencil. As you look down, Jungwon winces in embarrassment, letting what he’d said replay in his head. He probably sounded like an idiot, and now you’d ask the teacher to move seats and ignore him for the rest of the year.

“Um, yeah. I learned it from a Youtube video like three years ago, so I might not be the best teacher.”

Positioning your pencil in your hand (and praying the slight quivering of your fingers isn’t visible), you look down at Jungwon’s hands to make sure he’s copying you. You demonstrate how to bend your fingers to make the pencil spin around, then stifle a laugh as he fails on his first, second, third, and fourth attempts at following suit.

“Here,” you say, adjusting his grip on the pencil with a feather-light touch.

Jungwon swallows before attempting to give the pencil a slow spin. The grin makes its way back across his face as the pencil actually moves instead of flying out of his grip.

“There you go,” you smile, turning back to continue typing on the document. Jungwon’s eyes linger on your profile for just a second more before he, too, returns to his work.

While you sigh, frustrated at your lack of success less than a week into the school year (because despite your efforts, the feel of Jungwon’s hands against your own was definitely still enough to make your heart race), the boy seated next to you replays the memory of your fingers brushing against his own.

Jungwon thinks that if things continue like this, you’ll be best friends by the end of the month.

☆☆☆☆☆

BY THE NINTH DAY OF your senior year, you are wholeheartedly convinced your literature teacher is trying to kill you.

“Who the hell assigns a partner project one week into the school year?” you scoff under your breath, copying down the rubric into your notebook and pressing extra hard with your pencil into the paper out of spite.

Thankfully, the period ends right after your teacher, Mrs. Park, gives her announcement. You need a little time to process the situation before you can even think about facing your seatmate. Jungwon thinks about staying with you after class for a bit, just to discuss what time you’ll work on your slideshow and script, but you’re already rushing out the door.

He’s a bit disappointed, but you seem frantic to get to your next period. And besides, he has a whole week to talk to you and get the project sorted out. Jungwon lets himself worry for the five minutes between class periods, then moves on.

☆☆☆☆☆

“I THINK YOU SHOULD TRY just being friends,” Sunoo suggests later that day, completely aware that your gaze has been stuck on Jungwon for the past 10 minutes. Even though you and Jungwon have been speaking more and more in class and you’re now able to hold a conversation without picking at your nails or bouncing your leg frenetically, you’re sure a literary analysis project will undo any progress you’ve made.

“Yeah, because being friends with Jungwon turned out so well for me last time,” you groan, rubbing your eyes with the palms of your hands.

“I don’t know, it could be like exposure therapy or something. I just don’t think this whole ignoring him and then screaming at me over the phone about how cute he is every night is working. I could be wrong, though.” At this, you shove him in the arm, causing his light chuckles to turn to full-on giggles.

“I don’t scream about him,” you protest, brows furrowing as your friend eyes you sideways before turning back to his food.

“Sure, and I don’t have pink hair,” Sunoo sighs as you stab at your rice with your pair of chopsticks. “Don’t you think you’re, like, putting him on a pedestal? That boy is literally a puppy dog. The little white ones with the crusty eyes.”

You know Sunoo’s right. He knows you know he’s right, too, and he’s way too smug about your clear internal conflict.

“Maybe you’re right. People always say you can’t be friends with someone you’re attracted to, so maybe if we become friends I’ll finally get over it.”

“I don’t think that’s what that means, but yeah!”

Deep down, you know it won’t be such a simple fix. But, you also feel incredibly guilty, meeting Jungwon’s attempts at conversation with terse replies and avoiding his gaze at all costs.

Across the cafeteria, Jungwon is having an incredibly similar conversation.

When he tells Lee Heeseung about his predicament, his senior stares at him for a solid 30 seconds.

“Hey, are you gonna give me advice, or what?” Jungwon complains, waving a hand in front of the elder’s face.

“Sorry, I just don’t see what the issue is. Your project partner isn’t making enough eye contact with you?”

“Stop making me sound stupid. I want things to go back to normal. Y/N and I used to just click, but now they’re acting like we barely know each other,” he says. Heeseung eyes the younger boy, whose brows are drawing closer together, skeptically.

“I don’t know, from what you’ve told me it just sounds kind of awkward. But that’s pretty normal, you guys haven’t spoken in a long time.”

Jungwon’s brow furrows even more.

“Okay, here’s what you’re gonna do.” Heeseung pulls out a spiral-bound notebook and tears a page of lined paper from the binding. After rummaging for a pen and uncapping it, he begins to write:

“1. text Y/N about the project

2. invite them on a study date”

“Date?” Jungwon interjects, and Heeseung rolls his eyes. He adds “(platonic)” onto the end of the line before continuing.

“3. get an A

4. go out to celebrate somewhere

5. friends!!”

Heeseung finishes the list with an obscene amount of smiley faces after the final step before sliding the paper over to the boy next to him. Jungwon regrets asking for help in the first place.

“Thanks, I guess. I was going to do most of this anyway.”

Heeseung flicks Jungwon’s forehead, then stands and stretches out his legs. “No way, you probably would’ve gotten nervous and then done the entire thing by yourself.”

“No, I swear. Here, watch,” Jungwon whispers as he sees you approaching the same doors. He tugs Heeseung by the arm through the swarms of his classmates, eyes never leaving you. Once he’s close enough, he sets the first phase of the plan into motion. His hands are only a little bit sweaty as they fiddle behind his back.

“Hi, Y/N” he calls out, adding a small wave.

His bright voice makes your head snap up. When your eyes finally fall on his face, you want to bang your head against a wall.

“Hi, Jungwon,” you reply before remembering what Sunoo had told you. “Do you wanna start planning out our presentation tonight?”

“Yeah, that would be great,” He’s a little shocked (but even more relieved) that you’re carrying out his part of the plan all on your own. “I’ll text you?”

“Sounds good.”

After a momentary pause, you continue on your path to your math class, thinking about looking back at Jungwon’s retreating form but never actually doing so because you still have some little sliver of self-control.

Jungwon grins at Heeseung, who gives him a thumbs up. The list remains safely in his pocket.

☆☆☆☆☆

AT 10:13 PM, JUNGWON SITS on his duvet and kneads his lower lip between his teeth. Your contact is open, the last message sent from over a year ago glaring back in mockery. For some reason, it’s so hard to come up with a way to say “Hey, do you want to work on the project right now?” without throwing his phone across the room.

Suddenly, three dots appear, as you’ve started typing out a message of your own. Jungwon nearly leaps off of his bed.

“hey, r u free to work rn?”

Grinning like an idiot, he starts typing out a reply, fingers flying at light speed over the screen of his phone.

Like Jungwon, you sit perched on your own bed, phone in your hands (which are quickly growing clammy). You reread the message you’ve just sent, searching for any spelling errors and contemplating if you’d been too informal or too forward with your wording (even though it was only 7 words). For two minutes, you wait, opting to put your phone down and look around your room, but still picking the device back up every 10 seconds to check for notifications. Eventually, you get a reply.

“yeah, fs! i’ll share a doc w/ u :)”

Satisfied, you flip open your school-issued laptop and click on the new link in your email, smiling when you’re greeted with a blank page and Jungwon’s cursor blinking on the screen. As diligently as would be expected of the student council president, Jungwon begins typing, listing out ideas for your presentation topic, and occasionally texting you to clarify specific details.

At first, your exchange is a little awkward, neither of you wanting to cross the careful boundary between project partners and friends just yet. But, as the night stretches on, you find yourself falling back into the same comfort you had years ago. It’s a little aggravating, seeing firsthand how you still click so easily with Jungwon.

At 12:45, you’re complaining about your various annoying teachers and your coursework. The project remains long forgotten; the two of you had done far more than you’d needed to anyways, seeing as the whole thing is due in 2 weeks.

Suddenly, Jungwon remembers the lined piece of paper, folded up and sitting on his desk. It’s not explicitly written in the plan, but things have been going so well tonight, and he slowly types out a new message. It sits in the little bar below the chat for a solid 30 seconds before he winces and clicks send.

“after we present and get a perfect score, we should go out and celebrate!!”

“what if we don’t get a perfect score?” you reply quickly, though you know better than to doubt the abilities of Yang Jungwon.

“we will.” he shoots back, and you smile a little at the addition of a “>:(” at the end.

At 1:09, you move on to the topic of family and learn that Jungwon has an older sister. By 1:27, you’re back to the topic of colleges, but this time, you find camaraderie in your and Jungwons’ mutual fear of the future and what lies after graduation.

And by 1:58, when you’ve started checking for notifications a little too frequently for your liking, because yes, you are still desperately trying to push any romantic attraction toward Jungwon out of your head, you power your phone off and force your eyes shut. Sleep eludes you until 2:36.

Once you stop replying, Jungwon sets his phone down beside him and flops onto his back. He closes his eyes and breathes in, then out.

A smile crosses his face as he falls asleep.

☆☆☆☆☆

OVER THE NEXT WEEK AND a half, you and Jungwon fall into a routine. During lunch, you spare no small amount of glances his way. By the time the sun sets, his messages fill your hours until you break away from your phone to go to sleep. When you wake up and go to school, he’s waiting for you, never failing to be one of the first few students to arrive in class.

Your resolve crumbles a little more with each passing day.

And now, you’ve allowed him to infiltrate your afternoons. Sunday, three days before your project is due, the two of you meet up to practice presenting. Jungwon had offered up his house, seeing as he’d have the place to himself for the afternoon and early evening, and instantly, sirens went off in your brain. Eventually, you resigned—you know firsthand just how persistent Jungwon could be. And, as if that weren’t enough, he’d bribed you with pictures of his dog.

You and Jungwon sit on the wooden floor of the small study tucked into the corner of his house, slideshow pulled up on the laptop that rests in the space between the two of you.

The door is left ajar, allowing Maeumi—Jungwon’s dog that somehow has the exact same energy as he does—to walk in and out on occasion. Maeumi, who is the only reason you’d agreed to come, rather than insisting on working in the library or a cafe or even over video call.

Being inside Jungwon’s house is so nerve-wracking. It’s not the classroom, or the hallways, or the cafeteria, the places you’ve grown so accustomed to seeing him in. There’s no screen separating you from him, allowing you to hide behind carefully thought-out messages or a well-timed sleep schedule.

There’s just you (sitting cross-legged on the floor and trying so hard to take up as little space as possible that your legs are starting to hurt) and Jungwon, whose catlike eyes seem to peer into your soul.

“Okay, let’s run through the whole thing and time it to see if we need to cut anything out,” Jungwon begins after clearing his throat.

“Sounds good,” you mumble, reaching for the mouse plugged into your laptop to scroll to the top of your shared script.

Jungwon has the same idea.

You feel his hand bump into yours as you rest it over the mouse, and you swear you’re getting heart palpitations even though you’re near 18 years old and absolutely should not be getting so hung up over something as simple as touching fingertips. Quickly, both your and Jungwon’s hands shoot back into your laps, and you take great interest in examining the frames lining the walls of the office. Your ears and cheeks burn in embarrassment.

Hesitantly, Jungwon moves his hand back and scrolls up, and you open a stopwatch on your phone. With a nod, you signal your partner to begin speaking and click play.

“Hello everyone, I’m Jungwon, and this is my partner,” he trails off, leaving the end of the sentence for you to complete, as you’d planned. Instead, you stare at the screen of your laptop, chewing your lower lip.

As the silence registers in your mind, your eyes widen.

“Sorry, I, uh, got distracted rereading the script.

“All good, let’s try again?”

With a nod, you restart the stopwatch. The two of you make it exactly four more lines before your rehearsal is once again brought to a halt. This time, Jungwon is the one who forgets to chime in with his part, instead opting to stare at the floor.

“Jungwon,” you whisper. His ears start to match yours in color.

“Sorry.”

You think that if you can get through today without embarrassing yourself any further, the presentation on Friday will be a walk in the park.

Just as you take a deep breath in, mentally preparing yourself for a third try, Maeumi trots in. The small, white dog wags his tail and runs up to Jungwon, and the project is thrown to the back of your mind.

“Hi, Maeumi,” Jungwon coos, and you reach out a hand to stroke the dog’s fur. At this, Maeumi starts to leap around, excited about seeing the new guest in the house for a second time.

Jungwon stands up, smiling softly and saying he’ll find some treats for you to give the dog. Once he’s on his feet, Maeumi perks up, walks into the center of the room, and starts to pee on the floor.

Jungwon’s smile drops. He looks like he wants to die.

“Shit shit shit. I’m so sorry, he doesn’t usually do this,” he cries, grabbing your arms and ushering you out of the office.

Once the two of you and your laptop are safely outside, standing in the narrow hallway lit by the afternoon sun streaming through the windows, Jungwon’s shoulders slump and he releases his grasp. His lips pull into an even deeper frown and his brows draw closer together.

You look at him, then back through the doorway into the room, and your lips quiver. He looks so distressed, but you can’t help it as laughter wracks your body. Soon enough, Jungwon joins in, and the two of you remain in the hallway, chests hurting and cheeks aching from smiling too hard.

