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jcmarchi · 7 months ago

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Revolutionizing problem-solving with AI and gaming integration

New Post has been published on https://thedigitalinsider.com/revolutionizing-problem-solving-with-ai-and-gaming-integration/

Revolutionizing problem-solving with AI and gaming integration

In today’s day and time, which is defined by rapid technological advancements, the fusion of artificial intelligence (AI) and gaming presents a globally innovative opportunity to tackle some of the world’s most pressing issues.

Traditionally viewed as two separate, distinct domains, AI and gaming together have the potential to revolutionize the way we approach work, life, and complex global challenges.

This combination builds a superpower technology that can connect AI’s analytical prowess and gaming’s engaging, educational frameworks to create innovative solutions for real-world problems such as forest fires, poverty, and homelessness.

The merging of AI and gaming offers an innovative and revolutionary approach to problem-solving that goes beyond conventional methods in current existence. AI offers some unequaled analytical power and predictive capabilities, enabling precise and efficient strategies for addressing complex issues.

Concurrently, gaming provides immersive and interactive environments that can train, educate, and engage individuals in meaningful ways. When these technologies are integrated, they open up new possibilities into opportunities for developing effective and creative solutions to the world’s most daunting challenges.

Turning possibilities into opportunities

Taking a look at Plato’s Allegory of the Cave, where insight is achieved by seeing beyond the shadows to understand true reality, we can turn possibilities into opportunities by exceeding traditional problem-solving paradigms with the combination of AI and gaming.

By integrating AI and gaming, we can uncover innovative and effective strategies to address really complex global issues. This combination of AI and gaming together is not just a real gamechanger, but it also broadens our perspectives and equips us with innovative tools to combat real-world, everyday challenges like forest fires, poverty, and homelessness, ultimately shining a light on paths to a brighter and more sustainable future.

Like Plato’s Allegory of a Cave, it is the things we don’t see. Many times, we do not see opportunities because they seem so small, but it is the things that seem like the smallest changes that can create the biggest impact.

For example, a one-degree increase in temperature in a specific region, county, or state can lead to significant local impacts. This seemingly small change can result in more frequent and intense heatwaves, affecting public health, particularly among vulnerable populations.

It can disrupt agriculture by altering crop growth cycles and reducing yields, leading to economic losses for farmers. These are two of the many side effects of such a small shift in temperature for a region.

In summation, we can certainly use AI and gaming as a way to garner insight into how our actions affect things like the weather. Gaming for AI can profoundly impact human existence and the natural world in both small and large ways, leading to a healthier, more sustainable, and efficient world, benefiting both humans and nature.

You’re not just another Joe Schmo

What if you could be the person who solves a food crisis with a great idea? In this case, you’re not just another Joe Schmo; you are someone who has made an expansive difference.

The key is access both for great ideas and for the ideas to be actualized. Currently, everyday citizens primarily engage with societal economics and decision-making processes as voters and lobbyists, often in peripheral capacities.

This marginal involvement poses significant challenges for individuals who wish to be heard and actively participate in shaping their communities. The complexity and opacity of the decision-making mechanisms that impact their daily lives—both in the short and long term—further exacerbate these challenges.

Everyday citizens are frequently far removed from the intricate workings of policy-making and economic planning, leading to a disconnect between public needs and decision-makers’ actions.

This gap hinders the ability of communities to leverage the valuable insights and contributions that citizens can offer. However, the integration of Artificial Intelligence (AI) and gaming presents a promising solution to bridge this gap. AI can process and analyze vast amounts of data, providing citizens with accessible information and actionable insights.

Simultaneously, gaming can engage individuals in interactive and immersive experiences, making complex concepts more understandable and decision-making processes more transparent. Together, AI and gaming can create platforms that empower citizens to participate more effectively in their communities.

These technologies can facilitate better understanding, communication, and collaboration, enabling citizens to contribute meaningfully to the decisions that shape their lives. In this way, AI and gaming can transform the role of citizens from passive observers to active participants in the governance and development of their communities.

Additionally, these technologies provide a sort of ‘checks and balances’ to existing and ongoing corruption within political and economic decision-making. AI’s data analysis capabilities can uncover patterns of corruption and inefficiencies, while gaming can foster greater transparency and accountability by involving citizens directly in oversight and decision-making processes.

This dual approach enhances citizen engagement and promotes integrity and trust within the systems that govern their communities.

Sim City, Glacia, United States, 09990

What if you could live in the perfect city? No crime, no poverty, no pollution or disease, and many of the things that plague humans today. Yes this is a utopia, and while currently not possible, we can certainly aim to get to this place.

I call it Sim City, Glacia, United States, 09990. Welcome to a place where your most vivid life simulations transform into reality. Here, water flows abundantly, ensuring a lush and vibrant environment. Everything around you is a striking shade of green, the zip code perfectly matching the hex code 09990, creating a harmonious and visually stunning landscape.

In Sim City, every detail is meticulously crafted to offer an unparalleled experience, making it the ultimate destination for those seeking a blend of nature and technology in perfect balance.

One great example of a video game that could, in concept, integrate well with AI is the video game “Sim City.” Traditionally, Sim City has been a platform where players manage and build cities, dealing with various challenges such as crime, pollution, and traffic. By leveraging AI within Sim City, we can transform it into a powerful tool for real-world problem-solving. Here are some of the opportunities I see available by using Sim City as an existing concept:

1. Citizen engagement and idea generation:

Sim City can serve as a simulation platform where everyday citizens experiment with urban planning and policy decisions in a risk-free environment. With AI analyzing these simulations, we can gather valuable data on what strategies work best for addressing issues like crime, poverty, and homelessness.

Players’ innovative solutions can be evaluated and refined using AI algorithms, creating a repository of effective strategies that urban planners and policymakers can consider.

Additionally, we can track ownership of such ideas by incorporating other solutions such as NFTs and blockchain. For example, the ownership of such innovative platforms can be commercialized, with profits traced and returned to individual citizens.

This model can inspire economic prosperity by ensuring that the financial benefits derived from these technologies are shared among the community members who use and contribute to them. By distributing profits back to citizens, we can create a more inclusive and equitable economic system, further motivating public involvement and investment in community development initiatives.

2. Environmental management and disaster preparedness:

Sim City can integrate AI-driven models for environmental management and disaster preparedness. For example, players can simulate the impact of various policies on forest fires, pollution levels, and climate change.

AI can provide real-time feedback on the potential outcomes of different strategies, helping players understand the long-term effects of their decisions. This approach can create a ‘Butterfly Effect’ scenario, allowing players to emotionally connect with virtual citizens and see how potential outcomes might reflect real-life consequences.

This gamified experience can educate citizens on the importance of sustainable practices and disaster preparedness, fostering a more informed and proactive society.

3. Traffic and urban infrastructure:

Traffic congestion and inefficient urban infrastructure are significant challenges in many cities. Players can experiment with different urban designs and traffic management strategies by incorporating AI into Sim City. AI can analyze the effectiveness of these strategies, providing insights into optimizing traffic flow and reducing congestion.

This data can be invaluable for urban planners looking to implement smart city solutions.

4. Social issues and community building:

Sim City can also address social issues such as poverty and homelessness. Players can test various social policies, such as affordable housing projects, job creation programs, and community support initiatives.

AI can evaluate the impact of these policies on the virtual city’s population, highlighting successful approaches that can be applied in the real world. This interactive and educational experience can raise awareness and drive public support for effective social policies.

This is not a game, this is real life

I recently had to move from one condo to another in San Diego because my landlord was ending their contract with my building. While packing, I had to dispose of my perishable foods as I was about to travel internationally for a few weeks. Naturally, I didn’t want to waste the food.

The timing was incredibly inconvenient. I was notified about the move just 36 hours before my flight from Los Angeles International, leaving me with a very tight schedule. I hoped to find people in need to give the food to, but ironically, despite having so much to give, I couldn’t find anyone to take it during my drive from San Diego to Los Angeles.

Regrettably, I ended up throwing it away because I didn’t have the time to search for people in need without risking missing my flight. Many U.S. cities are exploring AI automation and predictive technologies to locate and assist those who are destitute and economically disadvantaged. However, I don’t see these efforts being democratized to address the issue effectively. The core problem is access—connecting disadvantaged individuals back to mainstream society.

A food revolution for poverty

The dilemma of having to dispose of perishable foods before an international trip due to a last-minute move is a common issue, reflecting broader challenges in resource redistribution.

However, combining AI and gaming can offer innovative solutions to this problem, akin to a real-world SimCity. Imagine a simulation-based resource allocation platform that uses AI to predict, simulate, and optimize the flow of surplus resources in urban environments.

This platform would track and forecast when and where surplus food will become available by integrating data from grocery stores, restaurants, and households. It would identify areas with the highest need for resources through socioeconomic data and real-time inputs from local organizations.

AI could match surplus food providers with recipients in need, optimizing routes to ensure timely delivery and reducing waste. Gamification elements would engage users in managing and improving the virtual city’s resource allocation, offering challenges to allocate resources and build community involvement efficiently.

Users could log surplus food or request assistance via a mobile app, receiving push notifications about nearby opportunities to donate or collect resources. Collaborating with food banks, shelters, and community organizations would enhance the platform’s effectiveness by providing real-time data and aiding in distribution.

In practical terms, when faced with surplus food, you could log it into the platform, and the AI would instantly match it with individuals or organizations along your route who need food.

The platform would provide optimized routes for dropping off the food without significantly detouring from your travel path, allowing you to donate efficiently without risking missing your flight.

Real-time feedback on the impact of your donation would also be provided, possibly through in-game representations of the positive effects on the community. By integrating AI and gamification elements inspired by SimCity, we can create a dynamic platform that efficiently redistributes resources, reduces waste, and connects surplus with need, transforming resource management into a collaborative and rewarding effort.

Conclusion: A new era of innovative problem-solving

The fusion of AI and gaming promises to transform our approach to solving some of the world’s most pressing challenges. By leveraging AI’s unparalleled analytical capabilities and gaming’s immersive, engaging frameworks, we can develop innovative and effective strategies for addressing complex issues like forest fires, poverty, and homelessness.

This powerful combination broadens our perspectives and equips us with the tools needed to create a healthier, more sustainable, and efficient world.

Integrating AI and gaming can revolutionize citizen engagement in societal economics and decision-making processes. Platforms like Sim City, enhanced with AI, can empower everyday citizens to experiment with urban planning and policy decisions in a risk-free environment.

These simulations can generate valuable data and innovative solutions that urban planners and policymakers can consider, ultimately fostering a more inclusive and equitable economic system.

Moreover, AI and gaming’s potential applications extend to environmental management, disaster preparedness, traffic optimization, and addressing social issues.

Gamified experiences can educate and engage the public, raising awareness and driving support for sustainable practices and effective social policies. AI and gaming can enhance transparency, accountability, and trust within governance systems by transforming passive observers into active participants.

In practical scenarios, such as the challenge of redistributing surplus food, AI and gaming can offer real-world solutions that optimize resource allocation and reduce waste. By creating platforms that match surplus food providers with recipients in need, we can ensure timely delivery and efficient resource management. Gamification elements can further engage users, making the process collaborative and rewarding.

In conclusion, we make a better world for all. The integration of AI and gaming is not just a game changer but a revolutionary approach to problem-solving that holds the potential to transform our world. By harnessing these technologies, we can uncover innovative strategies, foster citizen participation, and create a brighter, more sustainable future for all.

Want more from Paul? Read his articles below:

Paul Anthony Claxton – AI Accelerator Institute

Paul Anthony Claxton is a Managing General Partner at Q1 Velocity Venture Capital. He has 10 years of experience as a serial entrepreneur and fund manager, and has co-founded several ventures.

How to get a hold of Paul

www.paulclaxton.io

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hugewoman · 5 months ago

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@marmorada this wasn’t a conversation about “leftist activism” it was very specifically one about feminist philosophy, and something that also kneecaps that is derailment from outside observers who feel the need to step in to infantilize the participants by attempting to mediate the dialogue as if it were a playground brawl rather than a discussion amongst adult intellectual equals

Femsolid is 100% correct in that no one fucking does this to men, decides to try and play the “you’re hurting us all” nonsense to shut down meaningful discourse about… yet so often feminist discussion is interrupted and talked over by people trying to stop us from having a meaningful meeting of minds

Anyways, I was going to jump onto this thread to agree with femsolid in that I think while separatism may be a sliding scale it’s one that you’re supposed to work your way up as far as you comfortably can. I can’t see a way that being het-partnered doesn’t sort of cut that off at the ankles.

The shallowest end of avoiding consumption of male content/media and instead seeking out female creators is a good start but is ultimately almost akin to choice feminism. Choosing how invested we personally want to be in the pop culture around us that is predominantly created and dominated by males isn’t much of a choice. Engaging with female made books/music/film can be fulfilling, but can feel similar to the superficial “empowerment” rather than liberation that liberalism often touts as being the all important conclusion of feminist action.

The personal is the political, and I feel like we can all agree that certain actions taken can be more radical than others. The things we do with and to our body are naturally going to be more meaningful than the music we listen to or the movies we watch or even the hobbies we keep (although I do appreciate hadesoftheladies point about female gatherings being a critical element of feminist engagement). Abolition of things like makeup and shaving and bras and long hair are highly impactful and enormously liberating. Further still, actual physical separation from men is the greatest tool in our arsenal.

I can understand how for heterosexual women this can seem unfair and like a demand from lesbians to remain celibate or unfulfilled. I ask you to instead consider the ways that it might be framed as an investment in your own long term safety and well-being. The greatest danger to women is men, and the men that women are most at risk from is statistically their spouse or life partner. Everything we know about the data of straight marriage firmly suggests that it is one of the greatest risks to her life and happiness that a woman can take on outside of walking through a bad neighborhood at night.

While I generally agree with femsolid’s take on separatism outside of the bedroom being essentially for show, hadesoftheladies said something early on in the thread that resonated with me:

“separatism is uncomfortable and frightening because it challenges the fundamental structure of society. It attacks what is most dear to patriarchy and the economy: the nuclear home + male access to women”

And I think it illustrates how I think the two of you are sort of talking about different situations. If you’re single, I think avoiding men altogether is a phenomenal idea. But the married woman who starts learning about feminism later in life and who wants to take feminist action is going to feel alienated by the idea of separatism bc she’s usually in it for the long haul. She’s not going to leave her husband for the sake of female separatism, but she might start trying to make more female friends and doing things apart from her husband, and that’s going to have a very meaningful impact on her individual life and happiness, and maybe even the other women in her life as well.

I think we really need to remember those women when we think about degrees of feminist action. What seems like small beans for young single politically minded women may be hugely radical for the woman who never thought about feminism in her life before now.

At the same time though, I think straight women who complain about celibacy in regards to separatism need to have an honest reminder about the facts and realities of dating/hookup culture and how dangerous and unsatisfying it is for women in general. Coming from a lesbian who has had bad sex with men and deeply regrets it, I’m sure being told to avoid sexual contact with men seems like the start of a bad joke. But lack of orgasm and risk of assault are very real threats to the women who engage with men, and seem like they should be stronger arguments than they currently are. Straight women who say they won’t become celibate often say they deserve pleasure and fulfillment, but realistically what consistent and reliable pleasure do men offer that can’t be taken care of yourself?

