#your paths might diverge and though the periods without can hurt and will be bitter you always have the memories you carry with you

[tragedykery]

btw in case you can't tell I fuckign love. peaches. fruit of all time methinks

[saras-almanac]

I don’t know if i am getting to deep about this (probably) but i’m kinda sad that robert got to briefly talk about his feelings saying there’s stuff he’s done keeping him awake at night at the worst possible time. i just wish they explored more of this when he actually had a support network around him. and he probably meant trying to kill paddy and chas, but that’s not the point. i don’t know guess it just upsets me a bit that we got an insight into his feelings at a horrible time.

Thank you so much for this ask because I could talk about #JusticeforRobert centric storylines until I die. And to be honest, I probably will because… he just deserved one? And the fact that there is/was so much potential for things to explore with Robert and the show just sort of chose not to, is annoying. Especially because Ryan could have carried an intense storyline (he literally carried 2017) and Danny/Aaron could have been this supportive husband. It would have been great for the people around them to really see Aaron supporting Robert through something. They sort of did that with the reunion 2.0 and Seb storyline (and even Rebecca’s disappearance) but it wasn’t really enough. 

The biggest frustration, sort of like you said, is that we just didn’t spend a lot of time with Robert’s feelings on things. I’m not trying to say we got nothing, but the BIG storylines that should have put Robert front and center (his coming out, his shooting, his reluctance to fatherhood, his prison sentence) shove his feelings and Robert to the side in lieu of someone else, someone who might be “more important” or needing the focus more. Now I could say that it’s sort of Robert’s character to hide his feelings because he doesn’t like showing them and being vulnerable while also never wanting to be a burden to anyone, that’s not really an excuse for the show to choose that path. 

Under the cut because this became a monster on points I have literally no idea of whether or not you wanted to read about! 

Robert’s Coming Out – What we could have had. 

Now, as a bisexual, I wish we’d have gotten more of Robert’s POV as he was outed against his will and the fallout. Even if we didn’t get it right away, they wrote in multiple times where people call him gay or throw his sexuality in his face and Robert never really got a chance to fight back for that. He stands up the most with Aaron and while the other times might just be a matter of, It’s really not worth it to fight for this cause the other person clearly doesn’t care… It just shouldn’t have taken so long to get the reveal and backstory of how his sexuality (and suppression) has affected him. 

Again, I would never want to take that moment in the woods away because it was literally perfect: the context, the reveal, the desperation of just wanting to be himself with Aaron. But there’s no reason that we couldn’t have been privy to some of Robert’s thoughts about this before that point. Especially after his shooting. 

Robert’s Shooting – Was Robert even there for that? 

I’m gonna be honest and say that I’m probably the most annoyed about this lack of storyline for Robert. He was literally shot and it became all about Andy and Aaron. While their stories played a massive part in everything that happened, it came at the complete erasure of Robert. He was shot. His entire life was changed. He thought someone he loved, someone who loved him–all of him and even the awful parts–tried to kill him. That literally shook Robert down to his core. We see it in the two instances where Robert is faced with that reality. But then he realizes Andy’s behind it, gets Aaron out of prison, and it’s literally never brought up again. Don’t you think that might have caused a shift in Robert? A fear or an even bigger desperation to prove himself? Or that his fear that he wasn’t worth it and no one could ever really love him was back in full force? 

But the show decided to not give any time to that. 

They also didn’t give any time to Robert’s recovery any focus at all. There’s the comment with Adam and Andy when Vic first brings Robert back from the hospital where they comment on how he doesn’t look like himself. I think there’s a scene where Robert first goes to the pub, but all the Dingles are mad at him because Aaron’s in prison… Though that’s not Robert’s fault? He was the one who shot? He literally was in a coma for like a month… But sure? I guess, go off on him Dingles? It all makes sense that Aaron would be angry because, as much as he claimed to hate Robert, he’d never try to kill him. And I think, honestly, the fact that Robert thought so for even a little while probably cut Aaron. 

But other than those two scenes, Robert’s basically right as rain. Except for the moment his stitches tear after saving Andy from the car. 