“Um, I’m gonna go clean that up,” Jungwon chuckles as your laughter dies down. “We can just work in my room.”

You nod, and he directs you up the stairs and into a small room. You sit down a little hesitantly on the bed at his suggestion, and then he bolts out of the room, presumably to find paper towels.

Jungwon’s room is somehow exactly as you’d pictured it (not that you spend your free time imagining what Jungwon’s bedroom looks like, obviously). A few pictures are scattered across the white walls, and a navy blue duvet is draped over the full-sized bed. The white desk positioned in the corner of the room is spotless, scattered with a few sheets of paper and a desktop.

A few minutes later, Jungwon finally trudges into the room and collapses down onto the bed, hand covering his face. He peeks through his fingers at you, sitting next to him, and promptly starts giggling again.

Jungwon notices you look a lot less tense, relieving the tight feeling of anxiety in his chest and making his stomach flutter (in relief, he tells himself). He supposes he has Maeumi to thank for cutting through the previously awkward atmosphere, even if it did mean he had to clean up dog pee. He pushes himself up so that he’s upright and peers over your shoulder at your laptop, which rests in your lap.

Your eyes flicker to his face, a few inches away from yours, so close that if you were to turn your heads at the same time, you’d be touching.

“Let’s just run through it first, yeah? We can time it after.”

Stiffly, you nod.

This time, the rehearsal goes without a hitch. Once you’ve said your final line, you both pause, faces breaking out into two matching grins.

Jungwon pulls you into a brief hug, arms tightening around yours. You’re stunned for a second, and then you’re reciprocating, wrapping your own arms around his waist and giving him a quick squeeze before you both pull away.

“See, I told you we’re gonna get a perfect score,” he says as he resituates himself on the bed.

“We better, isn’t it worth like 15% of our grade now?”

Despite your first impressions of Mrs. Park, the woman knew all too well that more than half the class would slack off once college applications were submitted and their grades no longer held as much importance. It adds a whole new layer of stress to the already nerve-wracking project, but you’re just glad it’s happening now, rather than in a few months, when the entire year will be focused solely on their future schools. You’re also glad you have someone like Jungwon.

You’ve decided the two of you work well together. And you’re beginning to hope that he feels the same.

☆☆☆☆☆

DESPITE ALL OF YOUR DOUBTS, Jungwon is right. Your presentation is probably the best run-through you and he have done, and at the end, you see Mrs. Park’s genuine smile for the first time this year.

As you both return to your seats so the next group can go, Jungwon shoots you a smug look, and you can hear his voice in your head saying he told you so. As you watch the pair of students standing near the whiteboard, Jungwon slips you a bright orange sticky note.

“do u still wanna celebrate later?” is scrawled across the slip of paper in looping handwriting. You shift so that you can write your own reply underneath.

“we haven’t gotten our scores yet”

Jungwon frowns at your pessimism.

“did u not see mrs. park smile??? we def got a 100”

“wtv u say”

He unsticks the note from the table once you’re finished writing and resticks it in front of himself. Then, he moves his arm so that you can’t see what he’s writing. Annoyed, you face forward and actually start paying attention to your classmates’ analysis of the poem you don’t know the title of. Jungwon taps his pen to his lips a few times, deeply contemplating his next words.

Eventually, he sticks the note directly in front of you, then swivels to the front, watching your reaction out of the corner of his eye.

“are u free friday at like 7”

You’re a little surprised as you read it; you hadn’t expected Jungwon to actually stand by his suggestion of celebrating after the project ended. You would consider him a friend now, but you didn’t think he’d actually voluntarily want to spend time with you outside of class if not for schoolwork.

“think so,” You write back, trying your hardest to sound noncommittal. The last thing you want to do is turn down the implied invitation, but your palms are sweating a little and your handwriting is a little shakier than normal at the thought.

“great, you’re coming over,” Jungwon pens with finality, effectively shutting down any protests you might give as he grabs his backpack. It’s then you realize that the period has ended, and you watch his retreating figure strut out of the classroom in slight awe.

With a few seconds delay, you also make your way out of the classroom, meeting Sunoo in the hall to walk to your second class of the day.

“Jungwon just asked me to hang out again,” you immediately tell your best friend as you start to walk side-by-side down the hallway. “At his house.” When Sunoo sees your grin, his eyes immediately narrow teasingly.

“What happened to becoming friends so you can get over him?” he drawls, and you immediately look away. “It’s fine, I’m sure he likes you back at this point.”

You almost choke.

“What are you talking about?”

“He asked you out literally five minutes ago and you’re acting like I’m crazy?” Sunoo says incredulously, crossing his arms.

Luckily, you’re only a few feet from your next class. Sunoo glares as you wave to your teacher and practically skip into the classroom. Soon enough, you get a text message from the said boy.

“u know i’m right.”

You roll your eyes and tuck your phone back into your pocket.

The next three hours are spent with you completely tuning out the various lectures and wrestling with your own thoughts. Part of you does know Sunoo’s right; knows that there has to be some deeper meaning behind the lingering glances and touches shared between you and Jungwon. The other part believes that such a thing is impossible, and that you’re delusional for even entertaining the idea.

By the time your lunch period arrives, you’ve psyched yourself out to the point where you think you’ll throw up if you see Jungwon in the hallway.

Of course, this is exactly what happens (besides the throwing up). Heeseung and Jungwon stand by a row of lockers, engaged in animated conversation. Thankfully, there are still more than a few other students walking through the halls, so you’re sure you’ll be able to pass by unnoticed. The two also seem extremely engaged in their own conversation. Jungwon looks a little flushed, while Heeseung wears the condescending grin you’ve seen far too many times on Sunoo’s face.

Briskly, you walk past, ducking your head down, but you’re still able to catch a snippet of their conversation with how loudly they’re speaking.

“See, I knew you guys would get an A,” Heeseung exclaims, clapping Jungwon on the shoulder. “My plan worked perfectly, you should listen to me more often.”

“Of course we did, Y/N’s one of the smartest people in our year,” Jungwon replies, swatting away his friend’s hand.

You nearly forget to keep walking. It feels as though your heart is sinking deep into your chest and pulling your lungs down with it, and you suddenly feel nauseous for an entirely different reason.

In your haste, you miss the second part of Jungwon and Heeseung’s conversation.

“You speak so highly of them,” Heeseung smiles, finally lowering his voice. “It’s nice.”

Jungwon’s eyes widen a little before he, too, starts to smile.

“I think very highly of them.”

“I don’t think you ever needed the plan, honestly,” Heeseung’s smile shifts from genuine back to teasing. You’re both whipped and it hasn’t even been a month.”

Jungwon hums in thought before closing his locker and briskly strutting down the hallway, leaving Heeseung standing a little dumbfounded for a moment before he follows.

During lunch, the last two people you want to see sit perfectly in your line of sight, as usual. Contrary to your normal routine, however, you refuse to look over and bear witness to Jungwon’s joyous laugh or his bright smile. Now that you know, you can’t help but feel he’s laughing at you.

If Sunoo notices your dramatic shift in attitude, he says nothing. It’s not that you don’t want to tell your best friend about what you’ve just heard, but the entire situation has filled you with humiliation so deep that you think you’ll need a few weeks to even admit to yourself that you’ve been completely played.

Eventually, the lunch period ends, and for the rest of the day, you solely think about Jungwon. The boy had occupied many of your thoughts before, but now, instead of reminiscing on his dimples or his cheerful voice, you’re stuck wondering how you’d gotten here in the span of a few hours.

The worst part is that Jungwon seemed so earnest when asking you to hang out just hours before. If you hadn’t overheard the conversation with your own two ears, you’re sure you wouldn’t have believed it.

As you lay in bed, ignoring the couple texts from Jungwon trying to start your usual idle evening conversation, you feel like an idiot.

☆☆☆☆☆

WHEN JUNGWON WAKES UP THE next morning to a distinct lack of a response to his messages from the night before, his heart sinks. He wants to believe that you just fell asleep early or were extra focused on a difficult assignment, but he can’t help the little voice in his head telling him he’d been too pushy the day before, and drove you away.

This fear is only confirmed when you sit down next to him. To your credit, you do respond to his little good-morning wave. But Jungown can see from a mile away that your smile is a little too forced, and your posture is completely closed off.

Rummaging through his backpack, he finds the pad of orange sticky notes and sticks one onto your shared desk. He uncaps his pen and writes in his looping handwriting.

“everything ok?”

When you read the note, you want to cry. You stare straight forward and give Jungwon a single, sharp nod. In your peripheral vision, you don’t see his shoulders slump as a frown is painted across his face.

Luckily, the rest of the period is taken up by more presentations, allowing you to look extremely invested in what your classmates are saying so that Jungwon doesn’t try to start any more conversation. When the bell rings, you quickly sling your bag over your shoulder and walk out. Jungwon peels the orange paper from the desk and crumples it into his pocket.

Jungwon hopes against hope that the sudden shift is temporary. He tells himself that maybe your phone has been broken for the past two days, or that your pet fish died and you’re just too deep in mourning to talk to anyone that isn’t Kim Sunoo.

But then he walks into the cafeteria and sees you and Sunoo, crowded around your phone screen and giggling at a video you’re showing him.

He envies Sunoo, your best friend since freshman year and probably since junior high. It’s becoming increasingly apparent that you and him are not meant for a friendship that lasts more than a month.

His messages still go unread. Your next shared class period on Friday morning is possibly the most awkward hour he’s spent, although he’s opted to join you in your vow of silence towards him.

It’s the final day of presentations, and after the class period ends, Mrs. Park says she’ll be releasing scores. Jungwon, who’d been insistent on your success from the beginning, doesn’t even want to check.

This time, he’s the first out of the two of you to leave the classroom. Even though you’re supposed to be angry, you’re equally concerned. You know that Jungwon cares about his grades just as much as you do.

As you’re gathering your notes, you hear heels clicking against the tile floor.

“Y/N, I just wanted to let you know that you and Jungwon gave the best presentation I’ve heard in years. You’ve both earned a perfect score, please tell him as well,” Mrs. Park tells you. At the moment, she looks strangely maternal, so different from the strict, tight-lipped woman you’d known for the past month.

“Thank you, Mrs. Park. I will.”

☆☆☆☆☆

FOR SOME REASON, YOU STILL show up to Jungwon’s house at 7 o’clock on the dot.

You ring the doorbell, still contemplating getting back in your car and driving home. Before you have the chance, the door swings open, leaving you face-to-face with Jungwon himself. He’s clad in plaid pajama pants and a t-shirt, looking at you as though flowers have started growing out of your head.

After he’s scanned you from head to toe, toe to head, and back down again, he steps aside and lets you enter.

“I didn’t have anything planned,” he mumbles. “I didn’t think you were still coming.”

“Sorry,” you say, because you can’t think of any other way to properly portray how you feel. And you do feel sorry; sorry that you realized too late, that you’re still so willing to show up at his doorstep even after learning the truth.

Jungwon ushers you into the living room and offers you a seat on the couch. Once you sit, he rushes into the kitchen, telling you he’ll be right back.

For the millionth time that week, you've left him completely and utterly confused.

As you listen to Jungwon pacing around the kitchen and flip through different movies with the remote, you begin to hear a faint tapping. When it grows louder, you peer out the window and are met with a rainstorm.

It’s already dark, and with the rain, you would feel completely uneasy attempting to drive home. You get the feeling all of your exits have been sealed.

When you finally decide on playing the first Harry Potter movie, Jungwon re-emerges from the kitchen holding two bowls of ramyeon.

“Here, I didn’t know if you wanted any so don’t feel like you have to finish it.”

“Thank you. Sorry,” you mumble again as you pull your bowl closer to you and pick up the pair of chopsticks resting on the side. The word is quickly becoming the only one in your personal dictionary.

Jungwon spends about three seconds seemingly deep in thought before reaching for the remote and pausing the movie.

“What’s wrong?” he whispers, turning to face you on the couch.

“Nothing, sorry,” you reply, chewing your lower lip and picking at the skin around your nails.

“Why do you keep saying sorry?” he continues, and you almost feel guilty with the way he looks at you.

Your mouth is completely dry. You can’t think of an answer.

Jungwon sighs. “I’m gonna go for a walk.”

Then, before you can even blink, he’s out the door. You sit in slight shock for a few moments, wondering what the hell you’re supposed to do in a situation like this.

And suddenly, all of the sounds surrounding you rush back into your ears. It’s raining, probably harder than it’s rained all year. With the realization, you’re on your feet, slipping on your shoes and racing outside.

The neighborhood is dark, only dimly lit by streetlights. The moon is hidden behind the storm clouds.

Quickly, water soaks into your hair and clothes, the short sleeves and thin sweatpants doing nothing to keep out the frigid temperature.

You nearly cry when you see Jungwon, walking alone in the middle of the empty road, his figure growing smaller and smaller.

“Jungwon!” you call out, cupping your hands around your mouth in a futile attempt to magnify your voice amidst the torrents of rain pouring from the sky.

