#you're no activist or feminist you're just a bully

[theanagyakaari]

When you call atul subhash weak for committing suicide you're also calling women who committed suicide due to abuse weak btw

[velvetvexations]

There's a post going around about how it doesn't help bring men to the left to treat being a man as an ontological evil. Lots of people were recommending bell hooks and it made me so happy because this is what trans men have been saying since forever.

But then my dash was full of people complaining about "that post that says if women were nicer misogyny wouldn't exist." I've seen "if you can't take a little teasing about your privilege you're weak" which just reminds me of mean girl behavior. If they had ever been bullied you think they'd realise how quickly "just teasing" can turn into downright cruelty, even if the target "deserves" it (which I'm sure the bullies thought they did!) I've seen "men are celebrated everywhere" not disabled men, not men of color, not trans men, and even the average cis white dude isn't going to feel celebrated for his manhood, because he's probably not the "alpha" other men say he should be. He's going to be defensive if that's dismissed because of "cis white man" and actually meeting him where he's at will get him to understand quicker than just telling him he's weak (I've had this explained to me by actual feminist activists).

And NONE of that is is saying women should just lay down and take intentional bigotry. But borderline radfem keyboard warriors don't want nuance, they want to be angry.

It makes me want to crawl in a hole again.

I will drag you out of that hole, anon. You're a man and it's awesome you're man. I love you. <3

[heyftinally]

And let me tell you, I don’t care about Kim Kardashian and her clan but for Taylor to revive an 8 years old beef about her when that woman has already divorced Kanye and mentioning her kids (who are CHILDREN!) is so immature. And the line of “my mom is a saint but she wishes you were death” might you this is a mother that hasn’t spoken your name in YEARS. Swifties be celebrating this then at the same breath paint her as a female activist. This isn’t Taylor coming on top, she’s pathetic and the only reason she’s bringing this drama again is because she’s planning on releasing her reputation recordings next and she’s getting her fans all ready and bothered to do the bullying for her. She’s an opportunist, uses her fan base for her battles and she loves the parasocial attachment her fans have for her and her private life.

Oh you're spot on there. Taylor brings up old beef like a high school mean girl who won't let go of your elementary/middle school awkward phase or screw up. And going after CHILDREN to serve as fodder for her petty squabble is just completely out of line. Most people in entertainment at least respect that rule - no matter how much beef you have with someone, their kids are off limits. Taylor has no such class.

She's absolutely an opportunist, though. That's why she never tells her fans off, even when they're sending literal death threats and spamming random people with racist and homophobic harassment. Because so long as she condones their shifty behavior, her loyal little clone drones will bully whoever Taylor even vaguely dislikes. All she has to do is vague tweet about someone, and her minors descend on them like vultures.

And honestly? She's created such a negative name for herself that unless she's fueding with someone or breaking up with someone, she has nothing to write about. Because nobody who actually does anything with their life/fame wants to hang out with her. So she's dredging up old fights because she's out of ideas, and can't let go of a grudge. She has to be the victim all the time, and because she's always the victim, any time she claps back if "obviously" justified. In her mind, anyway.

She's out of ideas, so she's going to bully another woman (real feminist of her, huh?) over a years-old feud just to get her kicks. It's honestly just embarrassing.

[butchhazard]

Nah you're right, I've seen a lot of similarities between fat activists and TRAs. There are many fat activists not only spreading misinformation but also straight up posting fetishist content like shaking and grabbing their bellies on tiktok. Which you wouldn't notice its a fetish thing normally so doing that shit on an app full of kids? I dont believe youre advocating for the supposed rights of fat people if you're making content for the deprived fetishes of your male audience. It benefits you economically to make the most outrageous claims about being fat bc it attracts men to your OF. I dont doubt a lot of what you see its ragebait for that reason.

Literally… it’s really disturbing imagining a young girl finding this community online after experiencing bullying and harassment for being overweight & finally thinking she’s found acceptance… meanwhile she’s actually being groomed into starting a self-harming OF filled with fat fetish content… 

I’ve witnessed too many women start posting this content in the name of “empowerment” and “fat people are allowed to feel sexy too.” Meanwhile some man is cumming to the idea of you being so heavy you’re completely immobile to the point where you can’t even get out of bed and rely on him for absolutely everything. This movement *is* dangerous to women. And the fetish aspect is there by design, the original NAAFA was started in 1969 by a “fat admirer” who legit just wanted to be around BBW. Just like TIFs these insecure women are very easy targets for manipulative men. 

I think feminists are scared to address the issue bc there’s so much morality tied to our appearances/weight/etc and the idea of normalizing diverse body types outside the rail-thin model norm is obviously a good one! But stuffing yourself to the point of 300lbs and immobility is not a “celebration of diversity” and it’s insane to think of it as one. Andrea Dworkin (who died young from an enlarged heart) said that self defense for women begins at the cessation of self-harm and imo that includes respecting yourself enough to actually care about your physical health. Especially in a world where women’s health is neglected, understudied, and barely a concern. More feminists need to be promoting these ideas WHILE endorsing body neutrality and acceptance bc otherwise these women are going to continue to be led astray by fetishists in sheep’s clothing. The only mainstream “critique” of fat positivity/HAES are people bullying and harassing these women for being fat. Like of course they’re going to be more attracted to the crowd of people preaching your belly is sexy…

[brothermoth]

Does this sound familiar? This is fucking segregation. This is an absolutely vile way to talk about fucking children. I'm sorry but this is not fucking feminism. This woman supports motherfucking segregation as an attempt to help girls "reach their full potential". Separate but equal, right?

