#you might be more motivated to take care of them 💕 and maybe they are going to grow healthier and stronger ✨

[prommethium]

There have been many experiments trying to figure out if plants have musical preferences or if they react to sounds. One of the best-known experiments was carried out by Charles Darwin, in which he monitored reactions of a Mimosa to his own bassoon playing. In the 1970s, The Sound of Music in Plants by Dorothy L. Retallack was published. This particular publication was the one that popularized the idea that plants have a musical preference and that they react to sounds. Dorothy L. was cited in The Secret Life of Plants by Tompkins and Bird, the latter publication being the best-known and most cited in the academic world. However, quoting a publication or repeating someone's words does not always lead to the truth.

Plants do react to sounds, but not in the way we imagine, in fact, they don't care about rock or classical music. Next, I'm going to explain why the previously cited experiments as well as the one in this post are not solid. If you do not want to read it but want to know the conclusion, you can find it at the end of the post in bold green.

// And who am I to be talking about this? I'm a biotech engineer, I've been studying plants for the last 2 years, currently working with seeds and hydroponic systems// Also, please forgive my potato English.//

Charles Darwin in his own autobiography cites that his experiment with Mimosa had no effect and was a waste of time. Dorothy's experiment, which by the way had the intention of discrediting rock music and validating or exalting classical music, was carried out on a small sample of plants, in which humidity was measured with her fingers, it was an experiment in which the type of substrate used was not indicated, in which the plants were in her own garden and the garden of a friend of hers.

All these experiments, including the one in this post, have something in common:

The number of samples is small.

The number of repetitions is also small.

There are no statistics.

The experimental design is poor.

The parameters are variable.

Hold and behold my friends, we are in the presence of pseudoscience 🔥

This particular experiment goes into detail about the selected plants and their needs in terms of soil, light, and water. But the details in the experiment itself are insufficient. There are no data regarding the volume of the music or the isolation conditions as well as the instruments used to measure and monitor the conditions of the plants. The authors explicitly state that their conditions were variable, and cite experiments in which plants died after being subjected to 3 hours of rock music (honestly LMAO, this study seems to be in controversy with another carried out by Peter Scott and published in Physiology and Behaviour of Plants in which he found that plants grow better when subjected to rock music. Peter also discovered that the growth patterns in his plants were altered not by sound but by the heat coming from the speakers.) The study in this post cites reliable sources, however, they have nothing in common with their experimental design and seem to be only there to try to gain validity just for the sake of mentioning them; also, please go and check them out, words as could and might, are common, and there is nothing conclusive in them.

The Real Sonic Effects

The first experiment that I am aware of was carried out by Monica Gagliano and Stefano Mancuso in 2012. They found that plant roots move in the direction where subsonic vibrations propagated by underground water come from.

Plants have been here long before us, it is presumptuous to assume that music or words of encouragement can make them grow better. What is the relevance of music for the evolution of plants? Plants have been on earth for 200 million years, and music, exactly how long?

If a plant reacts to a sonic effect it is most likely ecologically relevant such as pollinators, or water.

Monica Gagliano and Stefano Mancuso's experiment was questioned and not accepted as a "sound effect," because the waves were propagated over land and water. However, they continued along this line of study and in 2017 published another article Root phototropism.

The roots in a normal state grow downwards, but their roots lean towards 200Hz sonic waves (this time Gagliano and Mancuso made sure that the sound was traveling through air.)

We perceive sound through mechanical perception (sound waves hit some bones in our ears (malleus, incus, & stapes) which come into contact with nerve sensors, etc…), and in plants, it is no different. The sound has an effect on the concentrations of sodium and potassium ions, the sound increases the concentration of Ca2+, and this change acts as a chain effect causing the movement of the roots. I won't talk about genetics, but it is currently possible to determine which gene or which piece of DNA is activated under certain conditions (Thanks next generation sequencing 😭💖)

Chandra Mishra, Ritesh Ghosh, and Hanhong Bae studied the expression of the hearing genes by exploring what it was their favourite frequency, and they found a series of genes that were activated and/or repressed at different amplitudes of the sonic wave. It was incredible to discovered that these genes involved in sound perception were also the genes involved in tactile responses (The most famous tactile response can be seen in Mimosa.)

Conclusion.

Sound vibration leads to physical stimulation, plants' roots react to sonic waves of 200Hz (similar to the sound made by water,) making them bend towards the source of the sound.

The genes activated for this response are the same genes involved in mechanical responses such as touch, therefore for now we can conclude that sound has a mechanical effect in plants.

Sources.

Towards understanding plant bioacoustics

Root phonotropism: Early signalling events following sound perception in Arabidopsis roots

Plant acoustics: in the search of a sound mechanism for sound signaling in plants

Exposure to Sound Vibrations Lead to Transcriptomic, Proteomic and Hormonal Changes in Arabidopsis

there is a surprising amount of research on the effects of music on plant growth and I find this subtle diss of country music to be absolutely hilarious

[eclecticmiasma]

Hello! Good evening!

I haven’t been able to stop thinking about Mithrun and I had a small scenario pop up in my head, and it would be lovely to see your vision on how this would play out, please and thank you 💕:

AFAB!Elf!reader is a member of the canaries, very soft spoken and rather kind. The nicest, most likely. Against her better judgement she’s down bad for the captain and everyone else is like “pls no I’d rather you not”. (She can fix him/jk)

Mithrun realizes she has feelings for him and in a very subtle way treats her a little more gentle than the others. Lets her spoil him a tiny bit more. Listens to her a bit more.

Reader can only hope one day maybe…just maybe…the captain can show a little interest in her too 🥺 and is oblivious that he lets her get away with a little more than others

Just very soft feelings all over

I won't spoil it for those who haven't read the manga, but there are instances where we see Mithrun treat Kabru rather favorably and opening up in great detail about his past. In a side story, we also see that younger Mithrun cared for the other canaries quite a bit. I imagine that even without his desires, Mithrun would appreciate care shown to him in his own Mithrun-y way.

SFW

Mithrun might be adverse to you at first, because when he really looks inward you remind him of his younger self.

However, Mithrun would soon come to see that you don't have the same...pitfalls in your personality that brought him where he is today. He might even come to somewhat admire your ability to stay genuinely kind in a world like theirs.

The other canaries start to notice that you have a much easier time getting their leader to take an ounce of care in his own well-being than any of them ever have. Some of them think it's entertaining while others (Pattadol) think the favoritism is unnacceptable.

Cithis might tease him about it if you aren't around, "We don't want to worry poor [y/n] by getting all dehydrated now, do we captain?"

Even the mention of your name is enough to motivate Mithrun, though you remain completely unaware. In your mind, the captain regards you as nothing more than a subordinate.

You don't notice the way his good eye trains on you as you talk about life before the canaries. You don't realize how fast he falls asleep when you're near. The magnitude of the fact that one night he voluntarily tells you a story about when he and his brother were children slips by you completely.

Pattadol is the only one to ever bring it up to you directly, and you truly have no idea what she's talking about. None of the others help her either, preferring to sit back and watch how her face reddens with frustration.

Mithrun isn't oblivious to the situation, however. He knows that there's something about you that...calms him, at the very least. He's sharp enough to know that you feel the same way about him, perhaps even stronger.

He likes having you around. It's not something he wants when you're gone, but it's something he enjoys while you're there. Because he knows you have some type of feelings for him, he indulges you at every turn. He even lets you wash his back and massage the scarred tissue built at the tips of his ears- though you're terribly relieved he can't see the heat rising on your cheeks as you do so.

One day, long long after the dungeoneering is done, perhaps you might even be able to help Mithrun find his desires, find himself again.

*do not post elsewhere without explicit permission. please consider reblogging, as Tumblr tends to hide adult content!

[RULES] [MASTERLISTS] [AO3] [KO-FI]

[neutron-stars-collision]

Deadlines & Commitments

Neil x F!Reader

Chapter 6 - Canada Water Underground Station

Masterlist; Chapter 5 Summary: Neil shows you just how well he can take care of you. As the night at your place takes a turn, you both need to adjust to the slight change in the dynamic. Warnings: Explicit content, and I mean it; swearing; slight angst. Author's Notes: Okay, so I'm a day earlier than I thought but since barely anyone reads this anyway... *shrugs* might as well. This is 10+k of smut and then another 3k of mental spiralling (thanks to Duran Duran), to make things more entertaining :)) It's been a while since I wrote scenes like this and it proved to be a challenge but I do hope I delivered. One thing is certain - these two definitely were into whatever I envisioned in my daydreams ✨ Without further ado, I'm leaving you with another 14k of words. The motivation for this story fluctuates like crazy but for now, more is coming. Hope you enjoy and let me know what you think? 💕 Taglist: @hollandorks, @kristevstewart, @stargirl25 (let me know if you want to be added)

Although it was far from the very first time you had a gorgeous man kneel before you with a promising smile on his face and a determination to cure your ails through the sheer force of a good orgasm, it might have been the most memorable one.

If only just because of Neil’s eyes, staring into the depths of your soul as he carefully took off your underwear, simultaneously laying kisses on the expanse of your calves, knees, and thighs. In some shades of the light, you would swear his eyes were twinkling.

At first, you wanted to look away, hoping it would help your case. Make it seem less meaningful in this unspecified way that you could not and would not dissect for months. Soon, you found that you simply could not look away. Instead, you looked on, letting his tender caress arrest your senses and instantly put you back within that fuzzy space of mind. Once he took off your panties, Neil glanced up to meet your gaze, that dangerous smile still hiding in the corners of his mouth. His hands continued the journey, pulling up the dress for easier access, all the while driving you another step closer to madness with perfectly laid kisses, burning the tender skin of your inner thighs. Before you could even think of anything to say, he broke the heavy silence:

“You’re beautiful,” the certainty in his voice, as if stating a fact not unlike the existence of the forces of gravity, made you feel lightheaded.

Sure, it was something you had heard before. Maybe even often. But that didn’t mean you believed it. The notion scratched at the edges of your insecurities, never quite managing to scrape them away. Usually, it fell way off.

“See, I don’t know if I should take that seriously” stumbling through the sentence with a breathless voice, you subtly shifted your hips on the sofa and pointedly glanced down at Neil with what you hoped was ferocity, “Considering what you’re about to do to me,”

From his vantage point, with his hands pinning your thighs to the couch, legs wide open with everything on display, the point was more than evident. You could tell Neil caught it with how that light pink spread over his cheeks again, painting a fascinating contrast.

“You should,” drawing mindless circles on your kneecap as if to buy his time, Neil added, “I’ve thought it since I first saw you. It just didn’t seem the right thing to say back then” he shrugged, daring to put forward another mind-blowing concept.

Another fact undeniable only to him. As if desperate to make talking even harder for you, Neil took the pause as his chance to drop his gaze from that respectable position, wandering over your face to stare at the apex of your thighs with nothing but hunger in his eyes. You swallowed hard, feeling the arousal spread through your veins like wildfire.

“And now?” the question was all you could manage, driven by the remains of sanity that considered this answer essential.

As if it would change anything at all.

“Now I’m hopefully going to make you feel really good, so… There aren’t many lines left to cross” Neil glanced up at you again, that same confident smile acting as both a warning and an enticement, luring you in.

As if aware of your increasingly muddled state, he let go of your knee to squeeze your hand and grinned. There was nothing more you felt capable of saying. Or doing, except to drop your head back on the sofa headrest and let Neil do whatever the fuck he wanted.

Which was to trace an invisible line up the expanse of your right leg to that place between your thighs, that was already drenched because of him. Even that ghostly touch burned your skin as Neil carefully parted your folds with the tip of his index finger and dragged it through the slick. Muffling a groan by forcefully biting your lower lip, you closed your eyes. You were already on fire.

“Is this all for me?” the wonder in his voice, combined with just enough smugness to make you consider punching Neil in the face, was another reason to drown in the embarrassment.

Although, drowning in need was a close second with how Neil slowly mapped out his terrain, spreading the wetness over your slit and around the entrance. Preparing you for what he had in mind.

Before you knew what you were doing, your hand had found its way to the nape of his neck, lightly playing with the hair ends and pressing against the warm skin. The contact acted like an anchor, assuring you of the realness of the situation.

“Yeah, but don’t get too cocky about it,” the end of what you hoped to be a warning never quite landed as it was immediately followed by a gasp.

A consequence of the fact that Neil decided to use that exact moment to delve in. His warm breath fanned across your bare skin as he settled between your thighs with a simple comment:

“I’ll do my best” the tail end of the quip was followed by the first experimental lick through your folds, the tongue lightly dragging through the sensitive skin.

You choked on a curse, fingers of the occupied hand already tangling in his blonde locks. Your other hand gripped the sofa edge hard enough that you worried it would leave indents in the material.

Neil took that sound as a cue, repeating the move till you could barely stay still. Keeping your hips pinned to the couch with one arm slung across your thighs, he swirled his tongue over your heat, collecting the arousal as if he was dying of thirst. Just when you thought he would offer respite, he dragged the tip of his tongue up towards your clit and focused the attention on the spot that had you crying out loud.

It was easy to let go then. To keep your eyes closed when Neil’s thoughtful manoeuvres and skilled tongue attacked your senses with an intensity that soon made it impossible to think or speak. Resorted to incoherent mumblings and moans, you tugged at Neil’s hair with force, making him groan. The sound went straight to your core, shooting like a live wire through your body and making you tense up. He was good at this. Not that you ever doubted he would be. He listened and used the cues available to go where you needed him, interchanging between lapping at your heat and sucking your clit. Like a scholar dedicated to his study. Like a devoted believer praying at the altar of his God.

Or goddess, apparently.