A few meters ahead, he pauses, shoulders heaving as he catches his breath. You can see the hesitation in his movements as he contemplates whether to turn around or keep walking away. Shivers start to run through your body.

“Jungwon, please,” your voice breaks, rasping from the frigid weather and the tears pricking your eyes.

Finally, he turns around. He inhales, exhales, opens his mouth, and you finally see Yang Jungwon lose his composure.

“I don’t know what you want from me, Y/N,” he says, with such a sharp look in his eyes that you’re almost taken aback. You grit your teeth. He starts walking closer.

“You,” he huffs, “are so confusing. We talk for the first time in a year, and you can’t even look at me. And then just when I think we’re finally becoming friends again, you completely shut me out.”

Your stomach clenches as remorse and anger simultaneously course through your bloodstream. You have to reassure yourself that no, you’re not being irrational, no matter how much you want to believe that Jungwon hadn’t just been using you.

“I’ve been trying, so hard, to talk to you,” he continues, each word accented with a step in your direction. “I can’t keep chasing after you when you’re making it so obvious that you want me to stop.”

“So why don’t you?” you hiss. “It’s not my fault you see me as some sort of extra credit assignment or something, right?”

You know you’re being unreasonable, but you’ve been wound so tightly this past week that you can’t bring yourself to care.

“Is class president not good enough for you? Do you have to make everyone fall in love with you to fuel your sick ego? I don’t want to be used to keep up your GPA.”

“What are you talking about? Do you really think I’m like that, after all these years?” He spits back at you. “I thought we were friends, but you really can’t trust me enough to believe that I would spend time with you just because I like being with you?”

“So then what did I hear you talking about on Wednesday? Your plan to get an A on the presentation?”

You can pinpoint the moment realization washes over his face like a bucket of ice-cold water.

“You heard—Heeseung, he,” Jungwon begins out, face quickly overtaken by remorse. His shoulders rise, then fall. “The only reason he came up with that stupid plan was because he knew I missed talking to you. I was…”

He runs a hand through his hair, the wet strands still clinging to his forehead.

“I was desperate, okay? I didn't want to lose you before I had a chance to figure this out.”

It feels like you’ve been punched in the lungs.

Even in the noise of the storm, his words sound out clearer than anything, resonating through your head like it’s an echo chamber.

“Sorry, I don’t really know what I’m saying,” he says after the silence stretches out indefinitely. You can see the wall separating the two of you slowly being built back up, right before your eyes. “I can, um, walk you home now. And then I’ll leave you alone.” You swallow.

“I’m sorry for not trusting you, Jungwon.”

“It’s okay,” he chuckles bitterly, still refusing to look straight at you.

Another pause.

“You didn’t lose it,” you whisper. It takes everything in you to keep your gaze off of your shoes as his eyes finally meet yours. “Your chance, I mean. I didn’t even know I had a chance with you, and I still couldn’t get over you after a whole year.”

The rain, the distant sounds of traffic, all of it goes completely silent, and the world stills around you.

Jungwon’s eyes search yours for one, two, three seconds, and then he’s curling his fingers around the collar of your soaked t-shirt, crushing his lips against yours, and breathing you in as the rain beats down on your backs. The tension seeps out of your body in waves as his features draw into a sweet smile.

Everything is so much, the now-soaked fabric of your clothes clinging to your skin, the feeling of his hands running up and down your bare arms, lacing around your waist, pulling you impossibly closer until you swear you can feel his heart pounding against your own.

Your fingers hover over his cheekbones before finally threading through his hair, and he shakily exhales into the kiss. You’re only a little satisfied that he feels equally as overwhelmed as you.

Eventually, the two of you pull apart, though you maintain the close proximity.

“You could’ve just told me, you know? Then I wouldn’t have wasted so much time trying to move on,” you tease, heart still soaring.

He ducks his head into the crook of your neck, and you feel his smile press against your skin.

“I know, I already feel stupid.”

“I think that’s an oxymoron or something,” you simper. “I should tell Mrs. Park her star student thinks he’s stupid.”

“You’re really annoying, you know,” he complains, lifting his head and dramatically sliding a hand down his face before turning around to glance along the road.

“Come on,” he says, holding out a hand for you to take. “Let’s go back before we both get hypothermia.”

Something in your chest flutters, and you smile for probably the hundredth time in the span of 10 minutes. Tugging on Jungwon’s hand to pull him towards you, you press a chaste kiss to his lips before releasing your grip and starting off down the sidewalk, giggling.

Maybe you’ll have to give up on getting over Yang Jungwon for a while.

[apparentlyaswarmofbees]

MORE Small Things To Imagine With the Brothers and Undatables

.

Shout out to @hikibiiii for giving me the final push to write this ♡

.

Lucifer

Hugging him close, breathing in his scent as you press your face onto his chest, his thumbs carressing your sides softly.

Staring at each other's eyes while in a candlelight dinner date, just being in awe of each other's beauty by lights of the flickering flames.

Sitting together in his office, grabbing one of his hands and sneakily taking off his gloves. He gladly lets you hold onto his now bare hands, raising your linked fingers to his lips to leave a small kiss onto yours.

Stealing his coat and Lucifer adjusting it on your shoulders with an amused chuckle.

.

Mammon

Early morning tickle fights after you surprised him by poking his waist from behind.

Saying 'aah' at the same time as both of you share your food with each other after both of you judged each other's food choices.

Mammon immediatelly crouching down, calling out your name almost in command for you to climb onto his back so both of you can run away.

Laying on opposite ends of the couch, giggling histerically as both of you try to have a thumb fight with your feet.

.

Leviathan

Successfully making him useless at gaming as you mess with his bangs while he lays on your stomach.

Sitting with your back to him on his lap, his arms circling you snuggily as she excitedly shows you a game on his computer.

The sight of his 'way too into it' face as he tries to make an origami of his favorite anime and the accomplished smile thay won't leave his face at the final result.

Leviathan pressing a plushie onto your cheek when you're sick, saying that the plushie would kiss you all better in his place.

.

Satan

Forehead touches on lazy mornings, his arms slowly entangling around you. He lazily opens his eyes, staring into youra before dropping a peck onto your lips, making sure to snuggle back on his spot under your chin after.

The sight of his usual facade breaking to genuine surprise as he eats something with an unexpected yet pleasant taste.

Satan always unconsciously bobbing his head, tapping his fingers and his feet softly along to the rythm of a music he likes.

The immediate K.O. as you meow to him and counter as he meows right back with a flushed face.

.

Asmodeus

Squishing your cheeks and giving you a big smooch when he is overloaded with happiness.

Pressing your palms against each other, noting every single detail, from size to texture, from the lines to the warmth.

The giggles he gives out as he lets you wash his hair. His eyes closing momentarily as you push back his bangs.

Laying together in bed side to side, him attently listening to you speak, his eyes wide open and curious as he rests his chin on his arms.

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Beelzebub

Making him choke on his food by making a pun while he is eating. Choking on yours when he gives the revenge with an equaly bad, if not more, pun.

Engulfing you with his jacket as he bear hugs you on a cold day.

Taking cerberus on a walk together and letting yourself become one with his fur along with Beel as both of you hug it.

The sight of Beel mimicking your gestures, be it you tilting your head, smiling or changing which leg you're putting weight on while standing.

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Belphegor

Yawning together around each other no matter if it's a real one or a fake one just to make the other yawn allong in the middle of a sentence.

Belphie animately talking as he shows you drawing after drawing he has made throughout the centuries.

Trapping him under the blankets and watching as he gives up struggling and just lays there. He gives a chuckle if you call out to him.

Snuggled together under a closed window, watching as the rain falls.

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Solomon

If you dance out of nowhere around him, he will dance a little bit along before getting too embarrassed to keep going.

Doing that thing where you offer food but keep inching your hand away as the other tries to eat it, sneaking a kiss instead once they get close enough.

The completelly silly and ridiculous laugh he gives when you tickle him by surprise.

Helping each other put on aprons when cooking together, his fingers brushing slightly against your back.

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Simeon

Laying on his lap as he softly plays with the strands of your hair, humming an unfamiliar tune every now and then.

His automatic respose to open up his arms when you open yours, gladly accepting to give you a hug.

Making him let out a strangled noise and jump in the air when you press something cold onto his exposed skin. Simeon getting his revenge when you least expect.

Caressing his face with your thumb, him raising one hand to hold it closer, turning his face to press a kiss before snugling his face back into your palm, his smile never leaving.

.

Diavolo

Ticklish sneak pecks to your neck as he hugs you close.

Being the only one able to make the prince bow down merely for you to be able fix his hair.

Slow dancing together in silence on an epty ball room after all the guests went back home.

Teaching him how to play hand games where one alternates between clapping hands and clapping agains't the other's hands.

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Barbatos

Whispering in each other's ears, leaving out giggles and chuckles to whatever either of you just said that no one else will ever know.

The feeling of skilled and gentle fingers threading through your hair as he styles it.

Barbatos purposelly serving tea more dramatically.

Sitting together at the steps of a staircase, stargazing under the dark yet surprisingly beautiful sky of the Devildom.

.

(Quite shorter than the first one, this time finished with all braincells intact lol)

[starboundanon]

Dont mean to trauma dump but it kinda sucks how some of the bigger writers in this fandom like you and squeaks and owl ignore the smaller writers tbh. like when a friend of youra posts you go crazy reblogging and commenting but us smaller writers can’t even make you look. it just feels like theres no point even writing sometimes because all the attention goes to the big writers.. Its really shitty and ik you don’t care but if you did you could literally fix it by commenting on other fics more

Anon, I “go crazy” reblogging and commenting on Owl’s fics when she posts because she’s my friend. We talk literally every single day. I don’t know who “squeaks” is but the same goes for brassknuckled, inky-starlight and Moon. They’re my friends, and when they post, I’m going to show support for them because I care about them.

I don’t go into the dinluke tag, here on tumblr nor on ao3. I extremely rarely read fanfiction as it is and it’s even rarer that I take the time to actively seek it out. I’m not going to change that. I get to choose how I interact with this fandom, and frankly, Anon, it has nothing to do with you.

And by the way, you’re the one categorizing people as “big” and “small” content creators. Owl doesn’t think of herself as especially popular. I sure as hell don’t. YOU’RE the one who acts like we’re some elitist, self-aggrandizing cabal of writers, not the other way around. We’re just a couple of people who found we had shit in common and became friends. That’s it. We’re not any different from you.

And, for the record, every single time someone has come into my DMs and said, “herbie, I wrote this thing, could you take a look at it and tell me what you think?” I have. The ONLY exception to this are when I found out a few of those people were acting sweet and polite to me in my DMs, but calling me and my friends narcisstic, money-grubbing elitists behind my back. Other than that, I have been completely open and willing to engage with anyone who wanted to share their content with me, and if you’re angry that I haven’t personally seen your fics and come to check them out, hey, my interaction with this fandom is limited, Anon. I’m still anonymous after all these months for a fucking reason.

Nobody owes you anything. If you want more attention on your writing, work hard to get better at it. Get a beta. Take a class. Ask for advice. Put the effort in. No one is stealing readership away from you and nobody, no matter how “big” or “small” they are, owes you their time or attention. You’re going to have to grow the fuck up and learn to live with that.

[btxtreads]

Hero

CHAPTER TWENTY: SUPERSTAR

↳ Pairing: Kang Taehyun x Reader

↳ word count: 2k words

↳ rating: G

↳ genre: floof >3<

The prom itself was beautiful. Pretty lights hung from the ceiling, and girls twirled around with the guys they liked on the dance floor—the skirts of their gowns creating beautiful flurries of colors that were so pleasing to the eyes. By the side, next to the snack bar, was a wide table occupied by the stars of the night—Korea’s flower boys all dolled up and escorting a single girl, Y/N.

Youra sat on another table—all the girl’s, led by Youra’s best friend Ana, were taking hopeful glances at their table—hoping for one of the (uninterested) TXT boys to ask them to dance. However, Yeonjun and Soobin were more interested in the big pile of food they took from the snack table—and Kai was busy watching his phone intently. Beomgyu was seemingly nervous, eyes flittering back and forth all around the venue.

Y/N clutched a glass of fruit punch in her hands, taking small sips as she observed the boy. She sighed as she set the cup down on the table, turning to the boy with raised eyebrows.

“You okay, babe? Are the girls bothering you?” Y/N asked, whispering over to him—glancing at the girls all looking over at their table. “If you’re uncomfortable here, we can just go take the boys and eat out instead.”

“It’s not that. I’m good.” Beomgyu answered, smiling over at Y/N’s worried glance. “I swear, I’m okay.”

“You don’t seem like it.” Y/N mumbled, raising an eyebrow. “What’s wrong?”

“He’s late.” Kai mumbled under his breath, making Yeonjun, Soobin and Beomgyu turn to him with wide eyes.

“Who’s late?”

Kai snapped his head up in surprise, not knowing that he spoke out loud.