I went to a coed public school. Never once was I or any of my friends assaulted or harassed by boys in that environment (not saying it doesn't happen, don't you twist my fucking words), but I and at least six of my friends were sexually harassed and even assaulted by girls. I was excluded and bullied not by boys, but by other girls in my classes and groups.

This is not how you protect girls. This is how you shame and silence victims of abuse by telling them women cannot be perpetrators. The reblogs and comments ALL dismiss victims of abuse. Single sex schools are classist, first of all, and do not provide equal education to their students. All single sex school in the states are private. Private schools cost money and provide a more rigorous education, that is not a hard statistic to find.

You are anti equality so blinded by your hatred for men you're willing to hobble the equality that actual fucking useful feminists fought for. The goal is to get women and men performing at the same level, and having the same opportunities. Not separation. That's not right. This is not right. Your ideas are absolutely fucking bullshit and you have no actual methods for providing safe environments for girls. Why don't you push for more concrete laws to protect students who seek out help after an assault? Single sex schools required a loosening of Title IX laws, you know, the ones that say there should be no discrimination on the basis of sex?

This is not activism. You are not an activist if you cannot uplift EVERYONE in your community, not just hand holding women and girls like they're incapable of breaking barriers without being put into a separate category from men.

[rametarin]

I can promise you, nothing has changed.

They may make it sound like you're on the edge of some sort of white people hate crime revolt, but it is, in fact, absolutely absurdly LESS likely than any other time in American history, and it has always been an extremely miniscule prospect since post-WW2.

If ever there were going to be mass violent riots about race and civil rights, it would've happened when the KKK was at its most powerful, or during neo-Nazi rallies throughout the 50s and 60s. It never happened to anywhere near the extent they suspected it might, because people in general aren't like that.

The number of hate groups and people plunged considerably in the 80s and 90s, as the older generations born in the early 1900s died off and those younger aged out of being healthy or angry enough to bother, and the new bigots not being numerous or angry enough to be of any threat- also, American intel keeping an eye on hate groups.

They're going to cite the "massive swing towards the right" and the "reactionary hate group responses to LGBTQ+ rights." Except.. no. They're going to cite a thing called Gamergate, and try to make it sound like these poor put-upon feminist activists got bullied and harassed by a bunch of male chauvinists just trying to "keep women out of videogames" and other eyeroll worthy shit. It's lies. They waged a finger-wagging campaign in the 2010s when the ideologues infested games journalism rags and started putting out puff pieces on how Gamers were what was wrong with gaming, how Gamers needed to lower their expectations of videogames and choose games that had "Good Messaging" and put down games the journos felt, "didn't have the best of messages," and started rating games based on how close to their ideology they were, not based on their quality or fun.

When they got blowback from that, they waged a big media campaign about how all these "cishet white male gamers" were "JOINING THE ALT-RIGHT" over "GIRLS IN 'THEIR' VIDEOGAMES." Except.. no. that is not even close to reality. It's just narrative. It's not even remotely a half-truth. Video gaming has always been equal opportunity and welcoming of female protagonists, whether they're butch and offputting, sporty and friendly, or just straight up princesses in all senses of the word. They were making out these extremely liberal, tolerant and accepting gamers as just being extensions of "the white supremacist patriarchy," and trying to make young people think THAT was the status quo, and that if anybody disagreed with their ideological nonsense, it was just white supremacism lashing out.

So after smearing people that disagreed with their ideological takes, it was like a bomb went off (metaphorically) in journalism, with every outlet talking about how "the alt-right was on the rise," making it seem like it was turn of the century KKK member numbers or something.

But at the same time, they were running around antagonizing people, repeating shit like, "All white people are racist, racism is something that is only possible if you are white. White women use their feminine white fragility to shield and absolve themselves from association with whiteness, and cannot be considered oppressed anymore by their whiteness."

Their takes are absurd, their faith is bad, and they're growing increasingly desperate to paint everybody that ISN'T part of the Progressive platform as just a bunch of woman hating, queerbashing, white supremacist, male chauvinist, cisheteronormatist, religious fundamentalist, ablist monsters.

So naturally when 1/5th of all black people vote for Donald Trump, a good portion of Latinos, instead of seeing anything right of Mao or Stalin as Hitler incarnate, they start screaming about how they're being "tricked by the alt-right."

You can EXPECT they'll make an enormous mess of trans rights on a state and federal level, I think, but wax on, wax off. Next presidential election, or the one after, it can be put back on the table. There's still gay rights. They're not going to round up and imprison people for being transgendered. They're not going to let hate mobs run around burning down black neighborhoods- especially not after ANTIFA and BLM did enough of that during 2018 and 2019.

We're very quietly already in World War III, economically, and have been for some time. This has been out of Obama, Biden and Trump's hands, largely. Don't look under the hood if you want to sleep better. It's being handled, but there will be turbulence. So, strap yourself in.

As someone who was busy being a pre-teen last time trump was president, I am extremely unsure what to expect.

[femsolid]

Can you please explain why you don't believe that trans women are women? I consider myself a feminist and a strong ally of the LGBTQ+ community, and my own sibling is nonbinary. I make it a point to be accepting, compassionate, and sympathetic towards every identity I come across because doing otherwise has made me miserable. Not because I received hate for not doing so (I got none, at all), but because I began to realize over time that excluding certain people in lieu of supporting others began to feel wrong and counterproductive. I took a look and saw that people who bullied me, who made me feel like an other for my appearance and mannerisms and despised my existence, would do the same to trans women, trans men, nonbinary people, and every other kind of person they didn't understand. When I interacted with people and groups that didn't believe there was more than two genders was such an overlap, such a rabbithole, that went down the path that hated feminism and by extension LGBTQ+.

