#your messages are creepy and off putting especially knowing your circumstance

[rambler-in-limbo]

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[justreadingfics]

It’s a Deal (Chapter 5)

Chapter Summary: Movie nights are the best.  

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Words: 4.8k

Warnings:+18 only, smut,  boytoy!Bucky, fingering in a room with other people in it, blow job, oral (female receiving) casual sex, opened relationship, 

A/N: I’m sorry it took me so long for this one. I can’t promise it won’t happen the same with next chapter, but I sure hope not. I previously said the next chapters would be less smut, but with these two you never know… Thank you to my sweet Les for having my back. The link to my masterlist, where you can find the other chapters, is on my description. Feedback is highly appreciated.

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Your breathing is heavy.  

The silky slide of his tongue makes you moan, deep, and you dig your nails on his scalp, pulling his hair even harder. He groans and the vibrations hit your core. He was right the other day, you love grabbing his hair, especially when you’re on his bed and his head is between your legs first thing in the morning.

No, you haven’t slept there that night. It would be your first day in your new job position and you thought it would be best to have a good and uneventful night of sleep, free of any action that could keep you up. But the thing with good nights of sleep is they’re actually not as relaxing as Bucky Barnes’s sweet tongue and you decided you needed it before you started the day.

Good thing he lives where you work and he didn’t turn you down when you called him at that ungodly hour.  That’s how you end up there, at the verge of a morning orgasm, your skirt and underwear tossed somewhere in his bedroom and you only wearing your heels and your white blouse while he’s eating you out on his bed, butt-naked, because that’s just how he sleeps every night. 

“Oh, fucking shitballs,” you curse when he closes his lips around your clit. The throbbing little nub is swollen and aching for a release.  

He chuckles against your sensitive and wet pussy, pulling you harder against his face, deepening his fingers on your thighs. Deeply focused on his task, he flattens his tongue and laps at you.

The change of movements doesn’t go unnoticed by you, who cries out at the waves of pleasure rushing up your body. A few more talented strokes of his tongue and you lose it. You moan a loud chant of courses and your back arches as your shivering legs shut around his head and your heels cross over his back.

That’s when a huge bang breaks into your dreamy state and makes you shout and jump on the bed, your face snapping towards the loud sound.

“I fucking knew it.”

Natasha’s voice isn’t one you were expecting to hear at that moment, and it takes you a moment to understand what is happening. There is your friend, in full tactical gear, arms smugly crossed in front of her body while she stands by the door she has just kicked opened. It takes you an even longer moment to remember the position you’re in. You look down to see Bucky, smirking, peeking at her from between your thighs, his face glistening with your juices all around it.

“What the hell?” You shout, finally releasing him from the clasp of your legs and pulling the first piece of fabric you find on his bed over your exposed lower half as you swiftly drag yourself away from him.

“Does Fury need me again?” Bucky asks, completely unbothered by Nat’s presence or his nakedness… or his extremely evident hard on, you notice, when he stands up from the spot he was bent down, before jumping to lay down beside you.

Something tells you this isn’t a one-time occurrence, but it doesn’t change the fact that is happening to you and how hot your cheeks are from sheer embarrassment in getting caught in such a situation.

“Nice hair, stud,” she comments, gaining a smug expression in response, before continuing, “He needs her, actually. Congratulations on your promotion, by the way,” Natasha smirks, pointing at you and your heart rushes up to beat against your throat at the mention of Fury’s name.

“What? Holy fuck,” you curse, wrapping the sheet around you before flying out of the bed and moving to pick up your pieces of clothes tossed by the floor.

“Told you she would be here, Steve,” Natasha tilts her head to behind her shoulder.  

A low, strangled grunt comes from the living room.

That makes you halt at once as you bend down to pick your underwear. Incredibly widened eyes snap at Natasha. As your cheeks burn hotter than ever, she covers her mouth with the back of her hand, obviously holding back a mischievous laugh.

“Hey, Punk,” Bucky shouts from the bed.

“You should’ve seen his face at fucking, shitballs.” Nat bursts out in uncontained laughs, followed shortly by Bucky. 

You can’t believe it. Captain Fucking America is waiting on the next room as you pick up your clothes after he heard the mind-blowing orgasm given by his friend to you on your first day on your new job - one that will require that you’d meet with the Avenger often - and you’re as mortified as you’d ever be. You know Nat enough to know she doesn’t mean any harm by it all, and you’ll know that eventually you will laugh with her about that moment, but eventually it’s definitely not now and she’s obviously having too much fun with your misery, so a little wish for vengeance burns up inside you.

“She told me you gave her the best orgasm of her life,” you blurt out, looking at Bucky, but the underwear in your hands at her. You bolt to the bathroom right after, locking the door behind you, but not before glimpsing the outraged expression on her face.

“You damn traitor,” Natasha yells, as you rush to put yourself together inside the bathroom.

“Well, looks like we’re a good pair,” you yell back.

“Calm down, ladies…” Bucky says and you can hear the amusement in his voice, as you work to freshen up, “Don’t worry, Steve would die before acknowledge this ever happened,” he raises his voice for you to hear, as an evident attempt to soothe you, but you can’t say it’s as effective as he would expect. “And you,” you guess he’s speaking to Natasha, “like I didn’t know that already. You were very vocal at the time and seemed like you’d forgotten I understand Russian perfectly.”

As put together as you can be in that situation, dying to bolt away and having Fury waiting for your ass, you open the bathroom’s door soon enough to see Nat flipping Bucky off as he cheekily winks at her.

“Ok.” You tap your hands down your skirt to straighten the little wrinkles on the fabric, “How do I look?” you ask Natasha. The formal outfit is way different from your usual jeans and sneakers, but it’s your first day in a very important position. Dress to impress felt like the right choice.  

“Stunning.” The answer comes from both Nat and Bucky and you can only let yourself soften as they smile at each other, a clear sign of peace.

“Alright,” you nod, walking to grab your purse on the armchair next to his bed, “Ahm… thank you, Bucky,” you seriously don’t know what else you can say to him at that moment.

“Anytime, sweetheart, you know that,” he makes a reverence, before linking his hands behind his head with a very pleased tug on the corner of his lips.

You clear your throat, trying to not indulge him in a less than perfect circumstances, before turning to a too amused Natasha. 

“See you tonight?” she asks, tilting her head.

“Yeah, of course,” you sigh, all the annoyance completely gone, “Welcome back, talk to you later.” You say goodbye by placing a kiss on her cheeks.

As you rush across the living room and towards the way out, Captain Fucking America looks absolutely guilty and red as the stripes on his uniform, “I told her not to, but-“

“I know,” you sure do know how determined Natasha Romanoff can be, “Can we please never talk about it again?”

“Gladly,” he quickly answers, looking as relieved as you before you bolt out of Bucky’s apartment.

~~~

His cell phone buzzes in his pocket and he picks it up as the elevator runs up to the common floor. He’s dying for one of Wanda’s cookies, which she usually bakes at this hour for everyone. Unlocking the screen he sees the text. It’s from Olivia, asking if he has plans for that night, with a winkie emoji at the end. Emojis… he loves them, one of the best things from the future.

He's about to type the answer when the elevator doors open and he hears the sound of a movie playing loudly in the TV room. Oh, so there’s one of those movie night things going… the cookies will definitely be there.

He quickly steps towards the sound and opens the door to the dark room, meeting a few squinting expressions at the light that shines from behind him. As soon as he finds one particular scrunched face among the other ones his lips curl in a smirk and, before putting his phone back in his pocket, he types a quick reply saying he’s already got plans, the same answer he’s given to every other message he’s received those last few weeks that wasn’t from the woman greeting him with a small and discreet smile right now.

“So soon at home?” Natasha asks, munching a mouthful of popcorn. Along with her in the room are Sam, seating next to her on one of the sofas, Steve and Sharon sharing an armchair and a bowl of popcorn, Wanda  laying on some big cushions on the floor, eating one of her cookies while she, the face that got his attention and instant interest, is comfortably seating all by herself on a big and inviting sofa, cozily tucked under a blanket.

“Didn’t even go out,” Bucky shrugs, “Movie night, huh?” He peeks in, averting his gaze from her to the big screen, “And one of my favorite movies I see..” he says, having absolutely no idea which movie that is and why there’s a creepy guy talking to a ball in the middle of an island.   

“In or out, dude,” Sam throws some popcorn on him, “Shut the damn door.”

“Alright, alright,” Bucky does as he says, not even engaging with Sam’s teasing. He has other things occupying his mind.

And said “other things” eyes him suspiciously as he walks towards the sofa she’s been occupying alone. He doesn’t say anything before throwing himself on the cushions, right next to her, despite all the space left. He can feel everyone’s eyes, maybe except Sam’s, lingering on him for a little too long, but it doesn’t bother him at all as he makes himself comfortable, reaching over to grab a cookie from the plate on the small table in front of him.

“Hi,” he whispers, turning to face her.   

“Hi,” she answers back with a small smile, before focusing on the movie again.  

“You don’t mind do you?” Bucky once again whispers, pulling the end of her blanket while he munches the cookie.

She eyes him for a moment and he has to hold back a laugh. She has to know where he’s going with this and if that time they’ve spent together because of their deal made him get to know her at least a bit, he bets she’ll play along with him.   

“No?” her answer comes out on a wary whisper and he doesn’t waste a second before sinking beneath her blanket, dragging himself a bit closer to her.

When he’s cozy enough, he turns to the movie again, pretending to be paying attention to the screen while she does the same. He knows it’s all a façade and she’s waiting to find out what he’s up to. He loves it. It’s only after several minutes – teasing her is always good fun – that his hand under the blanket casually navigates through the cushions and rests on her thigh.

As soon as his hand touches her skin, he senses the flinch of her body. While he shoves the last piece of cookie in his mouth, with the corner of his eyes, he catches when she glances not at him, but at the rest of the group in the room.  The fact she doesn’t bat his hand right away, encourages him to give her thigh a pointed squeeze and that’s when she shoots him a warning glare. Which he ignores, of course, in favor of letting his hand snake up her smooth skin. The small hitch of her breath doesn’t go unnoticed by him.  

He smiles to find out she’s wearing a skirt.

When his hand moves down to the soft inner part of her thigh, she shuts her legs, trapping it in place. He doesn’t look at her while he just waits… all he has to do is to wait. He can tell she’s a bit nervous as he feels her eyes on him before they turn to the others, but a light and sweet scent, which is now very familiar, teases his nostrils, ever so lightly, and he knows she’s more than up to that little game. He hopes for the other super soldier in the room to be focused enough on his girl next to him so he doesn’t catch the faint scent in the air.

He waits.

The confirmation of her true disposition comes when she slowly opens her legs and shifts on the sofa, lifting one knee up so the blanket makes a tent, making it hard for anyone to spot where his hand really lays beneath the blanket.

Bucky is then more than happy to resume his ascend until he cups her mound through the cotton of her underwear. He keeps his touch light, barely brushing her mound, noticing a little wetness pulling at the fabric and smirking. But what makes him almost lose his shit is to find out how impatiently up to his game she actually is, when she dips her hand under the blanket and guides his hand  beneath the cotton, letting his fingers rest on her clit before she removes her hand.

Goddamit, he has to hold back to not let a loud moan both at her initiative and the warm and smooth feeling on his fingers. He can’t believe how lucky he is to be spending this time and sharing moments like this with her. He has to admit that this deal he has set with her is the best thing that has happened to him in a while. Yes, he has a great deal of women he can call his friends and has been spending time with. But with her…

Bucky’s sure he has found his partner in crime.

He’s aware of the long time she’s been in a relationship and he knows the ending wasn’t that great. But in spite of that, she trusts him completely to make her feel good and not hurt her in any way, and he loves that he can do that… Make her feel good.

He starts caressing her clit, noticing how her body responds, a tiny hitch on her breathing, her lower lip between her teeth… He doesn’t want to make her wait much longer, seeing how eager she definitely is. Another thing he adores about her… she’s always up to go a bit further with him, to break some limits. He would never do anything she’s not comfortable with, but it’s addicting her willingness for more, to go beyond herself to reach the goal or finding pleasure and a good time.

Truly a partner in crime.

Her gaze remains on the screen while he fingers her under the blanket, but he can hear a particularly louder sigh as her head falls back on the sofa.

Bucky looks around but no one seems to have noticed anything, paying attention to  whatever is happening in the movie. Discreetly, he grabs a small pillow from the sofa and places it over his lap to hide how much the mission to drive her to the edge  and the wetness gathering around his fingers under the blanket are affecting him.

He has learned the way her body works enough to know she’s almost there. Also, he knows she has a thing for exposed and dangerous situations like that, the thrilling possibility of getting caught, the filthy actions in an otherwise innocent situation… Fuck if his cock isn’t aching for some attention, too…If had his way he would bent her over that couch and take her right then and there, to hell with everyone else.

Glancing at her, he spots the clenched jaw and fluttering eyelids. She comes all over his fingers without making a single noise and, damn, she turns him on so much.   

After a few more strokes to ease her down, he pulls his fingers away and, as she watches him from the corner of her eyes, he brings them to his lips, licking them deliciously as he stares at the movie. Her sweet taste makes him painfully hard beneath his jeans and that’s when she surprises him by throwing the blanket to the side and swiftly getting up.

“Are you ok?” Nat asks as all the faces snap to the woman standing up.

“Yeah, sure. Just need to go to the bathroom. No need to pause the movie, I’ll be quick,” she answers, but she doesn’t leave the room without glancing at Bucky with a small tug on the corner of her lips.

His cock twitches at it… That’s his cue, right? It has to be, or else he’ll explode right then and there. He waits a few minutes for good measure before pulling his phone from the pocket. He pretends to be reading something on the screen before clicking his tongue, “Got to go. That was fun, though, let’s do it again sometime.”

Bucky’s damn sure Natasha not for a second buys the excuse as she shoots him a knowing smirk, but the others seem to at least don’t care about him leaving - suspiciously right after her- only mumbling their goodbyes as their attention remains in the movie.

When he opens the door to the bathroom, which is only a few feet away from the tv room, he’s greeted with a pair of lips crashing against his. Responding right away to the kiss, he kicks the door shut behind him and wraps his arms around her as he relishes  the feel of her hands exploring his whole body, grabbing his muscles and flesh. Good, she’s as excited as him.

“That was fucking hot,” she says through the kiss, pulling a handful of his hair.

“Agreed,” he pants, not parting his lips from hers, “Check out how happy I was to find you here,” he grabs her hand and places it over his throbbing hard on.

She chuckles as he walks her backwards to the counter, “I’m glad I accepted Nat’s invitation to see a movie with her after dinner, then,” she pulls away just enough to say that before launching back on him, making him moan as she palms him through his jeans. “We need to do something about it, now,” she teases, parting her lips from his to drag them down his neck, adding a bit more of pressure on his cock.

“Damn straight,” he manages to say, as her mouth and her hands on him make him light in the head. Desperate to feel her, he grabs her by the waist and places her on the countertop and positions himself between her legs, reaching down to unbutton his jeans, “How was your first day as the boss?” Just the thought is enough to make his cock twitch inside the annoying confines of his pants.

“Fucking fantastic,” she answers putting a stopping hand on his chest and grabbing the one on his jeans by the pulse.

“Hey,” an embarrassing whine slips out of his lips.

“Nah-ah,” she smirks in such a mischievous way that the sight alone could result in him making a mess of his pants if he didn’t focus, “I’ve got my own tricks, too, you know?” she coos, pushing him a bit backwards before sliding down from the counter and sinking to her knees right in front of him.

Oh…

Since she just ended the possibility of any coherent thought to be formed on his mind, all there’s left for him is to let his arms fall limp on each side of his body and watch her, dumbfounded and horny as ever, as she nuzzless his dick through the jeans and swiftly work on his buttons and zipper.

His cock bobs in front of her as she pulls down his pants and underwear just enough to expose it to her. Bucky is entranced by the sight of her licking her lips before leaning over and slowly sliding her flattened tongue over the length of the prominent vein on the underside of his cock. Then his tip is engulfed by the wet and soft heat of her mouth and a strangled yet loud noise slips out of his lungs as his eyelids flutter.

“Be quiet, sweetheart,” she pulls back, making him already miss her lips around his dick. He looks down at her and she shoots a cheeky wink at him, wrapping her hand around the base and peppering sweet, torturous kisses over his length and head, smearing the leaking precum over her lips before wrapping them around him again.

Bucky is in a  complete daze as she works her lips and tongue beautifully on him, producing sloppy and enticing sounds. Surprisingly enough, after trying a lot of stuff together, that particular act hadn’t happened yet and goddammit why the hell had he waited for so long? Maybe because he’s been focusing completely on her pleasure, which can’t be considered an unselfish act at all, since giving her pleasure is insanely hot, making him get off on that easily. But, man… that woman knows what she’s doing and it’s driving him completely nuts right now.

Especially as she keeps jerking him with her hand while her lips adventures down his sack. All he sees is the top of her head moving as she is shamelessly licking and sucking his balls, the slurping sounds of her mouth on him makes his cock jerk in her hand. Bucky can’t hold back the moans and his hands grip tightly the counter before him, the blood rushing away from his fingers with the force he uses.

Her lips come back to suck on his dick, hollowing her cheeks as her other hand grabs a handful of his butt. She squeezes the flesh harshly and grunts around his dick.

“Fuck,” Bucky lets out in a breathless whisper, barely holding together as the vibrations reverberates through his pulsing cock, wrapped in her heat. He’s not gonna last long, he knows that.

With a pop, she releases his cock from her mouth, but keeps her hand wrapped and moving up and down his length. Bucky would’ve protested if he could form one coherent word, “Bucky,” she purrs, brushing her cheek on his cock, as if she’s worshiping it. He feels himself tighter and tighter, rushing to the edge, and that sight is no help for him trying to hold back and prolong the little heaven he’s in, “I want you to fuck my mouth, Bucky.”  

That’s it. He always knew that after more than one hundred years he would die in a situation like that, “What?” he breathes out and it sounds like a groan as he clenches his teeth.

“I want you to fuck my face and I want to taste you, all of you, understand?” Her words sound more like a command as she looks up at him and lazily fists his cock, coated in her saliva.

“Copy that, ma’am,” he quickly obeys, capturing his lower lip in a tight bite, “But if it’s too much you have to let me know, ok? Stop me, punch me in the stomach, if you have to.” As desperate as he is to do as she wants and fuck that pretty little face of hers, the last thing he wants is to hurt her in any way. But they’ve been pretty comfortable with each other to let the other know exactly what they want to do or not, so he doesn’t have to worry much about it.

She smirks and nods before brushing the tip of her tongue over the tip of his cock.

Fuck… she’s perfect.

More than happy to comply with her command, Bucky grips the hair on the back of her head as she invitingly opens her mouth to welcome him, letting her hands rest on her thighs.

He pushes back inside her. He goes slow at first, but goes deep, testing her limits. His breath hitches as he watches his cock disappearing inside her mouth, and oh, man… his head reaches her throat and he hears a strangled moan out of her as she chokes lightly on it…

He fucking loses it.

Bucky does exactly what she asked for and fucks her mouth, holding her face steady with one hand on her hair as with the other he grips the counter as he thrusts inside her, moving her head as he pleases, guiding himself by the muffled but sweet sounds she makes along with him. He goes deep, fast…

He locks eyes with her and sees the sheer lust on them as her swollen lips take his cock, saliva sliding down her chin, “Take that cock, sweetheart. You look fucking beautiful taking it like that.”

The fluttering of her eyes at his words is what takes him on the edge of his climax, “Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” he warns, his voice a strange rasped sound in his ears, “You want that, don’t you? You want my fucking cum deep down your throat, right, beautiful?”

Her answer is to bring both hands to grip harshly his butt and pull him even deeper into her. The tightness coiling inside him is too much before he reaches the best damn orgasm of his life.

A dangerously loud grunt of him resounds around the small bathroom as he spills his climax deep down her mouth and throat, just like he’s promised. The world around him dissolves into the image of her swallowing around him, taking all of him. He’s body falls a bit forward and he has to tighten the hold on the counter as fingers tangle around her locks.

He remains under the effect of the powerful and insanely pleasurable sensation, the aftershocks jerking his body and turning his mind into a total blankness as she slowly and gently sucks and licks him clean, making little humming sounds that only add to his utter state of bliss.

When he feels his strength rushing back to his limbs again, he moves his hand from her hair and helps her up by the arm and without thinking twice slams his lips to hers. 

Her inherent sweetness immediately mixes with his own taste, invading his senses and damn if he doesn’t wanna feel that again and again and again… He swirls his tongue around hers, loving how her arms curl around his neck, like they usually do when he kisses her.

Bucky doesn’t notice he’s been prolonging the kiss for maybe a little too long and maybe a little too intensely until she lets out a muffled giggle through his lips and taps lightly on his shoulder.

He parts away immediately, but doesn’t completely let her go, keeping her close by the waist, only then realizing how breathless he is. Both of them, actually as he notices how deep and fast the up and down of her chest is. But she’s smiling… and that alone makes Bucky smile, too.

She looks thoroughly fucked. Her hair is a complete mess, eyes a bit reddened and teary while her lips are swollen tinted in a darker shade and from taking his cock that hard. He simply can’t move his gaze away while she holds the smile, looking… content…happy…

Right there, just like that, completely undone and disheveled, she’s the most beautiful thing he has ever seen.

He’s not even thinking straight yet when he reaches over and cups her cheek. Spotting a drop of his own pleasure that slipped from the corner of her mouth, he swipes it with his thumb and brings it to her lips, entranced by the way she welcomes it right away, swirling her tongue around his finger before sucking it inside her mouth while her eyes are stuck on his.

His heart skips a beat at the sight. There’s an urge rising in him. A whole new kind of urge he hasn’t ever felt before and he can’t pinpoint exactly what that desperate need is for while she lets go of his thumb before placing a kiss on it and moves her back to him, to face the mirror and put herself together, depriving his arms from her warmth.

He just can’t take his eyes off of her and all he wants is to grab her back and hold her close to him, to feel her skin, smell the sweet scent of her shampoo, listen to her sweet voice in his ears telling him all about her day while she softly runs her fingers through his hair…

Wait… he forces himself to interrupt his own weird line of thoughts.

What the hell is happening?