“Uh—my sister.” Kai squeaked out awkwardly. “My sister is late to midnight dance school.”

“Midni—There’s a midnight dance school in Seoul?”

“Yeah, it’s fun.” Soobin supplied, smiling awkwardly.

“Oh, well. It’s only ten—and you said he.” Y/N blinked over at Kai, making him shake his head frantically.

“No, I didn’t.”

“Okay,” Y/N snorted, ignoring the boys’ weird antics as she reached over to fix Beomgyu’s bowtie. “Your tie isn’t set in place.”

“I don’t know how—“

The lights of the venue immediately closed down. There were a few squeals from the girls around the venue, and the five teens can hear Youra screeching nearby.

“What’s going—“ Y/N started, eyebrows furrowed as a bright light shone towards their table. “on?”

Soobin, Beomgyu, Yeonjun and Kai all exchanged grins of relief from behind the girl. He came through. A spotlight turned on, pointing towards the stage as a tall blonde stepped towards the microphone stand.

“Oh my god, is that Kang Taehyun?”

“Taehyun is here?”

“Taetae! Oh my god, wait do I look pretty enough?”

People flocked towards the stage, silently pushing each other over to get a glimpse of the boy. Taehyun ignored all the murmurs around them, clearing his throat as he locked gazes with Y/N.

“Y/N?” He started, smiling softly. “There’s some things I forgot to tell you back in Seoul.”

He turned over the the side with a small nod, taking a shaky breath as music started to play. He smiled back over at Y/N, singing.

“Baby, I’m falling head over heels.

Looking for ways to let you know just how I feel.

I wish I was holding you by my side.

I wouldn’t change a thing cause finally it’s real.”

Y/N broke eyes contact with the blonde, turning to shoot her best friend a worried glance. Beomgyu only grinned, nodding reassuringly as he helped her up.

“Gyuu,” Y/N trailed off, but the boy only smiled wider.

“I’m trying to hold back,

you ought to know that.

You’re the one that’s on my mind.”

There was a beat of hesitation. Y/N’s fists clenched on the skirt of her gown as she turned back to her friends. Yeonjun and Soobin had wide smiles on their faces as they watched, chewing relentlessly on their food. Beomgyu and Kai has phones in their faces, taking a video of the situation.  Y/N turned back to the stage, biting her lip as Taehyun stepped down.

“I’m faling too fast, deeper in love.

I’m finding the magic in the colors of you.”

She can feel hands on her back—some of her schoolmates reaching out and pushing her forward. Y/N furrowed her eyebrows as she was forced to walk forward, anxiety creeping in on her as she saw Taehyun walk closer to her.

“You’re the right time, at the right moment.

You’re the sunlight, keeps my heart going.”

Y/N stopped in her tracks as Taehyun finally reached her. He took one of her hands in his, forehead leaning on hers.

“I know when I’m with you, I can’t keep myself from falling.

The right time at the right moment,

It’s you.”

Y/N’s eyes softened as he leaned down. He let the song trail off as he cupped her cheek and closed his eyes.

As if a wave of realization crashed down on her, Y/N clenched her jaw and stepped away. She crossed her arms and looked down at her feet, avoiding Taehyun’s desperate glance.

“So, that’s it?” She spoke, voice low. “What did you think? That you can just come here and sing me a song and everything will be okay?”

“I was hoping—“ Taehyun started, eyes flying over to his friends.

Soobin was waving his arms in a wide arc above his head, while Yeonjun was frantically shaking his head. Hueningkai was making a giant X with his arms while Beomgyu was rapidly dragging a hand against his throat—a signal to stop. Taehyun blinked as he looked down at the girl, gulping at her sharp glare.

“I-I mean no.” Taehyun said. “Of course, not.”

“Right.” Y/N snorted, disbelieving. “Taehyun, the world doesn’t work that way.”

“I know that.” Taehyun replied gently, taking her hands in his once more. “But I’m working on it—I’m trying my best. I want to fix things.”

Y/N didn’t reply.

“Y/N, I—I’m really sorry, but I’m getting better.” Taehyun explained. “I want to fix this—us.”

Y/N was still silent. She turned over to look at her friends, eyes trailing over to the entrance. There was a flash of hesitation in her eyes. Taehyun followed her gaze, seeing a small army of press and paparazzi filming the moment.

Taehyun sighed, raising her hands to his lips and pressed a small kiss on her knuckles. He then turned over to the press and pursed her lips.

“I lied.”

There was an air of palpable silence that blanketed the venue. Y/N was watching him in shock, and so were his friends.

“Taehyun,” Y/N started, making Taehyun smile over at her softly. “What are you doing?”

“It’s okay,” he mumbled back. “Let me do this.”

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows as Taehyun wrung his fingers, clearing his throat.

“I just want to say that I was wrong. I told myself that I didn’t have a choice because I was scared to admit that she’s always going to be my choice.” Taehyun said in a clear voice. “I lied about not knowing Y/N, because I do. She’s smart. She’s funny. She’s an annoying passenger, a terrible navigator, a lousy photographer. She’s Beomgyu’s best friend. She’s the girl that stole my heart.”

Y/N tried to suppress her smile—she really did. But she couldn’t help the small smile leaking through her lips.

“I’m sorry.” Taehyun said again, turning back over to her and taking her hands in his once more. “I’m really sorry for what I did—It’s a dick move, and I really shouldn’t have done it, but I did and I’m never going to forgive myself for that.”

“Tae,” Y/N said softly, but he only continued.

“And I’d really understand if you won’t forgive me—I mean it’d suck, but I understand. But I just couldn’t forgive myself if I just didn’t try to give you back. Losing you was my biggest regret—“

“Taehyun.”

“and if I don’t get you back, it’ll be the biggest mistake of my life. I really love you and—“

“Superstar.” Y/N chuckled, cupping his cheeks and stopping him from talking.

“Huh?”

Y/N smiled softly, brushing her thumb across his cheeks.

“Just don’t do that to me again.”

Taehyun blinked in shock, making the girl giggle. He broke into a wide smile, leaning down and pressing his lips against hers—hands frantically gripping her hips. They can vaguely hear cheers erupt around them, even Beomgyu screaming about how it was all his idea.

They didn’t care. All Taehyun could feel was her lips moving softly against his, her soft giggles escaping her as she wrapped her arms around his neck. They would’ve lost themselves in the feeling of finding each other again—if it wasn’t for the bright flash directed their way. Taehyun abruptly pulled away, an irritated sigh breezing past his lips as he leaned his forehead on hers.

“Well, you’re a superstar.” Y/N giggled, running her hand through his hair.

“Yeah,” Taehyun grinned in exasperation as he pressed a quick peck to her lips. “Yeah, I know.”

He pulled away from her, arms still wrapped around her waist as he shot the press a dead-panned look.

“Go away.” Taehyun spoke. “Now.”

“Got it, got it!” Hueningkai’s voice resonated throughout the venue as security arrived to pull the media out of the venue. “Someone play the music please!”

“Got it!” Yeonjun’s voice answered and a song flowed through the speakers—Hueningkai’s voice backed by loud bass music.

“Hyung, I haven’t released that yet!”

Taehyun mumbled under his breath, snorting as he leaned his forehead back on Y/N’s.

“Hey.”

“Hi.” Y/N grinned, cupping his cheek once more.

Taehyun smiled giddily, making a move to lean back down to kiss her when she heard someone clear their throat next to them. The couple turned to the side, and the girl released a soft groan as Taehyun furrowed his eyebrows.

Beomgyu stood beside them, taking a few steps to stand behind Y/N while he held a plate of pasta. In front of them was Youra, wide-eyed and shocked as her friends—the TXT fanclub Youra had—flanked behind her with equally as wide eyes.

“Why didn’t you stop her?” Y/N sighed in exasperation as she turned back to Beomgyu.

He only shrugged, pointing towards his plate.

“The spaghetti’s immaculate.” Beomgyu commented before walking off.

Y/N blinked as the boy shot them a thumbs up and padded away.

“Taehyun,” Y/N sighed. “This is my sister, Youra. Youra, this is Tae—you already know him, I guess.”

Youra only released a shocked whimper, nodding. Taehyun chuckled under his breath and kissed her forehead.

“I got this.” Taehyun whispered against her forehead. “Give me ten seconds.”

“Okay.”

Taehyun pulled away from her and pocketed his hands with his superstar grin. He tilted his head as he took a step closer to Youra.

“Hey, Youra.” he started. “Want to dance?”

Youra didn’t reply. Instead, she broke down into frantic, shocked giggles. Taehyun raised his eyebrow as she giggled. The boy waved as her friends gave him a small wave, pulling the girl away from the couple and leaving them alone.

Y/N smiled as she watched the boy nod to another fan who waved over at him, turning back towards her and wrapping his arms around her waist once more.

“Always the superstar.”

“Your superstar.” Taehyun grinned, kissing her nose. “Hey, I got something for you.”

Y/N smiled softly as Taehyun pulled out a pair of shades—ones she always sees him wear around in photos taken by the paparazzi. She giggled, remembering the rendezvous she had with him in Seoul. She took the pair in her hands and wore it on her face. Taehyun smiled.

“Well, how do I look?”

“Like a superstar.” Taehyun chuckled, grinning as Y/N reached out to pull him back down to connect their lips once more.

As the world continued to revolve around them, their world started to revolve around each other. It was their happy ending.

[odlneswrld]

⋆ ࣪. ꕤ this post will be regularly updated with the groups development for now enjoy the history of odine!

⋆ ࣪. ꕤ pre-debut

On June 23, 2012 The Fae Labels began work for their first idol group and artist under the company. To prepare they first gathered their ‘definite’ trainee’s the ones they had the most hope for, these were 12 girls. After narrowing their definite list down to 6 they had the six girls do their monthly evaluation, two girls were taken off the list. Now they had four trainees, these girls being Kim Ahyoung, Angelita Lee, Jang Eunbin, and Kwon Youra.

Later they had a few trainees they hadn’t paid much mind to do their monthly evaluation, afterwards they had decided to add a new trainee to the four girls they had in their definite list, they decided to debut these five girls.

Later plans were changed and they added another trainee finally deciding on six girls to debut. The final line-up was decided as Kim Ahyoung, Angelita Lee, Jang ‘Gabi’ Eunbin, Kwon ‘Pluto’ Youra, Heo Eunji, and Jung Sohee.

⋆ ࣪. ꕤ 2014 - 2015

The six girls made an official debut on February 5, 2014 with their mini-album “We Are Odine” and their title track “Nu ABO” the girls had a small but supportive fan base and sails did lovely as well as them charting 4th on Gaon. The group steadily grew as they promoted and they ended up surpassing 30 million views on their M/V.

With this new success the company tjought, let’s add to it, which is how we met Kwon Danbi and Katou Junko. The two new additions joined Odine for their next comeback “Electricity” with a title track of the same name, the newly seven member group broke the charts with this hit, they got their first win, charted 2 on Gaon, and had become a success!

Soon after promotions ended the group went on a sudden hiatus, it began with no posts on social media before an article announcing their official hiatus had begun. Nobody knew why, they were a huge success, sales were crazy, and the got their first win. After a long six months they returned with the announcement of Heo Eunji’s departure from the group and label. Beside this they announced that Kwon Danbi would be on hiatus due to a broken leg and she would stay on hiatus until she was healed.

Late 2015 came around and the girls came back with “Welcome Back, Odine” with a new addition Lee ‘Mila’ Sora and the departure of Kim Ahyoung. The group promoted as six member piece and got a total of six music show wins, sales did great as well.

⋆ ࣪. ꕤ 2016 - 2017

The girls came back with Danbi and another new addition Oh ‘Siyoon’ Seungmi and their release “return of the music” with their title track “Trouble You” the girls had a more mature concept, they received many positive reactions and their fan base grew a ton! The girls now had eight members, they were a well known group in the industry.

Soon they came back with another new member Laura Zhen, the group had a total of nine members, they were active on social medias and very interactive with fans, they re-recorded all their songs with this line-up and had a world tour.

Later in 2016 they released “Burning Love” with the title track “My First Love” the album did great with many sales, digital streams, and music show wins. While promoting a fancam of Danbi slipping on stage before being taken off went viral, she was announced to go on hiatus again due to breaking her leg once more. After three months on hiatus the company announced her official departure.

In 2017, the now 8 piece group released “Love Is” a single with a title track of the same name, the sound was much more sophisticated and built their current concept, the music video was an ‘artistic statement’ according to member Gabi. The group did extremely well with this single and later came out with a Japanese version.

⋆ ࣪. ꕤ 2018 - 2022

the group went on hiatus in 2018 for several members suffering with mental health issues, the group was on hiatus for the entire year before rumors of disbanded began.

The Fae Labels spoke out saying the group will be returning soon and thanking fans for their patience. In 2019, they returned with a single “On The Top” the single didn’t do nearly as well as their early singles and is considered a ‘flop’ Later in 2019 they released “Our Style” which compares to “On The Top” did extremely well, they got eight music show wins and charted well. They soon had more fansign events and had another world tour.

