#you'll just have to take my word for it and go read the 2nd chapter :))

[iamespecter]

2nd chapter for "The Unexpected Reunion" is out now! You can read it here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/56008111/chapters/142398205#workskin

[hello-vampire-kitty]

Servamp chapter 133 translation "One"

Read the chapter on MangaDex!

Oh boy, while this chapter doesn't have as much dialogue like the rest that I have to work on, I had some lines that gave me trouble, like you will see in the TL notes, so please look over them. Translation notes

Although it's trivial and I'll be going over something from an early chapter but hey, you'll see just how bad the English translation is, especially with the early volumes.

Some time ago I asked on Twitter if people recalled the nickname Kuro had for Sakuya, because I had the impression he had one for him in the early chapters, similar to how Kuro calls Misono "kisama-chan", which I translate as little bastard xD Kuro refers to Sakuya as 外ハネ "soto hane" which I translated simply as "curly hair", rather than "flipped hair" which is what you'll see if you google the term. I looked into the anime subs and it was translated as "side flare." I could have used that, but to quote Mahiru, "Simple is best" xD

IIn the official localization of the manga it's not even translated T_T

The 2nd and 3rd panel are poorly translated, like the "grungy" joker part, Kuro just calls him "joker" and that's where he also calls him "soto hane. Oh boy but the last two lines in the 3rd panel are soo bad. What Kuro said originally was "I don't think little bastard and him would get along", to which Mahiru replies "Little bastard...you mean Misono?!" Yeah, so it's quite different. Okay, so let's move on to the other notes I have for this chapter.

Tsubaki's last line had me like "What?" Hopefully I haven't misunderstood it. So, Tsubaki uses the word 貯蔵庫 which means storehouse which sounds weird...The way it's written in Japanese, his line could also be translated as "Put away the "prototype" used for storage", but that doesn't make sense, right? Also, I can't say if it's singular or plural regarding the word prototype. I used the plural only because he said "siblings", cause I think it refers to them. So yeah, it's weird, what does he mean regarding storage? We'll have to see if it's brought up in other chapters.

While most of the characters' abilities have two different readings to them, in this case, the furigana reading which is the intended reading is actually used to show the pronunciation of the kanji.

Tanaka-sensei used different kanji with the same pronunciation to spell the words "shura" that is written as 修羅 and "sousou" (funeral) which is written as 葬送 Shura (or Asura), has been brought up before by Tsubaki, but with another meaning, such as fighting; carnage.

Tsubaki's ability in Japanese is written as 朱羅葬想

修=朱

送=想

So instead of the usual kanji 修羅葬送 (shura sousou) in this case, the first and 4th kanji were replaced like I showed above, both having the same pronunciation and you can't exactly get a translation for the words, so I will just breakdown each kanji to see what they represent.

The first kanji 朱 means "red; vermilion; cinnabar; scarlet". This one is probably used to make a reference to blood in my opinion.

The fourth kanji 想 means "thoughts, emotions, feelings".

So yeah, written like this 朱羅葬想 it can't be translated and the kanji that were used are most likely meant to be representative for Tsubaki. That's my opinion.

He also says the word 迎え (mukae) which means "meeting; greeting; welcome". I can't say how it relates to "shura sousou", but I thought that maybe his ability has styles? Perhaps the "welcome" is one style like from what we see, he makes some kind of barrier and when he's attacked, he vanishes and appears behind Kuro Maybe he has other fighting styles used for close combat.

Oh my God, like maybe it sounds dumb but I legit didn't know how else I could adapt what Kuro says about the counter-attack, because there were hardly any examples of how some of the words in Japanese were used, like one of them was from what I gathered, a term used in sports that translates as "take the field first" and another one basically meant ""going second" and there was another example that basically meant "going second", then there was another word that I only found in a single example...It was awful.

Cleaning the speech bubble was tough and I think it looks decent.

As you might have seen, I added this page again at the end of the chapter on Mangadex to show the other reading of the ability, "Ashes to ashes, dust to dust" because I couldn't add it because there wasn't enough space in the speech bubble. So, when I looked up the word, it was interesting that Wiedergänger share similarities to strigoi from my country's folklore. I think others might have brought this up regarding inner Kuro, but the fact that he uses a stake to pierce himself and uses it as a weapon that takes the form of the thing that was used to kill Kuro, a stake is used to kill a strigoi to keep them in their coffins.

Regarding inner Kuro's last line, the intended reading is "let's talk" but the other reading says "let's fight".

Also, he uses the verb 引きこもる "hikikomoru" and when you make it into a noun, you get hikikomori which is how Kuro is described. I had to chose a word that would fit both character's lines, because I couldn't have inner Kuro says "hey come on, don't be a shut-in", "or "don't seclude yourself from me", it would have sounded weird.

I think it's clever how Tanaka used that specific verb instead of just saying something like "Hey, don't stand so far away" So yeah, hopefully my insights were helpful :)

[skzhocomments]

A Chance of Fate - Lee Know Stray Kids Fanfic (Masterlist)

Pairing: Minho (of Stray Kids) x OC (name: Dal-Rae)

Genre: non-idol AU, angst, romance, fluff, mature

Word Count: ~33k

Warnings: mature, swearing, feelings of hopelessness, angst, depression, crying, mentions of domestic violence, depression, anxiety, angst, low self-esteem etc.

This is just a story that doesn’t describe Stray Kids members' true characters in any way. It’s just a product of my imagination and should be treated as such.

This story is also on Wattpad (click here) and AO3 (click here)

A/N: As any other writer out there, I would appreciate reblogs and your comments on this story. Please let me know if you enjoyed it, and most importantly, have fun!

---

Summary:

$7, a small suitcase, a thin coat and some old, worn-out shoes that took you nowhere in particular were the only belongings you grabbed when you decided on a whim to leave your abusive ex during a cold winter night. With the merciless wind blowing right in your face, you weren't sure where to go, or what to do. The only thing you were sure of was that you could never return back home, not when you've thrown away your keys to ensure you'd stay strong. Tired and hungry, you stumbled by a chance of fate upon a small restaurant called 'Know Your Cats', and you decided to walk in.

Non-idol AU Lee Know (Stray Kids) Fanfic Mature content ahead. 18+ ©storminsidemycore

---

Hello!

Storm here!

A Chance of Fate is a story I've started writing on 27/10/2022 (yes, two freaking years ago!!!) that 'collected dust on the shelves' until yesterday when I finally managed to finish it.

It has around 33k words divided in 10 chapters, and I'm very excited to post it, since it's a story I actually enjoy and I've been working on for quite some time as you can see, hahah.

Surprisingly, no smut whatsoever in this story, however, like each and every one of my works, it includes lots of mature themes, so it's 18+ either way.

Main character's name is Dal-Rae, story is however written in 2nd person, so you can expect most phrases to refer to "You".

I hope you'll enjoy this story and I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts. ♡

---

The story and cover are original and my property. Any similarities to other stories are purely coincidental. Jieun, the protagonist, is a made-up character.

Stray Kids members or any other famous people mentioned along this story DO NOT represent their true character in any way, they are simply mentioned in order to provide a visual representation for the readers. Their personas obviously have nothing to do with their true personalities. They're just characters I've created for this story, so please don't take this too seriously.

Mature content ahead. Lots of trigger warnings apply, so please read carefully.

---

18+

©storminsidemycore

---

Chapter 1 - Know Your Cats - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 2 - We'll replace the broken plates - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 3 - Olivia's Store - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 4 - Blooming Feelings - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 5 - The Gathering - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 6 - Grandma's house - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 7 - Stay - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 8 - An Unwelcome Encounter - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 9 - Pain and Fear - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 10 - A Little Family (Final Chapter) - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

---

Thank you so much for reading my story, and I'm looking forward to seeing your thoughts!

[mononijikayu]

Hi Kayu~ Your latest chapter of A.o.L had my JAW DROPPED. NO WAY SHE HAD A KID WITH MO. I was like “hol up, why she do that?” but after the story I understood why she had another kid. Bro the DOMAIN EXPANSION is actually kinda OP ngl especially in the golden age of sorcery and Hiromi’s tie to Hida, it makes her so powerful. Which I think for people you haven’t read your Gojo stuff with Gem, it really encapsulates how important it was for the Gojo to marry her. It was truly for protection because she’s literally so OP (and love later on). okay JUST A HYPOTHETICAL, imagine “Hiromi” (or someone that looks like her in modern day) runs into Sukuna in Yuji’s body or even WORSE she’s in the culling games 🫣

Sorry you feel so discouraged :( writing on tumblr is so hard because a majority of the time people either read your stuff and don’t interact or they just don’t drop by and say hi :/ You are certainly not alone in feeling this and if you have to take a break off tumblr you are allowed to do so~ I will wait months, if not years to see another work from you. You’ve carved a spot yourself in the JJK fandom and I think that it’ll just take time for more people to notice you. Like historic JJK fic’s are super in rn and the audience just has to find you~

All the love and virtual hugs 💕

- ✈️

i saw this before i took a nap but these lovely words made me feel so 🥰🥰🥰🥰❗️❗️❗️❗️— so thank you!!!