~~~

 Chapter 6 coming soon.

[nukapind]

Inconvenience Store (Dabi X Reader)

A part two to Wet Floor was requested over on my AO3 and they gave me the full liberty of picking what to write as long as it got a part two, so here we are! Feel free to leave a comment/message/ask if y’all have any requests. Like usual, this was crossposted to my AO3.

Wet Floor (Part One)

___

Dabi was back at your little corner store the very next day.

And the next.

And the day after that too.

And soon it became a common circumstance to see Dabi to loiter around the store, almost always leaving you to pay for the noodles he’d be slurping on— usually while he watched in amusement as you’d stock up or clean the store, adding in a “you missed a spot” every so often with that shit-eating grin on his face.

Quitting was starting to sound pretty appealing.

Yet just as often as he’d be here, at your shitty little store— he’d disappear. The first time, he’d been gone for a week and you thought you were free from this mooch, only for you to find him waiting outside the store right as you came in to start your shift. Soon his disappearances were for weeks or even up to a month at a time, and yet he always ended up coming back through those sliding doors with a smirk painted on his face.

Today was one of the days he’d decided he’d bum off the store, seated behind the counter— though you’d told him not to go there countless times and he ignored you each time you did. Huffing, you made it a point to set the wet floor sign down with a loud thunk after you tossed the mop in the supply closet, there was no way you’d let yourself forget it again—  not after the punishment that Dabi himself was. Wreaking havoc on your wallet and using you as his source of meals.

“I’m getting another cup.” You didn’t bother to hide your growl at his words, he had to be eating this much just to spite you at this point— he probably wasn’t even enjoying them at this point, that was his third pack today. Rolling your eyes as you watched him take your water and pour it into the instant noodle cup, this guy really had no respect for anyone or their things did he?

It really didn’t matter that he’d always been there when you locked up, and followed you to your train each evening after you mentioned the gangs you’d passed. It also didn’t matter that despite how you resented the financial strain he was on your wallet, the best days were when he would sit behind the counter with you throughout your shift.

It really didn’t matter.

The beeping of the automatic doors opening smacked you right out of your thoughts; immediately plastering on that customer service smile you’d managed to perfect, despite the foul cursing towards Dabi that was ringing through your mind. “Hello! Let me know if there’s anything I can help you with.” Your hum was largely ignored by the man, and you held in the sigh threatening to bubble out.

Dealing with customers was so fucking annoying.

“Get out Dabi.” He stared at you, only putting his feet up on your stool and slyly grinning at your dismay. Rolling your eyes again, you swore your eyes would stay like that from having to put up with this guy for so long. Pushing past him, you settled yourself at your spot at the counter in front of him as the man came back to the counter with just a beer.

“Anything else I can help you find sir?”

“How about you give me your number?” Beady eyes stared you down, raking their way up and down your figure as if he’d just now noticed you talking to him— you didn’t bother to hide the frown on your face. “I’m sorry, I’m not interested.” It was a bad move, that much was clear, but giving him a fake number wouldn’t work— not as long as he knew where you worked. “The hell you’re not, I’ll ask one time. Give me your number.” It definitely wasn’t a question this time, it had been a threat. Your body tensed up at that, the man easily dwarfed you— hell, maybe his size was a part of his quirk.

Fear was starting to set in.

“Can’t you fucking hear? It’s a no.” A low snark sounded behind you, an arm shooting out in front of you before a lanky body pushed itself between you and the counter. Dabi’s typical slouch now gone, standing tall and staring down the man along the other side of the counter.

“Call off your fuckin’ guard dog babe.”

“I’m no fucking guard dog—”Blue blazed to life in Dabi’s hand, and a sadistic smirk pulled its way to his face. “—but if you get out the damn store, maybe I won’t burn you down to the fucking ground.” The giant of a man stared Dabi down, but the flame-wielder didn’t budge even though the man was easily the size of two of him.

The flame in Dabi’s hand flared brighter, making the man’s eyes narrow to your form that had still been obscured by Dabi. “This isn’t worth it.” He muttered, shaking his head as he stormed out of the convenience store— the flame subsiding after the man’s exit. Letting out a breath you didn’t quite know you were holding in as the man finally left, your posture slumped over. “I thought he’d never leave.” Dabi trudged back to the chair he’d been sitting in— a scowl plastering itself onto his face as he snatched the noodle cup back from the counter he’d left it on, easily replacing that self-assured smirk he had just before that man left. “What’s with you?” Brows furrowed as his chopsticks stabbed the at the cup, nearly poking a hole through the plastic.

Silence.

“Dabi, the hell’s wrong with you?” He’d never been like this before, not here with you at least— he’d always been so stand-offish and even kinda snarky— now it almost looked like he was pouting. “You don’t get to fuck around with anyone else.” He hissed lowly, a possessive glint in his eye. “Especially not with scumbags like that.” You blinked at that, he was just jealous? Dabi had never even bothered to show interest in you, and after all this time all it took was another man (albeit a very creepy and demanding one) to try to flirt with you.

Ignoring how your chest had clenched, you scoffed. “I do what I want Dabi, if I did want to date that man then I would. Unless there’s something you have to say, then you don’t have any say in that matter.” It was the right thing, right? If he said anything, and that was a big if, then maybe things would be different.

Grabbing the beer the man had left behind, you pushed past Dabi to go put it back in the coolers— until a hand gripped your wrist tightly. “Fine.” He stood back up, meeting your eye. “You’re mine.” This wasn’t a question either, but his silence waited for any objections— not that you would give him one. Biting your lip, you nodded slowly.

Smirking, he took the beer from your hand. “Good.” The tab clicked open as he pulled you to his side.

“You’re mine.”

Masterlist

[jazillia007]

Thoughts on GG 4x3 Fall Guy

Things I did not enjoy:

Phoebe...

I’m sorry but we really said goodbye to Turner for... Phoebe? I know some would root for her to turn on her shitty FBI co-worker but that wouldn’t make her interesting. It would look desperate. xD I don’t know. I wouldn’t mind her being on track when it comes to Beth. But the reasons why she suspects Beth fall flat to me.

But now things might turn and I’m also weirdly looking forward to what’s gonna happen since she found that letter Beth left. *sigh* Why didn’t Beth think of that?

Beth’s new bed

The only good thing it. got character but dang it it’s so ugly and I will never not notice. LMAO

Fitzpatrick Part 1

Being the creepy dude he is. Like... ewww... The fact he is like “oh but WHY do you not want to go with me to the Fijis?”. I mean it’s not like Beth’s husband is in prison right now and she got 4 kids to take care of but whatever. And she said “NO”. But hey... creepers gonna be creepy.

So but then, Beth tells him exactly that... and... continue in the what I liked section here...

Thing I would’ve enjoyed if done differently:

Did I need those flashbacks with Dean to understand why Beth is staying with him?

No, I don’t think I needed it to know why she is staying with Dean because Beth herself verbally said why she stays with him in many episodes. But I also think we need to remember the majority of the viewers are casual viewers who don’t watch the episodes like fandoms do and casual viewers sometimes need everything to get spelled out for them. But I also think casual viewers aren’t dumb and sometimes writers should just trust them to know and understand things and circumstances.

I also think I would’ve liked it more if the flashbacks had included Beth’s relationship with her father or the non-existence of the very same. I think the reason why women tend to stay with men who are not good for them is because: they have a dysfunctional family (problematic mother, problematic father or both combined), they’re dependent on men, those men resemble the father or the women want to fix something that was broken in their own family (e.g. not having a father but wanting a family and a father for their own children).

But we didn’t get that. And I think it’s a shame the writers focus a great deal on showing Dean was the only good guy Beth knew at that time hence why she chose him when it would’ve been more interesting to explore the reason WHY Beth thought Dean was the only seemingly decent person.

Also, just because Dean was a nice guy back then doesn’t make his cheating and lying okay. And it doesn’t mean Beth needs to stay with him. If anything it worries me that the writers apparently think “look because he was nice back and he basically “saved” Beth and gave her stability, she needs to stay with him forever”. That’s not the case. As I said before if the writers adore Matthew Lillard so much, they can keep him, even as the ex-husband. Just a thought.

However, I think the flashbacks were filmed nicely as some already mentioned. And I liked the casting.

Things I enjoyed:

Kenny

I know some people missed it but Kenny is away for a tournament which explains why it seems Beth and Dean only got 3 children. The show explained it right away, so thankfully Kenny won’t disappear like Buddy did. xD

Dean not buying Beth’s “I love you”

You know I don’t like Dean but I kind of enjoy he isn’t buying Beth’s “I love you” anymore. I mean he is the last person to call her out because he cheated on her and told her he loves her after she found out to manipulate her as well but I just like we see Dean not buying it. Because WHO is actually still buying it when Beth is telling Dean “I love you”.

Ruby and Annie having priorities

I love how they’re like “Hey, you got 4 kids!” like even to them Dean isn’t a father who deserves to be out of prison.

On a sidenote: Ruby aka Retta is looking extra gorgeous this season. Oh MY!

Whatever is going on with Stan

Look I always wanted for Stan and Rio to team up. So please let it happen. But also whatever happens in the club, “the little bitch” and the “big bitch” this could have potential.

But I hope he doesn’t develope a drinking problem and I don’t need the tension between him and Ruby. But also kind of enjoy he got now secrets of his own.

Found the whole mom situation in the flashbacks more interesting than Dean

I think you deleted the post @medievalraven but I think there might be something going on with Beth’s and Annie’s mom which is more related to (TRIGGER WARNING) depression and suicidal thoughts. Which is actually a whole lot more interesting to explore than what a nice guy Dean was back then.

And it would play into what I said earlier. That whatever is going on in Beth’s family made her the person she is now and would explain why she acts in certain ways and why she is unable to leave Dean (except the writers apparently don’t WANT her to leave Dean as of now).

And whatever has been going on at home explains why Annie turned out the way she was back then and still is - especially when it comes to Dean.

Annie and Ben

As you know, I barely relate with Annie but I always enjoyed the most her relationship with her son and if the writers are doing anything right it’s writing this arc properly. It’s normal for Ben to want to stay with his father but at the same time it breaks my heart for Annie.

Fitzpatrick Part 2

Beth going off was everything I needed right now. Thank you, Beth, for telling him where your limits are!

And what a douchebag is Fitzpatrick to be like “oh but I thought you wanted more from your life”. We love guilt-tripping men - NOT. Just look at Dean. I mean... c’mon! Also for him to be like “but you hired me”... Yeah, she did hire you but not sending the message “I also want sex with you.” What is this guy!?

However, I would buy Beth’s speech a little more if she would pair it up with actions. Like divorcing Dean and you know the drill. It would be so much more consistent than having her say one thing but not living up to it. I mean on the other hand now she is somewhat tied to him because Dean plead guilty but still... We’re going in circles a little bit.

Rio/Brio

You know I know the pool table scene is splitting the fandom as always. And I’m just grateful I can watch the scene and enjoy it as a shipper but also enjoy it as a viewer.

I liked the whole “negotiation” between Beth and Rio. Rio did a really low blow when he told Beth if Dean is released from prison 3 years later he might be in better shape and even wanting to “hit it again”. I think we all know why Dean and Beth aren’t working out anymore on a sexual basis and so does Rio, so while Rio might be correct it was a low blow.

But I also enjoy how Rio doesn’t care one bit about Dean. He never did - since season 1. And Dean being a shitty husband and a even shittier businessman is playing a huge part in it. And I like Rio doesn’t even pretend to care.

But he still gives into her pleading. I know some people think he is already over Beth shooting him and maybe that’s the case but in Rio’s case that doesn’t mean he can’t be petty by pulling away the stick. It’s like him saying “I gave you the gun once and I won’t do it again and this is me retaining control. You play this game and we see where it goes with the money.” He is challenging Beth and he knows she would take the challenge.

At the same time, and some of my mutuals noticed it as well, I got 2x9 bedroom vibes which is weird. Especially since there are many mutuals who didn’t feel it or read the scene differently or didn’t like it at all.

The way he looked at her after pulling away the stick. There is a lack of music which I don’t think was a conscious choice unlike it was in the bedroom scene in 2x9 but it still heightened the tension of the scene. And then there suddenly is music and it’s melancholic almost.

Then of course Rio “teaching” Beth how to play pool, handson. And this is where it gets interesting for me. I know a lot of people read this scene differently or it left a different impression.

For me: I always thought that both Beth and Rio are having very mixed feelings right now for eachother. Mostly confused anger. Anger for obvious reasons and confusion because that despite the anger they can’t stop whatever their relationship is and whatever their feelings might be.

And I think in season 3, Rio never really touched Beth. Except for when he showed up alive and did the hair thing and then when he put his hand over hers when she wanted a drink and he thought she was pregnant.

I think this... Rio leaning over Beth and then smelling her. A smell he knows too well and once probably loved. This is the first time he is this close to her again. And same for her, I think that little headshake was mostly her being a little startled but also becoming very aware of his closeness.

And it’s so interesting to see how Rio steps back and does this shoulder roll. It’s like he was suddenly aware of what he was doing and somewhat wanted to shake it off.

And just a little note: the ball had the number 8 on it which can be read as “forever” or “eternity”. Me reading too much into it. :P

Then the moment is over but I just love the moment of joy after Beth winning the challenge and for Rio as well. And then it quickly goes back to business. I think if they’re doing anything well it’s that Brio right now is very much split into two halfs. And for me of course I know the hitman plan is still going which is baffling to me. So of course this dampens any excitement I might have during Brio scenes.

Even though, we can safely say they won’t go through with the hitman plan, and especially now when Beth has hurt Fitzpatrick’s ego. He was pretty calm but I feel like he will mess up on purpose. I don’t think FItzpatrick takes rejection well. Just my thoughts on that. He was way too calm for someone who would hurt a person over raw salmon.

[shhhlikeme]

“Losty Aone” / “Losty Mountain Man🏔” Series:

Outtake Collection #6

———————————

A/N: 1 word, 5 letters: D R A M A

Pls peep the vote at the end! I know there are not very many of you who read this so I want to make it enjoyable for y’all 🥰 it’s sooo important to me that I write what makes me happy

OUTTAKE 5 WAS POSTED HOURS BEFORE THIS ONE SO CHECK IT !

‼️THIS IS THE 10TH PART IN A SERIES READ THE OTHER PARTS BEFORE THIS ONE: ‼️

TABLE OF CONTENTS

———————————

Hours After You Noticed Aone For The First Time And Had Lunch Together! 🤫🥩

With a very discreet bounce in his step, Aone Takanobu walked into the Date Tech boys volleyball team changeroom after exchanging numbers with you after school.

“AONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Upon entrance, the entire team jumped him, tackling him to the ground while shouting praise and acclamations of joy loudly!

Aone was actually grinning, shoving the boys off of him to pretend that he was annoyed.

But anyone could tell that this mountain man was on cloud 9!!!!

Futakuchi reached out his hand to help Aone up and the mountain man took it. They shared a look that only Aone knew meant his best friend was happy for him. Proud of him.

Actually, Kenji’s look was one of happiness and pride, yes, but it was also full of nerves for his friend’s potential heartbreak. But Aone was too overjoyed inside to pick up on that.

“So Y/N finally knows your name!” Koganegawa yelled as he jumped on Aone’s back.

Shrugging the big boned setter off, Aone blushed. He has never been happier in his entire life and it was kind of embarrassing that the whole team knew why that was.

“I’m very happy.” Aone nodded at his team who smiled brilliantly back at him. “But please, do not get your hopes up. I’m trying with everything in me not to get mine up, in case Y/N decides she doesn’t like me. She and I are just going to start talking for now. And for that I am grateful.” Stomach in knots, Aone bowed to his team in thanks for all the encouragement and praise.

“But Aone-senpai, Y/N asked you to lunch! We all watched you guys, she looked ecstatic talking to you and she even glared at these other girls in the hallway because they were checking you out!”

Aone’s heart dropped. “She did?”

Kenji smiled, patting him on the back. “Saw it with my own eyes too, big guy.”

Aone felt like he was so happy he could sing, but he knew how odd that would look coming from such a big and serious guy like himself.

“Oh. Well... that’s quite nice.”

What a turn of events! This morning, Aone was going through another day with a heavy heart because the love of his life would never like him back. Then, it only took him defending you against the class snitch for everything to change......

✏️ Earlier That Day ✏️

Aone was sitting in class like any other day, doing his work, listening to the teacher intermittently and your daily conversation with your friends. The teacher excused himself to run a club errand for 20 minutes, trusting the class to stay quiet and complete their homework. Like most typical high school classes, the volume raised as soon as the teacher stepped out. Aone glanced over at your talkative self for the 15th time that period and noticed how much you were glowing because your team had returned last night placing second at Regionals. You looked radiant, absolutely stunning with your brighter smile and louder angelic laugh.

In Mountain Man’s daydream, he imagined telling you that you looked beautiful today followed by a congratulations for placing second. You would rush over to him and kiss him in thanks then start ripping his clothes off so that you could—

“Y/N! I am sick and tired of you and the rest of the popular kids not listening to the teachers instructions! What part of ‘stay quiet’ is hard to understand in that pea brain of yours!?!??!”

To Aone’s left, sitting in his row, he looked for the yelling voice. It was who everyone (except Aone) called ‘the class snitch’ and school mascot: Tsume Lian.

Also known as Y/N’s arch nemesis.

Seating looks like:

Y/N glared at him.

“Tsume, no one was talking to you.”

“I know that, dork!” He fumed. “BECAUSE WE ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE TALKING! I’m trying to do my homework as asked, and you and the popular crowd just ignore everything the teacher says and it’s disgusting! I’m tired of it! I want you expelled!”

Aone noticed Y/N’s startled expression at the prospect of being expelled, because he knew from overhearing your conversations that your parents were this close to sending you to Seijoh to get your grades up and live on campus there. According to your gossip last week, if you failed another class or got another complaint from a teacher then your parents would under no circumstances allow you to cheer again.

Aone clenched his fists tightly around his pencil because he couldn’t stand the idea of seeing Motomu or Kindaichi drooling over you at his enemy school.

One of Y/N’s friends who Aone knew as Kusa, spoke up in defence of Y/N. “Oh shut it, Tsume. Us chatting isn’t bothering anyone else.”

“I don’t care! You cheerleaders think you can do anything you want and that’s that!! YOU WILL face repercussions if I can help it!”

Kusa feigned fear. She turned her entire body toward him in her seat, meaning business. A bitch had time today.

The entire class gave this drama all of their undivided attention when they witnessed that move, ready for the show like:

“Oh yeah?! And why are you just snapping about this now, huh? Why not before?” Kusa snapped. You put a hand on your friends arm, silently trying to tell her he isn’t worth her energy.

“Because I realized just how selfish, inconsiderate, and deplorable you good-looking, popular women are! You don’t deserve to be bowed down to like I thought! You should be treated like everybody else!”

“What are you talking about?” Y/N interjected. “No one treats us like that. Even if they did, we don’t ask them to nor do we ask to be popular and we especially don’t ask for special treatment, Lian. Why are you so mad??? Get your life.”

COLLECT HIMMMMMM 👏🏾👏🏾

Aone smirked to himself. In all his years of crushing on you he has never seen you look so fierce and he too put his pencil down to enjoy what was a different and fiery side of his crush. It made him want to fuck the shit out of you, you looked so sexy. Aone found he liked every side of you.

“I did have a life. I was a mascot and—“

“—And you were spending too much time looking up our SKIRTS instead of hyping up a CROWD, making the first years uncomfortable and borderline stalking Y/N so badly she asked that we terminate you! You are lucky she kept that to herself for so long! 🤬 And THAT’S why you’re mad!”

The class collectively gasped. Some whipped their phones out to snapchat the gossip. Aone widened his eyes in silence, since he was in between, he was looking back and forth at the fight like a tennis match.

Hahahaha 🎾 

Live footage of the classes reaction when Kusa READ TSUME FOR FILTH:

Tsume went red with anger, but anyone could tell that he was guilty guilty guilty !!!!

“When the teacher returns, I’m telling him and the principal the truth that you Y/N are a bully and you constantly disrupt the class! Who do you think they’re going to believe?! Their best student? Or their worst?! Say hi to AobaJohsai summer school for me!”