Edit/update: I saw two additional reblog from you guys after making my long comment gah! I’d like to add that I think fems metaphor of veganism is a good analogy, and that it’s absurd to call yourself vegan if you’re going around eating pork, ie to say you’re a separatist while being married to a man or raising sons is incongruous. That being said I think it’s another thing altogether to take what possible baby steps you can towards separatism, that it’s less like falsely calling yourself vegan and more like just saying you’re cutting back on meat lol.

Also hadesoftheladies I hope this doesn’t come across as patronizing or pandering but I thought it was really big of you to admit your original post was de-radicalizing and I’m honestly impressed

btw separatism is mutli-modal and you can still be het-partnered and practice separatism. as much as i believe the most effective kind of separatism is not partnering with men, i don't think that excludes women from other forms of separatism bc it doesn't.

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vkelleyart · 4 years ago

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Thoughts on fandom: inclusion and engagement.

(Art credit to the kindhearted @penpanoply!)

There’s been some stuff floating around on Tumblr about strife in the CO/WS fandom, and though I haven’t been explicitly named-dropped on anything public, my DMs have been... active. lol Rather than rehash what’s been said already, I just want to impart a little wisdom and perspective in the hopes it may soothe frayed feelings and offer a way ahead for cultivating a respectful community. As someone who has been an active participant in online fandoms since the mid-’90s, which was the advent of online fandom content creation (shout out to my fellow X-Philes!), and who has also spent a chunk of her professional life managing social media for the federal government and for activist groups, I can promise you it’s all gonna be okay.

Here’s some context for why strife happens and what we can do to create a more inclusive and communicative fandom environment.

1) It sounds cliché, but fandoms go through growing pains.

In the case of the Simon Snow fandom, what was once a small and cozy space untouched by cataclysmic events (such as the release of *gasp* a sequel) has grown exponentially in a relatively short amount of time following the release of Wayward Son. Newcomers are eager to find a home in this space at the same time as folks who’ve been here a while may be consciously or unconsciously wary about widening their circle, and It’s important to remember that this is not necessarily an expression of bad behavior on either side but just human psychology doing its thing.

The byproduct, however, is that tension and stress builds over time from the lack of meaningful communication across the divide, which subsequently fuels misunderstandings. Ironically, the interfaces we use to communicate don’t help with this because any existing communication about the tension happens in tiny vacuums until a trigger goes off and bad feelings go public.

Way Ahead: These moments of destabilization are opportunities to see where we can be more self aware about how we engage with fandom and the kind of community we want to be. Can you promote, support, or befriend someone trying to gain a foothold? If yes, please do! Each person must reach their own decision about what they can do within the confines of their available energy, health, and time, but a little self awareness goes a long way as long as you’re honest with yourself and others if applicable about what you can contribute. Anyone who judges you for it isn’t worth the strife.

2) In a fandom comprised of vulnerable/marginalized people, it’s more accurate to say that cliques are “bubbles of trust.”

This one's important. Just by nature of the source material, the CO/WS fandom includes fans with a wide array of backgrounds and experiences, especially when it comes to those who identify with the characters’ queerness, mental illness, and/or trauma. I really believe––based on individual conversations/group chats––that the difficult lived experiences that so many of our fandom peers have endured has produced one of the most open, aware, and accepting fandoms I’ve had the pleasure of participating in. Our vulnerability is, in a real way, our strength.

That said, a community of survivors also has the side effect of cultivating small circles of engagement that I call “bubbles of trust.” When you’re a survivor of abuse, marginalization, mental illness, fill-in-the-blank, it’s often quite hard to risk casting a wide net and expanding your circle to include new faces––which can subsequently be internalized by equally sensitive and vulnerable newcomers as rejection, judgement, or inadequacy.

Way Ahead: First of all, there may indeed be gatekeeping and exclusion going on. But before internalizing someone’s cagey behavior as gatekeeping or purposely exclusionary, ask yourself if you have all the information. Many people are private (I include myself in this assessment) because life has regrettably taught them to be this way, and so they may insulate themselves to a small group of people who have earned their trust. Some people might also triggered by certain content (case in point: smut triggers my anxiety) so they don’t engage with it. Others might have something in their pasts that define how they handle certain subjects (for example, a person of color should not be tone policed for getting angry when confronted with a racialized microagression, however accidental it was). You just don’t know what you don’t know.

The solution here is to regularly check your privilege and ask questions in a private space if you sense you’re being treated unfairly by someone. If you go public with your grievances in hopes of mobilizing the mob, you may accidentally find yourself stepping into the role of the aggressor instead of the victim.

3) Social Media is not built to help you get engagement. It’s built to help itself make money off of you.

Repeat after me: Hits/likes are not a measurable indicator of talent or worth. There are ridiculously talented folks on Tumblr and elsewhere who, for whatever reason, haven’t had their viral moment, and it’s not their fault. Loads of factors come into play where things like likes, reblogs, and comments are concerned, among them being posting frequency, subject matter, the time of day, the day of the week, the week of the month, the month of the year, the current administration, the stock exchange, the concentration of middle class users, who just won the Superbowl, a madman trying to steal an election and undermine the democratic process, a PANDEMIC, do you get where I’m going with this?? lol

At the end of the day, my humble successes have been helped along by good luck, good timing, high profile signal boosters, and an absurd amount of work. (This is why I try to signal boost new work whenever I get a chance over at @vkelleyshares.)

So while you cannot control Tumblr’s interface, trends at large, or your fellow users, here’s what you can do to ensure you give your work the best possible chance of exposure.

Have an image ready to go with your post. Tumblr is a visual platform (no matter what it says about being good for text). Not good with images? Set up a Canva.com account and get access to free graphic software with a gazillion templates to create whatever attractive image you want to attach to your post.

Keep the outward facing text brief and easy on the eyes. Too long and eyes will glaze over. Put excess text behind a “read more.”

You may think you’re being cute when you do this, but don’t put yourself down in your posts. (Don’t put yourself down in general, of course.) Doing so acts as engagement repellant. If you don’t believe in your work, no one else will.

Related: Be your best cheerleader. Confidence is a magnet, and if you don’t have it, go ahead and fake it until you start to convince yourself you are worth the buzz. So promote yourself! You have gifts that only you can impart. Use that knowledge to fuel everything you do from your art/fiction writing to your outreach with other content creators, and by golly, if someone’s done it already, acknowledge that contribution and then tell the world that this is YOUR unique take on it.

Treat your fellow fandom creators as human beings, not art/fiction/content boosting machines. I cannot count how many times I’ve had folks slide into my DMs with offers of friendship only to disappear once they realize I’m not available to draw a picture for their fic. It hurts because it’s manipulative and it makes me want to hole up and not signal boost anyone. Creators who truly support each other will not give off a transactional vibe. I want to help you reach more people, but not if that’s all I’m good for in your eyes.

The long and short of it: Lead with compassion, do your best with the opportunities at your disposal, and remember that fandom belongs to everyone in it. ❤️

What saves a fandom made of sensitive and vulnerable souls from imploding when it goes through growing pains is radical compassion from those who can offer it. Begin with the assumption that your fellow fandomers are not trying to harm you, and wade into the water knowing that your insight into the lives of your peers is limited by default and you may need to temper your words or actions accordingly. If you’re a content creator, save compassion for yourself as well, as there are indeed challenges to gaining an audience, and lack of engagement does not mean you lack talent or skill. Be your best advocate, and if you have the bandwidth to lift up a fellow creator and make a new friend, please, go ahead do it!

And finally, fandom belongs to everyone, and no one has a monopoly on characters, tropes, or themes. Create and consume what you love (with respect for your more vulnerable peers), and bask in the variety, my friends!

That’s all I’ve got in my head at the moment, although I’m sure there’s more I’m forgetting. Thanks so much to @penpanoply for letting me use her art for this and to everyone else, hang in there and try not to judge each other too harshly. These are unprecedented times, and most of us are doing our best in circumstances that are pushing us to our limits.

As always, if you have questions or want to sound off on anything, shoot me a message or an ask, or ping me on Discord. It might take me a second to respond (thanks, Covid) but I’ll get to it! Love, love, and more love to all.

#fandom stuff

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cotton-candy-in-a-thong · 3 years ago

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Noncon stories, Fantasy vs. Reality, and more. fucking. issues.

Recently, I’ve been hit with some drama as to why I’m a “bad person” by various, anonymous users in this fandom. I thought I’d try to address the claim, address my stance on fics that involve noncon, and what I think about the “Tumblr mentality” after everything I’ve seen of this place. I should also note that I’m going to use the specific words and phrases I’ve been forced to constantly repeat as explaining my stance has been very difficult for me, as I’m a person who’s apparently challenging to understand.

This is going to be a long post, with subjects that's obviously going to trigger people so here's a warning right now..

That being said, I’m going to dive into this with some shit I’ve definitely said before:

“Consensual Noncon” Kink

The Appeal of this Theme in Fanfiction:

I don't think calling fics that involve noncon "rape fics" and those who enjoy it "getting off to rape" is a very good way to put it. Many engaging and well done media pieces often involve some very dark themes. Again, Monster by Meg and Dia is a song that features the main character sexually abusing a girl he met. You COULD call this a "rape song", but acting as if the rape is the only thing that matters in this story would be pretty..naive. The story has to do with an emotionally, and physically neglected/abused boy, who grows up and becomes an attention/love starved monster who's SO starving for validation, that he believes forcing himself upon a girl he knew would "prove" to himself that he's capable of being touched and loved. Of course, the main character eventually realizes that rape is not love, that what he did was wrong, and later kills himself in his own bathtub with kerosene and a match.

However, the assault aspect of this song is still a meaningful and alluring part because it talks about how emotional and physical abuse can warp someone's perspective on reality, to the point where they think forcing someone to "stay" with them is how to create a healthy relationship. That's the same energy I have for noncon fics, especially in the slasher fandom. Many slasher fics that contain noncon often have to do with the slasher preying on the reader because of their own fucked up mind. It's intriguing because, let's be honest, pretty much none of the slashers are in a pretty good mental space lmao. Thus, noncon actually falls more in line with how slashers would go about what they believe is a "good relationship" more often than quite a bit of fans here seem to believe. Again, Michael got boners, Jason chained someone up, Fredddy smooches people against their will, Billy Lenz is a sex offender, Chromeskull makes snuff, yada yada yada, you know the drill. That being said, it's interesting to see noncon being expressed with these characters because it gives us a new perspective on how fucked up they'd likely be if the world of sex and relationships was introduced to these characters.

Now why would some people become sexually aroused by the events of the story? First of all, how does “Consensual Noncon” kink work?

u/Jumbledcode. (2015). ‘Can anyone comment on why people (someone like me) enjoy rape/non-con story lines?’. r/TwoXChromosomes.

“I'd suggest that there are several factors that make up the appeal of non-con fantasies.

Guilt/Self-image: For many people, their sexual/relationship desires don't necessarily match their image of themselves, or alternatively they feel guilt over others' perceptions of those desires. Rape fantasies allow them to mantain some illusion of denial over their desires while still indulging in the idea of them.

Responsibility/Laziness: The appeal of abdicating control isn't limited to avoiding guilt; it's very tempting to want a scenario where you have no responsibility for maintaining your lifestyle/happiness. Similarly to before, it's the appeal of being given what you secretly want without even having to choose it.

Transgressiveness: A rape scenario has overtones of danger and taboo-breaking. These can easily be exciting and can therefore be a turn-on.

Desire: Being wanted is often a huge turn-on, and the idea of someone desiring you enough to break laws and disregard everything to have you plays into this feeling.

To me, it seems that most people who fantasize about being the subject of rape do so due to some mix of these motivations I've mentioned. Of course, there are also those who have experiences which have taught them to associate non-consent with their sexuality, but that's a separate issue”.

What if the Fanfic Only Involves the Act though? Wouldn’t it Encourage Actual Rape?

Let’s differentiate fantasy and reality. Towards those with the noncon kink: it offers arousal because of the ideas listed above (the idea of the reader not having to make any moves and the character doing the “intimate work” FOR them, the excitement of such a taboo sexual encounter, and the feeling to be desired through an altered, brutish encounter). Rape is the use of sex to remove control over the victim’s mind and body. The readers DO have control over whether or not they get to “encounter” (the choice to even read) this fantasy, so right away consent is present in reality, and no actual rape is being done.

Now does this mean that the kinkers are getting off on the idea of rape? Not really.

The thing with self-inserts is that it allows you to be connected to the story. That way, even if the story has you bruised up and begging for mercy, a part of you-you (if you’re a kinker) wants to keep reading it as you find it exciting. That way, as you and story-you are connected, what you really want in such a fantasy is for it to keep going despite the brutish, possessive, however yet desired nature of the character you’re dreaming about dealing with. (repeat: the idea of the reader not having to make any moves and the character doing the “intimate work” FOR them, the excitement of such a taboo sexual encounter, and the feeling to be desired through an altered, brutish encounter). That being said, it’s still entirely possible for kinkers to have their personal space and wishes crossed, and ultimately assaulted. Us enjoying the fantasy of such a reverie sexual encounter does not spell out to real life because (in reality) we’re not horny all the time, we would still like our bodies to be respected when we find it necessary, and we still have feelings as we’re still human.

“Fantasy (including video games) leads to violence” fallacy.

It would be like assuming that shooters in games like GTA fantacise about murder, encourage it, and would do it in real life. Taking fabricated anger out on virtual bodies or NPCs is quite different from the weight of murder (the killing of another human being). One can play video games with lots of violence towards such fabricated characters, while discouraging violence towards human beings. The act of using a game controller to beat up Donkey Kong in Smash, to shoot Nazi zombies in a Black Ops game, or to kill a Geisha in Little Nightmares is incredibly, and immensely different from completely eradicating the life of a person on Earth, and to assume that everyone who plays violent video games would spill out to violence in reality would be to participate in a ridiculous fallacy. Yes, there are outliers who are feeble minded enough to let their fantasies influence their actions towards actual people, but I must repeat that there are also people who utilize these fantasies for their personal satisfaction, while understanding the weight of the real world around them (and choosing not to act so detrimentally). Therefore, it wouldn’t be fair as it would be unnecessary to blatantly say that all fantasies are horrible and should be entirely eradicated if there ARE many people who ARE aware enough to understand that some thoughts are better off staying in fiction.

Now is the time to address what’s been said:

...Firstly, I think it’s very disgusting that random users, on Tumblr of all places, are trying to manipuate random victims of sexual assault into hating something or someone just because these users FEEL like “it’s the right thing to do”.. People, victims of sexual assault aren’t your fucking dogs. They’re not carriage horses, they’re not your work mules, they’re not your guns and swords...they’re just people who normally wanna be left the fuck alone like everyone else. Plus, there ARE people who have experienced sexual assault who take joy in reading such dark storylines. What would these users have to say to them? That they’re not “real” victims? That what they’ve experienced “never happened”? That they’re “just like” their own perpetrators for using the consensual nonconsent to miraculously help them overcome their trauma? Should they really abandon their coping mechanism just because there are other victims who cope in different ways?