What I'm trying to say is, even though I can't lie and say I DON'T despise terfs or that I DON'T hate transphobia, I want to be able to understand what leaves you stuck in an ideology I had to grow out of in middle school in order to be happier.

This little juvenile introspection seems to imply that I am a bigot who doesn't like people because they are different than me. I suppose that's what men told you about the big bad wolf they call "terfs". What does the F in terf mean? Ah, yes, Feminist. I am a feminist. So even as you label me a "terf" you are acknowledging that I am a feminist. Therefore my political views on gender ideology have nothing to do with hating people who are different and everything to do with feminism. I do not agree with being called a terf, by the way, but apparently only men get to choose their "identities".

If you're a feminist yourself, why do you think it's okay for people to chant "kill all terfs" knowing that it means that a certain group of feminists must be executed? Does that not seem a tiny bit strange to you? You don't see radical feminists chanting "kill all liberal feminists" do you? Despite the fact that we find you incredibly harmful and hardly feminist. I don't despise you and I don't want you dead. Yet you claim to be the "compassionate" and "accepting" one.

I don't think you know much about feminism and that's fair enough you're still young. But mostly, feminism was kept far away from your generation and instead you learned that people were walking "identities" making free personal choices that should never be questionned. Goddess forbid you try to change things or have a political opinion. Individualism over class consciousness.

So here you are. You saw a post I made about trans activists bullying a feminist to the breaking point (hospitalization), you came here to defend them and have the audacity to claim that you are against bullying? Every day the men you call women send rape threats to women, describe in graphic details how they want to rip us appart, attack us during feminist protests against male violence, send us pornographic pictures, call us misogynistic slurs and you think you've got the moral high ground for siding with these monsters? Do you never even question it? Do you not realize that the minute you step out of line they'll treat you the same? Or do you simply turn a blind eye on all of this and truly believe that the men who claim to be women are precious little victims oppressed by the evil feminazis who just hate them because they wear dresses? How stupid do you think we are? We know what bullying feels like, we know what discrimination is, how could we not? We are women after all. Mostly lesbian, bisexual, gender non conforming women. And survivors of prostitution, pornography, domestic abuse, rape, ableism, racism, child abuse and so on. We are women and we are feminists. We know full well what persecution feels like.

Now I can tell you why I think men are not women:

I do not believe in this religious dichotomy between mind and body. I don't think there's your body, and then there's your real self, separated from the real tangible world. We are bodies. Your body is you. Everything you feel, everything you think, everything you know is through your body. That's all that you have, that's all that you are and that's a perfectly acceptable situation. I don't believe in gendered minds, gendered souls, gendered spirits, gendered essences or gendered identities. I don't think that if you believe hard enough that you are of the opposite sex you then become it. I think gender ideology is a spiritual belief. I think it requires blind faith on your part to see a man, to know it's a man and yet to claim it's a woman, though you're most likely pretending to believe it just to spare his feelings, which are oh so easily hurt, conveniently.

I think the idea that white american men are martyrs oppressed by women is a joke. I think they promote sexist stereotypes and are misogynists. I don't think "I always knew I was a girl because even as a child I would play with dolls and make-up" is a progressive statement, do you? I think it's appalling that if you tell a man to stop the mansplaining, to stop oppressing women, to get the hell out of women's space, all he has to do is claim not to be a man, to be "non binary" and then you have to shut your mouth and crawl under his feet. I think well meaning people, who want to appear progressive and compassionate, are feeding an anti-feminist backlash. I think in reality you are encouraging gender non conforming people to feel like we are inadequate and need to change our bodies in order to fit in or we'll kill ourselves, according to you. I think you are encouraging an obsession with image and perfection. I think you are pushing kids into the arms of unscrupulous cosmetic surgeons, therapists and doctors who will gladly fuck up their health and diagnose them as trans for not conforming to sexist stereotypes or for being homosexuals. I think you should listen to destransitioners. I think you should stop letting men define womanhood, define feminism, define what you should think or say, define which women are good and which women are witches that must be hunted down. I think if men applaud your feminism then there is a problem. I think if white american men become the center of your activism while women and girls are massacred for their sex worldwide then your activism is worthless.

[mcl-alloveragain]

CHALLENGE — Creating OC using a playlist

Hello again!!! Today is something different from my usual content, but @marchiveeee (thank you btw!!!<3) has challenged me to do this and I just love this type of things, so I couldn't resist akajjsjxj

Since this blog is MCL related, let's just pretend this OC is for one of LI lololol

I also had some troubles with choosing a playlist i will shuffle, but since I'm a huge ✨Theathre Kid✨ (and because i was afraid some songs from marchiveeee would repeat itself because i have them on my playlists too ajhshwjs great music taste, honey!!!) i choose my musical playlist :p

So... Yeah, enjoy hahahha

PEROSNALITY / Dear Theodosia — Hamilton

So, this song in general is about how much love the characters have for their kids and when you think about it this way, then our OC can appear <a bit> spoiled. And I think she is, we can make it work, I'm actually pretty spoiled myself so yeah XD But her parents had pretty high expectations of her, too

Someday, someday... You'll blow us all away

We can also make the lyric not about her, but sung by her, then we get more personality traits. Because she's a fighter, she tries her best to make this world a better place. She's an activist, I can see her fighting for gay rights, protecting our environment, she's also for sure feminist and she's just so powerful. And it all comes from the fact how much caring she is. She has so much love for other people, even strangers, and she shows it all the time. She's the mum friend.

We'll bleed and fight for you

We'll make it right for you

And the song itself is quite calm and comforting and those words can also describe her. She is your comfort person, who hugs you, listens to you and kicks ass of people who dared upset you.