This period of time is meant to be Robert’s metamorphosis. He’s changing from scheming, angry, bitter chancer to someone who actively wants to be better and is, ultimately, looking for love. The problem is, it’s not really present. Not really. He says to Lawrence in the hell plot that was 2017, that it took the bullet to the chest to come to terms with his sexuality and himself. But where was that? Why did we not see that? 

We saw the one, beautiful, shining moment that showed (a bit) that Robert was trying to be better, to do better as his shooting and realizing just how much he’s hurt people, people he did care about. Robert goes to court for Chrissie’s trial and speaks out in her defense, taking responsibility for upsetting Chrissie and giving her a defense. It was unexpected and beautiful… but then they did nothing with that? They sort of forgot it and, of course, they had to go back to be antagonist towards each other. Which fine. 

The only thing we really get after Robert’s shooting, is his determination to win Aaron back. Which is wonderful and I loved it, but it was about Robert trying to prove himself to Aaron, not really about showing us the changes. We did get them, his current ending storyline is proof of that, but it just sort of feels like a little bit of a wasted opportunity to really explore Robert’s character and the regrets he had. 

I think the biggest Robert-focused (if we can call it that) storyline that showcased his changes, would be the abuse era and how he literally put everything on hold to be there for Aaron, as much as he possibly could. And it was great, but I just feel like they could have done more with Robert before this point. So we as the viewer could know how much Robert changed and how badly he wanted Aaron back, how much he loved him. But they chose not to. 

And then after they got back together, there was no real storyline for Robert. Yes, he was present for Liv going to youth offenders, but that was clearly framed as Aaron’s “obstacle.” His seizure and running himself ragged, was more about what might be happening to Rebecca. It’s fine that he’s not front and center always because… it’s an ensemble show, but I really feel like any story he might have been the center for, they shifted the focus so it wasn’t on him. 

Okay so 2017… Yes, Robert and his breakdown was a focus… but like… It wasn’t that good? I get that the writers were like, he’s regressing cause of his breakup with Aaron and that’s true on one hand… but it also felt a bit… over-the-top? It wasn’t nuanced, but Robert was the focus so I guess, be careful what you wish for, Sara. (That’s on me). 

Basically, I completely understand your frustration that we got a small glimpse into Robert’s state of mind right before he’s leaving. I am taking that more as a way to prove to himself and Aaron that Robert deserves to be in prison. He’s messed up, hurt people, and done so many things that he’s ashamed of and/or regrets, so this is his penance. (It’s bullshit, babe. You don’t deserve any of this). So if they don’t try and use it as a way for Robert to push Aaron away which… will suck if that’s the route they’re choosing. Because… no. Literally, have Robert tell Aaron not to visit him because he gave himself up so Aaron could have a life. And Aaron could cry and argue that he doesn’t want a life that doesn’t include Robert in it. Then Robert, switching tactics, says that it’s killing him to only see Aaron once a week, talk every few days–it killed him when Aaron was inside and it’s going to kill him to do this for the next 20 years. So he tells Aaron to please, let him go because it’s just going to be too hard for Robert to see him in prison visiting rooms. (Of course, this means that Aaron can’t get Seb because… then Robert doesn’t get to see his son either? But whatever.) 

By having Robert frame it as what he needs–to be alone and not be constantly reminded of what he’s missing–it’s the only, only way I could see Aaron not fighting and pushing him. Because they would always and will always sacrifice their own happiness for their husband’s security and needs. (But I assume they won’t.)

Obviously, I want Aaron to fight to stay with Robert because why would he want to be without him? Why would he just give up on the love of his life, especially knowing how hard and lonely prison is? And it’s not like Robert’s family gives any sort of fuck about him. 

So after this week, I’ll probably live in my own canon of them staying together and Robert’s solicitor and new prison BFF DC Pierce working on an appeal to lessen Robert’s charge from murder to manslaughter because… it’s fiction and it can be done–and they love Robert as much as us. So he gets out in a much smaller sentence. And also… all the massive AUs and Canon divergents that I want to write that might actually address some of these storylines and making Robert if not a main player, at least an equal player. (If anyone’s interested in them in the future.) 

Thank you for giving me something to focus on and to write this massive essay for no reason but to procrastinate my Robert Week fics… (I don’t have tomorrow’s yet. Oops.)