You could feel the knot in your lower stomach tighten, that wave of pleasure getting close to unbearable with every second. An attempt at speech only got you as far as a breathless admission, interrupting the silence filled with nothing but your shameless screams:

“I’m so close” it was merely a fact, something he could discern from the force of your grip over his hair or the way you quivered, barely able to keep yourself together, “Neil, please just-”

You did not even know what you were asking for. Something. Anything.

He knew anyway. You felt a comforting touch, a careful hand tracing invisible circles on the skin of your outer thigh as Neil took a break to glance up. Your eyes snapped open at the interruption, meeting his gaze as if following a sense you had no label for.

Much later, you would wonder whether that, the connection so alike the first time your eyes met over the carriage floor, could be something different than a trick of light. Something substantial. Something terrifying.

But, back then, you could only stare back. Vulnerable and at his mercy, yet not scared of the prospect. As if able to read your mind or the incoherent ramblings resembling scatterings of thoughts, Neil shot you a grin. His lips and chin were glistening, coated with your slick. The sight was enough to make you clench around nothing and shudder. Your body wound tight still.

Whatever Neil saw in that moment of silence must have been what he was searching for. Your eyelids fell close when you felt him dive in again, the talented lips enveloping your heat without a second wasted.

Before you could as much as let yourself immerse in the steady rise of pleasure, in the exact feel of his mouth at the most sacred of places you could offer, he took it that one step further. Delivering the deathly stroke with the tip of his tongue, prodding at your entrance, and penetrating it without mercy. It was too late to try muffling the cry torn out of your throat without warning. Christ. You could only attempt not to rip the hair from his head as you tugged at the blonde locks and tried to get him closer. Tried to do what you always did and take what you wanted.

But Neil would not let you, his grip unyielding over your hips, keeping you pinned to the sofa. Keeping you spread out and helpless as he dragged you over the precipice with the tenderness of his touch and the determination of a man desperate to do well. Desperate to serve.

“Oh, fuck,” the curse carried on a moan in that last flash of coherence before the edges of your vision darkened, and your spine rose in an arch, unable to hold still anymore, “I’m-” the thought, whatever it was meant to be, was never finished.

Instead, it got replaced with a litany of his name, whispered with the tint of ecstasy, colouring the vowels and consonants. As if you had nothing else to say. No one else to praise. Just Neil. The wave of pleasure crashed into you without subtlety, its force rendering you numb as you quivered beneath his tongue and under his firm hands. Neil held you as you shook, licking you clean as if he did not want to lose the taste of you from his tongue for hours to come.

When the orgasm started fading, and you felt your body relax again, falling limp against the cushions, you opened your eyes. The hazy vision blurred the edges of your living room, making it seem soft and pliant. Unreal. With a quiet sigh, you glanced down just in time to see Neil raise his head and meet your gaze.

He painted a picture, as always. The blonde strands fell into his eyes, and the sharp cheekbones bathed in pink blush as his lips curled into a smirk. That sudden spike of desire to grab his tie and pull him into a kiss, to learn what your taste feels like on his tongue, was hard to fight against. It made you curl your hand into a fist, focusing on the shade of blue in his eyes. Until you could take another breath. Until your heart rate slowed down. Until everything felt real.

Until you knew what was happening next.

As if aware of the internal crisis, Neil stayed quiet. He observed you with almost unnerving stillness before seemingly finding what he was looking for and letting your legs close with a final kiss on the kneecap. He propped his chin on your thigh, almost resembling a perverse image of a lapdog that you had no idea you were into before now. Curious.

“Everything alright?” the huskiness of his voice swept over your senses like a chilling breeze, waking you up from a trance.

What a silly question. As a preamble to an answer, you shot Neil a wide grin, aware of the madness still clearly visible in your eyes. It hardly mattered.

“Even better” dragging your fingers through his golden mane, you relished in the slight tremble of his hands as Neil settled them atop your thighs. Now it was time to give praise where it was due, “I always knew you’d be good at this, but… fuck’s sake,” that was as far as intelligence went, replaced with a groan that doubled as a dreamy sigh.

It still barely covered what you wanted it to. But Neil knew. It was visible in the pleased smile and the knowing glance thrown your way from his spot at your feet. Almost lazily, his tongue darted out to lick his lips clean of your arousal. Without breaking the eye contact. Of course.

You could hardly ignore the fact that you were wet again. Still, that is.

“I aim to serve, m’lady” squeezing your thigh, Neil got up from his knees to sit by you on the sofa.

He stayed close, and that proximity, complete with the undiminished hunger in his eyes, told you all you needed to know. A push in the right direction.

“Yeah, you do” offering Neil a sly smirk, you shifted so that you were facing him and reached out to grab his tie and pull him close. Just like God intended. Probably, “Come here, I need to-” that sentence had no end prepared, so you sealed it with a kiss.

Your lips covered Neil’s with a self-explanatory intent as your tongue teased and prodded until he opened his mouth and let you in. That first taste of yourself coating his tongue was a revelation. It made you groan, motivating you to rise on your knees and climb into his lap without breaking the kiss. That second of hesitation following the bold move was eradicated when Neil pulled you closer with his hands on your waist. He kissed you as if his life depended upon it, swirling his tongue around yours and mapping out the inside of your mouth. A rush of blood to your head was the reason why you decided to switch it up, lightly scraping your teeth over his bottom lip and pulling until you got a response. The answering growl, reverberating through his chest, ignited the sparks burning out in your blood. Now you knew what you needed to happen. The realisation made you pull back with a final peck upon his parted lips and open your eyes.

Neil’s wrecked gaze felt like a boost to the system, increasing your confidence. It was a reason why you comfortably settled in his lap and regarded him with quiet contemplation. Returning the earlier look.

You tried not to dwell on how different it felt, unhurried and deliberate like none of your previous hook-ups. How uncomplicated it all seemed, with Neil’s steady gaze and firm hands holding you still. How unavoidable you had deemed it to be a long time before. You tried and failed, burying the thoughts behind a wall of sensations and feelings. You hoped they would never resurface again. Somehow.

“Good?” Neil’s question made you start, instantly pulling you back from the abyss in your head.

The surprise must have shown on your face, for Neil followed the question by brushing his nose against yours, tenderness permeating every glance and gesture.

It was almost too much.

“Great” aware of the shakiness of your smile, you splayed your hand over the expanse of his chest, feeling the heartbeat.

It was both a distraction and searching for confirmation. A confirmation that you were not about to make an idiot out of yourself.

The rapid beat beneath your hand erased the doubts, helping you make that decisive move. Meeting Neil’s questioning gaze, you smiled. The edge of your grin turned sharp at the mere thought. Before he could catch the meaning, you got up from the sofa and reached out a hand towards Neil. Extending an invitation.

You could see the quick calculations behind his stare, the blue eyes switching between your extended hand and the enigmatic expression. Although the silence felt eternal, it only lasted a beat. Without another word, Neil took your hand, enlaced your fingers in a loose hold, and stood up from the couch. The certainty in his gaze made it easy to start leading him towards the room down the corridor. The room he has already seen, albeit not in this context.

At the doorway, you let go of him to turn on the lamp in the corner, bathing the room in a warm glow. Neil crossed the threshold, following you like a ghost. You did not need to tell him to shut the door till only a small gap remained. Or to meet you halfway across the room and pull you back into his embrace like you belonged there.

And tonight, it felt like you did.

One giddy kiss quickly turned into the next and then another after that. Until you were both gasping for breath, needy hands tugging and sliding across the pieces of clothing that were in the way. It was then, midway through an inhale you desperately needed, that you realised there was one crucial thing left to settle. One question that you owed Neil:

“Before I make a fool of myself… Do you want this?” settling your hands on his shoulders, you met Neil’s gaze with what you hoped was a coherent enough look.

You could tell the question surprised him from the way his eyes widened, hands wrinkling your dress over the hips with a tight grip. But the pause only lasted a second.

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t” the confidence was striking, almost fatal in how well it fit his beautiful face. The angles softened by the warm light, and the smugness still felt lethal, threatening to cut you open if you kept on being reckless. You pushed the warning to the back of your head, focusing on the look in Neil’s eyes, “I want you. So much it drives me crazy” the admission completed the desire in his gaze.

Its simplicity drove a shiver up your spine and bloomed heat on your cheeks. While it was nothing you have not anticipated, hearing it said so plainly drove the point home. It offered no space to bargain for insecurities and doubts. As much as you still did not know the expiration date on this precious, lovely thing between you, now you knew where it was going. You knew the drill. The logic of it. Need, want, desire. Yearning to have another person, claim them as your own, just for one night. Just until you felt whole again. One night should be enough.

Right?

Instead of addressing that thought, you smoothed out the creases in Neil’s tie and met his gaze with indifference. (At least outwardly).

“Fab. I’m glad we got that sorted” giving the Windsor knot a final pat, you shot Neil a smile.

Slowly, with his grounding touch running over the sides and down to your hips, you could feel the temperature rise again. The increase was steady, not yet overwhelming like before on the sofa, but it was very much there. It made your gaze wander, trailing down the column of his neck, begging to be kissed and bitten, to the expanse of his chest, still hidden by the frustrating layers of cotton and linen. You desperately wanted to get your hands on him. Properly.

“Do you?” the question caught you by surprise, making you look up to see Neil’s searching gaze.

Your brain muddled with want, needed another second to understand what he meant. Only then disbelief took the stage, with the bewilderment in your eyes. What kind of stupid question was that?

“Obviously. I’ve only been eye-fucking you for months” that was an understatement.

But it hit the mark, with a hitch in his chest and a subtle move of hands on your hips pulling you a fraction closer. Enough so there was barely space left between your bodies, and you could just about feel the effects of your words and actions on Neil. At least the physical side of them. A glance down, below his belt, confirmed the suspicions and made you grin like a wolf that has just spotted its prey for the night.

“Have you now?” the hints of amusement in his voice, still somehow mixed with uncertainty, were enough to put the need aside for one second and meet Neil’s gaze with confidence.

The apprehension, when it came to how you saw him, had no place here. Not when each time you laid your eyes on him, you only found more reasons to be captivated. Not when Neil tended to be the only one you could see when you were together. When he haunted your dreams with beauty and pleasure. No, that wouldn’t do.

Covering his hands with yours, you stood on the tiptoes to kiss him on the forehead. Leaning in, you whispered a simple admission:

“Yes, Neil” you hoped he could tell there was more behind those two words. That he could see the depths of admiration you had never possessed for another person, save for him. That he knew how much you meant every tender compliment and careful touch. It was the most you could offer. The furthest line you would cross. It was high time to return to the crux of the conversation. You did so with a bat of the eyelashes and a smirk on your face, “And now I want you to fuck me. Is that clear?”

Admittedly, the whiplash you served Neil was quite something. He took it with a few seconds of hesitation, a lack of comprehension flashing through his eyes in something resembling the 500 error screen. You fought the urge to burst out in ridiculous giggles. Then, as if his brain finally caught up with your words, Neil blinked. Once, then twice. Blue eyes flashing with inklings of understanding. It was fascinating to watch. To notice the different shades of his iris and then the exact second when yearning replaced the previous confusion and took up reigns.

“Yes, m’am” grinning wide, Neil mimicked a lazy salute and took a decisive step forward, pushing you towards the bed with newly minted drive.

You sure did not mind the initiative, letting him steer you in the right direction until you felt the edge of the mattress hit the backs of your legs. A sudden strike of inspiration made you use the years of ballet and turn on your toes, pivoting you both to reverse the positions. His quiet gasp was an indication that you succeeded. Without another word, you pushed him down to sit on the bed, meeting the bewildered gaze with a grin. It was high time he got used to it.

When you had him where you wanted – seated below you with a gaze full of awe and parted lips, you whispered the only praise that came to mind:

“Good boy,” the effect was instant.

A swallowed groan, complete with an eye roll that was still somehow fond. Before you could react, tease him further, Neil reached out to grab onto your hips and pulled you down, throwing you off balance. There was no point in resisting gravity as you tumbled down onto the mattress with a whoosh and found yourself in his arms. Again. His hands wandered over your body in broad strokes, igniting the fire as you closed the distance and captured his mouth in a kiss.

One kiss stretched into another and one more still, spanning minutes and seconds until you were both gasping for oxygen. Until all you could taste was Neil, and all you could feel was his touch. Between one sharp inhale and the next, you placed a kiss on the edge of his mouth and started trailing pecks down the column of his neck, making Neil shiver and moan. Each kiss was sealed with the tiniest bite, barely reddening the tender skin and a reconciliatory lick so you could satiate the desire with his taste. Just a little bit.

His exploring hands crept beneath the hem of your dress again, pulling up the fabric and creating goosebumps on your thighs. There was no guessing what it meant. Ending your intensive study with a lingering bite over his pulse point, marking him for everyone to see, you leaned back far enough to meet Neil’s gaze. You offered him a subtle nod and sat up, twisting so he could see the zipper running down your spine. The message was clear. He caught it with a knowing smirk, lightly brushing away the hair falling over the nape of your neck. The tremble in the wake of his touch had to be disguised with a sigh.

Even now, Neil was gentle. One of his hands settled on the back of your neck, stroking the delicate skin with unnecessary care, while the other tugged at the zipper, slowly undressing you. That first hit of colder air in the apartment was a shock to the system, making you inhale sharply. The sound alerted Neil. His hand skirted down your spine to warm up your skin revealed beneath the dress. Now, you could not do anything about the shivers rocking through your body in an embarrassing display. Before you could even attempt to fill the silence with another dose of bullshit, Neil pulled the zipper all the way down to the base of your spine and slipped his hand inside the dress. The warmth of his palm against your bare stomach felt like a burning flare, putting your soul alight. Sucking in the air sharply, you pressed your back to his chest, seeking out more.

The intimacy of the moment could not escape your attention. The slow pace and conscious decisions to get to know each other first were something new. Something unheard of as far as your hook-ups went. There was no rush in tearing off the clothes and getting off as far as possible to avoid the thoughts catching up. Instead, there was Neil’s hand against your midriff and his mouth against the back of your neck, gently biting the sensitive skin and making it impossible for you to detach from the present moment. Not that you wanted to.