JOB / We Got Work To Do — Firebringer

Is she... a..... caveman?!?! 😱

Well, unfortunately not :( But I laughed so much when I saw that song because it's both the best and the worst song I could get for this category.

But I think she's some kind of scientist! Like, this or unemployed because::

I don't really wanna do the work today

Hahha, no but for real, I'm pretty sure she's a scientist. It suits both the song and the fact her parents had high expectations of her. And the song later is about discovering new things, learning about the world.

So many wondrous here for our kind

A world of tools and knowledge left to find

BACKSTORY / You Will Be Found — Dear Evan Hansen

THIS IS SUCH A GOOD SONG FOR BACKSTORY OMG OMG I'M LIKE, SO EXCITED AKAJAJJA

It's also a song I usually cry to, even tho it's actually pretty heartwarming.

Have you ever felt like nobody was there?

Have you ever felt forgotten in the middle of nowhere?

Have you ever felt like you could disappear?

Like you could fall, and no one would hear?

We can go with the same plot that is in musical (well, not excatly the same but still) and say that one of her friends commited sui**de. But I don't really feel it, you know? I mean, it would suit her pretty much, but i don't want to make it too easy. I think she herself had problems with her mental health in the past. Maybe because of the pressure, or maybe was she bullied for being too soft? Maybe she befriended someone who was bullied (ekhm KEN) and she got in troubles because of that? Yeah, pretty much. And that was the real reason why she changed school. And in her story, Ken didn't follow her on his own, she made him do it because she didn't want to leave him there alone.

Even when the dark comes crushing through

When you need a friend to carry you

And when you're broken on the ground

You will be found

Anyways, it's all in the past. It made her stronger and even more sensitive for other's pain.

FRIENDS / Raise A Little Hell — Bonnie&Clyde

Okay, now I'm seriously concerned about our little girl.

<I also screamed because i love this song so much>

But okay, it kinda makes sense. She's the "But I can fix him!" kind of girl, so the fact her friends are...... well, the fact that her friends can be defined by this song is not that surprising.

Justice here don't fit the crime

I've been broken by the Devil

Justice is a waste of time

I won't get to heaven

Why not raise a little Hell?

No, seriously, someone needs to kick her ass because she's just, she cannot turn her back to someone who needs help, but sometimes she really SHOULD. I really hope she will find some better friends in future, because the ones she has right now are so gonna ruin her life 🙄

LOVE LIFE / Summer Nights — Grease

HAVE YOU HEARD MY SCREAM?!?! HAVE YOU?!!?! Because I'M GETTING SO LUCKY RIGHT NOW JSJAJANNSNSNA it literally suits her so much!!!

Like, sorry guys, but this time i'll stick with the story showed in musical because IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE!! For context, in musical this song is singed by two main leads to their friends, picturing the same relationship from both perspectives and the boys shows off so much, lies and all those, because being in love is unmanly and he's BAD BOY. And when they meet after the song, he acts like nothing happened in between them because of his reputation.

He got friendly holding my hand

Well she got friendly down in the sand

He was sweet, just turned eighteen

Well, she was good, you know what I mean

And my first thought was to match her with HSL Castiel, but no. No, I would make a terrible mistake if i matched her with Cassie.

Because there's a <University> Nathaniel. And it's just so so so so so so....sjjajajjas how come everything makes so much sense so far?!

She and Nath dated in HSL, broke up when she went to study abroad. And when she came back, she met her high school sweetheart completely broken, a literal bad boy, she barely recognised him after all the sweet times they shared together. And of course she, the fighter, the "i can fix him" kind of girl, went for him. It was painful, but after some time they managed to find each other again.

LIVE IN... / Time Warp — The Rocky Horror Picture Show

What the hell.

Yeah, that broke my mind. Like, I have literally no idea how to make it work.

I remember doing the Time Warp

Ughhhhh so I guess I have to go with the context again. It's a party song. But the characters who are singing actually miss their home very much, as it showed at the end of the movie. So I guess she never moved out of her hometown again after she came back from the uni. She loves this place too much (wherever it is. Like, as far as i remember the city from the My Candy Love doesn't really have a name, right?).

But I have no idea tbh. But every single song before was so good for this challenge, I can live with this one being not. Hopefully the next ones will be easier skjajsjsj

CLOTHING STYLE / I know him — Hamilton

The song is sung by the King, so her clothes are probably pretty expensive. I feel like she's pretty basic, but because of her care for environment, she doesn't do fast fashion and buys only from good, expensive, planet-safe brands. The more eco the better. Song is also pretty cheerful and light, I think her clothes are, too. She probably rarely wears dark colours, she prefer white to black and all that.

HOBBIES / Waving Through a Window — Dear Evan Hansen; There! Right There! — Legally Blonde

So her hobbies are waving through a window and finding something there, right there?! Omg!!!!!! Sjajsjjsjaajja

No, all jokes aside, those are also pretty tough too match to something.

Let's start with the first song

I try to speak, but nobody can hear

So I wait around for an answer to appear

While I'm watch, watch, watching people pass

I'm waving through a window, oh

Can anybody see, is anybody waving back at me?

I know I mentioned at least a few times that she's an activist, but this song actually made me think about what would she do to actually help suffering teenagers. 'Cause she would. She hates bullying and she still remember how much her friend, Ken(tin), has suffered because of it. And there are some non profit organisations founded to fight with it, so maybe one of her "hobbies" would be supporting them as much as she can?? It sounds so stupid as a hobby, i know, but like, i cannot really work with that song 😫 it's not even a hobby as it, but still, she fully gives her whole heart to it, you know??? U get my thinking, right?????