..If you seriously believe that all people who have gone through a traumatic event are gonna cope in the exact same fucking way, you literally don’t even know enough about PTSD to even be making a bold statement about cope.

This is the part where I finally realized that people, and especially those on Tumblr, don’t actually care about rape victims as much as they may claim. Many users on here, on this platform and in this fandom, don’t truly give a flying monkey shit about rape victims as people, nor what they have to say about the subject. Rape victims..on this place..seem to be used mainly as a means of figurative weaponry for a group’s subjective morality.

I find the similarity close to radical feminism. Radical feminists often believe that women, from near and far, have to do everything in their power to “destroy” the patriarchy. This would mean disobeying the societal expectation of women, even if there are some women who take joyment in engaging in some societal standards for their personal liking. An example would be sex work. Radical feminists acknowledge the flaws in performing sex work, but believe that NO woman should EVER partake even if the woman wants to do it out of her own free will. In demonizing and ostracizing any woman who doesn’t fall into the radical feminist agenda, radical feminists actually contradict their purpose to “let women be free”. At this point, you realize that radical feminists often don’t actually give a fuck about what any woman wants for herself. Instead, radical feminists want to utilize any woman they can find just to flip off men as a group.

In Tumblr users trying to “stand up” for rape victims for their personal “holier-than-thou” ego, they fail to care enough about the very people they defend to understand the dynamics of some of their coping mechanisms, thus begin to bully some members of the group they claim to protect because of the very narcissism, misunderstanding, and controlling nature going on behind their own “activism”. So now that some users have found something to hate, in this case being noncon stories, they attempt to manipulate victims of rape into ostraciszing and demonizing fantasies and other victims of rape just because the “activists” themsleves don’t like it. Even trying to argue that rape victims have a “duty” to agree with everything these “activists” try to do for them.

Sounds awfully familiar to the attitude democrats have towards any minority when it’s time to vote. “I care about you...but you have to agree with everything I say and believe because I want what I think is best for you. If you disagree with me, you’re ungrateful and a traitor”.

Now...a little about myself.

I’m not sure of everyone else who’s into the noncon type of story, but I use it to get away from my past. In noncon stories, I want to read what happens in the chapters. I want to imagine them for morbid curiosity and arousal I feel at the time being. In reality, my attackers didn’t care when I wasn’t in the mood, and never gave me a choice. In noncon stories, I get to choose the character I want to encounter in the fantasy and NOT have it picked FOR me. In real life, I didn’t get to choose who did some things to me. In noncon stories, I get to stop reading them and do something else whenever I’m not feeling it anymore. In reality? My attackers kept going because, in the situation, it was no longer up to me. After noncon stories, my body doesn’t walk away with bruises, bite marks, and physical reminders every time I take my clothes off or try to masturbate. In real life...that shit can mark you, disease you, and then traumatize you. With the stories, I get to delete my search history, join another fandom, and act like nothing ever happened. For reality? Your own body is a reminder of what happened because it was real. In reality, I’m NEVER gonna fucking forget what happened. I’ll be lucky if my own mind and body doesn’t haunt me for at least one day..

So seeing that someone, and probably multiple people not only tried to use victims of sexual assault for their own “go get em” dogs, but to try and phrase me as someone who loves and encourages such an assault on human beings? After the things I felt? After the things I tasted? After pathetically searching for the support of relatives, just to get shut down with “you’re lying”?..

...All the times I've been held down..threatened..clothes getting snagged off..parts being opened and touched after I've fought to just get the fuck away from certain people...

According to this anon..."she likes rape".

...I guess I just fucking LOVED EVERYTHING THEN.

You know...all my life I’ve been misunderstood by many people. It’s honestly really disappointing that even now when I’m better at explaining myself than ever, I’m STILL being phrased as a “psychopath” by random people who haven’t even taken the time to even know me. Not even from a minute-long conversation through a damn computer screen. And you wanna know the funny thing? I’m probably being laughed at as this is being read. Some of these users, these internet stalkers, are probably giggling, smiling, and saying “Haha YES we GOT the bitch!! Cry you piece of shit SLUT!!”. So maybe explaining my past experiences to help everyone understand why some people may use noncon stories to their fantasy advantage is gonna land me messages going: “You haven’t been raped you lying bitch”, “Maybe you should get raped again”, “You definitely enjoyed it”, and the overused, yet strong “Kill yourself”.

So how am I gonna end this message? With me saying that many of you, who THINK you’re doing the right thing by justifying harassment and trying to manipulate others into joining your little crusade to bully people away from the fandom (over extremely mundane fucking things)...aren’t really good people. At best, in this case...you’re fucking stupid. You will never truly speak for any of the marginalized groups you claim to know like the back of your hand. Simply, you will never. be. a hero.

If by chance, by an astrological chance..that any random user wants to come up and apologize out of the blue for talking such shit and for saying such things..I don't even wanna hear it...just get the fuck out of my face..

#slashers #slasher fandom #tw noncon #consensual noncon #fandom drama #long post #past experiences #anon ask

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armageddon-generation · 4 years ago

Text

Articulating Why His Dark Materials is Badly Written

A long essay-thing with lots of specific examples and explanations of why I feel this way. Hopefully I’ve kept fanboy bitching to a minimum.

This isn’t an attack on fans of the show, nor a personal attack on Jack Thorne. I’m not looking to ruin anyone’s enjoyment of the show, I just needed to properly articulate, with examples, why I struggle with it. I read and love the books and that colours my view, but I believe that HDM isn’t just a clumsy, at-best-functional, sometimes incompetent adaptation, it’s a bad TV show separate from its source material. The show is the blandest, least interesting and least engaging version of itself it could be.

His Dark Materials has gorgeous production design and phenomenal visual effects. It's well-acted. The score is great. But my god is it badly written. Jack Thorne writing the entire first season damned the show. There was no-one to balance out his flaws and biases. Thorne is checking off a list of plot-points, so concerned with manoeuvring the audience through the story he forgets to invest us in it. The scripts are mechanical, empty, flat.

Watching HDM feels like an impassioned fan earnestly lecturing you on why the books are so good- (Look! It's got other worlds and religious allegory and this character Lyra is really, really important I swear. Isn't Mrs Coulter crazy? The Gyptians are my favourites.) rather than someone telling the story naturally.

My problems fall into 5 main categories:

Exposition- An unwillingness to meaningfully expand the source material for a visual medium means Thorne tells and doesn't show crucial plot-points. He then repeats the same thing multiple times because he doesn't trust his audience

Pacing- By stretching out the books and not trusting his audience Thorne dedicates entire scenes to one piece of information and repeats himself constantly (see: the Witches' repetition of the prophecy in S2).

Narrative priorities- Thorne prioritises human drama over fantasy. This makes sense budgetarily, but leads to barely-present Daemons, the Gyptians taking up too much screentime, rushed/badly written Witches (superpowers, exposition) and Bears (armourless bear fight), and a Lyra more focused on familial angst than the joy of discovery

Tension and Mystery- because HDM is in such a hurry to set up its endgame it gives you the answers to S1's biggest mysteries immediately- other worlds, Lyra's parents, what happens to the kids etc. This makes the show less engaging and feel like it's playing catch-up to the audience, not the other way around.

Tonal Inconsistency- HDM tries to be a slow-paced, grounded, adult drama, but its blunt, simplistic dialogue and storytelling methods treat the audience like children that need to be lectured.

MYSTERY, SUSPENSE AND INTRIGUE

The show undercuts all the books’ biggest mysteries. Mrs Coulter is set up as a villain before we meet her, other worlds are revealed in 1x2, Lyra's parents by 1x3, what the Magesterium do to kids is spelled out long before Lyra finds Billy (1x2). I understand not wanting to lose new viewers, but neutering every mystery kills momentum and makes the show much less engaging.

This extends to worldbuilding. The text before 1x1 explains both Daemons and Lyra's destiny before we meet her. Instead of encouraging us to engage with the world and ask questions, we're given all the answers up front and told to sit back and let ourselves be spoon-fed. The viewer is never an active participant, never encouraged to theorise or wonder

Intrigue motivated you to engage with Pullman's philosophical themes and concepts. Without it, HDM feels like a lecture, a theme park ride and not a journey.

The only one of S1's mysteries left undiminished is 'what is Dust?', which won't be properly answered until S3, and that answer is super conceptual and therefore hard to make dramatically satisfying

TONAL INCONSISTENCY

HDM billed itself as a HBO-level drama, and was advertised as a GoT inheritor. It takes itself very seriously- the few attempts at humour are stilted and out of place

The production design is deliberately subdued, most notably choosing a mid-twentieth century aesthetic for Lyra’s world over the late-Victorian of the books or steampunk of the movie. The colour grading would be appropriate for a serious adult drama.

Reviewers have said this stops the show feeling as fantastical as it should. It also makes Lyra’s world less distinct from our own.

Most importantly, minimising the wondrous fantasy of S1 neuters its contrast with the escalating thematic darkness of the finale (from 1x5 onwards), and the impact of Roger’s death. Pullman's books are an adult story told through the eyes of a child. Lyra’s innocence and naivety in the first book is the most important journey of the trilogy. Instead, the show starts serious and thematically heavy (we’re told Lyra has world-saving importance before we even meet her) and stays that way.

Contrasting the serious tone, grounded design and poe-faced characters, the dialogue is written to cater to children. It’s horrendously blunt and pulls you out of scenes. Subtext is obliterated at every opportunity. Even in the most recent episode, 2x7, Pan asks Lyra ‘do you think you’re changing because of Will?’

I cannot understate how on the nose this line is, and how much it undercuts the themes of the final book. Instead of even a meaningful shot of Lyra looking at Will, the show treats the audience like complete idiots.

So, HDM looks and advertises itself like an adult drama and is desperate to be taken seriously by wearing its big themes on its sleeve from the start instead of letting them evolve naturally out of subtext like the books, and dedicating lots of scenes to Mrs Coulter's self-abuse

At the same time its dialogue and character writing is comparable to the Star Wars prequels, more childish than media aimed at a similar audience - Harry Potter, Doctor Who, Avatar the Last Airbender etc

DAEMONS

The show gives itself a safety net by explaining Daemons in an opening text-crawl, and so spends less time showing the mechanics of the Daemon-human bond. On the HDM subreddit, I’ve seen multiple people get to 1x5 or 6, and then come to reddit asking basic questions like ‘why do only some people have Daemons?’ or ‘Why are Daemons so important?’.

It’s not that the show didn’t answer these questions; it was in the opening text-crawl. It’s just the show thinks telling you is enough and never shows evidence to back that up. Watching a TV show you remember what you’re shown much easier than what you’re told

The emotional core of Northern Lights is the relationship between Lyra and Pan. The emotional core of HDM S1 is the relationship between Lyra and Mrs Coulter. This wouldn't be bad- it's a fascinating dynamic Ruth plays wonderfully- if it didn't override the Daemons

Daemons are only onscreen when they serve a narrative purpose. Thorne justifies this because the books only describe Daemons when they tell us about their human. On the page your brain fills the Daemons in. This doesn't work on-screen; you cannot suspend your disbelief when their absence is staring you in the face

Thorne clarified the number of Daemons as not just budgetary, but a conscious creative choice to avoid onscreen clutter. This improved in S2 after vocal criticism.

Mrs Coulter/the Golden Monkey and Lee/Hester have well-drawn relationships in S1, but Pan and Lyra hug more in the 2-hour Golden Compass movie than they do in the 8-hour S1 of HDM. There's barely any physical contact with Daemons at all.

They even cut Pan and Lyra's hug after escaping the Cut in Bolvangar. In the book they can't let go of each other. The show skips it completely because Thorne wants to focus on Mrs Coulter and Lyra.

They cut Pan and Lyra testing how far apart they can be. They cut Lyra freeing the Cut Daemons in Bolvangar with the help of Kaisa. We spent extra time with both Roger and Billy Costa, but didn't develop their bonds with their Daemons- the perfect way to make the Cut more impactful

I don't need every single book scene in the show, but notice that all these cut scenes reinforced how important Daemons are. For how plodding the show is. you'd think they could spare time for these moments instead of inventing new conversations that tell us the information they show

Daemons are treated as separate beings and thus come across more like talking pets than part of a character

The show sets the rules of Daemons up poorly. In 1x2, Lyra is terrified by the Monkey being so far from Coulter, but the viewer has nothing to compare it to. We’re retroactively told in that this is unnatural when the show has yet to establish what ‘natural’ is.

The guillotine blueprint in 1x2 (‘Is that a human and his Daemon, Pan? It looks like it.’ / ‘A blade. To cut what?’) is idiotic. It deflates S1’s main mystery and makes the characters look stupid for not figuring out what they aren’t allowed to until they did in the source material, it also interferes with how the audience sees Daemons. In the book, Cutting isn’t revealed until two-thirds of the way in (1x5). By then we’ve spent a lot of time with Daemons, they’ve become a background part of the world, their ‘rules’ have been established, and we’re endeared to them.

By showing the Guillotine and putting Daemons under threat in the second episode, the show never lets us grow attached. This, combined with their selective presence in scenes, draws attention to Daemons as a plot gimmick and not a natural extension of characters. Like Lyra, the show tells us why Daemons are important before we understand them.

Billy Costa's fate falls flat. It's missing the dried fish/ fake Daemon Tony Markos clings to in the book. Thorne said this 'didn't work' on the day, but it worked in the film. Everyone yelling about Billy not having a Daemon is laughable when most of the background extras in the same scene don't have Daemons themselves

WITCHES

The Witches are the most common complaint about the show. Thorne changed Serafina Pekkala in clever, logical ways (her short hair, wrist-knives and cloud pine in the skin)

The problem is how Serafina is written. The Witches are purely exposition machines. We get no impression of their culture, their deep connection to nature, their understanding of the world. We are told it. It is never shown, never incorporated into the dramatic action of the show.

Thorne emphasises Serafina's warrior side, most obviously changing Kaisa from a goose into a gyrfalcon (apparently a goose didn't work on-screen)

Serafina single-handedly slaughtering the Tartars is bad in a few ways. It paints her as bloodthirsty and ruthless. Overpowering the Witches weakens the logic of the world (If they can do that, why do they let the Magesterium bomb them unchallenged in 2x2?). It strips the Witches of their subtlety and ambiguity for the sake of cinematic action.

A side-effect of Serafina not being with her clan at Bolvangar is limiting our exposure to the Witches. Serafina is the only one invested in the main plot, we only hear about them from what she tells us. This poor set-up weakens the Witch subplot in S2

Lyra doesn’t speak to Serafina until 2x6. She laid eyes on her once in S1.

The dialogue in the S2’s Witch subplot is comparable to the Courasant section of The Phantom Menace.

Two named characters, neither with any depth (Serafina and Coram's dead son developed him far more than her). The costumes look ostentatious and hokey- the opposite of what the Witches should be. They do nothing but repeat the same exposition at each other, even in 2x7.

We feel nothing when the Witches are bombed because the show never invests us in what is being destroyed- with the amount of time wasted on long establishing shots, there’s not one when Lee Scoresby is talking to the Council.