When he deemed it right, Neil leaned back and slipped the dress off your shoulders. A sudden uncertainty took root in your heart, like a bad seed eager to corrupt the rest of the crops. What was about to happen seemed substantial somehow. Despite the improbable nature of the idea that Neil could take one look at you naked and decide that you were not worth his time, the concept was still there. It replaced the previous bravado, making you exhale shakily before standing up and turning towards him, holding up the article of clothing to keep it from falling.

You knew there was no point in fooling yourself that Neil did not catch on to your hesitation. Not with the way he always saw right through whatever posturing you tried to attempt. You met his gaze, aware of the extent of damage to the reputation it would do. All you found looking back at you was his silent reassurance, trying to keep you anchored. Inhale. Exhale.

Before your brain could become a little bitch again, you relaxed the hold over the fabric, letting it fall to the floor. You had nothing to hide behind, having left the bra back in the dressing room and your underwear on the floor of the living room. The chill in the air made you tremble, barely resisting the urge to cover up.

Neil’s gaze remained steady as he took you in. His eyes roamed over your body, noting the curves and edges, imperfections, and flaws. That fear was still there, making you tighten your hands into fists. Neil closed the gap, taking both your palms into his and relaxing the muscles. Taking a deeper breath, you risked meeting his eyes. The blue depths lured you in, showing nothing but affection and infatuation. For reasons unknown, the look felt dangerous in way you could not describe. So, you stared back, ignoring the desire to fill the stifling silence with words that could not be taken back.

As always, Neil proved to be the braver one.

“Are you alright?” his soothing tone complemented the gentle touch of his hands running up your bare arms to rest over your shoulders.

Even now, Neil proved to be shockingly respectful. His eyes never strayed from yours and although he had all rights to touch you as he pleased - he did not. Something in his gaze told you this was a given for Neil. A rule he would never even consider crossing. The realisation helped you find your voice again.

“Always,” the wavering tone did nothing to create an illusion of nonchalance.

But then, it was too little too late, anyway.

Upon Neil’s searching gaze, you nodded. It must have been what he was looking for because the next thing you knew, he was placing a lingering kiss on your lips and letting his hands wander. At first, tentatively down the centre of your chest and over the heart, beating so fast you would swear even Neil could hear it pounding in the silence. Then, he got braver, palms cupping your breasts and tracing the pink areolas, making you gasp and tense. If his hand delved between your thighs, you knew he would find you dripping wet.

But he didn’t. Instead, Neil mapped out the constellations of freckles and beauty marks over your chest and stomach while massaging your breasts and stoking the fire burning underneath your skin.  When he first tweaked your nipple, the resulting moan made you clamp your mouth shut with your hand and stare at him in silent horror. There was no room for aloofness and detachment here. No space to pretend you were not bothered. And that was terrifying.

Yet, the most terrifying moment came a little later when Neil had you spread out beneath him on the bed. He was still wearing clothes, and it was a fact that would have caused much more annoyance had he not just finished leaving marks over your chest, kissing, and biting all the sensitive spots. Your panting mouth was still parted on a gasp when Neil released your nipple with a wet pop and moved back up to meet your gaze. Like this, with his cheeks permanently coloured pink and lips red from the kisses you did not seem able to stop trading, he was exceptionally breath-taking. Your chest heaved as you attempted to formulate any words, but before you could succeed, Neil broke the silence:

“You’re beautiful” it was an echo from maybe an hour before, uttered with even more reverence.

The effect was strengthened by the look in his eyes, roaming over your face with something akin to worship.

Worship you were not worthy of. Never. And especially not by Neil, who, without a shadow of a doubt, deserved better. The thought was not anything new, yet it acted like a bucket of ice-cold water, wiping off the dreamy haze you had settled into. Oh, so stupidly.

Suddenly, the rightness of it all seemed wrong. Skewed in a direction you did not dare ponder. Because yes, Neil was the right one, the one you desperately needed to have. Even if just once. But not like this. Not with all those feelings and monumental thoughts that strayed too far from the comfort zone. No, you had to act. Had to remind both Neil and yourself what was going on here. Who you were supposed to be.

Swallowing past the inexplicable lump in your throat, you sat up and pushed Neil up with your hands around his neck. It was much easier to breathe like this, no longer entirely at his mercy. With his blue eyes peering at you with curiosity, you settled your hands on the buttons of his vest and smirked:

“You’re wearing too many clothes,” now that sounded more like you.

It was a perfect opener, instantly eliciting a reaction in the form of widened eyes and parted lips. Neil stared at you for something close to thirty seconds, which proved that it was the last thing he expected you to say. But then, just as you dared undo the first button of his vest, he grinned. That wolfish smile which haunted your sleepless nights flashed at you with an edge of something dangerous hidden beneath. Something you wanted to discover.

“Then do something about it, Cupid” Neil shot you a wink and leaned back on his elbows to strengthen the point.

The point that you were allowed to do whatever you wanted to him. There was no need to say it twice. You undid the rest of the buttons on his vest, pushing the garment down his shoulders and letting Neil shrug it off till the garment landed on the floor. It had served its purpose. Definitely.

Loosening up the tie was the easy part, and as you took it off over his head, you paused with the burgundy accessory in hand. The second of hesitation did not go unnoticed.

“What’s up?” Neil’s cautious tone made you grin as you looked up to see him peer at you with curiosity and alarm in equal proportions.

Wrapping the tie around your fist to keep the accessory as a needed prop dressing in the scene, you shrugged:

“Nothing. I’m just thinking about the different ways I could use this on you” the twinkle in your gaze was unmistakable for what it suggested.

There sure were ideas. Tones of them, and one better than the other. Images like wrists bound together with the tie or the burgundy fabric used as a blindfold were only a start of what you could concoct at the spur of the moment. The ideas alone made you shiver with anticipation.

Even more so when you saw Neil’s blank gaze, staring at the very topic of the conversation with something that could only be described as revelation. It dawned slowly as his pupils dilated, and the darkness consumed the blue irises. Licking his lips thoroughly as if already feeling the effects of what was about to happen, Neil raised his head and met your gaze.

“Now?” he sounded breathless, tongue stumbling even over a one-word question.

You buried the wave of affection under a dry chuckle, focusing on unbuttoning his shirt with single-minded focus. The tortoiseshell buttons necessitated a certain degree of patience, which you were not sure you possessed. And least of all right now. But, considering that the alternative was doing something stupid like ripping it off him, you did your best. The expletives still came, even if only in the quiet of your mind.

“Next time” once you were halfway done, you looked up and winked.

Was it too much? Probably. It assumed a course of events that you had no right to dump on Neil. Let alone like this. As if it was a given. But hopes were there, traitorously scheming in the unconscious layers of your psyche. Faint wishes that maybe you could have more than a one-night special.

Before you could dwell on the probability of thoughts like these, you broke eye contact again and glanced at your work in progress. With just a couple of buttons left, you could see the perfect canvas - pale and almost unblemished. You rushed through the remaining steps and pushed the shirt down his arms until he took over the task with a smirk and shrugged it off. You did not wait to look where the shirt had fallen as your eyes took in the picture.

He was beautiful in that perfectly imperfect way that tended to catch you unaware. His broad chest narrowed at the waist, presenting just the right amount of musculature. Strong arms drew you like a magnet, and you did not hesitate before letting your hand dart out to skim over his biceps and down the planes of his chest to touch the firm muscles. Neil was watching you intently. His gaze followed your every move as you slowly took him in. Noticing the scattering of beauty marks along the inside of his right arm and the dark, coarse hair covering his torso. Pressing your hand against the centre of his chest, you felt the beat of his heart and the heat of his skin. A strange sense of completion settled in your chest, making the heat bloom on your cheeks. That never happened before, either.

Before you could spiral over that singular, alarming thought, Neil covered your hand with his and asked:

“Better than the picture?” although the smug smile graced his features, you could sense hesitancy underlining the question.

A fear that you were about to laugh at him or ridicule his looks. As if he wasn’t the most incredible person you’ve seen. As if you were not rendered speechless.

There was no other way to approach it than by acting. Fast.

You glared at him with what you hoped promised no bullshit to be accepted and pushed at his chest till Neil was sprawled on your bed with his head propped on the headboard. He painted a beautiful picture. The only flaw was the infuriating presence of pants, but that had to wait. Just a little longer.

When you had him where needed, you straddled his lap and met his slightly bewildered gaze with a confident smile.

“Definitely,” you nodded, strengthening the statement with a careful touch as your fingers stroked his torso, wandering down till you could lay your palm flat against his abdomen. The trail of darker hair disappearing under the belt acted like a magnet, and you did not even try resisting the pull, “You’re fucking stunning,” sealing the compliment with a kiss was just a formality.

Yet the way Neil leaned into it, kissing you back with the ferocity of that first time on the platform, made your head spin. Somewhere, at the edge of consciousness not presently occupied with the taste of his tongue and the exact way his mouth pressed against yours, you could not ignore the obvious. The fact that it was never like this. No one-night-stand ever felt this deliberate and measured in a way that still incited a fire in your stomach and hunger in your blood. There was something different in how you kissed and let things slowly build up to sex rather than just rushing through every step along the way.

It all led to another thought, a faint realisation that you might have already subconsciously decided that one time with him would not be enough. Even before getting to know what it was like. That thought was not as terrifying as you expect it to be. Still, you ignored it, placing it among the towering piles of things not spoken or thought of until the end of time itself.

The piles were beginning to topple. One by one.

Neil broke the kiss with a telling gasp, shifting beneath you and bumping his hips into yours, drawing your attention back where it belonged. Namely to the darkness of his eyes and the visible bulge below the belt. Your hands almost automatically wandered to the belt buckle, but before you could put them to work, his breathless attempt at speech made you stop:

“I’m not-” you did not need to hear the sentence to understand it.

It was there in the uncertainty of his gaze and the bashful blush on his cheeks. How he still chose to stare at the bedcover instead of you, even when you were in his lap, free to be ogled for all he liked.

It was increasingly clear that Neil was not like that. That he was not like anyone you had ever known.

Ignoring that primal desire to undo his belt right this very instant, you abandoned the task and cupped his face between both hands, forcing Neil to meet your gaze.

“You are. Trust me,” there was no need to make those words sound convincing, for you believed it more than you knew how to express.

You stared as Neil seemingly tried to take it in. His eyes roamed over your features with scrutiny for a beat. He must not have found anything amiss because the next thing you knew, Neil was breaking into a smile and pulling you back into his arms.

Things went a little easier after that when you could fall upon familiar sensations and actions to push you in the right direction. Sure, there still were a couple of hung-ups, like that embarrassingly long pause you stumbled into once you had successfully taken off Neil’s trousers and underwear and could compare imagination to reality. Your imagination fell short. Somehow. Because, as you probably should have expected, Neil had no reason to compensate for anything. In the slightest.

At first, your undivided attention made Neil fall quiet, with the bashfulness threatening to replace the tentative confidence you were beginning to enjoy about him. But that changed when you shook off the hitch and let your hands explore. Your fingers traced the veins on his length as your palm started stroking him with confident twists in the wrist. Then Neil was not able to stay quiet any longer. He groaned, the sound reverberating through his chest as he laid next to you on the bed. Something in his gaze made it impossible to look away as you stroked and touched him, listening to the cues so earnestly provided. Soon enough, you knew what he liked, what moves elicited the moans that shot right to your core, making you squeeze the thighs hard in pointless hopes that it would do something to ease the throbbing want. It didn’t do shit.

As if reading your mind (or simply seeing the need written all over your face), Neil batted your courageous hands away with a pained glare that told you all you needed to understand and allowed his palms to wander. The hand that was previously placed on your hip slid down your naked skin. The places he touched felt like they were on fire, and the sensation grew when you felt his elegant hand delve between your legs again with confidence. Unbeknownst to Neil, that – his beautiful and mouth-wateringly long fingers moving between your thighs and between your folds – was a frequently-featured hit in your nightly fantasies. The reality lived up and surpassed the imagination in this case, too.

A wolfish grin you noticed too late did not warn you of what was coming. Neil wasted no time. His right hand instantly darted to your clit to circle the bud with precision and speed that matched the level of your fever. With him, you found no need to fill the silence with pointless words, instead letting yourself gasp and moan as he met your gaze with a smirk on his face and dipped a finger inside. There was no need to question the wetness he must have found, yet you noted a surprise pass through his face as if that was somehow unexpected. But you had no time to dwell on the thought. That delicious stretch as Neil added the second finger to your entrance wiped all coherence from your head. A loud moan tore at your throat as you shivered, finally feeling something take care of the emptiness at your core. But it wasn’t enough. It wouldn’t be till you had him.

His fingers quickly build up a rhythm, with the thumb pressing at your clit just right. Your hands, which had previously idly rested on his chest, ventured up to grasp at his shoulders, looking for support as the pressure rose with overwhelming pace. You were aware of the red lines you were scratching on his back and the pathetic moans and half-swallowed curses that permeated the silence. But you were unable to do anything about them. Not with how Neil knew exactly what to do to make you come. Again.

That lethal strike came when you felt a third digit delve inside. It joined the other two, keeping up the pace and making you scream with pleasure. The perfect fulness could only be replaced with one thing. One sensation that would go beyond it. It was a thought that pushed you over the edge, making you rake your fingers through his skin and squeeze your eyes shut against the force of the orgasm. Only once you felt like you could breathe again, lying lifelessly on the bedding, you opened your eyes again. The smug smile on Neil’s face confirmed one thing – he knew what he was doing. You were but a mere puppet in his hands.

A very willing puppet, one might add.