You frowned, scared out of your mind because Lian was right. The teacher’s believed everything he had to say and ever since you exposed him for sending you creepy messages and inappropriate pictures from a fake account that you knew was his, the class snitch has had it out for you. Even if the cheerleaders had your back, your parents would just think they are trying to protect you and never believe it! Tsume Lian was smart and dead set on planning your demise. It was unfair. You wanted to cry. Kusa whispered something to you in encouragement but you could feel the back of your eyes warming due to impending tears.

Meanwhile, with Mountain Man - Today was a day of firsts in his ‘Crushing on Y/N’ book. It was the first time he’s ever seen you glowing because of the Regional results, it was the first time he’s ever seen you so sassy, and now............. Aone notes that today is also the first time he’s ever seen you on the verge of tears before.

Unlike your glowing and your sassiness, Aone decided that he hated the last first more than anything in the world.

It consumed his emotions, how badly he didn’t want to see you cry.

“You really are slimy, Tsume. Wait until Katana hears this.” Kusa spat, rubbing her hand up and down Y/N’s back to soothe you as you willed your tears not to fall.

Seeing you so sad, Aone’s heart clenched.

He knew what it was like to be hurting but he never ever wanted that for you—not ever.

“Hey Y/N-chan, why don’t you show me that video your mom got of our reaction to us placing second yesterday?? I’d love to see it.” Kusa has accurately distracted you because she texted Katana what was happening and Katana knew just what to do until she got there.

You smiled, thinking about the overwhelming happiness from yesterday when your team placed second. You whipped out your phone and showed Kusa, smiling and giggling in a matter of seconds as it played.

Aone was glad you seemed good.

He turned to look at Tsume, who seemed to be raging inside. Shooting daggers at the two cheerleaders because they weren’t crumbling under his threats. They were laughing, in fact. Ignoring him as if he didn’t matter. Aone could tell Tsume was a ticking time bomb with how mad he was. His anger toward you looked severely unhealthy.

You let out a rather amusing laugh with Kusa as you two pointed to your screen and Aone’s heart skipped a beat because he loved that laugh so much. God, he is so fucking whipped.

When you laughed like that though, it sent perverted-snitch Tsume over the edge, bubbling over in anger like a piping hot kettle.

Aone watched him with studious eyes as Tsume took a deep breath to say something else that Aone was sure would stop your harmonious laughter that he adored......

“Y/N—“ Tsume started, but without warning, THE AONE TAKANOBU, DATE TECH MIDDLE BLOCKER, OUR MOUNTAIN MAN, interrupted him! Stopping all speech in the class with his simple, deep-voiced command:

“Leave her be. She’s having fun.”

The class:

The class went silent because they’d never really heard Aone’s voice before. :S

Still riled up, the class snitch took one look beside him (he was too distracted before) as to locate the voice. Once his eyes set on the verrrry muscular and verrrry mountainous man sitting between him and Y/N, he decided it would be smart to not be riled up anymore. A drop of sweat leaving his hairline, Lian scanned Aone’s gigantic body with his eyes, seeing that the volleyball player just barely fit in his desk—he gulped.

Aone had a relaxed expression, meaning to say what he said nonchalantly, but one needs to remember that Aone’s relaxed expression looks like this:

Needless to say, the ex-mascot almost pissed himself.

Is that Y/N’s b-b-boyfriend now? Tsume wondered to himself in panic as several more drops of sweat ran down his face.

“O-o-ok-o-o-oka-okay-y....” Tsume stuttered out as he turned back to his school work.

Five minutes later when the teacher came in, Tsume had nothing to say. He only had a sweat damped stack of homework to give him before he fled, not waiting for the bell of dismissal.

Did I frightened him? Aone thought.

He didn’t mean to. Sincerely. He was as gentle as giants come (except in bed if you rile him up enough or when someone is bothering you).

The class went back to normal and Aone continued working too.

But one person didn’t—no, couldn’t go back to normal:

You.

You sat in your seat still slack jawed because someone you didn’t know came to your rescue and quite possibly single handedly stopped your expulsion. How have you not noticed him before?! He is gorgeous!

Tall, muscular, handsome. Shiny white hair, beautiful lips. And he came to your defence.

In your opinion , he was a FINEASS mountain man! 🏔🤤

Yes ma’am!!!!

Anyway, while everyone was talking, working and minding their own business—including Aone—you slid out of your desk and bounced over to his happily.

“Hi! Thanks so much for defending me a little while ago!”

Bitch, this was you: ☺️😊😄

lost ass

Aone raised his head to look at you, jumping back slightly because he never even heard you approach. He stared up at you with a heart that stopped beating, absolutely speechless.

WHAT IS HAPPENING? He thought. YOU WERE TALKING................TO HIM? You were NOTICING..............HIM?!

😱😳🤯

You reached over to touch the handsome giant’s arm in his sweater, smiling at him endearingly.

“I’m Y/N! It’s nice to meet you!”

yeah you lost af, bitch 😐

Aone wanted to say something, he did. But he was just too shocked that the girl he thinks about nonstop, the girl he wishes was his, the girl he just had a wet dream about last night, was talking to him and only him for the first time.

Unexpectedly!

Takanobu always thought you two would first speak because of Futakuchi or the teacher but not because of him.

Aone couldn’t fathom the fact that HE made this happen! HE was the reason you were over here!

Aone: 🤯🤯🤯

It was ALL. TOO. MUCH.

He couldn’t speak.

You removed your hand from his arm, silently chastising yourself because you shouldn’t touch people without permission.

Not that Aone minded. That boy would want you to touch him anywhere, on anyday, at anytime that pleased you.

“Sorry.” You looked down shyly, then met his serious expression again, wanting to be sure he knew how grateful you were for his help.

“Um.... you probably don’t know this but you getting that pervert to leave me alone is quite possibly the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. And you did it for a stranger like me, no less.”

A/N: RUB IT IN THAT YOU DONT KNOW THE MAN MORE, WHY DONT YOU ?! 🤬

You tucked your hair behind you ear while holding his gaze. Aone could only nod because his throat was dry. You looked so incredibly perfect up-close and he wanted to make sure he remembered this. He just couldn’t speak.

Feeling a little awkward now because you just tried starting a conversation with this FINEASS classmate of yours to only get a nod in return, you laughed timidly.

“Okay, well I guess I’ll...” you turned on your heels so you could make your way back to your desk with your L. “....see you later.” You finished, telling him over your shoulder.

Much like when he defended you against Tsume, Aone didn’t know what came over him then: maybe it was all the memories of him feeling heartbroken that you’d never notice him or return his feelings—maybe it was the promise he made that he would do something toward pursuing you if you would just notice him first—or maybe is was because his best friend Kenji would have his HEAD if Aone told him he let you walk away right now without trying....... after TWO YEARS.........that compelled him to respond to your “see you later” bravely, FINALLY UTTERING WORDS TO YOU FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS ENTIRE LIFE:

“When?”

^Asked Aone, just as you were walking away from him.

You stilled, feeling excitement in your body because he answered. You spun around and jumped back in front of his desk. You gave him a questioning look.

You responded, “When, what?”

Even though he was melting under your attention, Aone couldn’t give up now. He had to shoot his shot. This may be his only chance.

“When is later?” He elaborated.

Huh? You thought.

You blinked at the stunning classmate. What is he—OH, does he mean.....

“As in...when will I see you again?”

Aone nodded at you, holding his breath.

You massaged your chin, thinking 🤔.

You can admit you wanted to know more about this gorgeous man who came to your rescue. There was something about him that made you feel safe and warm. You couldn’t quite place it. You’ve never wanted to spend time with anyone outside of cheerleading more than this guy—so you owed it to yourself to explore that small feeling, right?

“Okay. Well, how about now? Lunch is after this period. Would you want to have it with me?!” You asked cheerily.

Though he didn’t show it, inside, fireworks went off in Aone’s mind, heart, and stomach...!

Actual footage:

Aone nodded quickly. Way too quickly for someone who did not want to come across as the most eager beaver in the world.

But he was...... and you noticed. It made you smile.

“Okay. So when the bell rings you can walk me to my locker and I’ll put away my stuff, then we’ll go to yours....then we can go head to lunch together. Sound good?”

Aone nodded quickly again!

You gave him the big smile that made him become a simp for you in the first place and you took your seat again.

Takanobu was so excited he literally almost stood up to spin the hand clock that hung up beside the door himself so that time could go by faster. He couldn’t even move to text Kenji because he knew his hands would shake.

He just sat there, his mind whirling mad until the bell finally rang. You said bye to Kusa and watched as this blonde hottie stood up from his seat, towering over you.

God, he was so freaking HOT! You wanted to jump him.

At the same time students filed out of the class, Aone turned to you as he collected his things then slung his bag over his shoulder.

“May I carry your books for you, Y/N?” Mountain man asked sheepishly in his stern voice.

Your heart fluttered by how cute and sweet he was to ask!

“Umm, sure! Thank you so much!” You smiled and handed your heavy books over.

You two walked beside eachother and Aone held the door open for you. You didn’t know why he was being so nice but you couldn’t lie that you felt very charmed.

“Y/N.”

You looked up at the handsome giant with curious eyes after he called your name.

“My name is Aone Takanobu by the way. You introduced yourself before, but I did not answer. I’m sorry. Either way, I knew who you were already. It’s very nice to meet you.”

Your smiled widened as you bounced on your feet while walking. “Very nice to meet you too, Aone Takanobu. I’ve actually heard of you before.”

Aone’s eyes lit up like 👀

“Wait r-really?”

Omg precious bby 🥺🥺🥺

“Yes. At a cheerleading sleepover. All good things, don’t worry. It’s just funny because I said that night how hopefully I’ll meet you and now here we are!”

Aone chuckled as he held open another door for you. When he did and you two walked down another hall, he caught sight of two very conspicuous volleyball players (one looked eerily like Justin Bieber, the other looked big boned) hugging eachother and slumping down to the ground at the sight of you and Aone. Aone rolled his eyes, thinking that they were lucky you never noticed your surroundings.

“Here we are.” Aone repeated, shooting a secret thumbs up at his friends who were on the verge of crying.

***

Nearing the end of an enjoyable lunch for both of you where you spoke a lot and Aone listened with heart eyes: he pulled your chair out for you, he was responding, he was chuckling, and overall hanging onto your every word, never wanting your time together to end. You became rather smitten.

***

“The bell is gonna ring soon, Aone. I just want to thank you again for buying my lunch and spending this time with me! I know it was super random!”

Aone got lost in your eyes as you said his name, because he’s never taken a moment to analyze how nice it could sound if it was caressed by your voice. Also, he’s never heard his name said by someone so beautiful (when it wasn’t being said in a question). He was BATHING in joy.

Although Aone didn’t answer and he’s maintained his stoic expression the entire lunch, deep down you felt that this man had a thing for you. He was very intense so it was quite obvious. But since you enjoyed the lunch so much and you were starting to have a thing for him, too, you wanted to confirm:

“Also, Aone-san, I’m happy to know that you can say more than 4 words 😲! I asked my friend earlier and she said you basically never speak.” You exclaimed, fishing.

Aone smirked, feeling the need to defend himself on that front. “It is true that that is the consensus of the majority of people who come in contact with me. However, that is because there exists few people, that I feel inclined to speak to.”

Hook, line, and sinker. Your eyes twinkled at his words. He looked like a jock but sounded so eloquent! You loved it:

“Oh wow well you spoke a lot to me today so I guess I must be a little special then, huh.......?” You twirled your hair around your index finger as you asked, causing Aone to almost drool.

listen, you...kind of..... wanted mountain man.

And you were only flirting minimally okay.....minimally, so don’t judge

You just wanted to know if your suspicions were right that he had a little crush on you or if he saw you as a friend

Aone looked down at you, thinking of a way to respond to you asking if you were special to him.

A/N: 😣🤞🏾AONE DONT CREEPY 😣🤞🏾DONT BE CREEPY 😣🤞🏾DON’T BE CREEPY 😣🤞🏾

“This is our first time speaking. So I am not entirely sure if you’re special yet...” He started.

You quirked your eyebrow attractively, anticipating how he would end that sentence.

“...But I hope that even after this lunch ends I can take you out again a few more times, Y/N-chan—somewhere nice and off-campus, perhaps—so that I can truly decipher whether you are or not.”

You quirked your eyebrow even higher, impressed by the smooth way he told you he wants to keep seeing you!

WELL SIS HES ONLY HAD 2 YEARS OF PRACTICE I MEAN—

“I’d love to.” You accepted, making Aone smile.

He was absolutely stunning when he smiled, it was almost unfair.

The bell rang.

“Mind walking me back to my locker, Aone?”

Aone stood on internally shaky legs that he willed to be normal. “Of course.” He took both yours and his tray and dumped it out before escorting you out of the cafeteria.

✏️ Back in the Locker Room ✏️

“We are happy for you, Aone.” Kenji patted his large friend on the back.

“I had your voice in the back of my mind, Kenji-san. I owe this happiness to you and your support. I know you’re worried that I’ll get my heart broken and be crushed but I’m thankful for you supporting me anyway. You will forever be my brother.”

———————————

Taglist: @crushzone @galagcica

Outtake #7: CLICK HERE

THE VOTE! ☑️

Upcoming outtakes (NSFW):

Losty Aone answering Kenji’s call while you’re having sex. He told you to please wait but...um....no. Hang up, buddy 😈

When you tease poor Losty Aone during class and make him want to f*ck you hard

You telling Aone that you’re horny before his game knowing you’d be cheering next to him the whole time being suggestive

Sending Aone a nude for the first time

First Kiss (In which Aone gets his first urge)

Discovering Aone’s ear kissing kink

Upcoming Fluff outtakes:

Aone on your first birthday as a couple

The official confession

Aone Embarrassingly telling Y/N about the things he did when he was crushing on you :/ (cupcake, donation, wet dreams, hoping to be your tutor, etc!)

When Aone fills in at one of your cheer practices!

Aone having to save you from your annoying admirers

Send me an ask/message/comment below with the number(s) of the outtake you really want me to write and the ones with votes will be done

Say “Losty Aone Story nsfw number ___” or “Losty Aone Story fluff number ___”

[flying-nightwing]

Decorum (2/3)

Part 1 > Part 3 

Pairing: Dick Grayson x reader (ish), Jason Todd x reader

Word count: 4010

Warnings: same as part 1 + violence

Summary: When it all went down, your knight in shiny armour was the last person you wanted to see.

It was the first sun rays peeking through the lazily closed blinds that woke Dick up from his sleep. Barbara wasn’t there, but he still smiled. She had to work early, but she still allowed him to spend the night with her despite how tired she’d be in the morning. If only he didn’t have to hide her, if only she could replace… 

He rolled his eyes. His wife--it left a not so good taste in his mouth when he said the word--had tried to call him when he was with Barbs, almost ruining the mood. Almost. He had just turned off his phone after the third call, certain that whichever matter she called to complain about could wait to the morning. With sleep still in his eyes, he reached for his phone and turned it on, knowing he’d have to face her wrath for ignoring her calls eventually. But what he definitely wasn’t prepared for was the sheer amount of notifications on his lock screen. He blinked awake and took it all in.

13 missed calls and 4 new voicemails from: wife

2 missed calls and 2 voicemails from: Todd

His eyebrows knit together as he listened to Jason’s messages first. All of this was… Unusual.

“Grayson. You’re such an asshole you know that? Take your fucking responsibilities for once”

Dick rolled his eyes. Did Jason call him just to say that? Well, he wouldn’t be surprised. He skipped to the next message.

“You let your fucking wife get back home by foot for some pussy, and now she doesn’t call me back. She should have been home by now but I can’t reach her. Fix this”

Hold on, hold on. You went there by car, not by foot. And you called Jason? His growing confusion compelled him to quickly switch to your messages as unease settled in his guts. You usually never called, especially not his brothers. And never 13 times either.

“Dick, uh, it’s me. My car has broken down on the road 49, about twenty minutes drive from the mansion. I tried a taxi but I’m literally in the middle of nowhere. Could you pick me up? … Call me when you get this”

Uh. He pressed the next one.

“Dick. It’s me again. Don’t bother coming, I’m walking home. Hope you have fun tonight”

There was your snark. He rolled his eyes, figuring you were just too pissed at him to call back Jason. But still, he pressed next message.

“Dick, I think I’m being followed. Please call me if you get this”

This one didn’t sound like you. Well, it was your voice, but he had never heard it like this before. It was nervous, even terrified. You did not do emotional vulnerability, not ever, so something must have felt wrong. But he told himself you had just been paranoid, and that you were safe and sound home. With hesitation, he went to your last voicemail.

“Someone’s behind me. They’re gaining on me and--”

It was followed by a thud, then silence. His ears were ringing as he hurried to dial your number, it must have been a prank to get back to him. Yes, you wanted to scare him to get back at him, nothing more. But you didn’t answer. Not on the first call, not on any call. 

He jumped out of bed and hurried to dress, not bothering if he looked like a mess. At this moment he assumed the worst, and a gut feeling told him he was right.

---------

You woke up with pain in your wrist and your neck, and a blurry vision that didn’t allow you to see exactly where you were just yet. But as the previous night events came back to you, you understood that wherever you were, it wasn’t home, and you were in danger. A man was sitting in front of you, observing you. He had graying hair and an eyepatch, but what stood out was the blade in his hands, casually resting on his thigh. No, this can’t be happening. 

“Good morning miss Grayson”

You felt tears prick your eyes as you tried to look anywhere but at him. “If it’s money you want, I’ll give it to you, I swear--”

“No, no” He interrupted you softly. “I have enough money, I don’t care about yours or your husband’s for that matter”

You frowned in confusion. Beside your money, you didn’t do anything to piss off anyone. “Then why am I here?”

He took a moment, observing you curiously. He leaned on his chair and stroked his beard. “I want to talk to you about your husband” He began. “Him and I have unfinished business”

Your heart sank at his words. Not only Dick made your life miserable every single day of your life, but now he would get you killed. You didn’t want to die, not like this, not because of Dick. You felt the tears run down your cheeks as he grabbed a folder on the table beside him and drew out a picture. He held it in front of your face, forcing you to look at it. It was taken through a window, in a less than ideal angle, but the image was clear enough to know exactly what was going on.

Dick, shirtless with Barbara on his laps kissing like there was no tomorrow. 

You didn’t flinch, you only looked away. The man observed you some more before he clicked his tongue, lowering the picture and putting it away.

“You knew already”

“Yeah well” You spat in half shame, half anger, avoiding looking at him. You knew of it, it still didn't make it hurt any less to see the visual proof of him actively choosing someone else. More tears, only tears, to blur away the mental image. You shook your head and sniffed. “You’ve got the wrong person if you’re trying to hurt him. He doesn’t love me, never did and never will”

Once again, he decided not to answer just yet but to keep staring at you. It was creepy, it seemed like he was trying to read right through you. There was a fascination in his eyes, like he couldn't quite get your character, but he was working on it. He tilted his head to the side and hummed.

“But you wish he did” He spoke in wonder. “Don't you?”

You gritted your teeth at his affirmation, one you had refused to admit to yourself for so long. God, had you wished you would be the one he smiled to. He was attractive, and the smile he reserved for those around you--but never you--made you wish you could make him happy. You had tried so hard to be pleasant, to be someone he could settle with despite the circumstances, Lord knows you did. You knew he was funny from his lively conversations with Tim and Damian you overheard, and loving from his complete devotion to Barbara. But all he had ever shown you was coldness and disappointment, and the feeling that you would never be enough. Your kidnapper was right and you hated it.

“Just… Get it over with” You mumbled, knowing you were no use anymore to him now that the truth was out. “He won't come for me. Better not waste your time on someone that doesn't matter to him”

“I don't know if this is ironically funny or just sad��� He sighed, standing up from his chair and walking to a small table some feet away. “Almost makes me feel sorry for what's to come”

He came back toward you with a sharp looking blade, and that's when you started to truly panic. You thought downplaying it would make it let you go, but he was determined to hurt him through you. And this time, it would get physical.

“Since blackmail didn't work, let's try something else that might”

------

Jason sat on the counter, staring at Dick pace around in the kitchen. His legs were dangling, itching to kick him every time he passed in front of him. But he didn't, not yet anyway. It was the most he's ever seen his half brother concerned for his wife. Actually, it was the first time he's seen him concerned for her at all. That was new, and Jason was doubting his motive. 

"It's probably Slade" Dick finally spoke. "No ransom note, silence radio. It must be him"

"Duh" He rolled his eyes, and Dick glared at his nonchalance.

"My wife's been kidnapped" He deadpanned. "Aren't you going to help?"

"Tell me" Jason jumped off the counter, ignoring the question. He went and grabbed the orange juice and took a sip. "How many times did you wish, and I quote, to get rid of her for good?" 

"It's not the time to be smug" Dick grunted, knowing very well he was at fault there. He had ignored his wife in time of need to, as Jason so eloquently put it in his voicemail, get some pussy. "We need to find her"

"We?" He raised an eyebrow. Dick had called him in a frenzy earlier, and he had came back as soon as he could to Gotham. But it was not for his brother that he did, far from it. "I think you misunderstood. I'm here to guilt trip you until you fix your mess, then provide her moral support while you go fuck yourself"

Dick stopped in front of Jason and squared up at the challenge hanging on his words. Despite Jason being slightly taller, he didn't back down. Finally, he stomped away, leaving his brother to take a long sip of the carton in his hands. 