BEARS

Like the Witches; Thorne misunderstands and rushes the fantasy elements of the story. The 2007 movie executed both Iofur's character and the Bear Fight much better than the show- bloodless jaw-swipe and all

Iofur's court was not the parody of human court in the books. He didn't have his fake-Daemon (hi, Billy)

An armourless bear fight is like not including Pan in the cutting scene. After equating Iorek's armour to a Daemon (Lee does this- we don’t even learn how important it is from Iorek himself, and the comparison meant less because of how badly the show set up Daemons) the show then cuts the plotpoint that makes the armour plot-relevant. This diminishes all of Bear society. Like Daemons, we're told Iorek's armour is important but it's never shown to be more than a cool accessory

GYPTIANS

Gyptians suffer from Hermoine syndrome. Harry Potter screenwriter Steve Kloves' favourite character was Hermione, and so Film!Hermoine lost most of Book!Hermoine's flaws and gained several of Book!Ron's best moments. The Gyptians are Jack Thorne's favourite group in HDM and so they got the extra screentime and development that the more complicated groups/concepts like Witches, Bears, and Daemons (which, unlike the Gyptians, carry over to other seasons amd are more important to the overall story) needed

At the same time, he changes them from a private people into an Isle of Misfit Toys. TV!Ma Costa promises they'll ‘make a Gyptian woman out of Lyra yet’, but in the book Ma specifically calls Lyra out for pretending to be Gyptian, and reminds her she never can be.

This small moment indicates how, while trying to make the show more grounded and 'adult', Thorne simultaneously made it more saccharine and sentimental. He neuters the tragedy of the Cut kids when Ma Costa says they’ll become Gyptians. Pullman's books feel like an adult story told through the eyes of a child. The TV show feels like a child's story masquerading as a serious drama.

LIN-MANUEL MIRANDA

Let me preface this by saying I genuinely really enjoy the performances in the show. It was shot in the foot by The Golden Compass' perfect casting.

The most contentious/'miscast' actor among readers is LMM. Thorne ditched the books' wise Texan for a budget Han Solo. LMM isn't a great dramatic actor (even in Hamilton he was the weak link performance-wise) but he makes up for it in marketability- lots of people tried the show because of him

Readers dislike that LMM's Lee is a thief and a scoundrel, when book-Lee is so moral he and Hester argue about stealing. Personally, I like the change in concept. Book!Lee's parental love for Lyra just appears. It's sweet, but not tied to a character arc. Done right, Lyra out-hustling Lee at his own game and giving him a noble cause to fight for (thus inspiring the moral compass of the books) is a more compelling arc.

DAFNE KEENE AND LYRA

I thought Dafne would be perfect casting. Her feral energy in Logan seemed a match made in heaven. Then Jack Thorne gave her little to do with it.

Compare how The Golden Compass introduced Lyra, playing Kids and Gobblers with a group of Gyptian kids, including Billy Costa. Lyra and Roger are chased to Jordan by the Gyptians and she makes up a lie about a curse to scare the Gyptians away.

In one scene the movie set up: 1) the Gobblers (the first we hear of them in the show is in retrospect, Roger worrying AFTER Billy is taken) 2) Lyra’s pre-existing relationship with the Gyptians (not in the show), 3) Friendship with Billy Costa (not in the book or show) 4) Lyra’s ability to befriend and lead groups of people, especially kids, and 5) Lyra’s ability to lie impressively

By comparison, it takes until midway through 1x2 for TV!Lyra to tell her first lie, and even then it’s a paper-thin attempt.

The show made Roger Lyra’s only friend. This artificially heightens the impact of Roger's death, but strips Lyra of her leadership qualities and ability to befriend anyone.

Harry Potter fans talk about how Book!Harry is funnier and smarter than Film!Harry. They cut his best lines ('There's no need to call me sir, Professor') and made him blander and more passive. The same happened to Lyra.

Most importantly, Lyra is not allowed to lie for fun. She can't do anything 'naughty' without being scolded. This colours the few times Lyra does lie (e.g. to Mrs Coulter in 1x2) negatively and thus makes Lyra out to be more of a brat than a hero.

This is a problem with telling Northern Lights from an outside, 'adult' perspective- to most adults Lyra is a brat. Because we’re introduced to her from inside her head, we think she's great. It's only when we meet her through Will's eyes in The Subtle Knife and she's filthy, rude and half-starved that we realise Lyra bluffs her way through life and is actually pretty non-functional

Thorne prioritises grounded human drama over fantasy, and so his Lyra has her love of bears and witches swapped for familial angst. (and, in S2. angst over Roger). By exposing Mrs Coulter as her mother early, Thorne distracts TV!Lyra from Book!Lyra’s love of the North. The contrast between wonder and reality made NL's ending a definitive threshold between innocence and knowledge. Thorne showed his hand too early.

Similarly, TV!Lyra doesn’t have anywhere near as strong an admiration for Lord Asriel. She calls him out in 1x8 (‘call yourself a Father’), which Book!Lyra never would because she’s proud to be his child. From her perspective, at this point Asriel is the good parent.

TV!Lyra’s critique of Asriel feels like Thorne using her as a mouthpiece to voice his own, adult perspective on the situation. Because Lyra is already disappointed in Asriel, his betrayal in the finale isn’t as effective. Pullman saves the ‘you’re a terrible Father’ call-out for the 3rd book for a reason; Lyra’s naive hero-worship of Asriel in Northern Lights makes the fall from Innocence into Knowledge that Roger’s death represents more effective.

So, on TV Lyra is tamer, angstier, more introverted, less intelligent, less fun and more serious. We're just constantly told she's important, even before we meet her.

MRS COULTER (AND LORD ASRIEL)

Mrs Coulter is the main character of the show. Not Lyra. Mrs Coulter was cast first, and Lyra was cast based on a chemistry test with Ruth Wilson. Coulter’s character is given lots of extra development, where the show actively strips Lyra of her layers.

To be clear, I have no problem with developing Mrs Coulter. She is a great character Ruth Wilson plays phenomenally. I do have a problem with the show fixating on her at the expense of other characters.

Lyra's feral-ness is given to her parents. Wilson and McAvoy are more passionate than in the books. This is fun to watch, but strips them of subtlety- you never get Book!Coulter's hypnotic allure from Wilson, she's openly nasty, even to random strangers (in 2x3 her dismissal of the woman at the hotel desk felt like a Disney villain).

Compare how The Golden Compass (2007) introduced Mrs Coulter through Lyra’s eyes, with light, twinkling music and a sparkling dress. By contrast, before the show introduces Coulter it tells us she’s associated with the evil Magisterium plotting Asriel’s death- “Not a word to any of our mutual friends. Including her.” Then she’s introduced striding down a corridor to imposing ‘Bad Guy’ strings.

Making Mrs Coulter’s villainy so obvious so early makes Lyra look dumber for falling for it. It also wastes an interesting phase of her character arc. Coulter is rushed into being a ’conflicted evil mother’ in 2 episodes, and stays in that phase for the rest of the show so far. Character progression is minimised because she circles the same place.

It makes her one-note. It's a good note (so much of the positive online chatter is saphiccs worshiping Ruth Wilson) but the show also worships her to the point of hindrance- e.g. take a shot every time Coulter walks slow-motion down a corridor in 2x2

The problem isn’t the performances, but how prematurely they give the game away. Just like the mysteries around Bolvangar and Lyra’s parentage. Neither Coulter or Asriel have much chance to use their 'public' faces.

This is part of a bigger pacing problem- instead of rolling plot points out gradually, Thorne will stick the solution in front of you early and then stall for time until it becomes relevant. Instead of building tension this builds frustration and makes the show feel like it's catching up to the audience. This also makes the characters less engaging. You've already shown Mrs Coulter is evil/Boreal is in our world/Asriel wants Roger. Why are you taking so long getting to the point?

PACING AND EDITING

This show takes forever to make its point badly.

Scenes in HDM tend to operate on one level- either 'Character Building,' 'Exposition,' or 'Plot Progression'.

E.g. Mary's introduction in 2x2. Book!Mary only listens to Lyra because she’s sleep and caffeine-deprived and desperate because her funding is being cut. But the show stripped that subtext out and created an extra scene of a colleague talking to Mary about funding. They removed emotional subtext to focus on exposition, and so the scene felt empty and flat.

In later episodes characters Mary’s sister and colleagues do treat her like a sleep-deprived wreck. But, just like Lyra’s lying, the show doesn’t establish these characteristics in her debut episode. It waits until later to retroactively tell us they were there. Mary’s colleague saying ‘What we’re dealing with here is the fact that you haven’t slept in weeks’ is as flimsy as Pan joking not lying to Mary will be hard for Lyra.

Rarely does a scene work on multiple levels, and if it does it's clunky- see the exposition dump about Daemon Separation in the middle of 2x2's Witch Trial.

He also splits plot progression into tiny doses, which destroys pacing. It's more satisfying to focus on one subplot advancing multiple stages than all of them shuffling forward half a step each episode.

Subplots would be more effective if all the scenes played in sequence. As it is, plotlines can’t build momentum and literal minutes are wasted using the same establishing shots every time we switch location.

The best-structured episodes of S1 are 1x4, 1x6, and 1x8. This is because they have the fewest subplots (incidentally these episodes have least Boreal in them) and so the main plot isn’t diluted by constantly cutting away to Mrs Coulter sniffing Lyra’s coat or Will watching a man in a car through his window, before cutting back again.

The best-written episode so far is 2x5. The Scholar. Tellingly, it’s the only episode Thorne doesn’t have even a co-writing credit on. 2x5 is well-paced, its dialogue is more naturalistic, it’s more focused, it even has time for moments of whimsy (Monkey with a seatbelt, Mrs Coulter with jeans, Lyra and Will whispering) that don’t detract from the story.

Structurally, 2x5 works because A) it benches Lee’s plotline. B) The Witches and Magisterium are relegated to a scene each. And C) the Coulter/Boreal and Lyra/Will subplots move towards the same goal. Not only that, but when we check in on Mary’s subplot it’s through Mrs Coulter’s eyes and directly dovetails into the main action of the episode.

2x5 has a lovely sense of narrative cohesion because it has the confidence to sit with one set of characters for longer than two scenes at a time.

HDM also does this thing where it will have a scene with plot A where characters do or talk about something, cut away to plot B for a scene, then cut back to plot A where the characters talk about what happened in their last scene and painstakingly explain how they feel about it and why

Example: Pan talking to Will in 2x7 while Lyra pretends to be asleep. This scene is from the 3rd book, and is left to breathe for many chapters before Lyra brings it up. In the show after the Will/Pan scene they cut away to another scene, then cut back and Lyra instantly talks about it.

There’s the same problem in 2x5: After escaping Mrs Coulter, Lyra spells out how she feels about acting like her

The show never leaves room for implication, never lets us draw our own conclusions before explaining what it meant and how the characters feel about it immediately afterwards. The audience are made passive in their engagement with the characters as well as the world

LORD BOREAL, JOHN PARRY AND DIMINISHING RETURNS

At first, Boreal’s subplot in S1 felt bold and inspired. The twist of his identity in The Subtle Knife would've been hard to pull off onscreen anyway. As a kid I struggled to get past Will's opening chapter of TSK and I have friends who were the same. Introducing Will in S1 and developing him alongside Lyra was a great idea.

I loved developing Elaine Parry and Boreal into present, active characters. But the subplot was introduced too early and moved too slowly, bogging down the season.

In 1x2 Boreal crosses. In 1x3 we learn who he's looking for. In 1x5 we meet Will. In 1x7 the burglary. 1 episode worth of plot is chopped up and fed to us piecemeal across many. Boreal literally stalls for two episodes before the burglary- there are random 30 second shots of him sitting in a car watching John Parry on YouTube (videos we’d already seen) completely isolated from any other scenes in the episode

By the time we get to S2 we've had 2 seasons of extended material building up Boreal, so when he just dies like in the books it's anticlimactic. The show frontloads his subplot with meaning without expanding on its payoff, so the whole thing fizzles out.

Giving Boreal, the secondary villain in literally every episode, the same death as a background character in about 5 scenes in the novels feels cheap. It doesn’t help that, after 2x5 built the tension between Coulter and Boreal so well, as soon as Thorne is passed the baton in 2x6 he does little to maintain that momentum. Again, because the subplot is crosscut with everything else the characters hang in limbo until Coulter decides to kill him.

I’ve been watching non-book readers react to the show, and several were underwhelmed by Boreal’s quick, unceremonious end.

Similarly, the show builds up John Parry from 1x3 instead of just the second book. Book!John’s death is an anticlimax but feels narratively justified. In the show, we’ve spent so much extra time talking about him and then being with him (without developing his character beyond what’s in the novels- Pullman even outlined John’s backstory in The Subtle Knife’s appendix. How hard would it be to add a flashback or two?) that when John does nothing in the show and then dies (he doesn’t even heal Will’s fingers like in the book- only tell him to find Asriel, which the angels Baruch and Balthamos do anyway) it doesn’t feel like a clever, tragic subversion of our expectations, it feels like a waste that actively cheapens the audience’s investment.

TL;DR giving supporting characters way more screentime than they need only, to give their deaths the same weight the books did after far less build up makes huge chunks of the show feel less important than they were presented to be.

FRUSTRATINGLY LIMITED EXPANSION AND NOVELLISTIC STORYTELLING

Thorne is unwilling to meaningfully develop or expand characters and subplots to fit a visual medium. He introduces a plot-point, invents unnecessary padding around it, circles it for an hour, then moves on.

Pullman’s books are driven by internal monologue and big, complex theological concepts like Daemons and Dust. Instead of finding engaging, dynamic ways to dramatise these concepts through the actions of characters or additions to the plot, Thorne turns Pullman’s internal monologue into dialogue and has the characters explain them to the audience

The novels’ perspective on its characters is narrow, first because Northern Lights is told only from Lyra’s POV, and second because Pullman’s writing is plot-driven, not character-driven. Characters are vessels for the plot and themes he wants to explore.

This is a fine way of writing novels. When adapting the books into a longform drama, Thorne decentralised Lyra’s perspective from the start, and HDM S1 uses the same multi-perspective structure that The Subtle Knife and The Amber Spyglass do, following not only Lyra but the Gyptians, Mrs Coulter, Boreal, Will and Elaine etc

However, these other perspectives are limited. We never get any impression of backstory or motivation beyond the present moment. Many times I’ve seen non-book readers confused or frustrated by vague or non-existent character motivations.

For example, S1 spends a lot of time focused on Ma Costa’s grief over Billy’s disappearance, but we never see why she’s sad, because we never saw her interact with Billy.

Compare this to another show about a frantic mother and older brother looking for a missing boy. Stranger Things uses only two flashbacks to show us Will Byers’ relationships with his family: 1) When Joyce Byers looks in his Fort she remembers visiting Will there. 2) The Clash playing on the radio reminds Jonathan Byers of introducing Will to the song.

In His Dark Materials we never see the Costas as a happy family- 1x1’s Gyptian ceremony focuses on Tony and Daemon-exposition. Billy never speaks to his mum or brother in the show

Instead we have Ma Costa’s empty grief. The audience has to do the work (the bad kind) imagining what she’s lost. Instead of seeing Billy, it’s just repeated again and again that they will get the children back.