When you recovered the senses and coherence enough to speak, you met Neil’s gaze and stated:

“I’d like you to fuck me” there was no need to hide behind metaphors and euphemisms when saying it out loud was merely a formality.

Everything before led to it, after all. Every touch, glance, and flirtatious exchange that with Neil was almost too easy. It was what you always wanted, right from that first conversation and the dawning understanding that Neil was too incredible to forget. It was not an accident that ever since meeting him, you had close to no desire to have sex with anyone else, no pull to score another hookup in the bathroom of a club or the apartment of yet another random guy.

No, what you wanted (who you wanted) was Neil.

What you saw in his eyes, looking back at you through the narrow space between your heads, told you that he got the message. The yearning you often thought you saw in his gaze was present now. Along with want that dripped from his hands as they touched your body, tenderly yet with purpose. Neil stared at you as if he never wanted to look away and could not be convinced to. Like you were the only thing he desired. Or at least, you hoped it was like that for him. Too.

“Are you sure?” the pre-emptive question would have been silly was it not so damn endearing coming from him.

It coexisted with his hands skating over every inch of your skin within his reach and his hardening length pressing against your thigh. You had no choice but to offer him a smirk and cup his face to soften the tone. Just a notch.

“Very,” sealing the response with a kiss, you moved closer across the minimal space so that no gap between you remained.

It was easy to hitch your thigh over his hip and take him in your hand to guide him inside. It was easier still to break the kiss with a gasp once you felt him enter you. The sound mixed with his choked breath, sharp and sudden as if even though it was expected, Neil was not quite ready. His hand tangled in the hair at the back of your head, gently holding you close. The other was splayed over your waist, helping to find that perfect angle. He slowly inched inside, taking his time to bottom out, for which you were more than grateful. The pace helped you get accustomed to the feeling of fullness, almost painful yet not at all. The slight discomfort was the wake-up call you needed, a sensation so familiar that you could rely upon it to find your footing. To ignore the feelings and inconvenient thoughts for the sake of this, right here.

It helped you adjust the position, placing your hands on his shoulders for leverage and meet his gaze. A moan upon the feeling of him inside you, filling you perfectly, was muffled with a kiss he incited. It deepened as you opened your mouth for Neil and shifted so that your pelvises were touching. The move made him break the kiss with a telling groan, expressing exactly how it felt. He occupied all your senses, making it impossible to think or do anything but stare back at his beautiful face, now transformed by pleasure.

That first moment, the first sensation of connection when you slept with someone new, often hit like a drug. A dopamine hit, going straight to your brain. A rare sense of completion, especially sweet after months or weeks of pining for someone. It was like that now, too. The sensation of his naked skin touching yours, the heat of his body burning at your cells, and the strange knowledge that at least for the moment, you were one. Bodies and souls joined for one common purpose. Chasing that spectacular high that you knew was in reach now. Only then did you not feel like you were missing something crucial that you would never attain.

“All good?” your silence must have been alarming, for Neil’s question had a tint of concern underlining it.

Only that made you realise he was still as if frozen by uncertainty and afraid to mess it all up somehow. As if that was possible.

That had to be amended instantly.

“Yes,” offering him a slightly manic grin perfected by insanity in your gaze and tender touch ghosting over his beating heart, you added, “You can move now,”

Neil did not need to be told twice. He took your hand in his and started the slow tempo, thrusting with something you could easily mistake for gentleness. Softness you were not used to crashed against the walls built around your guarded heart. For now, they were too weak to cause damage. Thank God.

Tightening the hold over his palm, you raised your joined hands over your heads, looking for something to hold on to. Your other hand found purchase on his shoulder, digging in your fingernails as the pressure rose. The unhurried rhythm made the pleasure fill your veins in slow, consistent waves. You could feel it build up again as your inner muscles contracted, eliciting moans and curses from Neil. Once you knew how to meet him in the middle, you bucked your hips in response, earning a groan that shot straight to your molten core. The sound and the gratification it carried brought a grin to your face. It spurred you on with the promise that you could return the immense satisfaction Neil brought you. That you could make yourself memorable.

That notion inspired you to use the core strength and athletic training and topple Neil without letting you separate. His sharp gasp told you it was the last thing he expected. Good. From your new position astride him, you watched his heaving chest as Neil processed your impish trick. Warm light painted his skin and made his hair look like a golden halo belonging to a fallen angel. An angel worth the fall from the heavens.

Before he could recover fully, you rolled your hips and rose on your knees to fall again in the slightest of moves. It only strengthened the titillation on his face, but it did the trick. His blue eyes blinked awake as his hands found their purchase again, skating over your thighs to rest on your hips. With your subtle nod, he guided you to match the desired tempo.

Like this, with full opportunity to control the pace, you could allow yourself to stare. To take note of the subtle changes on his face. Like the crease between his eyebrows begging to be smoothed out. Or the panting mouth, pink parted lips still red from the kisses. Or the pearls of sweat on his temples and chest, proving that you were doing something right. Proving that perhaps Neil would remember you.

The coil in your lower stomach was tight now, feeling close to bursting and bringing you another orgasm. You could tell Neil was close, too. It was visible in the bliss written all over his face, and the abdomen muscles pulled tight. Your fingers grazed over his chest, drawing mindless patterns and bringing out goosebumps as a reward. As if able to read your mind or feeling the way you constricted around his length, Neil met your haze and raised his hand to place it between your thighs. Thumb on the clit, circling the bud with a rhythm that by now he knew would work. Just like that. Without you ever having to ask.

The realisation alone was why you could not stay quiet any longer.

“Neil-” a pathetic sob interrupted the sentence with no aim in sight, so the rest came out in a rush, barely aware of what you were saying, “You’re perfect,”

It didn’t make the words any less true. Any less real.

But still, it was not something he anticipated. Neil glanced at you, and before he could school his features into a less vulnerable expression, you noticed hints of uncertainty. Something else was there, too, occupying the dark depths of his pupils and shining through the greyish blue of his irises. It was gone before you could identify it, but you considered tattooing the exact shade of his eyes on your skin the morning after. You felt like it might match the shade of your heart tomorrow.

“You stole my line” there was no genuine grievance in the look he gave you, instantly bucking his hips into yours to make you swear and shiver. You were so close now. The edges of your vision were growing fuzzy again as you felt your inner muscles contract and squeeze around him, eliciting another groan and a sigh that matched the words echoing in your head, “Jesus Christ…” it took him another second of composure to find the words that only confirmed your suspicions “Cupid, I’m not gonna-” using his seconds of distraction, you leaned forward to deepen the contact and covered his mouth with yours, interrupting the sentence.

With the kiss, as hungry and devouring as always, you hoped to convey everything you could not tell him. That he mattered. That you were beginning to worry he had ruined you for anybody else. Ever. That although you would try, nothing would ever be the same again.  Neil took the kiss with an eagerness that was still somehow startling. He nipped and licked at your lips, ensuring they stayed red and swollen. Only when another moan escaped the confines of his mouth and made it impossible to continue the kiss, you broke the contact and met his delirious gaze with a smile. You could feel his rhythm stutter and wane as he visibly approached orgasm. There was just one thing left to about it.

“Come for me” although piecing together a sentence was a struggle, the reward in the form of Neil’s muffled curse and full-body shudder was worth it. You watched as his abdomen muscles tensed, and he began thrusting with no rhythm or pace, helping you chase the feeling that was just around the corner. Leaning forward again, you placed your hand over his head and whispered into his ear, “Now,”

The word acted like a trigger. Neil stiffened in your embrace, his hands seeking out your waist and holding tight. Without thinking, you rested your forehead against his and felt him fill you to the brim. Warmth spread through your core, making you clench around him one last time before your body gave in. White sparks filled your vision as you closed your eyes and entangled your fingers in his hair. You could finally let go. A pleasured scream rang through the silence of the room as you collapsed, limbs falling lifelessly against his sturdy form. For a split second of stupid indulgence, you let yourself believe that Neil would always be there to catch you.

But that wasn’t a happy ending people like you wanted. Or deserved.

You were half aware of what came after. Of how your body trembled in Neil’s embrace and how he whispered your favourite nickname repeatedly, filling the word with enough affection to bruise your heart purple. You knew you should cut this short to prevent the inevitable awkwardness that almost always followed as fast as possible. But you couldn’t. Not yet.

Instead, you snuggled into the crook of his neck and inhaled, feeling the ache in your body. It would hurt like a bitch tomorrow, you were sure. But for now, you focused on the steady rise and fall of his chest and the comfort of his hands resting on your naked waist and back. By some miracle, it seemed like Neil was one of the few men who did not mind your desire to snuggle and breathe instead of quickly dismissing whatever transpired between you as an unimportant rendezvous on the timelines of your lives.

Yet, soon enough, you had to break the silence. The best way you knew how.

“You’re such a good boy” as soon as the words left your mouth, carried on a teasing tone, and accompanied by the smirk hidden in his neck, Neil’s comforting touch stilted.

Judging by the hitch in his chest and an ill-disguised cough, he choked on the breath intake. Even in the confused depths of your mind, you had to admit it was rather adorable. And it most definitely did the trick by diffusing the tension caused by the deafening silence and your synched-up heartbeats, which had no right to exist. Not here. Not ever.

“You’re incorrigible” laughter rang through the letters in his response as Neil chuckled dryly and resumed the caress, letting his fingers skim up and down the ridges of your spine.

You never wanted to move again.

That’s why it was high time to do so.

“You love it, though,” the rebuttal was easy to conjure as you lifted on your forearms and slid off his body with an apologetic smile. The gasp at the loss of contact and emptiness that followed was inevitable but also necessary. Laying down on your side so that you could see his face, you spoke, “Damn, that was…” before any accurate adjective could be found, Neil turned onto his side, mirroring your position and met your gaze, striking you mute in the process.

There was something indescribable there. A vastness of emotions you could not decipher without delving into that scary territory of your understanding that was never meant to be breached. Especially not like this. Not right now.

So, instead, you let your eyes take in his beauty, and the fading blush, complete with lips kissed raw and tangled hair. A look so thoroughly labelled as ‘freshly well-fucked’ that no other words were necessary or even advised. Even better so that you were the sole cause and reason. A point of pride, in fact.

“Good?” the joy in his gaze was enough reason to banish the strange thoughts and focus on the fact that his question demanded an answer.

As much as you were almost positive Neil knew just how damn good the sex had been, it still seemed like he wanted to hear it from you. You were happy to comply.

“Very good” a smug grin was complimented by the satisfaction Neil was bound to see in your radiant gaze.

Strengthening the point, you shifted closer to him to place your hand over his heart and winked. It did the job. Neil flashed you a bashful smile and leaned over to press a peck onto the crown of your head. That was an unprecedented act. Something that had never happened before. Terrifying in its novelty.

The realisation was enough to make you sit up and gather the covers to gain at least an illusion of modesty. A glance at the alarm clock told you how late it was, with the digits flashing a remorseful 02:27 AM. It was high time to make a move.

Without waiting for Neil to catch up with the drastic changes in your demeanour, you reached towards the chair next to the bed, where your dressing gown had landed that morning due to marvellous luck and got up to put it on in one, practised move. Only then could you look back at Neil to say:

“I’ll be right back,” sending him a smile that was hopefully neutral enough so that he would not understand the depths of your inner turmoil, you turned on your heel and waltzed out of the bedroom straight down the corridor to the bathroom.

Once the door had been closed, you let out a relieved sigh and met your crazed gaze in the mirror. Your hair was a tangled mess, and your lips were kissed red, telling a simple tale. As were the faint pink marks left on your neck, which would require concealer tomorrow. It was all worth it. You knew as much without having to search your heart. At least now you understood what it was that you craved so badly. How it felt and how it tasted. Now you knew what about Neil made you feel so insane.

And now, knowing all of it, you also understood that just once would not be enough. It couldn’t be.

Armed with that knowledge and the particular pain of realisation that often accompanied those hard-hitting truths concerning interpersonal relationships, you also knew what you needed to happen. You had to do everything in your might to keep Neil close. To ensure you would not lose a dear friend so quickly after gaining him.

As you stared at the bathroom floor tiles, you reminded yourself of the crucial detail that it was all in Neil’s hands. He would be the one dealing the cards. The one deciding what awaited you next. The best you could do was be yourself and not scare him off prematurely. Easy, right?

A quiet scoff answered the rhetorical question as you dried your hands with a towel and turned towards the door again. Now onto the harder part…

If there was one rule you had, one that you never, ever crossed no matter the circumstances, it was that you never stayed for the night or invited whoever you had sex with to stay over at your place. Simple. Except for that first time you had to bring it up with someone new. Like now.

Before you could even consider deciding how to go about it or how to signal what you needed to happen without making the situation painfully awkward, you walked out into the corridor to see Neil standing in the doorway of your bedroom. He was finishing buttoning up the shirt and met your gaze with an understanding smile:

“I’ll get going” no matter how hard you looked, you could not see hurt or grudge in his eyes or in the shrug he sent as he put on the tie and tightened the knot.

That was certainly a relief. A cop-out, but you were not the one to argue with fate when it offered easy wins. But-

“Are you sure?” you had to ask.

Not that you were willing to break the rule, but you had to know that he was okay with it. Because, for some unknown reasons, what Neil felt and thought seemed important in ways you did not begin to understand. It was just a fact.

“Yeah. It’s late anyway” the assured look in his eyes told you there was no point in prodding further. Instead, you watched as he put on the vest and fastened the buttons. Before you could get lost in thoughts, Neil spoke again, “Thanks, though, it was… a very memorable night” the hint of a smile in his voice was clarified by the bright grin he offered.

It was a wild, sharp thing that always felt so right on his face that you wondered how come he was not smiling all the time. Although that could cheapen the effect, you noticed upon a second thought.

The grin almost made you ignore the affection in his gaze. Almost.