In December of 2019 former member Kim Ahyoung spoke out saying “Angelita Lee bullied me into leaving the group, I suffered even in trainee days” Gabi, Sohee, and Laura all made a response saying that these statements were in fact false and Angelita never did anything of the sorts, despite this Angelita left the label.

Once the virus hit, their company put the group on hiatus once more, this now being their third hiatus in their entire careers. A few months after this was announced member Mila was announced to have left the company.

In 2021 things looked up for the girls, they began solo activities, members Gabi, Sohee, and Junko all had solo debuts while member Pluto filmed for “All Of Us Are Dead” which was aired in 2022. Member Laura began a YouTube channel where she interviewed rookie idols.

Now in 2022, former member Angelita debut as a soloist under YoungSound Ent. and former member Mila now under the stage name Sora participated on GP999 and debut in Kep1er placing 10th on the show. The Fae Labels released a teaser for a comeback which many fans look forward to.

[taegularities]

the way i used to hate yjhd growing up especially that one dialogue "girls like you are meant to be/ deserve to be loved" somehow implying that girls like lara don't deserve love? like im sorry mr. bunny but all girls deserve love none of us deserve your fuckery. when i noticed you were inculcating the movie into your writing i had hoped you'd get rid of the sexist and homophobic themes but i can't blame you, the sexism and homophobia is like half the plot 🙄

we should try inculcate GOOD romance movies into writing like barfi or rab ne bana di jodi. not a huge fan of romance but ugh these two movies make me cry like baby.

the oc is so unlikeable in your recent fic. i had to stop reading halfway. "i'm not like youra" bro she's such a "i'm not like other girls" like she so "qUiRkY" and wEiRd 🤪 and so "different". she needs to stop shaming other girls to make herself feel better just cause she has the personality of boiled water. like there's a difference between being an introvert and being a loser. #justiceforyoura

hi, hope your weekend is going well. i thought long and carefully about what to do about the scenes you're referring to and decided to tweak them a little. the two or three sentences with youra were indeed not the best, you're right, i guess i followed the movie plot too blindly. but i've changed it now and i hope it's okay like that!

i'm sorry that you felt that way, i never in any way meant to be sexist or anything like that - i'd never consciously do that. however, i must say that i never wrote anything homophobic in that fic; at least i don't recall a single line that might be homophobic, it's actually something i purposely omitted cos i didn't like it in the movie.

that being said, movies like rab ne bana di jodi might not be the ideal example either - which features a wife almost cheating on her husband cos the other man is 'pretty'. and in that case, i feel like yjhd might even have better and lovelier messages, you know? it's ofc okay if you don't agree, you've the right to hold onto your opinion.

about the second ask. i do think that your choice of words is... not ideal regarding a fic i spent 5+ months on :/ i always try really hard to give my characters a personality, be it good or bad, but i want one to be there. i might be wrong ofc, but i didn't feel like... she was trying to be different or quirky. she wasn't shaming youra either, but kept to herself and felt like she didn't belong there.

so many people have felt like that in their lives. people have been jealous of others, too... i feel like saying she has the personality of boiled water and is a loser is shaming someone too? but she never went "i'm different and better, youra is (a) xy". that's just my opinion and i can be wrong of course.

but yeah, i changed some of the fic, i do apologise for my mistake, but i did want to defend some points too that were not so justified, i think. take care <3

[ohsharethekmusic]

Song : L (Instrumental)

Artist : 015B & youra

Album {Single} : L

[aala-13jellychocolate]

Odious Love Part 8 (M)

This gif is not mine…….

Author: I’m still very new to writing so I hope you all will forgive my mistake and grammar too. I’m so sorry for the late update, I had killer shoulder pain, the doctor asks me to rest of the whole month. I hope you enjoyed the new chapter. It is longer than before. And I’ll tire to updated more regularly.  

It is a long chapter and has a bit of Smutty stuff.

Pairing: Junmyeon x Reader  

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut, CEO! AU

Prologue, Part 1(M),  Part 2,  Part 3 (M),  Part 4 (M),  Part 5 (M),  Part 6, Part 7 (M)

Summary:  

Suho and you were sleeping together for the last 3 year. You were in love with him but he was not. He just wanted to depend upon someone emotionally. You were okay with it, you wanted to be with him in whichever way you can. You were not his girlfriend but he never treats you less. One day he got married to other women because of business. You thought everything was over between you two but he came back to you. He spends his wedding night with you leaving his wife all alone. 

Part 8

You were living in a dream, which you never dream off. Your heart was unsteady because Suho never let go of your hand till your honeymoon suite room. It is not the first time he held your hand, still why it feels different today? You’re asking yourself. The answer was simple. Today he did something you never thought he would ever do. Today you were above his work, his everyone. Today for the first time you got feeling he won’t leave you.  

The suite looks cozy, still elegant. While Suho saying something to the bellboy in whatever Thai he knows, you go to the balcony watch the sunset. You hear the door getting open and closed. Suho silently comes to you, wrap hands around your stomach, your back pressed on his chest. He perfectly cages your body with his. For a while, you both stay like that, pleasantly. He gives a light kisses around your shoulder and neck, not in a sexual way. “Why you didn’t tell me about this plan?” you asked. You can feel his smile near your earloop while he replies, “I needed your time without anyone interruption. And there is no meaning if asking you. Your answer is would have been no.” It was true. It has been too long, you both have got some time to together alone, but you would have never come here. Even though you love to spend time with him, alone, you cannot forget Youra is his wife, at least for the world. You were afraid of people finding out about you and Suho, not scared of what they will say, but it will make him leave you, immediately. Only if he would have loved you back, you were ready to fight the whole world.

Again, there was comfortable silence. Sun was ready to vanish from the sky. It has created a beautiful and colorful view. He breaks the silence, “I’m sorry for everything. I have tried to stop this marriage. Princess, you know my father. He mess……” You stop him in between, “Don’t make me hate you by saying it?” You turn around, look in his eyes, sunset light making his skin beautifully glow, “I mean your sorry. I know I used to complain about it, but when you said it, it hurt’s. It is the worst thing I ever heard from you. Suho, we cannot change what has already happened, and I know you have done your best to stop everything, that is enough for me.” You give him a small smile, “I don’t know what will be our future, I only know, I want to stay with you. And I don’t want to hear your sorry anymore.” It was true, you have stopped caring about the thing a long time ago. You want to stay by him, forever if it is possible.  

He smiles widely. You were expecting a long and passionate kiss, but you got a sweet forehead kiss. Your expression said all, and he loudly laughs on it. Doorbell ring, he orders you to stay where you are. He comes back with cake, happy birthday written on it. He happily announces, “We are celebrating your belated birthday.” You cut the cake while he sings birthday song like we used to do as kids. You roll your eyes, “You didn’t even wish me on my birthday, and now you’re making a fuss.” He pouts, “How I am supposed to when I was full of guilt. That day mom forces me on a date with Youra.” You smile, pull him in a hug, ensuring it is okay. He breathes in your ear, “I still have your birthday gift.” You look at him with one raised eyebrow. You wish he hasn’t purchased an expensive gift. You avoid taking the expensive item from him, as for today, his expression says he will make you accept it by any means. You nod, it did excite to see what it is. If it is a valuable thing, you won’t take it, but nothing is wrong seeing it.  

He continues, “It is expensive, and you are taking it, no argument.” Before you can say anything, he removes the blue velvet box from his jacket pocket. He opens the box, show you a blue color diamond in the shape of a water drop pendant with a platinum chain. It was beautiful, “Princess, please don’t argue. Just take it, I have especially made for you. I cannot make you wear the ring of my name, and show the world that you are mine. Please don’t think about stupid expenses, see my sentiment behind it. And just like you, I’m scared that someday you may leave me. However, this neckpiece will reassure me that you are not going away.” He said quickly, emotionally blackmailing you.  

It doesn’t feel right to accept high-priced jewelry, but you cannot bring yourself to argue, “Okay, I’ll take it, but only if you promise that any point of time, if we ever get separated, you have to take it back.” Giving you warning look, he sighs then nods, “Okay, whatever, promise. But just for your information, I will never let you go, and if you try to leave me, I’ll tie you to my bed, permanently. Now wear it.” You roll your eyes then laugh. He helps you with putting it, took a step back and took a proper look on you, and smile, “It looks perfect on you.”  

Then you both had a perfect dinner and got the best cuddle sleep after tired from a long journey. In the morning, Suho said there is a change of place. You wined as you liked suite, but he ignores it. You take a nap in the car while reaching your new destination.  

When Suho wakes you up, you astonished. “Are we stay alone here?” you asked. You were in the lawn of the two-storey villa in the center of place look like a small forest. Indeed, it was beautiful, still will be scary to stay isolated. He smirks, “No one goes on honeymoon with family or servant. So yes. Just you and me.” You wanted to say something but becomes a loss of word. “Princess, Why are you afraid? The town is just 30-minutes away from here. And keeper will come to check in every two hours.” You nod and reassure yourself; you are with Suho. He gives you a tour of the villa. In the down floor, a large main room, playroom with have most of the indoor games, back of the villa, outdoor pool and kitchen. In the first floor, a small rooftop garden, large bedroom, and a bathroom. From the balcony view of endless sea, little far there was a small beach as the villa was in little peck. Every single thing was so stunning. You get to know Suho’s new talent, arranging holidays. Coming back to the main room, he grabs your waist, thugging you closer seductively said in your ear, “So from which room we shall start exploring? We merely have today, from tomorrow I have planned outdoor activities too.” From a moment you couldn’t understand it. What he wants to explore then he looks in your eyes with lust, you got it. He desires to explore each other bodies, although nothing has left to discover.  

Honeymoon is like a honeymoon. As Suho said, in the day there was a lot of outdoor activities. You feel like you have seen half of Thailand. After dinner, there is lots of sex until you both get too tired and fall asleep. Your heart skips a beat every time someone calls you Mrs. Kim. Within five days, you have collected so much of warming memory.

You had many dates, vacation with him, neither of them has given this kind of feeling. In the start of your relationship, it has been about sex, and you fall in love with him. Slowly you become his friend more of his emotional support. More time spend, more you get to know each other, it becomes like a relationship; Still not even for once thought about the real relationship, marriage or any other things like that crossed in your mind. You only thought to spend your whole life beside him, if you get lucky enough. However, you feel something change after his marriage. He is treating you with unsaid emotion. He married someone else yet he is becoming yours more. Like maybe this unnamed relationship will get some name.  

Going back home was a pain. Youra was waiting at the airport. She gives you a look full of loathing, but she didn’t look sad or miserable after a way Suho has treated her, she didn’t even complain to Suho mother about it. Maybe because she doesn’t want to feel embarrassment, you thought. Suho keep you along with him so Youra cannot approach you and also ask you to avoid her.  

And for the last 15 days, you were doing it. It was a little hard to get used with different Suho. You like it, but you also miss old him. At work, everyone was busy, working hard to achieve a government project, it would help to improve company image more. And hard work pays off, and the company gets the project. Mr. Kim calls you in the mansion, and give the responsibility of arranging a success party. While Suho was busy talking with his father, you collect all document and get ready to go home. Youra comes and sits next to you. “So how is it going with you and Junmyeon? I forgot to ask. How was the honeymoon? Did he enjoy himself with you?” she asks with an arrogance. You look around in fear if anyone has heard it or not. Before you can say something, she continues, “As a good wife, I hope he has fun and stays happy. Please do satisfy him, give him a good fuck until he gets bored with you. Out of a little curiosity. What Junmyeon gives you after sex? I check your background. You don’t have much money, so then what?” In deadpan, you replied, “Youra, this is not a place to talk, and I get what are you referring too. Let me make it clear nor Suho is using me for sex, nor I want anything from him…..” She cut you, “Do you think he loves you back as you do?” She hit in the right place in your heart. “Y/N sweetheart, you are a simple fuck. He doesn’t love you. Don’t have high hopes. Sooner or later, he will leave you.” You cannot let her win this, you brightly smile, “Say whatever you want, at least he has given me right to call him Suho unlike you. And if I’m not wrong, right now, I’m the only one who can call him Suho for others he is Junmyeon.” She becomes red with anger. You ignore her, take leave from Mr. Kim and go to the penthouse.  

Suho penthouse has become your new home after the honeymoon, you were staying here, next to Suho. You don’t even remember your small apartment until today. Suho will come after dinner with his father, so you also finish your food, take a shower, and go to bed. You start to think about what Youra said. Suho never promised you anything not before nor now. Just because he doesn’t want you to leave now, doesn’t mean he wants you permanently. You played every memory from the day you met him until today in your mind. She was right. Indeed you got your hope higher than necessary. You are not a simple fuck or anything like that. You were his friend, his partner, his emotional support. He will always be with you, maybe needs you too.  