"I hope Barbs was worth it!"

"Fuck you!"

--------

"One cut on her pretty face for each hour you don't show up"

The words on the video he sent your husband keep replaying in your head, over and over again as it was the only thing you could even think about. The burning of his blade was still very much present on your skin where he had made the first cut, it wasn't too deep but enough to make it bleed down your cheek. The salt of your tears created a displeasing tingle where the skin had been severed, and at that moment you were convinced you would die here, disfigured by a maniac who had against your husband. You were tired, in pain and all you wanted was to be back home, alone in your little universe. 

You pictured your favourite book of the moment on the table, the one right under the windows that would let the sun in. You'd have a coffee and a bowl of cherries, and you would spend afternoons reading to get your mind off everything. The story would more often than not be about this woman and a brooding, charming love interest learning to love each other through adversity. They would always end up together, happy forever after. 

Oh, did you wish to be them. 

But you never could. You never could because Dick never would. He was stubborn, he didn't care for you. In his eyes, you were the woman who ruined his life and nothing more. He had been with another woman for the entire duration of your marriage, and his affair had lead you to be kidnapped. His carelessness lead you here, and he probably didn't even want to come for you. You'd only be finally out of his way, and Gotham would only make him a martyr out of it. Two birds one stone, as they say. 

"Two hours, miss Grayson" 

You tried to wriggle out of your restraints as your kidnapper stalked toward you with the same blade he had made the first cut. But it was pointless, you weren't strong enough to fight him. So you were left to scream as the sharp metal pierced your skin just above the last mark. 

And that's when glass shattered all around you. The blade paused in your skin for a second before leaving it, before the man let go of you completely. A blur of black and blue passed in front of your eyes and jumped on the one eyed man, attacking him in a way you could only assume as brutal. While you were trying to make sense of what was happening in front of your eyes, someone else crouch at your side. You were about to scream, but you felt the restraints on your wrist being cut free, then on the other side as well.

The first thing you saw when you dared to look beside you was a leather jacket, a familiar one. Without thinking twice, you threw your arms around Jason, holding tight. 

"Come on darling, we need to get out of here" He muttered, helping you up on your feet. 

"Wait-- We gotta…" You tried to turn around, but Jason wouldn't let you. "He has…"

"Grayson will be fine" He scoffed as you felt your head spin. The sudden movement made you dizzy, and you felt yourself falling unconscious. "Oh shit"

The last thing you saw before blacking out was Jason hurrying to catching you before you hit the floor.

------

Dick had driven you to the hospital. He hadn't accounted on Jason showing up, and he was surprised he hadn't taken the matter in his own hands and drove you here himself. But Jason understood it would raise less questions if an actual detective brought you back, especially since the whole city had been made aware of your kidnapping. So he left the honors to Dick, knowing there would be plenty other occasions to turn the knife in the wound. 

You were still unconscious, but the doctors had said you would make a full recovery. You were just really dehydrated, and probably in shock after the events. Dick was sitting at your side, rehearsing in his head his apology to you. He didn't know where to begin, he hadn't expected to feel remorses at all. He didn't even know why he cared about getting you back; at first, he thought it was for the same reason he became Nightwing, or even Robin in the first place. Because he had to help you. Because he wouldn't Slade walk all over him. The feeling was supposed to go away once he got you to safety, it was supposed to be gone by now. But staring at your unconscious form now, it only grew worse. He had done his job, so why was he staying by your side? Why was he feeling so bad about it? 

It made him think about that one time you helped him clean his wounds. It had been a tough night with the guys, and he hadn't had the energy to fight with you. He was bruised and battered, and you had walked on him trying to disinfect a cut on his back. You hadn't said a word as you had gently grabbed the swab in his hands, and had done all the work for him. You had never asked questions about Nightwing, nor had you ever told his secret. Why didn't you? Why had you tried so hard to be nice to him when he was a jerk? Why couldn't you be a jerk too and make it easier?

He remember the look in your eyes a few nights ago when you had snapped. It was like everything holding you back had disappeared, like he had pushed you over the edge. He had been trying to do that for so long, but it hadn't felt as good as he had hoped. He had felt bad, even. He knew your public image was literally all that you had left, and he was trying to sabotage it as well. He realized now how horrible he had been. Why did he do that? Why? How had he been so afraid of exploring outside the safe zone Barbs provided him, that it made him actively ruin someone else's life?

He glanced at you and took a deep breath. He would make it right this time. He wanted to make it right--

"Howdy, Dick in Chief" 

His head snapped toward the door, where Jason stood with that look on his face, letting him know he was in for some shit eating. Dick rolled his eyes and sat back in the chair facing you. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

“Well, isn’t it obvious?” Jason shrugged, taking this as an invitation to come in. Not that he needed one, he would have came in no matter his answer. “I’m here for her. I doubt you’re the face she wants to see when she wakes up. Mine’s better anyway”

Dick sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “Why do you even care?” He asked. “Last time I checked you didn’t like her any more than I did”

“You should check more often then” He hummed, stopping at the foot of the bed and sending you a glance. “I thought she was only one of your stuck up fan girl, but turns out she’s actually nice. And that ass…”

Dick glared at him, and he held up his hands in surrender.  

“Why do YOU care?” He turned the question around. “It’s past ten. Shouldn't you be inches deep in Barbs right now anyway?”

“Fuck you Todd!”

“All I’m saying is that you missed your chance, Dick Supreme” He leaned on a rolling pole, then stumbled back upright when his weight pushed it back. He looked behind him at it, then shook his head and returned his attention on his brother. “She got kidnapped because you were out fucking your girlfriend instead of landing a helping hand for once. There’s no coming back from that, so why don’t you take the night off and let Jay Bird handle it uh?”

Dick stood up wordlessly and stomped out of the room, sending you one last glance before disappearing behind the door frame. Jason watched him go, waited a few seconds more and sighed. “How long have you been awake?”

Slowly, you opened your eyes and nodded a silent thank to Jason not to have revealed that you were listening. Dick couldn’t even notice you had woken up, but it didn’t surprise you. You couldn’t bring yourself to care about it. “About 20 minutes, I don’t know”

Jason plopped in the seat beside your bed previously occupied by his brother and smiled at you. “Was I right?”

You nodded again. The last person you wanted to see right now was Dick.

“Thanks for saying I’m nice” You chuckle came out rasped, but it was still light. “And whatever about my ass… I guess”

“Only the truth for you” He winked, and your chest shook in silent laughter. He sat back in satisfaction, with that little grin on his face. Always the best at making you feel better. “You know what, you should have married me instead of golden dick”

“Oh?” You raised an eyebrow in amusement. You knew the whole city would have exploded if it had been him instead of Dick two years ago--he knew it as well--but you wanted to see what joke he would spin out of this shameless flirting.

“Hm mmh” He leaned forward toward you. “I mean, faithfulness wouldn’t have been guaranteed, I guess that’s a given in both scenario, but at least, I would have made it fun”

You couldn’t help but laugh, even though it stung the bandaids on the side of your face. Leave it to Jason to make light of the disaster that was your marriage to Dick Grayson. 

“Why are you laughing? It’s true” At this point, he was laughing too. You hadn’t seen him laugh before, but it was a nice change of pace for once. “There’s a line up for this piece of heaven, but I swear it would have been all yours first”

“Jesus” You dropped your hand on your belly as you caught back your breath. 

“Jason, darling, not Jesus” He corrected. “But hey, I’m flattered you confuse me with the saviour of humanity”

“You dork” You lightly punched his shoulder, and he pretended to recoil like he was actually hurt. “How did I--”

You stopped talking as your eyes caught the TV broadcast in the background. The sound was muted but they were talking about you, your picture and name in bold letter on the screen. Reluctantly, you turned on the sound, ignoring Jason’s weak protests. The smiles and laughter had dropped, and you knew by his now silence that you wouldn’t like what they would show next. Your heart dropped, hoping it wasn’t what you thought it was, but knowing better.

“... The kidnapping of the Gotham socialite wasn’t the only scandal linked to the Wayne family in this tragedy. Anonymous source delivered incriminating pictures of Mr Grayson having an affair with a woman whose face was blurred by whoever took them, which begs the question, was miss Grayson’s disappearance about jealousy, or as a payback for--”

Jason finally had enough and grabbed the remote from your hands, turning off the TV. The one secret you had fought so hard to keep buried had came to the light, just like that. You looked down and sighed, knowing you were done for. Reporters, other high people of Gotham, anyone, would see you as the wife who got cheated on. The wife that couldn’t be enough. And the worst, all the blame would fall again on you, and you only.

“I guess this is what you were trying to tell me back there” Jason rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m sorry, darling”

“Not your fault” You mumbled after swallowing the lump in your throat. You couldn’t stay in Gotham anymore. You needed to get out as soon as possible, before--

Someone clearing their throat made you and jason turn toward the door frame, where Dick had a guilty expression on. You guessed he had witnessed the broadcast, but couldn’t see why he seemed to feel so bad about it. Wasn’t it what he had tried to do since day one?

“Can… Could I talk to you?” 

You broke eye contact with your husband to nod at Jason, telling him to leave you two for a moment. Turns out, you needed to talk to him to, briefly. Jason nodded back and stood up before leaving the room, but not before bumping into Dick on his way out. Your husband carefully made his way to the chair and took his place back by your side.

“I wanted to say that I’m sorry, for everything. For treating you like shit, for sabotaging you, for hurting you and for getting you in the crossfire of my mistakes” He dove right in, but you weren’t impressed. You crossed your arms against your chest and looked down. “I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I’m still asking for it, if you can give it. If not, I won’t hold it against you”

You took a deep breath, and hope filled his eyes. But then, it dropped as soon as it came when you shook your head. “I’m not sure if I could, not now, maybe not ever”

He swallowed.

“I’m going away, I… I need some time” You nodded to yourself. “I need to be out of Gotham and think about myself for a bit”

“Yes, I understand, whatever you need” His voice sounded too hopeful for the truth you knew inside. A pause settled as you debated telling him you didn’t plan on coming back, ever, but he spoke before you could decide. “... Do you think there could be ever a chance for me to make it up to you?

You couldn’t meet his eyes, and you didn’t have the heart to break him like he did to you. You just wanted out as soon as possible, as far as possible from him. He didn’t need you, he just felt bad and you couldn’t go through the same song all over again.

“I don’t know, Dick. I don’t know”

[scripttorture]

Okay so, mental conditioning does not work? But how do I work around this or fix it when writing Star Wars fics? Clearly it stopped working for Finn, but is that even done well? How about everyone else? I do want to write about more such characters who either defected or were released after the war ended. Thanks.

With the caveat that I never managed to watch the most recent Star Wars film, I think Finn was handled well.

 The issue here is partly one of terminology. Which is OK, believe me I know how confusing the terminology in this subject area is. Everyone uses their own terms and half the time they change their minds about which terms they want to use. It’s a mess.

 When I say that ‘brain washing doesn’t work’ I don’t mean that there’s no way for villains to manipulate vulnerable people or that there’s no way for a villain to get someone to change their mind.

 I’m talking about a set of tropes that are commonly used in fiction. The storyline where a character who we know would rather die then help the villain vanishes for a while and then returns as a completely different person devoted to the villain. Or the storyline where a character changes their beliefs to exactly what the villain wants because the villain tortured them.

 Or any other storyline where physical abuse and nothing else leads to the abuser having a massive amount of control over what the victim thinks and feels.

 Violence isn’t persuasive.

 And there’s plenty of evidence to show that given the choice between dying and going against a strongly held belief a lot of people will choose to die.

 But people who are enslaved, people in prison camps and child soldiers often do comply with their captors, to a certain extent.

 Based on what I’ve read I think that the reason this happens isn’t primarily about violence. I don’t think victims are ‘beaten into submission’.

 Instead the overwhelming impression I get is that victims make hard-headed, difficult decisions based on the circumstances they’re in.

 Let’s take an example from abusive relationships. Leaving or attempting to leave an abusive relationship is associated with a higher risk of being murdered by the abuser.

 Victims don’t need to have read any studies or be aware of the research to feel that leaving would put them at a greater risk. They mostly already know that they’re likely to lose their home, job and access to income if they leave. And practical considerations like this ‘How would I survive immediately afterwards? Where would I sleep? What would I eat?’, these can stop people leaving.

 I think Finn was handled well because the script and the actor showed a character who didn’t know or understand the world outside of the First Order. It suggested someone who had been controlled.

 Someone who had had a life time of being told that the First Order was the only place that would ever accept him, take care of him, want him.

 When that’s all a child hears growing up they often believe it. Hell adults can start believing this stuff, especially when they’re cut off from other social groups, the message is repeated and they don’t have access to anyone telling them anything different.

 We underestimate the effect social pressure has on us. We’re social animals and we need social interaction to function.

 So when a group that’s the only source of social interaction for someone makes a demand it is very very hard for people to say ‘no’. Not because they can’t but because the loss of that group (even without considering things like the loss of housing, income, a source of food) is a big deal.

 And on the balance an awful lot of people will choose to go along with that abusive group rather then risk losing ‘everything’.

 Remember that Finn’s backstory is that he was taken as a baby. That abusive organisation was literally all he’d ever known.

 And, in something that’s actually really realistic, he chooses to leave because what the organisation wants goes against his own strongly held beliefs. Finn decides that he’s reached the point where he’d rather risk dying or a lifetime alone in an uncaring universe, then spend another second obeying the people who’d sacrifice his brothers and sisters in a heartbeat.

 That’s damned powerful stuff.

 But notice the differences between what we’re talking about here. Finn’s story, for all that it still has flaws, is led by him and his decisions.

 On a basic level, hitting someone won’t make them change their mind.

 It might make them comply with some simple tasks for a little while. Most people will choose to break rocks instead of take a beating, especially if it might buy them time to look for a better way out of their situation.

 But more long term obedience is usually undermined by violence.

 That’s actually one of the things I love about Finn’s story; he defects right after his first real exposure to war. He sees the people he grew up with die around him and you see how much it effects him.

 Hopefully that makes things a little clearer, I’m going to wrap it up here with a few more things that you might find helpful/interesting.

 There’s an ask here where I talk about ICURE, a set of techniques that are often used by abusive organisations to manipulate people and try to change their minds. There’s another, older ask here where someone asked me how I’d write this sort of scenario, it might give you more of an idea of how to show this sort of manipulation as coercive and creepy without taking away the targetted character’s agency. I’ve got a list of books and articles on child soldiers here.

 All of this might sound like a lot and there is a lot of nuance here but at it’s heart it boils down to this: give your characters a reason of their own for acting the way they do. Their decision. Their choice. It does not have to be a good choice. It does not have to be a free choice. But if it is theirs and the reader can understand why they’ve chosen it, you’re more then half way there.

 I hope that helps. :)

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[toho-literature]

Curiosities of Lotus Asia - Chapter 12

Chapter 12: The Deities’ Tool

The Deities’ Tool

“This thing... What were the people in the outside world thinking when they made it?”

I still remember feeling chills when I put it away on a shelf deep inside the store.

Let’s put it like this: I am Rinnosuke Morichika, a merchant through and through. And this is my antique store, “Kourindou” where I keep all sorts of items, most of them curiosities. I gather these items from the outside world to sell them, and I always keep my door open to customers.

But then, there are those that are not customers but still come here and treat me like I am a fake merchant. “It’s not like you’re really interested in selling any of these things, right?”, they say. And I am indeed not interested in selling anything to non-customers.

There are, in fact, a few items kept deep inside the store that I’m not interested in selling. Some items are not for sale because I am personally interested in them. It’s true that some of these are bothersome things that would only take up space in the shop. However, I consider all of them to have value, but more so than my common wares. It just so happens that no one willing to pay a price corresponding to their worth has appeared.

But among them there is an item that’s lately been bothering me terribly. And it’s worse than usual, because I can’t really ask anyone’s advice regarding this item. It’s a grey box, small enough to be held in the hands, made of... plastic, I believe it was called? As I was saying, it’s a box made from a material neither metal nor stone. Items made of this material have been extremely numerous lately. On top of that, this one has several differently-shaped buttons and switches on it. However, even if I push them, nothing happens.

Insofar there’s nothing particularly ominous about it. However, this item’s “utility” is very unsettling. Yes, my ability permits me to “determine an item’s utility”. That’s why I am the only one that gets this uneasy feeling. And it’s this feeling that prevents me from selling this item.

Knock, knock.

“It’s freezin’ out there, Kourin! And it’s even worse in the forest.”

“Is that you, Marisa? If you are coming in, wipe the snow from yourself before you do.”

“Yeah, I’m doin’ that now.”

I put the ominous little box deep inside a shelf to hide it, and went over to the entrance.

“It’s too late to start now. Aren’t you already inside the store?”

“I’m not even a customer, so it’s not that bad, right?”

“No, it’s doubly bad. I’d like to know what you are going to do if you get my merchandise wet.”

“Butcha aren’t going to sell any of it, are ya? The whole shop is full of nothing but stuff that isn’t for sale. It doesn’t look like ya want to part with any of it.”

“Even if it’s not for sale, it’ll be bad if it gets wet. Anyway, hurry up and go wipe yourself outside.”

Marisa reluctantly went outside. There was a lot of snow piled up on her hat. Was it really snowing that much...? Since I haven’t been outside at all, I didn’t even notice that it was snowing.

That’s fine, though. During the harsh winter, I can wait for it to end staying close to my heater – a result of human ingenuity.

“I’m back. It’s cold outside, but the sun came out so it’s real pretty.”

“It stopped snowing, then?”

“Huh? ’Twasn’t even snowin’ to begin with.”

“What about the snow piled up on your hat?”

“Ah, it landed on me when I went under some tree in the forest. I wonder if it was some fairy’s idea of a prank. Makin’ the tree shake when someone walks under it so the snow falls on ’im. My head did feel a little heavier ’cause o’ that, but whatever...”

I was curious as why didn’t she wipe it off at that time. But since she would surely say something like “I was exercisin’ my neck.”, I didn’t bother asking.

“Get anythin’ interestin’ lately?”

I was about to say, “Oh, that’s right, just a while ago...,” but I held my tongue.

That item I got a while ago would be that creepy box. As to why I had a bad feeling about it, it was because of for what it’s used to do.

What that item does is that it can apparently control just about anything. For example, manipulating people, making them fight, starting wars and, depending on the circumstances, even destroying the world. It’s just as if it were a god’s tool. But by looking at it, it doesn’t seem like anything that powerful, or at least that was what my eyes told me.

While it only took me a short while to ascertain that, since I don’t know how to use it, I wasn’t even able to get it to make an insect move. So I gave up and let it rest deep inside the store, as one of my not-for-sale items.

“A while ago what?”

“A while ago... I had this strange dream. I could feel an unpleasant air. And there was this ear-splitting noise and an incredibly dazzling light. I had never seen anything like it before, but for some reason, my memories are...” Better to talk nothing more of that small box.

“What does that got to do with anythin’? Like I care what you dream about!”

Knock, knock.

“Aah, Mr. Rinnosuke! This shop of yours... It’s dangerous.”

“What do you mean by ‘dangerous’, Reimu? You won’t find a shop more modest than this one.”

It turned out Marisa only came here yesterday because she was free and wanted to kill some time. But maybe she couldn’t stand doing nothing for long, because soon she went somewhere else. Just like a dog frolicking around in the snow.

Today’s visiting customer – wait, she’s not actually a customer – is Reimu. Maybe it’s because only non-customers ever come here that this shop is so modest.

“It’s not a modest shop, it’s simply one where there’s no intention of selling any of its items, isn’t it? But anyway, don’t you ever go outside, Mr. Rinnosuke? Since you are always using heating, the snow on the roof melts and forms a lot of icicles, you know that? If one of those were to fall on someone it would hurt a lot.”

“It’ll be fine. Maybe a prankster fairy will use them to drive away weird people coming to the store.”

“A fairy that drops icicles? I don’t think that’s a fairy from the forest.”

“Well, whatever. Just take them down on your way out. You can do that much, right?”

“Fine by me. But that’s not why I came today. I was asked to give you a message.”

“A message?”

“ ‘In a short while, I’ll be coming to take the usual.’ Just what is the usual?”

“...What do you mean by the usual? And just whose message is that?”

“It’s from Yukari, of course.”

When I imagined Yukari saying this, an unpleasant look appeared on my face. It’s true that I am in her debt, but that youkai girl’s smile is terribly ominous.

“Wasn’t she still hibernating?”

“That’s exactly why she sent a message.”

That’s right, that youkai girl would certainly know something about that small box. However... She is the last person I would want to hand it over to. To date, she has never returned any of the items she arbitrarily took from me. And for some reason, she gives me the chills.

“I have no idea what ‘the usual’ is.”

“Anyway, I’ve delivered the message. Now I have to go out and do some shopping.”

Reimu said that and promptly left. When you come to my shop and then leave saying that you ‘have to do some shopping’, what am I supposed to think? Looks like she is suggesting that I have nothing worth buying here. No, it’s more like she is saying it out loud... I once again took out that small grey box. I imagine this is likely the thing Yukari mentioned. I picked it up by coincidence, so maybe it really is Yukari’s?