“That it was” the blush on your cheeks was no longer as rare an occurrence as you wanted it to be, so you tried to hide it by glancing at the floor instead of holding his all-seeing gaze. The sentiment stayed true, “Message me when you get home?” it was another question that had to be asked although you could not understand why, “So that I know you’re not dead in a ditch somewhere?” because that concern was also something new.

You never cared quite so much. Never before. It was worrying in ways that made you want to hide your head in the sand and never poke out again for fear of the consequences crashing on top of it. But life rarely offered such mercies.

“Of course, Cupid” feeling Neil approach, you looked up in time to see him close the awkward gap between you.

He passed you in the corridor, the cuff of his shirt brushing against your arm as he raised his hand, visibly hesitating. Tilting your head in a silent question, you waited for him to decide. The resolution came in the form of his hand cupping your cheek for the briefest of seconds. The touch was gone before you could react, but the ghost of it stayed behind as you whispered:

“Thank you” it was another sentiment that needed no prompt or inspiration; it was just a fact.

Something that sprung from your heart like an overeager daffodil seedling breaking through the frozen February soil. Too early and bound to freeze before it could ever bloom into life.

“For?” Neil stopped in the doorway to the living room and stared back at you.

The expression on his face was impossible to puzzle out. It almost made everything easier. Easier to risk the freezing for the chance of elaborating on what you wanted him to know.

“Everything, really,” shrugging, you offered Neil a smile.

Not the sharp, dangerous grin he knew too well. No, it was a gentle thing; so ill-fitting of what you thought you understood about yourself.

But perhaps you understood nothing.

Not too long later, you heard him open the door to your apartment and let himself out quietly. You padded to the living room and picked up the used dirty wine glasses and the empty bottle. For a second, you contemplated smashing the bottle against your head to stop thinking. Then you realised the blood loss was probably not worth the passing relief. Probably.

***

Staring at the depths of the coffee in his mug, Neil sighed heavily for the umpteenth time within the past three hours that passed since waking up. Waking up in the new world, he unhelpfully added upon opening his eyes. As if his brain conspired to fuck him over, Neil could not stop thinking about it. About her. And everything that happened. All to the point that he barely slept within the odd four hours he snatched between stumbling into his apartment past 3 AM and waking up with a curse on his lips sometime after 7 AM. There was no sleep to be found after, so he gave up.

Visit to the gym did not cause any miracles either, but at least now he was free to sit on the sofa and stare into space. As if that would help. It is not even that anything was wrong. Or that he regretted the previous evening because he certainly did not. He did not. Everything that happened was something he wanted. Starting from the not-so-smooth seduction and ending with making her come. Three times. Not to be smug or anything. He wanted her. Full stop.

And now, having gotten the taste, Neil also knew that the desire would not stop there. She would not be just a box on a checklist, ticked and forgotten. Cupid was not someone he could forget. Even with the current prognosis, which was not optimistic. Because she laid out the modus operandi from day one. There would be no fantastic love story culminating with a kiss in the rain in the middle of Piccadilly Circus. Not even because of the high risk of being run over by a car.

Yet, still, being an idiot, Neil could not help but think. About her. About their evening. About how it felt. About what he wanted to happen next. All the while knowing that not much could happen beyond it. And nothing without Cupid’s will and desire for it. That knowledge did not help the thoughts or dilemmas playing out in his head.

With another heavy sigh, Neil got up from the sofa and walked over to the radio to put on music. If he was to suffer, he might as well do so with the accompaniment of bops. In the truest meaning of the word. Yet, the algorithm must have held a grudge against him, too, for he barely managed to down the remains of his coffee before trouble started. It all came crashing down with the voice of Simon Le Bon and a song Neil knew too well. Usually, he enjoyed it. Usually, there was nothing particularly stinging about this song. Usually, the opening synths and the bass rhythm did not elicit a groan and make him hide his face in his hands. Usually.

‘And you wanted to dance, so I asked you to dance

But fear is in your soul

Some people call it a one-night stand

But we can call it paradise

Don't say a prayer for me now

Save it 'til the morning after’

When the bridge came, along with the final chorus of the damned song, Neil was seething. Be it with rage or utter frustration. The accuracy of what was so beautifully sung by Duran Duran did not escape his attention. Or the fact that this was the first one-night stand he could not just let go. The first time, Neil was wallowing in self-pity and confusion at the state of his feelings and thoughts because of a hook-up.

Or what was supposed to be just a hook-up.

The problem was Neil was beginning to worry it was not just that. That it couldn’t be. And it was a terrible realisation to have. It made him want to be hit by a car on Piccadilly Circus. Or on the Oxford Street. He was not picky.

Quietly cursing every star on the firmament and the sparks in Cupid’s eyes, he reached for the phone and automatically opened the text conversation with the woman in question. Their last texts offered no respite from the suffering with how she bid him a good night after Neil informed her that he had found his way back home unscathed. It took him another two minutes to get his shit together and dial the number with a press of the correct icon on the screen.

Feeling the heartbeat in his throat as he awaited her to pick up the call, Neil stood up from the sofa and began pacing the living room. The seconds stretched into infinity, almost making him talk himself into ending the attempt and blaming the call on a mistake. Before he could act on the cowardice coursing in his veins, the click on the line followed by her voice acted like a heavy curtain, shutting off every doubt and uncertainty until all that remained was Cupid:

“Hi,” the breathlessness in her voice made it seem like she was not anticipating the call.

As if it caught her by surprise. Neil winced against the observation, forcing himself to reply.

“Hello. How are you?” even to his ears, the innocent question sounded strained.

It betrayed the motifs before he was ready to disclose them. His pacing has brought him to the window, so he stayed there, leaning against the sill.

An intake of breath from Cupid broke the silence before she replied:

“Good, great even. Achy as fuck, but then I got up to stuff last night, as you’d know” the slight nervousness in her quiet giggle sounded off, out of place among the implications.

The infuriating blush Neil did not seem able to get rid of even when closer to the age of thirty, made an appearance again. It bloomed across his cheekbones like weeds, making him hang his head with shame despite being the only one present in the room. Ever so helpful, his bitch of a brain chose this moment to show him a reel of last night’s events. Cupid underneath the stage lights, dancing with grace in every step. Her laughter upon the streets of Soho. The feel of her naked skin underneath his hands. The taste of her upon his tongue- Yeah, message received.

“Yeah, I was there” the ridiculous feeling of pride entered the crowded stage of his heart.

Before Neil could attempt to shrug it off, Cupid spoke again:

“You were. I remember you” her tone lowered almost imperceptibly, yet enough so Neil would notice. The low timbre spread across his chest with warmth as she added, “Vividly” the emphasis made everything worse as it awakened the exact shade of yearning he wanted to banish for eternity “Neil, I know you didn’t just call me to ask how my morning is going” the matter-of-fact turn in her voice was the wake-up call he needed.

It reminded Neil about the true purpose of the call and what he needed to say. Now, ideally. He took another deep breath, aware of the prolonged silence on the line and the rapid beat of his heart. It took him another second to convince convincing himself to speak the words into existence. All with the grace of an elephant stumbling over the vowels and tripping on the consonants:

“No... But it’s- I’ve never done this before. I had one-night stands, but not with someone like you” the ending came out in a rush as Neil tried to get it out as fast as possible without further embarrassment.

Although he knew that it was too late for those kinds of worries anyway. He was already a personification of shame in all meanings of the word.

The laugh he expected from Cupid upon such a pathetic display did not come. Instead, he got a quiet huff, which was hard to interpret with his lacklustre detective skills and a question carried on a soft tone:

“Not with a friend?” to Neil’s surprise, she did not sound judgemental or sarcastic, as if making a joke on his expanse.

Admittedly, it was what he anticipated, knowing how the sentence sounded and what it conveyed. Knowing what a loser he was, confessing the facts instead of pretending to be someone he was not. Instead of doing what he usually did.

For whatever reason, Neil increasingly often found that he did not want to pretend with Cupid. He particularly enjoyed those moments when it felt like she saw him and enjoyed the picture revealed. It was at once terrifying and exhilarating. It was what made him turn on the heel to press his back against the wall by the window and slide down to sit on the floor, risking yet another admission:

“Yeah, exactly. And like- It was amazing. It really was, but now I’m… I’m so… confused” the word hardly covered the state of his mind since waking up, but it had to do for now.

Somehow, Neil knew she would understand. She would find meaning within the stammers and pauses, interrupting the incoherent reasoning. She was smart like that.

Because the clue of the matter was that there were no regrets. No particle of his soul that wished last night did not happen. It’s just that he didn’t know what was coming next. If anything at all.

“I get it. It’s uncharted territory for you” once Cupid spoke again, Neil tried to determine her feelings on the topic from her voice. There was nothing to interpret apart from thoughtfulness and the desire to understand. To understand him, of all people. A feat few attempted and even fewer succeeded at, “From my point of view, nothing has to change between us. But I don’t think last night has to be a one-off. It could happen again” the meaning of her words took a while to sink, and even longer to be processed by his brain, slowed by incompetence and whatever charm she had him under. When it did, Neil sat up straighter, a rare sense of excitement tugging at his gut and making him open his eyes wider “If you wanted it to” the addition was almost a footnote.

Because, of course, he wanted to. He would be a fool not to. Right?

The enthusiastic reply was almost at the tip of his tongue, but the remains of dignity stepped in at the right time. Instead, Neil let the silence speak, taking a moment to ask the second most terrifying question. If not the first.

“And what about you?” the fate of his self-respect was placed upon the pedestal made of four words.

Ready to be crumbled with just one sleigh of her hand. While Neil knew Cupid enjoyed what he did to her (and with her), there was no guarantee. No way of knowing without asking her first. Now, all he could do was wait.

Wait and listen to her breathing through the phone, trying and miserably failing at not hanging upon each exhalation as if it were a sentence determining the rest of his life. Luckily, Cupid was not the one to make him wait in misery for too long.

“I’d definitely want a repeat” the certainty in her voice felt like a rush of blood to his head.

It was tinted with that shade of playfulness he considered her trademark. It was barely there, but still, it made everything easier. Brighter.

Now Neil did not even try to fight off the grin from his face as he asked:

“Yeah?” it was just another lousy trick to make her confirm what should have been obvious but was not.

At least not to his stupid brain, burdened with the eternal fear of not being enough. Ever. For anyone. Not even as a friend that you occasionally shag.

“Yes,” Cupid did not hesitate, humouring him joyfully.

Or at least that is how Neil interpreted the light chuckle that followed the reply. It eased the burden a little, but soon he found another pressing question that needed answering. Should they continue… whatever it was that was happening. Phrases like the infamous ‘friends with benefits’ started floating around his head, but for the time being, Neil brushed them away.

“So, if we did… do it again, what are the ground rules?” the clumsy wording was something he could do without, but alas, there was no choice.

He could only hope that Cupid would ignore the failure. It was the very next thing he needed to settle. The rules of play, per se. It was a completely new territory for him, something he had never done or entertained because there was no reason to. No person was worth the confusion. But now- Yeah, now there was. And Neil had no fucking clue how it all made him feel. Or whether he was not making the mistake of his life by even considering the concept. Still, he ignored the idea as Cupid broke the silence with a factual voice:

“No staying over afterwards for the night, and you must tell me if you find someone to be with for real. I don’t want to be the mythical other woman” the business-like tone suggested what Neil already knew – this was not the first time for her.

Far from it. He added a strange pinprick of jealousy to the ongoing list of feelings and thoughts to be ignored and rested his forehead against his folded knees.

The simplicity of the do’s and don’ts was undeniable. Still, it was impossible to tell how bad of a decision it would be on the endless spectrum of ‘ways to fuck up’ that Neil knew too well. From experience.

“Okay,” he nodded, although she would not see it and risked another question. To calm the running thoughts before they escaped his control entirely, “Is it fine if I think about it for a while?”

The pros were easy to think of. If he agreed, this one night would not have to be the only time Neil would have her. He could keep acting on what came to him so effortlessly when near Cupid. He could touch and kiss her as he pleased, whenever he wanted, without first worrying whether it would destroy their friendship.

But the cons were not hard to come by either. Adding sex into the equation often destroyed the friendship on its own. Neil was not sure whether he could trust himself to be as detached emotionally as the situation required him to be. He would never actually have her. Not that he wanted to. Because he didn’t. He didn’t.

“Sure thing, sunshine. We don’t have to change anything right now” her steady reassurance stopped the increasingly frantic thought processes and filled his chest with warmth.

Neil never knew he was a fan of nicknames. Of being called sunshine. But apparently, he was.

The sudden wave of peace settling over his head was the only sign that the conversation was successful. He has reached at least some sort of clarity. Even if he still had no clue what the hell he was supposed to do.

“I’ll see you Wednesday. Like always?” the pathetic edge to that question did not escape him.

But it was impossible to end the call without asking. Without checking whether Neil had something to look forward to. Without ensuring that they were okay.

At this point, Neil did not even try to pretend that Wednesdays did not become his favourite day of the week. For absolutely no reason.

“Yeah, you will” the internal debate about whether he actually could hear her wink got quickly interrupted by Cupid’s question, “And Neil?” a noncommittal hum had to do instead of a reply, what with his brain becoming a lost cause. Still, it was impossible not to wait on her addition with bated breath and heartbeat thundering in his ears. You know, like a normal person would “You know I can’t offer you a relationship, but what we have still means a lot to me. It’s not every day that I have sex this good with my best friend” this time, Neil could definitely hear the sly smile in her voice.

That strange smugness and pride returned to fill his chest with warmth and painted a grin on his face. It was the highest of praises. Both because Cupid admitted that whatever they had was worth her time and attention and because she confirmed that the previous night was… satisfying. It was a challenge not to let that get into his head, successfully distracting Neil from any other thought he could have had.