Well now that I'm thinking, maybe she just doesn't really have any hobbies, because she's so focused on her job and on helping other that there's a very little time she has left for herself. It's unhealthy, but the more i think about her, the more it makes sense.

Yeah...

And the second song, do not laugh, but I actually almost instantly got one, extremely stupid idea about a "hobby". Well, at least for her favourite tv series. Because this girl actually love court shows. (Fun fact, i didn't know there was a name for that, i just knew two court shows that were extremely popular in my country even tho the acting in them is horrible akjajajz but i googled it and wow, it's actually a thing). But yeah, she has a thing for them... I once had, too, when I was like 6. But I don't judge (hehe, 'judge').

Wjsjsjjsjsks it's too difficult, next time i'll just do this challenge with a normal playlist because sjajsjjdjwjakkqkwbebdbejwiwksjjdjd 😫😫😫😫

We can also be just so random and say she likes hiking in the forest because in the lyrics of 1st song there's a mention of forest, and she likes sport because in the second song there's a mention of sports 🙄🙄🙄🙄 you know what, let's just be random, yeah, i give up.

When you're falling in a forest

---

They play peculiar sports

In shiny shirts and tiny shorts

Hope you're satisfied. (i'll never be 😫)

——————————

Now that I have all the data I can choose a name for her. She could just stay Candy, it suits her, but she also gives me a "M name" kind of vibe, like Melody (IT WOULD BE SO FUNNY IF SHE WAS A MELODY TOO SINCE SHE'S WITH NATH THO XDDD) or Maisie. Yeah, Maisie is great.

Maisie Bonnet, I would say. Well, I'm so sorry, Maisie, but I already have one OC for Nath, so I don't think I will ever write anything about you... Well, my oc for Nath does not break up with him tho, so maybe someday, if i get to write and university smut or something like that....... we'll see ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

-----------------

Anyway, I had so much fun I definitely try to do it sometime again!!! Thank you again, Mar!!! ❤️❤️ And I also thank everyone who even read the whole thing :")

And since i was challenged, i want to challenge someone, too!

I CHALLENGE:

@allyymcl hi :p of course you don't have to do it if you don't want to 👉🏻👈🏻 but i would really like to see your oc and which one of LI would they suit the best🥺

[rantingcrocodile]

So I've been lurking around radfem spaces to gain some education and have been very much into bi-radfem spaces since I am bi myself. I've only found you the past couple days, but your response to the 'trans/bi movement being the same' person was so raw, and honestly made me tear up. You fight so hard, and I love you for that! Thank you! <3

Thank you, but it's genuinely nothing.

I am so angry that we have all of this knowledge at our disposal and there is not one single academic feminist who has properly explored bisexuality.

I am so angry that we have all of the studies and resources at our fingertips and there is not one single academic feminist who has joined the obvious dots to discuss the reality and impact of biphobia.

I am so angry that it's come down to myself and a small number of others, completely ordinary bisexual women, who have come to what I've realised are such basic and common sense understandings of bisexuality and biphobia that no one else is talking about.

It's all right there. It hasn't been hidden under lock and key. It takes the most cursory glance and thought to put these most simple puzzle pieces together.

If you're getting into radfem spaces online as a bisexual woman? Do me a favour and don't.

This is the fucking state of promoted feminism today:

Kathleen Stock, darling of the feminist community for speaking out against TRAs and being bullied at Sussex University, doesn't blame straight people for appropriating bisexuality, she blames bisexuals instead.

To Kathleen Stock, bisexuals only matter if we exist to support lesbians and gay men.

Biphobia doesn't matter. The realities of biphobic oppression don't matter. She didn't even stop to think about the basic, "Wait, if bisexuals don't have any issues aside from being in same-sex relationships, then why aren't bisexuals in opposite-sex relationships normalised? Why aren't bisexuals in opposite-sex relationships all out and secure? Why do bisexuals have such a hard time coming to terms with their bisexuality? Why do the studies into bisexuality show that bisexuals, particularly bisexual women, tend to be worse off than even lesbians in different cases?" because if she did, then she'd have to stop and accept that the world can't be erased as merely "straight vs gay" without actively harming bisexuals. But she doesn't do that, because she and other "feminists" like her don't fucking care about us.

No. Instead, we only matter to serve other people's purposes, and we're only objects that either matter or don't matter depending on the humanity of our partners, whether we can be accepted as "gay" or dismissed and derided as "straight."

If you were part of TRA spaces and woke up about biphobia there, then if you come to radfem spaces, then all you're going to do is internalise a different kind of biphobia.

Radical feminism as a political ideology, going to its roots, examining it in a way that supports women and tells the truth about the world, is genuinely good.

The "radical feminism" that has stayed stuck in its biphobic past and has only evolved into "wait, we have to fight against trans activists attacking women's rights and when they attack lesbians" is still completely useless for us.

If you've over 18 and wanting to actually get into a kind of radical feminism that makes sense and discusses our issues as bisexual women, then please join the discord. Save yourself the heartache of thinking that radfems give a shit about you, because those generally out there in the world today just don't. Everything to them boils down to being the fault of bisexual women to the point that they excuse oppressors, just the same way that Kathleen Stock is happy to do.

And her "unpopular opinion" isn't unpopular. It's the standard belief of radfems across this space and other radfem spaces, including numerous bisexuals with internalised biphobia. Seriously. Do not do it to yourself, because it rips your heart out, spits on it, then tells you that you deserve it, when we deserve so much better.