hiromi knew that something was going to happen and really thought that the ryomen would not be able to stand by themselves, not especially with sukuna around. if she dies, sukuna's not going to stop the cycle of violence just to avenge her. and she doesnt want that. leaving it all to masaomi and their kid and taking away that power from sukuna, its her will. she wants it all to end!

hiromi's entire power is VERY OP. but its very deadly too. its why the 2nd user died at a young age. the fact that she holds off using it until a specific point says a lot. its another reason why sukuna felt like he had to be strong. because he has to match up with a god.

and yeah, the mikoto were aware that the zenin had plans to use that power against anyone and everyone. so genmei marrying satoru saved her and jujutsu society. genmei and megumi were definitely lucky with him!!! he worries a lot when she uses her power, though. he's hiromi's descendant too. he doesnt want genmei to end up like hiromi!!!

hiromi and genmei look alike already, but i guess the differences exist because she has that zenin look. but hiromi and sukuna do see each other again in the modern times. the last chapter for AOL is definitely going to start that and end up being extended in Us and Them!!! also, i can see hiromi being interested in the culling games too 😩☝️

thank you for validating that feeling. i feel like i do write but i think maybe i need to adjust things when writing and interact with people more. i feel like i just come by and just drop a chapter and leave — i feel like that also affects it too. but i am pretty burnt out right now and with how algorithms work and in between with back to back exams for me, i might take a break!!!

im grateful to know that you'll be here waiting, nonnie!!! i already wrote down the plot points for the last wo chapters of AOL, i just need to write them after my exams~ i look forward to seeing you then and after too!!!

i think i did carve a space for me here too. i hope i can do well and enjoy with people still. thats the biggest wish i have when i write — that people would enjoy with me!!! ill wait until that happens, i think. you can wish upon a star for the best 🤩

thank you for all your words, nonnie!!! ill treasure them!!! i hope this wasnt too long and that it got my genuine heart across!!! love you nonnie!!! mwah 😚😚😚

[taestefully-in-luv]

anon who had to re-read the chapter is back! and I'm on my laptop now to TYPE a lot of things lol

FIRST OF ALL, thank you so much for writing and finishing Love Again!!! Not a jab in any way to writers who weren't able to finish their works (I swear I understand them) but it's just so uncommon to me to find GREAT fics that interest me so much and are completed. In the end, fics are free and we have a lot of things going on in life so for me it's not a big problem at all 😆

I'm a silent reader (I'M SORRY) so I have to say now that I'll re-read the whole story for a minimum of 2 times and I hope you know your works are such a gem that people want to re-read them! If not the first, I think your works are one of the firsts I've read here on tumblr after kinda migrating from ao3 AND MAN did you make me stay here on tumblr! 

I started Love Again I think when you were just on the 2nd chapter?? I'm not sure but looking back wow that's a long time I guess? And I just want to say THANK YOU really for the wonderful work. It made me feel a lot of things and realize a lot of things too! The story is very unique for me and your writing style is just so impeccable 😭 I swear like if you were to publish content, I WILL buy them. Seriously running out of words here to describe how great you write and how easy it is to read AND FEEL but the quality is just top notch like??? You're amazing!!

I can't recall a lot from the previous chapters lol but I swear I always had a great time reading. Because it's the most recent, let me talk about the final chapter and just WOW -- you didn't lie with it tying up ends. I also love how everyone had their scenes but I kinda wished there were more y/n & Jimin moments. THOUGH I know that is just self-indulgent lmao because everything aligns and makes perfect sense already but as you said there will be drabbles so please know that we will be here for them 🥰

I was so on edge with Jimin being sus in chapter 14 like I was ready to expect an exes to exes ending lol but it made so much sense. I also recently finished therapy sessions and I guess the last chapter also made me feel seen in some way that therapy doesn't make you weak but it makes you really have brighter days without disregarding the not so good things that happened in the past hehe.

I don't have a line yet from LA that sticks with me (let me insert again my favorite thing you did in red wherein the meaning of the color red became good at the ending 😭 pls my heart), maybe it's the sepanx lol but please know that I'll always ALWAYS remember and cherish this story! Like a favorite book! Everything I didn't know I'd like in a book is here hehe

That's all for now I guess lol. I'm in anon but you'll always have me following this blog and appreciating all your works! I also always hope that you're doing great or okay! Always take care 💜

[ms-moonlight-inn]

2021 Fic Year in Review

Thanks for the tag @stillbeatingheart

Total Number Of Completed Works:

12 officially posted

+ 4 more completed ones awaiting their waiting reveal date

Total Word Count:

208,063 😳 WTF?

(that's not counting the unrevealed ones)

Fandoms I’ve Written In:

Shameless (US)

Red, White, and Royal Blue

Original Works

Looking Back, Did You Write More Fic Than You Thought You Would This Year, Less, Or About What You’d Expected?:

Way more! 😂😆 Never expected to be writing any fic. Like, at all! I've already got 12 pieces posted & I only just started fandom writing in April.

All credit/blame to: @stillbeatingheart @dancermk @livelynarrations

What’s Your Own Favorite Story Of The Year?:

Ugh. Sophie's Choice...

Degrees of Separation & Love Me At Half-Light. DOS 'cause it was my debut. LMAH 'cause it was my vanity project.

Did You Take Any Writing Risks This Year?:

So far, I've made it a point to do something risky in all my fandom writing. I mean, I never intended to write fanfic to begin, so if I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna DO it. As I'm fond of saying, "If you're gonna be a monkey, you might as well be a gorilla."

The biggest example? That hanging ending in chapter 10 of LMAH. 😆 Damn, I'm sure there were a couple of readers ready to hang me after that. 😬

Do You Have Any Fanfic Or Profic Goals For The New Year?:

Keep writing.

Most Popular Story Of The Year?:

Going by kudos, that'd be Zero To Six. There's something about Mickey & Ian strapped down with a litter o' kids that y'all really responded to. 😉

Story Of Mine Most Under-Appreciated By The Universe, In My Opinion:

I have a soft spot for Graveyard Shift. It's written entirely in the 2nd person, which gives it this sweet lyrical feel. At least, that's how it reads to me. Plus, it got podfic'ed! C'mon, people, what's a girl gotta do to get your attention? 🤨

Most Fun Story To Write:

All my co-written works were fun as shit to write! When the partnership is right, the collab is truly transcendent. So far, those are:

We're Really Bad At This, But We Ain't No Quitters with @jackieq

Zero To Six with @stillbeatingheart

Late Night Calls with @notherenj-nowherenj (yes, there's also the rimming fic)

Most Unintentionally Telling Story:

I don’t normally do self-inserts since I already do creative nonfiction & if I feel like spilling my guts, then I can just go do that there.

BUT, I do tend to write from my very strong opinion. 😂 So, you'll see some common themes in my works. Often, you'll see my characters battling with the push & pull of real-life bullshit. Sometimes, the bullshit wins; usually love does. Yeah, I know, I'm a fucking sap. 🥰

Biggest Disappointment:

How much I've been looking at my stats page. Ugh. Ugly, dirty secret of mine. Here I am, confessing my vanity in public. All my friends already know how vain I am in private. 😆

Biggest Surprise:

That I even started writing fanfiction to begin with. I've always been a creative nonfiction writer; fiction (all types of fiction) has always been my fear animal. But here I am doing the damn thing.

My Favorite Part Of Fandom This Year:

Hands down, the camaraderie I have found in my little pocket of the universe. I have a small, but important collection of friends because of fandom.

Another favorite part has been an unexpected side effect of some of the fics I've read. Seriously, some of y'all are writing some downright therapeutic shit & it's been an additional source of comfort for me. I've been able to see certain things from different perspectives because of fandom writings.

Oops, forgot to tag...

@notherenj-nowherenj @thisdivorce @dancermk @captainjowl

And all others who want to play! I'm curious as shit!

[danielsharmanswife]

-A warm bath and a sandwich-

Ewan McGregor characters x reader

2nd month: Mark Renton x Fem! Reader. (Part 1)

Author's note: Hey, cuties!❤ How have you been? I hope you and your family are safe and sound. I just wanted to say that I'm quite happy about this chapter and I hope that you guys enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

As always, I want to remind you that English is not my first language, so I'm sorry if there are any grammar mistake.

Word count: 1,821

Warning: mention of drugs, swearing

Tag list: @rosionis @rebleforkicks @bluerose512 @space-no0dle @elizabeth-skywalker

Masterlist Letters Masterlist

You didn't feel any dizziness, or a white light, you didn't even feel yourself levitating. For a moment, you thought you were still with Catcher, but when you opened your eyes, you confirmed that you were no longer there with him. 

You were in a totally white room that was so bright it burned your eyes. It seemed unreal, a science fiction room, the kind without doors or windows. The only thing in the room was a high white table made of the same material as the walls and the floor. On that table were two objects: an envelope and the Barbara Novak book.

You were very puzzled but you approached the table and took the envelope, opening it and taking out the note that was inside.

 It said:

Good morning, (y / n)! I see that you have passed the month easely ! But don't think that things will continue to be so simple... This month is going to be very interesting!  We have to congratulate you. We've been watching you and you seem to know how to handle yourself! We knew you were the one! It's time for me to give you a hint about what to expect this month. But first I'm going to tell you what you will have to get for us. This object is ... a disco sign! Good luck and don't be discouraged..