He was a simple man, alright? One spoonful of praise placed at his feet, and he was done for. In all meaning of the word.

“No?” the joy was audible in his voice as he risked a tease, “I’m such a lucky bastard, then” it was barely an overstatement.

Even if it all was to backfire spectacularly and bite him in the ass soon, Neil felt lucky. Lucky that Cupid wanted to waste her time on him. Even for a wink of her time.

And yes, he knew he sounded like a pathetic simp. He was aware of it, thank you very much.

“You are” her laughter still rang in his ear as she whispered a necessary goodbye, “I’ll talk to you soon,” for once, Neil felt no need to question her promise.

No reason to doubt.

“Bye, Cupid,” his farewell was met with another chuckle before the woman in question ended the phone call.

Slowly, Neil put down the phone and raised his head to stare at the ceiling. The white paint was occasionally spruced up with cobwebs, reminding him just how long had passed since he had last deep cleaned the apartment. A sigh had to do before Neil got up from the floor and turned up the music.

Duran Duran had nothing on him now. Surely.

[spacedlexi]

I am madly in love with your artstyle and its been a big big inspiration for me as of late. Also, what are your thoughts on Jane and Bonnie? Do you like them or not

AAA thank you so much thats so flattering to hear 🥺💕!!

my feelings on jane and bonnie are nuanced just like my opinion on many of twdg characters. but i love twdg for all its messy fucked up characters :) its fun :) so while i dont hate either of them they definitely still do things that piss me off

in janes case, i think her mentorship/sisterhood with clem came more from her guilt about her sister than actually wanting to have this 11 year old around. so while she would teach clem important survival skills, she was also always quick to leave or act selfishly (clems "i thought you believed in me 🥺" always makes me sad). and this is just solidified by her actions in her S3 flashbacks. i do think she TRIES to work with the group, but she just gets in her own way and is never able to fully integrate, especially since the S2 cast is a fucked up mess in and of itself so its understandable. her actions at the end of S2 are born of pure selfishness, leaving a newborn infant in a random freezing vehicle so she could "show clem what kenny was really like" when clem is WELL AWARE of the thread this madman is hanging on to (having already faced the brunt of his frustrations MULTIPLE times at this point, and is desperate not to lose anyone else). she wanted a fight and she got one. i think maybe she told herself it was about saving clem, but honestly i dont think that was really ever her goal. again i just think a lot of her motivation comes out of the guilt of leaving her sister behind, so she saw clem as a second chance to make things right. but depending on clems actions, she can end up on her own without either of them, and jane can be the sister left behind to die. its interesting to see clem kinda pick up janes personality in the first half of S3 now that shes also at a point where she has no one and trusts no one, and is deep down lonely and longing for community. the difference is clem is not selfish (while still caring about self preservation), and actually likes being able to help people when she can. shes more so just afraid of caring for people again to protect herself from what she sees is the inevitable pain of losing them, as opposed to janes "theyre all just gonna bring you down so you should be on your own instead" outlook. but i definitely saw jane (and luke) as a bigger mentor/big sister(/brother) figure to clem than kenny was to her. jane actually taught her how to take care of herself. kenny was just someone from her past she didnt want to let go of

in bonnies case, she can be really horrible to clem if she listened to luke and stayed back instead of trying to grab him, so i'll literally try to save luke just so i dont have to hear it 😭 but also i like the convo her and clem have on the steps if you tried to save him. its an important character moment for clem, being asked what SHE wants instead of what the people around her want, and that she should start thinking about that, which is formative to the decision she makes (or fails to make) at the rest stop. the way bonnie is initially dismissive of carvers behavior i think is supposed to mirror the way clem can be dismissive of kennys behavior after leaving howes. will they come to see the man they once respected is becoming someone unstable? (i used to be in the "kenny might be going crazy but he'd never hurt clem" camp UNTIL i picked the "lee shouldnt have tried to save me 😔" option in the car and kenny threatened to smack her for it AFTER giving it a moment of hesitation so he KNEW what he was saying there. my jaw was dropped. but kenny is just another interesting flawed character in a game of interesting flawed characters (although they Heavily backtracked on the kenny/carver parallels in the S3 flashbacks. you can make the argument hes happier now but idk he cant come back from the threat for me he MEANT that)). bonnie leaving with mike is fucked but understandable, and she can show real concern after clem gets shot before getting chased off by kenny. i hope her and mike are still out there somewhere i dont hate either of them, even tho it was horrible of them to steal ALL of their supplies when they knew they were leaving TWO children behind. like cmon. but overall i liked bonnie :) shes a bit of a mess but i like her for it

in the end i am a twdg woman character forgiver :) i do love all the fucked up ladies its refreshing let them do dumb shit and make mistakes!!! i love mess :)

[cowboysandpilots]

Hangster Ask

A hitchhiker, who favors the heart over the head.

A bed and breakfast owner, who has become jaded.

It's a romance-tinged story about accidental love. It kicks off near the beach with someone being accused of theft. (Note that: someone in the story is still haunted by a past mistake.)

And there's a twist! The best friend gets the happy ending first.

You don't have to do all of it, just pieces if you find something interesting.

(I LOVE the hitchhiker and b&b owner concept, so I went with that. Thank you 💕)

—

Jake really should've thought things through more before he decided to leave his whole life behind with nothing but the clothes on his back. In his defence, things had become boring, and the only thing he could think to do was to get out. To make something exciting happen.

He stood on the side of the road with his thumb out, thankful that it was a rare nice day, not too hot and not raining. It wasn't torture to stand outside for hours which is what Jake ended up doing. People were pretty weary of letting a random person into their car, but he had made it this far, and he couldn't just go back now.

At some point, his legs started to ache from pacing along the side of the road, and he found a small patch of grass where he could sit down for just a minute. Only after his ass makes contact with the ground does someone pull over and wave him up, inviting him over.

The driver asks Jake where he wants to go, and he realizes that he has no earthly idea where he wants to go or what the hell he's doing. "Uh... just the nearest place, I guess." He shrugs.

The driver gives him a curious look but starts driving anyway and doesn't say another word until they pull up to small and very homey looking bed and breakfast. The only reason that Jake knows it's a bed and breakfast is because of the sign out at the front. If there was no sign, he probably would have assumed that it was somebody's house.

"This is it."

He wasn't going to argue with the man, he had asked to be taken to the nearest place, and here it was. Given the loose parameters of what Jake had asked for, he was just grateful that it wasn't somebody's house. What would he do then, just get out and hope someone else picked him up?

Jake got out of the truck, feet hitting the pavement with a rough slap, and he waved the driver off as a thank you before he walked up the small stone walkway to the modest white house with a balcony across the top and the bottom and a blue door at the front.

Bradley never thought that he would be running a bed and breakfast. It was always his mom's gig, but after she passed away, he felt a responsibility to take it over. He hadn't wanted to hand it off to someone who might ruin everything she had built.

At first, he enjoyed it, but as time went on, and fewer and fewer people cared about going to bed and breakfasts over the choice of a hotel, he couldn't help but feel like he was doing the exact thing he thought all those prospective buyers would do, failing his mom.

A knock at the door pulled Bradley from his thoughts. Most people, once they saw the 'open' sign, just walked right in and never knocked. He got up out of his chair at the dining room table and went to open the door with a soft sigh.

Even looking at the beautiful, slightly dishevelled man standing on the other side of the door, Bradley couldn't get up the motivation to give him more than a soft smile and a flat greeting. He should maybe work on his customer service; it used to be much better, but years of this place wearing him down had left him exhausted all the way down to his bones.

"You have any rooms available?" Jake asks brightly, pulling Bradley yet again from his cloudy head.

"Yeah, lots of 'em. You looking for one?" Of course, he was; why else would he be here? But the words left Bradley's mouth before he could stop them, stepping aside to let the man in. He moved behind the small front desk and pulled a key off the hook.

"How much?" The man asks, and even though he's already reaching into his pocket for his wallet and Bradley knows nothing of his story, he feels a strange urge to give the man a discounted price on his room. A gentle voice inside his head that sounds suspiciously like his mom.

"$50," Bradley answers easily, half price; that should be enough to get the ghost of his mom off his back.

Jake nods and pulls $50 of cash out of his wallet, and sets it on the wooden desk. "I'm Jake, by the way." He smiles, and again, Bradley's smile doesn't reach his tired eyes.

"Bradley."

"It's nice to meet you, Bradley." Jake gives a wink and wanders off to go find the room number that's printed on his key tag. If he wasn't so eager to get a shower, he would've stayed to get to know the brooding owner some more.

It didn't take long for Bradley to become interested in Jake. Who he was and where he came from. It was hard not to when Jake was the only occupant that Bradley had in over a week. There wasn't much to do except talk to each other. Bradley was the only worker, and Jake was the only guest.

Things started off with Bradley cooking Jake's meals like he was supposed to, but after about a week of Jake living there, it turned into the two of them cooking together. Slowly, Jake could feel his attempts to get Bradley out of his shell working. The man was smiling more, he seemed lighter, and he didn't flinch away when Jake leaned in a little too close.

Jake had always been very big on one philosophy, and that is, 'Don't think, just do.' It had been working out for him so far, that's how he ended up here, so when his brain was screaming at him again to do something after two weeks alone with the older man, he pulled Bradley in and kissed him square on the mouth.

It was a miracle to Jake when Bradley didn't immediately pull away. When he kisses back with just as much enthusiasm as Jake gave him and even pulls him in by his hips. The pair only separate from each other, breathless and flushed, when the little bell on the door rings.

—

✨Request a $1 blurb?✨

[puppypeter]

I know that the whole idol/super fan dynamic is like, a core component of what makes RoyJamie so delicious, but I CANNOT escape the hilarity potential of famous!Jamie/chronically offline!Roy.

Like, in this au, Roy wouldn't be a footballer (which is also intriguing to me because that's such a key facet of his character, so I'd be interested to hear from you what other careers Roy might have!!) and it is essential that he is also chronically offline, like near hermit levels of sheltered from pop-culture.

Roy would then obviously meet Jamie for some contrived fanfic reason (my running idea is that they meet maybe in a late season two/season three timeline when Jamie is doing his self-motivated 4am training. Jamie motivated for Zava reasons and Roy motivated to avoid crowds/the heat). Roy would have his wattpad 'im not like other girls' moment when Jamie approaches him, obviously assuming Roy will recognise him, which Roy does not.

Of course this leads to Jamie fixating on this grumpy old twat whose buttons Jamie can soo easily press and who seems to have no fucking clue who he is. Roy will become like, Jamie's yoga mums, especially because at this point in time Jamie would still be pretty infamous what with everything going on with his career, so I think having someone who doesn't have a preexisting idea of who he is would be extremely refreshing for Jamie.

This of course leads to a slow burn strangers to lovers situation with the obvious angst potential of a civilian/celebrity fic (paparazzi, privacy, 'oh our worlds are so different, how could this ever work', etc).

ALTERNATIVELY, Roy could actually know who Jamie Tartt is, but for whatever reason he finds him annoying and when they meet he just pretends not to know who he is just to knock him down a peg. This version of the au has the fun potential of the whole 'i know who you are' reveal, but I'm undecided on which direction it should go.

Anyways, thanks for letting me word dump in your inbox, I LOVE your blog and your RoyJamie posts!! 💕💕

i love people word dumping about royjamie in my inbox ❤💙

I also love the famous/non famous. There's not many AUs in this fandom as being a footballer is such a core part of who they are it is difficult to imagine otherwise but coming from other fandoms I have so many ideas (take capitan america/stucky having many AUs and many capitan america/modern bucky barnes too)

I love the idea of Roy not knowing who Jamie is at all. I do have a think for the non-famous person having the most random normal jobs ever like

working the till at the grocey store (I wrote a post once about them meeting at 6am when roy starts work and jamie is stopping for water cause I'd seen a Tesco guy that looked like roy from far away lol) (funnily i often picture step dad simon in this job and that's how him and georgie met and they've actually known each other since jamie was a baby but it took him many years to ask her out)

grocery delivery guy (quiet, peaceful, listens to audiobooks while driving)

park ranger (again can meet at 5am, kudos if jamie sneaks into richmond park and roy fucking hates him for it until he gives up and lets him do it)

classics like baker, coffee shop, bookshop, mechanic etc

I do love the grumpy roy thinking jamie is a pretentious early morning running twat whose colourful atrocious shoes are blinding him. Like he doesn't know Jamie has a legit reason to do all that aka his career.

And of course the angst that would come from stepping into Jamie's world. I did see a post not long ago about a Jamie that is more bashful around dating (and also more protective of his privacy as he was in canon with Keeley). But also would be cute him bringing his fit older boyfriend to the charity gala.

Or what if he knew him from Lust Conquers All that he watched with the yoga mums and had no idea he was a footballer? Then he thinks Jamie is a very superficial guy, a cheater who only cares about his looks etc before Jamie annoys him day after day and he slowly falls for him.

Ok what if he and the yoga mums worked together somehow? He is the maintenance guy or the grumpy receptionist at the yoga gym / massage place or the grumpy delivery guy at the diner who covers the night shift at the counter so he can prep stuff and restock etc and jamie is there at 5am every morning for eggs and a chat and like the first 5 times it's just Jamie yapping on and on with a lot of sighs from Roy. Maybe it's the post-return to Richmond Jamie who is still very lonely, away from his family, no agent, no keeley, no team friends yet (remember how he kept going to keeley to talk and she took him to dr sharon? that didn't happen and he just decided roy would do.. and tbf he does tip well at least ahah)

I have sooooo manyyyyy thoughts!!!😊😊😊😊

[razowor]

✍ Favorite thing about writing the muse?

👀Favorite thing about the muse’s appearance?

🌌Favorite alternate version of the muse?

💕Favorite ship for the muse? 

💔Least favorite ship for the muse?

💢Something about the muse that annoys you?