[delusion-of-negation]

i hate tags like this - where on the surface you're not being really objectionable, but you're missing the point, and going on this lil' tangent that implies either 1) you think i said the opposite of the words i explicitly said, or 2) what you're actually doing is using a sentence that isn't objectionable to mean something that is. it's frustrating. i never said anything about you having to talk to the person (said the opposite), and i said your idea of a "better" way shouldn't be forced on them, so i pretty clearly think that there's reasons you or your rapist may not want the other helping them. where i actually said you do have a responsibility to them is not harming them for amusement/vengeance/etc. that them failing responsibility to other people doesn't mean they deserve to face similar failure of responsibility. so i have to parse "is this saying i meant something i didn't, is it trying to disagree with what i was actually saying, or did you see the words rapist and better in the same post and simply repeat a catchphrase?" i don't want to go contact certain people, not just those who raped, even shithead immature bullies, i'm not gonna swoon into their lives again like "hello, heard you're still a cunt, let me over-moralise it, and force unwilling people to become my idea of a good guy :)". the fact it basically came down to "rapists are part of the problem. and we would like a better future. so then rapists must participate in the solution." when that's not what this post is about or saying. that annoys me. i make it so clear here that we aren't to individualise systemic problems, you cannot single-handedly save your rapist when you're facing down a criminal justice system that wants to abuse them - you shouldn't abuse them yourself, but the system absolutely will if it doesn't change. rapists aren't the cause of the systemic problem this post is about, they're the victims of it, for most situations - even prison rape is generally either guards, or falsely condemning actual relationships, or done under extreme pressure from the environment to do that, so when rapists have victimised other rapists as an arm of the system, it's more of an intricate situation than when you do it because you think they're deserving of it. the systemic issue this post is about isn't generic feminist mantra number 243, this isn't the "guilt-trip rapists for perpetuating patriarchy" post, this is about you, this is about an issue you have that caused you to see a post that is just trying to discuss real suffering people, and you just demonised them, and implied the only reason to help them is so that they can work for causes you actually care about. here's some food for thought, in maybe a week, let's say the entire world becomes this ideal, any rapists get treated like this, they are reminded they can't expect anybody who finds them icky to help, shamed into becoming an idealised version of a person that is impossible to uphold based entirely on others' idea of a "good person", any kindness they do receive is undercut with the note that you're only doing it so the rapist can "become part of the solution" to problems you face. it immediately is followed by you being falsely accused of rape, so everybody believes it, and you spend the rest of your life with all kindness being to strongarm you into being a "good" person, not regarding your own moral standards or desires but others', while friends and family gradually disappear, you're alone, and you are expected to work constantly for somebody else's goals, lest you ultimately be deemed a bad person and isolated more. you want chillaxing on the sofa, you get enforced moral ocd levels of crap, social isolation, trust issues, and a dehumanising life. so i'm not talking about not harming rapists, or not removing the depth of people's character, or not over-moralising/controlling, because i believe they need to become my little utopia activists, i do it just because torturing people hurts them. that's it. torture, not great.

the 👏🏽 world 👏🏽 is 👏🏽 not 👏🏽 separated 👏🏽 into 👏🏽 good 👏🏽 and 👏🏽 bad 👏🏽 people 👏🏽 if your politics and/or social categorisation of all people relies on the notion that some are inherently good or some are inherently bad, you're doing it wrong. ray comfort, the banana dude, makes the argument "if you steal, what are you? a thief, so therefore if you sin you're a sinner." and i see a lot of people who essentially say the same thing in lefty terms and with reference to various other crimes, except it's reductive either way. you are not simply a thief, you are so much more than that. you're not simply a liar, as ray also says, if you lie. to treat people as purely described exclusively by a thing they did once is fucking childish. you aren't ever, under any circumstances, a bad person. you're complicated.

[papirouge]

Are you familiar with that polish prolife activist suzanna Wiewiórka? She was awarded by the government some time back for preventing a girl from terminating her pregnancy but went about it by harassing her and informing her parents & bf. She holds pretty extremist views like saying to fight for the unborn, she'd push for banning sex ed, murdering doctors and blowing up buildings of clinics.. scary thing is that I know people like her who are in the pro life movement but arent in it for good reasons. I see them as violent bullies who get off on harassing others with some moral superiority and threats of violence but its "ok" because they're fighting for a good cause. Heck, I know men and have heard men only fight for this movement to "punish whores" l???? How does that help babies??? Idk... for me, it's always been about getting to the root cause of why women and young girls who are scared seek abortion. Then tackling those issues. Make abortion be so rare it only happens in extreme cases, you know? Because for other cases, women are taken care of. And when women are cared for, babies survive and flourish. Everyone seems so...extreme lately idk how to put it.

Maybe extreme situations ask extremes mesure anon

A few centuries ago, stating that Blacks were as humans as White and/or that slavery should be abolished was an "extreme" statement

A few decades ago, advocating that women should be able to vote, divorce, have an account, etc. was an "extreme" statement

You won't pour lukewarm water to cool down some boiling water ; cold water will always be more efficient and straightforward.

Not being extreme doesn't necessarily make one more "wise" ; sometimes, it just means they're spineless¯\_(ツ)_/¯

In the end of the day, I refuse to belong to the side arguing over someone humanhood and developmental stage process to when it's a better fit to kill them.

Dudebros wanting to punish whore while making women keep their child will get men to pay for these children so.... it's quite an interesting self own. But men wanting to hook up scot free while defending abortion are worse. They're deadbeats and I'm baffled by how much of a pass they get from so called misandrist feminist who will ALWAYS refuse to question abortion...

You could take toxic poster child for any movement, anon.

White supremacists have a field day with BLM to argue that any anti racist movement is shady and that anti Black racism isn't real.