After start you get involved with him, for all forward months, you thought you were okay for breaking your tie with him (slowly) when he falls in love. You always through, when he will get his girl, as she and he gets closer, he will keep nagging you about it. Slowly, slowly your sex engagement will stop, gradually you both will able to let go of each other. But Youra came so suddenly. Before you could understand, he got engaged, then married. You didn’t get time to let him go, and it made you emotionally unstable. When he comes back to you, you couldn’t think of anything besides holding him. And he changes a bit, you foolish start thinking, he has a feeling toward you. Now it is making you worried, if he finds someone, how will you take it. The selfish part of your wish, he never finds someone else, and always stay with you. You hate that part, it is not right toward him.

You realize you were crying and your pillow already wet from tears. You also realize Suho is back and silently watching you, near the bed with fold hands over his chest. You grasp as he said with rage, “What the fuck that bitch said?” You open your mouth to lie, he continues, “Don’t dare to lie. I saw her talking with you. She has said something which made you cry like this.” You sit up silent, not knowing how to tell him you were hoping for him to love you back. He glances you, waiting for an answer. When you didn’t answer, he tightened his jaw, “Fine, I’ll go and ask that witch only.” No, he cannot, she is staying in the mansion, Suho parents are there too. You quickly said, “She didn’t say anything.” He sniffs, “Oh really, you were okay and happy till we go to the mansion, then suddenly you crying. And before you say ‘I’m missing my parents.’ Please spare me with your lies. If you would have missed them that much, you will order me to allow leave.” He started to walk toward the door. You to stop him, without hesitation and with sobbing voice, you said, “She didn’t say anything, I just realized, somewhere I still want you to love me back as I do. I’m worried about my desires.” He stops at the door, silently. He always feels guilty for not loving you back. You always try to avoid this sort of conversation. You look down, “Suho, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you guilty…..” You didn’t accept him to be angry. He roughly pushes you, making your back hit the bed and coming above you, his lips find yours. He brutally sucks your lips, not even given you much of chance to kiss him back. You can feel his angry but much more worried. His body tightly pressed on yours. Unexpectedly he stops. He was mad, grabbing your jaws tightly, he said, “So Youra said, I’ll leave because I don’t love you and you believe her. How many fucking times I have told you, I’ll never leave you. Even forgetting about fucking marriage, I’m with you, but you choose to believe her, not me, but her.” He stood up, “You know what leave now, and don’t come back if you think I will ever leave you.”

You sob, “Suho…”

He grabs his hair, “Don’t. Fucking don’t. I know what are you going to say. 'Youra didn’t say anything, I was thinking about it.’ And you want me to believe it. Y/N, It has been around two years, last time we talk about it. Until she said it, it was okay. Even when you come to know my marriage, you directly ask me to get rid of her. And suddenly, you are crying. It is her. I know it is that bitch. That is why I wanted you to stay away from her.” He was breathing heavy with wrath, and you were sobbing. You go to him, tightly wrap your hands around him. He immediately hugs you back. You get to relax by hearing his heartbeats. He gets relaxed too. You look up, lean to kiss him. His lips find yours, this time session going sweetly, gently. Silently, without breaking the kiss, your hands start unbuttoning his shirt. He breaks the kiss, stops you, “Not now princess, I will hurt you, I won’t be able to go easy, you will have all purple, pink and red marks everywhere.”  

“Maybe, because you have changed and only behave sweetly with me, make me think you will leave me.”  

He smirks, “If you were missing your daddy or owner, you should have directly said to me. And I was behaving sweetly because that is how husband behavior with his wife.” You narrow your eyes. Husband and wife, it is a new thing like the stupid role plays. He gives you devil smile, “Did you dare to look me like this. I’m still angry on you baby girl. And I thought of perfect punishment for you. Get ready you won’t get good sleep nor will be able to walk tomorrow.” You roll your eyes, but smile thinking about it. It has been long when you had a hard fuck.

Before anything could start; your phone starts ringing like hell. It made Suho irritated, “Who the hell is calling you this late at night, PRINCESS?” You give him an awkward smile, take your phone in hand. He snatches it, put on speaker. As soon as male voice come, he dangerously smirks. You cannot believe, a few minutes ago he saw you crying over him, and now he is giving you look 'How dare you to speak with any male.’ like old times. Well, last time, a random person call you late and ask on a date. And Suho almost killed you with his games.  

'Miss Y/N, I’m guard at office gates. Someone broke inside the office. Please don’t tell Kim sir. I’ve taken 2 minutes of a smoke break, and someone comes in. I don’t want to get in trouble, so I called you.’ For a moment, you breathe in relief.

Unfortunately, Suho already heard the poor guard, and his look is saying, that guy will lose his job. Before Suho say anything, you said, “Can you identify the person?” “Yes. His name is Huang Zitao. He seems bruise. I call for a doctor, but he refuses. And the problem is he keeps asking for Junmyeon sir. If sir coming know someone was able to break-in, I’ll lose my job.” Huang Zitao, Suho and you were confused. You told the guard to make him wait until you reach there.  

Suho was confused and worried it has a long year last time any of his friends have properly talked. We reach the office. The guard was shocked to see Suho with you. Suho was not angry with him, as he knows Tao well. Tao is good at breaking into any place. You assure guard nothing will happen to his job as the lead where is Tao waiting. As soon as Tao sees Suho, he hugs him and starts cry. Saying like an orthodox person, Tao cry like girls, you have never seen a guy crying like this. Suho ask what happen, he sobbing and mixing Chinese said something which you cannot understand at all but looked as Suho understood everything. Suho always said their bond was so strong now you can see that. After Suho consoling, Tao suddenly stops crying, and whines he wants to stay with Suho, forcefully inviting himself to the penthouse. He was a child in a giant physique. You give an unimpressed look to Suho. When three of you reach the car, Tao look at you, “Why are you coming with us? You should go back home. Hyung and I won’t need you at night.” Before you said anything, Suho said to him, “No, she is coming with us.”  

Tao again says to you, “Your hoodie look too large for you. You don’t have any fashion knowledge.”    

Again Suho answer, “It is my hoodie. She was working late with me, so she cannot go home, so I lent her my hoodie to sleep comfortably. Now stop question and get in the car.” Thank God Tao stop questioning, nope your mistake. Suho open driving seat door, Tao said, “Hyung why are you driving? She is your assistant, so she will.”  

You were about to take a step toward driving seat, Suho huff, “NO. Y/N, dare you. Go and sit in the backseat. And Tao if you want to come with me, be quiet.” After an uncomfortable car ride, you reach back to the penthouse.  

Suho asks Tao to go the guest room, again he whines about a ghost being there he cannot sleep alone at night. Suho was about to take Tao to his bedroom. You stop him. For a moment he felt confused then remember your all personal item is lying here and there. And of course, Tao sees you both. After a small question and answer, Tao decides to sleep in the guest room with Suho and you in Suho room. You take a step. Tao stops you, “Wait, I’m getting hungry. As I know Hyung cannot cook, so can you cook for me.” You made a mistake by sarcastically asking, “Why not. Would you like french fries with eggs.” His brightly smile and nod.  

You go to the kitchen, start cooking. By now, you were entirely irritated. Tao is keeping eyes on your every moment. Even if Suho smile toward you, he looks questioningly. Suho joins you in kitchen, “Nice combination. Oversize hoodie, sweatpants with the heel. After my punishment sex, next time you would be dress like today.” You roll eyes, “It is your fault, you don’t let me keep my clothes or other footwear here, and we will have sex if that whining child leave.” He cups your face, “You look perfect in only my shirt and bare feet in my house. Tao will go tomorrow. For now, please bear him with us.” You smile, he leans for kiss and Tao call him, you have felt if Tao stays he will not leave Suho alone even for a minute.  

Suho saying come true the next morning. You cannot sleep because Tao keep asking something or something and you cannot walk because you were on heel hold night, Tao didn’t even give you a minute to rest or remove your heels. You were surprised to see Tao at the office following Suho everywhere. Somehow you complete your days with tiredness, thinking you can sleep in Suho arms tonight, and it never came.  

It has been five days Tao was still with Suho. He follows Suho everywhere. In the meeting room to the washroom, it doesn’t feel right. Suho be a supportive friend by saying, Tao is in emotional trouble and needs his time in aid. When Mr. Kim come to the office, he asks about Tao. You tell him what happen and close sentence with irritating tone 'He follows Junmyeon like puppy follows his owner.’ Mr. Kim looks with wide eyes as you use unprofessional language then laugh. Unexpecting thing again happens, when Suho scolds Tao for following him during work, Tao starts following you when Suho gets busy. And Tao makes you tired with nonstop talking and never-ending demands. Physically you have never been this tired not even after having hard sex. In other hands, you get busy with party arrangements but miss Suho like hell. He is always in front of you, and you cannot even have one kiss. Technically, you didn’t have a proper look at his face. Beside work hardly there is any talk.  

You enter his office to get a few cheques to sign from him. When you couldn’t find Tao, you lock the door behind. He laughs and invites you in his laps. Happily, you sit, kiss him showing how much you missed him. He kisses you back with equal passion. Your hands start moving fast. His tie was loosing, three shirts unbuttoned and start kissing expose skin. He rests his hands on your waist, said, “Princess, Tao will be back soon. If you still want to continue, then I’m also okay.” You groan then stop, “Sorry, I know you love him, he is your soul brother and everything, but when he is going back?” He laughs, “You know, you are behaving like a wife who wants her husband attention and hates all of his friends.” He is torturing your heart by husband and wife talks. You give him a sharp look. He again laughs, “After the party, he is going, I have to make sure of it. He will go.” You breathe in relief, “I’m missing you like hell.”, “Me too, Princess. Just wait till for more two days.” You smile. You were missing your parents to, you ask for leave which agreed to give you after a week.

Your time was going slow without Suho. Finally, then party day arrives. Although there was no theme for the party, CEO floor decides to have one and wear only blue. You hope everyone like the arrangement, and Mrs. Kim praised and confirm it is good. Her good mean excellent. When Suho father was CEO, she used to do parties organization. There are many stories about how wonderful she used to be.  

Suho was also wearing a blue velvet suit. Everyone thought you said to him to wear blue. (Which you don’t.) Suho confirm it by telling them. Everything was going smooth until Suho suddenly looks aggressively toward you from far. He look you like this when you let anyone man closer to you. (Only to piss him.) But tonight have been behaving. You excuse yourself, go to the empty washroom to talk with him.  

As soon as Suho entry the washroom, he grabs your shoulder tightly, roughly pushes to near wall, “I LEFT YOU ALONE FOR FEW DAYS, AND YOU ALREADY FOUND SOMEONE ELSE?! Y/N what the the hell?” You were bewildered. You want to get angry for doubting. Who is he talking about exactly? “Now, don’t look confused.” Neglecting shoulder strain, you cup his face and politely ask, “Suho, what are you talking about?” not wanting to get angry and make things worst. He let you go, huff, “Oh! Really? What is this?” He shows you the pictures on his phone, of you and Namjoon. Today morning you met him while picking in up Mr. Kim jewelry. (She doesn’t trust anyone beside you in case of money.) Namjoon wanted you to gift a gold ring to his mother. You guys hug, and you drag him to the same store from which you have to pick up jewelry. As there are always new designs and you can trust the quality. While selecting, he tires ring in your fingers. Suho phone had all the picture, where you hug, as placed ring on the ring finger and by your surprise Namjoon give you goodbye and Thank you kiss on your cheek. You know this hard to explain, it was just a friendly gesture which Suho never like, worst is his possessive nature, he never takes a kiss or hugs lightly, and your silence is not helping.

He angrily runs hand on his hair then grab your arms tightly, “Who the fuck is he?” You said Namjoon; he immediately recognizes, “That army guy, whose party you want back then.” You nod, still don’t know how to explain. “Fuck. He is your parent plan. They always ask you to get married. Now they have started finding a man for you. And you. You also want to get married, that is why you were trying rings from his hand.” Angry made his eyes, red and teary. Finally, you get your voice, “Suho listens to me, please. Namjoon came to buy a gift for his mother. I accidentally meet him, as my town person, I was helping him. Nothing else. Yes, I was trying rings so he can select, the hug was friendly, some as I hug Mark and the kiss, I was also surprised by it; There is nothing nor my parent is planning anything, I promise you.” He loses a grip a bit and gets a little bit relaxed. You speak again, “Suho. He is just a friend. I’m sorry.” He let your arms go, cup your face and said, “Sorry doesn’t mean anything, Princess. You think it friendly behaviour? If I go this close to Youra, you will know how I’m feeling. When Tao shows me pictures and others, telling his is your boyfriend, I just wanted to fuck the hell shit out of you in every way I know or to kill you. Anyways, Tao is going, but I don’t want to see you at my place.” With this, he left. It is going to be hard to explain to him. He is very mad. You look the bruises already form , thank god you dress will not let it expose, going back to the party hall and start to think of some way to pursue him.