If we’re being derivative, HDM had the chance to segway into a Billy flashback when John Faa brings one of his belongings back from a Gobbler safehouse in 1x2. This is a perfect The Clash/Fort Byers-type trigger. It doesn’t have to be long- the Clash flashback lasted 1:27, the Fort Byers one 55 seconds. Just do something.

1x3 beats into us that Mrs Coulter is nuts without explaining why. Lots of build-up for a single plot-point. Then we're told Mrs Coulter's origin, not shown. This is a TV show. Swap Boreal's scenes for flashbacks of Coulter and Asriel's affair. Then, when Ma Costa tells Lyra the truth, show the fight between Edward Coulter and Asriel.

To be clear, Thorne's additions aren’t fundamentally bad. For example, Will boxing sets up his struggle with violence. But it's wasted. The burglary/murder in 1x7 fell flat because of bad editing, but the show never uses its visual medium to show Will's 'violent side'- no change in camera angle, focus, or sound design, nothing. It’s just a thing that’s there, unsupported by the visual language of the show

The Magisterium scenes in 2x2 were interesting. We just didn't need 5 of them; their point could be made far more succinctly.

In 2x6 there is a minute-long scene of Mary reading the I Ching. Later, there is another scene of Angelica watching Mary sitting somewhere different, doing the SAME THING, and she sees an Angel. Why split these up? It’s not like either the I Ching or the Angels are being introduced here. Give the scene multiple layers.

Thorne either takes good character moments from the books (Lyra/Will in 2x1) or uses heavy-handed exposition that reiterates the same point multiple times. This hobbles the Witches (their dialogue in 2x1, 2 and 3 literally rephrases the same sentiment about protecting Lyra without doing anything). Even character development- see Lee monologuing his and Mrs Coulter's childhood trauma in specific detail in 2x3

This is another example of Thorne adding something, but instead of integrating it into the dramatic action and showing us, it’s just talked about. What’s the point of adding big plot points if you don’t dramatise them in your dramatic, visual medium? In 2x8, Lee offhandedly mentions playing Alamo Gulch as a kid.

I’m literally screaming, Jack, why the flying fuck wasn’t there a flashback of young Lee and Hester playing Alamo Gulch and being stopped by his abusive dad? It’s not like you care about pacing with the amount of dead air in these episodes, even when S2’s run 10 minutes shorter than S1’s. Lee was even asleep at the beginning of 2x3, Jack! He could’ve woken from a nightmare about his childhood! It’s a little lazy, but better than nothing.

There’s a similar missed opportunity making Dr Lanselius a Witchling. If this idea had been introduced with the character in 1x4, it would’ve opened up so many storytelling possibilities. Linking to Fader Coram’s own dead witchling son. It could’ve given us that much-needed perspective on Witch culture. Imagine Lanselius’ bittersweet meeting with his ageless mother, who gave him up when he reached manhood. Then, when the Magisterium bombs the Witches in 2x2, Lanselius’ mother dies so it means something.

Instead it’s only used to facilitate an awkward exposition dump in the middle of a trial.

The point of this fanfic-y ramble is to illustrate my frustration with the additions; If Thorne had committed and meaningfully expanded and interwoven them with the source material, they could’ve strengthened its weakest aspect (the characters). But instead he stays committed to novelistic storytelling techniques of monologue and two people standing in a room talking at each other

(Seriously, count the number of scenes that are just two people standing in a room or corridor talking to each other. No interesting staging, the characters aren’t doing anything else while talking. They. Just. Stand.)

SEASON 2 IMPROVEMENTS

S2 improved some things- Lyra's characterisation was more book-accurate, her dynamic with Will was wonderful. Citigazze looked incredible. LMM won lots of book fans over as Lee. Mary was brilliantly cast. Now there are less Daemons, they're better characterised- Pan gets way more to do now and Hester had some lovely moments.

I genuinely believe 2x1, 2x3, 2x4 and 2x5 are the best HDM has been.

But new problems arose. The Subtle Knife lost the central, easy to understand drive of Northern Lights (finding the missing kids) for lots of smaller quests. As a result, everyone spends the first two episodes of S2 waiting for the plot to arrive. The big inciting incident of Lyra’s plotline is the theft of the alethiometer, which doesn’t happen until 2x3. Similarly, Lee doesn’t search for John until 2x3. Mrs Coulter doesn’t go looking for Lyra until 2x3.

On top of missing a unifying dramatic drive, the characters now being split across 3 worlds, instead of the 1+a bit of ours in S1, means the pacing/crosscutting problems (long establishing shots, repetition of information, undercutting momentum) are even worse. The narrative feels scattered and incohesive.

These flaws are inherent to the source material and are not the show’s fault, but neither does it do much to counterbalance or address them, and the flaws of the show combine with the difficulties of TSK as source material and make each other worse.

A lot of this has been entitled fanboy bitching, but you can't deny the show is in a bad place ratings-wise. It’s gone from the most watched new British show in 5 years to the S2 premiere having a smaller audience than the lowest-rated episode of Doctor Who Series 12. For comparison, DW's current cast and showrunner are the most unpopular since the 80s, some are actively boycotting it, it took a year-long break between series 11 and 12, had its second-worst average ratings since 2005, and costs a fifth of what HDM does to make. And it's still being watched by more people.

Critical consensus fluctuates wildly. Most laymen call the show slow and boring. The show is simultaneously too niche and self-absorbed to attract a wide audience and gets just enough wrong to aggravate lots of fans.

I’m honestly unsure if S3 will get the same budget. I want it to, if only because of my investment in the books. Considering S2 started filming immediately after S1 aired, I think they've had a lot more time to process and apply critique for S3. On the plus side, there's so much plot in The Amber Spyglass it would be hard to have the same pacing problems. But also so many new concepts that I dread the exposition dumps.

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kcenvs3000f24 · 3 months ago

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Hi Emily!

Your method of nature interpretation really appeals to me, especially the way you emphasize giving learners tactile and visual experiences. You thoughtfully incorporate different learning styles for engagement, which I find is so important in nature education. I can see your creativity is highlighted in your lesson plans, as you tailor them to different age groups such as using more structured activities for teenagers and hands-on scavenger hunts for younger children. As a child, I remember going on several field trips to conservation areas with my school, and they always included hands-on activities to keep us engaged. With that being said, I really like the lesson plan approach you would take for primary elementary students.

It's a great idea to immerse participants in the environment and make their learning experience more memorable through storytelling, scavenger hunts, and outdoor playtime. Your adaptation to who you’re working with really shows your skill in understanding your audience’s needs. I also agree that organization is crucial in this role or even in any role of nature interpretation. It’s important to balance time effectively while making sure that all types of learners gain something valuable from the experience. By combining your skills as a tactile and visual learner with your desire to connect with others, you have a unique ability to inspire people of all ages to engage with and appreciate nature in a meaningful way.

Overall, great job on your post!

Unit 2 Blog Post

Hi Everyone!

As a learning environmental interpreter, I would ideally like to be working in-person with groups or one-on-one. My future goal is to be a teacher and I enjoy conveying information to people in multiple ways. This would fit the role of a curator or naturalist teacher.

I am personally a visual and tactile learner, which I think lends itself really well to nature interpretation. I think guided tours, walks, seminars, and even just outdoor playtime for kids provide great opportunities for learning. I feel like lesson plans could entail stories, scavenger hunts, observing nature, collecting data, and guided walks. The beauty of nature interpretation is that it is a pretty flexible experience. These ‘lesson plans’ can be molded to different age demographics and locations. For example, if I had a group of teenagers in the Arboretum here in Guelph, I might do a short spiel about the history of the Arboretum, lead a walk, and then set up an activity where they can look for specific tree-types, learn about navigation, and/or observe types of native species. However, if I had a group of primary elementary students, I might set up a more hands-on experience where I would ask them to look for a fluffy, round, pointy, and rough object and we can learn what each object is called, and maybe do an arts and crafts activity.

Nature interpretation is also flexible in terms of the leader and the skillset that they possess. Someone that might not be a great storyteller might be really knowledgeable in forestry or horticulture. There are a multitude of ways to present information, and certain skills can lend themselves well to teaching said information. I personally like to connect to people emotionally, find out their interests and who they are as a person. This helps me to adjust the way I might teach them and how I lead my role. I think organization and clarity in nature interpretation is the keystone to leading a successful role. I must be clear in my goal and use my time wisely to convey my message. Just because I am a tactile and visual learner, does not mean that everyone is, and I have to be able to organize the information in a way that combines aspects of every type of learner. The goal is for everyone to walk away having learned at least one thing.

Even if my role might be a curator, there is such importance in connecting with people. There is no use in coming up with lesson plans and information to tell people if it is not translating well to the learners. Nature interpretation is a holistic experience and can be very memorable if done effectively.

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natural-hazard · 3 years ago

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Language games and "why do you care?"

epistemic status: wailing and gnashing of teeth The sexual tension between the terms "pragmatic" and "meaningful". We've leaned towards using pragmatic more, I believe because Spendo and Crispith love them some William James. The thing that underlies both of them is this sense of hooking in to what matters to you. I could do without the word "pragmatic"s association with a particular narrow view of what can matter ("his head was in the clouds, he had all these big ideas but no pragmatic inclinations"). I bemoan "meaningful" and "meaning"s rumored (big if true!) association with, well.... "meaningless shit that doesn't connect to real humans, and is something that people play act at". Pragmatic evokes imagery of my "no-nonsense" grandpa who worked at a glass manufacturing plant his whole life and always focused on providing for his family. Meaningful evokes my artsy-fartsy sister who's desperately trying to escape the capitalist machine by trying to become a shaman in Ecuador. Take David Chapman's post (but give it back when you're done, the internet runs out after a while) Meaningful Perception. From our point of view it could just as easily be called "Pragmatic Perception". The structure of how you perceive is shaped by the structure of how you care. When we talk about pragmatic classification systems, though I defs expect lumber-jacks to be more like my grandpa than my sister, we're tapping into the sense in which classification systems are made by people who care about stuff, and are using the classification systems to get more hooks into interacting with what they care about. As it has been, and as it shall be, talking about care can spawn plenty of strife. Because I'm not referencing the things that your self-concept or your Narrative Self (explanation needed, not forthcoming, life's cruel ain't it?) say that you care about. I don't care about what other people think of me... except, of course for all the ways that I do. Having a self-image defined via negative traits (I'm not this, I'm not that) involves paying just as much attention to how others asses you as for positive ones.

"How can you not care?!"

Sometimes it's shouted in a tone of self-righteous indignation. Sometimes it's blurted out in a confused state of reality-shock. Sometimes it comes out as barely more than a whisper, a quiet spell soaked in sadness trying to magik reality into being other than it is. Hypothetical: you and your friends have a little group where y'all get together and talk about movies. Old and new, low brow and high brow, anything that's been on a screen. You gain a reputation in your broader social network as The Movie Folk, ones who are wise in the ways of film, those of nuanced takes and discerning gaze. One day, you find out your friend Ihsmael (it's always an Ihsmael isn't it?), who by the way is one of the more respected and venerated critics in your group, has never watched any of the films you all talk about. He watched a few movies growing up, but decided he doesn't actually enjoy watching films that much and hasn't seen any since he was 8. I can image one who has righteous indignation. WTF Ishmael? The rest of us have been putting in the work for years, and you've just been reading the plot on wikipedia and mashing up takes you found on the obscure and weirdly high quality forum that no one else happened to know? You've cheated! You're a sham! You don't deserve all the adoration you get for your hot takes, I demand you immediately refund everyone who ever gave you social capital! I can imagine one who's brain momentarily glitches as they try to understand how the fuck this is even possible. Why... have you been hanging out in our explicitly movie centric friend crew for multiple years when you don't watch films? The reality-shock alternates between "this makes so little sense I most be missing something" and the existential horror of realizing another human can look at the art you prize most and only care about a minuscule superficial aspect of it (critiquing with friends). Maybe you don't see them as committing status fraud, but you can't help but think that they live in a small sad world, content with only shadows of the real. ---------------------------- Variation in what people care about is fine. Not everyone needs to love A Serious Man as much as me. What's tragic is when I see systematic forces attempting to destroy ways of caring. In one of my favorite blog posts on the internet, Ben Hoffman talks about such an experience when trying to share with a friend a new technique he learned called Goal Factoring (pick some goal you have, see if it's actually you trying to get a few different things which are actually separable as in you could satisfy each of them better by trying to achieve them in different ways)

Naturally, I wanted to share this with others. When I got back home to DC, I tried to teach goal factoring to the Less Wrong meetup there. One participant told me that they'd had a hard time engaging, because their experience with any exercise around explicitly describing goals pattern-matched to things they'd been forced to do in school. For instance, they described an exercise they'd been forced to do at the beginning of the school year. The first step was to list a goal for the year (usually for that particular class), and the next steps were about figuring out how they'd accomplish that goal. They didn't really have specific goals in mind, so they had to make something up. Usually something that they imagined the teacher might approve of. They had effectively been trained to think of reasoning explicitly about goals as something where you have to follow someone else's rules, and has little to do with getting what you actually want. It should be easy to see how this might poison the whole thing. If someone's had enough experiences like that, where something that sort of looks like explicitly reasoning about goals is forced on them in nonsense ways, they might be ruined for goal factoring – and for many other things.

This breaks my heart. The particular connection to the particular technique that is goal factoring isn't important. But the fact that a person's interaction with the school system has effectively poisoned their ability to apply the entirety of their mind the timeless question "what do I see as the good life, and how shall I pursue it?" Many moons ago, in highschool, I suggested to a group that we get gyros, which I pronounced "j-eye-rows". Some nasally voiced twerp "ummmmm AKTUALLY it's pronounced 'year-ohs'". "Great", I thought to myself, "I will now never in my life ever pronounce it the way this fucko just suggested." Many. Such. ✨Cases✨. Schools at their worst (and also at their medium) act as 12 year programs who's end result is smashing one's ability to genuinely care about huge swathes of reality. ----------------------------- Which takes us back to language games (what, you don't remember us ever being at language games? Pal, we've always been at language games). I need to go to work now, so you figure out the connection. It's something like: language games fight each other. Language games have macro-structure (The Situation you are in and it's logic) and micro-structure (how do words actually combine to mean anything?). When people care about vastly different things, it changes the relationship between macro and micro structure of a language game. Two apsie nerds discussing trains is a language game that has a macro-structure, but it's less salient than the specific details they're conveying to each other via highly systematic micro-structure. Two dudes hurling insults at each other in a bar, The Situation screens off other details. The macro screens off the micro. The point of an insult is that it peforms the Insult Move in A Situation. It doesn't matter to much if I call your dad an ass-hat or your mom a cuck. The meaning of the micro is used to understand the move in the macro, and is then unimportant (except via contributing to a certain aesthetic quality and intensity to the macro move). Some macro-structures want to destroy micro-structures that I care a lot about. I aim to do something about this.