The outside items that fall into Gensokyo include items that came through the barrier by accident, items that became ‘illusionary’ because no one used them anymore, items whose users had suddenly disappeared, and so on. So, if this box really is a god’s tool, then it means that the gods have – very likely – disappeared from the outside world.

If this item really can control anything, then Gensokyo can easily be put in a dangerous situation. Especially if I hand it over to that youkai girl, I can’t even imagine what might happen.

No normal person would seriously believe that such a mysterious item like this exists. But in my case, I can’t not believe it, given what I know.

Of all the items from the outside world I have gathered until now, there are some that no one in Gensokyo would believe it possible to create. So it may very well be an item capable of destroying the world. I don’t want to loose into Gensokyo such a powerful tool from the outside capable of wreaking such havoc if I can avoid it. For now, the small grey box shows no sign of working, but who knows when it may release its god-like power? If this ability is set into motion, people might start being controlled, be made to fight, might start wars, and the world might very well be destroyed.

I love Gensokyo as it is. That’s why I can’t possibly give this box away to anyone.

I should break an item as dangerous as this. I should break it with a mallet.

With slight reluctance towards destroying this little grey box, I hit it with all my might.

The next day, I was preparing to go out for the first time in quite a while. I had business that required me to do so.

I had in fact swung a big mallet on that small box yesterday. But it, how can I say it... had a strange outcome. It felt like striking a soft pillow. Surprised, I looked at the end of the mallet...

That was a scene I would rather not recall. There, between the mallet and the small box I was supposed to break, was a white hand that had snuck in between them! Yes, a creature made of only one hand had stopped the mallet. I had struck down as hard as I could, but this (slender, female) hand was calmly interposing. The hand brushed the mallet aside, raised the index finger and, in front of my eyes, waved it left and right. And then, just as if ridiculing me standing there dumbfounded, the hand grabbed the small box and disappeared into the floor along with it.

At that time, I had no idea of what had just happened, and just stood in blank amazement for a while. But once I could think calmly about it, I realized there wasn’t anything mysterious about it. Of everyone that I knew, there was only one that could do this. That’s right. It was that girl who took it. The last one I wanted to give it to.

I still don’t know where she lives. But for now, I’m just getting some fried tofu ready.

“Preparin’ fried tofu... Gonna stand in front of the shop holdin’ it again?”

“Marisa? When did you come inside?” Marisa had suddenly appeared behind me.

“You seemed to be in a hurry, running all over the place, so I just entered and kept quiet. No particular reason.”

That’s right, if I can get Marisa to go searching for me instead of going after her myself, it would be many times more effective.

“Marisa, I have a favor to ask...”

“Go look for Yukari, right? Yeah, sure. Why not?”

“!? How did you know that I wanted you to look for Yukari?”

“The fried tofu.”

Marisa gladly accepted, and went out again almost as soon as she had arrived. In this case... Since it’s so cold, I’d rather not go out myself.

I tried to calm down and think. Just what was that small box? My ability showed me its frightening use, but you wouldn’t think an item that small could have that power. But if Yukari took it when I was about to break it, then it couldn’t have been just another trinket...

It had black, cheap-looking buttons, and some small openings on its back and sides. But its most characteristic feature was the small window just above some buttons, that would neither open nor shut. If you stared for too long at that window, you would almost feel like you could get sucked into it. It was made of a strange artificial material.

However, from its weight, it didn’t seem like there was a lot packed inside it. Rather than danger, what I felt from it was more like an eerie and somewhat lonely feeling. If I had a better sense of intuition, like Reimu, maybe I could’ve sensed something more. Maybe even something like the feelings of the one who used this.

...Why is it that, now that I don’t have it anymore, I remember its details much more clearly? Did my eyes get clouded by all the illusionary visions that my ability showed them? From now on, I should start looking at things without relying only on my ability...

...Knock, knock

I noticed the sound of the front door opening. I must have fallen asleep while I was thinking.

“Whaddya doin’? You send me out lookin’ for someone and then go take a trip to dreamland?”

“Ah, Marisa... Was I sleeping?”

“She was at the shrine, that Yukari. Drinkin’ tea and relaxin’. Guess she forgot about hibernation.”

“So... What did she do?”

“Asked me to deliver a message.”

“Another message? And what is it?”

“Ah, she said ‘Yes, I have received this month’s fee.’ ”

What? So that was for payment? And a monthly one at that? Does she intend to come collecting things every month now? Looks like I walked into a deal with a very troublesome youkai.

“And then she said ‘Didn’t I inform you before that portable things are popular in the outside world now? That’s why this kind of item is appearing a lot. This one is a handheld game machine. You can use it to fight and destroy imaginary enemies, wherever and whenever you are. But unfortunately, this grey one is a rather old variety. It’s only monochromatic... and since it’s so old, almost nobody in the outside world has one anymore. You know, the popular one right now is one that has two screens.’ What’s she talkin’ about?”

“I see now. That’s a relief to hear.”

What kind of “handheld game machine” is it that’s popular in the outside world now? When that small box with the two screens that Yukari mentioned goes out of fashion, maybe it’ll start appearing in Gensokyo as well.

And the icicles on the roof actually fell. I guess a strange person came by so the prankster fairy drove them away?

[paladinwife]

Alright, chaos ask time. How about all the sweet asks for Elizabeth?? :> (and/or Samatoki!!)

oh boy, this is the big one

I will be doing both because I don’t have it in me to say no to either of them

🍩: What’s one thing your f/o has done for you that you thought was very kind and thoughtful of them? How about something you did for them that they considered exceptionally sweet of you?

Elizabeth: For Elizabeth, it was Yua being willing to find something specific from the outside for her. Of course, she would just get it herself, but having Yua willing to make the effort meant more than the food itself. For Yua, as mentioned below, Elizabeth is often keeping an eye on her and making sure she’s safe; once she made an appearance to chase off someone who wouldn’t leave her alone. Perhaps a bit extra, and perhaps a shocking overstep before she was willing to leave her duties before, but that made it mean all the more.

Samatoki: For Samatoki, he’s still grateful that she’s willing to put herself on the line to help keep Nemu safe. He knows it’s not just for him and doesn’t kid himself that it is, but there’s a deep respect from him for doing this. For Akiko, it might be their first meeting; he had no reason to have to intervene when someone was harassing her, but he did. She’s still so appreciative.

🍫: What do you both think is your greatest strength as a couple?

Elizabeth: Yua and Elizabeth are very devoted to one another. Elizabeth is willing to leave behind her duties and the only life she has ever known if it means keeping her safe. But at the same time, Yua, mortal and fragile as she is, is willing to risk her life before. There is little they wouldn’t do for each other, and it’s a testament to the strength of their love.

Samatoki: They’re stronger together than they are apart. Not that either of them is a weak person, I’d honestly say they’re both particularly strong people, but they also know how to cover each other in a way that the two of them are more than they would be alone. If that makes any sense.

🍨: If someone forced you two to participate in a dance competition, what song would you dance to?

Elizabeth: There’s a very easy joke I could make here, considering her tag. But honestly I associate her more with city pop! So I’m going with Selfish High Heels by Yung Bae.

Samatoki: This was surprisingly a struggle, and I settled on DVNO by Justice for no reason but vibes alone.

🧁: What’s something that your f/o has told you that you’ll never forget? Maybe a compliment that made you feel truly loved or something goofy they said when they were half-asleep that you’ll keep laughing at till the end of your days? How about the other way around?

Elizabeth: Yua always remembers Elizabeth talking about how “beautiful” her potential was and how much she loved it; up to this point their relationship had been (largely?) platonic, and this was her first hint that something was going on. It was also shortly before Elizabeth began leaving the Velvet Room to see her, so it was a big sign. Elizabeth remembers her saying she’d love to do anything in the outside world with her; it was kind of an “I love you” in not so many words. She knew her gracious guest would have done so anyway, but to think she wanted it so much - truly enough to move her to tears!

Samatoki: Something Aki always remembers is from earlier on, before she was even in the Party; she mentioned off-hand needing to get home from the burlesque show later than usual, and Samatoki, without hesitation, messaged her to “get home safe.” She wasn’t used to that level of concern about her. It’s something he continued to show, even as she was swept into the Party and then as they both considered romantic feelings. Either way, it meant something to her. For Samatoki, it was her saying she’s always here to listen. It just felt genuine, and it was a sign that maybe his wall was cracking.

🍦: Are there any new activities that you’d like to try as a couple?

Elizabeth: oh so much. Elizabeth, on account of being a Velvet Room resident, is pretty sheltered. But there’s just so many foods for her to eat, and things to do, and events to attend. Imagine her getting to attend a party with Yua! She’d be so excited.

Samatoki: Aki has the oddly specific desire to dance with him. He probably feels a little outclassed (I mean, she’s danced for how many years?), but it’s just an experience she’s itching to have with him. It doesn’t even matter if he’s any good, so long as they’re enjoying themselves.

🍪: What’s one simple thing that one of you does that makes the other’s heart melt?

Elizabeth: Elizabeth loves new experiences, and moreover, she loves food. She adores being brought new snacks from the outside, and she makes her gratitude very clear whenever Yua brings her one. On the other hand, Elizabeth is often keeping watch over Yua - and at least once, Elizabeth has intervened in a situation to keep her safe. She often doesn’t know at the time, but it gets her quite emotional if she hears about it after.

Samatoki: Something that has been a constant in her relationship since the beginning, Samatoki is always making sure that Akiko is safe and not being disrespected. He’s quick to intervene if someone is being creepy or disrespectful (again), and it really does mean a lot to Aki, considering her situation. For Samatoki’s side, Aki is nothing if not a good listening ear. She’s always available for him to let off some emotions, and maybe it’s not that unusual, but it means a lot to him.

🍰: What do you think your life will look like in ten years? Do you and your f/o plan in getting married or having kids?

Elizabeth: Things are often unpredictable, largely because Elizabeth herself is unpredictable, but also because her world and Yua’s interact in unpredictable ways. It’s hard to say for sure - however, Elizabeth is interested in marriage, and while it wouldn’t necessarily have political implications for them, the symbolic importance is very high to her.

Samatoki: Oh boy. I don’t think either of them really knows. Their relationship is still so young, and so many things can change. That said, though, Aki does think she’s serious about him, and the feeling is mutual I’d say. They are entertaining the thought that this could be for the long term.

🍓: What do you think is the main reason your relationship is so successful?

Elizabeth: As mentioned before, the devotion, but particularly that combined with flexibility. Their relationship is powered by deep admiration and love, combined with enough versatility to confront the unusual challenges their relationship will face. Despite the fact that their situation is just so weird, they keep finding ways to make it work because they love each other.

Samatoki: A lot of patience and care. Their situations are very different and often seem incompatible, but their care for one another motivates them to work through it. They’re very persistent and determined to love each other through it all.

🍒: Do you think your personalities complement each other?

Elizabeth: Yes! This one is another one of those situations where the contrast is what they need. Elizabeth is vibrant and wild and full of wonder, bringing light to Yua’s heart; Yua’s calm and level headed personality grounds and guides her. They work very well together!

Samatoki: Another yes! Though I think they’re more similar than Elizabeth and Yua. They have some similarities to draw them close, but they can cover one another’s weaknesses and make each other stronger. I say they’re very complementary.

🍎: Do you have any quirks that you didn’t notice until your f/o pointed it out or vice versa?

Elizabeth: Almost everything about her is a quirk! A lot about her often reads as unusual due to the fact that she is a Velvet Room resident and is sheltered from the outside. Yua eventually gets good at reading her unusual expressions and body language. And in return, Elizabeth catches a lot about Yua! Her many expressions, her habits, her specific phrases (which she sometimes picks up herself) - she catches it all.

Samatoki: I mentioned before that Aki catches on to his stressed/angry/upset tells. The jaw clenching, the hand shaking, the terseness (more than usual). It’s not a quirk in the same way, but it means she can catch on to his negative feelings fast and often before others. And I discussed how he knows she has something on the mind, but he notices a lot more about her than just that. He’s the one to notice her weird little behaviors when she’s feeling something or something is on her mind. How she forgets where she’s put things more if something is upsetting her, or how sometimes if her eyes keep flitting away from his she’s feeling very strongly. I feel like he’s an observant sort anyway, but especially for her.

🍉: What do you think is the most valuable lesson your relationship has taught you?

Elizabeth: It’s the persistence and adaptability! They can’t always predict the strange things that their worlds and lifestyles colliding will cause, or what potential obstacles it will bring them. They always have to be ready to change course to tend to each other’s needs, and I don’t think either has any problem with that.

Samatoki: Like I said, it has to be that persistence. That how much they care matters more than their circumstances, or most other things. How much they care means they can work despite what comes at them.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #406

“turned on all the lights, the tv, and the radio  /  still, i can’t escape the ghost of you”

Have you ever had an ulcer? No. Do you have any rare medical conditions? I believe AvPD is considered to be a rare mental disorder. Do you have to carry an epi pen? No. What color is your mailbox? I think it's black. I don't pay attention. Would you ever want a job working with animals? I'd love to. The thing is, without a degree in something, my duties working with animals would almost certainly involve cleaning up after them, which I am WAY too squeamish with fecal matter and vomit to do. It's extremely embarrassing, but I've never even been able to clean up after my own pets if they ever had an accident or got sick. I obviously couldn't do it with random animals. Did you have a good high school experience? It's... so odd, retrospecting on high school. In some ways, it was the best time of my life because of my memories with my friends and especially Jason, but at the time, I absolutely loathed it and was horribly depressed. But at least I saw a future for myself. I took better care of myself, all that stuff... That Brittany would be fucking mortified to get a glimpse at who she becomes. Have you ever watched any Monty Python movies? Which one is your favourite? I know I've seen some of at least one. Would you ever get a "below the belt" piercing? Nah. If a couple is married, do you think there should be any legal punishment if one person cheats? No...? Like don't get me wrong at all, I am firmly against cheating under any circumstance, but for there to be legal retribution seems extreme. What is the greatest source of anxiety for you? My future. Are there any hallucinogenic drugs you’d like to try? Nah man. What made you choose your current job? I'm unemployed. Do you feel uncomfortable on the dance floor? Or are you confident with you dancing abilities? Oh hunny, you won't see me on the dance floor. Unless MAYBE if the Cha-Cha Slide comes on, or the Cupid Shuffle. That's as skilled as I get, haha. Is it exciting to you to imagine having an affair with a teacher? ... No??????????? It's fucking creepy. Adultery isn't exciting. Do you like your smile? No. I absolutely look high when I smile. What is something silly that you believed to be true when you were a child? That I could invoke the traits of any animal, which I just referred to as my "animal powers." Like for example, if I "called upon" a kangaroo, I could jump higher. I was a weird fucking kid. Have you ever been in a relationship with someone you completely connected with on a mental/emotional level, but did not find physically attractive in any way? Was physical intimacy a problem? How did it work out? I was never really physically attracted to Girt, but it was never a big deal to me. I cared way more about his personality and how much he cared about me. We were never really "intimate," per se, we just would give each other a simple peck. It didn't work out, but not at all because of physical things. He was just too much of a brother to me. What classic or cult movie have you never seen and have no desire to? Hm. I know there's some, but I'm blanking. Does The Human Centipede count here? Like everyone knows about it, so I would assume it does. I have ZERO desire to see a second of that repulsive movie. Have you ever taken a real liking to a band/singer you never ever....ever thought you'd enjoy? Maybe Melanie Martinez? Her voice is so cutesy, as are some of her songs, but I really enjoy how dark her lyrics can be. People who know me would probably be shocked to hear I thoroughly like her. After seeing the movie Avatar did you suddenly view our Earth as ugly and/or boring? If you have not seen the movie, do you think it’s worth your time? I've seen a little bit of it, but I never finished it because I was very tired and chose to go to sleep. I actually do want to see the full thing, though; it looks very good. How helpful are your parents to you? Would they help you to pay for your first apartment? College? Where does the line end? My parents are truly incredible with helping me the best they are capable of. They helped me pay for school, among other things, but I doubt they'd help with my first home, whenever that is. I wouldn't really want them to, either, because that's my responsibility for sure. Do you like playing video games? If so, what do you usually play? I love video games, and horror is absolutely my favorite genre. I also love fantasy games though with deep stories. I've never been the best at playing super long games, like Final Fantasy games, even if I'm seriously invested in the story, though. I burn out. Have you ever sewn a garment? No. Are there any plants in the room you’re in? No. I don't bother with plants. What’s your highest level of education? Some college. What’s the most important thing in any kind of relationship? Proper communication, probably. If you wear lipstick, what’s your favourite colour to wear? I only really put on lipstick to occasionally take a picture, and it's pretty much always black. Is your style feminine, masculine or somewhere in the middle? Somewhere in the middle, I guess? Are there a lot of dragonflies around your house? I've never seen one around this house, and I doubt I ever will because it's too urban. When we lived in the woods, however, I saw them a lot. Of all the Disney couples, which one would you say is your favorite? Kovu and Kiara came to my mind first. Do you think it is cute/funny or disgraceful when a child swears? It's shocking, more than anything. You don't expect it. I don't believe it should be encouraged, but only because children just don't know when swearing really isn't appropriate. If/when you have a baby, how do you think you would want to decorate its room? I don't want kids, but I'll entertain the question and assume this is before the child is born and develops interests. Whether it's a boy or a girl, I'd probably go with a cutesy animal theme. Would you more likely buy a shirt with a picture of Mickey/Minnie Mouse, a Winnie the Pooh character, Snoopy, Hello Kitty, or Tweety Bird on it? None, honestly. Perhaps like, a gothic Hello Kitty. Of all the states you have been to, which one did you have the best experiences? Putting aside the AWFUL heat and humidity, I probably had the best time in Florida. I loved all the palm trees, seeing so many lizards on my grandma's patio, and going to Disney World was a blast. I liked that swimming pools were always warm, too. Have you ever had a crush on someone “too young” for you? No. Do you regret losing your virginity to who you lost it to? No. I was madly in love with him, so no regrets on that. If your boyfriend ever hit you, would you dump him? HA, BYYYYEEEEEEEEE MOTHERFUCKER. ZERO hesitation. Did the one person who hurt you most in your life apologize? He did, but I honestly don't know if he meant it. Is there anything you want to say to someone? It'll probably go unsaid for the rest of my life. If they were to televise a live execution, would you watch it? Yikes, hard pass. If you could be the president of the USA, would you be willing to do it? Noooo thank you. Did you wake up in the middle of the night? I always do. Does your animal sleep with you? My cat does. Venus obviously sleeps in her terrarium, but she is in my room. Last color you dyed your hair? Red. Will you keep your last name when you get married? Very unlikely. I don't like my last name. What are you looking forward to? Hearing back again from the woman whose wedding I shot literally two years ago. I thought she ghosted me, but she messaged me the other day about seeing the pictures again and going through them to actually buy some. I don't know why the hell it took her two years, but whatever, I guess? I spent two whole hours resizing the files and re-adding the preview watermark (I deleted the OneDrive folder for space forever ago, but I have the files still), so I hate to sound like an ass, but she better buy something. Between sweating my ass off on location when I shot the wedding, editing those 100+ pictures two years ago, and now re-doing the previews, I have invested so much goddamn time into them that yeah, I think I have the right to be pretty damn salty if I don't hear back from her again. If your significant other cut sex out of your relationship for any reason, what would you do? It'd be whatever. I mean sure, that sort of intimacy is a very special part of serious romantic relationships to me, but I can live without it pretty easily. What was the last thing you said out loud? "Thank you for dinner" to my mom. She brought home Hardee's. Who are your godparents? I don't believe I have any. Do you like Gushers? omggggg yes Can you touch​ your nose with your tongue?​​ No. Is there a particular sport you follow on a regular basis? Nope. Are you waiting for something to arrive in the mail? No. Think of the last film you watched. Who was your favourite character? Uhhhh what was it... The Shining, I think? I didn't really develop a favorite. Do you have a friend whose name starts with ‘L’? Describe him/her. Lisa. <3 She's one of my WoW friends. She'll talk your ear off, but I don't really mind. She is SO sweet and caring for other people and loves to cook. She recently had triplets, and seeing as she had a son only months before accidentally getting pregnant with the triplets, she's obviously been MEGA busy so we haven't talked much lately. When you’re being kissed do you like it when they hold your face? Yeah, but not too early on. Doing that has a promise of seriousness and passion in it to me, and it would probably weird me out if that happened too soon. Last thing that made you cry? My health. Would you ever consider getting a piercing in your septum? Nah. I don't think it would look good on me. Do you enjoy being outdoors? If it's cool outside and I have a place to sit when I want to, yeah. Do people tell you that you have an accent? Only sometimes. It's definitely not as bad as your average Southerner, though. Do you enjoy watching fireworks on the 4th of July? Ha, what nice timing. I think they're very pretty, but I believe I went over in a recent survey how I don't encourage their usage in consideration of veterans with PTSD as well as being conscious of animals and the absolute terror it can cause for them. What’re some unspeakable subjects for you? So my sister is a children's social worker, and she shares a LOT of stories with Mom (and me, if I'm present) that I can't listen to. The ones that involve pedophilia and/or rape, especially from the child's very own parent(s), I just cannot listen to. Period. It's so fucking repulsive and just unimaginable to me how even a monster of a human can commit something THAT goddamn vile. What’s your opinion of root beer? I'm not a big fan. I mean I can tolerate drinking some of it, but I don't really *enjoy* it. Have you ever seen The Breakfast Club, and what’s your opinion of it? I have, and I didn't get the appeal at all. Did you have a Furby when you were younger? Oh god, I did. Those things are so creepy. If you had a baby boy, what would you name him? Damien, most likely.