Choose life!

You read the note several times to remember every detail of it and when you looked up, you heard a click.

Instantly, you were in a bedroom with the same layout as your room from the previous month but the furniture was more modern, from the late 80s. The old wooden floor creaked with every step you took and the walls, which were quite neglected and full of cracks, echoed violently due to the music coming from upstairs. It was very annoying, so you decided to go investigate where it came from. 

You left the apartment, but not before taking the keys that were on the door and went up the stairs that led to the upper floor. The music was coming from the red door at the end of the landing. You approached the door and rang the bell, no one opened the door, you rang again, but nobody showed up. Since no one seemed to hear the bell, you started knocking on the door, louder and louder. 

You were very surprised that no one came to complain about the noise or peeked out from the knocks you were giving against the door. Either no one lived on the other floors or they didn't care about the noise at all. You looked at your wristwatch, it was two a.m. Yes, definitely no one lived there. 

Curiosity got the better of you and you tried to think of a way to open that door. You decided to kick it. In movies it always worked, right? It couldn't be that difficult. 

It was a big mistake.

You took four steps away and ran to it, when your foot hit the door, it opened wide, making you fall into the apartment. Turns out the door wasn't locked in any way. 

On the floor, you turned over to be on your back and saw that the inside door was completely bricked up with wooden boards that were nailed to the door but didn’t reach the wall. Whoever was in there, if they didn't want to be disturbed, they weren't doing anything right. 

You got up off the ground and dusted off your clothes. Good thing you were alone.

When you recovered from such humiliation, you continued your way through the house looking for the origin of the music. You crossed a corridor, letting yourself be guided by the rumbling of the walls that was getting louder, letting you know that you were getting closer. You ended up in front of a big gray, neglected door and opened it without a second thought.

When you opened the door, a strong smell of cigarettes and something stronger filled your nose, causing you to take a step back. The floor was littered with syringes, vomit puddles, and other gadgets that you couldn't describe. 

In the middle of the room, there was a young guy, with shaved hair and a yellow shirt that was slightly small, revealing his torso. The boy was unconscious, face down, he hadn’t noticed your presence yet.

You went to open the only window in the room, to ventilate and turned off the radio. 

Mission accomplished.

As soon as the young man stopped listening to the dreadful music, he began to move, lazily and turned around, letting you see that it was Mark Renton himself.

"Put the music back on." he simply said. 

"It bothered me." you replied.

Mark, not recognizing the voice that had spoken to him, turned to you, puzzled. 

"Who the hell are you?"

"My name is (y / n) and ... I live downstairs. Your music bothered me and as the door was open, I had no choice but to enter."

The boy got up, he seemed dizzy. He cursed himself for not having closed the door properly. Trudging out of his thoughts, Renton fixed his gaze on you. 

"That's illegal. You know that, love?" 

"Yeah and you’re the one who’s high as fuck in a house that I bet that isn’t even yours with the music blaring at 2 a.m."

Mark fell silent and spoke after a few seconds.

"I'm Mark, by the way, but my friends call me Renton."

"Nice to meet you, I guess." you said. 

"Same here." 

You stayed a while observing the mess on the ground. 

"Are you alone?"

"You mean if I'm single? Because in that case, yes, I am." 

"No." You giggled. "I'm asking if there's anyone else in this house. I'm saying that because this place stinks and it's cold. I think you should go down to my apartment and take a hot bath. I'll make you something to eat so you wipe off the effects of whatever you have in your body."

Mark, who was still somewhat disoriented, accepted, although it was a strange proposal since you didn’t know each other at all.

"I'm not going to do anything to you" you said, trying to reassure him. "I just want to help you." 

You took the key that was in your pants pocket, showing it to him.

As you walked down the stairs, Mark asked you:

"This building isn’t safe. How is it that a girl like you lives in a place like this? Only families with a single salary live here and young people like me who come to ... you know .." 

"I’ll only be here for a while. I usually travel a lot due to my job... I couldn't afford a better flat either." 

You came downstairs and opened the door to your apartment, inviting him inside.

"This house is very nice, it doesn't look like a rental one. Seeing how bad this building is.." he said. 

"Even if a building is 'bad', as you say, it doesn’t mean that you can’t live well." you led him to the living room. "Stay here. I'm going to go get some towels so you can take a hot bath. It'll do you good, you'll see. In the meantime, I'll fix something to eat. What would you want?"

"A sandwich would be nice.."

You nodded and headed to the bathroom. That meeting had been super strange and you didn't quite understand how you had ended up in that situation. Right now you were preparing a hot bath for Mark Renton, who was right now lying on your couch trying not to puke up. You would never have imagined that this would be your first meeting. 

After preparing the bath, you returned to the living room and saw that the boy had sat up. 

"Are you okay?" You asked him.

"It's just the side effects, I'll be fine in a few hours."

You just nodded. You didn't think this was the time to ask anything more.

"The bathtub is ready. I have left the towels right next to it. You can stay as long as you want. If you need anything, I'll be in the kitchen." 

Without saying anything else, you left the room.

While you were making two sandwiches with the few ingredients you had, Renton went into the bathroom and began to undress. He looked at the reflection of his naked body in the mirror, analyzing all the scars on his arms. Those drugs weren't doing him any good but he couldn't do anything about it. 

With a long sigh, he staggered over to the tub and crept in carefully. The water was warm, not too hot, not too cold, at a perfect temperature. Mark relaxed and allowed his eyes to close. It felt good there, because of your strange kindness. You had suddenly appeared, offering him help, just what he needed. Maybe that was going to be his new beginning, his way of being able to swim to the surface. It had been too weird to just walk away with her, but no one had treated him like this for too long and he couldn't resist.

A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts. How long had it been?

"Mark? Is everything okay?" He heard your voice on the other side of the door "I just wanted to tell you that the sandwiches are ready. You can go out whenever you want. And I have brought you a somewhat baggy T-shirt and pants that you can use as pajamas. I’m going to leave them here at the door." 

"Thank you." He replied.

You smiled to yourself, put the clothes on the door, and went back to the kitchen. A short time later, you saw him walk in and told him to sit at the table. Renton, seeing the sandwich and the tea you made for him, practically lunged for it, like he hadn't eaten in years. You laughed a bit and sat across from him. 

After several seconds in silence, you decided to speak. 

"Mark .. Can I ask you a question?" The young man nodded as he admired the food in his hands "Why are you doing this to yourself?" He stopped looking at his plate to look at you. 

"You’re asking about the injections?" You nodded slightly "It's the life I've chosen. I couldn't fill the void that keeps me from sleeping at night and drugs are the only thing that keeps me aliv ... you know?" He went silent for a few seconds "But I want to change! I want to be totally clean and have a normal life." 

"If that's what you want .." you started to say "I can help you." 

The gaze of the boy in front of you lit up.

 "Would you do that?" 

"Of course!"

[succubusphan]

Thunder Only Happens When It's Raining - CHAPTER 4

Summary: Dan meets Phil at the lowest moment in his life and is immediately enchanted by him, but nobody is perfect - not even those with good intentions and a kind heart.

This is the story of two imperfect people trying to do their best, to find love and strive in life. They gravitate towards each other at every turn, sometimes dancing in harmony, other times colliding.

Rating: E

Tags: strangers to friends, Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Break Up, they were roommates, Cheating, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, non youtuber au, Angst with a Happy Ending, there was only one bed, ok there was more than one bed but one was very very bad, cuddling for warmth, Stranded, coworkers, Jealousy, toxic relationship (not dan and Phil), everybody makes mistakes, Anxiety, Panic Attacks, alpha phil, omega dan, lots of character development for everyone, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Rimming, Oral Sex, deep throating, Shower Sex, very slight D/s dynamics, power struggle, you'll want to kill them both at some point and me too, but the end is very very worth it, Happy ending.

Word Count: 71k total, 5.6k for this chapter

A/n: This story was written for the@oldschoolpbb and it's my 100th fic (#spon). Thank you to my team! @schnaf for making the art and being my knight in shining armour as a beta, and going over the fic a million times, always encouraging me and being overall hilarious. Thank you to Mai for being a last-minute beta and providing an external analysis of the story that was incredibly helpful. And thank you @thottydan for reading and for your input.

Please, read, enjoy, kudo, comment, like, and above all share, share, share. I am but a small writer and this is my biggest project by far.

UPDATES EVERY DAY UNTIL IT'S FINISHED (THE LAST CHAPTER WILL BE POSTED ON MAY 2ND).

This story is influenced by music at every turn so make sure you check out the Spotify Playlist.

Read on ao3 | ART LINK | Start from the beginning

By the time Friday rolled around Phil was a nervous mess. Dan kept sneaking to his meetings with Charles in the mornings, coming home late and exhausted nearly at midnight, and sleeping in his own room because he didn’t want to wake Phil up. Even though Dan had apologized to him via text and he still acted normal around Phil at the office, Phil was starting to believe that Dan regretted ever sleeping with him or finally addressing their feelings and it was driving him mad.