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brooksnnuk147 · 3 years ago

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illnessfaker · 4 years ago

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[ cw: f-slur, rape mention ]

no reblogs pls. this is a long vent.

haha not to be a hysterical faggot crippled shut-in freak or anything but the way ppl talk abt the defensiveness around the f-slur that some gay/bi male users (and some transfem users) on here as if it's some kind superiority pissing contest thing and not primarily about...respecting the boundaries and experiences of those gay/bi male (and transfem) users. like...being on this site as a fag-adjacent person (i say that half-jokingly because it sounds silly on one hand but on the other that's the most accurate descriptor of my gender identity, lol) is becoming increasingly draining and upsetting with how "progressive" homophobia against gay/bi men is apparently becoming, like, a meme among lgbtq people and that's acceptable somehow bc lgbtq people aren't cishets or because it's "only online" and therefore doesn't matter.

like idgaf abt ppl who aren't gay/bi men (or transfem) using the f-slur in every single context possible. if they're affectionately referring to their gay/bi male (or transfem) friends with that word (so long as said friends are comfortable with it) that's one thing. who cares. i even rb'd something where a cis butch (iirc) lesbian was talking about a gay man she knew who she was affectionatly calling a faggot and the things she said warmed my heart. if they're throwing it around at every opportunity or using it as an edgy insult against random strangers on the internet, that's another. the users on here who do the latter also regularly display behavior that like...shows a pretty clear disdain for gay/bi men (or transfem ppl) not apart of their online or "irl" circlejerks and echo chambers, and that is in no way disconnected from their love of using the f-slur, lol.

the "it's only online and so it's unimportant uwu go outside" thing also really feels like such a spit in the face as someone who both lives in a rural area full of cishet white men with guns that might try to kill me if i walked out of the house in drag (not to mention i live with my bf and his family and his parents are homophobes themselves i'm sure), and is also someone with health issues that usually keep me at home and in bed when i'm not working. i didn't always live here but even in my hometown the only "lgbtq space" i had was the high school GSA which didn't do shit other than the day of silence and was attended by people i did not feel safe around (e.g. my ex-friend who was very emotionally manipulative and ended up raping someone.) i don't have any other lgbtq spaces to go to other than online ones. if i never joined tumblr i might still be a self-hating cishet girl, or i might be dead, who knows. like, i've accepted at this point that personhood isn't something i'm allowed in (outside of my whiteness) so fuck me i guess if we need to but the idea that other young, impressionable, and/or traumatized lgbtq people who only can meet other lgbtq people and learn about lgbtq things online for whatever reason don't deserve to have us make an effort on cultivating internet spaces that are as accessible and safe for them as possible, or that their experiences and feelings are somehow unimportant is just...vile. like ofc not everyone needs to "pander" to "logged on" disabled fags like myself maybe but if you have any kind of large following on social media maybe consider that the things you say and do on said social media have like...an actual effect on other people instead of pretending that it's "just online" and therefore consequences for your actions either don't matter enough (to you personally) or somehow don't exist.

but going back to the fag thing, most popular lgbtq tumblr users on my dash i see nowadays just...simply do not give a shit whatsoever about gay/bi men, to the point they're normalizing "progressive" and "acceptable" homphobia against us bc they've convinced themselves due to the bigotry some gay/bi men (often cis, white, and wealthy mind you) exhibit we are "the cishets of the lgbtq community," despite horrific violence still being committed against us every day and despite other lgbtq people being capable of engaging in that violence themselves. ppl make thinly veiled jokes and memes where the punchline is men having sex with each other or effeminacy as if those things aren't primary avenues for gay/bi men being abused, assaulted, and killed (including acts of abuse and assault of a sexually-driven nature), as if said jokes and memes don't serve to normalize the mentalities that drive homophobic hate crimes. it's not like...a coincidence that most lgbtq people who makes these jokes aren't gay/bi men (or transfem). this doesn't even get into how things like homophobia and anti-effeminacy can pretty much boot certain gay/bi men from manhood...or womanhood...or any place in gender altogether.

call me exlusionary if you want but i think it's fair to say that the chances of people who aren't gay/bi men (or transfem*) facing the repurcussions of those mentalities in any meaningful way, the chances of these people actually having lived as or going to live as "faggots" is any meaningful sense is slim to none, and that's why they're so comfortable participating in this shit, and that's why i'm triggered(tm) by them "reclaiming" faggot (which doesn't really involve reclamation bc calling random strangers on the internet or gay/bi men you hate a slur isn't reclamation you morons), because frankly if you're not apart of either of those groups, you're just not a fucking faggot. it's not your word just because some rando on overwatch called you it for picking hanzo in comp. period. end of story. it's also just extremely absurd to try and claim faggotry as something you experience while...readily and happily engaging in homophobia and fag-hate (which isn't synonymous with the former term but i'm talking abt ppl who probably seldom ever engage which discussions and theory surrounding how homophobia instrumentates itself in society - or at least that which doesn't conform to their worldview). within the gay/bi male community there's plentu of masc "straight-acting" gays who weaponize this shit against fem gays and they (should) get held accountable in the same way. you're not special.

and god, being told my gendered experiences as a fag-adjacent person where (white) cafab women are fully capable of engaging in social forms of "oppression" against me and other fags in undeniably gendered ways is somehow an outlier and therefore not reflective of broader social by (white) masc urbanite tbros with definitively more social standing than i'll ever have in my life, as if i somehow developed this understanding of gendered violence just based off my own life and not...the reported and sometimes even recorded experiences of countless other fags who get mocked and silenced because anything that deviates from a watered down, shoddy cis feminist take on gender is fake news(tm) or bordering on saying misandry exists (like no it doesn't exist but acting as if homophobic shit like anti-sodomy laws, for example, has zero to do with gay/bi men's manhood is just nonsensical). convos on here abt gender being mostly dominated by (white) cafab women or sometimes (white) masc trans guys is such a mistake lmao.

anyway i'm tired and stressed and pretty done with having "acceptable" homophobic shit shoved in my face on a daily basis both online and offline but nevertheless i must persist because i'm not lucky enough to have anywhere else to go, really. just...think critically abt ur actions regarding gay/bi male sexuality and gender-stuff pretty please. please.

( *disclaimer just in case that i definitely don't see transfems as some "type" of gay/bi men. there are transfems who identify with gay/bi manhood and/or faggotry. there are transfems who don't. that's entirely up to them. thank u. )

#op #🌙#homophobia #gender #site culture #no reblogs -

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bi-outta-cordonia · 4 years ago

Text

In Another World, Part II

The continuation of the Colt x MC piece I was hoping to finally put out for @rodappreciationweek. The week itself is over, so this is just me slamming chapters up hoping to finally do a thing I’ve been thinking about for a minute!

Part I --> here!

Ride or Die: A Bad Boy Romance. Colt Kaneko x f!MC(Deidre Wheeler). PG-13, with warnings going out to Brandon’s rancid vibes. ~4k words.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Seventeen, eighteen—her keyboard clacks in steady strokes, each letter spelling out a larger plan that should take no more than three years and some change to complete if she works hard enough. Every orientation event is over. Every “meet and greet” has long since burned the flames of excitement out her bones. Extracurriculars, plus honors programs, plus a few personal hobbies will fill her free time in between classes. But the main question again…

Seventeen credits or eighteen credits?

Deidre’s hands hover over the keyboard and she chews her lip.

“I know it’s not my business…” Deidre tosses a look back at Ingrid, her pouty lips pursed and her brow drawn. Ingrid glances pointedly at the open document on the computer screen. “We’re definitely still doing the competition thing, right? Pushing each other or whatever?” Deidre nods slowly. “Which is cool! But like…I don’t want you to burn out before we really get into it!”

Deidre frowns. “You’re taking seventeen credits.”

“Yeah, but that’s because I’m doing my lab first!” Ingrid waltzes up and clicks to the next screen, displaying the course load Deidre painstakingly puts together months before the first day of classes. “Do your lab first, duh. You already have a bunch of high school credits for the 100 levels.”

“But I’d still have to drop a class,” Deidre says.

Ingrid rolls her eyes. “God, I respect you so much but you can really be irritating.”

Deidre balks. “Alright—”

“Here, take a bullshit class and you can keep your seventeen.” Ingrid clicks a few buttons and lands on a page describing a philosophy class. She squints at the screen. “Blah blah blah, classical and modern conceptions of love, blah blah. You just need to get an A and you’ll be solid, yeah?”

Deidre shakes her head and turns her attention back to the screen.

“A look at the ways in which classical and modern conceptions of love and romance have changed over the natural course of time. What the course aims to do is interrogate how love has been defined and shaped by society and cultures. Bring an open mind and an equally open heart to a two day a week lecture!”

Seems simple enough.

Day one doesn’t fully prepare her for the sheer amount of bodies filling every concrete path between her and the rest of Langston. The way she works out her schedule, serious classes take place Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. “Bullshit electives” (Ingrid’s words) occupy her Tuesdays and Thursdays for the time being. One class that focuses on life skills and the other is apparently a philosophy class about love.

A comfortable pair of jeans and even more comfortable sneakers gets her through the throngs of people jockeying for space on the sidewalks. Some souls are brave (or foolish?) enough to bike through the madness but she remembers her favorite self-defense trick from her father—throw them bows.

Deidre shoves her way to Terrence Hall and wanders around the building twice before she finds the lecture room. “Room” because it’s small like a classroom and filled from front to back with desks. The age of the building shows in some of the dusty corners and faded paint on the walls. A good number of her peers sit scattered throughout the room, some leaning on desks and carrying on with casual conversations. A few of them eye her as she walks in. Their gazes immediately catch her old shoes and even older jeans. It’s almost funny how the braids and brown skin are the last things they see—at Mar Vista, it was the first but she at least had four years to show them all the money their parents had still couldn’t afford them a brain like hers.

She takes a seat in the front and rummages through her bag when she sets it down. Notebook, lead pencil, laptop open and ready—a long ten minutes pass and the professor walks in holding a cup of coffee.

He’s a small man and most certainly older.

“Thirty of you this year! Much less than I usually get for the fall semester,” he exclaims. His eyes scan over the class and the collective mood drops in an instant. Most of the students are sophomores. A lot of them are just trying to bang out electives first and this was one of the easiest classes the university offers. “Well, anyway—introductions, yes? As many of you should know by now, I am Professor Pines.” Some of the students giggle. “Yes, yes, terrible name, isn’t it? Regardless, I’d rather not spend too much time reflecting on my family’s awful choices in naming conventions.”

He hands a stack of papers to a girl in the front who passes the papers back. A steady stream of motion fills the room as students pass around what she assumes is the syllabus. When she receives her copy, she purses her lips:

20% for quizzes—

15% participation—

15% mid semester report—

25% group project—

25% final exam—

She almost groans along with the rest of the class when they all see it—group project. Professor Pines seems a bit too gleeful despite knowing he’s just cast them all to their doom.

“The basics of the course first,” he starts. “As this is a philosophy class, most of the materials we’ll be working with are going to come from a variety of readings we’ll be doing, examining facets of love and romance across multiple sources to answer that big question that hangs over us all—what exactly is love? What does it entail and how do we define it?” The professor clasps his hands behind his back and looks out over each student. “There are about a thousand ways to describe love but I want to have you all truly engage the topic. How we see it, experience it, and demonstrate it varies wildly and I’m eager to see what the lot of you come up with. Now, if you could all—”

The door opens and the professor stops for a brief moment. He continues with his next topic but it’s hard not to notice him digging through the papers on the table near him as he searches for a spare syllabus for his newest student.

Deidre sits up and thinks the weird boy from the frat party might recognize her as he scans the room for a seat. His eyes find her for all of a second before he struts down the path and takes a seat at the back of the room. She sucks her teeth and turns her attention back to the professor.

He goes on for a long while covering the basics and answering questions as he goes. Most of the students are just using the class to fill up electives—her included. Engagement seems like it’ll be interesting compared to her other classes but at the very least, she’s going to put some effort in. She took top spot back home and she’s going to have to work hard for even the smallest chance at achieving that out here.

“Before I let you all go, I just want to ask…” Professor Pines steeples his fingers, eyes intently watching the class. “What is love?”

His gaze rakes across the length of the room, each student slinking down in their seat and holding a careful breath as they gauge whether he’s the sort that will call on people or let them speak on their own. The silence lasts for a few more minutes until Deidre raises her hand.

The professor beams and the classroom lets out a collective sigh.

“Love can defined in a number of ways but the most basic would point to it being a psychological effect between individuals with well-defined social bonds,” she answers. “It can be a series of emotions, complex affections, and highly specific in terms of behavioral patterns defined by the parameters of a person’s relationship with the object of said love.”

Professor Pines nods approvingly and looks up. “Yes? In the back?”

“It’s a collective of impulses disguised as particular receptors in the brain that dictate meanings behind specific actions.” Deidre turns around in her seat and catches the boy from the party bringing his coffee to his lips for a sip. “Doesn’t always have to be deeper than that—sometimes the brain just does weird shit and we run around trying to add meaning where there doesn’t need to be.”

The class buzzes and Professor Pines seems even more giddy.

“Ah, a realist!” he says and the boy shrugs. “I always get one! Perspective is going to be key here, both in your understandings of the material and of what you take away from this class.”

Deidre raises her hand. “But the whims themselves would become receptors based on the emotional bond between the individuals in question, wouldn’t they? People can act out of a sense of impulse but love requires those impulses be tailored to prior experience with an individual.”

The boy snorts. “Not necessarily. People can say or do something under the guise of love but that doesn’t necessarily make it so. It’s the brain assigning meaning to whims.”

She bristles. “The presence of whims would require a prior interaction that shapes it.”

“Does it? I mean, I don’t believe in that ‘love at first sight’ crap but the existence of such narratives makes a pretty strong case for love being just the brain trying to find ways to assign meanings—”

“Which still can be explained through a prior interaction because ‘love at first sight’ still requires some form of meaningful—”

“And there’s the idealist,” the professor says, nodding thoughtfully. Professor Pines continues, “I don’t really want to keep any of you any longer, so please make sure to read over the syllabus.” He pauses for a moment, glancing between the front and the back of the room. “I have a feeling this is going to be an interesting semester.”

Deidre glances around and sinks a little in her seat at the other students tossing looks between her and the boy from the party. When she looks back at him, he lifts a brow and takes a languid sip of his coffee.

“Don’t ask me about that,” Deidre snaps. “I don’t even want to talk about it.”

“That bad?” Riya snorts.

“He’s a douchebag! He actually tried to pull some bullshit devil’s advocate crap day one of the entire semester and he wouldn’t even tell me his fucking name at the party!” Deidre dodges a couple rushing out the dorm and ignores Riya’s cackling.

“I mean, he sounds pretty hot…”

“Riya!” Deidre yanks her phone away from her ear and glares daggers at it. Her teeth grind as Riya’s raucous laugh rings through the tinny speakers and she lets out a roar that has heads turning her way. “You’re being a bad friend!”

“You have a crush on him! Look—Deidre—”

“I’m hanging up on you. Hand to God, I will absolutely end this call right now—“

“Oh my god, stop being dramatic.”

“And of course he shows up ten minutes late to class with Starbucks in hand—didn’t even give a fuck about everyone staring at him or the fact that he chose to further disrupt everything by walking his—” She fumbles her keys at first but eventually jams the metal into the door, “—stupid—dumb!”