[brieflymagnificentangel]

some days i hate being a woman

today is that day.

today is the day where all the things my mother taught me about ‘looking good for a job’, that ‘men only want to get in your pants so you should use that to your advantage’, ‘you should vanquish other women for your gain’ bullshit came true

i went to dinner with a man i met very randomly. he took a picture of me during my birthday at a restaurant a few years ago bc i was alone and he thought i could use a picture. this was totally non-creepy given the circumstances, and he was much older than me which also put him in the non creepy category immediately for me (rookie mistake but oh well). over the years we keep in touch semi-regularly talking about career stuff maily.

a few years later were in the same city and he asks to meet. i originally wanted to wear a blazer and shirt to show clearly THIS IS NOT A DATE but i decided to believe in men just this once and so wore a casual turtle neck and skirt. cute professional. 

this man first say there would be a third party. third party disappeared the day of. and now this man takes me to a tailor to buy a 900$ suit. while. i sit there. that in itself is not necessarily bad; as he framed it, it’s for “the experience”. as i had no idea of what happened next i just accepted my fate and decided to take it on to see how cool this would be

it was p cool albeit a little boring. things got weird when my man started asking me for my opinion. i then noticed no ring on his finger. that is when the ‘oh shit’ moment hit. i was the slut. the tailors must have thought that. this guy made me sit while he asks for my opinion on irrelevant fabrics (mind you, WE HAD NEVER HAD A PROPER CONVERSATION BEFORE THIS JESUS CHRIST). this would have been fine had it been truly platonic. but.. unless youre family/have know each other well for a while do you take a woman half your age to a tailor to show how much you can blow off in one night? you dont. 

it was a lil weird at this point but i thought what the hell this guy took me to a tailor he’s either gonna propose to me down the line or does not view me as a sex object, just a... tailor servant? idk lol anyway we get to the restaurant. we talk and he’s a genuinely interesting dude, so we talk. we’re talking and everything is fine and then.. first shadow of red flag. we were talking about how we met and he mentioned talking to a friend about it like: “oh i mean im only into her if she’s into me” kinda deal. internally im like fuck externally i laugh bc hiw ludocrus. WE JUST SPENT THE PAST HOUR TALKING ABOUT SUITS AND YOURE TRYING TO HIT ON ME RN??????????????????? so we continue talking and the bomb lands: “you’re very attractive”. shit broke my fucking heart. the context of the convo made the sentence to mean physically. that is when i thought ‘i hate being a woman’. we were just having a cool interesting convo about how you grew up and what you learned from it and you just..... ruined it. like fuck man i thought you were actually interested in my work and my trajectory not my looks. i put on the physically repulsed body language on and he stops for a while but then.... he says it again. and again. and then he says “it’s kind of sad in restaurant the guys who are looking for something serious but the girl so obviously wants just food”. took me a minute to realize he thought that was what was going on. no dickhead i want a GODDAMN FRIEND. a friend! a person i can hear stories from!!!!!! no t food!!! i wanted to pay!!! you refused !!! jeSUS. we continue on and we’re talking about some really cool philosophy topic (yeah im a nerd go on) and suddenly.... “you know that’s how i used to pick up girls right? philosophy”. i wanted to laugh and cry. and die. just.. why would you ruin a perfectly good moment. i was having fun. you were too. why. just why. along wiht comments like “women in the work place: you don’t have to be the most beautiful flower, you just have to be the flower”. just. my mother had to endure these assholes all throughout her career. the thing is.. he’s actually an intriguing person and i want to know him more for his story and path. not for his goddamn dick. but my point is i don’t thoroughly hate him; he’s not an outright disgusting guy. actually pretty nice. that makes it worst.

so basically women are not allowed to have men friends bc of their sex object status. growing up i hated being a woman (i didnt wanna be a man, i just didnt want to be seen as gendered). i remembered why tonight especially.

i got the courage to tell his to stop in a message after we met (in a very non confrontational way). time to say goodbye to a good friend/work mentor i guess. kill me.

[ssixa]

CHANCE ENCOUNTER//MARK TUAN X Y/N

Description: Walking into the night shift at the hospital proves to keep you on your toes. Nights are left to the universe so you can only hope that tonight will be decent. What happens when you find out that one of your patients is THE Mark Tuan from GOT7? how do you try to deal with the chaos erupting from this chance encounter? and how many times do you have to tell yourself that you love your job?

Genre: fluff, slight cringe

Pairing: Black Fem Reader x Mark Tuan (though I will say there isn’t much description of black characteristics)

Word count: 3.5K

Warning: explicit language

A/n: yay finally a long chapter! glad y’all are enjoying this story! The collage sucks for this one, but it was a struggle lol.

*All pic collages are made by me unless I state otherwise. Individual pictures in the collage are not mine and I give credit to where credit is due.

Chapter Six

~Months Later~

I can’t believe the tour has already kicked off! Especially it being a world tour, the poor boys are going to be so excited and yet exhausted. 

“Yo bitch, whatcha doin this weekend?” I text my best friend y/f/n

“Nothin, probs just going to the bar. Wassup?” She replied 

“Guess who scored us some tickets to a very specific concert that we couldn’t get tickets for?” I send with a smirk

“Biittchhhh you dddiiiddnn’ttttt”

“Bbbiiittcchhhh I dddiiiddd” 

“How the hell did you get Got7 tickets when they’re sold out...what organs did you sell?” She questioned suddenly 

“Let’s just say I met a trustworthy person who was selling them for cheap” I reply not wanting to ruin the surprise

“Fuck it, I don’t want to know, just tell me how much they are later” she sends

“Np” 

“Also we better take some cute ass pics when we’re there, but then again, when do we ever not take cute ass pics” I send 

“Bitch you best believe I’ll look cute, don’t you worry” 

I put my phone away after scrolling through my social medias out of boredom. This weekend can’t come fast enough honestly. Just gotta make it through the work week at my other job. Yet again so many Karen’s coming in and doing what Karen’s do, men fully disregarding what I’m saying because I’m a young black woman; so on and so forth. The week was more busy than I thought because at a blink of an eye it was Saturday aka the day of the Got7 concert! I decided to get dressed at y/f/n’s place since it would be more convenient since she lives closer to the venue.

After getting dressed (and lookin fucking cute, but sexy at the same time) we head to the venue. I direct y/f/n that we should walk towards the ticketing booth in order to pick up the tickets. Luckily the tour and this venue had a common agreement on different ways you can have your tickets and luckily buying and picking up the physical ones at the booth was one option. 

“Ugh I seriously need to find out who got you these tickets! They can be our concert ticket dealer hahaha” y/f/n says

“A girl has her secrets” I give her a wink and keep walking.

We head towards the entrance of the venue and wait in line until doors open. As we do for past concerts, we start conversations with other fans in line. A basic convo of “who’s your bias?”, “what other groups do y’all stan?”, etc. Luckily it makes the time go by faster because before we knew it, doors opened and they started scanning tickets and letting everyone in. We found our seats and saw that some of the fans we made friends with in line were sitting right behind us. We continued our conversation about nothing specific really until I felt my phone vibrate. I looked down and see that Mark messaged me, 

“Y/NNNNNNN!!!!” Mark messaged

“MAAARRRKKKK!!!” I replied 

“I see you”

“Can you please not be creepy”

“Awe but it’s fun! ANYWAYS I can’t believe you’re here I can’t wait to see you!” he replied excitedly 

“I can’t wait to see you either! First time I’m getting to see you performing on stage. I seriously can’t” I quickly reply

“OH RIGHT! I remember why I texted you, check under your chair” he messaged

“You’re making me nervous boy”

“First of all, I’m a man. Second of all, stop being a wimp and look under your chair” he replies back with an eye rolling emoji. 

I decide to give in and squeeze myself on the ground between my chair and the chair in front of me. I feel a little bit around until my hand takes hold of something. I pull it out and it’s an envelope so I open it because what harm is there in opening a mysterious envelope from Mark. When I opened it, I shut it just as quickly, I looked side to side to make sure no one saw, shoved it in my bag, and grabbed my phone. 

“Mark Tuan imma kill you” I message adding a crying emoji

“Am I your favorite member now?” he said with a cute emoji

“Nope, still loyal, but Mark you really didn’t have to do this! VIP BACKSTAGE PASSES”

“How could I not?! You’re one of my friends that I cherish and it’s been so long. The fact that you thought that just attending the concert would be the end of it...I’m hurt” he replies almost sounding a little too butthurt. 

“Fine fine, but you know I love you right! I seriously can’t believe I can even call you a friend, let alone a close friend at that!” I message excitedly 

“I-love you too, you’re seriously someone I didn’t expect to show up in the circumstances they did. Thank goodness you did though, I was on the brink of murdering Yug because he was just calling me by my name. That child has no respect”

“Mark, honey, you’re American, I wouldn’t have guessed you were so serious about that type of stuff” I retorted

“Well I’m used to the way things run so I just want to hit him sometimes, what an annoying brat” he sent. I ended up laughing and y/f/n looked at me curious as to what was so funny on my phone. I quickly hid it, but I already knew she knew something was up. That’s why I was grateful when she didn’t push further because she knows I always end up spilling the tea later.

“That makes sense anyways you see where I am right?” I ask

“Yup, you look pretty” he comments as he always does

“Whatever, you see the girl to the right of me?” 

“Kinda, I can’t really see her face though”

“Oh let me help” I replied. 

“Yo y/f/n let’s take a pic” I get her attention. She turned around and agreed seeing that it wasn’t unusual for us to take pics together, especially at concerts. 

“Ooo these are cute” she comments then turns back around to keep talking to our new friends. 

“See now, cute right?” I text Mark

“Oh yeah~ she’s cute I guess, what about her though?” He replies

“That’s the friend I was telling you about and lucky for you she doesn’t have a solid bias in the group yet” I mention knowing that it would peek his interest. 

“Oh she doesn’t now, well now I’m even more excited to meet her” he comments, with easy excitement detected in his message. 

“Well thanks to you, we all get to meet each other!” I message excitedly 

“You’re very welcome sweetheart, but I gtg my turn to get pretty” he sends

“Lol you’ve always been pretty, but see you later!” 

“Lol bye” he texted lastly. 

I spend the rest of the time before the concert trying to devise how I’m going to keep surprising y/f/n until we reach the boys while still talking to our new friends. I decided that I would say I found these badges in one of the bathroom stalls after going in after a staff member and decided that it would be our ticket into the backstage. Perfect, not only is it a crazy idea, but the prize at the end (her reaction) will be the icing on the cake. I decided to text Mark about the plan and to also tell the manager so when we do get back there we don’t get in actual trouble. He saw my message and sent an emoji making sure I understood he got the message. This made the whole experience even better.  

The lights dimmer and we knew the show was starting. The whole place erupted in screams and chants of “Got7” echoing everywhere. The stage lit up and the boys walked out. I screamed and almost busted a lung at how good the boys looked up there. Mark looking exceptionally nice almost made me forget how much of an idiot he really is. It amazes me how humans can deceive each other so easily by just putting on an act. 

The concert was beyond amazing! I almost forgot while in the middle of the concert how I actually know the boys and consider them my friends. My mind went back to just being a simple ahgase and it being just that. It wasn’t until Mark came to my side of the stage and did some weird thing that I recalled that I actually know this fool personally. Then Mark pointed me out to the other members so once they spotted me they made their rounds to come to my side of the stage and do something that made my whole side scream. One girl in front of me thought that the finger heart from Jackson was for her when it was really meant for me. Poor girl.

The concert went on, screams were loud, fanchants were strong, light stick choreo was on point, the BOYS choreo was definitely on point, and honestly everything was just perfect. In the back of my head I couldn’t wait to finally meet the boys and better yet, be able to get this secret off my chest. I still hadn’t told anyone of me knowing the boys so to be able to tell y/f/n was going to be a load off my chest. It was the end of the concert with the boys concluding it with a classic that is “A.” During one of the chorus point dances JB came to my side of the stage like he had done once or twice before. While Youngjae and him sang the chorus JB never stopped looking me during the certain lyrics

“Ei da aneunde wae jakku sumgyeo

Nega nal joahaneunge imi

Ne eolgure sseuyeoisseo

Ei nareul boda wae nuneul dollyeo

Da aneunde ei e...”

(Translated: “Hey I already know everything so why are you hiding

It’s written all over your face that you like me

Hey why do you look away

I know everything”)

Contradictory to the lyrics, more specifically JB’s verse, I couldn’t look away. Was he confessing...to me? There’s now way. My heart sped up at the thought that my bias, my ult bias at that, has feelings for me! It was hard to get immersed in the rest of the concert with my head getting mixed signals of what JB really did was meant for me or just did it to tease me, not like it would be the first time. We talked a lot over messenger and really clicked, that included him reminding me that he knew that he was my favorite. Yeah I grew legit feelings for him, but my brain rationalized that it wouldn’t make sense for that to ever exist beyond that, but if what he did right now on stage was him confessing to me, maybe...there’s a chance.

It’s just the possibility of him liking me from only talking to me, while my feelings have existed. I need to stop thinking about this because there’s no way

“Y/n just enjoy the rest of the concert” I mumbled to myself. Thank goodness it was loud and dark enough that no one could hear me or see me. 

When the concert ended, y/f/n and I just sat there in utter amazement. We couldn’t believe we just had the chance to witness this and not to mention a relief since it had been so long for Got7 to come back to a city near enough that we could travel. After a moment of shock, I looked at her

“Yo bitch” I said to grab her attention

“What bitch?” She replied, such friendship

“This night ain’t over yet” I commented and signaled for her to look down her face of confusion and shock filled her face

“Y/n how the hell did you get these?!” She whispered yelled to not get much attention to us

“Remember when I went to the bathroom earlier? I guess I used a stall after one of the staff members and they misplaced it there” I commented hoping she would believe the lie

“Y/n you don’t do wild shit like that though, it’s always me” she mentions 

“I know but I’m willing to risk it all because what’s the worst that could happen?” I say hoping to convince her

“Well first we could be black listed by JYP, we would be the new face of sasaengs and last I checked there aren’t many or many in general black sasaengs...that should be enough reasons not to do it” she said.

“Yes, but if it works then we have a high chance of meeting Got7 and think about how much staff they have. What’s the likeliness they would know who we are'' I bring up

“Damn, you making me do dumb bitch shit...fine I’m in” she says. Score. 

We made our way out with most everyone just like normal, but snuck away to a secluded area where security wasn’t looking through. We slipped through a door that led through a hallway that led backstage. Getting backstage we were looked at sideways but everyone was rushing everywhere not paying us any mind (thank goodness their staff was pretty diverse), but I’m surprised no one noticed how different we stick out especially with our outfits. . 

We slip passed another door, we turned around getting stopped in our tracks by the boys’ manager. He wore this scowl on his face and both of us freaked. Then I remembered Mark texted me saying the manager would have eyes around the place so when we sneak in he would know where we were. So when running into him and seeing the scowl I knew he was just faking it and yet it was so believable. He stared us down,

“Now I don’t think I recognize you two” he comments 

“Um well you see” y/f/n starts in a slight panic

“We were given these passes by someone higher up in the company so we just decided to let ourselves in instead of waiting for the person they were going to send” I replied back confidently hoping it sounded believable enough...to y/f/n that is.

“‘Someone higher up huh?’ well who might that be exactly?” he questioned 

“I don’t have to say and you can’t make me” I snap back with a bit of attitude 

“Well if it is like that, I can’t allow you to proceed any further” he snarls back. Wow he’s really into this. JYP should really look into an acting career for this man and if not that give him a raise or something.

“Now if you two ladies could follow me to this room and I’ll get security to come deal with you both” he continued. y/f/n was getting visibly overwhelmed, but thankfully she had her inhaler with her. I hated to see that her reaction was getting that intense, but we were so close.

“Fine” I replied back fake angrily. y/f/n and I follow the manager back to a room that was labeled “Security” on the front. Perfect, everything was going to plan. Mark helped give more detail to my plan and thought to get a sheet of paper and put security to make the plan more believable. What we didn’t know though is under that sheet of paper it actually said “Artists Dressing Room.” It also occurred to me how good the manager's english had gotten. I guess it worked out with my Korean also getting much better as well. Luckily, I told y/f/n that I decided to study Korean again so she didn’t question why I was able to speak so well. She is able to speak pretty well herself, but the intensity of the situation caused her brain to freak out not being able to respond.

Once we reached the door, the manager slowly turned around. We briefly made eye contact and a smirk slightly graced his face. This is it, y/f/n looked like her nerves were a bit calmer, but I was sure to stand behind her in case she passed out. The manager opened the door and stepped to the side, he ushered us in and I gasp really loudly, 

“OMG IT’S GOT7” I exclaim. The boys all shot their heads up from different areas of the room, the sense of panic that graced their face for a few seconds made it even better. That stupid Mark, I guess he didn’t tell the boys of the plan so they must have thought that we were crazed fans who actually snuck in. Once the boys stared in shock for a few more seconds, all the sudden I hear

“y/nnnnn!!!” Mark screamed and dashed from the chair he was lounging in for a hug. I start laughing hysterically when I turn to see y/f/n’s hella confused face. It took me all the strength to try and stop laughing, but eventually I was able to calm down enough to talk,

“SURPRISE BITCH!!” I look to y/f/n and yell, her face still in utter shock and confusion. 

“Hey boys” I wave crazily to the boys who finally have the previous shock go away and have faces grazed with the biggest of smiles.

“y/n, how are you here?!” Youngjae questioned. From my peripheral vision I could see the boys look with beaming eyes mentally waiting for the answer to that same exact question they were all sharing. I look to Mark and comment

“You idiot, you didn’t tell them?” I laugh

“Well seeing you were surprising your friend, I wanted to do the same for the boys” he laughed back. 

“Makes sense, this was worth it though to see their faces” we both started laughing. Mark went on to explain in Korean about the plan we concocted and how we were able to execute it along with the help of the manager and other staff members. The boys nod and I turn to y/f/n explaining everything similarly. 

“I hate you so much right now” y/f/n says but with humor

“Awe but I love you so much” I replied back lovingly

“Mark this is my friend y/f/n I was telling you about before” I turn to Mark and say

“Nice to meet you!” Mark said with a bright smile

“Nice to meet you too” y/f/n replied back slightly shyly but still with slight confidence. Mark directs us to go and sit down on the chair that was previously occupied by him and Jackson. We all took a seat while BamBam, Yug, and JB were getting their makeup taken off and getting dressed in more comfier clothing behind a panel. 

“This is crazy that we’re finally getting to meet you y/n though it feels like we’ve been friends for ages’ Jackson speaks up.

“I know right! It’s still surreal that we’re all pretty good friends given we’ve never met physically...well except for Mark that is” 

“Wait how do you even know Mark...like how the hell did that even happen?” y/f/n speaks up. The boys looked at each other surprised that she didn’t know even though Mark and I had been talking for months. I look to Mark to see if it was fine to tell her given that he’s not one of my patients anymore, but still it would be illegal and immoral to start spilling unless allowed. He gives me the go ahead and I turn back to y/f/n and explain to her how it came to be. From all the stupid stuff he said to getting to talk to the boys over facetime, nothing was left unturned. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing and how lucky I was to have a chance encounter like this. 

“Wow you really lived the ‘y/n’ life right now huh?” She commented

“I’m just glad I was able to get it off my chest, it was really hard trying to keep this a secret for that long” I laughed 

“But why now, like how long you think you would’ve held it in if they didn’t have a tour?” she questioned

“Honestly I was close to just spilling everything, but luckily the tour was announced. You can also thank Mark for the free tickets and passes by the way” I laughed. y/f/n looked at Mark and had no other way of phrasing words than to say thank you multiple times

“It’s no problem at all, your reaction was priceless though! It made it worth it in the end” he laughed.

I sit there looking at my surroundings amazed this is actually happening. Mark irritatingly asked y/f/n to tell him stories of stupid shit I’ve done in the past because I refused to tell him. y/f/n went along I’m guessing as payback for the stupid stunt I pulled with this whole encounter. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea to put those two together because now Jackson is listening in and I guess so is BamBam from the makeup chair because I can hear him laughing along with everyone else at some part of the story that I don’t even remember (I must have been drunk...whoops). Even then, I don’t think anything could top this moment…

Now I have to figure out why JB has been avoiding interactions with me since y/f/n and I walked in. 

Previous/Next

[creek-cryptid-deluxe]

Oh man... I just had an experience and a half at the park.

So let me just start by saying that I go to this park pretty regularly in the evening or at night, especially in the warmer months. My dad walks Bailey (& Indie when she isn't struggling with her injury) & I cruise about in my wheelchair hunting pokemon or park over by a mural that has a bricked area that connects to the sidewalk but is off to the side. It happens to be positioned so that I'm within range of 2 pokestops, so I park and drop lures. We are often there after dark & I pretty much never have an issue. In fact, I have more issues during daylight because some middle aged women can't keep their opinions to themselves.