Most days Phil was barely functional, he was taking three times longer than usual to write for his section, even having to stay behind to finish his pieces - which had never happened before. He’d thought that maybe he could stop by Charles’s office and check if Dan was ready to go home, but upon knocking on the door and not hearing a reply, he opened it and found that it was empty. With a last look around the office, Phil turned off the lights and made his way back home.

It was a long walk but he thought the air and exercise would help him clear his head. He tried not to let his imagination run wild with speculation and instead texted Dan asking him if their plans were still on. Sadly, he got no reply.

Once at home, Phil checked again and there were still no texts from Dan. He sighed and decided to take a shower, maybe put a movie on Netflix to watch as he ate his reheated dinner - alone. The fact that this was exactly what a typical night would’ve been like if Dan had never entered his life made him feel even worse. He felt pathetic, like he was losing control of his emotions, his entire mood depending on how much or how little attention Dan decided to give him - it just didn’t feel right.

Taking a few calming breaths, he closed his eyes and tried to remember the last time he’d felt happy without Dan. He remembered his late-night walks around town with his headphones, the cold air hitting his face as he watched random people enjoying their lives, letting all his frustrations melt away. It was worth a try; he put on a pair of jeans and a jacket and made his way out the door to see what the city had to offer.

He popped his headphones in and put on one of his playlists from back then, trying to emulate the experience and it kind of worked for a little bit. He had been walking for an hour or so when Dan finally answered. “I’m sorry, bub. I completely forgot. I’ll make it up to you tomorrow. Bryony has sequestered me for the night because she says I haven’t spent time with her in months and she’s right.”

Phil felt hurt and honestly mad at being treated like he was the last thing on Dan’s mind, yet he couldn’t help but smile when Dan sent a picture of him cuddling between K and Bry; their faces were squished together to fit in the frame and he was wearing Bry’s hello kitty pyjamas. “Cute,” Phil replied and let out a sad sigh. He pressed the next button on Spotify and ‘With or without you’ started playing, pulling at his heartstrings.

He looked up, watching the couples walking hand in hand down the street and wished Dan was here instead of spending his time with everyone else, leaving him for last.

“Through the storm, we reach the shore

You give it all but I want more

And I’m waiting for you.”

He turned around the corner and saw one of the pubs he used to visit when he felt lonely, just to sit by the bar to have a drink and listen to music. A drink would probably suit him right now, but maybe it wasn’t such a good idea.

“With or without you

With or without you, ah, ah

I can’t live

With or without you.”

Phil’s phone vibrated with a Twitter notification. He’d gotten a dm from an account he didn’t recognise. There was no text, only four pictures of Dan with Charles clearly taken on different days. The first one having a coffee at Starbucks, another walking down the street and smiling, the next one of Charles putting his hand on Dan’s lower back as they entered the building where Dan saw his therapist and the last one of them having dinner at a nice restaurant. The first three pictures bothered him but were innocent enough, but the last one was from today judging by Dan’s outfit; they had a bottle of champagne on the table and they were holding hands, Dan’s eyes looking adoringly into Charles’s.

“And you give yourself away

And you give yourself away

And you give

And you give

And you give yourself away.”

Phil blocked the account and locked his phone before walking into the pub.

There were only a few tables taken, the chatter was quiet enough that the music was at a nice volume and the bartender working today was one he recognised from previous visits. Phil decided to sit by the bar to avoid feeling like a loser sitting alone at a table because he’d been stood up; this way he could be a loser with someone to talk to. He removed his headphones and put them in his pocket but the song continued to play in his head as he drank his first gin and tonic of the night.

The blonde guy with bright blue eyes sitting on the stool next to his seemed to be in his third or fourth drink already when he said hi to Phil. According to what he was telling the bartender, he had apparently gone through a bad breakup but was in a celebratory mood nonetheless - or perhaps that was just the alcohol talking. “Fuck love, am I right?” He’d said and both Phil and the bartender nodded quietly. Phil downed his second drink and ordered a new one. “That one is on me,” said the guy. Phil tried to refuse but he was having none of it so he accepted the offer. It was getting late and Phil knew that he should probably consider returning home, but he was feeling low and ‘blonde guy’ was eyeing him with interest.

“My hands are tied

My body bruised, she got me with

Nothing to win and

Nothing left to lose.”

Phil’s phone vibrated in his pocket and he pulled it out to check his notifications; Dan had posted a story to Instagram, it was a selfie of him smirking with the caption “I’ve changed my mind” and the song ‘Erase and Rewind’ from The Cardigans playing on top. Clutching at his glass just a little bit tighter, Phil closed his eyes and let the floaty feeling of being drunk overwhelm his senses for a moment until he felt a tap on the shoulder.

“Are you ok?” ‘blonde guy’ asked.

“No, someone broke my heart,” Phil said.

“Yeah, me too.” The guy bit his lip and seemed to consider things for a moment before saying: “Wanna go somewhere?”

Phil shrugged and the guy slowly leaned in for a kiss. Phil didn’t move, neither to respond nor to stop him. It felt - wrong. “I shouldn’t,” Phil said, his lips mere millimeters away from the guy.

“Why, do you have someone waiting for you at home?” he asked.

Phil shook his head no and kissed the guy back.

“And you give yourself away

And you give yourself away

And you give

And you give

And you give yourself away.”

The rest of the night consisted of flashes. Making out in the elevator, stumbling and undressing each other, getting to bed and letting his body take over, pushing into the stranger with abandon and sobbing in his arms after.

“With or without you

With or without you, oh

I can’t live

With or without you.”

--

Dan walked in quite early the next morning. He knew he had neglected Phil for the past couple of days but he was going to pamper him and spend the next few days with him to make up for it. Now that he had helped Charles meet his deadline, he could focus fully on their new ‘sort of relationship.’ Even though he’d been reticent to put a name to it, he realised now that it was time to leave the past in the past and judge Phil solely for the behaviour he had exhibited instead of being too careful because of his own previous experiences. Life was just too short to be afraid to live and love.

Sadly, things don’t always go according to plan; at least not for Dan. As soon as he opened the door he was met with a path of wrinkled clothes he recognised as Phil’s leading up to his bedroom. He followed the trail, his stomach sinking more and more with each step; first, he noticed the smell of alcohol, then the smell of sex and sweat, then… a brief sense of relief washed over him when he found Phil sleeping fully naked, yet alone, but it was short-lived. There was a glass of water on the bedside table with a note that read “Tom, 20-719-3000. Call me.”

Dan couldn’t believe he had fallen for it again; he felt like an idiot, but this time he wasn’t to take it. He grabbed the glass of water and poured it all over Phil’s face, startling him awake.

“I can’t believe I fell for your shit,” Dan said, his voice laced with anger and grief.

Phil blinked, reaching for his glasses. “Dan! I - what?”

“You didn’t need to lie to me and pretend to want me if you just wanted a fuck!”

“What are you talking about?”

“You cheated on me!”

“Me? You were fucking Charles!” Phil mumbled.

Dan’s mouth opened and closed but no sounds came out. That was the most ridiculous thing he had ever heard. He was about to explain himself when he realised that he didn’t need to. “Whatever helps you sleep at night,” he spat. “You’re a piece of shit, just like Alex.”

Phil looked as if he’d been slapped, his anger seemingly having melted away.

“Dan, I -”

“I don’t want to hear it. I literally don’t care,” Dan said and stormed out of the flat.

--

Phil felt like utter shit for more reasons than one. He felt betrayed yet disgusted for not having discussed things with Dan instead of making stupid decisions in a moment of weakness.

He’d tried calling Dan all weekend but he was going straight into voicemail and his texts were not even delivered; it seemed like he’d been blocked already. His mind kept going over the events of Friday night over and over, like an involuntary form of self-punishment; he couldn’t keep the fragmented memories at bay.

Phil’s only hope was catching Dan alone, be honest with him and hope that he was willing to forgive him - or face the consequences of his actions. He was still unsure on whether Dan had cheated on him with Charles or not but he was so desperate to keep Dan around that he was willing to forgive him if that was the case. Somewhere along the past seven months, Phil had fallen in love with his best friend. He had hoped Dan would say yes to being his partner but now… Phil didn’t know how bad he had fucked up his chance.

On Monday, he took a shower and two painkillers for the hangover he was still nursing before rushing to work in a taxi. Phil looked around the office but neither Dan nor Bryony were there. It seemed like Charles was his only option, which made Phil feel awkward as hell, but he couldn’t be picky. He could see through the blinds in the office that Charles was on a call, so to make their talk as short as possible, Phil hung around in the hallway sipping on his coffee until he was done.

Putting on a neutral face, Phil knocked on the door and waited to be called.

“Hi, Phil! How are you doing?” Charles smiled and signalled at him to come in.

“Good, good,” Phil replied stiffly. “How are you?” He attempted a smile.

“Great, just a bit exhausted because of work and my personal projects, but I’m luckily done with that for the most part,” Charles said. “What can I do for you?”

Phil took a sit and tried not to let his mind linger on that comment. He needed to focus on the task at hand. “I was wondering if you had seen Dan.”