Somehow you and Youra along with Mr. Kim is the same group of people. Were talking about business growth and business acquisition. Youra endup saying to Mr. Oh(CEO of Law firm), to buy hotel chains, so it will save meeting cost with his client. Mr. Kim chokes his drink, and others try hard not to laugh. It was stupid for the daughter of a businessman to not know the basic things of business. Mr. Kim in a low voice, he asks you to be with her or make Suho be with her, not wanting further damage to their image. You cannot be near her, so you went to Suho. As he sees you coming toward him, he changes his the direction. After a while, he listens to you. Laughing at Youra stupidity, to your surprise, he agrees without an argument. The way he smirks at you, he is ready to make to super jealous. His a little playful side come out.  

You see the torment. It would be better if you have stayed around Youra. For two hug with Namjoon, Suho hand wrap around Youra waist for more than half an hour. For a small kiss, he countless kisses her hair and forehead. She was too close. And of course, she was enjoying the attention, she even smirks toward you. Well, she was stupid, Suho is doing all this to make you insecure. You hardly control yourself when someone commented on how lovely couple they are. For the first, it was hard for you to maintain professional behavior. Even your workmates ask you question as you look red with angry. After the torture of the whole one hour party got over. After irritating you for long, Sohu message you to come home along with him, it makes you brightly smile. 

You waited while he send-off guest and his parent. Out of nowhere, the car speedily cames toward Youra. Suho saves her before car crushes her. Kim security personnel run after the car. No one can understand what happened, maybe the driver was drunk to drive the fast near the hotel entryway. You call the cops. Youra got frightened, tightly hug Suho, not ready to leave him. Right now, you don’t care about it. You are glad she is safe. Cops arrive soon, take the details, promise to find that culprit. Youra was still shivering uncontrollably in Suho arms. Suho said he is going to Mansion along with Youra. You didn’t like it for a moment, then try to control your jealous, and decide to understand Youra feelings. You went to the penthouse. Thinking about Suho and Youra closeness made you cry. It was foolish, but that is how people fall in love, by accident. They start caring for each other. Without changing clothes or removing makeup, you sleep in a bed and keep crying while thinking for him soon fall in sleep.  

——-//——  

Suho was in the car with Youra. He got irritated with her whining about the incident. He was with Youra for sympathy and his image. He knows you have gone to penthouse and he wants to be there with you because of Tao, he could even talk with you properly for the whole week. Now all he can think about is you. Thinking about Tao, something was odd about him. Like he was collecting information by staying close. Suho is willing to wait for Tao to come and say why he does it. He trusts his friends. They will never hurt him in any way. As soon as car stop at Mansion gate, Suho asks Youra to get out. Youra starts throwing the question, in annoyance Suho said, “Whatever I did, did it because I wanted Y/N to get jealous and irritated. And saving you, I would have done it for anyone. Now get fuck out the car, I have to go, my girl is waiting.” Youra argues, “You didn’t see the picture. Y/n is cheating. She wants your money or……….” “SHUT THE FUCK UP. SHE IS NOT A CHEATER. I KNOW HER. Yes, she makes me jealous, but cheating is not her.” “But you were angry with her.” “Only because she let him come close to her. Just get down. Don’t waste your time and energy on me or make me regret saving you.” Youra huff and get down. She though Suho starts getting found of her, but no. She knows she has to do something consequential to make him dislike you. In the penthouse, Suho breathes in ease seeing you in his bed. He desired one of two things, sleeps while holding you, or to have sex with you for every night of his life. For him, you are the only person who loves without asking anything in return. Even after getting hurt by him, you still stay with him. The only one who is trying and understand him. He cannot let you go ever. He still remembers the day when he is the first time he saw, the first time you submitted to him, the first you cried while say 'I love you.’ even after having an only sexual relationship, you were still able to see through him. 'I love you.’ it was a luxury to hear it. Whenever you say it, Suho craves to announce that the world, he has someone who is just his without any condition, he doesn’t know why, but it boosts his ego. It wouldn’t be wrong to say you have reached his heart. Nevertheless, he is worried, someday someone will take you away. He wants to find a way which describes you will never able to leave him. It was selfish, but he cannot lose you. Well, there was a way if he would have married you, it would’ve done, you cannot leave him. However, it didn’t cross his mind until he got married to Youra. He curses himself forever for it. Another stupid idea runs in his mind. He wants to transfer some properties in your name, so you’ll won’t be able to leave him because you are not into money, you will feel a burden. He pushes all stupid plan away. He was about to wake you up, to eat and change. Today he has irritated you a lot which makes you forget to have dinner. He has tried hard not to be angry, but the picture of Namjoon being this close to you, make his blood boil and assume you will leave him. And if you want to go, he will never stop you. He has a heart which desires to have you, but not more than your happiness. He didn’t tell you, he is trying to seek divorce with Youra. After that, if you allow, he will announce to the world, he belongs to you. He smiles which stroking your hair, and seeing you sleep. He keeps admiring his beautiful girl for a while then finally sweetly wakes you up. In sleep, you whine. His hand reaches on the under pillow realizes you were crying today also. “Princess, wake up now, I want to talk.”, he commands while shaking you a bit. You open your eyes, in sleepy voice said, “What are you doing here? How is Youra?” He finds your voice so sexy. However, he curses inside. Who cares about Youra? When his princess was crying. You sit up. “Fuck her and tell me, why were you crying? Why haven’t you change? You didn’t eat, did you?” You yawn while saying, “I was tired, just want to sleep.” You try to sleep he pulls by hip, making you sit, steadily, “You are not sleeping before you eat and don’t ignore my question. Why didn’t you cry? Since when did you become crybaby.” Your eyes widely open, “I’m not a crybaby. And it is your fault. You were too much at the party then going to stay the whole night with her. I got jealous.” He knows you better than you think, “Princess, I’m here with you and let me guess, you thought like movies my love story will start with her, just because I go with her?” He starts laughing, “You are truly insane. Sometimes, I cannot understand you at all. You get worried about her then get jealous over her.” You look down in embarrassment, “ And Princess, how many time I’ve told you, I dislike her from the core of my heart.” Pulling you over his lap, in a serious tone while looking in your eyes, he continues, “And if I want to start any love story, I’ll start with you. My Princess.” You try to kiss hear it, but turn his face, “No kiss or anything else, until you eat.” You get down from his lap, in upset voice said, “Fine let’s eat. And I won’t let you touch me. You have teased me a lot. Now time to punishment.” He snorts, “Really, Why? I should be the one who gives you this kind of punishment. I was not the one who let Namjoon hug and kiss me. Wait. You know what, let’s have a bet, whoever loses control and kiss first will lose. And the winner can ask for anything in return.” You rest hands on her hips, in sensual voice said, “You know I never lose, game on love. I’ll make you beg.” One more sentence in this voice, Suho would have lost it before even starting. From outside, it seems like you’ve submitted yourself to him. The reality is he has submitted with all of his heart, mind, and soul to you. He firm himself, he has to win. Suho comes near you, without touching you, he leans forward, in a low voice said in your ear, “You’ve to lose it. Just form information, I haven’t forgotten about punishment sex then your odd attire sex, trust me when we start you are going to see  another world.” He saw you getting a little aroused by it. He chuckles after intimating you, and back off, “First eat.” You roll your eyes. He can see, you were determined to win this game. He was all so ready for this game. After food, you start teasing him. Get naked in front of him before going for a shower, keep the bathroom door open. Suho eyes linger body. Every moment makes his grasp; his breath gets heavy by every passing minute. He curses when you fake moan while taking a shower before he loses he runs out of the room. He was feeling so hot. He goes to the guest, take a cold shower then right away start working on the laptop. He cannot see you. He knows you were going to tease the hell out of him. He didn’t want to lose or get a boner. Even after all this year, you affect him. He waited until you sleep. He peeks inside the room saw you sleeping. He curses again, seeing you sleeping only lacy nightwear with cover. You were teasing him even when you are sleeping. Same time, he recalls hiding all nightwear then how did you find it. Now, he has to find a new place to hide. Not wasting any time, he changes the hiding place. Coming back, he wrapped himself around you, like always, in your sleep you adjust, and start breathing from his neck. He loves it. It was Sunday, both of you had a good sleep by waking up at 10:00 a.m. Usually, you both get up by 7 a.m., so it was pretty late. If the night was your day was Suho’s. Suho comes out of the shower in front of you, only in the jogger. He didn’t dry out his hair, so waterdrop keeps dripping on his shirtless body. You dry gulps while seeing him. To tease him, you only wear his white shirt. Last night, he worked hard to gain control over his desire. Somewhat, he knows you will do this, and he was ready for it. Whenever you wiggle your body, he comes near you, cages you between his hands or breath from you then back off. It was hard for him to control, but he was not willing to lose today. Suho goes inside the kitchen for coffee. You also follow him. Giving him back hug as you roam your hands on his bare front body while he makes coffee, you say, “Suho, how long we are going to play this game.” He smiles. Yes, you going lost it soon. He can feel you are getting seduced by his ignorance. He bites his lip and says, “It must be more than a week, last time, I’ve touched you. It is hard to control, but you have to lose. I want something from you so I cannot lose it.” You breathe out, “Fine, I lost. I will do whatever you ask. Now can we do something.” Suho’s eyes sparkles. He off the coffee machine, pull you in front of him, “Princess, are you sure? Whatever I ask, you need to do it, without any argument.” You nod. Suho smile, “Then lose it by kissing me first.” Without wasting time, you pull him by the neck and kiss him. Passionately, your soft lips move hungrily on his. He didn’t hold back. As lips moves, he pulls you by your waist, slamming his hips on your, he shows his erection. Between kiss, you moan on his action. It turns him on more. He breaks the kiss while catching breathe said, “How about having sex here, in kitchen isles.” You only smirk in agreement. You both empty island put all things to the other sides. Suho lift you up by your waist, placing you on the edge of the island. Again kiss start, pull close to each other, feeling every skin. Not breaking the kiss, he unbuttons your shirt and pushes it down. He breaks the kiss, to see how lazily, his shirt hangs on your body. From back only your bare ass was cover and the long sleeves of his shirt covered your half hand. Back of his mind, he catches the elevator door ding and footsteps noise coming inside the penthouse. He pushes it away, try to concentrate on you like you were doing. He attacks your neck, collarbone, leaving sweet marks while your hand tight hold his neck and hair while he assaults your skin. Subconsciously he again catches noise of grasp and cough, he looks up and sees his nine friends looking at him with shock. He shouts, “WHAT HELL ARE YOU All DOING IN MY HOUSE?” While Minseokd reply, “We need to talk. Wait, who is she? We went to Mansion first and saw Youra there.” he hurriedly pulls a shirt over your shoulder. Eight pairs of eyes have already seen your bareback, which made him angry. As he does the button to prevent more damage, you paralyzed, silently your teary eyes ask a question, “Is this end of your relationship?”  

[kissingnamjoon]

Mafia!Hoseok  [Arranged Marriage] Part 2 

Summary: However, Hoseok really should have trained Y/N on how to protect herself better, because everyone knew you weren’t supposed to do anything that blocked one of your senses while you were alone. You had to see, hear, smell, and feel whatever was going on around you. Being alone  and not aware of anything of those things was making yourself a target.  And that’s what Y/N was tonight. A target.

Pairing: Jung Hoseok x Reader

Words: Ayeee 2,082

Genre: A lil angst, A lil fluff, A lil mafia stuff  

Warnings: Violence, cursing, death, someone getting drugged, IDK 

A/N: I’m in love w/ my own series.  Also, sorry Got7 fans. Jackson’s name just popped into my head jadgsdfkdk okok ok enjoy bby’s!!!!!

She thought things would be different after that night. Her wedding night. They should have been, right? She just got married, for heaven’s sake. She should have been enjoying the honeymoon stage that all couples go through.

 But she couldn’t help but feel disappointed in herself.

 Disappointed that she thought her marriage or Hoseok was going to be different. Hoseok was involved in organized crime, what made her think that he knew how to act anything else but cold and emotionless? She thought maybe the words Hoseok said to her on their wedding night were just for show. They stayed together all through the night after that, but after all the guests had left they had went home in separate cars.

 To make her feel even more disappointed, Hoseok didn’t even want to sleep in the same room as her.

 She remembered when they got home that night, in separate cars. Hoseok had left and went into the house without acknowledging you. All your stuff was already here, but that didn’t make it feel like home.  She remembers walking inside and admiring the beauty of the house. It really was like a piece of art, marble staircase spiraling to the second floor of the house, with shiny rails and a grand chandelier hanging in the center of the ceiling. Sure, her family’s house was nice, but it was nothing compared to this. Everything down to the walls looked like they cost a million bucks.

 She  had lived like that for a couple weeks, in her own room, minding her  own business most of the time.  Most of Hoseok’ s men and their wives lived on the property, as there were a couple of guest’s houses scattered around. Since she was  married to Hoseok now, he deemed it to much of a threat for her to go back to her regular job where she could be considered an easy target, so she stayed behind and  worked more with Hoseok’ s team. Most of the wives weren’t allowed to go out on “missions” or “deals” as Hoseok referred to them, but they always helped them prepare.