😈Worst thing you’ve ever done to your muse? 

😂Funniest thing that’s ever happened to your muse? 

💡 What inspires you to write the muse? 

📷 Favorite picture/screencap of your muse?

📑 Favorite part of your muse’s backstory? 

📝 Favorite headcanon for your muse? 

😒 Is there anything canon about your muse that you ignore? 

🔮 What do you see in your muse’s future? 

🔥 Unpopular opinion about your muse? 

💭 Favorite memory of the muse? 

😩 Hardest thing about writing the muse? 

⌨ What’s a situation you’ve always wanted to RP with the muse? 

🎭 How similar are you and the muse? 

Mun talks about the Muse

With four of these already answered, I guess I'll go with the rest of the questions XD

👀 Favorite thing about the muse’s appearance?

His overall outfit seems good, the more I look at it. Maybe a bit too much with the "belts". But what I actually like from his appearance is...

THIS BIG GUY

🌌 Favorite alternate version of the muse?

I am yet to choose which alternate version I like for him. So I'll leave this unanswered for now lol

💕 Favorite ship for the muse?

Shipping him with Barbara is at the top of the list. And there's also with Fischl.

💔 Least favorite ship for the muse?

I'm not much of a fan with the Rannett ship (the one with Bennett). Not that I hate it, but it's more of a meh to me.

💢 Something about the muse that annoys you?

Some of his EN voicelines are kinda cringe to me. For me, they feel forced, for the lack of better term to describe them XD

😂 Funniest thing that’s ever happened to your muse?

If we talk about the canon events, it was back in the first summer event when he and the other guys where en route to GAA by riding on Dvalin. But then Razor decided to sky dive because he got some Tanjiro level of sniffing to even catch the smell of strange stuff below.

📷 Favorite picture/screencap of your muse?

📑 Favorite part of your muse’s backstory?

In all seriousness, his motivation to become stronger to protect those he cared about so the same shit happened to his wolf fam won't happen to them.

📝 Favorite headcanon for your muse?

Him being overall chaotic in a funny way that he might get punished by Lisa when caught.

😒 Is there anything canon about your muse that you ignore?

A lot. I mean some things I don't see him doing but had occurred in-game is him playing TCG. Like I think he'd at least take a grasp on it?

Though I guess it's just me not doing any TCG-related events in the game.

🔮 What do you see in your muse’s future?

Me thinks he'd soon be able to fulfill his promise of protecting others, in a sense. Also being able to accustom himself to the human society more but not straying too far from his wolf family.

🔥 Unpopular opinion about your muse?

How the Weinlesefest event was handled feels more of a filler event. Perhaps a bias on my end because while it involves on finding out Razor's real parents, it didn't seem like it was done well story-wise and was mostly rushed.

💭 Favorite memory of the muse?

Had to find this particular scene because this is hilarious to me.

😩 Hardest thing about writing the muse?

With my current portrayal of him, I guess it's how to react at what could be too complicated to him. Like sure, he'd mostly complain about it. But there are times that he won't and... yeah, it's hard to imagine sometimes.

⌨ What’s a situation you’ve always wanted to RP with the muse?

I haven't really thought that much as I mostly do silly stuff with him. Though some rare stuff like shipping and angst would be cool :o

[carnivorousyandeere]

NSFW Alphabet: Wisteria

MDNI

CW: smutty, kinky, mention of lactation kink, pet play, calling Wisteria “Mommy,” penetration, risky play, maybe a hint of somno? (Wet dream)

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Wisteria is very gentle and careful with you, and adores taking care of you afterwards. She likes how weak and shaky you can get, and she looooves it even more if you get clingy. (Although she might almost fall asleep before remembering she needs to do aftercare for you💀)

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Wisteria’s favorite parts of your body and faer own are the eyes. Her gaze can get very intense, and she makes eye contact with you more than is normal (not that my autistic ass would be able to tell). You don’t necessarily have to look her in the eyes back if it makes you uncomfortable though 💕

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Fae doesn’t want to penetrate your ass or cunt with her “magic wand,” as it gives faer dysphoria, so no creampies back there. Your mouth is fair game though, and you’re more than free to creampie faer ;)

Wisteria adores seeing you on your knees, eyes hazy, their cum dripping down your lips, even down to your neck and chest…

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Wisteria would secretly love it if you called them Mommy 😳

(Maybe has an even more deeply-buried lactation kink waiting to be unlocked…)

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Wisteria’s “experience” is limited to one or two fumbling trysts in undergrad, kinky smut fics, and solo play. Her technique may not be the best yet, but she always knows what to say to make you feel weak and needy.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

You, on your knees in front of her. Alternatively, missionary where you’re grinding against her or fucking into her.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Wisteria is more serious, especially as a Dom through-and-through. They might laugh at you during, but not so much with you.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

They keep their hair very short down there, and might have even tried bleaching or dying the hair down there. Probably didn’t go very well. Has a very cute little happy trail too 🥺

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

“Kinky,” and “romantic” don’t often overlap in a lot of people’s minds, but I think for you and her it does. The mutual exchange of power feels vulnerable, connecting. Her domination of you is deeply romantic, in its way. Does it not make your heart flutter to hear faer say, “Good job, pet~” as she holds your chin so gently, in or out of sex?

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Wisteria will use their fingers to muff faeself, usually, as it’s less messy than anal fingering, and imagine you, sitting pretty with a collar and leash… the faces you’d make when fae tugs on it…

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Muffing, cockwarming while gaming (her cock down your throat, OR her sitting on your strap/cock), HUGE thing for pet play (you’re the pet), having you collared and leashed (obviously), bit of a Mommy kink, orgasm control, some regency roleplay, praising you, you worshiping her, some humiliation.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Her bed or gaming chair 😏

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Seeing you act all protective of faer in public, like her guard dog or royal knight, makes faer want to spoil and reward you when you both get home~!

The more submissive and obedient you are in private, the more excited fae gets.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

She would not penetrate you with her cock in the ass or cunt, due to dysphoria, but she’s creative and might wear a strap-on over her cock to penetrate you anyway.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Wisteria is alright at giving head, but greatly prefers receiving. Just something about the way you whine around faer as fae cums down your throat… or the way your breath and voice are so raspy after cockwarming her for hours….

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

They’re more of a soft dom than a hard dom. Tends to be more slow and sensual, easing you into mindless obedience and reliance on her, but she can definitely be fast and rough or encourage you to be (especially when she tugs on your leash while you fuck her).

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Wisteria thinks they’re nice, but only in private where nobody can catch you.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Wisteria is willing to try out some painful and potentially dangerous kinks, like knifeplay, waxplay, etc if you want to, even though she’s not a hardcore sadist (emotional sadism is more up her alley). They follow the RACK philosophy of kink, and make sure to take as many precautions as possible and let you decide your limits.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Their stamina is either -10% or 100,000%, no in-between. It’s difficult to predict how long and involved any day or session will go with them 💀

On low-energy days, they’ll likely just have you service faer until fae’s satisfied, and leave you wanting. If you’re lucky, maybe they’ll let you touch yourself in front of them or hump their boot to get off.

High-energy days mean more involved and reciprocal scenes.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Wisteria has sooooo many toys for the both of you. Fae’s tried almost every type of toy on the market herself, but finds it more enjoyable to use them on you.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Wisteria can be very teasing, getting you riled up and then forbidding you from touching yourself, leaning into your ear to whisper praise in public… She’s got the condescending, fake-pity Dom voice down to a science.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Wisteria’s voice is rarely loud, and sex is no different. They tend to make satisfied, breathy noises rather than full moans. Her voice takes on that breathy quality too, soft but undeniably authoritative, sending shivers down your spine with every order, praise, or mocking word.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Their breasts and nipples are very sensitive from their hormone regimen, so softly kneading and licking at them is sure to get faer worked up.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Wisteria’s cock and balls are just as pretty as the rest of her. They’re on the small side, and her tip is a very cute soft pink, that flushes deeply when she gets worked up. And of course I must mention the adorable, soft brown happy trail again 🫣

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Wisteria’s a perv (affectionate) with the sex drive to match, even if her actual energy levels can’t always keep up. They’ll wanna play with you at least once most days, and probably multiple times each day.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Wisteria falls asleep very quickly at all times, especially after any physical exertion. So she’s definitely halfway to snoozing during aftercare and probably falls asleep on top of you.

BONUS sleep headcanon: Wisteria is a sleep-cuddler, wrapped like a koala around a squishmallow or you, and you will occasionally wake up to her grinding against you in her sleep 😳

[petrichoraline]

hey petri! how are you doing? i feel like i don't see you around here that much anymore! hope everything is going alright ❤️ is there any show you're currently watching or any new music you've discovered? xx

🥹 that's one of the sweetest messages honestly

I appreciate you noticing, I appreciate you reaching out, basically I want to give you a big hug and a smooch on the forehead 😚

I am doing well <3 but im easily irritated and moody so when something ruffles my feathers it might take a bit till I get back into a good mood and for some reason I've just been feeling progressively lonelier and more annoyed coming on here. I dread catching up on posts I have decided I have to make (tho nobody actually cares about them (im not being petty, im literally talking about things ppl don't care about like catching up on tag games and stuff hahah)) and also don't really feel motivated to work on any others. when I work on smth and it doesn't get recognition I feel demotivated and that's been the case with most of my last posts that took quite a bit of effort. I want to give a good answer to a trope question in my inbox and the other asks in there but I just. don't have it in me rn

basically in some ways i function not unlike a child and so im figuratively on the other end of the playground picking at grout and moping 🤣

also I haven't really been watching any asian dramas, ive mostly been binging taskmaster 🤔 last thing I watched was probably cherry magic and I still have to catch up on an episode :] so there's not much to post about, you know <3

as for my irl I've been emotional as well and I open the app with the intention to maybe vent but idk, it feels bad when I do that and more often than not it remains unnoticed, its kinda like I just went to a central city street and took my clothes off and everyone gave me dirty looks lmao

new music.. I've been interested in dpr ian lately though I haven't really acted on that. and he's featuring in a song that drops tomorrow so maybe you could check that out ☺️

also I listened to That Summer by SHAUN yesterday and it's lovely

thank you for sending me such a sweet and thoughtful message💓💝🥹💞💗💕💓💗💝 i vented a bit but you did ask how I was doing and im not exactly the type to just say "it's all good" 😅 it still is good though! so please don't worry 💕 sending you kisses

[stayxlix]

Yandere fics aren't usually my cup of tea but of course I had to read yours, and of course you didn't disappoint 🥹 I liked it veeery much, thank you for your hard work!! Reading it reminded me of an old idea I had for a very angsty short fic that I would like to send you as a request, but I promised myself to not be pushy and wait for you to write the first one before sending another. (Just be aware, I literally have a list). Anyway, it felt good reading something fresh for you, I hope to keep seeing your works coming in this cold season so I can read them while snuggling under my fluffy blanket. And don't forget to take care of yourself!!✨ Hugs 💕 ~C

hi dear<33 i'm so glad you enjoyed my little yandere fic, thank you so much for taking the time check it out.💕the fact that you ventured outside your usual comfort zone because it was something i wrote is such a compliment and it means so much to me.🥹

anything with angst immediately grabs my attention so im already intrigued by your fic idea (especially considering how much i loved your first request🤭). and i’m always looking for new ideas and storylines (even if i know i don’t have enough free time to write them all🥹) so please please free to share as many as you’d like!! share the whole list if you feel like it lol, even if i’m still working on your first i promise i don’t think of it as being pushy at all.💕 the whole reason i decided to turn otde into an actual fic in the first place was in the hopes that maybe it could provide some kind of escape and comfort for whoever might stumble upon it, so thinking about you finding comfort in my words during chilly evenings is a beautiful thought that truly warms my heart.🥹

thank you again for your support, its such a source of motivation and im really excited to hear more about the ideas you’ve got!! im hoping to share more of my writing with you in the near future as well.🤭 take care and stay warm out there!! hope to hear from you again soon.🤗💕

[tarotwithdanise]

Hi Dani! I’d love to participate in your FS game💕

My initials are FSCV and I’m an Aries rising!

I’ve only gotten a few personal readings about my FS, but in ALL of them the readers have mentioned he could be foreign or travel a lot, be intuitive, intellectual, creative and fun-loving 🥺 Also a tarot reader and an astrologer read for me about 3 weeks apart from each other and both told me “Aquarius vibes” and “child-like curiousness”… it kinda gave me the chills 👽

As for the negatives, it has come up that he could be prone to get easily distracted from his projects or lose his direction/motivation 🥺

Password: I really like how you write… reading your posts is really fun, but also comforting and it just makes me want to know more! It gives me best friend spilling the tea vibes, honestly 😂 I also like your “about me” post a lot!

Also I love giving feedback, so definitely expect a detailed report back 🫡

If you choose to do this reading, thank you very much. If you don’t, I still thank you for your time and disposition 💕

How will you recognize them?

You will be able to meet this person when you are about to embark a new journey area of your life. It can also be in a vacation or when to reconcile to someone from your past like catching up together. You can meet them too through a family's friend as well. Besides, this meeting will bring a clarity to you that you should started to look at the bigger picture. You will recognize them for their matured appearance, they maybe someone who work in law areas, doctor or a teacher. Otherwise, they considered as professional. At first meeting, you may develop a crush on each other. I also think that they're someone who is from another place and your relationship might be distance. It also says to you that you may find yourself attracted to someone who is from another ethnicity and culture. When I gonna talk about their appearance, they maybe someone who is physically fit and admirable face. They are fashionable and may wear a significant accessories. They love the idea of poets, singing and painting. They can be musician or singer too. Fire and Water signs may overtake their natal chart.

Sorry for late response, i've been through a very very rough phases these past month and weeks. Take care as always. Thank you for participating.

-Danise, The Reader.