Charles’s face fell, worry lines appearing in his brow. “Oh, I’m afraid he’s not coming. He said that he was not feeling well and asked for three days of sick leave and I of course said yes. He’s been working so much lately, it will do him good to rest and focus on his health.”

Phil’s face fell. “Oh, so he’ll be back on Thursday?”

“Yeah, it seems like it.” Charles leaned forward, linking his fingers together and setting them on the desk. “Didn’t he tell you about it?”

“Uh, no. He’s staying at Bry’s for a few days,” Phil lied. “I guess he forgot to tell me.”

Charles nodded. “Probably, he sounded quite distraught.”

Phil stood up. “Yeah, I’ll text him to see how he’s feeling. Thanks.”

“No problem,” said Charles, already taking another call.

--

Actually, Dan was back the following day, just after their shift had ended.

Phil had tried to contact Dan again but to no avail, so he decided that the best course of action was to pour his heart and soul into his work. On Tuesday, he stayed overtime to finish his next piece and probably start something new. Around five-thirty, he took a coffee break and went to the bathroom to wash his hands when he heard voices.

He recognised Dan’s voice immediately and gasped. Then, he carefully pushed the door open the tiniest bit and craned his neck until he finally caught sight of Dan walking into Charles’s office. He looked absolutely gorgeous; he had clearly spent some time getting ready before dropping in. Phil felt like his heart was trying to crawl out of his body via his throat but did his best to calm down and listen to their conversation. If Dan wasn’t going to give him any answers willingly, maybe this would be his only chance to know what had really happened. He pushed the door further the slightest bit to get a better view of what they were doing.

Charles sat on his chair with a bright smile and Dan stood beside him looking tired but attempting a smile.

“Thank you for giving me the days off, but I think I’m doing better already and focusing on work would really help me find some semblance of peace in my life. I’ll be back tomorrow.”

“Of course, of course. You know that I’m here for you whenever you need me, just like you were there for me.” Charles said.

Dan sat on the corner of Charles’s desk. “Yeah. Don’t worry, I really enjoyed helping you.”

“About Friday...” Charles shook his head. “I would like to know where we stand - if you don’t mind.”

“It’s all good. I was kinda seeing someone but that’s over, so…”

“Oh, I wasn’t aware.” Charles paused. “So?”

“So…about what happened -” Dan grabbed Charles’s tie and pulled him closer. Phil could no longer see their faces from this angle but he could definitely see Charles’s hand on Dan’s hips and it was making his blood boil. “I am free if you want to have some fun.” Dan climbed onto Charles’s lap.

“Oh!” Charles laughed. “I want more than a little fun,” he said huskily and kissed Dan.

Phil’s heart broke into a million pieces but he couldn’t look away.

Dan moaned and started to grind on the alpha, moaning and kissing him harshly, the chair creaking under their movements.

It was wrong; so wrong. Phil finally closed the bathroom door and pressed his back to the wall but he could still hear them, so he covered his ears. So many thoughts ran through his mind that he could barely catch on. He stood there, frozen in shock for what seemed like forever but was probably five minutes until the bathroom door opened, startling him.

Dan’s face was red, his curls sticking to his sweaty forehead, a dark hickey marking his pale neck. “Oh, you’re still here,” he said, his eyes carrying nothing but disdain.

Phil pinned him against the wall and kissed him hungrily. Dan opened his lips for him and kissed him back for a moment before turning his face away. Still, Phil sucked on his neck on the same exact point where Charles had marked him, attempting to stake his own claim.

Dan moaned and shivered. “Stop,” he said.

Phil jumped back as if he’d been burned, but he needed to finally address this. “We need to talk about this. I - I know I fucked up, we’ve both made mistakes but I think we can fix it.”

Dan’s eyes narrowed. “Fuck off! I did nothing wrong, so there’s nothing to talk about. It’s over.”

This couldn’t be happening. This wasn’t how things were supposed to go. They could fix it if they just… talked. “Please,” Phil sank to his knees. “Please,” he choked in a sob.

Dan looked away. “There’s no fixing this. You cheated on me. I’m done.” His tone turned cold and distant.

“I know, I was stupid. I was weak,” Phil said, tears running down his cheeks. “I just couldn’t deal with you ignoring me and forgetting about me.”

Where Dan’s expression had softened slightly when Phil begged, now it had morphed into one of pure rage. “You’re not going to turn this around and fucking blame me. I left you alone for one night and you fucked someone in our home.”

“I’m not.” Phil raised his hands in surrender. “I’m t-trying to explain -”

“Great, then fucking explain. I would love to understand,” Dan spat. “And get up.”

Phil got shakily up to his feet. “I’d been doubting your feelings for me a-and I wanted to talk about it but you were never there. And you kept ignoring me and forgot I existed - then someone sent me pictures,” he sobbed. “You said you were with Bry, but someone sent me a few pictures of you o-on a date with Charles.”

Dan frowned. “Who sent those pictures?

“I don’t know, some Twitter account I didn’t follow.”

“So someone tries to imply that I was fucking Charles behind your back and instead of telling me about it you decided to get your petty revenge. Is that it?”

Phil shook his head. “No, no - I swear. I wanted to have a drink at a pub but when I saw the pictures I freaked out. I brought someone home, but I wasn’t thinking. I would have never done that if I hadn’t thought you were cheating on me with Charles.”

“So you’re the victim here, huh?” Dan was visibly shaking with rage. Phil lowered his head but Dan pressed on. “Tell me what you did, I want to know.”

Phil whipped the tears away. “We talked and drank, then - It’s kind of blurry,” he admitted. “We had sex.”

Dan pulled Phil by the shirt and leaned in closer and closer until their lips were almost touching. “Don’t be shy,” he spat. “Tell me: Was he as good as me? Did he make you scream like a little bitch?”

Phil avoided his eyes but shook his head no.

“Was it worth it?” Dan said and sucked on Phil’s neck hard enough to leave a lasting mark before stepping away.

Phil gasped, he hated himself for appreciating the way Dan had claimed him with that simple gesture. “No, nothing is worth losing you,” he said. Still, Dan kept avoiding his questions and that was starting to annoy him. “What about you? Did you fuck Charles?”

Dan snorted humorlessly. “Of course not, what do you take me for?”

Phil frowned. “Then why did you spend so much time with him then? You live with me and I haven’t seen you in a week.”

“He’s writing a book so he asked me to go over his final edit with him and he thanked me with a nice dinner,” Dan said, his eyes pinning Phil in place. “The deadline was on Saturday,” he added. “Not all of us think with our cocks, unlike you.”

Unsure on whether he believed Dan or not, Phil pressed. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why did I see pictures of you going everywhere with Charles; you took him to all the places I usually walk you to. Instead of spending time with me when you were done, you chose to stay with him every single day and you cancelled on our date too.” Now Phil was getting angry as well. “You replaced me and you didn’t even have the balls to tell me.”

Dan blinked. “I needed to think, and I’m glad I did because now I know not to waste my time with you.”

“You don’t have to be so fucking spiteful.” Phil took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to regain his composure. “I don’t think we should throw away all of our history for stupid mistakes. I know that I fucked up and I’m sorry, I’ll apologize as many times as you need me to, but I don’t think we should ignore the feelings we have for each other over this.”

Dan shrugged. “That’s where you’re wrong. Any feelings I might have had for you died the moment you went behind my back and fucked some random bitch you found on the street.” Dan pointed at him, pressing his index finger into Phil’s chest repeatedly as his tone got more and more heated. “You knew how much I suffered when Alex did that to me, but you sat there and pretended to be my friend, you held me when I cried about it and the moment -the-fucking-moment I let you fuck me, you take your little ‘good guy’ persona and go find someone else because I dared to be busy for a week,” Dan said through gritted teeth. “Make it make sense!”

Phil was having none of it. “You say that, feeling all high and mighty when you just humped the guy you spent a week with two days after we had an argument; allow me to doubt that it’s the first time you’ve done that. And you knew I used to have feelings for Charles but you did it anyway because you’re a spiteful little bitch. You wanted to hurt me back, well congratulations, it fucking worked.”

Dan looked as if he was going to argue back, but in the end, he shrugged. “You know what? You can think whatever the fuck you want, I don’t care anymore.” He smirked knowing he was about to deliver the final blow to Phil’s heart. “You are nothing to me.”

“Then leave. Move out,” Phil said but he didn’t mean it, not really. Even now he didn’t want to put Dan in a position where he had nowhere to live, so he rushed to add: “You can take some time to find a new flat, but I think it’s best if we don’t live together anymore.”

Dan rolled his eyes. “Bryony and K are moving me out of your flat as we speak. I have a lease to my name already. If you thought I spent the weekend crying and waiting for the moment we met again to take your sorry ass back, you were wrong,” he smirked. “Now, if you excuse me, I have a date to get ready for.” Dan turned around and took a step towards the door but Phil caught him by the wrist.

Phil felt the vitriol in his chest making its way to his lips and before he could think about it, he said: “Yeah, go do some ‘under the desk’ overtime; see if it can get you another promotion.”

Dan twisted Phil’s wrist in the opposite direction, freeing himself from the hold and walked away. “Fuck you!” he said over his shoulder just as the door closed.