Ingrid sits up but Deidre only gives a small wave as she quite literally throws herself on her own bed. She puts Riya on speaker and tosses the phone on her nightstand.

“Dee?”

“Hey Riya!” Ingrid says. Her eyes dart between Deidre and the phone. “Everything okay?”

“Deidre’s got a crush.”

“Shut up.” Deidre rolls over and faces the wall. “There’s a douchebag in my class.”

Ingrid pauses for a long moment. “Like frat boy rich douchebag or just regular smegular rich douchebag?”

“She’s got budding sexual tension with a boy that’s probably as smart as she is.”

“Riya—” Deidre pinches the bridge of her nose.

“Oh, mood.” Ingrid readjusts her glasses. “If he’s as hot as the dude you saw at the frat party, I’ll be the first to say you should go for it.”

Deidre braces.

“Speaking of which—”

“Riya.”

“You wouldn’t believe it but it just so happens—”

“I’MHANGINGUPTHEPHONEGOODBYE.”

A profound silence hangs in the room like the most uncomfortable and bloated thing in the world. Ingrid keeps penning away on her notebook and occasionally peeks at the textbook lying open next to her. Deidre lets the silence fester as she gets up and digs through her bag, pulling out notebooks and textbooks to get started on her own work.

An hour passes before Ingrid speaks up. “Ohhhhh…it was the hot guy from the frat party, wasn’t it?”

Deidre pointedly ignores her.

Three hours and seventeen minutes. She times herself only because it’s necessary. Darius used to joke and say she was going “beast mode” when she got so into her work that time just stops existing as a concept.

Even if time stops existing, hunger doesn’t so it comes as no surprise that her tummy growls when she finally shuts her last textbook. Day one and she’s already diving deep—perfect. She stretches as she gets up and grabs her keychain.

The dining hall is something else entirely. A bevy of appetizing foods fill the buffet and even more is served by the dedicated cooking staff, of which are all chefs of significant renown if she remembers correctly from the online facilities tour.

Stepping through the doors almost feels like stepping into another dimension. Extensive wood finish fills in every panel of the floor, mahogany furniture with fine leather seats make up a sitting area, and ornate paintings hang on all the walls. Her stomach gurgles again when the smell of baked chicken wafts in her nose. Deidre makes a beeline towards wherever that smell leads her.

Rotisserie chicken, beans and rice, steamed vegetables perfectly seasoned, freshly prepared mango and passionfruit juice—

It isn’t even the most delectable thing from the kitchens: lobster bisque, the freshest produce, the most tender cuts of steak, oysters, and even more. Savory and sweet collide in a mesh of flavorful smells that sets her appetite from moderate to desperate. She swipes her card for her meal and carefully dodges students shuffling about the dining area.

“Oh, right…” she mumbles.

Seems like every person decided now was a fantastic time to get dinner. The dining hall is packed from top to bottom with students. Some sit in groups with textbooks and laptops out on the tables. Others sit off on their lonesome reading from books while absently shoveling spoonfuls in their mouths. There’s a group of extremely attractive girls that waltz past flanked by some fit boys all wearing identical shorts and boat shoes.

Deidre takes a few tentative steps forward and scans the room carefully.

There’s a butt in every seat. Some eyes dart towards her as she walks past but they don’t seem to mind her presence. Or maybe they just don’t care.

She finds an empty seat and moves to set her tray down when a girl clears her throat. The smile that spreads across the girl’s face is sickly sweet—she’s clearly not happy seeing a face trying to squeeze into such a big space and her eyes noting the simple style of Deidre’s fashion makes the smile spread a little wider.

“I’m waiting on some friends. Sorry,” the girl says, clearly not apologetic.

Deidre stares at her for a moment before shaking her head and turning back towards the packed dining hall. She starts her hunt anew when a hand touches her on the square of her back.

“Hey, Deidre, right?” She turns around and finds Brandon’s face. His gaze roams uncomfortably, where he looks she isn’t sure but she’s just as equally sure she doesn’t want him to do that. “Where’s Ingrid?”

“Uh, studying,” she says. “How’ve you been?”

He shrugs. “Day one, so nothing really exciting yet. How about you? First day of college going well?”

“Yeah, just—” She nods towards the full room, “—looking for a place to sit. I didn’t think so many people would be here.”

Brandon’s hand slides a little further up her back and there’s a pressure there that feels like he’s trying to guide her. Her feet lock in place even though her body sways and when she locks eyes with him, he’s staring at her like he’s trying to gauge his next move.

“You should come sit with me and my friends,” he suggests. He points out a table full of students with laptops sitting out. “We’re all STEM—engineering mostly. Ingrid said you were mechanical engineering, right?”

The whole reason she goes to that frat party is to try out new things as a young adult. Life here doesn’t have to be all about hitting the books, it’s about exploring and Ingrid attempts to give her that on the first night. Going back inside was for Ingrid’s sake then and for the remainder of the party, Brandon couldn’t seem to keep his eyes to himself. He wants to get to know her and she should try getting to know him but there’s just something so strange about this.

Her eyes dart around the room and a piercing gaze connects with hers.

The weird boy—the douchebag in the leather jacket.

He’s holding a book but he’s got it hovering over the table like he’s about to set it down. His gaze flits to Brandon behind her and he makes a subtle nod at the empty chair in front of him. He’s got his feet in it.

“Uh, actually…” Deidre steps away from Brandon and tries not to sigh in relief as his hand falls away from her back. She musters the best sheepish smile she can handle. “I just saw a friend! I’ll see you later!”

She wants to kick herself—she doesn’t want to see him again if she can’t help it. But it doesn’t matter now, getting away is all that’s important.

The weird boy moves his feet quickly and sits up in his chair. His gaze lingers on Brandon while she sits down and lets out a breath she didn’t know she was holding in.

“Is he gone?” she whispers.

He doesn’t answer her for a while. Eventually, he leans back again and opens up his book.

“You’re good.”

Silence fills the void between them as he occasionally flips through his book. Her confused stare morphs into an annoyed glare and she digs into her food once it becomes clear he’s done his one good deed of the day. Savory food fills her belly bite after bite and she swears to try the fried plantains next time. It won’t be anything like how her mom used to make, she’s sure, but the thought fills her with a sense of nostalgia.

She wonders what her dad’s doing right now.

He’ll be getting ready for work soon. The three hour time difference is still something she hasn’t gotten used to just yet but he doesn’t seem to mind getting “good morning” texts at six o’clock.

She sighs—he’ll have to find something to occupy his time now that she’s gone. He’s truly alone this time around.

Deidre looks up and the weird boy is staring straight at her. She hates his look almost as much as Brandon’s.

“What?” she says around a mouthful of food.

“You keep making weird noises and I’m debating on whether or not I want to ask what’s up with you,” he responds.

“You just—” She swallows her food. “I’m fine. Thank you for letting me sit down.”

He keeps looking at her and she tries her best to pointedly ignore him. Every so often her eyes dart to the book in his hand—Mount Washington by James Ashton.

“What’s really up with you?” Deidre looks up at him. He shuts the book and sets it next to his already empty tray. He crosses his arms and leans on the table, subtly glancing over her shoulder. “You were way too chipper for an eight o’ clock in the morning elective so I’m assuming you’re either new to campus or...”

His lips quirk when she narrows her eyes.

“Or?” she asks, already aware of the answer. “I’m a ‘nerd?’ God forbid someone takes their education seriously around here…”

He shrugs. “You still haven’t said what’s wrong with you.”

She chews on a bit of chicken slowly before swallowing, eyes finally connecting with his again. His are black as the night and striking. There’s nothing wrong with admitting he’s handsome in a boyish way. He tilts his head and her face grows a little warm.

“I was thinking about my dad,” she finally says. “It’s been the two of us for a while and I’m wondering what he’s going to do now that I’m not home.”

A small silence hangs between them.

“Where you from?” he asks.

“LA.”

The boy snorts. “Bullshit.” She fixes him with a questioning look and he shakes his head. “I’m from LA. I knew Mar Vista sounded familiar—you went to that prep school. State of the art or some shit.”

“It wasn’t all that, I promise you. Where’d you go?”

“Just a little further north—H.H. Huntington. Public school though, so nowhere near as fancy as what you got.” His face softens a bit though not nearly by much. “I left my mom back home but she’s had a year to figure out the benefits of having a house to herself by now. Your old man will get there soon.”

There’s a part of her that can’t help but think it’s a little sweet that his hard gaze softens further at the mention of his mother. Babies all grown up and flying out the nest is how their parents will see them. She wonders if her dad will even recognize her when she comes back—wonders if the boy’s mother has already accepted the young man that now walks through the doors when he comes home.

“You seemed pissed about earlier today.” His voice brings her back and she stabs at a piece of broccoli.

“In class, you mean,” she clarifies.

“Studious types—you can’t stand being wrong.”

“I wasn’t wrong—”

“And neither was I,” he interrupts. His eyes dart over her shoulder once more and she turns a bit just to follow his gaze. Brandon sits over with his friends and turns the minute her body starts shifting. The boy drums his fingers on his arm. “You done yet?”

“You were valedictorian, weren’t you?”

Her brows draw. “Why?”

“Chipper for an eight o’clock and you’re scared about the semester already…” He glances back over his shoulder. “And I told you Langston doesn’t take average kids.”

The boy is so weird. Not weird like Brandon is, which is the kind of weird that makes a person want to double bolt their doors. He’s weird in the sense that there’s a constant game of hot and cold that seems to fuel his every word. He’s perceptive—he remembers her mentioning Mar Vista despite only speaking to her for a total of two minutes. The last time she speaks with him (prior to dinner), he prods at her like an asshole kid poking at a hornet’s nest. His ability to pick things apart is apparent and—

Her brain literally stops.

Langston is filled with money. Langston is money. Average students means average in status only and it’s an extremely competitive school to get into.

Deidre’s eyes rake over the boy—his face, the leather jacket, the backpack slung over his back, and the white motorcycle helmet he holds in the other hand…

“You were…” It’s like the wheels are turning and his gaze immediately meets hers.

“Go on,” he quietly urges.

“You were the valedictorian of your school,” she manages.

He cracks a smile that she can only describe as vicious—she’s not sure why. “Yeah, this semester is about to be hilarious.”

She bristles. “You’re a dick.”

He smirks like he’s proud of it. “I’m walking you home, aren’t I?”

Deidre scoffs and turns away. Day one and she’s regretting some of her decisions already.

“I don’t even know your name,” she says.

“I don’t know yours either.”

“I tried to ask you at the frat party and you just blew me off,” she counters.

The boy shrugs. “My roommate wrapped up her date and I didn’t want to waste any more time. I guess I could tell you now but it’s way funnier thinking your name is...” A wicked smirk spreads across his face.

She looks at him. “Is what?”

“Stacy,” he says and laughs at the indignation on her face.

“It’s Deidre.”

“Or Becky,” he keeps prodding. “But ‘Deidre’ is nice. I bet people say it right.”

She sighs. “The first time, sure. But then they see the face that goes with the name and it’s impossible to get them to do it again.”

He goes quiet for a second. “Colt. And, no, it’s not short for anything. My last name’s the one that gets butchered though, but I’m not telling you that.”

Colt. His name is “Colt.”

“I prefer thinking of you as ‘the weirdo’,” she teases.

“Most girls save that kind of talk until after the first date.”

Deidre sucks her teeth.

“You think you can get away with things because you’re a smartass,” she bites.

“No, I get away with it because I’m cute. But if you want to go head to head over this, I won’t stop you.” Colt stops—they’ve reached the halfway point across campus. She looks up at him and feels one side of her brain wrestling with the other in the form of an oncoming headache. They stand there awkwardly (mostly on her part) until he nods down the path leading to her dorm. “Be careful, alright?”

So strange—one minute he’s a smartass and the next he’s being a white knight. Deidre wraps her arms around herself and nods.

“See you on Thursday…” She says, turning down the path. A quick glance over her shoulder and he stays rooted there until she gets a safe enough distance across the quad.

#playchoices #choices #colt kaneko #colt x mc #rod choices #choices rod #ride or die #ride or die: a bad boy romance

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mistress-morgan4 · 4 years ago

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30[F4M] #NC High Holy Hedonist Mother Goddess Seeks Loyal Weekly Servant For Long Term Worship Arrangement

I’ve heard your prayers my dearest. Your heart cried out to me when you caught a glimpse of the full moon. You wished for a world you’ve only dreamed about; you wished to be taken in hand, firm and warm and lovingly, examined and judged and found - whether you are found wanting, pathetic mortal that you are, or found wanted and cherished by the Great Mother Goddess - you ache to be found.

I’m here, darling. I’ve found you and I’m holding my hand open to offer you a safe haven. You don’t always feel like you fit into the world-at-large; it’s all so disposable and cheap and fast. You crave something in which to lose yourself every day, yearn to find a world far more rich and sensual than any glowing blue screen. You want to be loved but after so many failed relationships you’re not really sure what that would look like. When you let yourself wonder what it would be like - to be loved the way you deeply need but have never let yourself express - those fantasies go to dark humid places, crevices and corners you’re quite sure no one wants to look.

But hark! Beloved, I want to look deep into the hardest places and shine the light of my total acceptance upon you. I want to fill the back of your mind with the sounds and tastes and memories of your time spent in worship. I want you to always be aware and hungry for your next chance to humble yourself before me.

There are many important rules to abide by in order to serve me (but let’s be honest, you’re into that kind of thing.)

All messages of praise and adoration are welcome but like most divine beings I reserve the right to ignore your adulation.

You must read to the end of this post and respond appropriately to be considered.

You will be my servant and plaything to use, command and cherish. You will weep with joy at the honor of kneeling and worshipping my Holy Pussy, my Blessed Bush, the Great Mother writhing in orgasm as she gives birth to the world. I will guide you to reaching new heights of pleasure and I will lovingly, carefully, and thoroughly dismantle your heart, prying you open to see what makes you tick. While we are together, I will own you inside and out. Your submission will be emotional, mental, and physical; your orgasm, when I force you to look me in the eyes and command you to come, will be earth-shattering.

though I will not be constantly available to you. When you have me, you will have all of me, and I will overwhelm you with the force of my presence brought to bear on your pathetic mortal soul.

You must be comfortable engaging in extensive written and verbal negotiations and descriptions of how and why I will use and dominate you prior to meeting. We will cover your kinks, desires, shames, needs, fantasies and limits in great detail as well as my expectations and demands. This is to ensure we are a cohesive fit. I will not waste my time or yours unless we are able to thoroughly please each other, which requires excellent communication. I will not ghost you if I decide we are not compatible - I will clearly and directly explain my decision.

You will never forget that I am the Sacred, you are the Profane. Part of your submission to me requires your enthusiastic performance of chores including and not limited to house cleaning, photo assignments, errands, and other tasks. The experience I am offering is a time investment and my time and attention are extremely valuable.

Every moment you are mine will be intense and meaningful whether you are naked but for a lacy apron and rubber gloves scrubbing my toilet or meticulously sucking my toes while I sip a crisp pinot gris and tell you everything I love and hate about you or wearing a chastity cage while you take my packages to the post office. Every moment you are mine will be a moment basking in the almost-painful radiance of my scrutiny and judgement; those memories will carry you, glowing from the inside out, through the rest of your pathetic mundane life. Your time with me will be the only time you feel fully alive and you will crave it endlessly.