[dc418writes]

✨Announcement✨

Hi everyone👋🏾! So first and foremost, 🎆Happy New Year to everyone🎆!!! I hope y’all had a great and restful holidays enjoying time with family, and/or time with yourselves☺️! I hope this year is full of happiness, peace, and success for every one of you💕!

Next…

Thank you so so soooo much for over 600 followers🥂!! I meant to say thank you when the page hit 500, but as we see that didn’t happen lol so here we are! Thank you to everyone who takes the time to read my works and those who comment, reblog, and/or like, it really means a lot to me and from the bottom of my heart I appreciate every single one🥰. Please accept my big hugs (and ignore my tears we all know I’m soft lol).

With this new milestone, I’ve been thinking and I’ve decided that I will NO LONGER be doing taglists. With the different series I have, there are people who want to be tagged for some things and not others, and it’s getting a bit tough to keep up with. Yes I know I could do something like a google doc and just have different sections for those who want to be tagged for all my works or certain characters, however everyone might not have access to that and honestly I’m a bit new to it myself lol. So if you lovely people don’t mind, I’d really appreciate it if everyone turns on notifications for my page (only if you’d like to of course, no pressure!). That way with every post you’ll be notified, and if it’s something you don’t want to see of course you can just ignore. Plus those currently on my taglist who may be inactive or no longer want to be notified don’t have to be currently bombarded by my posts. Given if this doesn’t work out well, maybe we can circle back to doing a google doc or something else if anyone has any ideas!

Also I just wanted to apologize really quick for the lack of work on the series I’ve started over time. Not that anyone has hounded me about them, but I still wanted to assure that nothing has been discontinued! I’ve just been busy with work (I’m full time, 40 hrs a week) and sometimes tiredness, lack of motivation, and not knowing what all I want to include in a part really be bringing ya girl down and stressing her out lol.

Okay, that’s pretty much everything I wanted to say! So as a recap:

NO MORE TAGLISTS!

Please turn on notifications (if you’re not cool with that and/or bothered by it then I completely understand)

No series have been discontinued, and it’s one of my goals to be more consistent with posting for them (be it little additions or full chapters)

And finally, take care of yourselves! Drink water! Have a great 2023!✨💕

@celestianstars @stargirlfics @fumbling-fanfics @lady-olive-oil @themyscxiras @melinda-january @lovelymari4 @adoreyouusugar @lovebittenbyevans @royalwriteroftheuniverse @theartisticqueen @chrisevans-world @literaturelove @ivorylei @elrw24 @pono-pura-vida @yinx1 @justile @sunsetfreedom05 @jackiekae @luvingmyships @give-me-a-million-dollars-pls @bekinds @maxcullen @curlyhairclub @plokyu23 @fullofmelaninsarcasmandepression @nunubug99 @felicity-x0 @ellixthea @jojolu @jnk-812 @captainsamwlsn @wildfirecracker @nina-sj @iammyownlover @chaneajoyyy @thesecretlifeofdaydreamss @shnadaidas @crossfitjesusinblackskinnyjeans

[everybodyshusband]

Ok so I'm not really back to normal but I'm gonna ignore my tummy for a couple minutes in favour of talking to you because I've been dying to send another ask after your wonderful responses!!!

I'll send it in sort of bullet points bc idek if anything I'm saying is even coherent and this might be easier for you to understand? (Or it might not, I'm sorry) In my brain everything makes sense but then sometimes when I say it out loud or write it it's like "what the hell is she saying rn?" So here I go:

- that bit you wrote about swiss and Copia with the soap and swiss stops swearing even when not regressed... oh, it has my heart... Poor baby, I hope Copia makes it up to him with lots of cuddles! I can imagine them laying in bed, Swiss with his head on Copia's chest, as Copia kisses his forehead/hair/nose/whatever he can reach, and promises it's never going to happen again over and over until swiss believes him and eventually falls asleep... (He even drools a little in his sleep, but don't tell him shhhh)

- I understood what you meant about the part I thought I didn't understand in the rain fic! Ugh every time I read that fic I just wanna give him the biggest hug my poor baby... Their dynamic in that fic is so "it's rotten work" 'not to me, not if it's you' I'm screaming and sobbing about it 😭🥹😍

- I will literally always enable you to ramble about any of your fics! Anything! I'm interested!!! I promise!!!! Anything you want to bring up??? Guess what!? I'm all ears!!! Always!!

-not gonna lie I felt pretty shitty all day bc of my tummy (and still do) but your super sweet responses and thinking about sending you an ask kept me a bit motivated (and distracted from the fact that tomorrow is Monday and I gotta work 😭) so thank you!

- I wanted to ask if there's a specific fic that's close to your heart or one that you like a bit more or one you wish got more attention? Because I'll get my greedy lil paws all over it in like 2 seconds flat and start discussing it... I think I've read everything you've posted but I wanna hear your thoughts on your own stuff too!! 💓💓💕💗💗💖💖💗

You're probably sleeping rn and you'll probably see this tomorrow so I hope you slept well and the day ahead is good to you! 🩷

ooh, my darling anon, i've been hoarding this and all your other asks for much, much too long, i am so, so sorry !!! please know i love and appreciate each and every one of your kind words, even if it takes me a very long time to respond 💙

under the cut because of length, haha :'D

i hope that by now your tummy has settled down a bit, i'm sorry this bout of stomach issues seemed to hit you so hard :0 (oh, and don't worry ! your asks always make perfect sense, my friend !!)

don't worry, after the incident, copia makes sure to give soooo much extra love and care to swiss. that ghoul is not escaping those cuddles from copia without plentiful doses of extra love and chaste forehead, cheek and nose kisses, haha !! copia is so very willing to reassure swiss that he's safe and that it won't happen again, you're right (and you're also very right in that swiss drools right onto copia's papal vestments, but not to worry, the stain comes out ...eventually)

ah !! i'm glad it's making more sense now :D i have a chronic case of the "does not write the things in his head into the actual fic" haha !! i agree that rainy deserves all the hugs in the world, it's a very icky headspace for the poor little guy to be in and he deserves so many hugs for doing his best to navigate it. whether or not he accepts the hugs though is another story entirely...

again, i hope your tummy is feeling better by now. or maybe it's been long enough that you've cycled around into another rough patch ? ooh, i hope not. but either way, i'm sending you so many good tummy vibes, hehe <3 (and maybe you'll take solace in the fact that as i'm answering this, tomorrow is a wednesday rather than a monday ?)

ooooh, that's difficult, haha !! the rain fic you mentioned before is the one that's closest to my heart at the moment, i think. but i'm also quite attached to my most recent ficlet with regressed aeon and zephyr because oh my goodness, i love their dynamic and i want to explore it as much as i can, hello ?!? and then on the complete other side of the spectrum i'm very proud of this t4t raindrop filth, haha !! i think because they're all my newest works i haven't had the time to build up an "ew, what was i thinking !??!" response to them, so i'm still feeling very good about these three. and by the looks of it, other people seem to like them as well, which is a nice bonus :)

thank you very much again for your lovely asks, anon 💙 they make me smile and brighten my day every single time i look at them !! i hope life has been treating you well, my dear, and i hope that you have a wonderful day/night depending on where you are in the world 💙

[idyllic-affections]

Hi so i was able to get some time to myself and there are a lot of things i wanna say

1. I GOT IMBIBITOR LUNAE ON FIRST PULL! HE IS MY PRIDE AND JOY AND IM SO FLIPPING HAPPY

2. Also i am in love with your snippets of Ex fatui agent reader x collei. I am so glad i gave you the idea as i knew you can make it as amazing as always! Although, i have one question for the reader, what in teyvat’s name cause them to be Dottore’s assistant?? Like why are they still working with him if all they’re getting is abuse and all??? The only thing i can think of is maybe the paycheck is really really good but is it really worth all that abuse????

3. Also ALSO while i would love for them to just punch scara in the face back. Realistically, they are both very traumatized people who are in very bad situation that they sadly can not escape. So i personally see them just glare at them and calmly say that they are a brat and please calm down. Like in a tone that you use when you are tired with everything that has been culminating for a long time and is just an inch away on going batshit

I will be eagerly waiting for the full fic to come out but ofc take your time and remember to take care of yourself every now and then! Hope you have a good day/night!

- 🐱 Anon

HELLO MY BELOVED ANON WITH SOME OF THE MOST WONDERFUL BRAINROTS 💗💘💖💕🫶💖🫶💕💘💕💗

THAT IS SO AWESOME i think im going to pull for him tbh... he was a lot of fun in his character trial and i never did end up getting kafka, so i think i'm more likely to get him if i do pull <33 no idea what the lore behind this man is but that's okay. he's pretty and his playstyle is fun. i'm now at a high enough level to continue the main trailblaze missions so maybe i'll find out the lore soon!

THIS. this is such a good question and i promise it will be explored in detail in the fic, but to satiate some of your curiosity... [name] sticks around for two main reasons: (1) ...yeah, the paycheck is really good. working under a more dangerous harbinger means they get paid way more than some of their coworkers, such as childe's agents who do not get paid anywhere near as much as they do. (2) they're afraid. dottore knows their name and face. they're scared of what might happen if they quit.

AND THIS the general consensus so far seems to be that everyone wants to put scara in his place, so... that is what we shall do! [name] will, in fact, put him in his place!

you as well, lovely! i promise i am taking breaks in between writing ajsosjsk sometimes i just get a burst of motivation <33

[junk-story]

When u get this u have to put 5 songs u actually listen to, publish. then, send this ask/tag 10 of your favourite followers✨️🎶

Aaaaaa thank you so much to @kurumeki for the tag 💕

In a similar fashion, since I actually listen to a Lot of music I’m going to share the ones I am really binging lately

恋をこれから (Love from Now On) by 20th Century - Of course this is on the list. These guys are really the only idol group I care about with V6 now being disbanded, and of all the songs they’ve released since then, this is the one that I think best utilizes their talents. They are really my comfort music so I’ve listened to them a lot in recent times. It captures that feeling of the moment when you know you’re going to love someone so well for me.

太陽とイカロス (The Sun and Icarus) by BUCK-TICK - This song really nails what makes me love this band so much. The song itself has an upbeat tempo and feels happy in an almost frantic way, which pairs with the lyrics so perfectly. I hear it as a sort of love song to the sun from Icarus, even as the lyrics talk of him burning, a broken body bathed in crimson. The lyrics are not complicated, but every word does its part to craft the beauty and tragedy of this love. I spent the whole day it released listening to it and thinking of how we hurt ourselves for love, what it says about us, what it means. BUCK-TICK are truly masters of their craft, I can’t say enough good things about this band.

裸の心 (Naked Heart) by Aimyon - I stumbled on Aimyon maybe a year back and I really love her music. She’s a very clever lyricist and her songs are easy to listen to. In the case of this one, I also love it because it captures some rawness of emotion that I think English fails to offer. The mix of earnestness, hesitation and fear that comes from sharing your love for another person with them is so potent in this song.

Blue Jean by GLAY - This is always a song I like to listen to when the weather starts to warm up! It feels like warm sunshine to listen to. GLAY is such a solid band and I wish that I listened to them more, to be honest.

Pink Spider by hide - I’ve listened to this song so many times that I sometimes go years without listening to it now, but lately I’ve been in the mood for hide. Pink Spider has been a song I often listen to when I feel hopeless because I’ve related to the spider since I first understood the lyrics. Knowing that you might, perhaps probably, will fail in the pursuit of your dreams and choosing your dreams anyway because the alternative feels unbearable…although the song doesn’t present the situation as hopeful, I find it motivating. And when I fail, I think again, もう一度飛ぼう、この糸切り裂き、自らのジェットで…

If you made it this far, thank you for reading! This was a lot of fun 💕 I’m going to take the easy way out and tag anyone who wants to do this, mutual or not. And tag me in your answer so I can hear about your lovely music too!!

[hotdogdynamitezzz]

hiii i’d love to participate in your ask game for the solar return part if you don’t mind!!!

thank you so much in advance… i hope you have a good day/ night 💕

Thank you for participating and Happy Late Valentines Day <3 I hope you're having a good day/night too.

To start off your 7th house is in Gemini conjunct the Moon in 6th house at a leo degree. This gives me friend circle vibes but close friends, you may meet your crushes at school or through your daily errands in 2023. Maybe this person takes the same bus or train, or you walk by them during your daily routine. You could already know them as the Moon points to familiarity. With a leo degree this makes for fun and playful partners you attract that show you how to love again. It doesn't matter how long or short your relationships will be this year it will be a guaranteed good time. They will make you feel at home and protected. I feel as if it could be a childhood friend with the Moon in Gemini conjunct 7th House tbh.

The ruler of the 7th house is Mercury which falls into the 3rd house at 28 degrees a cancer degree. This further reinforces my hunch that you are more likely to get into relationships within your friend circle or a childhood friend/schoolmate in your neighbourhood. There will be plenty of mental activity and stimulation, so you won't get bored lol. I think you are most likely to meet during a random conversation? or learning a new skill.

Your Venus conjuncts Mars in the 2nd house Aquarius at a Taurus degree exact. This is the most substantial aspect in the entire chart which is cool because Venus looks towards our taste in people and how we will express and receive love this year. Venus here tells me for 2023 you are motivated to get into a long-term relationship that will most likely start off as friends, it's probably a goal of yours for this year. Either that or you are focusing more on making money and self-care. You might be re-evaluating your values and self-worth, as well as setting up more boundaries with others. I think you are looking for a more intellectual and straightforward person this year that can push you further into success and make you feel confident.

Your love life might be spent mostly single with crushes in 2023 because of your North Node in the 6th house, which tells you to further develop your work ethic and wellness habits this year to improve your health or lifestyle. However, I wouldn't be surprised if you end up in a long-term relationship. I think it could go either way, depending on how secure you are in life rn.