--

That night Phil sat on the floor of Dan’s empty bedroom, drinking some gin and tonic and feeling sorry for himself as he scrolled on Dan’s social media accounts. At first, there was nothing new, but then he posted a picture looking like the embodiment of sex with black leather trousers and a black silk shirt with the caption “Going out tonight.” Then, two other selfies followed, and then a video of him giving the camera the middle finger and mouthing the lyrics to the song “I hate boys” by Christina Aguilera with the caption “I hate boys, but boys love me. I think they suck and my friends agree.”

It was well within his right to do what he wanted, but Phil did resent the fact that Dan was doing this purposely to hurt him. Yes, he had made a mistake and caused Dan a lot of hurt - despite him trying to pretend that he wasn’t - but he had not done so on purpose. It just happened. Phil sighed sadly.

Maybe this was for the best; maybe Dan was not the person Phil had thought he was, and he had clearly not been ready for a committed relationship like the one Phil was looking for. He took another swig from his drink and remembered the sweet omega from the pub. He got up and padded to his bedroom, opening his bedside table drawer and fishing the paper with his phone number out and writing a quick text.

“Hi Tom, it’s Phil. From the pub.”

“Ah, I get to know your name at long last. I thought you weren’t going to text me.”

“Sorry! I was going through some stuff.”

“Aren’t we all? Don’t worry about it. Are you still feeling shit?”

“I am, but I have drinks and I was hoping you’d come over and make me feel better.”

“Interesting offer. Will you make me breakfast in the morning?”

“I’ll make you lunch too if you want.”

“Remind me the address and I’ll be there in half an hour.”

--

Tom came into Phil’s life at the right time. His dark humour and independent personality were just what Phil needed. Tom had a talent for being there for the times where Phil needed someone around, to feel less lonely, to feel wanted, provide him with the cuddles and kisses he so desperately craved but allowing him to have his space too. If he texted Phil and he noticed that he was not excited to hang out, he would simply tell him they could meet another day. He was honestly a blessing; especially with how things were unfolding.

Dan had absolutely no mercy for him. He kept posting picture after picture of him looking incredibly sexy, sometimes using sheer shirts and displaying his nipples, other times exposing his neck and biting his lip, and a few that looked outright like post-sex selfies, a lazy smile on his lips, sweaty fringe sticking to his forehead hickeys all over his neck and chest. But that wasn’t all, he posted story after story with song lyrics in a mix of bitterness laced with narcissism and gloating about fucking everyone he could get his hands on. The final nail in the coffin was him singing ‘You outta know,’ particularly with the caption “And every time I scratch my nails down someone else’s back I hope you feel it,” followed by a picture of him and Charles kissing at a club with the caption “Look at what the cat dragged in.”

Phil knew he’d been right all along mere days later when one of the receptionists let him know that Dan had notified the company of his relationship with Charles; it was official. He smiled bitterly thinking back to the night at the Skybar when Dan had said he wasn’t ready to use any labels for them, now, not a month later he had clearly gotten over that hesitation to be with Charles.

--

Dan climbed out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his waist and looked in the mirror, tracing his fingers over all the love bites and the bruises adorning his chest with a smile. He was absolutely living for enticing sweet Charles to come out of his shell and join his wildest side. Yes, he had gotten himself a perfectly polite and vanilla boyfriend but also yes, the man could be guided in the right direction. If he really stopped to think about his feelings, he could have said that he was still devastated about -

But that was the secret; to avoid thinking. And he had mastered the art in the past few weeks. His various sex partners had kept him occupied enough to stay afloat emotionally, to feel wanted; but Charles had swept in like a knight in shining armour to really give him what he had been craving: stability, respect, reliability and above all as much sex as he wanted. The man was always up for it, he couldn’t get enough of Dan. He had mentioned that he was glad they finished the final review of his book draft before they got together or they would have never finished and Dan was inclined to agree.

Charles was really something else. Not only did he treat Dan adoringly but he had waited for Dan to be done fucking around after… what happened. He had asked Dan to be his boyfriend right away, but he understood that Dan needed to deal with his feelings as he saw fit and he said that he was free to do so. He was the perfect man.

There was a knock on the door. “Love? Breakfast is ready!”

Dan smiled and dropped the towel before opening the door. “What a coincidence, I’m most definitely ready to eat it.”

Charles’s eyes travelled up and down his body before grabbing Dan’s ass and pulling him flush to him. “You -” he said and bit Dan’s lip, “are insatiable,” Charles smirked.

“There’s no such thing as too much of a good thing.”

“Have mercy on me, my legs can barely hold me,” Charles pouted but still pressed his leg to Dan’s half-hard cock.

Dan didn’t waste time and rolled his hips against him. “Well, I guess you’ll have to just lay there let me ride you, don’t you think?”

“Hmm, sounds like the perfect weekend plan, but now we need to have breakfast and go to work.”

Dan pouted and made his best attempt at doe eyes. “Will you suck me off while I drink my coffee?”

Charles threw his head back with a laugh. “Absolutely.”

Their breakfast was quite enjoyable but Dan’s day went sour quite fast. He decided to wait outside the building and scroll on his phone while Charles went to get the car and he got a nasty surprise.

“I see you’re whoring out again. Hasn’t this one gotten bored of you yet?” A voice said.

Every single hair on Dan’s body stood before he even looked up. “What are you doing here, Alex? What do you want?” he said, trying to sound unbothered when he felt actually quite the opposite. He briefly considered dialling 999 but decided to put his phone away instead; it was time to face his biggest fear.

“I came to give you another chance to return to me; to see how wrong you were to leave,” Alex said with his classic air of superiority.

Dan laughed humorlessly. “Please,” he rolled his eyes. “Don’t hold your breath - or do and choke already, you’d be doing me a favour.”

“You’re going to regret walking away from our relationship,” Alex spat. “You’ll never find anyone who treats you like I did.”

“I sure hope not! You’re nothing but a little bitch with an inflated ego, a god complex and a small cock - and let me tell you, you come way too soon. I am done with your shit and I’m done going to the bathroom to finish myself off because you’re useless.” Dan turned around and tried to walk away but Alex caught him by the wrist.

“Where do you think you’re going? I’m not done with you!” He tightened his hold on Dan’s hand enough that it was quite painful. “You think you’re so special but everyone cheats on you because you’re worthless; this one will cheat on you too.”

Suddenly, Dan realised exactly what Alex was saying. He had been the one feeding bullshit to Phil, thinking that Dan would crawl back to him, but he had a surprise coming. Dan tried to twist his wrist but Alex was stronger, so he simply punched the bastard on the nose. He briefly wondered if his therapist would chastise him for feeling happy when he heard the crunching noise.

Alex stumbled back clutching at his nose. “Fuck! What the fuck, Dan?”

“Touch me again and you’ll regret it,” Dan said, trying not to flinch even though his hand was starting to throb. “I don’t want to see you ever again. Is that clear?”

“I guess you’re not the kind of person I thought you were,” Alex said as he stumbled away, trying to make it sound like an insult but it was the biggest compliment Dan had ever received.

Dan smiled. “Damn right. I’m not, bitch.”

Charles pulled up and opened the door for him. “Ready, love?”

“Of course!” Dan got into the car without a backwards glance. It had been a scary experience, but the fact that he had been able to fend for himself really helped him to feel safer. He didn’t need an alpha to protect him, he could do that all by himself.

Next Chapter

[skzhocomments]

Broken hearts can heal - Choi Minho SHINee Fanfic (COMPLETED) - Story Masterlist

Pairing: Minho (of SHINee) x OC (name: Da-Eun. The story is written in 2nd person, so there's lots of yous)

Genre: angst, romance, fluff, mature

Word Count: ~32k

Warnings: mature, swearing, feelings of hopelessness, angst, depression, pregnancy, death, crying, explicit sexual content, and others.

This is just a story that doesn’t describe SHINee members' true characters in any way. It’s just a product of my imagination and should be treated as such.

This story is also on Wattpad (click here) and AO3 (click here)

A/N: As any other writer out there, I would appreciate reblogs and your comments on this story. Please let me know if you enjoyed it, and most importantly, have fun!

---

Summary:

Your life has always been far from ideal; a never ending struggle, daily shifts at the restaurant just to get some money to pursue your dream of studying psychology. It's been hard, except for the last few months. Ever since you met him, you've been truly happy. A house, a baby on the way… everything fell into place somehow, and for the first time in your life you felt that things were perfect. Until they weren't. Everything changed in the blink of an eye. You've been taught time and time again that life couldn't be perfect. Why did you think it's going to be different this time?

This story is a rollercoaster of emotions that's going to bring you an existential crisis since you'll be feeling every negative and positive emotions one can feel while reading.

It will be divided into more parts.

The story and cover are original and my property. Any similarities to other stories are purely coincidental. Da-Eun, the protagonist, is a made-up character. SHINee members or any other famous people mentioned along this story DO NOT represent their true character in any way, they are simply mentioned in order to provide a visual representation for the readers. Their personas obviously have nothing to do with their true personalities. They're just characters I've created for this story, so please don't take this too seriously.