The love of a Goddess is a fearsome and and towering presence and I expect you to cower before me in awe. I have no strong preferences for your appearance; chemistry is chemistry and all are beautiful and stained by mortality in my eyes. In addition to your mundane services I will require your participation in the following holy activities.

Worshipping, massaging and grooming the Heavenly Cunt, the Blessed Feet, and the Holy Flesh.

Pegging. I expect to examine and test the sanctity of your hole and watch you writhe and scream and moan and thank me as you come on my merciful and generous cock. If you are new to pegging we will work up to this.

Orgasm denial. When and If you come it will be at my whim. While I have focused on the warmth of my blessings, as that is my ultimate nature, I can be capricious and cruel to serve the Higher Purpose. (Myself.)

Cock denial. However cherished you are for the whole of your being you are undeniably profane and The neither the Sacred Pussy nor the Sacred Ass will not be violated by your mortal worm.

That said, with time and effort you may be rewarded certain privileges such as cumming on my feet or breasts. You are my acolyte in pleasure, but you will learn that pleasure does not come just with cum.

Total obedience. Your role and my expectations will be discussed in detail in advance and within your time of worship I will expect your total obedience to my wishes. You will have a safeword and will practice using it.

Offerings and gifts. The gifts and offerings you make to me must come wholly from your heart to honor my Divinity and beg for my mercy when I push you to the edge. Regular cum tributes, especially when we are in the negotiations phase, will be expected. As a long term worshipper you will shower me with priceless tokens of affection and gratitude offerings in the form of handwritten notes, prayers, locks of hair, art through which I will guide and inspire you, et cetera.

Many, many more kinks I’m thrilled to describe in even more painstaking detail. However: I am not interested in pure masochism. I am a Hedonist and view all physical and mental suffering as paths to the greatest and most Transcendent pleasure. You should be interested in pain as one of many flavors of control I will wield over you but not the primary method; While I will shower you in the light and love of my Brilliant Presence you should also expect that I will humiliate you for the sake of my entertainment. I want to watch your little cock squirm in embarrassment and glee as I finger your pathetic wet slut hole. I will laugh at your dribbling mortal orgasms, when I allow your dribbling mortal orgasms, and pity that you’ll never come as hard as I do. (But I’ll still try to help you come as hard as I do, it’s quite fantastic.)

- This will be a cerebral, spiritual, magical experience for both of us with the goal of genuinely improving our lives. We will not be entangled outside of this arrangement; we will share the freedom to pursue other entangements provided we adhere to strict safety and testing rules. Again, your worthless little cock will not be permitted the Divine Cunt. In all play we will be safe, sane, and consensual foremost.

Are you still reading? I’m so proud of you darling, you’re an excellent candidate already. This is the kind of steadfast devotion and loyalty I demand from you. My every word is a Divine gift and blessing, a honeyed treat placed on your tongue, and you are helpless to stop devouring me. You are so hungry. You are so thirsty. You are willing to try so, so hard, and give so, so much, and at last I have arrived to save you from your aimless, empty life.

Is your cock hard and straining yet? I hope so darling. I do want to find you - I think we can offer each other so much.

Please continue.

You must format your application as follows. Incorrectly formatted submissions will not be considered.

Message Title: As you wish

Your name

Your preferred title(s) - choose all that apply: Slave, servant, worm, pig, little boy, bitch, slut, cunt, hole, darling, sweetness, honeybear, baby, etc

Or other: What shall I call you?

Describe first time you will serve me. For the sake of your fantasy, I am a red-headed green-eyed BBW. You will receive pictures - lots of them - when I deem you worthy.

What are your hard limits?

Have you ever experienced anxiety or fear during a BDSM scene or during other sexual activities?

What kind of aftercare do you need? (Snuggling, a shower, snacks?)

What is your safeword or do you prefer red/yellow/green?

Why should I choose you, little worm? What can you offer me?

#bd/sm community

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ohhhmyloki · 5 years ago

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NC-17 porn nonny here. Thanks so much for your help and explanation, cool cool cool cool just a crazy trickster god up in the bedroom. This is fine. Totally fine. . FOLLOW UP: have these uhhhh interactions helped or hindered your actual love life? Is energetic deity sex just so fucking turnt that you’re turned off by humans or Has it helped to you to open up to IRL ppl? For me the fanfic porn is honestly a little fantasy retreat away from disappointing menz

Hi again. Full disclosure, I haven’t actually had physical sex with anybody since inviting Loki into my life, but what sexual interaction I have had with irl people has been totally enriched by Loki–mainly because I’ve embraced my own sexuality on a much deeper level, i.e. I have greater comfort with my sexual desires and interests, and I’m more willing to explore beyond “traditional” sex (by which I mean cis-hetero-vanilla sex).

more below the cut

I do know quite a few Lokeans who have talked about how Loki enriches their sex lives with their partners, tho. For example, there’s a thing called “horsing” that deities can do, wherein they enter a human body and, for lack of a better word, possess it. You could also call it channeling a deity. Now, this isn’t usually the deity taking full control–more like heavily influencing the person they are horsing. I have had Loki do this to me, and when it happens, I can feel his feelings and urges, hear his thoughts, and share his pleasure. Sometimes, (usually with permission) he will do this with one member of a physical couple, which allows him to be a participant in the sex. Generally, this results in lowered inhibitions, more intense passion, and a willingness to be more experimental (because that’s the energy Loki usually brings to sex!). It all depends on the openness of the person acting as the vessel tho. If you’re really open, and you surrender to him deeply, it’s possible to let him have complete control over your body. He doesn’t really find that level of control to be necessary, however. He seems happy to be allowed to participate energetically in whatever way is comfortable for everyone involved.

However, a word of caution: horsing a deity is not something you want to just jump into willy-nilly. The spiritual opening required for it can be a bit risky–if you open yourself too wide and haven’t shielded yourself properly, you can end up inviting in something you really don’t want! In addition, before horsing any being, you should take great care that you have set boundaries on exactly what they’re allowed to do with your body. Horsing, imo, is an activity best reserved for beings with whom you have enormous familiarity, intimacy, and trust, and requires a certain level of experience in self-protection practices.

here’s a link with more info on horsing.

Now, the person who posted this information takes a particularly ominous view of it–which is legit for those who might engage in the practice without knowing wtf their doing. However, one thing they fail to point out is this: It is NOT difficult to rid yourself of most unwanted attachments (including instances of possession). There are countless divine beings who will happily assist you in doing so, if you simply ask. Likewise, said divine beings will happily assist you in preventing unwanted attachments. You just need to connect with a protective being you trust. For many years, I relied upon Archangel Michael. I am a natural born empath and channel (psychic medium) and I have dealt with countless nasty beings latching on to me. In most cases, all one need do to get rid of unwanted beings is ask Archangel Michael. (I am not Christian, Catholic, or religious at all, btw, and most divine beings dgaf what religion you are or are not!). Fenrir is another deeply protective being upon whom I rely. I have witnessed him pull negative entities off of people before. He is very good at it, and infinitely trustworthy. Apollon, as a sun/light/truth deity, is also quite adept at this. In fact, any deity with whom you have a meaningful connection will provide protection and clearing when asked. Ime, only when an attachment/possession has been allowed to go on for years does it require more than a polite request to a protective divine being for immediate and successful removal.

#loki #lokean #deity loki #polytheism #horsing #horsing a deity #channeling #sex with a deity #sex with loki #godspouse

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yesazea · 4 years ago

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How to Start a Conversation the Right Way

Some people just seem to possess a knack for creating conversation while others struggle to form chitchat. Knowing the way to start a conversation may be a useful social skill. Whether you would like to impress a possible client, strike up a conversation with a love interest, or simply chat with a replacement acquaintance, knowing the way to initiate a conversation can assist you to feel easier and assured during a big variety of social situations.

Before you start

If an area filled with strangers is your idea of a waking nightmare, the thought of getting to a celebration or work event is often incredibly daunting. These kinds of social situations are often especially difficult if you tend to be introverted, shy, or socially anxious.

One way to ease anxiety is to organize beforehand. Mentally review what you would like to speak about and even consider practicing with a lover. the primary step toward becoming a tremendous conversationalist it to be prepared.

If you're nervous about starting a conversation, try these three simple strategies before you begin:

1-Stay Positive:

Stop worrying about making an error and have faith in your abilities. Worrying an excessive amount of about what you're getting to say next can cause you to lose track of the conversation as it’s happening. Instead, attempt to stay focused on the opposite person and what they're saying.

2-Take a Deep Breath:

If you're tense and nervous, you're less likely to feel comfortable. attempt to stay relaxed and just let the conversation flow naturally.

3-Introduce Yourself:

one of the only ways to start is to only introduce yourself then give the opposite person the prospect to try to an equivalent. Once this first icebreaker has taken place, try asking an easy question or making an easy observation to assist inspire further discussion.

Conversation Killers

While it should go without saying, there are a couple of belongings you should avoid unless you're very conversant in the person with whom you're speaking.

While political commentary, gossip, complaints, and offensive jokes could be how your uncle starts conversations during your family get-togethers, it's probably not an example you ought to attempt to emulate in your day-to-day life.

Anything offensive, controversial, or uncomfortable should be avoided as you're initiating conversations.

There is a time and place to precise your opinion or maybe attempt to persuade others, but confirm that such topics are welcome before you get down to an impassioned debate.

Some research suggests that when it involves conversation openers, your best bet could also be to stay to fairly innocuous comments. In one study, participants were asked to rate the effectiveness of a variety of opening lines which may come from a possible romantic partner: flippant "pick-up" lines, open-ended, innocuous questions, and therefore the direct approach.

Few respondents appreciated the pick-up line approach, but responses attended be split when it came to preferences for the opposite two opening styles. Women attended to prefer the innocuous questions ("What's your favorite team?") while men favored the more direct approach ("I'd wish to buy you a drink!").

The authors of the study suggest that it's best to err on the side of the innocuous approach when choosing how to initiate a conversation with a stranger. this sort of conversation opener tends to be less threatening, yet encourages the opposite person to supply some sort of response.

Keep It Positive

Try to start your conversation on an upbeat note. stand back from launching into complaints or making negative observations. regardless of what things are, you'll find something positive to mention.

Comment on the weather, the food, the corporate, or the event itself. Saying something as simple as you're having an honest time and hoping that your conversation partner has a pleasing experience also may be a great way to urge a conversation rolling. albeit things itself isn't perfect, attempt to put a positive spin thereon.

Comments to steer With

“That was a very great presentation, wasn’t it?” “Whoever organized this event sure did an excellent job!” “Your presentation was excellent. I desire I learned a lot!” “It’s quite cold today but the weather report said that tomorrow is meant to be nice and sunny.” People tend to reply better to a positive comment instead of a negative one. It helps show that you simply are a pleasing one that pays attention to what’s happening. Staying positive also helps put others comfortable. As a result, people are going to be more curious about continuing a conversation with you.

Start Simple

Not every great conversation must begin with a deep, philosophical, earth-shattering observation. Simple icebreaker comments or questions are excellent thanks to the beginning.

Commenting on the weather, the room, or the food might sound cliche, but there's a reason why this type of icebreaker works so well. It’s an easy, easy thanks to getting a conversation rolling, offering a touch of footing between two strangers. Talking about inconsequential things can cause further conversations about personal preferences, backgrounds, hobbies, and deeper topics which will help forge social bonds between people.

What the Research Says

In one study published within the journal psychology, researchers performed naturalistic observations on participants to record both chitchat and deep conversations for several days.

What they found is that folks who engaged in deeper, personal conversations also had higher levels of happiness. This might mean that happy people are more likely to interact with others in meaningful conversations—but it also might mean that such substantive conversations may very well cause greater happiness. The researchers suggest that “the findings demonstrate that the happy life is social instead of solitary and conversationally deep instead of superficial.”

Not everyone loves making chitchat, but it is often a crucial initiative that will cause deeper, more meaningful conversations.

While starting a conversation often begins by that specialize in small, trivial things, research suggests that having more deep conversations could also be linked to greater happiness and well-being.

Learning the way to start a conversation can help lead you into these more consequential social connections.

Ask for Help

Asking an issue may be a good way to start a conversation. Doing this not only gives you a reason to interact with the opposite person—but it also allows them to be helpful.

When using this approach, start with something simple which will be accomplished without an excellent deal of effort. for instance, you would possibly ask someone if they know what time a workshop begins or directions to a specific location.

Conversation Starters

“Do you happen to understand where I could get a schedule?” “Have you seen an earring? I seem to possess lost one.” “Do you recognize if there'll be refreshments served after the workshop?” One of the advantages of this approach is that asking an easy question can cause further conversation about other topics. Once you've got posed your question and therefore the other person has offered their assistance, it creates something of a reciprocal agreement between you and your conversation partner.

Since they need offering their assistance, it's now up to you to offer your thanks and introduce yourself. this will function a chance for you to ask more about the opposite person—who they're, what brings them here, and other questions that are relevant given the setting and situation.

Body Language

Sometimes what you are doing say is simply as important as what you do say. As you strike up a replacement conversation, it's important to concentrate on your nonverbal communication.

Body language is often wont to convey interest and emotion. A friendly expression, comfortable stance, and good eye contact, for instance, can help show that you simply have a real interest in learning more about another person. Slouching, looking away, and frowning, on the opposite hand, might make your conversation partner feel that you simply are bored or disinterested.

Encouraging nonverbal signals include:

An open posture, which involves keeping the trunk of your body open together with your arms relaxed, helps convey a way of friendliness. Good eye contact involves watching a person’s eyes. Don’t stare, which may be threatening. Instead, keep things natural, watching the opposite person’s eyes but glancing away occasionally. Smiling is often helpful, as long because it seems genuine and natural. Avoid faking an enormous smile and check out to travel for a relaxed but uplifting expression.

Listen and Express Interest

It is often intimidating to undertake to speak to someone when it feels that you simply have little in common. In these situations, getting the opposite person to speak about his or her interests, work, or expertise is often useful thanks to starting a conversation.

Ask an issue about what the opposite person does, then specialize in really taking note of what they need to mention. People often enjoy talking about things they're hooked in to, so expressing a real interest in the things that people enjoy are often excellent fuel for an excellent conversation.

Strike a Balance

A good conversation doesn't believe only one approach.

The best discussions involve a mix of asking questions, taking note of what people need to say, and sharing things about yourself.

A simple conversation might start by:

Asking some basic information (“Did you enjoy the presentation?”) Listening to the solution (“It was great! I desire I learned a lot!”) Disclosing your thoughts (“I thought so also . I have already got some ideas about how I can incorporate those tips into my work process.”) Next, you would possibly repeat the method by asking another question, or your conversation partner might then prefer to ask an issue about your earlier response.) Learning the way to start a conversation is a crucial skill that will assist you to build social connections during a big variety of contexts. It is often difficult initially, particularly if you struggle with shyness or social anxiety, but gaining many practices is the key to become easier to lecture to people.

Try to consider all of those interactions as a rehearsal. The more often you initiate discussions with others, the stronger your conversational skills will become.

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