So I was parked in my spot, & Dad & Bailey happened to be nearby because there is a treeline right across where bunnies frequently appear & Bailey like to pretend to be a hunter. (She suddenly morphs from a giant goofy beast to a silent, graceful, statuesque predator which is crazy to see.) I was chilling, catching them all as the theme song instructs, listening to Frank Zappa sing about Saint Alfonso & his pancakes when Dad & Bailey appear next to me, striking up a conversation.

During this conversation, I see an older guy who was headed directly for us, make an abrupt direction change. I mention it to dad, saying he must find Bailey unsettling. I mean, it is dark & she is waist high on all fours. Dad says, "Yeah he was booking it directly toward you & it gave me a bad feeling, so I thought I'd come chat just in case." I thanked him & applauded his instincts. I guess all the stories I'd told him about women being attacked over guys feeling rejected & the fact that The Spawn narrowly escaped a kidnapping across the street from our house a couple days ago (thankfully her boyfriend was there) made an impact on him.

After the dude left, we carried on as we normally do. But the dude made another loop & I saw him approaching. I genuinely hoped that he was just out for a walk & had been put off by the sight of Bailey earlier.

I think we all know at this point that this wasn't the case.

This significantly overweight man who looked to be my dad's age walks over & says, "Hey beautiful. What's your name?"

Me: "Not interested."

Dude: "That's rude. You should really be nicer since your prospects are limited. Not many guys will put up with a cripple but I'm willing to overlook that since I find you so beautiful despite that."

Me: "I am gorgeous but you wouldn't know since it's dark. Being gorgeous & having a fantastic personality, my options are absolutely not limited, so fuck off. You're way too old & creepy for me."

Dude: "Too old? Don't act like I didn't just see you flirting with that guy before. He's got to be around my age, so I know you have no problem with an older man."

Me: "Dude, even if I was into older guys, that doesn't mean I'm obligated to give you the time of day. Also, that was my father."

Dude: "Oh, so you're into having a daddy? I can be your daddy."

Me: (after throwing up a little in my mouth because I DESPISE that 'daddy' shit) "Fucking gross. He is my FATHER. As in he had sex with my mother & I am the result. And I seriously suggest you get the fuck out of here before he & my very protective great dane come back. She's not a fan of strange men being near me."

Dude: "Fine, bitch. You're going to die alone since you think you can afford to be picky even though you're crippled & not even that cute."

Me: "Better to die alone than deal with someone like you for more than 5 minutes. I'm calling my dad."

I picked up my phone & dialed, putting the phone to my ear. At that point he quickly walked back the way he came muttering about me being a bitch & how he was 'trying to be nice'.

🤢🤢

What the actual fuck is it with dudes thinking they are entitled to a woman's time & attention? Also, why in the fuck would i give the time of day to someone who starts insulting me straight off? Or won't take no for an answer? Or thinks it's ok to approach a woman out at a park seemingly alone?

For a bit of contrast, a couple of dudes in their 20s walked by to fish at the pond. One came back by, asked how I was & when I responded & asked how he was, he told me he forgot his bait & laughed. When he came back he continued with "but overall I'm good. Was the dog I saw with you your service dog?" I said no because she's too stubborn to even listen to simple commands 3/4 of the time, much less listen to urgent commands that mitigate my disability. He laughed & said that was fair, told me his name & said to 'holler' if I needed any help while I was there. I thanked him & we wished each other good luck for the night (me with pokemon & him with fishing).

That is a pretty normal conversation for me to have at the park. That's part of why I find the old dude's behavior so baffling. That & more often you see the 'nice guy' or incel type behaviors in younger men. I'd say the oldest dudes with that mentality are generally early 40s & that's at the outside. Yeah there are weird outliers but like... dude just seemed far too old for that. It's unacceptable at any age, don't get me wrong. I was just referring to how common an occurrence it is in various age groups.

I dunno. Shit is gross & kinda scary.

[ DISCLAIMER: UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES DOES ANYONE HAVE PERMISSION TO REBLOG THIS POST. if you reblog, I will find you, I will send you a very abrasive rude message, & I will block you. Thanks! -Dumpster Fire Management ]

[harcourtholmesii]

Fragmented (Chapter II)

(Warnings: Depictions of Violence, Referenced Self-Harm, Potentially Uncomfortable Imagery and Referenced Nudity.)

THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS

‘DO YOU REMEMBER ME?’

 Remus would hardly consider the question or how it was phrased an issue. He had never been one to get offended, concerned or disgusted easily. Hell, he was the Duke after all, and all intrusive and mature thoughts were his domain. It took a lot to get to him.

 The question was not exactly threatening, and neither was the fact that Remus had seen this question drawn many times before. He had found it once in his sketch book after he had a mental blank, and once again, drawn into the dirt after he passed out from his failed invasion of Roman’s territory. No, he had never really been concerned with it.

 Not until now.

 He looked between the pair of scissors in his hands and the scratched message in his full-length mirror. It was cut deep into the glass, uneven and unnervingly cryptic. The scissors had been worn down to a blunt edge, Remus’ hands aching with strain. His hand was shaking, bruising and locking up from what he had apparently done. His mind had trailed off, lost in thought. It couldn’t have been too long, certainly not any more than a few seconds, but in that time he had all but blunted his scissors down to half their size, and marred a good portion of his already chipped mirror.

 Attempting to will away the writing proved fruitless, as it had been a mark made in their ‘physical’ Mindscape, and not something conjured. He just didn’t understand. Sure, Dee-Dee had been telling him he had been having some quiet episodes, where he seemed completely out of it. ‘Mindless’ and ‘highly suggestible’ was what Janus told him, and Remus trusted his scaled friend not to abuse this state.

 What was happening to him?

 Was he drunk? Could Sides even get drunk? He would have to test that theory. He was sure Logan would be proud of him for experimenting.

 His thoughts turned back to the writing on the mirror, and how his hand was outstretched towards it. He let his fingers gently trace the sharp abrasions in the glass surface, trying to just wrap his mind around it and what it was doing there in the first place. He had blissfully ignored all of the previous questions, scrapping the paper from his book and brushing the dirt away, but this wasn’t the same thing.

 Well, it could be gotten rid of. Smashing the mirror was not exactly off the table, but whatever was doing this, he wasn’t entirely certain if ignoring it was the best course of action. It shook him that he was even considering giving this… whatever, even a moment of thought, but he couldn’t just keep overlooking these episodes forever. What if it got worse? It would be cool to see what he would do next, but he didn’t want to wake up from an episode having carved the question into Janus’ face.

 He couldn’t be certain how long he was staring at the mirror, but it was long enough that Janus had deemed it a good idea to check on him. There was a polite knock on the door, Remus’ eyes turning to peer over at the chipped and stained wood of his door. Stains that probably should have been cleaned off a while ago added ‘character’, he would like to argue. Within the past few months though, with Janus making periodic trips to the Light side, Remus had felt the urge to do more for Janus, including cleaning his room and his door for him so the other wouldn’t be so disgusted upon entering.

 “Remus.” His smooth voice cut through the Duke’s mind, pulling his attention back to the other’s immediate presence outside the door. “Are you not alright? You’ve been in there for some time and I haven’t heard something smash yet.”

 He knew him too well.

 “I’m fine, Dee. Just…” He glanced back to his mess of a mirror, and the room surrounding him. He skipped over, leaping across his bed like a feline, landing in front of the door and opening it wide, being sure to put himself between Janus and the view of his mirror. Didn’t need to worry his poor head off! For good measure, he tucked the blunted scissors behind his back, their cold weight heavy in his hand.

 “I was just thinking.”

 “A dangerous pastime.”

 “I know.” He chuckled, returning the quote as easily as the other had started it. The two of them shared a smile, Remus feeling something in his shrivelled heart stir. It felt as if someone was playing his heartstrings like a fucking harp, plucking them ever so softly. He wondered if a heart like that would spray a small mist of blood every time it was plucked. He shook his head of the thought.

 “Can I help you with anything, J-Anus?” The other cringed at the use of the nickname, Remus biting the inside of his lip. That was probably not the best thing to say. Especially when the other had come looking for him out of concern.

 “I was wondering if you were okay… You entered one of your episodes a couple of minutes ago and I hadn’t heard much from you for a while. Thought I should check and make sure you did hurt yourself.”

 “Well, I’m fine so…” He trailed off, trying to encourage Janus to leave. He didn’t want the other gone, in fact he took some comfort in knowing the other cared, but he didn’t particularly wish to introduce Janus to what he had been doing during his episodes. He had no doubt it would freak the other out. And the other didn’t need the stress.

 “If you’re not sure…” Janus conceded, peering over the other with something akin to concern in his human features. The reptilian side looked as stoic as ever. “Well, I’m supposed to not go and see Patton and Logan about Thomas’ mental health. Will you be okay not on your own?”

 He knew it was in Janus’ nature to lie, little fibs and tricks slipping free from his lips even without his consent. But even that little fib had Remus on edge. He hated being left alone, always had ever since… But now, the idea that he wasn’t as alone as he thought caused a stir in his gut. It made him want to throw up, and he knew Janus wouldn’t like to have his shoes ruined. He swallowed down his bile, offering a wolfish grin that strained taut against his cheeks.

 “Of course! No need to worry about little ol’ me, Dee.” Remus forced himself to believe it. He wanted to believe it. He didn’t need Janus picking up on his lies. It seemed to work, Janus offering him a polite smile in return, and bowing his head ever so slightly. He turned, making his way down the corridor to the common room as to begin sinking out.

 Remus shut his door immediately, taking a minute to focus on his racing heart, eyes turning back to the mirror’s surface. Was there a poltergeist possessing him? No… Janus made him swear never to bring creations from the Imagination back into the Dark common room. Threatened him with the worst act of violence he could think of- a bath. Sure, Remus was hardly terrified of being in the buff, in fact he regularly forgot about wearing his clothes to the common room. Virgil’s horrified eyes and the urges Remus could feel Virgil had (something akin to gouging his eyes out with whatever cutlery was in hand) made him laugh aloud, whilst Janus’ obvious embarrassment made something warm tickle Remus’ heart.

 But a bath… Ew.

 Focus, Remus. Focus on the problem at hand.

 He rounded his bed, approaching the mirror once more, feeling how his entire form was trembling uncontrollably. They were just words! Why was he acting so terrified? He could feel a pressure behind his eyelids, burning and hot in the front of his brain. Like a thousand needles threading through his grey matter and piercing every nerve firing off in his skull. It felt familiar.

 He watched as his hand raised of its own accord, feeling his throat run dry. He took a breath, letting his body act on its own accord. He didn’t fight it. The hand raised and began carving, slow and deliberate, as if it had a mind of its own. The words were not as obviously defined in the glass once his hand returned to his side, but the message was still as clear as day.

 ‘YOU’RE SAFE WITH ME.’

 Somehow, Remus felt otherwise.

 ‘YOU’RE NOT ALONE ANYMORE.’

 He grit his teeth, hand on the scissors clenching so tight he could feel how his muscles were beginning to cramp up. He felt the urge to let go, and just as he relaxed, his hand rose again, reaching forward to scratch at the mirror.

 The sentence that had been etched there was nothing like the previous ones. It wasn’t as cryptic or obviously creepy, but this one hit him harder than any of the previous messages. He felt his whole world spinning, dizzily as his sight focussed in on the words that stared back at him. It wasn’t threatening, but it left Remus feeling scared. Even more so than his disturbed night terrors and horrific day-mares.

 ‘YOU KNOW ME, DON’T YOU?’

 He reached up to the crown of the mirror, forcefully pulling it to the floor, smashing it into a thousand pieces, glass spraying out over his carpet in a halo around it. Even now, it did little to kerb his fear. His hand relaxed, releasing the scissors and letting them fall to the floor. Something wet brimmed at the edges of his vision, Remus wiping it away as quickly as it came. Remus had never been one to cry. There was only one conclusion to this odd circumstance.

 Just like how those words were not his; these were not his tears.

[teatitty]

Logan and His Weird Brood of Endless Children (A Comprehensive List)

I promised to do it so here it is at last! Logan has had many children over the years (24 at least!) and all in different continuities. For the sake of this list, I’m only including the children that are canonically his own and not the people he only acted as a father/mentor for (so no Jubilee, Rogue, Kitty or Armor). 

Honorary mention goes to Laura’s clones (especially Gabby) because they are technically Logan’s children but were cloned from Laura specifically instead (you’d think they’d be Laura’s kids but they canonically viewed her as their sister. The only one still alive is Gabby Kinney).

So! I’m doing this list in alphabetical order and I am going to include which Continuity they appear in. This is just a brief run-down of their origins and not the full history otherwise we’d be here for years.

1: Amiko Kobayashi (Earth 616)

Amiko’s mother (unnamed) was killed during a giant dragons rampage through Tokyo. Logan promised her dying mother that he would take care of Amiko. He also held her mother through her dying moments. Because he was a full-time X-Man Logan was unable to look after her personally, so he fostered her with his wife Mariko Yashida instead. Amiko lived with Mariko for a few years, seeing Logan on rare occasions, and enjoyed the plush life-style that Clan Yashida gave her. 

She also met Kitty Pryde and went for ice-cream with her, Logan and Mariko. When Mariko was assassinated, no legal plan existed for Amiko’s care (why Marvel couldn’t have her move to the X-Mansion idk) and she ended up in the foster system. Logan thought that was fine, even sending money to help care for her, but discovered that her foster parents had been stealing the money. 

Taking her away from the situation, he gave guardianship over to Yukio. Honestly Amiko got kidnapped a lot to be used against him but at least she’s still alive! She has limited martial arts and, due to her lineage, it is possible that she could develop mystical abilities though nothing has been confirmed for her.

2: Avery Connor (Earth 616)

After Logan’s skeleton was bonded to adamantium, one Dr David Connor took some of Logan’s genetic material and implanted it into the child his wife, Veronica Connor, was pregnant with (okay. Creepy.) The result of this was Avery Connor, specifically “designed” so that her powers would manifest when she hit maturity (yikes) with the hope that she would be stronger then Wolverine. By age 14 she was able to recover from a gunshot wound to the chest in about a minute. She only appeared in the 3 issue novel “Elektra and Wolverine: The Redeemer” which you can find on Comicpunch.net if you want to know her full story.

3: Brian and Mari Logan (Earth 1298)

These two are put together because they’re twins! They appear in the very last arc of Mutant X (#28 onwards). During this time, Logan is believed to be dead but is, in fact, alive and currently only has fragmented memories (basic Logan stuff really.) Instinct drives him to the house he shared with his wife, Mariko Yashida (the twins’ mom). While there, he runs into Mari who asks him if he’s her dad, because “mommy said that daddy went to heaven but Brian says he’s going to come back to us someday.”

Creed kidnaps the family, Logan tracks them down and has a heartfelt proper reunion with them, even hugging Brian. Pretty much the only thing Logan cares about during this last arc is getting his family to safety which is, you know, fair enough tbh.

4: Cameron Pryde (Earth 25158)

Cameron is the son of Kitty Pryde and Piotr Rasputin. He was born shortly before the mutant control act, which led to all surviving mutants being locked up in camps (oof.) When Kitty was taken away by sentinels, Logan took Cameron to safety and raised him as his own son, training Cameron to be a hunter in the wilds of the Sentinel Territories. Cameron was 17 when he met Kitty and his younger sister, Christina, whom ended up killing him.

5: Daken Akihiro (Earth 616)

Daken is probably the most famous of all Logan’s children, right next to Laura. Putting a trigger warning here for bullying and one suicide.

Daken is the son of Logan and Itsu. In 1946, during the last moments of her pregnancy, Itsu was murdered by Winter Soldier (yea) in an attempt to lure out Logan and return him to Madripoor. Romulus cut Daken from her womb, which Daken survived due to his healing factor. Daken was left on the doorstep of Akihira and Natsumi, who took his arrival as an answer to their prayers and raised him as their own. He was given the name “Akihiro” but the servants and other families secretly called him “Daken” (bastard dog), a slur about his mixed heritage.

This harsh treatment caused him to develop a cold persona to everyone but Akihira. One night, Natsumi confessed to Akihira that she was pregnant and didn’t actually love Akihiro. Daken overheard this, and within a year of Junichiro’s birth (sometime in 1957 so Daken was 10-11), he confronted Natsumi and said he’d killed her son (this was true). Akihira disowned him, Daken said his real name wasn’t “Akihiro” and then Natsumi tried to run him through with a bayonet on the end of a rifle. This triggered Daken’s mutant powers, and he ended up accidentally slashing her down. Akihira committed suicide.

Romulus appeared and told Daken that he was what Daken would someday become. Romulus sent him to a training camp in Canada, the same one Logan had been trained in 40 years prior. Other stuff happens here but basically Romulus ends up telling Daken that Logan is his father and lies to his face, saying that Logan was the one who killed Itsu with Daken still inside her, which is why Daken hates Logan’s guts. In the following years, Romulus nurtured this hatred.

You can’t see it in the image above but Daken does have a third claw on the underside of each wrist.

6: Erista (Earth 616)

Literally Erista only appears once. His mom is Gahck of the Savage Lands Fire Tribe and the only time we see him is when Logan is leaving said Savage Lands.

7: Hudson Logan (Earth 982)

Hudson is Rina’s half-brother and was a member of the Revengers, who attacked the Avengers on more then one occasion. However, he switched sides to fight against Galactus and then asked to be an official Avenger. Though suspicious of his motives, they let him join as they needed help fighting Sylene, Loki’s daughter.

8: Hulk Jr/Bruce Banner Jr (Earth 807128)

Baby Banner was the newest addition to the Hulk Gang, and Bruce’s favourite among them. When Logan killed the entire gang (you’ll find out why in a little while), he felt it was poetic justice that Hulk Jr be the first member of his new team of heroes to help retake the country.

500 years into the future, Hulk Jr helped defeat Galactus, using him as a power source for a time machine. He and his team ended up on Earth 616 and the F4 convinced them all to go live on Nu-World instead. The last we see of him is on a rebuilt Galactus engine heading to a new world.

9: Jade and Scotty Logan (Earth 807128)

Jade and Scotty were born 50 years into the future, to Logan and Maureen. Logan owed the Hulk Gang rent money and went off to collect it. He returned 2 weeks early only to find that his family had been killed because the Hulk’s “got bored.”

10: James “Jimmy” Hudson Jr (Earth 1610)

James’ mom is Magda, who you will probably know as Magneto’s wife and the mother of Wanda and Pietro. Logan entrusted Jimmy to his war friend, James Hudson. His last name was changed from “Howlett” to “Hudson” to make the adoption official, and his mutant origins would be kept a secret until his highschool days. Jimmy grew up to be like Logan, with a taste for red-haired women (okay Marvel, sure), a reckless lifestyle and a feral personality. 

Unfortunately, Logan died before Jimmy could ever meet him. When Jimmy was drag-racing at 17 his car crashed and this is when he discovered he had a healing factor. His gf was disgusted by it and left him (ouch) and the next day he got a visit from Kitty Pryde. She told him he was Wolverine’s son, and gave him some of Logan’s old things, including his canadian dog tag (and a lock of Jean’s hair because god forbid Marvel let that go). 

A holographic message from Logan told Jimmy “you’re my son, dont ask about your mother, don’t focus on the past, be thankful the Hudsons raised you and learn to live with the choices you make” (paraphrasing of course). His last message to Jimmy was that he never regretted having a son. 

With Kitty’s encouragment, Jimmy found he had inherited Logan’s claws and formed a metallic coating over them. He would then seek out Jean, who helped him recruit other mutants.

He ended up bonded to a Symbiote eventually and now he goes by the alias Poison. Also he got rid of that dope beard and went with mutton-chops instead which, like, worst decision by far they hella look ugly on him.

11: Kendall Logan (Earth 9811)

Kendall’s mom is Ororo! She also has an unnamed baby brother! Kendall can manipulate the weather like Ororo and possesses a healing factor like Logan. She also has her father’s temper but her mother’s good attitude. She’s highly trained as a fighter and is as stealthy as an assassin. She was born in a universe where the Secret Wars never left Battleworld.

Due to various circumstances, Kendall and a bunch of other mutant kids ended up on an alternate earth where Sentinels ruled America. The kids then decided to stay here and wipe out the Sentinels.

12: Kirika Yashida (Earth 295)

In this reality, Logan and Mariko had a romance before the ascension of apocalypse. This romance led to the birth of Kirika. Logan was unaware of her birth and, after Japan’s destruction, joined the X-Men. Mariko joined the Human High Council and Kirika ended up the property of Sinister though how this happened is never stated. Magneto found her in a containment marked “X-23″ and was surprised when she unsheated her claws. 

Kirika ended up being trained by Magneto and was tasked with bringing her father back to America with her. Important note, but on this earth Logan is still going by “Weapon X”. A bunch of other shit happens, and Kirika ends up being killed by Weapon X with 616 Logan mourning her death as he holds her charred remains, right before he went feral and attacked his 295 counterpart.

13: Kouen (Earth 13119)

A teenage clone of Logan, Kouen was created by an unknown organization, who ordered him to kill Logan, who they believed was the missing link they needed to create the “perfect race.” Instead of doing that, however, Kouen chose to help Logan rather than kill him.