Mature content ahead. 18+

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Chapter I - How we all met - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter II - Gifts around the dinner table - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter III - In the blink of an eye - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter IV - Home is a person - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter V - An oddly familiar feeling - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter VI - The Birth - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter VII - Exhaustion - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter VIII - Are you moving on? - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter IX - Losing your temper - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter X - Make up - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter XI - Surprise visit - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter XII - Company dinner - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter XIII - Late Honeymoon - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter IV - Today marks one year - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter XV - Three years later (Final Chapter) - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

[succubusphan]

Thunder Only Happens When It's Raining - CHAPTER 6

Summary: Dan meets Phil at the lowest moment in his life and is immediately enchanted by him, but nobody is perfect - not even those with good intentions and a kind heart.

This is the story of two imperfect people trying to do their best, to find love and strive in life. They gravitate towards each other at every turn, sometimes dancing in harmony, other times colliding.

Rating: E

Tags: strangers to friends, Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, Break Up, they were roommates, Cheating, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, non youtuber au, Angst with a Happy Ending, there was only one bed, ok there was more than one bed but one was very very bad, cuddling for warmth, Stranded, coworkers, Jealousy, toxic relationship (not dan and Phil), everybody makes mistakes, Anxiety, Panic Attacks, alpha phil, omega dan, lots of character development for everyone, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Rimming, Oral Sex, deep throating, Shower Sex, very slight D/s dynamics, power struggle, you'll want to kill them both at some point and me too, but the end is very very worth it, Happy ending.

Word Count: 71k total, 3.5k for this chapter

A/n: This story was written for the@oldschoolpbb and it's my 100th fic (#spon). Thank you to my team!@schnaf for making the art and being my knight in shining armour as a beta, and going over the fic a million times, always encouraging me and being overall hilarious. Thank you to Mai for being a last-minute beta and providing an external analysis of the story that was incredibly helpful. And thank you@thottydan for reading and for your input.

Please, read, enjoy, kudo, comment, like, and above all share, share, share. I am but a small writer and this is my biggest project by far.

UPDATES EVERY DAY UNTIL IT'S FINISHED (THE LAST CHAPTER WILL BE POSTED ON MAY 2ND).

This story is influenced by music at every turn so make sure you check out the Spotify Playlist.

Read on ao3 | ART LINK | Start from the beginning

Dan woke up smiling the next day. He decided to text Greg and got a reply instantly. The conversation carried effortlessly all through breakfast and right up to when he got on the tube. It was a weird feeling, really, Dan couldn’t believe that he had actually missed public transport; that moment of peace with his own thoughts and music used to be the source of his best ideas. His good mood was short-lived though. As soon as he got to work, Phil called him into his office and closed the door behind them. Dan couldn’t help but notice how pale and tired he looked and briefly wondered if he was ill.

“What do you want?” Dan asked, crossing his arms. They were alone, Phil’s interns nowhere to be seen, so no need to pretend.

Phil smirked. “I just wanted to say that I think you are a hypocrite and I have zero respect for your holier than thou attitude. I knew I was right all those years ago and I finally confirmed it.”

“What are you on about?” Dan frowned.

“I saw you at Moulin Rouge, basically humping another guy.” Phil quirked an eyebrow. “Does Charles know about your little escapades?”

Dan huffed. It was too fucking early for this. “Why do you care? That is only between Charles and me.”

“I don’t. I just wanted to tell you that you can finally drop the act and stop pretending that you never cheat, you’re not fooling anyone. You hop from one dick to the other without hesitation, I’m shocked that you manage to get any work done with how much time you spend on your back.”

Dan’s stomach twisted into knots. It wasn’t true, he hadn’t cheated, but the fact that Phil still thought about him as a cheater made him feel disgusting for some reason. And even though he had never been conflicted about loving sex or getting what he wanted, being judged by Phil was just too much for Dan to handle - but he wasn’t about to let him know that his comment had stung. “I fuck whoever I want and when I want to because that is my right, and to be perfectly honest, I find it a bit creepy that you take so much notice of who my cock pulses for - your misogyny is showing. Better go keep tabs on the little whore you have at home, you wouldn’t want him to find a better man and leave you like I did.”

Phil’s face went from triumphant to indignant, but before he could answer, there was a knock on the door. “Yes?” Phil snapped.

It was one of Phil’s interns, Tim or something. “Uh, Mister Edwards and Mister O’Malley are waiting for you in Charles’s office,” he said, looking between them with wide eyes.

Dan paled and made eye contact with Phil who looked about ready to be sick. They shared a confused look before walking to said office. Dan shut his eyes and took a deep breath, willing all the gods listening to please let him keep his job. In the almost four years he had worked there he had met Edwards and O’Malley once and that had been when they expanded the magazine, switched things around to appeal to a younger audience while keeping their more mature pool of readers. They’d been delighted with him and Charles at the time, but he couldn’t imagine what they could possibly want with him and Phil of all people. Whatever happened, he hoped that Charles could vouch for him.

They knocked on the door and waited to be called. Dan wished a hole in the ground would open and let him fall straight into hell.

“Come in, please.”

Upon opening the door, Dan discovered that his worst nightmare had come true. Charles was not there; only the executives sitting side by side on Charles’s spot and two empty chairs on the opposite side of the desk.

“Gentlemen,” said O’Malley with a nod.

“Good morning,” added Edwards. “Sit - please.” He gestured to the empty seats.

“Good morning, sirs,” Dan smiled.

“Hello, gentlemen. What can we do for you?” Phil asked, taking the lead of the conversation, which Dan immediately resented.

Edwards sighed deeply. “I’m afraid our magazine is going through a difficult time and we need to solve all the issues immediately. Reports of horrible working conditions and an all-time low team morale have reached us so we sought Charles’s opinion. The problem is that while he left behind a list of things he thought needed to be resolved, doing so without him will be quite tricky; that’s where you come in. As editors of our most-read sections and the employees with more responsibilities and seniority in the staff, we are asking you to help us smooth things out.”

Dan frowned. “Well - While I’m of course willing to help with whatever the magazine needs, I need to ask, why would we need to solve these issues without Charles? He’s our editor in chief, with even more experience and seniority than either of us.”

Phil stayed quiet, but in his defence, he nodded along.

O’Malley rolled his chair forward and leaned in over the desk as if he was about to drop the secret of the century on them. “Charles quit. His last day in this office was Friday, didn’t you know?”

“He - he didn’t tell me, I’m afraid,” Dan said, averting his eyes. “Did he say why?”

“He had reached as far as he could in the company, there was no place to grow, so he could either transfer to a different sector of the company or leave, and he decided on the latter. He said there was some personal stuff he needed to work on and he had a desire to move on to publishing,” Edwards said.

“Oh,” Dan said, not knowing what to add. He kept his eyes on his lap, focusing on the way his hands twisted nervously even though he could feel Phil’s eyes boring holes on his head.

Phil cleared his throat. “Charles will be missed; he was a great boss and a very important asset to the company, but we are here to help with anything you need. What can we do for the magazine?”

“I’m glad you asked, Phil,” said O’Malley. “We’ve had quite a few instances of employees requesting mental health days, which of course exist for a reason, we want our people to be as healthy and happy as possible since it makes for a better magazine - Charles showed us the statistics of it. The problem is that, as we said, team morale is at an all-time low, the tension and the level of stress in this office make it impossible for people to work in peace and we can’t allow that to continue.”

Dan swallowed thick, this was it. If they didn’t get fired on the spot, they would get yelled at and he didn’t know which he preferred.

“Yes, Herbert is correct. When we asked Charles to recommend someone as his replacement he named both of you but he also mentioned that the horrible arguments you two have keep everyone on their toes; that most of the stress problems of the entire team would be resolved if you worked on the personal issues you have.”

“I think that’s a bit of an exaggeration,” Dan mumbled.

Edwards grabbed a sheet of paper from the desk and read: “Someone in the finance section quit and cited ‘the editors from the Current World Issues and Culture sections constant bickering stresses me to the point where it reminds me of my parents’ divorce’ as the reason she was leaving the company, but added that you were both ‘very talented and hard-working as well as incredibly sweet people when not around each other.’ So no, we don’t think this is an exaggeration.” He passed the resignation notice to Dan.

Dan grabbed the piece of paper and sank in his chair as he confirmed what it said; he felt so ashamed. Charles had told him that they needed to stop this years ago but he had ignored him. If he was honest with himself, even though he respected Charles greatly, the moment they started dating, Dan had stopped listening to his disciplinary comments. He’d always thought his opinion of his rows with Phil carried a personal weight more than professional concern. Apparently, he had been wrong. “We - we can work on that,” Dan said.

Phil snorted and rolled his eyes but his face dropped when the executives looked at him disapprovingly. “Sorry. Sure, we can work on that.”

“I’m glad that you agree. We are celebrating the tenth anniversary of the magazine by renting a ski lodge at the bottom of the Swiss Alps for everyone to enjoy for a week; we will be there as well, of course. All expenses will be covered and any transportation fees will be refunded to you in your next paycheck. Since this would be a bonding activity we recommend that everyone shares cars and have a nice drive together,” said O’Malley.