 Currently, Hoseok and his men were getting ready to go out on a deal.

 “The shipment is coming in at 8 P.M sharp, so we need to leave soon. Jungkook, you’re going to guard the back entrance, and Yoongi, I need you to hack the system in the main office to erase any sign of the shipment coming in at the dock. Jimin, you’re coming with us, but you need to stay logged into the security cameras for the house. Jackson knows that our house will empty. I don’t think they’ll try anything, but you never know. ” Hoseok said, looking each and everyone of his men in the eye while he gave them directions.

 She wishes he looked her in the eye. She wished he gave her a soft kiss on the lips and promised to return home in one piece like his men did to their wives. She wishes she got to sleep in the same room as her husband. Hell, she wished he even talked to her.

 She knew deep down inside she couldn’t lie to herself and say she didn’t have feelings for Hoseok. And that really was such a weird thought for a married woman, but that was her life now. She didn’t even really know the person she was married too. Hoseok was extremely hard working, and you can tell he tried to protect his people at all costs. He cared about his empire, but he cared about his team even more. He was also precise and clean, never leaving a trace of a deal.  From Y/N’s perspective, Hoseok was an extremely intelligent and passionate man.

Just not towards her.

Hoseok was very cold towards her. If they were passing in the hallway, he would pretend he didn’t see her and keep walking, not saying a word.  He never kissed her goodbye or promised to return. He never asked how she was. He just left her to do her own thing, with Namjoon guarding her.

 She didn’t know it was because Hoseok didn’t know how to show his feelings.

 That he was secretly falling for her.  She was bright eyed and very diligent, always getting any task done that one of his men asked her to do. She also got along well with the other mafia wives, almost leading them and making sure everything was done sharply.

 Y/N sighed as she went back to her room. She had been feeling down but watching how Jungkook’s wife Youra kissed him and hugged him protectively in front of everyone, sparked a flame of jealousy inside of her.

 She wanted to be like that. She wanted to be in loved and loved by her husband. But she was nothing but a business deal when she thought about it. Why would she even think her and Hoseok could be like that?

 She decided she was going to relax a little bit and put some music on. She wanted to block out her feelings and have a stress-free night for once. She turned on her playlist and put her earphones in, not hearing a single sound around her. She decided to start drawing in her notebook, which she hasn’t even done since she was married. Y/N used to draw in her free time, drawing anything and everything that came to mind. None of her art was perfect, but she did it to relax, not to be perfect.

However, Hoseok really should have trained Y/N on how to protect herself better, because everyone knew you weren’t supposed to do anything that blocked one of your senses while you were alone. You had to see, hear, smell, and feel whatever was going on around you. Being alone  and not aware of anything of those things was making yourself a target.

 And that’s what Y/N was tonight.

 A target.

 You see, everyone else in the house was asleep and Y/N couldn’t hear, so she was obvious when someone broke in through the window and snuck into her room. She didn’t hear anyone behind her until it was too late and there was a needle stabbed into the side of her neck. She soon realized what was going on but felt something overtake her body. She couldn’t form a sentence or cry out for help, it was almost like she was paralyzed. She didn’t remember falling over onto her bedroom floor, or someone picking up her lifeless body and trying to sneak out of the window.

 Trying.

 You see, Jackson and his men were fast.

 But Hoseok was faster than all of them combined.

 Just as they were finishing up and getting ready to go back home, Jimin had alerted Hoseok that the security cameras had caught someone breaking in the house.

 “Boss, the security camera is showing movement on the east side of the house, outside of the cherry blossom tree.”

 East side of the house.

 Cherry blossom tree.

 Hoseok’ s eyes widened in shock as he realized your room was on the east side of the house, and the cherry blossom tree was outside of your room.

 “Fuck, I should have never let Namjoon come tonight!”

“Guys, we have to go back to the house right now, I don’t care if you leave the equipment.”

“Jimin, take the front entrance. Taehyung guard the east side entrance of the house. Jungkook you’ll guard the back, the rest of you just follow me.”

 Those were just a few of the sentences Hoseok let out before they all made a run for it, back to the house. Hoseok couldn’t believe that the first time he left you alone, was when you were attacked. It made sense though, he just didn’t expect for you to be a target so soon.

 Hoseok busted down the front door and the rest of his team were surprised. Namjoon and Jungkook just gave each other a knowing look. Namjoon could tell right away that Hoseok was falling in love with Y/N. If he wasn’t, he wouldn’t have followed her to the bathroom that night. And the fact that Hoseok assigned Namjoon, the best guard and fastest fighter out of all them, to protect Y/N and not Hoseok anymore, said everything.

 Namjoon had made it to her room just as one of Jackson’s men were dragging her out, immediately jumping him and kicking him to the ground. Hoseok’ s eyes flared up in anger and he was almost glad Y/N was  passed out to witness was he was about to do. You see, once you pissed off Hoseok there was no turning back. It was like a switch was turned on in him and he would become the most cold, brutal person you had ever met. Hoseok didn’t want you to see that side of him. He was already distant towards her, what would she think if she really saw him in action?

 Hoseok pulled out his knife pushed Namjoon off the man, immediately stabbing him in his jugular vein in just one attempt. Blood immediately spewed out of his neck and down his chest as he collapsed to the ground. It was almost like he was dead in an instant, but this wasn’t enough for Hoseok. He pulled out his handgun that was tucked underneath the waistband of his pants, shooting him multiple times before taking a picture of the dead body and sending it to Jackson.

‘Try touching Y/N again. I dare you.’ Was the accompanying texts Hoseok wrote out?

 Hoseok immediately assigned their personal doctor Seokjin to take care of Y/N, and make sure she was alright. Jin carefully removed the needle from her neck and inspected the liquid inside. He gave Y/N some medicine to counter-effect the drug that was in the needle. After Jin assured Hoseok and everybody else that she was okay, a look of surprise spread over everyone’s face when Hoseok ordered Jin to carry Y/N to his room.

 “You want me to take Y/N to YOUR room?”

Hoseok just looked at him dead in the eye, with a blank expression. “Not my room. Mine and Y/N’s room.”

“Taehyung………Yoongi, clean this pile of shit up.” Hoseok said as he walked past the dead body, kicking the dead man in his ribs and walking off to his room. As he walked down the hall and reach his door, he turned around and face his men. “Namjoon, stay on guard tonight. Outside our door. Sleep in the hallway if you have too, just made sure nothing is in harm’s way for Y/N.”

 Y/N’s head hurt, and her neck was incredibly sore. There was some sort of bandage on it, she was sure of. Her eyes started to flutter open, but she just wanted to go back to sleep.

 She shot out of bed in panic as she remembers a man dressed in all black and a needle going through her neck.  She had never seen this room before, where was she? Tears welled up in her eyes as she got out of bed and tried to stand, her legs wobbly.

 “Woah woah woah… you need to lay down.” Hoseok said as he came out of the shower, catching Y/N and laying her gently back down on the bed. Y/N looked up at him, admiring him. He looked so good right now. Wet hair hanging in front of his eyes, skin glowing and dressed in a simple pair of boxers and t-shirt. No fancy suit or shoes, no gun in his hand.

 “A rival gang member attacked you. I’m so sorry I left without making sure you were protected, it won’t happen again. We’re going to sleeping in the same room from now on. God, I was so stupid to let you have your own room, you’re my wife!!” Hoseok sat down on the bed next to her, wrapping his arms around her and  pulling her close to his chest, an action that surprised her. “Namjoon is going to be your personal guard. He’s the best and quickest out of all the men. I know it’s annoying, but you can’t be left alone. I have too many enemies.” Y/N looked up at Hoseok with soft eyes, opening her mouth to speak but nothing came out.

 Hoseok shh’ed her and laid down in the huge, cozy bed with her, pulling blankets over their bodies. “Just rest, my queen. Go to sleep. You’re safe from now on, I promise.”

[1ovebeat]

Youra (유라) - My

[maginoire-blog]

This is a major ramble about connections and how I mentally connect all my muses together. Bear with me if you plan to read this, it’ll be a lot of jumping around.

So some of my muses know of one another. Some of them more personally, some not so much.

Jaesang is known in general cause of his fame and name. But more specifically, he’s spoken to and worked with Youra, and obviously Jennie who works under him. Due to all stuff he gets caught up in, he’s also hired Soomin as a personal lawyer and has her on speed dial. Soomin isn’t very fond of him, but they’re similar people. In turn, he’s also briefly seen Hanuel in the times he’s been in and out of court for either himself or his idols.

Ara, at the very least, knows of the bigger name muses. She’s passed Jaesang briefly when working on a column about idols, and in turn has also seen Jennie flitting by. She’s seen Ebony’s interviews when her company first came to be and had a big hold on the arms industry. It wasn’t necessarily because Ara reports on anything like that, but because Ebony’s company drew some international attention. She has yet to interact with Youra, but once again has heard about her simply due to her name and fame. I have a headcanon that Ara frequents the bar that Yerim sings at, so she’s definitely made eye contact and drunken conversation with the girl.

Besides connections already mentioned, Ebony has contacted Jaesang in the past. Only for business and only when she really needed something from him. Her weapons deal with magic and he has no limits if money is involved, so he’s a last resort but a trustworthy one if she can bring up the necessary funds. Similarly to Jaesang, Ebony has also turned to Soomin for legal advice when caught in scandals and trying to hide her proprietary information from the public. She’s avoided Hanuel at all costs, or in general, angels at all cost because their presence makes her uncomfortable.

Youra has come across Jaesang as mentioned previously, but has also come across Yerim. This was when she had first been starting out and building her name in the community. It had been a local fundraiser event, and although she barely remembers the bar singer, she would be able to pluck her voice out from a crowd any day. She’s also frequented Minwoo’s bookstore because of the vast amount of braille books available and the way he tells stories about the manga he’s drawn.

Because Jennie often lives in Jaesang’s shadow, she is perhaps the one least connected to the rest. The only other individual she’s spoken to in my list of muses is Hanuel. Something about the two bonded them over drinks and they often find each other in one another’s company.

Being the introvert he is, Minwoo’s personal connections cut short with Youra here as well. In her free time, Yerim has attended Youra’s concerts after that one show together. She very much considers herself a fan. She knows of Jaesang, but only because he’s a manager of one of her favourite idols. Although she has yet to interact with Minwoo, she has seen his art that he’s posted online and considers herself a follower of his talent. He’s begun to post his own little manga online and it’s a bookmarked tab in her browser.

I imagine my little weirdo Haneul to have flickered in and out of everyone’s lives but silently and simply watching. Knowing that Ebony avoids him has him trailing behind her relatively often. Asides from Jennie, his interactions are heavily centered around Soomin due to their work. Hanuel has a slight obsession over the girl in gloves as well, but because she doesn’t physically run from him, he watches from the sidelines. He wants to save her from herself, but can’t seem to figure out how.

And lastly, Reve. Reve has been in every single muse’s life. They’ve all had their demons or imaginary friends or nightmares. Reve has always been there.

[solplparty]

𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒚𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 | 시원한 곳에서 맥주 마시며 듣기 좋은 노래들 :: K-INDIE PICKS :: https://youtu.be/z2a-Xyu-0To 00:00 유라 (youra) - Jungle Bike 02:47 실리카겔 (Silica Gel) - Kyo181 07:00 혁오 (HYUKOH) - Wanli万里 11:57 sogumm - 아니 벌써 (So Soon) 15:03 off the menu (오프 더 메뉴) - The Wall 19:35 이루리 (Luli Lee) - Dive 23:17 나상현씨밴드 (Band Nah) - 불빛 (Lights) 26:59 Tuesday Beach Club - LOBSTER KING 30:17 언니네 이발관 (Sister's Barbershop) - 나쁜 꿈 (Bad dream) 36:02 우효 (OOHYO) - BRAVE (single cut) 40:28 카더가든 (Car, the garden) - 유영 (Feat. 유라) (Floating (Feat. youra)) 44:20 임금비 (Keumbee) - Sneakin' Into Your Heart 47:32 새소년 (SE SO NEON) - joke! 50:55 해서웨이 (hathaw9y) - Flame 54:55 한로로 (HANRORO) - 입춘 (Let Me Love My Youth) 59:04 Colde (콜드) - 울프 (Wolf) 01:03:12 SURL (설) - Aloha My Love 01:06:15 The Poles (더 폴스) - Sun Shower 01:10:58 케빈오 (Kevin Oh), 프라이머리 (Primary) - Crazy 01:15:08 검정치마 (The Black Skirts) - 하와이 검은 모래 (Hawaiian black sand) #인디음악 #플레이리스트 #여름휴가 #rock - Photo : aespa 닝닝, 윈터 (@aespa_official) - More about MUN HWA IN ▶https://www.munhwain.kr ▶https://www.facebook.com/munhwainkr ▶https://www.instagram.com/munhwain_of... ▶https://spoti.fi/3oph4ja (Spotify playlist) ▶http://blog.naver.com/munhwain_official ▶https://twitter.com/munhwainkr 문화인 - MUN HWA IN