We could use Harry Hay (gay rights OG activist)being a rabid defender of NAMBLA (pedo lobby) to argue homosexuals are all pedophiles and don't deserve rights.

My ask & mentions are full of death threats and harassment of pro choices, so what you're actually saying could actually be used against the pro choice lobby, so...

Maybe the issue is less about being extreme and more about people learning to not being a jerk with people you disagree with?

[saintcheryl]

hi oh my god thank you for the misha podcast rant. I like him a lot too which is why I need to occasionally refuel myself on him being fucking stupid but i couldn't put myself through ACTUALLY listening to him spew liberal-establishment takes. i am CHEERING you on, that man NEEDS to be radicalized.

not to vent but you got me really excited so: i watched an interview with Haitian activist David Oxygène and he talked specifically about continued US imperialism in Haiti and said "Joe Biden is a democrat. Donald Trump is a Republican. But how are their policies different?" Like, this is what liberals like Misha Collins do not understand: just bc life is now "better" for white liberals who were "stressed" doesn't mean it's changed for everyone else, especially not marginalized peoples and ESPECIALLY not marginalized peoples in other countries we keep intervening in. to act like Biden has integrity when he exists to keep a system that enforces oppression running smoothly is....ignorant.

and this all reminds me of how some of misha's political work in the past DOES lean towards white saviorism. like i think he's aware that prejudice exists and he wants to fight back against sexism and racism but he doesn't REALLY understand how it operates beyond vocal sexists and racists. for example: his # abolishice tweets where he claimed that "he supports ethical workers who just enforce immigration laws" and "while ice was bad under Obama too, the current policies under Trump are human rights violations." But like he doesn't fucking INTERROGATE that and go "wait what do borders even mean? How can we enforce laws against people MOVING? can a policing org like ice even exist without oppressing marginalized people and uplifting the white supremacist carceral state?"

LONG RANT SHORT: yes i agree celebrity liberals are being really irresponsible (and disingenuous) and i agree we can hold space to both admire his mobilizing of fans for charity and activism reasons while criticizing the areas he falls short. and i think he's getting it into his head right now that politics might be viable for him now that supernatural is over and i honestly think someone needs to drag him/hand him the communist manifesto before he gears up to run for office. you may not want to bully him but IIIII will take the fall, Dmitri let me lecture you PLEASE. anyway i am SO sorry you sat through that podcast episode. I looked at the woman's Twitter page for the podcast and like....she seems white feminist so. You're brave. I appreciate your sacrifice. I salute you! Thank you :)

OH THANK U FOR THE INPUT esp about the saviorism that tracks lookin back lmao yeah its like. all rich white democrat shit!!!!!!!!! like. cmon dude think about it a little longer…….interrogate some things Please

and yes exactly like. criticism doesnt negate any good someones done! just good 2 be informed and think about things. anyways if this man r*ns for *ff*c* i will officially be certain that we are in the most absurd and made up timeline. a cosmic joke if you will. terrifying

[millennialgenderabolitionist]

Exactly. The irony is that OP is defending an activism that cannot even define what a woman is, they always either revert to sexist stereotypes or a circular definition (therefore, by principle, not a definition but a perpetual unanswered question).

You're all calling any woman who knows what a woman is a "TERF" so I will concede that not all "TERFs" are feminists, because the word "TERF" itself is empty of meaning. You could have also used "feminazi" or "witch" or "bitch" for all we care, it would be just the same : its usage isn't destined to correctly describe a group of people, it's there to shame, mock and bully. It's a sexist word as well since all that is done to a group who's exclusively female and, like I said, for no other reason than being female.

Radical feminists (left-wing) can be grouped with liberal feminists (who still are vocal about what a woman is), conservative women and even apolitical anti-feminists under the "TERF" acronym as long as we open our mouths and simply say what a woman or what a lesbian specifically is (even a conservative religious homophobe who wants to send us to conversation therapy know what a lesbian is ... yet gender activists think we can be in any capacity into males and their penis). This is ridiculous but very symptomatic of the lack of intelligence we face from our detractors.

Idk why we even bother to pretend "radfems" and TERFs are feminists. Cause they're not.

They actively push sexist and patriarchal agendas for the sole purpose of -get this- controlling people's bodies and defining their worth based off what their genitalia and/or what they do with it. (I.e. you are only a women if you have a vagina and can make babies. Too bad to all the cis women who cannot have children for xyz reason or any intersex women)

Like we need to give them another name because I feel that having feminist in their names gives off false advertising.

[whenthesecondsun]

Lmao

It's so transparent that a lot of people on here who consider themselves trans or allies clearly have no real life experience of being trans at all. What other reason for why they don't give a shit about any REAL issue trans people face, and would rather focus their energies on things like internet bullying with no irl counterparts, specific "marketable" issues like the public bathroom thing over bigger concerns such as housing and healthcare access, simplify their entire "activism" into basically the repetition of meaningless slogans and starting arguments online that they know from the start they'll never win because they're not being genuine about it.

That's not to say that a lot of so called "radical feminists" on here don't do the exact same thing with similar results (i.e. none that have any use to anyone).

But lbr, if the tumblr/Twitter trans crowd actually cared about trans people's rights they would:

-focus more on trans men than trans women, since trans men are a majority (but they don't, almost ever, and I can't help but wonder why...)

-they would be very concerned with issues re: medicalizing trans children, puberty blockers, sex change surgeries, because more and more research/first person accounts are shining a light on issues with these practices that apparently all of trans activists, in their endless "goodwill" towards their fellow trans, would rather ignore so they can pretend everything is fine, and I guess fuck all the trans people who will suffer under these medical practices.