Edwards nodded. “Yes, in fact, I recommend that you two take this opportunity to talk things out. There’s nothing more relaxing than a nice long drive, seeing all the differences from country to country, listening to music and chatting. We cannot impose this on you, but let me make this very clear: come Christmas you will have resolved this and one of you will be the new editor in chief, or you both will be fired.”

“O-ok. I- of course,” said Dan.

“I can drive,” said Phil. Dan gave him a look and he frowned. “What? I bought an old car to drive around on the weekends.”

Dan shrugged. “I didn’t know you could drive,” he said keeping his tone as unassuming as he could.

“Perfect,” O’Malley said with a clap. “We will see you there. You will get all the details of the recommended routes to take, the ferris and what interesting places you can stop along the way.”

Dan knew he was in deep shit, but he couldn’t let this go without asking. “Before we go, I would like to ask - Why wasn’t Bryony up for consideration?”

“She was. We called her to this meeting but she demanded to know what it was about in advance and then said that she had no interest in being editor in chief, particularly when that would mean handling two ‘adult toddlers,’ and we know she’s a very determined lady so we decided to respect her wishes,” said Edwards avoiding any kind of eye contact with them.

Dan laughed. “Yes, we’ve been friends since primary school and she has always been a very determined lady.” He would make sure to tease Bryony about terrifying the executives just because they offered her a better position; he couldn’t wait to share this with K.

--

Phil drove home and parked just a few meters from his building. As he made his way home, he couldn’t help but think back to all the times he crossed that threshold with a smile and with Dan by his side; it had been so long ago. It felt like a different life almost, or perhaps a different universe; one where they were still best friends and partners as it should be now.

He entered the elevator, pressed the button and leaned against the wall, shutting his eyes. He could still see Dan, clear as day, with his rosy cheeks and his cute smile, wearing a fancy suit, looking like an absolute angel, kissing him, looking at him fondly - loving him. Phil sighed wistfully. It was no secret that he’d made mistakes that still hurt, but the hate Dan held for him really did break his heart at every turn. It was out of hurt that he lashed out on the few occasions he did, but he tried to not retaliate against Dan’s attacks.

Dan had spent the past few years making sure that Phil was as unhappy as possible, not only letting him know that he would never forgive him as a partner or friend but also going out of his way to ruin the only relationship he had left. Wasn’t it enough that he had lost all his friends for his mistakes? Did Dan want him to die alone and miserable as well?

The elevator opened with a ding and with a turn of the key, he was home. The flat felt cold and empty; Tom’s sweet smile no longer there to make his days better. Phil couldn’t believe it had been over a month already; his days merged together in a blur of work and sleepless nights, wishing he had someone to hold, someone to kiss, someone to love. The first time it poured after Tom left, Phil had cried himself to sleep, thinking of the only time he’d felt safe during a storm: the one he spent in Dan’s embrace.

‘Maybe I’m just not a good person. Maybe I don’t deserve to be loved,’ Phil thought as he made himself a gin and tonic.

He could still remember Tom’s devastated eyes when he was finally brave enough to ask what he needed to know.

Phil walked into their room and found Tom moving the furniture around and touching the walls, his fingers tracing the dents he found there. “Babe, should I order us a pizza?” Phil asked.

Tom froze, his head turning towards Phil but his fingers still connected to the dent on the wall. “Hmm?”

“Should I order us a pizza?” Phil repeated

Tom didn’t answer, instead, he looked at the wall. “What happened to the wall? It’s dented.”

Phil shrugged. “I don’t know, I never noticed.”

Tom looked into his eyes curiously. “It looks like something made out of wood did it and left a bit of colour on the wall.”

“Oh yeah, I guess that’s from when I moved my bed to the office. I just probably messed up the wall trying to put it back in here.”

Tom hummed.

“If you hate it I can just patch the wall and paint over it,” Phil smiled.

Tom looked at him with a vacant expression. “Why did you have your bed in the office?”

Phil leaned against the wall and sighed, he hated those memories. “Remember I’ve mentioned having a roommate? Well, I gave them the master bedroom with the ensuite while they lived here. When they moved out I just moved back into my room and my office to the other room. Why?”

“You never told me that your roommate was Dan,” Tom said, his tone much more accusatory than before.

Phil blinked at him. “It never came up.”

“It-never-came-up…” Tom enunciated. “It never came up that the guy that makes your life a living hell, the one you constantly talk about was your so-called ‘roommate;’ I wonder if he has any relation to the guy who you said was cheating on you when we met?”

“It doesn’t matter, Tom,” Phil huffed. “What happened before we got together doesn’t matter. I’m with you now and you are with me. Our exes have nothing to do with our relationship.”

“Well, mine surely doesn’t, but you keep talking about yours day in and day out,” Tom said. “You know, I had my suspicions, so I started to think about everything you mentioned about your ex and what you mentioned about Dan; it was oddly similar. So I had a little conversation with him at that Halloween party-”

“I asked you if Dan had upset you and you said no. I could have reported him to Charles for that,” Phil interrupted.

“Why would I do that? We exchanged information. He said some very interesting things.”

“Tom, Dan wants nothing but to ruin my life. He was just messing with you.”

“So you never went back to him after we met?” Tom waited but when Phil didn’t respond so he continued. “You never begged him to take you back, telling him that I was your second choice, that you would have never chosen me if he’d paid more attention to you? You never kissed him and bit him and got on your knees telling him that I wasn’t as good as him?”

Phil shook his head but lowered his eyes, focusing on the pattern on the rug under his feet.

“No?” Tom pressed. “You never did all those things?”

Phil clenched his jaw as he tried not to let the tears welling in his eyes fall.

Tom didn’t raise his voice but Phil could feel the hurt and anger coming out of him in waves. “So you didn’t lie to me about that? You never treated me like a second-class whore that you could use for your entertainment when you didn’t get what you wanted?”

Phil’s chin quivered but he didn’t reply.

Tom huffed and started pacing around the room. After a few moments, he froze on the spot and turned to Phil. “Did you ever cheat on me?”

“No! No, I swear!” Phil pleaded, the tears finally rolling down his cheeks.

“But you did fuck me while you were with him.” Tom spat. “You made me your side bitch, knowing full well that I had just had my heart broken by an asshole who had cheated on me.”

“I thought he had c-cheated too,” Phil sniffled. “I got pictures of him with someone else when we were talking at the pub.”

Tom searched in his eyes and whatever he found there was enough for him to believe him. He nodded. “Do you still love him?”

“What?” Phil could tell his entire body was shaking; he’d spent so much time trying to repress his feelings that picking apart at his every memory with Dan was too painful. He choked on a sob. It felt like going through it all over again.

“Do you still love the guy you speak about every day, the one whose attention you seek constantly, the one you stalk on Instagram, the one you never report to human resources no matter what he does to you?”

Phil froze, every single muscle on his body tensing in such a way that it was painful. He didn’t know the answer to that, and he didn’t want to know; didn’t want to think about it. He knew that the break up had affected him tremendously, as it had Dan and that it was something he had to focus enough to avoid thinking about, but everything was so complicated -

“Phil!” Tom looked at him with a strange look upon his face. “Phil,” he whispered. “Tell me the truth. Do you still love him?”

“I - I don’t know,” Phil said, his emotions finally catching up to him. He covered his face with his hands and slid down the wall until he was fully sitting on the floor, tears rolling down his cheeks.

Tom crouched in front of him and pulled Phil’s hands away gently and brought them to his lips, pressing a kiss on his knuckles. “I know I’m going to probably regret asking this, but I can’t keep living a lie.” He took a deep breath and just said it. “Do you love me?”

Phil looked at Tom helplessly as sobs wracked through his body. A small whine escaped his throat. “I do, I do love you.” He held onto Tom’s hands tightly as he continued to cry.

“But you’re not in love with me, are you?” Tom’s voice barely above a whisper, his eyes welling with tears.

Phil cried harder, burying his face in his knees. Tom was right, he wasn’t in love with him. “I’m s-sorry. So sorry, Tom.”

The omega ran his fingers through Phil’s hair and shushed him. “It’s ok. I’m used to it. I’m never anyone’s first choice.”

Phil shook his head no. It really hadn’t been like that. “I bought a ring for you,” he sniffled.

“And you would have married me, but we would’ve ended up hating each other because you never belonged to me; not like I belong to you at least. You’re someone else’s, and I can’t go on with that knowledge.”

They got off the floor and hugged for a long time until they had both calmed down. Then they kissed and kissed and kissed. They had often used physical affection to say everything they didn’t know how to put in words, and this - this felt final.

Phil fell asleep in Tom’s arms but woke up alone. A few days later, every trace of Tom ever living with him had vanished.

Phil kept bursting into tears, not knowing what to do with himself, hating the kind of person he had become but unable to find a way to fix his mistakes. After thinking about it for much longer than he should have, he grabbed his phone and tried to call Dan, hoping that he could catch him alone, to ask him if he really was a horrible person and how to be better but he found that he was blocked. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise since Dan had blocked him when… but he had changed his phone number twice since then. Dan had not exchanged any sort of messages with him, yet he had made sure to keep him blocked even now.

It was only noon, but Phil was done with today. He climbed back into bed and pulled the blankets up to his face.

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