14: Laura Kinney (Earth 616 and Evolution/Earth 11052)

The second most well-known of Logan’s children! Her comic origins are a bit more convoluted then her origins in Evolution so I’ll talk about both. Personally, I prefer her origins in Evolution but, ya know. Prefences and all. 

I’m going to talk about her comic/616 origins first because it’s. A lot to get through and condense.

When Facility (yes that’s what the organization is called) failed to find a subject capable of surviving the bonding process of adamantium to bones (because they wanted to recreate the Weapon X program that made Logan), mutant geneticist Sarah Kinney was brought in to create a clone.

After 22 failed attempts of cloning, because they couldn’t find a Y Chromosome in the only bit of damaged genetic coding they had of Logan’s, Sarah proposed they make a female clone instead. Initially rejected, Sarah went and did it anyway, using her own genetic material to complete Logan’s. Dr Sutter was impressed but Dr Zander Rice claimed insubordination and forced Sarah to be the surrogate.

Laura spends 7 years training in the facility while Sarah tries to ensure that Laura retain some semblance of humanity. Rice had her subjected to radiation poisoning to acclerate her mutant gene growth and bonded her claws to adamantium. 

Other shit happens, she ends up being harshly trained (and punished) by Kimura, then 3 years later she got her first mission, was punished for not returning with Rice, ended up ordered to kill Sutter and his family and then she managed to kill Rice. Unfortunately Rice exposed her to “trigger scent” which sent her into a rage that killed Sarah. In her dying words, Sarah names her “Laura.”

Other stuff happens but I’m skipping it so fast-forward and Laura tracks Logan down to the x-mansion where she beats him in a fight. She tells him who she is, he says he already knows cuz he got a letter from Sarah telling him the whole story (??? okay sure) but before they can have a proper talk Steve Rogers arrests her. 

She gets interrogated by Steve and Matt Murdoch. Matt claims she’s innocent given her backstory, but Steve wants her to atone for her murders. Ultimately, Steve frees her so she doesn’t get exploited by SHIELD as a weapon.

Laura joins the X-Men and immediately gets protective over Logan, even following him on missions.

Now for Evolution/11052 canon which is way fucking easier to get through! 

Logan learns through SHIELD that Dr Deborah Risman, working for HYDRA, managed to create a female clone of him after 22 failed attempts. Her only codename was X-23. (She doesn’t get the name Laura in the cartoon but that might be cuz it was cancelled before the last season.)

Denied a normal childhood, X23 was lonely (seriously you actually see her hugging teddy bears in Kitty’s room and getting jealous over how happy the X-Men teens are). She’d never had a companion, spending most of her time honing her skills under observation.

She breaks into the X-Mansion, defeating the other X-Men, and eventually confronts Logan. Logan refuses to fight back against her, spending his time trying to talk to her instead. X23 lashes out, screaming “everything I am is because of you!”

Logan eventually catches her wrists, telling her he’s the one person who understands what she went through, and admits he had no idea about what they did to her. When X23 breaks down in his arms, Logan hugs her back, saying he’s the closest thing she has to family.

When SHIELD shows up to take her in, Logan tells her to run for it. Laura hesitates, not wanting to leave him (you can tell by her face) but Logan repeats the order. She leaves and Logan tells Fury to leave her alone because she’s been through enough.

(Also fun note, the reason Laura is white in the comics and not brown is bc they wanted her to look “more like Logan” apparently).

15: Mongrels (Earth 616)

Led by Gunhawk (William Downing, one with the bandana), the Mongrels team consists of Fire Knives (redhead girl), Shadowstalker (purple girl), Cannon Foot (the big boy) and Saw Fist (green mask), all children of Logan’s from various different mothers. Put together by The Red Right Hand, these mercs all have a hatred for Logan though it’s never explained why, and wanted to cause him as much pain as possible. During their final fight with him, Logan manages to kill them all but is devastated to learn they were, in fact, his children. 

He ends up burying them with their respective mothers.

16: Raze Darkholme (Earth 13729)

Raze’s mom is Mystique, whom he killed and replaced some time in the future. His claws are really short and he uses shapeshifting to make them longer (lol). His shape-shifting is supposedly stronger then Mystique’s. The first time we see him, he’s impersonating Kitty Pryde in order to get close to Logan and strike him down. 

Raze has an older half-brother, whose father is Xavier (yes really). Raze wants to kill the entire human population, and bring all persecuted mutants from the multiverse into one place to create a mutant paradise. This plan is ultimately stopped by an alt earth’s Phoenix.

17: Reine du Rien (Earth 616)

Reine (pronounced “ren”) is a french sorceress and I think she’s also half-romani. She has Logan’s healing factor and claws, which glow a faint blue, and her clans magic. Her mother, Sylvie, had a one-night stand with Logan in the 60′s specifically to create Reine so that their clan would have an immortal child capable of killing a demon called “Truth” so they wouldn’t have to rely on Logan anymore.

As per usual, Logan didn’t know about her. In 1989 Logan tracked down her hometown but was told to fuck off by her aunt because he wasn’t needed anymore. Unfortunately, he caught Reine’s scent and, not one to let things go, kept trying to talk to her whenever he happened to see her. In 2008, Reine finally confirmed she was his daughter and said her clan didn’t think she needed a name, but began calling her Reine which meant “nothing.” (Oof.)

After explaining that it wasn’t her he was trying to hunt, but Truth, Logan and Reine crossed their claws and promised to kill Truth together, thus setting them both free.

18: Rina Logan (Earth 982)

So! Rina’s mother is Elektra! She’s a skilled martial artist and gymnast. Her claws are made of psychic energy! She used to get bullied at school for being the child of an immigrant and unemployed biker, but then opinion changed when everyone saw Logan pick her up from school and learned that her mom was a wealthy martial arts master (lol get fucked). Rina is canonically a daddy’s girl, and a lot of heroes give her a wide berth because she’s considered as dangerous as Logan is. 

[aingealcethlenn-archive]

Take A Drive

Characters - Reader, Sam, Dean

Pairing - None really

Summary/Request - When Y/N goes on a hunt alone and things go south, the Winchesters must not only save her from the monsters trying to kill her, but also make her realize what she’s doing, or else they could risk losing her for good.

Word Count - ~3313

Warnings - Angst, Language, Mentions of violence, Mentions of death/near death, Suicidal actions, Depression (If you spot any other warnings I should add, please let me know so I can edit this post to include them!)

A/N - Based on the Nick Alligood song “Take A Drive”

Tags (Want on or off? Send a message/ask or add yourself here) -  Redoing my Tag List...feel free to add yourself HERE

Story - 

It had been a rough few weeks lately... …Oh, who am I kidding. It had been a terrible few weeks.

Anything that could possibly go wrong, did. Any petty monster, demon, or creepy-crawly piece of shit that could rear its fugly head, did.

This last hunt, though? Was what finally did me in. I let the sleepless nights, the countless hours on the road, the pure, raw, emotion take me over - more like bash me over the head with a brick.

I was sick of these… these… things trying to take my family from me.  Sick of seeing my boys hurt.  Sick of having to mend bones, clean cuts, stitch up gashes. 

It wasn’t that these monsters were difficult in and of themselves, but for some unknown reason they were working together recently, and that just made it a sheer numbers advantage.

The hunt last week was different though; I was pissed off. This time? These freaks were messing with me. And I’d be damned if I let them take me without a fight.

Sure, I knew better than to take off alone - it was a suicide mission and I knew it -  but that wasn’t going to stop me this time. I walked into that nest with one thing on my mind. Take out the enemy before they took me out.

I wasn’t expecting a group of demons to be watching the nest though. Vampires are tough enough to catch off guard, let alone kill; especially an entire nest of them. Throwing in a twist like this was just going to make it that much tougher.

I got through though. Took out a few demons, and was able to cause enough of a distraction elsewhere to take the attention of the rest of them away from the nest.

Once inside - well that’s when things got difficult. I was only able to take out three of those bloodsuckers before I was ambushed.

I hadn’t been given any blood, so there was no worry there. They didn’t want to turn me, they wanted me dead. Drained of blood so there was no possibility of survival.

Lucky for me, Sam and Dean realized I was missing and figured out my plan quick enough. Nevertheless, by the time they arrived I was pretty far gone.

Now it was their turn to take care of me. Their turn to nurse me back to health.

With a little help from witchcraft - bless those bitches and their spells…sometimes it wasn’t such a bad thing to have Rowena around - I was back to myself in a matter of days.

Despite the ordeal that went down - the near-death experience and all - it didn’t stop Dean from speaking his mind once I was finally well enough to deal with it.

Seeing me sitting in the library when he returned from a liquor run, seemed like a good starting point for him. “What were you thinking Y/N?” Dean bellowed, throwing his jacket over a chair, directly over top my own.

Knowing exactly what he was talking about, I didn’t even bother looking up. “I was thinking, how I was tired of mending you two up. How those stupid creatures keep attacking in swarms. How, instead of laying low like they would normally do, things have been flipped on their head and they don’t give two shits about being caught anymore. I was thinking…”

“You weren’t thinking at all about the consequences though, were you?” he interrupted. “Didn’t stop to think what it might be like for Sam and me if we didn’t get there in time, huh?”

“Dean… I…” I let out a heavy sigh. “No. You know what?” I stood from the chair I’d been seated in, “I thought about all of that. And then I pushed it out of my head and did what I had set out to do. I killed things last week that had taken innocent lives. I pulled myself together and used all that damn pent up aggression I was harboring, and I killed those damn monsters!”

“Do you not understand that we could have lost you, Y/N?” His tone was still hard, but I could see the pain in his eyes. “If Sam & I hadn’t -”

“Did you ever stop to think, maybe I didn’t want you to save me?” Dean’s face dropped ever so slightly at my words. I could tell they stung, but they hurt me even worse. “No matter what I do, I seem to continue coming in last. I can’t drown the past anymore… it’s learned how to swim. I can’t… I can’t close my eyes at night, without my troubles seeping in and turning my dreams into nightmares.” I couldn’t hide the emptiness in my voice.

“So, what you’re saying, is you wanted to get caught. You wanted to go into that nest of vampires, and never come back out. Is that what I’m getting?” The voice I heard falling from his lips was one I had never heard from Dean before. He sounded… guilty.

“That’s not what I said Dean. Of course I didn’t want to get caught.” I was irritated by this conversation. I was scared. I was… I don’t know what I was anymore.

“Then I guess I don’t -” he started before I interrupted him abruptly.

“I just don’t want to feel anything anymore Dean. Okay? Is that clear enough for you to follow?” I snapped.

Turning on my heels, storming off to my room, roughly pushing past Sam as he made his way to check on what all the commotion was about, slamming the door once I was inside.

I leaned back against the door, sighing quietly as I slid down to the floor, listening to the muffled sounds of Sam and Dean discussing what just happened.

I didn’t mean to snap at Dean, it just happened. Sometimes I just couldn’t shut that switch off once it’s been flipped.

It wasn’t long before I heard Dean’s footsteps coming down the hall. Standing from my spot on the floor I changed into an oversized t-shirt and some shorts, hoping some rest will help improve my mood. As I crawl into bed, I hear Dean’s door close, and silence engulfs the bunker, and more specifically, my bedroom.

After lying in silence for what seemed like an eternity, unable to sleep, I leave my bed and put on a fresh pair of clothes. Knowing the brothers are fairly light sleepers, I’m careful to stay as quiet as possible. Clicking my door open, I step through the threshold into the hall before carefully clicking it closed once more and heading toward the main areas.

Dean had left his jacket draped over the chair in the library. When I picked it up in an attempt to get my own coat, figuring if I couldn’t sleep I might as well take a drive, it felt heavy. Seems Dean left the keys for the car - and the bunker - in his jacket pocket.

This wasn’t typical of him, he always kept his stuff in his room. It was just another thing that told me the events of last week had rattled him as much as they had me. We just each had very different ways of dealing with things.

It had been a long time since I had driven Baby. She used to be my escape when I needed to clear my head.

Smirking to myself as I recalled the times I would carefully fish the keys out of Dean’s discarded clothes, and tip-toe out of the different motel rooms to sit in the silence that Baby offered.

The times I would put the keys in the ignition, and start her up to hear that purr of her engine; sometimes taking her for a short drive, only to make it back minutes before the sun - and the brothers - would be up for the day.

Nonetheless, now that we had the bunker, and a garage full of cars, I had my pick of what to use. I didn’t see the sense in trying to sneak the keys to drive Dean’s car anymore when I could just as easily take another.

But, considering the circumstances, I felt the need to take the Chevy out for a drive. Call it sentimental, call it cheesy, call it whatever you want, but there was something about that car that could calm my rattled nerves and silence the monsters I carried with me in my own head better than anything else in this world.

Taking the keys from the pocket, I forgot all about my jacket and took off for the garage, as quietly as possible. 

With the roar of the engine, I was thankful the garage was far away from the rooms so there was no chance in them hearing me leave.

I threw the car in drive and took off for the open road. I had no destination in mind; I was headed nowhere, but I was headed there fast.

After a bit of mindless cruising - you know the type, when your mind goes blank and you zone out completely, only to come to and wonder how the hell you’re still alive and have no idea how you arrived at where you are - I finally engaged myself and started to focus, finding myself stopped on the side of a lonely road.

Dean rolled out of bed, unable to sleep after what happened between Y/N and himself earlier. Thinking, maybe trying to apologize was the best thing he could do to ease his mind.

Making his way to Y/N’s room, he felt a ping in the pit of his stomach. Something telling him to worry. Ignoring it, he opened Y/N’s door slowly.

“Y/N? You awake?” he offered in a whisper.

When he didn’t hear a response, he opened the door farther to at least check on her. Seeing her bed empty, he suddenly realized something may actually be wrong.

He made his way quickly to the main rooms of the bunker, checking everywhere he would expect her to be. Finding her nowhere, Dean made his way to Sam’s room to wake him.

Knocking on Sam’s door, he doesn’t wait for a response. Throwing the door open, he yells for his brother.

“Sammy! Wake up! Y/N is missing!”

“What?” Sam’s voice is full of worry and sleep, having been woken so abruptly.

“Y/N… is… missing!” He restated slowly. 

“She couldn’t have gone far Dean.” Sam tried to reassure. “Did you check the garage?” he offered, rubbing his eyes, still trying to wake up completely.

“The garage?” Dean questioned. Sam nodded in reply. “Why would I check the garage, Sam? She’s a person, not a car.”

“Because, Dean, Y/N tends to sit in one of the cars when she can’t sleep.”

I ran my hands over the steering wheel, feeling the smooth leather against my skin. The road in front of me was wide open, and in this small, map dot town, I knew I wouldn’t have to worry about cops, or even other drivers for that matter, out this late at night.

I may have been feeling lost, caught up in all the insanity that goes along with this life, but tonight? Tonight, I was going to find myself again. Forget the troubles, forget the insanity, forget the past; at least for a brief time.

I reached across the seat and lowered the passenger window. Once I was back in my spot, I lowered my window as well before pushing the gas pedal slowly to the floor, and listening to the engine purr as it moved increasingly faster down the road.

This was my therapy. This was my comfort zone. The open road. The engine roaring.

When the Chevy hits about 85, is when I truly feel alive again. The breeze rolling in, washing over me as if it were washing my sins away, being baptized by the open road.

Breathing in that sweet Kansas atmosphere, the speakers bumping to some upbeat country music - of course, I’d never tell Dean his baby played anything but his rock tapes - rolling on for miles at a time.

“SAAAAMMMM!!” Dean’s voice carried throughout the bunker. Within a couple minutes, Sam appeared in the doorway to the garage. “It’s gone Sam!”

“What’s gone Dean?” He made his way to where his brother stood.

“She took...my car!”

“I’m right here Dean, you really don’t need to yell anymore.” Sam rolled his eyes at his brother. “Look, why don’t I try to call her and see where she is?”

Dean didn’t respond. He appeared to be hyperventilating at the knowledge of someone else driving his beloved vehicle. 

“Go… Go sit down.” He clapped his hand on his brother’s shoulder, “I’ll get your car back.”

I don’t know how long I had been driving. Hell, I don’t even completely know where I am. All I really knew, was that I needed to top off the car if I had any intent on making it back to the bunker.

As I pull into the gas station, and up to the pump, I hear my phone vibrating on the seat. I didn’t care who it was, or what they wanted, so I ignored it.

Climbing out, I opened the door for the gas tank and removed the cover. I knew I couldn’t put the cheap gas in Baby’s tank, so I filled her up with the premium stuff. Once the gas cap was back on, I sat back in her seat and looked at my phone.

3 missed calls. All from Sam. Just as I was about to clear them all from my screen, his name appeared again. No sense ignoring it again.

“What is it, Sam?” I said abruptly, as soon as the screen had shown the call starting.

“Where are you Y/N? I’ve called you three times already. We’re worried about you.” 

“No, you’re not. Dean is worried about his precious car, that’s all.” I snidely replied.

“You know that’s not true.” I laughed a little at Sam’s attempt to make me feel significant. “I mean, sure he is worried about the car, but we’re more worried about you.” Sam’s voice was remorseful. “A car can be replaced Y/N, you can’t.”

“Sam, I appreciate the concern, but -”

“But nothing Y/N.” His tone had rapidly changed from concerned to frustration, “I don’t know what’s got your thoughts so warped right now, but whatever it is, we need to figure out how to make it stop. You know we care about you. You know we’d risk everything for you. So why are you so hell-bent on self-destructing?” 

“I’m not - “ I tried to start again.

“You are though,” he interrupted. “Drinking full bottles of whiskey in a night, thinking no one notices. Trying to take on an entire nest of vampires alone. Now you’re out, who knows where, alone, and couldn’t even be bothered to let one of us know you were taking off? How is any of that not being self-destructive?”

Sam had a point. Maybe he’s right. I was doing things that were dangerous, without so much as a second thought about the outcome. 

“Just… come home Y/N. Please? Let’s figure this out together.” I could hear the worry in his voice. “Before something worse happens…”

“Okay, Sam.”

“Thank you,” he let out a sigh, “I’ll calm Dean down while we wait for you.”

I hung up the phone, turned the key and headed back toward the bunker. There was no telling what would happen when I arrived, what may be said, or how anyone would react, but I had to at least give them a chance. 

After a long, quiet drive back, I pulled into the garage and shut off the engine. Sitting in the silence for a moment, I tried to gather my thoughts before making the walk inside.

Finding the brothers sitting in the library, I took a seat opposite of them and just waited. 

“What the hell were you thinking?!” Dean barked out. “No one drives that car but me! I don’t even let Sam drive her!” 

I toss the keys at him, “she’s fine Dean. Not a single scratch, and I even topped her off before getting here. The only thing she’s got is a few more miles on her, and I didn’t hear her complain at all.”

“That’s not the -” he cut himself off, running a hand down his face, “forget it.”

“What he means to say Y/N,” Sam glared at his brother before looking to me, “is are you okay?”

“I’m fine Sam,” I replied flatly.

“Why did you take off like that? You should have at least -”

“I needed a break, Sam. That’s it.” I leaned back in the chair, crossing my arms over my chest and just watching each of them.

“And that break required my car?” Dean growled again.

“Required it? No. I’m sure I could have accomplished the same thing taking any one of those other cars,” I smirked a little as I saw his eyes narrow, “but, I can’t say I would have come back as easily if I had taken any other one.”

“What do you mean Y/N? What’s going on? Let us help you…” Sam offered, his last word a soft whisper of a request, “please?” 

“There’s nothing to help Sam. I’m fine. I’m just…” my face dropped. I leaned forward, resting my arms on my knees, running my hands over my face slowly.

I didn’t see the shift in Dean. Seeing the hunched over state I was in, and hearing the defeat in my voice, something clicked for him. He questioned himself how he had missed it, beating himself up a little inside as he finally recognized the state I was in. One he had been in himself, and probably would have never escaped from had it not been for his brother.

“I’m just…” I tried again, “I’m tired of trying to look happy and act normal for you two because the truth is… I’m not. I haven’t been for a while now. But I just can’t… I don’t have the strength to tell anyone, you know?” I looked between the brothers, hoping they would understand what I was trying desperately to convey.

“Look, Y/N, you know it’s okay, right?” Dean questioned, his voice finally soft, forgetting about the car and focusing on me.

“Nothing about this is okay, Dean… That’s the problem.” I rested my arms on my legs, crossed on my lap as I continued to lean forward, taking interest in the speck of dirt I had found on the floor. Anything to avoid their eyes.

“You’re wrong,” he said flatly, “It’s okay to feel the way you do.” Dean stepped closer, kneeling down in front of me, lifting my head slightly to look into my eyes. “To feel like the whole world is about to collapse on top of you, and in some way, you want that more than anything. Because it means all the pain will finally be over. But at the same time, you’re terrified of what would happen if it did.” I could tell by the sincere tone of his voice that he was speaking from experience.

“Who-Who are you again?” I smirk, “The Dean I know has never been that profound with me before.”

“You’re not alone in this fight Y/N. The one here in the real world, or the one in that beautiful head of yours. Sam and I,” he looked back at his brother for a brief moment before returning his gaze to me, “we’re here for you sweetheart. In any way, you need us to be.”

I smiled, looking up at Sam before returning my gaze to Dean, “what would I do without you two?” I chuckled.

“Survive Y/N. Just like always.” Sam smiled in return.