-they would care about trans people's access to quality healthcare that is not just limited to transitioning in and of itself. Including dismissing this new trendy idea that sex isn't real since that would be extremely dangerous for trans people specifically if they are being diagnosed/treated for a condition that differs depending on sex.

-they would care about issues like housing and job discrimination, imprisonment rates for minor crimes, violence, education outcomes, drug use and abuse, and basically all of these issues that disproportionately affect minorities.

-they would be proactive about the violent crimes committed against trans people and pinpointing what groups are to blame and how to hold them accountable, instead of only quoting misguided murder statistics to win arguments and then promptly ignoring any follow up concerns.

-they would be interested in creating and promoting research into gendered behavior and how transition and length of time since transition affects or doesn't affect gendered behavior in people, and possibly go as far as start interest in trans people actively learning behavior patterns of their new gender instead of waiting to pick up on those clues subconsciously, or only focusing on physical appearance and intentional gendered behavior which is more often than not an exaggeration as seen from an external perspective, and not behavior picked up from "living as" a specific gender.

In short: there are a lot of things that trans rights activism can and should be focusing on if their real stated goal is to improve the quality of life and increase protection of trans people of all kinds and backgrounds. Unfortunately, that's never the kind of activism I see online. On here, it's almost as if all of the loudest members of the community have never even stepped outside to see how real life works when you're trans. So they think debating pronouns in a public internet forum is the most important thing in the world, but don't even know what the legitimate murder statistics for trans people in their area is. They argue that being "inherently feminine" is at the core of being a trans women, but don't want to read any legitimate research on dysphoria, or gender non conformity, or the roots of our current understanding of "femininity" so that they have a proper understanding of what they're talking about. They love quoting that life expectancy statistic that has been disproven multiple times as being specifically about prostituted trans women of color, but would rather shout slogans like "sex work is work!" over having a honest discussion as to why it is prostituted trans women of color who are at most risk for violence/murder, and what can be done institutionally to improve their quality of life and safety (hint: getting them out of prostitution would go a long way).

If you claim to care about trans people, then care about them. Do research, be honest to yourself and others about what the real issues are and what are their real causes and likely solutions, stop your silly online performances that are so clearly geared at getting approval from your peers and not at being genuine in your concern for trans people's rights.

Half of you here are clearly only trans online which is how you can be willfully ignorant of irl issues (since they don't concern you). A lot of others - some of the loudest members of this community - are older, wealthier trans people who had the money and influence to afford expensive surgeries to pass completely or to get people to pretend they do, so irl trans issues barely apply to them because they're protected by their privilege. These are the people claiming to speak for the trans community. These are the people at the head of every organisation and bankrolling "research" that utterly dismisses any areas of concern for trans people because it doesn't fit with their world-view (because they're rich and they don't give a shit).

Stop letting rich scumbags and online trolls doing it for likes be the spokespeople for trans rights. At least if you actually care. But it's so clear to me that most of you don't, really. You want to be woke by agreeing with the right comments by the right people (the loud, and famous, ones). You don't want to think hard or feel true sympathy or go against the grain to do better by a group of marginalized people. No one ever does, because that's not fun. It is necessary, but who gives a shit about that, right?

mom: how are you

me: fine

me: *in my head* ‘terf’ has developed into a misogynistic silencing tactic that aims to invalidate radical feminists who challenge the status quo. its inherently harmful as it redirects attention away from actual oppressors of trans people (men) while simultaneously discrediting any legitimate attempt at deconstructing gender as a social hierarchy

[cottoncandysecretlair]

You've come off a lot less harsh in this response compared to some of the other replies I've gotten (some of the radfems in the notes seem exactly like the women that bully me).

I Def understand what you're getting at tho. I know oppressive systems are complicated, and I also want women in general to have better lives. But the reason I question radfems specifically is the harshness I've seen from them.

While my original post exposed some personal frustrations, as a whole I'm a pacifist that believes all people deserve love and comfort. That may seem very rainbow and butterflies of me, but it's sincere.

So seeing a lot of radfems go around about hating men, or mistreating men and using societal oppression as ammo, or just disregarding the feelings of individual men... Well I hate that. So so much. Because I don't think you should mistreat anyone if you claim activism. Meanness isn't a desirable thing for anyone.

So when I even step out of my ideals of care and love for everyone, and I see the people in my life that I love the most and have helped me the most a target, it makes me alarmed.

I actually used to be a hard core leftist feminist, not radfem but privy to the ideals. And to be frank? I started questioning the ideals due to the meanness of the women and activists involved. Was just like the girls in school. Just as much talking down to me, like all the radfems in the notes.

Actual Sincere Question for Radfems

I am a biological female. A lot of radfem rhetoric pushes for biological females to prioritize other biogocal females. Right?

You want women to be focused on helping other women, interacting with other women, and forming bonds with other women. That type of ideology.

Now, ignoring any other disagreements I have, how do you propose that idea to a girl that's faced her worse at the hands of other girls and women.

I, for example, always got along with guys better in the social arena. My earliest bullies were all other girls. Other girls tore down my self esteem before I hit the age of 10.

My mother encouraged it, forcing me on dangerous low calorie diets as young as 7 years old. Other women in my family bullied me in their own way, belittling my appearance because I wasn't feminine or girly enough or they saw my autistic traits and hated them.

Women taught me to hate myself, while the men I befriended over the years showed me looks don't matter, and gave me time and support when I needed it.

So with my experiences, why would I make women a priority? Why would I wanna tell the men in my life that they're not well meaning?

Like I don't wanna get yelled at, I'm honestly curious.